SEAL team - Secrets and Lies
by Mirandaforever
Summary: When Clay's one night stand becomes a more complicated relationship. Secrets begin to reveal themselves putting Clay & the team in danger. When Jason's past love resurfaces & a child appears it will test loyalties. Lies are told. Friendships tested & hidden high level secrets are uncovered. There is a personal cost & risk to all of BRAVO. Clay whump. Adult content sex/violence
1. Chapter 1

Clay's quiet as he sits at the bar -beer in hand. Considering sending a - Happy Birthday - text to his ex. It's an old wound and one he's not sure he should open up again. Looking at the text on the screen, his attention is distracted. Focused more on the woman stood at the bar ordering more shots of whiskey.

Tall. Five-nine athletic build with dark brown hair scraped back in a loose ponytail. She piqued his attention, not only because of how attractive she is but also the amount of beer and whiskey she's drinking.

He smiles, watching as she orders another. The barman rolling his eyes in a questioning manner while she stares at him, slugging back the bourbon in one. Slamming the glass on the counter she picks up the bottle of beer and heads to her table at the back of the room.

Another glance at his cell and he decides against the text, pocketing the device. Looking up, drinking his own beer he now notices that the woman is not alone. She's now getting unwanted attention from some muscle-laden guy wearing a white sports vest who's leaning over her table.

He's part of a rowdy group that was sitting at a table behind him and he appears to be trying to action some of his earlier comments about her.

Clay doesn't move from his seat. He's focused, quietly watching keeping an observational eye on the situation.

"C'mon honey, you know you want me, you've been givin' me the come-on all night." He grunts - pulling and tugging at her clothes, trying to force a kiss against her cheek.

She's pushing him back. "GET... OFF ...ME..." she states clearly. Shoving him backward.

He takes no notice of her annoyance and continues grabbing at her. His hands touching all over as the rest of his group are content to watch - not stop him. Clay lets it play out but he makes ready to step in if needed. He really doesn't need the drama of getting involved but if this doesn't stop, he will have no choice.

"Can I get you another?" The barman frowns and Clay nods indicating yes to another beer. "HEY...Guys, can you knock it off!" he shouts across the room. "I can really do without this tonight."

Hearing the voice shout, Vest-guy has his attention distracted, just long enough that she takes the opportunity and swings out with a punch. Her fist catching him unexpectedly hard under the chin. He rocks backward, shocked, holding his face in pain.

"Shit..." Clay laughs. - Impressed as he and the barman look at each other. They both snort with laughter. "Well he deserved that but jeez that was a helluva punch!"

It was but it also angers vest-guy and he lunges forward, stepping up close in her face. "You stupid bitch! You're gonna regret doing that..."

"Yeah well, I told you to get the hell away from me. I warned you!"

"You Lil bitch.. " he rubs his chin, then he smiles. "you're gonna get what's coming to you, don't worry!"

"Worry? ..." she laughs "About you? I don't think so. Now GET... the HELL... away from me!"

Staring at each other he clenches his fist, ready to punch her in retaliation for his bruised ego, more than any damage done. Angry with humiliation about being punched, like that, by a woman - in front of everyone. He's so tempted to lash out but then realizing people are watching, he chooses to let it go.

Picking up his jacket from the back of the chair, he spits at her. "You're _NOT_ worth the effort, you drunken whore!"

Clay sighs loudly. Finishing his beer, he can't stand-by any longer and taking the last gulp of his beer he makes the decision he needs to to get involved.

Standing up from where he's sitting he heads over to the table at the back of the bar. "Is there a problem here?"

"None of your damn business." The guy sneers looking Clay up and down "Go back to your beer kid, and stay out of this, it's not your concern!"

Clay coughs "You know, it doesn't seem to me, like she's interested" he's calm and controlled with his words.

"And what the hell would you know?" The guy turns around. Up close in Clay's face, looking him over - getting a measure of him.

Clay doesn't want trouble, he neither will he back down. The guy now sensing Clay can handle himself, decides he'll be the one to back off - not push it. He sniffs loudly and shakes his head. "You know what... you're welcome to her."

One of the other guys from the group - English. Makes an off the cuff remark that Clay doesn't understand "Looks like it's your lucky night" he nods at Clay and laughs "Maybe Daddy sent someone to save you." He grabs his jacket from the chair and pushes past Clay leaving the bar with his friend.

Clay nods and smiles. "Okay um... well thanks for that." He frowns, puzzled. Having no idea what he's talking about. That leaves one other guy and he and Clay just stare at each other silently a few moments before he shoves him hard in the chest, and then also leaves.

Now turning around he looks for the woman, only to find that she's totally ignoring him - his help. And has gone back to the bar. "Thank you and you're welcome" he sighs.

"Whiskey!" she demands of the barman

"You sure you want another?"

She glares at him as he questions her request "You know what I don't want? That's a lecture from you. Whiskey ...now!" she sarcastically smiles.

"You know you sure have an attitude!" He sighs shaking his head as reluctantly he pours her another shot. "That really is the last one I'm serving you!"

"Fine!" She laughs, smirking as she pays and slugs back the shot in one. Slamming the empty glass on the bar. Then turning around she stares at Clay, who's now sitting on the stool next to her.

He smiles. _He's right. She sure has a serious attitude. Still drama over. L_ eaning his elbows on the bar he goes back to drinking his beer and pulling his cellphone from his pocket he checks his messages.

He glances up watching her from the corner of his eye as she tries to seat herself on one of the other bar stools. In her drunken state, she loses her footing and ends up with a thud on the floor.

 _Man, she is so drunk._ Clay smiles in quiet amusement, as she struggles to get up. Finally, he's unable to watch her struggle any longer ad he offers his hand to help her up.

"I can manage. I'm fine. ... I can do this... " She pushes Clay away, as she stumbles backward almost knocking over the table behind her. Quickly he's able to grab her arm and keep her upright. "I said I'm fine..." she snaps, aggressively pulling her arm away from his grip. "just get the fuck off me!"

Rolling his eyes he frowns. "Yeah, sure you are."

She's annoyed as he let's go and goes back to his seat. His tone of superiority and she grabs at his arm for attention. "What _you,_ don't think I'm okay? You think I'm drunk?"

"Well... no, no I'm sure you're fine. I mean you said so, didn't you?" She's annoyed him but he's certainly not going to get in an argument not while she's in this drunken state.

"Yeah, whatever." She sneers as she looks at the empty glass on the bar in front of her. "You know not every girl needs a hero!" She slurs as she picks up her bag, then staggers her way to the exit.

"Oh, my God..." he laughs "Did that really just happen?" He finishes up drinking his beer and checks the time on his watch. "Time I made a move too!"

~ # # ~

Walking out into the parking lot he spots the guys from earlier. Suspiciously, hanging around by a dark-colored truck he can see them watching the woman, as she drunkenly stumbles across the empty lot.

 _What the hell are they waiting for?_ Clay questions as he keeps his eyes on them.

One of them throws down his cigarette as if he is about to make a move, when looking up he spots Clay watching. He stays where he is, smiling he nods, acknowledging Clay. "Hey kid..." he calls out "So, I hear she's a hooker, you'll let me know if she's any good, right? I'm thinking of having a turn or you into sharing?" he laughs.

Clay shakes his head ignoring the comments as he analyzes the situation. Making a decision he needs to intervene as she seems totally oblivious to the potential danger.

She fumbles for her keys, taking them out of her purse and dropping them several times on the ground as she attempts to unlock the door of her rental car.

"You know, it's _not_ a good idea to do that!" Clay was faster than her and is standing beside the vehicle when she gets there.

She looks up "Oh, God... not you again. Why don't you just leave me the hell alone."

Clay sighs, snatching the keys from her hand, a fairly easy task, given the amount of drink she's consumed "You can't drive -not like this."

"What you, my mother, or something? Who the hell cares what you think, I'll do what I want! I told you earlier, I'm fine. Now leave me the fuck alone!" She makes a grab for her keys but misses. Clay snatching them away and stuffing them into his pocket.

"Uhhuh...no way!" Clay shakes his head, as she scowls at him. "Hey look..." he softens his tone " let me give you a ride home. It's really not safe for you to stay here alone." He looks back at the guys who are still hovering, suspiciously. She looks back and the guy, she hit earlier, starts shouting.

"Hey Bitch, you gonna come suck my dick, when he's done?"

Clay sighs, the look on her face as she tries to ignore the comments. "C'mon please, I can't leave you here like this, and I promise..." he puts his hands up "it's just a ride home, that's it!" He smiles "You can pick this up tomorrow, when you're sober up" Clay tips his head on one side, smiling "Please? It would make me feel better to know you're safe"

Finally, watching him she smiles. He's slightly younger than her twenty-nine - thirty she guesses but even in her drunken state she can see he's very cute. That and the fact that she's getting very tired reluctantly she agrees to his offer. "Okay. You can give me a lift, I'm staying at a motel down the block. It's not far"

~ # # ~

"So what's your name?" Clay smiles as he watches her leaning against the passenger window, closing her eyes she's almost falling asleep. All the liquor she consumed now catching up on her.

"Oh, um... everyone calls me C.J," Rubbing her head, she's hot and the motion of the truck moving is not making her feel so good.

"Hey C.J, I'm Clay but some people call me Spenser" he smiles.

At long last, her pretty face returns a smile. "Oh, you know you're very cute...Clay! " she smiles, closing her eyes. It's only for a moment because suddenly she's feeling really nauseous. "STOP!" she cries out "Oh, God... STOP! Please ... stop the truck!"

He jams on the brakes, as she opens the door and falls out on to the street.

She really doesn't feel well, as wave after wave of nausea comes over her, and thinks she might throw up. "Oh, God... not good!"

She leans forward, her head spinning, taking a moment the head back against the metal side of the truck she sucks in the cool night air. Hoping it will stop her throwing up.

She swallows, taking long deep breaths, and eventually, the feeling subsides. Clay offers her a bottle of water that he keeps in the front glove compartment.

"Thanks!" she smiles, taking a moment to get her breath, before taking a large sip of water "Urrghhh...geez, I do not feel good!" She catches her reflection in the side mirror "Oh, God... I don't look so good either, do I?"

As she tries to tidy her hair in the small side mirror. Clay smiles. He doesn't want to agree with her, but he can't disagree with either. "Just drink the water, it will all seem better tomorrow"

~ # # ~

Clay fumbles in his pocket, getting her keys out for the motel door. Struggling to find the right key, she smiles "You have to jiggle it - it's stiff!" She smiles, flirtatiously, leaning her chin on his shoulder while he opens the door. She squeezes past him in the tight space of the doorway, "It's a bit like you" she smiles rubbing her hand across his groin teasing him.

He laughs, unsure what to say, slightly shocked by her forwardness.

Once through the door, he places her keys on the small side table that's just inside.

She isn't interested in what he's doing. She's already stripped off - naked. "I need a shower and to sober up!" she mumbles.

"Oh um... okay! Well ... I'll leave just leave these keys here and head off then!" he frowns. He's not quite sure where to look but his eyes are drawn to the curves of her naked butt. He's looking at her peach-like skin, and he can't stop smiling _Oh, my God, she is so fit!_

"There's cold beer in the fridge..." she calls out over the sound of the running water. "if you wanna stay?"

Thinking about the situation, he's unsure what to do. He thinks about her. By the looks of her, she must be older than him - Thirty-five he'd guess. Though her age doesn't bother him because there is definitely something about her he likes. He takes a deep breath. Seeing her naked body, which he has to admit - _Was pretty darn sexy!_ His natural instincts are fired up and his hormones are sending his cock into overdrive."Okay, what the hell. Why not?" He smiles.

Opening the small refrigerator he takes out a beer. Then sitting on the edge of the bed he watches the TV. - left on. "Football, alright... "

She's out of the shower and wrapped in only a small towel, she stands in front of him. Her long, wet hair is pinned on top of her head. _Oh, man! There is_ ** _definitely_** _something about her I like!_

She stands between his legs and taking the beer from his hand, she smiles - seductively. She's flirting as she starts to drink.

Clay lets out a long, frustrated sigh. He's thinking how forward she is, and how much she's turning him on. He can't help but stare at her. Her making it obvious what she wants. He smiles -cautious. She smiles back, biting her lip teasingly.

He's checking her over. S _he is so Goddamn hot, but do I really want another one night stand?_ His mind is in overdrive, but if he was too be honest all he's thinking is, _I wanna fuck her so much, right now!_

He keeps looking at her and her at him. Her smile definitely teasing him. It works and finally, he gives in. _What the hell, if she's up for it, then so am I. Anyway, Sonny would be telling me to go for it. He'd be so disappointed if I didn't._ He runs his hand up her thigh, testing the water. Caressing the soft, clean skin, under the towel. Then as he reaches the soft folds between her legs he pauses, waiting to see how she responds.

She doesn't move, just stands there, biting her lip, watching him, still drinking the beer in her hand. "So, are you gonna fuck me or not?" she smiles.

He gulps at her question. He's so excited he can barely speak. "If that's what you want?"

She smiles, putting her hand to his, under the towel, moving it further between her legs. Then closing her eyes, she lets out a gentle sigh of anticipation. Licking her lips, she lets him know she's enjoying his touch. Then she lets out another breathless sigh and unwraps her towel - dropping it to the floor. Then leaning forward she kisses him her tongue forced between his lips.

From the wet feeling between her legs, he can tell how much she wants this. He's so turned on and his hardness is pressing against his pants. Moving his hand on to the curves of her waist, he slowly slides them down and around the pert shape of her butt, before pulling her closer towards him.

Kissing him more forcefully she's willing him to her and then his lips are on hers, their tongues entwined, making him more and more wanting. Clay's so hard and so desperate to fuck now that he brings her body crashing down on to the bed. "You want this?" he questions, staring her in the eyes "I mean, I can stop if this is not what you want?" he asks but anticipating the positive answer he gets.

"Oh, I want this!" she smiles frantically, undoing his belt as he drops his jeans to the floor. Nothing is going to stop him from giving in to his desires as he kisses her neck, down her collarbone, and over her breasts. His tongue flicking across and around, each one, all over her soft skin.

The touch of his lips against her nipple makes her sigh loudly with desire. Each kiss is making her want him more. Her body aches, her back arching bringing it forward towards his touch. "Urgh!" she sighs softly. Each touch of his fingers brings another wave of longing and tingling excitement inside her.

Standing back looking at her naked body lying there on the bed. Clay eagerly pulls his shorts off and his shirt up over his head -dropping that on the floor beside the bed with the rest of his clothes.

Staring at her, he wants her so much and pressing against her with his hardened groin. The feeling of her firm, strong, grip on his skin, pulling him in, willing him to take her. "Oh, God.. C.J, you're gorgeous!"

She smiles, hearing him say her name and it turns her on, she runs her hands over his fit toned chest, feeling every inch of each of his hard, toned muscle, before she pulling him down on top of her body. Letting out another gasp of pleasure she guides his hardness deep inside her.

Clay has to admit this is certainly a heat of the moment fuck. There's nothing tender about it, and he uses all his strength in each thrust that he pounds into her. But she doesn't feel delicate like the other women he's been with. No, she's embracing each powerful thrust and motion, forcing herself back against him, wanting it like this.

 _"Oh God!"_ she gasps "Clay,...don't stop. Just fuck me... harder! _"_

He smiles as he grinds into her, and now she can't hold, reaching her peak. The desire for him fills every part of her, splintering her senses. She closes her eyes crying out enjoying the moment. Shutting him out from her world, lost in the pleasurable waves of orgasm as they wash over her entire body.

As he feels her muscles tense and the look on her face, he also let's go. He was holding back, waiting for her to cum. Waiting, until he could feel that surge of fulfillment but now he lets go and his warm cream releases inside her before he collapses with exhaustion against her naked hot skin. "Oh, God... fuck that was so good!"

He smiles. He's never fucked with that intensity before. The power and the energy they created, he's experienced nothing like it. He's always been so conscious of his body's strength when he's been with other women. Always holding something back, but this, with her, he felt like he could just let go. She was so powerful and wanted it so much, that she could take it all, matching his strength with her own.

She's breathing hard, her breasts rising and falling as she tries to calm down. The wet sweat glistens on her neck and chest, as he kisses her again. Then she rests her head on his chest, as he lays on his back and she has this satisfied smile on her face.

Leaning up on her elbows, she gives him a huge grin, kissing him and looking him directly in the face, close up.

He smiles at her, brushing the loose strands of hair that frames her face back, looking at the sexual spark in her eyes. She's so hot and has such energy, that it makes him want to do it again.

~ # # ~

Daylight's coming through the cheap curtains, and she squints at the light. The noise from the TV, which they left on, makes her head hurt. Looking around she assesses the fall out from the night before.

Then turning her, very delicate head, she looks at the naked guy next to her. "Oh shit!"

She lies back, looking at the ceiling, closing her eyes she sighs. She takes another glance at the guy next to her and lets out another long sigh. Her head is pounding and she checks the time on her phone "Oh, shit... shit!"

"You say something?" Clay turns over and smiles at her

"Oh..." She smiles surprised. _He's actually not bad!_ _Younger than normal, but very, very good looking_. Not that she's remembering much about what happened last night, or how he got here. But the parts she does remember - feel pretty good. _I seriously have to stop drinking!_

He smiles, again reassuringly "Are you okay?"

"Yeah..." she nods, taking a deep breath. Wondering how much of a mess she looks "I'm fine!" she sighs and rubs her head, running her fingers through her matted hair.

Clay brushes the hair from around her face and leans in to kiss her.

 _Hmmm... oh yeah! Now I remember! Last night was pretty damn good_. She smiles.

They lay quiet she's watching him. Unsure what to say he leans in and kisses her again. She relaxes and they just keep kissing, their tongues frantically in and out of each others' mouths sparking a new wave of desire.

It doesn't take long and they're back in position for sex. But this time, it's all much softer - intimate. They're taking their time with each other. Slow and controlled. Fingers caressing and exploring each other's skin. Gentle excited kisses on her breasts. Teasing, he sucks wanting, at her nipples, bringing waves of pleasure. He keeps bringing her to a peak and then he stops, backing off just enough but not too much that it loses the excitement.

They're both kissing and touching. Teasing and tormenting their bodies. Everything's about pleasure this time, not just about fast sex. It's about bringing each other to a climax, holding back, letting the feeling subside, before repeating. It allows for wave after wave of tension to build until finally, Clay can't hold. The peak tips over and he has to let go of his excitement, his creamy fire exploding deep inside her "Oh, GOD!" He frowns " Sorry... sorry I was tryin' to hold that but you got me too... "

"It's okay... " She smiles watching him, then she closes her eyes. Pushing her hips towards him as he stays inside her, she grinds against him, getting the right sensation until she's able to finish what they started. Pushing harder and harder against him until she peaks her pleasure as well.

They lay silent. Quietly enjoying the peace. Him stroking her hair, his free hand feeling the curve of her back with his fingers. He's wondering if sex can get better than this? Not sure, but the one thing he does know, he sure as hell wants to find out. It feels like she's a drug. He's had a high and he definitely wants more.

They lay there, still in each other's arms, drifting in and out of sleep. She's deep in thought, running her fingers over his skin, then she frowns "What did you say you do again? Did you tell me? I can't remember" she questions.

He coughs to cover the lie he's about to tell "Gym instructor..." the words nearly choke him "at the Naval Base" He wonders if she's really going to buy the story. He always feels bad lying about what he does, but sometimes, it's just easier this way and now he quickly changes the subject "I'm hungry, how about you?"

"Starving!" she sighs "You wanna eat?"

He's looking at her laying next to him and running his hands down her curves and as he looks at her naked butt, just lying only inches from his touch, he can already feel a stirring in his groin again. He sighs. "How about we order in?" He runs his hand up the inside of her thigh.

"Mmm..." she smiles " you know, that sounds like a great idea" She rummages in the side table draw for the takeout menu "You want Pizza? This place will bring beer too!"

As his hand reaches the top of her thigh and he smiles "You know what...we'll eat in a while!" he takes the menu from her hand and throws it on the floor. Then he pulls her body on top of him.

~ # # ~

They've been talking, while eating pizza, laying in bed. They're so comfortable and relaxed with each other and she smiles sipping from her beer. "So, tell me a sad story."

"A sad story?" he frowns puzzled. Looking at her she's sat in front of him, legs crossed, wearing only his shirt. _God, she's sexy!_ He sighs as he strokes his fingers over the soft skin of her legs.

"Yeah you know..." she grins playfully "people who have drunken one night stands, they all have sad stories. That's why they do it"

"Okay... you want my sad story?" He's still puzzled as to why "Well um... my girlfriend dumped me, just when I needed her." he pauses "That sad enough for you?"

"No.." she laughs "not really. You love her? Your girlfriend I mean."

"Yeah... yeah, suppose I do... did..." he stops "Wait, I'm not sure if I'm supposed to tell the girl I'm in bed with that I love another?" he frowns.

"Who cares?" She shrugs "You think she was the _one_?"

"I hoped... maybe. I don't know anymore"

"Well, this is more pathetic than sad. Surely you can do better?" she smiles "So, why are you picking up lonely girls in bars?"

"That's what you are? A lonely girl." He frowns and then takes a deep breath "How about my Dad's an asshole. He uses me when he wants something and wasn't around when I was a kid. I guess ... I have Dad issues"

She smiles and raises her beer "Okay that... that I can understand. So, firstly a toast, thanks to your, ex-girlfriend, because her dumping you, means I've been able to have some great sex" she laughs "and here's to having ass' for Dads and the issues they bring. Cheers!" She gives him a more serious look "Do you think it's over ... you and your girlfriend I mean?"

Clay takes a deep breath. "When we split, I would've done anything to get her back with her, but now..." he looks up at her "now, I'm not so sure that she's really what I want."

She smiles as she eats the last slice of pizza "Well if she is, then you should call her. I mean if you wanna get her back. You should see how she's doing. Girls like that stuff -so I'm told" she laughs.

"Okay, I'll think about your advice" he smiles, taking another swig of his beer. She's still drinking and Clay's strangely impressed by the amount she can drink. "So come on, I told you mine, what's your sad story?" he looks at her

"Yours wasn't a sad story" she laughs, unsure what she should say "I don't really have one either" she shrugs

"I'm sure that's not true. Girls that pick up lonely guys in bars always have a story" he laughs teasing her.

She smiles, finishing up her pizza and wipes her hands. She's hesitating and then finally she takes a deep breath. "Okay, well where do I start. There was a guy. A guy I was in _love_ with, I mean really, really _in_ love with. I thought he was special -the one. But ... " she stops and takes a moment having some more of her beer

"Oh, don't tell me he was married?"

"Predictable, yeah?" she laughs "Yeah, yeah he was married and stupidly, I thought he would leave his wife. You know, it's the usual story"

"And he didn't?"

"Well ... he kinda did. Not in the end but... oh, it's complicated.. " she shakes her head "He did tell her about me but...well things didn't work out." She swigs from her bottle of beer. Clay's confused and he frowns. " I made a stupid mistake." she sighs "I didn't think he'd go through with it - leave her. And so...I went out, got drunk and um... " she awkwardly laughs " much like last night, slept with someone. He found out and ..." she sighs again "wouldn't forgive me. It was a huge mistake." She looks at her beer bottle, it's nearly empty and finishes the rest.

Clay nods his head not really knowing what to say "Guess that would do it, sleeping with someone else." Clay shrugs "So what happened?"

"That was it. It got messy for a while, his wife, work, stuff like that" She pauses "in fact, it got really messy. But .." she shrugs ".. there was no going back for us. I still can't believe he was really going to leave her that I would have never guessed" She sighs and shakes her head "Like I say, it was my fault - my mistake" She takes another beer from the case on the floor "I made some really wrong choices that night and I did a regrettable thing. But I can't change it"

"He didn't try to work it out with you? If he was serious and wanted to be with you."

She laughs "He's um... he's not that kinda guy -stubborn. His way or no way, so... there was no way he would talk about it. He made his mind up and that was it. Would never give me a chance to explain - just cut me off, it's the way he is...was"

"And the one night stand? You didn't see him again?"

"No. No that was just two friends, two stupid friends, who were in the wrong place, at the same time. It killed our friendship though" She sighs as her head replays the night in question "Like I said my fault. I should never have let it happen but, there we have it! "

Clay can see it playing on her mind and he kisses her "It's okay." he smiles and raises his beer "Here's to bad life choices!"

"Bad life choices..." she smiles He clinks his bottle against hers "and sad stories"

Placing the beer on the side table, she straddles her legs over him. Then sitting on top, she leans forward to kiss him. He slides his hands up under the shirt, gripping her waist, holding her hips, pulling her tighter against him and she closes her eyes. Determined to forget about the past, she loses herself in this moment -with him.

~ # # ~

It's late morning when they wake. Her head laying on Clay's chest, he has his arms wrapped around her back. She stretches over, checking her phone - the time and messages. "You know this is the third day we've been in this room." she smiles looking at the accumulation of bottles and takeout boxes on the floor beside the bed. "Surely those gym bunnies are missing you? I mean is, you can't keep wagging work like this, and ..." she puts her phone back and sighs "my meeting has been postponed and that means I have to go back, to Washington."

Clay takes a deep breath. He's not sure how he's going to feel - not seeing her. But he has to admit, this is an unreal situation, one he's got carried away in, so he knows it has to come to an end. "You're right, I do have to go back to work." He knows he's been lucky, he's not been spun up, but that's going to come to an abrupt end -soon. And then how will he explain it? Ending this now would be the best thing.

"I'll probably be back in a couple of weeks, can I call you? Perhaps we could hook up again, or are you gonna send that text, to your ex?" she smiles.

"Why don't you call me..." Clay gets up from the bed pulling his shorts on "and I'll let you know the situation, we'll take it from there" Clay cuts himself off. Thinking about everything, it's probably for the best if he doesn't see her again.

Watching as he gets dressed, she has a feeling from the tone of his reply, that they won't be seeing each other again.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: This is not happening**

 **Three Weeks Later**

Clay's been spun up three times since he last saw C.J. and he's checked his phone every day since, but disappointingly, he's heard nothing from her this past week.  
The first week they sexted each other every day when they could. Then he was gone on a mission for a few days and perhaps she thought he had cooled. _Well to be honest I haven't texted her either._

He smiles as he looks at the last message she, a naked picture of her in the shower. _She is so damn_ sexy. he sighs _but she is so bad!_ he laughs.

Later in the day his phone vibrates, and he smiles as he looks at the message

CJ : Just landed. Hungry. How about you?

C: I know a motel that do great Beer and Pizza?

CJ: Meet there 1hr? :) x

C: :) x

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Clay opens the motel room door and takes a deep breath as he looks at her standing in the doorway. Her fit toned body squeezed into the slim grey pencil skirt and matching jacket. "Oh my god, you look fantastic!"

He smiles a large broad grin. She's already undone most of the buttons on her shirt, displaying her white, lace bra underneath, he's turned on and quickly pulls her inside, unable to keep his hands off her body.

They spend the rest of the afternoon in various sexual positions, and now, finally having showered they lay in each other's arms on the bed quietly, without being all over each other.

Clay's softly caressing her skin, as they drink the beers that he brought while they wait for the pizza they ordered. He sighs to himself _God I hope I don't get a spun up tonight because I still haven't found the opportunity to tell her, honestly, about my job._

"So, did you send that text, to your girlfriend?"

"Text?" he frowns wondering why she would ask that right now. "Oh um... No. No, I left it "

She smiles. Inside her head, she's glad, more than she realized she would be. "Look Clay, I wanted to ask you a favor" she looks at him smiling awkwardly "I'm just going to come out and ask it, so just listen before you say no"

She pauses, then coughs before she asks "My parents, they're in town tomorrow, and you can say no. And I want you to know it's not a meet the parents date or anything serious, just..." she sighs ".. just, it would keep my mother quiet, if I took a guy to dinner. After my history of guys, which is not great" she laughs "She worries that I'll get left on shelf"

She pauses watching him as he frowns at her. "It's just dinner, in a restaurant, and my father is paying" she smiles "So will you come?"

"Dinner?" he frowns "With your parents? Are you serious? Is this a marriage proposal?" he laughs

"No dumb ass!" She punches him on the arm "Look, I know it sounds a dumb thing to ask, especially as we hardly know each other but I've got no one else I can ask."

He smiles, kissing her "Sure, I'll go"

"Really?" she frowns "Are you sure? I mean you don't have to."

"I said yes, didn't I? But um... first" He rolls her over on her back "...first, you have to do something for me"

She frowns "Oh really, what would that be?"

"Oh, I'll show you." He pulls her leg up around his waist. Running his hand over her breast as he kisses her.

"Mmmm!... Okay, I guess I can manage the repayment terms" she smiles, taking a long deep breath as he thrust himself inside her.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

 **Outside the restaurant**

"Okay now listen" she's nervous and it shows "About my father. He's a bit um... old fashioned, but don't worry, I'll head off any awkward questions, and so will my Mother. Trust me, once she sees you, she won't want him frightening you off " She laughs "Just um.. stay off politics and religion oh and... the military he's got a thing about it" He can hear a nervous panic in her voice as she continues "Football. Football's good. Yeah you can talk about that."

"Hey, relax I got this" he smiles, kissing her

"Oh... " she sighs ".. this is such a stupidly bad idea. I mean, how the hell am I going to explain how we know each other? I mean _Hi this is Clay, we eat Pizza, drink beer and have great sex"_ she frowns

"Are you really gonna tell them that? I mean about the great sex."

"Oh yeah..." she laughs " .. yeah, I'm gonna tell them about, _all_ the great sex" she smiles, looking him in the eye. Unable to keep her hands off him she runs her fingers around his face then puts her lips on his Kissing him.

"It will be fine" Clay kisses her back "I've done this type of thing before" He recalls in his head, the awkward encounter with Stella's parents

"You have?" She frowns "Well I haven't !"  
She hadn't. The only time she had an encountered a meeting with parents, it didn't go too well as she remembers. Actually, it wasn't good at all. It was the mother, of the married guy she was seeing, and she arrived early to stay, and walked in on them having sex on the couch. No, that was never going to get the parents seal of approval.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Her Mother looks excited, as they head towards the table "He's nice dear. A little younger this time, but, very handsome"

"Don't get too excited" CJ's father pulls a scowl. His daughter's life choices didn't have a good track record, especially where men were concerned and the fact that this one, appears much younger, doesn't bode well in his opinion.

C.J rolls her eyes as she sees her Fathers disparaging look as she introduces Clay to them. The first thing Clay notices is how tall and muscular C.J's father is, and he frowns wondering if he recognises him from somewhere.

"So, Clay, CJ tells me you work as gym instructor at the Naval base?"

"Um... Yes Sir"

"Yes, that's right" she smiles, quickly changing the subject of the conversation "More garlic bread anyone?"

"Really? See, I would have said you have a smell of military about you. But you've never thought to enlist?"

"Dad, we talked about this. Not every guy I meet needs to enlist" she smiles but she kicks her father under the table then glares at him.

"Roger!" her mother frowns "Can I remind you about what we spoke about earlier"

"Um... No Sir, no I can't say I've considered it" Clay coughs taking a large swig of wine. He hates lying.

"Funny, see I'd swear, you'd be a military guy. Guess my sense are off tonight." He smiles at CJ and drinks his wine

C.J kicks Clay under table this time "Football! " she mouths

The evening passes quickly. They enjoy their meal and continue just making idle chatter. Her father having been pre-warned to be on his best behaviour.  
So basically, all they did, was eat and leave.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Outside she kisses Clay, smiling "Thank you for that. Now my Mother will sleep much better"

Clay laughs as he grabs her around the waist with both hands "Come back to mine?"

He takes her a little by surprise with his question "Yours?" she frowns "That sounds serious. Why?"

"Not serious, just because I want you to."

She thinks about it. How it seems, like it's a big deal to him. And so, she seriously considers it. After all he just did this for her "Oh, what the hell, yes! But I'll have to swing by the motel first and pick up some of my clothes. I have a meeting first thing in the morning"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

 **Clay's Apartment**

Daylight comes through the window of Clay's apartment its 07:30hrs

"I have to get to my meeting. It's um... actually at the Naval base, can you drop me off there? My rental is still at the Motel."

"What do you do again?" Clay frowns. He can't remember if she told him. If she did he seems to have forgotten.

"Oh...you know if I told you that, I'd have to kill you" She laughs as he frowns. Then she jumps on the bed, on top of him, kissing him and rubbing her hand over his chest. She coughs before answering his question "Just admin stuff, for the Navy. Paperwork, mainly. Nothing of any great importance"

"Okay. So, you're not like a secret spy then?" he laughs as he tickles her

"No!" she squeals "No, not like a spy, stupid" she punches him "I wish. No, more like a...a secretary" she laughs

As she gets dressed, Clay can't keep his hands off her. She's wearing a slim fitting, navy blue pencil skirt with matching, tight fitting jacket

"You know.." He smiles ".. I like this _secretary_ look you have going on here." He can't help but rub his hands up the inside of her skirt, then further up to the top of her thigh "You look amazing!"

"Stop! I'm going to be late" she licks her lips and rubs her hands across his back. He lays his head on her stomach and continues working his hands up her thigh to the top of her panties. She can feel his fingers toying with her between her legs. "Mmmm!" she groans softly "Clay stop! You're gonna make me late"

"I don't care! Tell them the traffic was bad or something" he puts his hand round back of her head, pulling her on to his lips for a kiss and just for a moment, she thinks about giving in to him.

Then she stops and slaps him, playfully, around the head "Seriously Clay. Down boy!" she wriggles her skirt down. "I can't be late. Not today" she smiles wistfully looking at him.

His phone blips and he checks the messages. He's been called to the base as well "Okay!" he puts his hands up in the air and jumps off the bed and heads into the bathroom. Looking in the mirror he can sees her reflection from the other room, and in that moment, he realises he's falling for her.

She smiles watching him go into the bathroom. She catches herself in the mirror, smiling. She sighs, anxiously wondering if she's falling for him. Checking the time on her watch, she smiles. Then she unzips her skirt, letting it drop to the floor. "Maybe being a little late wouldn't be so bad."

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

 **09:14hrs Virginia Naval base**

Commander Blackburn turns from his office window, to the sound of a knock on the door "Enter!"

The door opens and he smiles "Lieutenant Lewis. Please, come in."

" Sir! Sorry I'm late. The traffic was terrible" C.J smiles as she enters, shaking his hand

"That's okay. How are you Lieutenant?"

"Good thanks, and you? "

He nods "Yeah I'm good. This..." he points towards the table "...this is Mandy Ellis, CIA, I think you've met before" they smile, acknowledging each other.

"And this... this is Petty Officer, Lisa Davis "

CJ smiles putting her hand forward as they exchange formalities "Pleased to meet you"

As Davis responds she feels a little starstruck. She's heard of Lieutenant Catherine Jane Lewis, a female officer with a fearsome reputation and someone she's often aspired to be like. "Very pleased to meet you. I've heard a lot about you." Davis nods

Introductions done and Blackburn continues "Well there's still no green lit on Somalia. The intel has been flagged by command chain and so we're waiting for the go from central. Plus, um... Delta have injuries, so it will take time to set up a new team" he sighs

"Damn! Really?" C.J frowns. She's not impressed, and she sighs "So why are they dragging their feet on this? Did they not get my report?"

"Yeah they did, but... " He shrugs "I don't have the answers. It's coming from somewhere higher up the food chain. It's beyond my pay grade. To be honest, I'd have thought you'd probably be able to find out more than me."

She sighs and shakes her head "No. No nothings been said to me" she frowns "But if this is the case, then it was really a waste of time me coming back from Washington. So why was I told to come?"

"Well, not necessarily " Blackburn shuffles some files on his desk "As you're here, there's something been urgently, pushed our way that you might be interested in."  
He pushes a file across the desk, in CJ's direction and she flicks through the paperwork

"Mandy's been given green lit on this Nigeria op. As you may be aware, jihad linked rebels there involved in various kidnaps, of female, aid agency workers and several other high-profile targets. Word is, they're using them as jihadist brides, or ransom. Dependent on their perceived value. It's been put forward from central intel, that you be included"

"Really, this is been pushed my way. " She frowns. She's still pissed that her Somalia op has been shelved. She'd been working on it for six months. But looking at his file it piques her interest and she gives a smile. "Well I'm here so ... fill me in."

"We're just about to go briefing. So, if you're interested? Then you can head up with us"

"Sure, sounds good to me. As I say I'm here, and it'll pass the time. So, why not?" she shrugs

"Well, as I say, it was passed to me from command. They were the ones said you might be available. So, as you say ...if it passes the time"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

They get up to leave for the briefing room, but Blackburn holds CJ back "Lieutenant, can I have a moment of your time first?"

Mandy frowns, looking back from the doorway.

"Ms Ellis, we'll be there in just a minute. Could you close the door"

He waits as Mandy and Davis leave then he continues "Lieutenant, before you head up there, I think you should know something about this operation" He pauses wondering how well received what he's going to say will be "It's um... just a heads up. About the team that are green lit on this" he pauses again

"Yeah, what about it?" she frowns. She's puzzled but then something registers with her from the look on his face and she guesses what he's about to say  
"Oh no! No, you have got to be kidding me." she sighs "This is BRAVO?" she frowns "Seriously? And someone put my name forward for this?" she sighs " Well I can't believe you went for it."

"I didn't have a lot of choice or trust me I wouldn't. No, no it was kind of put to me that you going, it wasn't actually an option I had any say in"

She sighs, rubbing her forehead, closing her eyes for moment as she thinks. She takes a deep breath. "Maybe I was a little quick on the uptake of this" she sighs again "But, they know, Bravo I mean they know it's me, that I'm being asked to do this?"

Blackburn shakes his head "No, no not yet" Blackburn is weighing up the consequences of this situation. Wondering if this really is such a good idea "You still wanna do it?"

She hasn't had any proper _action_ for some time and as Somalia is off, she doesn't really want to say no. _But BRAVO! God why?_ She tips her head, sighs loudly as she thinks "Arrghh!" she rubs her head "Yeah, yeah okay! What the hell. But you know they're not gonna like it, right?"

Blackburn silently nods in agreement but that doesn't mean he doesn't have, lots, of reservations about it.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

 **Briefing Room 09:30hrs**

Everyone is lounging around in their chairs, just chilling and hanging lose waiting for the briefing to start.

Jason's bouncing the ball for Cerb. Sonny has his feet up on table. Ray's taking the opportunity to close his eyes and both, Trent and Brock are half asleep at the back of the room.

Mandy gives a loud cough, ready to begin as Blackburn opens the door escorting Lieutenant Lewis into the room.

Sonny's chair is facing the door and he is the first to sneer "Oh, no!" he sighs "You have got to be fucking kidding me, right?"

He throws the ball of paper, he screwed up, towards Ray who lifts his shades and frowns. Jason has his back to the door and hearing the tone in Sonny's voice, he swings his chair around to look

"Fuck!" he takes a deep breath "Oh, no way! Uh uh." He stands up, taking his cap off running his hands through is hair before replacing it "Eric, what the hell? No, no way! No fucking way is this happening."

CJ shakes her head, frowning as she looks at him "Nice to see you too Jason"

"Alright Jason, just sit down." Blackburn tries to take back control of the room "You all need to listen up."

Jason stays standing up and he glares as he turns to face Mandy "Did you know?" Raising his voice, he points in Blackburn's direction "You didn't think to say anything about this? Seriously, you're telling me there was no one else you could get?"

"Jason!" Mandy frowns as she tries to offer an explanation "Look, we've only just been handed this. Whatever your problem is ... this was not our doing"

Whatever she tries to explain, it doesn't matter because he won't let her finish and he starts shouting again "I said, NO ...WAY!" he glares long and hard at CJ "Eric, I repeat this is _NOT_ happening!"

Jason is shaking his head as he paces back and forward around the room. He only stops as he looks up when the door opens again.

He frowns as Clay walks in, smiling "Sorry I'm late guys, the traffic was nightma...re ..." he stops mid-sentence not getting his words of explanation out.  
 _Oh my god!_

He can't quite believe what he's seeing as C.J is stands right in front of him. She's dumbstruck, her mouth falls open as she looks at him. Neither of them dare say a word.

Blackburn makes the formal introductions "Oh good afternoon, Mr Spenser. It's nice of you to _finally_ join us."

Clay pulls out a chair from the table. He can't take his off eyes of CJ. _What the hell is she doing here?_

"Lieutenant Lewis, this is Petty officer, Clay Spenser. He's fairly new, to Bravo and he's late!" Blackburn points to his watch "I don't think you two have met before"

She nods, looking at Clay and then she looks around at Jason as he continues to stare at her. Before she knows what to say, Clay puts out a hand to shake. He convincingly pretends that he has no idea who she is "Clay Spenser. Nice to meet you, Ma'am."

Still dumbfounded, all she can do is blankly stare at him " C.J, um... sorry..." she corrects herself "Lieutenant Lewis, pleased to meet you." she frowns

Blackburn hands over to Mandy to start the briefing. She refers to the current situation and forward planning for the operation. While she's talking, C.J's not listening, instead turning around to look at Clay. She frowns, silently questioning him. _What the hell is going on here?_ He acknowledges her questioning look by frowning in reply.

Jason buts into Mandy's talk "No. No, I don't like it. Like I said, it's not happening."

Ray catches the glances between CJ and Clay. He frowns as he stares at her, making her quickly look away. She now re-focuses her attention on the rest of the people in the room. Her gaze landing back with Jason.

"Oh, here we go!" she sighs "Jason _Hayes_ " she mocks "He doesn't like it, so it's _not gonna happen!_ " she puts her fingers up making mocking quote marks "Well, there's a surprise." she lets out a deep exasperated sigh "C'mon then Jason, tell us what is it that you don't like?"

"What other than you?" Sonny sneers under his breath, making his disdain for her completely obvious.

Clay's uncomfortable about Sonny's comment but he keeps quiet, he can feel the atmosphere in the room but he's unsure what's going on. He shifts his position in the chair as he watches the two of them arguing with each other.  
Sonny raises an eyebrow and sighs as the rest of the room all sit quiet. It's awkwardly uncomfortable. Brock and Trent look at each other then down at the floor. They know that there's a storm brewing and they want to stay out of it.

"Well, where shall I start?" Jason continues his rant, staring at her "The fact the intel is basic, is an understatement." he sighs " And the HVT, not to mention _you_..." he sneers "...are out of our immediate reach on the ground. We have _no_ intel as to where they're taking these women and we have no way to find the HTV should this all go to shit."

He grinds his teeth to curb his anger, as they continue glaring at each other "And my gut, it's telling me that we're missing something here. So no, no as far as I'm concerned, this is not happening. I'm not putting BRAVO up for it"

"Your gut?!" she laughs "Oh yeah, yeah cos you know it's been so long I forgot. Jason Hayes, proven instinct, his gut!" she makes gestures with her hands in the air "or should I say his ego?! Which, knows better than all the intel, right?" Her dislike for him is more than obvious as they face off across the table.

Blackburn looks at Mandy and they both sigh before Mandy leans in and whispers to Eric "Is this really such a good idea?"

"I told you, this... _this_ is _not_...happening, you need to get that!" he's fuming now " I .. am ... _not,_ putting Bravo up for this mission. Can you get that in your thick head?"

Mandy speaks up "Jason, listen. The HTV will carry a tracker, the car will be fitted with GPS trackers, and we will equip the Lieutenant with, not only, a remote tracker but we have a subdermal one"

Mandy's statement causes CJ to swiftly look around at her "You'll what?" she frowns

Sonny sniggers out loud, as he and Ray look at each other smiling "Oh CJ, you know what she means? She means like the ones you fit dogs with." he laughs "Yeah well I guess, it's the same thing with you really."

"Oh, shut the fuck up, Sonny!" CJ turns, snapping at his comment " You think you're so funny! Well let me tell you, you're not." Jason stifles his laugh, smirking as he looks at Sonny. But his grin from the comment soon drops as she quickly turns on him "Really? You find his comment funny do you? So, tell me then, Master Chief Hayes, when has it become acceptable for one of _YOUR_ team to insult a senior officer, in a briefing?"

Jason purses his lips. That comment stings. She makes him so mad, but Sonny gave her the opportunity to pull him up and now he could swing for her. Unfortunately, hitting a senior officer in a briefing, wouldn't be acceptable either. He lets out a long sigh as he looks at Sonny and rolls his eyes.

Sonny smiles he knows his comment has crossed the line "Oh I'm Sorry. Look, I'll apologize ...Lieutenant. I mean, I'd hate for you to think I meant it to be derogatory..." then in hushed tone under his breath " ..to dogs"

Brock smiles and pats Cerberus who's still under the table, as they all try not to laugh.

Davis can feel the tension and tries to intervene as she speaks up "Master Chief Hayes" she's hoping to calm the situation "We also have ISR which will follow once the convoy is underway, so we will have eyes on them for most of the route"

"Davis sure loves her toys" Sonny winks as he laughs. While Davis tries to hide her blush as she smiles.

Blackburn steps in now to calm things down "Master Chief, I need to make it clear to you, this ...this operation, it _is_ happening. This gentleman has been green lit from the highest ranks. Special Secretary, Ambassador Dubois, is a high-profile target. One Washington is very keen to ensure gets to complete her diplomatic mission, _without_ incident. It's hoped any potential intel we can get from this means that we will have more chance of securing the release of the other hostages"

"Oh, I see now." Jason laughs "This came from Washington? They give the green lit, is that right? Now I get it.. now I get why it's her." Jason turns on his heels to face CJ, eye to eye "You been pulling some strings, have you?"

"Me!?" she frowns. She incredulous "Don't blame me. The first I knew of this was today, after I arrived."

"Yeah sure. So, you just _happen_ to get attached to this out of what, nowhere?"

She sighs frustrated by him "Not that it's your pay grade, but I've actually been trying to get go on something bigger than this, with Delta! This is from elsewhere. It's not my doing. Unfortunately, my intel got comp'd and now it seems, I got dumped with _YOU_ instead. Like I said, not my choice."

They really are arguing now, and Ray's had enough. He stands up "Alright, break it up children!" he looks at Blackburn "Commander, I think we all need some time out."

Blackburn nods " I agree Senior Chief, let's all take a break." He lets out a long and frustrated sigh as he looks at his watch. "We'll meet back in an hour"

Sonny sniffs the air, glaring at CJ "Works for me. Something seriously stinks in in here anyway"

C.J snaps back at him again "Oh Sonny, do you ever give it a rest? You know you're a joke, right?" she stares at him "I'll never understand how the hell you make a tier one. I mean look at you."

She and Sonny are now standing just inches apart, staring at each other. Sonny smirks. looking her up and down "I'm a joke?" he laughs "That coming from you, that is funny" He sneers, biting hard on his tooth pick she's really got him fired up now "Well, you know what honey? I guess, just no matter how hard you keep tryin', you'll never find out about being a tier one, right?"

He really hits a nerve with her there, and being honest, as soon as it's out of his mouth he regrets it. But he can't and he won't take it back, not to her.

She grinds her teeth and purses her lips and he can see how mad he's made her. So can Ray, and he shoves him hard, towards the doorway "Too far Brother, you know that. Sonny, you're not doing yourself any favors, with comments like that."

He's made her fuming mad and they all know the reasons he's pushed it too far. That it's a sore subject with her. They know how far she went to try to change the rules, that she pushed so hard to be allowed to try out for DEVGRU. They also know that she probably could have made the standard but that she got knocked back by the system and red tape every time. She pushed boundaries all of her career to be the best at what she did, but with this one thing she could never win because it wasn't in her control.

Sonny 's annoyed as well. Knowing he allowed her to push his buttons and frustrate himself that in the end he just got petty " _Urggghh!_ I know..I know, it's just... she gets me every damn time." As he leaves, he turns and looks at her. And though he doesn't say it, his face does apologise.

Clay follows Ray and Sonny out of the door. He also stops to look at C.J before leaving.

Blackburn calls out, clicking his fingers at Jason and CJ "You two wait there!"

C.J stops at the door. She can feel a lecture coming. Jason's still swinging in his chair, bouncing the dog ball.

"Right heads up you two. This needs to work!"  
His statement is short and sharp as he stares at them both "This _is_ happening. So, you two need to sort your differences because I have top brass chewing my ass on this. I can't have this continuous bickering. because that's not helping anyone" he looks at them both again "So, you both need to get on the same page and make it up. ASAP! Can you do that, yes or no?." he raises an eyebrow, his face questioning them both.

There's an awkward silence for a few moments, and then CJ answers first "Yeah, sure fine." she sighs "I mean, it weren't me with the attitude anyway"

Jason laughs. He takes a deep breath, trying not to react. Naturally he doesn't want to back down, but the look on Blackburn's face says he doesn't have much choice "Fine! Sure. Yes, I can play nice for the suits" He twists his hat around and glares at C.J "But this...this is not done, by a long shot"

He gets up from his seat and pushes past her in the doorway. Then instead of holding the door for her he slams it behind him. She laughs as she stands in front of the, now, closed door. She knows him well enough to be unsurprised by his attitude. She rolls her eyes and sighs "Well, that went well!"

As C.J closes the door, Blackburn lets out a long sigh. He looks at Mandy, and they're both thinking the same thing. "I'm not sure this was the best of ideas."

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

C.J saunters down to the canteen for a coffee. Clay's waiting at the corner of the corridor "What the _hell_ is going on?" he frowns

She looks furtively around, checking no one can see them "You're asking _me_!" she sighs "Oh my god are you serious? What about you? _YOU_ said you were a Gym instructor!"

He coughs awkwardly "Yeah, well obviously you know the reason for that now. But...but you never said you were Navy either. You said..." he shakes his head in disbelief ".. secretary, _Lieutenant!_ "

She sighs, running her hand over her face, frustrated. They both know the reasons they lied, it was the downside to their jobs, that they couldn't be honest.

C.J looks around, again making sure they're not overheard "Look Clay, you can't mention a word to anyone, I mean about us. Me and you and what's gone on. You have to keep quiet. This is really bad."

"Oh really? Do you think I'm stupid?"

"Seriously Clay." she stares at him " _No one_ , not even in Bravo can know. Please Clay, you can't say a word. It's just for the best"

"Sure.." he frowns ".. I understand. I know it's against rules, you're an officer, I get that, just... " he's frustrated "I know okay!"

"Yeah, but ... it's not just any rules, there are other issue so it's just better in no one knows" she smiles at him. Seeing him like this after this morning, it's really confusing.

Ray heads around the corner, almost walking into them. He holds back as he watches them deep in conversation, wondering what's going on but CJ spots him standing there and she straightens her stance "Hey, what's up Ray? Long-time no see" she smiles nervously.

"Hey CJ! Everything okay here?"

"Yeah, yeah we were...we were just doing introductions, you know, we hadn't met before. We were just saying about how bad the traffic was today"

"Ah okay" Ray frowns, something about their body language makes him feel uneasy "You wanna get something to eat?"

" Yeah, yeah sure." she smiles as they both follow him towards the canteen.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

When they reach the busy eating area, CJ peels off from their company, as they join the rest of Bravo at the table. She knows she won't be welcome, especially with Sonny there.

She sighs, watching them as she pours a coffee, wondering quite how they're going to overcome the tension for this spin up.

She's deep in thought it's frustrating that the atmosphere has to be like this as she knows, they won't get a better female operator to accompany them, she also knows that Jason knows that, despite his dislike for her.

Blackburn heads into the canteen he leans on the table "Okay people, just to say there's no reason to come back to the briefing room, I've just had word... we're green lit to go. Wheels up in 14hrs get yourselves together"

"Hell! " Sonny frowns "How about we ditch the coffee and grab a couple of beers then." Sonny rubs his hands.

Jason nods "Seems good to me."

Clay sighs as he watches Davis, she's talking to CJ. They're chatting by the coffee machine "Hey, what about Davis, and the Lieutenant, you inviting them?"

Sonny frowns, then lets out a loud whistle "Davis! Get your butt over here. We're going for beers" Davis smiles, putting her hand up as she acknowledges him.

"Sonny, aren't you going to ask the Lieutenant?" Clay frowns

"Nope!" Sonny snaps his reply, without hesitation.

"What?" he frowns "But...I mean, it's not right, to leave her out. I mean, it would be good to get to know her, don't you think? Before we go."

Sonny laughs, shaking his head "Oh, I already know her and trust me poster boy, you do _not_ want to get to know her. The best thing for everyone, would be if she stays here. No actually ...the best thing, that would be for her to fuck off back to Washington" he sighs "Hey Clay, don't you worry your pretty little head about her. She'll be just fine. You can count on that." He ruffles Clay's hair. He can see the concern in his face "Clay, seriously, don't you go getting fairy dust in your eyes, over that one. She'll eat you alive and spit you out. Just like everyone else she deals with"  
Sonny hoists him up out of his seat. "Davis, c'mon, we're headin' off!"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

As the others all leave the seating area, Jason looks over his shoulder at CJ. She's now sitting alone with her coffee and he feels a sudden pang of guilt "Hey guys, I'll catch up with you. Just head to the bar"

Ray catches his arm "Jace, you okay brother?"

"Yeah! Yeah Ray I'll be fine." he sighs a long deep breath "Look, I just need to try and mend some fences, if this thing is on" Ray frowns, concerned "Ray, it's fine, honestly."

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

C.J looks up from her coffee at Jason's standing over the table. He's leaning on his knuckles staring at her. She smiles. She'd forgotten, how much of a big presence he was in the flesh.

He reluctantly returns her smile "You um... you not coming for a beer?"

"Jason seriously?" she laughs "You asking me?" she frowns "And you've run that past your guard dog first, right?" indicating towards the doorway "I mean, I'm not so sure that I was on Sonny's beer buddy list, not the last time I checked anyway"

"Hey, c'mon, Sonny will be fine. I'll talk to him. Get him to stop with the wise cracks" he nods for her to get up "Just one, for old time sake then. Let bygones be bygones and all that "

She laughs at him, standing up "Oh that's classic Jason. Just classic you." she throws her coffee in the bin and walks away, shaking her head amused by his comment.

"CJ... Oh c'mon. Give me a break!" Jason throws his hands up, rubbing his head "Oh why the hell did I even bother?!" He heads to the door "Jeez, I need a beer"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: This shouldn't have happened

Chapter Text

Clay can't relax. The guys are drinking but he's just pulling the label off his beer bottle thinking, he looks around noticing that Jason walks in alone.  
He's disappointed but Ray and Sonny are relieved.

"Hey boss. We got you a beer in. The Lieutenant not coming?" Clay questions

"Hey, GQ! I told you, forget about her" Sonny takes a sip of his beer then mutters under his breath "Two timing slut" he leans forward and pushes another beer towards Clay.

Even Jason's annoyed at the constant comments "Sonny enough now!"

"Well truth is truth. You know that." he shrugs " Anyways, how'd we get landed with her?"  
Brock nudges Sonny to look towards the doorway as C.J walks in alone "Oh hell! I spoke too soon. Looks like she's made her way here, just to put me off my beer, no doubt." 

C.J orders a whiskey shot and beer as she sits on the stool at the bar, away from the others.

Jason smiles at her as she looks over, surprising himself that he's actually pleased that she decided to come. Clay smiles as well. She just looks at her beer and ignores them. 

"Whiskey shots?!" Sonny announces rubbing his hands

"Steady Sonny. We're up in a 11hrs" Jason reminds him

"Hell yeah, plenty of time then" As Clay gets up from his seat calls to him " Hey Blondie, sit your butt back down. We're doing shots first, so no leaving the party this early"

"Just using the men's room"

"Or in your case..." Sonny laughs "..the little boys' room"

Clay heads to the door. When he walks past C.J he whispers to her "Meet me outside" She smiles at him but doesn't answer.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Clay whistles. He's hiding around the corner, behind the garbage store. It's in a secluded area behind the bar, hidden away from main view of the parking lot.

"We should not be out here together." she smiles, as checks around making sure they are alone "The others will be missing you." She gives him one of her sexy smiles "So, what can I do for you Mr Spenser, because we are taking a hell of a risk being here"

"Yeah but see, I've always loved the element of risk. It's actually part of my job" he smiles as he pushes her back against the wall. "And as for what you can do for me, I'll show you"

He quickly unbuttons her shirt, kissing down her neck into her breast. "Oh God!" She lets out a breathless sigh, as each delicate kiss turns her on. "Clay...this is a hell of a risk we're taking."

"I know." he smiles. "But so worth it!" The risk is what's making them both so excited and in the urgency of the moment he hoists up her skirt. He smiles "I just want you so much."  
He's pulling at the lace trim on the top of her panties putting his hand inside "Do you know how great you looked in that briefing room this morning?" She smiles, putting her hand to the bulge in the front of his pants feeling how turned on he is, as he carries on sucking and kissing her breast. Then taking hold of his head she brings his lips back up to hers.  
" _Mmmm!_ Oh Clay, I want you so bad" she's looking him full in the face, her heavy breathing taking over from her words "Clay...if we get caught" she shakes her head. She has serious doubts about doing this, but sex outside, it excites her so much " _Hmmm!"_

" _Shhh!_ Just relax. We won't get caught"  
He kisses her neck as he unbuckles his pants. Sliding her panties to one side so that he can take her without removing them. The tug of the material against her delicate area sends a wave of tingles through her body that add to the pleasure. He unbuttons the rest of her shirt exposing her breasts to the air, while he carries on kneading them, firmly with his hand. She takes a deep breath, hitching her leg around his waist, steadying herself against the damp brick wall behind. __

_"Aahhhhh!"_ she gasps, biting her lip, as he pushes himself deep inside her. _"Ahhh!... Clay!_ " She knows this is so wrong, but it's so worth the risk and excitement.

He cums way too quickly for her pleasure. This is all too much for him to hold, and as he relaxes she smiles thanking him with lots of kisses. She just wishes they'd had more time as it's over too quickly for her to get any satisfaction.  
He couldn't take his eyes off her in that briefing, and finding out she's was an officer as well. Well that was a big turn on for him and there was no way he was going to be able to wait until they got back from operations.

He fastens the buckle on his pant. "I need to head back or I'm gonna be missed"  
He kisses her before pulling away from her grasp,turning to go. He feels bad just abandoning her like this, but thats part of the trade-off for the quick outside sex.

"Okay!" C.J makes a sad face. She might be an officer but in Clay's company she likes the feeling of him taking charge. "I'll um... see you on the flight in a few hours"

He can't resist her and comes back for another kiss. He loves touching her body and has one last feel putting his hand inside, her still open, shirt. The feel of her breast on his hand makes him so tempted to fuck her again but they know that would be pushing the risk too far.

She looks at him deep in the eyes and he can see the want for him in her face. She's still really turned on and she doesn't want to let him go, but eventually she concedes and pushes him away "Clay go!"

Straightening her clothes and slowly fastening the buttons on her shirt, she smiles. Taking a deep breath out deeply she releases some of her frustration, calming herself. Then brushing her hair back from her face, she takes a moment to get a grip on herself, before heading back into the bar behind him.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Ray and Jason are at the bar getting more beer and chasers. Jason looks around checking the bar "Did C.J leave?"

Ray's unsure but he hopes so. Although, now Jason says that, he's also notices that Clay's gone as well "Yeah guess so. There was no reason for her to stay. You know, I'm gonna head back soon. Spend some time with the kids before we get spun up" 

Ray puts the beers down on table "Where's poster boy? I ordered him whisky shots" Sonny announces "He's been gone a while, he better not have left"

"Yeah where is Spenser?" Jason frowns

"Men's room, I think" Ray looks around hoping that's where he is

"He got a problem down there. Apart from finding it I mean."

Sonny was right, he had been gone a while and Ray frowns concerned.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Clay's back in the bar, still adjusting his clothes. Ray notices. He also notices that back too.

"Whiskey" she demands from the bartender

Ray gets up from the table looking as Clay stands drinking his beer "I'll get the shots, Clay you sit down. I'm gonna head back home now anyway"

"I'll take eight whiskey shots!" Ray orders. He looks around then leans in to speak to C.J "I'm sorry about Sonny. You know, I'll have a word, get him to tone it down"

"You'll have a word?" C.J looks at him out the corner of her eye "Don't, not on my account anyway. Ray, I'm a big girl and I can handle Sonny"

"Still, he doesn't need to talk to you the way he does"  
He looks behind to check that no one can overhear their conversation "Look I'm sorry for everything. I know you've had to take a lot of shit for the situation"

"It's not a problem" she dismisses his comments and drinks her beer "We both know why he says what he does. It's fine."

"But, I am sorry. If it could be any other way, then..."

She laughs and shakes her head "Oh you're Sorry?! What the hell. Yeah, I bet you are!"  
She can't believe he's actually saying this now after all this time "Sorry for _what_ exactly Ray? Sorry that you get to play happy families while I'm the two-timing tramp or sorry you didn't come clean and have had to live with the guilt of what we did? What Ray? What exactly are you sorry about? Guess this doesn't sit well, what with you being a man of God" she mocks him.

Rays annoyed now " _Shhh!_ will you keep your voice down. Look, what we did, it was a huge mistake. And yes... yes, I regret it and I regret that you had to take the shit, and that I had to lie to Jason"

She smirks and laughs "Oh it's okay Ray." she gives him a pitying look "You don't need to worry, I'm never gonna tell anyone what happened if that's what you're worried about me being here. I mean I wouldn't want to upset your holier than thou life and your _boring_ wife."

Ray looks at her "You know sometimes I feel sorry for you, but then... then you act like this. I give up trying to be nice to you, CJ. Sonny's right, you're just a poisonous bitch" He bites his lip and shakes his head; his tone turns nasty "You know what fuck you C.J, do what you want. You usually do!"  
He picks up the tray of shots from the bar and walks away.

"Yep! Cheers Ray!" She raises her beer bottle "That's exactly what you did." She sighs as she looks at the barman "Give me another whiskey."  
She rubs her head with her hand "You know what, actually, forget it. I'm getting out of this place."

"Damn!" She sighs again. Angry with herself wishing she hadn't said that to Ray. After all it wasn't his fault they treat her the way they do. No, he was just the wrong person, in the wrong place at that time. And he has a wife he loves, his kids and it wouldn't do anyone any good if the whole sorry saga came out in the open.

She decides it's time to leave and collect her gear "Long day tomorrow!"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

 ** Military base airfield **

Jason and CJ are side by side loading their equipment onto the C-17. Neither of them has spoken a word and you could cut the atmosphere with a knife 

"You left early last night? " Jason finally breaks the silence

"Just made sense. Early start. Long day" she snaps back, not even looking at him.

"C'mon C.J! Give me a break, please. I'm trying here" he frowns at her " What do you want from me?"

"What do I want? Nothing. I don't want anything from you, Jason." She walks away not even looking back at him.

"FUCK!" He slams his fist down on the box in front of him, shaking his head. In frustration he lets out a long sigh "Well, I tried!"

 ** On Route C-17 Flight to Nigeria un-named airbase **

Davis is monitoring communications of well-known Nigerian terror organizations on the laptop in front of her "Heads up guys. New chat room just came live. Looks like a group we haven't seen before"

She watches the screen looking at the conversations "They're talking about a target, on route'" Davis taps away on her other laptop "So it looks like Intel could be correct. I just checked the Ambassadors flight, just took off from New York. So, timing on their intel ties up"

"Alright.." Blackburn looks at his watch "we land in ... two hours, so let's get some rest. Davis, keep monitoring that and let me know ASAP if anything develops"

"Yes Sir!"

Sitting in the makeshift beds they have at the back of the planem C.J and Clay are discretely flirting with each other. She's being a lot more careful than him to make sure the others don't catch on. But what she's failed to notice is Ray, who's cleaning his weapon, watching them. He's already suspicious of the way they are around each other he's been watching their body language closely.

She's eating an orange and flirtatiously teasing Clay, licking the juice from her fingers "I need to wash my hands" she smiles "They're sticky"

Clay yawns and stretches as he gets out of his hammock and he follows her. But as he stands up and moves Ray's there in his way blocking his path. "Hey brother how's it going?"

"Good thanks" Clay frowns wondering why Ray acting so oddly. He tries to step around him, but again he blocks his exit. "You know if there's anything you need to talk about you can talk to me, right? You do know that?" he raises an eyebrow "About Stella ... or anything else"

"Sure, but there's not" Clay's smiles, he's slightly confused. "You okay Ray? Sorry but you're not making much sense. I mean I appreciate the thought but I don't have anything worrying me."

"Okay that's good then. Um... you two seem to hitting it off" he nods towards C.J. It now dawns on Clay what Ray's implying.  
Ray still stares him in the eyes "You sure there's not _anything,_ you wanna talk about?" he pauses watching Clay, giving him an opportunity to say something "Look Clay, just be very careful there. Playing games with her, trust me when I say it can get rough."

Clay looks around to check who might over hear their conversation. He gives a moment's thought, thinking hard about what C.J said about not telling anyone about them. "Look Ray you're a good listener, a friend. Hell we're brothers, right!" he coughs nervously "Look, it's just fooling around, nothing more.I um... I didn't know who she was at the start. We just met in a bar, things went a little bit further. But its good, it's under control."

Ray shakes his head and rolls his eyes "Clay! You need to end this...like now!"

"Hey don't worry!" he smiles, reassuringly patting Ray on the shoulder "It's okay. I've got it in control. It's just a bit of fun"

Ray bites his lip. Though he guessed this was going on, he had hoped it wasn't true "Clay, you're out of your depth there. You really don't know what you're getting in to. Trust me _it_ needs to end!"

Clay smiles and slaps him on the arm again "I said don't worry. Ray, it's all cool! I know what I'm doing."

"I'm serious brother" Ray shakes his head "You don't know her. She's fire and you _WILL_ get burned on this. Believe me."

"You worry too much." Clay laughs "Like I said, it's all in control" he nods, trying to reassure Ray as he heads over to C.J

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Sonny caught the end of the conversation and he frowns looking at Ray "Everything okay with Blondie there?"

"Yeah sure" Ray takes worried breath in "I was just giving him some friendly advice"

"You think maybe he's in trouble?"

"Maybe.." Ray shrugs "l don't know, it's hard to tell. He says he's got it in control but...he's young and reckless. He doesn't see the consequences, and he definitely underestimates the trouble she'll can cause him!"

Sonny nods taking on board what Ray's telling him "You want me to have a word with the problem? Make her go away."

"No! No, not yet let's just see how it plays out"

"Okay! But you only gotta say the word, and I'm on to fixing her. That would be my pleasure"

"No Sonny, let's just try keep the drama to minimum for now. Last thing we need is for Jason to get wind!"

"Okay, whatever you say Ray. But just give me the nod if you think she needs putting back in her box"

Ray shakes his head, he smiles "We're good for now brother!" There is something disturbing about Sonny's willingness to fix _that_ particular problem.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

 ** At the BRAVO Command HQ - Nigeria **

"Davis what we got?" Blackburn's leaning over her shoulder looking at the screen while Mandy is monitoring another chat room on the other laptop.

"So far Sir, there's no further intel. We do have the schedule for today, though."

"Okay, let's hear it"

"Lieutenant Lewis will meet Ambassador Dubois at the Central Hotel. From there they'll leave 11 :00 hours following the pre arranged route, to the Nigerian UN Office. ETA one hour for the journey. Escort convoy is in place"

Davis looks around to see who's listening then continues "Lieutenant will accompany her. Cover is Personal Assistant. Dubois has a security detail made up of four, privately UN funded security personnel. From initial intel checks that particular detail is headed up by an ex UK special forces operative, Brent Reagan. He was brought in a few weeks back from US end in Washington to oversee the visit" she pauses again for any input

"Security all check out? " Blackburn frowns as he he looks at the reports in the files.

"Yeah, as far as we can tell." Mandy nods "As Davis says, he was brought in from a Washington source"

Davis continues "They'll travel on to the UN Office. Any attempt to intercept them along the route and we're set to step in. We will extract the HTV and Lieutenant. ISR is ready to monitor the route. This allows for an additional trace if anything goes wrong"

She pauses again and looks around as Blackburn. Jason and Mandy are now focused and listening "Trackers are in place on HVT main vehicle and the ambassador will be given a remote tracker before they leave. Trent's going to sort the one Lieutenant Lewis is having fitted. Obviously subdermal as we know tend to be little more temperamental, it will require Wi-Fi or satellite backup, and at times it can have a limited range coverage but, it's a good back up"

"Bet CJ's loving that." Jason laughs "Mind I'm more worried for Trent while he does it, she does have a hell of a punch on her!"

Mandy smiles "Yeah, I can't say she looked overly keen."

"Okay..." Blackburn looks around "Davis any heads up from the chat rooms about location of possible take down points?"

"No Sir, everything has gone quiet for now"

"Okay, well keep monitoring that. Having that loCal will make this a lot easier" He looks up "in the meantime let's look a some possibles along this route. It's a busy city center route, so there can't be too many easily accessible points to hit a vehicle, for a snatch. If that's what they're planning"

"I think they'll let the convoy get outside city then hit. There's more spaces once they clear the city center"

Jason frowns "Let's just try and get this right. Cover all angles. We have no idea where they've taken any of those other hostages. We lose this trace we could lose everything, and our HVT"

"Your concern is noted" Blackburn nods at him "Last thing we wanna be doing is explaining the loss of an Ambassador, or...come to it letting _Washington_ know we've lost Lieutenant Lewis!" He and Jason explain awkward glances

"No, no that won't be good for anyone."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Wrapped in only a small towel C.J is getting her toiletries together. She has just showered and is now getting dressed in one of the side bathrooms at the temporary base they've arrived at in Nigeria.

She's still rubbing the back of her ear, it's sore from the tracker Trent inserted behind it earlier. She's trying hard not to touch it but the heat from the shower is making it itch. She grimaces as she catches it with her nail "Fuck! That hurts."

The towel she's wearing round her, barely covers her body, as she's reaching over her head, tying her ponytail, in front of the mirror. She stops at the sudden sound of a knock on the door. "Come in!" she shouts.

Jason puts his head around the door frame. He doesn't speak, pausing for a moment, while he watches her doing her hair. He can't help looking at her legs and can make out the fact that she's naked under the towel. He coughs, apologising for the intrusion "You Ready?"

He's calm, and they have an uneasy truce going on. She carries on tying her hair up as she looks at him in the reflection of the mirror and nods. "Yeah!"

"You okay?" He frowns, he can see she's frustrated by the way she's re tying her ponytail.

"Yeah sure why wouldn't I be?" She still looks at him through the reflection in the mirror rather than turn to face him. They stare at each other for a minute. "Jason..." she sighs. Stopping what she's doing "You've got my back right?" she questions him but her face showing some of her concerns.

Sensing her nervous tension, he steps into the room letting the door close. He's now standing behind her, looking at her in the mirror "Always" he nods "You know that. Hundred percent, no doubt." he smiles at her "CJ you know you can count on _all_ of BRAVO right? Even Sonny" he laughs

She nods. "Yeah, yeah I know. Just checking" She smiles, she does trust him on that. No matter the history of what's gone on in the past she still trusts him. Trusts that he'll keep her safe. "Yeah I know you'll make sure of it"  
As she keeps eye contact with him in the mirror she realises she's still only wrapped in the towel "You know you shouldn't be in here" she coughs awkwardly, still watching in the mirror as he looks at her

"I know" but he doesn't move and the two just stand there looking at each other. "I should go"

She turns slowly as she finishes tying her hair. She bites her lip thinking, looking him deep in the eyes. He smooths down a stray bit of hair at the front of her face. Then gently his hand touches her cheek. "Jason! Stop." She pulls her head away and lets out a long sigh.

He bites his lip, he's thinking about her, putting his hands either side of her body onto the countertop, trapping her there. He then leans in, brushing his lips against hers.  
"Jason, don't! " She sighs. It's a long time since she was this close to him but, it still feels nice "You need to go. This this can't happen, not now."  
She pulls back away from his touch, putting her hand on his chest to hold him back. He looks her in the eyes and they just stare at each other.

She takes a deep breath "Don't do this, I can't deal with it right now."  
There was a time when she would have done anything for him to stand here looking at her like this. Now? Now, too much water had travelled under the bridge and she leans back on the counter away from his touches watching him. The she rubs his cheek with the back of her hand, feeling the rough of his stubble her soft skin.

He closes his eyes to her touch, and she can see a tiredness in his face she's not seen before. "You okay?" she frowns as she watches him.

He takes hold of her hand to stop her. Brushing it gently with his kiss then her puts his hand on her cheek, gently caressing the side of her face. She nuzzles into his hand, wanting to respond to his touch so much but once again, she pulls it away.  
"Jason! Oh God, just... just stop!" she says it half-heartedly, as she feels a shiver in her body. A tingle of desire as he leans in to kiss her again. But, something keeps forcing her to pull away. "Ahhh! Oh god!"  
She tips her head back." Just don't, please!" Looking up she lets out a deep sigh. This is such a dilemma, it's so hard not to respond to his touch. Right now, she really wants him to touch her so badly "Jason, this can't happen!"

"No, but we both want it to."  
He kisses his lips against her exposed neck as she leans back letting him. They're trying to read each other and finally his touching wins out

"Yeah, yeah I do! But then you know that" she smiles, that tingle has become a wave of excitement and she gives in grabbing the back of his head pulling him in, kissing him. Willing him on to her she can't get enough of his lips, of his tongue in her mouth, she just wants him so much. Then realising the mistake, they are making she pulls back, putting her hands up "STOP! Okay, just STOP! This can't ..." changing her mind knowing this is wrong she pushes him back. "...this can't happen. Jason, you need to leave"

"Yeah you're right" he nods "It was my stupid mistake. I should go"

"Yeah" she nods "You should."

As he opens the door he turns looking at her and he can't leave. And instead of doing the right thing, he closes the door properly and turns the lock.

Then he's in front of her, at the sink, hoisting her up, sitting her on the counter.

 _"Oh SHIT!"_ She's frantically undoing his khakis, balancing herself, parting her legs and leaning back on her arms as he frantically trusts the whole of his hardness inside her. He's kissing her neck, watching himself in the mirror. Doing what he's been thinking about doing since he first saw her again. Giving into the desire he has for her.

She's breathing fast and deeply now as she groan. "Oh SHIT!...oh,ohhhh!"  
She moans, as he thrusts hard against her. Taking the power from each motion he makes. She loves it. Loves that he's so strong and that he fucks her with all of his strength, wanting her so much

"Oh god... I've missed this so much!" All the lost time, the lust and all the history between them just come flooding back in this unadulterated fuck. Because that all this is just a needy fuck. She knows it's two people who've been kept apart releasing the tension between them.

He pushes inside her, grinding against her, lost in his own head as he fucks her so hard. They're both lost in the now, in this single moment. They're not thinking about any consequences of these actions. Then nearly it's over and they both let out a long sigh, both groaning, panting hard as their bodies relax.

She catches her breath and relaxes. Stretching her aching arms, from steadying herself on the counter. _"Pheww! Oh ..my God!"_ she lets out a breathless gasp and smiles at him.

"Hey..." she holds his face making him look at her "are you alright?" she smiles but he doesn't smile back.

He's looking at himself in the mirror "This was a mistake!...Shit!" he rubs his head and sighs "What the hell were we thinking?" He shakes his head as he pulls back and zips his pants up. He lets out another massive sigh, rubbing his hand on his forehead and through his hair. He's annoyed with himself for doing this "You were right..." he says looking at her "We should never have let this happen"

"What?.. Jason..." She looks up at him frowning and questioning "What? Why are you saying that? Jason, don't be like this." She puts her hand on his face, but he dismisses her touch, brushing her away as he steps back to the door. "Jason! Oh my god, don't do this. Not now, not when we just... Jason!" she frowns angrily. She feels so used by him.

He unlocks the door, glancing back he shakes his head. Then coldly he answers her "Just be ready to leave at 08:00"

He walks out letting the door close behind him. She's stunned and sits there a moment just staring at the door. Then her anger builds, and she throws the bottle off the side at the closed door "Fuck you Jason!" She takes a deep breath, rubbing her hand on her forehead as her eyes start to fill with tears "Jesus Christ... you bastard!"

o-o-o-o-o-o

As he steps into the light of the corridor he lets out a massive sigh _Pheww!_ He closes his eyes as leaning his forehead on the wall opposite the bathroom. He can hear her swearing and shouting from behind the closed door. bathroom. "SHIT!" He slams his hand, hard, against the wall several times. Annoyed with his own behaviour "Shit, shit! Not good Jason! Goddamnit"

Ray's in the corridor. He's seen him come out of the shower room. He's only guessing that him and C.J have had words. The alternative doesn't cross his mind "Hey Jace, brother...you okay?" He's concerned when Jason doesn't answer watching him slam the wall again ""Jace...what the hell's happened? You okay man. Has she said something?" he's really concerned now; he's not seen him this angry for a long time.

"Leave it Ray, just leave it" Jason stares at him before he storms off shaking his head, still swearing to himself.

Ray's confused. He waits for a moment, looking at the closed shower room door. He wonders if he should he check if she's okay but as he bites his lip and puts his fist against it to knock he changed his mind and decides it might be best to stay out of it.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Staring at the closed door she can't believe she just let that happened. She lets out a long sigh _"Pheww!"_ then closing her eyes, she swallows hard trying not to choke on the emotional lump in her throat and she puts her hand to her mouth to stifle her cries.

She's breathing hard, still sitting up on the countertop, choking back her tears. "What the hell!" she takes another deep breath "Oh my god, Jason you...bastard!" she screams. Then calming herself she drops down from the counter to just staring at herself in the in the mirror. _Oh, you idiot CJ!_  
She's rubbing her head shaking. _How could you be so stupid again!_

She leans with her hands on the counter with her head back closing her eyes trying to get her emotions in check. Then rubbing her head with both hands, she pulls at her ponytail making it tighter. Running tap and washing her face with cold water, trying hard to stop herself crying.

She swallows hard. She's angry and embarrassed "Why the hell did you let that happen. I said I could deal with seeing him. Oh god! Why didn't you say no and stop this? You knew he'd hurt you again" But she didn't stop it because truth is she didn't want to. But she also knows she should have.

She takes a deep breath to composes herself. "Okay! Time to focus. You've got a job to do. Priorities" she rubs her ear again "Awww! Shit! Fuuuckck!"

There's another knock on the door and she looks up from where she's getting dressed. It's Commander Blackburn "You ready to go Lieutenant?"

She composes her tearful voice to stop it cracking "Yup-just finishing up here, then I'm set to go!"

"Lieutenant, are you okay?" Blackburn asks, he's not sure that she sounds alright

"Yeah sure. I'm coming now"

"Okay, we have ten minutes to briefing"

"Sure" she's still trying not to cry _"Oh God... get it together"_ she tells herself staring at her reflection in the mirror. She couldn't be angrier with herself, or Jason, but she has to let it go for now.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She's the last to enter the briefing room, fiddling with her ear which is still sore from the tracker. Trent notices as he looks around the room as she enters. He quietly whispers "You need to leave that, or you'll make it worse"

She ignores him, frowning as she continues to rub her ear on her shoulder.

Clay sees her grimace and mouths to her "Are you okay?"

She ignores him too.

Ray is giving her stares, which she also ignores and there's Jason. He has his arms folded and he looks around at her as she enters the room, but he completely ignores her.

She sighs to herself, wondering if it's too late to pull out of this operation "Shit! This is gonna be some spin up!"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

 **Central First Hotel Nigeria **

They arrives at the hotel with the U.N ambassador General and she's introduced to Ambassador Dubois "So, do they really think I need a personal bodyguard with all these guys as well?"

"Hopefully not" CJ smiles at her "but um...there are some places these guys can't go, and I'm a personal assistant, not bodyguard."

"So, are we ready to go ladies?"

The English voice behind them piques her interest and she looks up "Yeah um... I just need a minute. I need the ladies' room before we go" C.J replies. She really needs to do a quick comm check with BRAVO without making anyone aware.

"Ambassador Dubois, could you put this in a comfortable location about your person" Reagan give her a nice friendly smile

"What is it?"

"it's um ... a tracker! Just in case... you were to get separated from us, which is not likely to happen, but um...if it did we can locate you" he smiles again trying to reassure her

"Doesn't she need one?" she refers to C.J

"Um...no!" he looks at CJ and smiles "They are called um... Target Trackers. We give them to the ..." he stops and smiles awkwardly. C.J she closes her eyes her face saying how she doesn't consider this very reassuring "..to the um... person that needs them"

She looks at the English guy, as he gives her another of his smarmy smiles. Whilst an English accent has been a turn on for her in the past, there is something about this guy she doesn't like. He doesn't feel right, but she can't put her finger on what it is and strangely, she thinks she knows him from somewhere.

As she stands looking in the mirror in the ladies' bathroom, located in the lobby of the hotel. She quietly checks in. "Okay, here we go then!" she says to herself composing herself in the mirror "Bravo 1, this is lone wolf do you copy"

"This is one...good copy Lone Wolf"  
Jason sighs to himself, he's now full of regret as he speaks to her, about the way he treated her. But for now, they're in work mode and so all those feelings are put on hold as they do their jobs.

"HAVOC do you copy?"

"This is HAVOC. Good copy "

"HAVOC can I get an intel check on this Brent Reagan. Copy "

Davis picks up the mic and replies "Is there a problem? He checked out okay on initial checks. Honorary discharge, ex special forces, handgun & weapons specialist. He has long skill set. But is basically, now a gun for hire. Nothing flagged on the report. He's been with the Ambassador for a few weeks now. Was a special request from a security dept in Washington Copy"

"This is Bravo one. CJ, what's the problem? copy"

"Bravo 1, Nothing I guess. Just a feeling that's all. I feel like I know him from somewhere but can't place it. I'm leaving this comm line on open mic, copy?"

"This is HAVOC copy that"

Sonny laughs, sneering to Ray "She's probably fucked him and can't remember!"

Jason immediately turns on him "Sonny shut up the hell up! She can hear you. Just do what you're here for."

Ray shakes his head at Sonny "Don't go there, not today brother"

Sonny shrugs "As if I care what she thinks. He holds his mic to his mouth, smiling as he speaks directly into it knowing she can hear him "She's drunken tramp and she knows it"

Jason glares at him." Can we just be professional for one day!"

"Hey whats eatin' you?" Sonny rolls his eyes. "Sure thing. But doesn't change facts"

Jason sighs "Copy that. C.J it's your call. You wanna pull this? If somethings spooked you, just give the word and we'll pull it"

"No. No, it's probably nothing... just a feeling I have. Will proceed. I'll update with a sit rep"

"HAVOC this is Bravo 1. Can we background check that again, copy"?

"Bravo 1 copy that" Davis knows shes done her checking but she will do as she's asked.

Davis turns to Blackburn and Mandy "That chat room just opened up" Davis turns looking at Mandy and Blackburn. She frowns at the opening chatter "PACKAGE IS READY FOR COLLECTION."

Blackburn swings round and looks at the monitor "Okay, keep eyes on it" he gets on the comms "BRAVO 1 this is HAVOC. heads up we have chatter our end"

"This is BRAVO 1. okay keep us in loop with sitrep" he looks around at Ray and Sonny "Okay keep your heads up be ready. HAVOC comm check BRAVO 1 Copy"

"Bravo1 Copy. HAVOC out"

"HAVOC this is lone Wolf. Stand by. We're proceeding from the lobby"

"Copy that"

The UN party depart outside the hotel to the steps and wait for the official car to arrive in front of them.  
The security detail is waiting with them but C.J is feeling apprehensive. She looks around as Reagan keeps smiling at her. Her experience tells her there's something wrong and she can feel a real tension in the air which she doesn't like. She takes a deep breath with nothing concrete to go on there's _Nothing you can do right now!_

"It's time to go ladies" Reagan smiles as he ushers them down the main step toward the waiting vehicle. As he smiles at her again, he gives her this look which gives her a really bad feeling. She stops where she is on the steps, hesitating. "You know what I think we need to go back!"

"Sorry, it's too late Ms Lewis!" he smiles pulling a gun from his waistband.

There's a loud crack and a bang as the sound of a Gunshot rings out over the comms. Everyone goes silent for a few moments as they try to assess what's happened.

Blackburn swings around from the monitor "Davis get me eyes up! I need to know what's going on. Bravo One this is HAVOC do you have a sitrep?"

"ISR is up. Images downloading" Davis swings into full operational mode

"This is BRAVO One. We have a target down. Repeat .. target down"  
Jason's adrenaline is pumping "HAVOC it's going down at the Hotel. They going to take her at the leave point not on route All Bravo call signs standby"

"Lone wolf copy... Lone wolf copy ... C.J...copy!" He panics at the silence from the comms her end. "SHIT!" he's really concerned now "HAVOC this is BRAVO One. Have you got eyes on our target?"

"images just up ISR shows one unknown down. Looks like HVT is being removed. We need a Stop on that vehicle"

Blackburn takes over the comms from Davis "BRAVO One Execute extraction of HVT NOW! Copy"

"BRAVO One Copy that HAVOC" Jason focuses himself "All BRAVO call signs, one unknown target down. HVT is priority. repeat HVT is priority. We need to take out that vehicle. Two and Four you on over watch" he bangs his orders out quickly "Six you with me to target. BRAVO 3 and 5 you're on the vehicle. Execute, execute, execute! "

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason and Clay are on the scene. Standing on the steps at the front of the hotel.

"This is BRAVO 3. We lost the target. Repeat we lost the vehicle. Copy"

"Copy that Three! ... SHIT!" Jason rubs his head, swinging around checking around while Clay checks the pulse on the body lying at the bottom of the steps. He gulps hard and shakes his head at Jason "She's gone!"

"SHIT! Shit!" he looks around, trying to make sense of what happened. Things are moving fast, and he has to get a grip on what's going on ""HAVOC copy this is BRAVO One"

"BRAVO One Copy Do you have a sitrep"

Jason puts his hand to his mouth and rubs his chin. He lets out a long sigh as he once again surveys the scene of the body in front of him "This just doesn't make any sense" he looks at Clay "HAVOC this is Bravo 1 the HVT is dead!"

"BRAVO 1. Say again your last!" Blackburn looks at Davis and frowns

"HAVOC I repeat... the HTV is dead, HTV is dead!"

Jason undoes his helmet and looks at Clay they both shake their heads "HAVOC ...They have the wrong target! COPY"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4: The wrong target**

 **Back at US Nigeria HQ - operation debrief**

"What the hell is going on here Mandy? What's with the Intel?" Jason raises his voice as he paces back and forth

"Jason, I'm working on ..."

Davis rushes into the room "Um...sorry to interrupt but I think you'll wanna see this." Davis links up the laptop to the main screen "That chat group we were monitoring, posted this before it went dark. _We have the unique package. Target secure'_

Jason furrows his eyes staring at it "So what does that mean? What,they think they still have their target?"

"We don't know." Davis shrugs,she's as confused as him " It doesn't make any sense but, it's the only explanation we can see. According to that post they think they still have the right target"

"So, you think that they think Lieutenant Lewis is Dubois?" Clay frowns, he's not understanding what's happened.

Jason looks up at Mandy "You got anything yet?"

She shakes her head "No sorry, I've got no idea but I'm still running some intel"

"Jesus! Nothing, you've got nothing? " he impatiently clicks his fingers at Davis "Play back that footage from the hotel CCTV"

"I can but, it's really poor quality. We couldn't get much off it" Davis warns him.

"Yeah, I know but it's the only thing we have. Get it up on screen" he sits forward to study it closer this time. As it plays through he indicates with his hand to play it again. "...and again"

"Jason...stop this." Mandy frowns after he has it played for the fifth time

"I said again!" he stares at it harder this time. Davis is right the picture quality is really poor like she said but he keeps re-watching the scene over and over "STOP! Look, there!.Reagan, watch him... there can you see?.Oh my god, how have we missed that?" He looks around at the room  
"The shot, look it came from him." he gets up pointing with his fingers "Look, handgun there. He makes the shot to Dubois, then gets in the vehicle"

"I'm confused then. Why would he shoot her? I mean he knew who she was" Davis frowns "He'd been doing her security detail a few weeks now. How _can_ they still think they have their target. If he's involved he knows they have the wrong person"

Everyone else is studying the playback and they're all just as confused. Mandy begins checking all her intel files."None of this makes any sense. Reagan was brought in from Washington for this. They would have checked him out. He would have been cleared at the highest level"

Jason sits back in the chair, his hands folded behind his head. He's trying to think."You're right, this doesn't make any sense"

The screen lights up with the playback again. The four security personnel grab C.J, putting a hood over her head, before shoving her into the waiting then shoots the Ambassador.

"Someone like him wouldn't' make that kind of mistake. Not at close quarters like that." Jason stares at Davis "Replay it again. What the hell are we missing here?"

Davis replays the tape, one more time. She puts the chat room message up on the other main screen.

"We have the unique package target secured" Ray keeps reading it over and over, rubbing his beard in frustration "You're right we're missing something obvious. So, what have we missed?" He's thinking it over "There must be something... something that explains this"

Clay's pacing around the room "So, we actually have no idea where she would they take her?" He rubs his head, he's frustrated "So what's gonna happen when they realize they do have the wrong target?" He's worried and he can't think straight "Shit! We should be out there, trying to find her. Not sitting here doing nothing." He's sweating a lot and rubs his hands through his hair. He squats down, sitting against the wall, taking deep breathes _Stay calm,Clay. We'll find her._

"Hey golden boy, what's your problem?" Jason now focus's his attention on Clay "We're doing what we can or don't you think we wanna find her? Cos if that's what you think then you couldn't be more wrong. It's no good getting _out there_ when we don't know where the hell she is."

Ray's been sitting in quiet contemplation and now he looks up "Hey guys, stop. Just listen" He looks at them both as he breaks up the heated discussion. He's still rubbing his chin, thinking. Everyone turn around to look at him. He scratches his head "Okay...look, I'm not sure how this might sound, so bear with me on this" he pauses and looks at Jason

"Well at this moment, we've got nothing so, just spit it out Ray"

"Okay, so what if Dubois wasn't the target?" he rubs his chin and furrows his forehead as both Clay and Jason frown at him "Yeah I know, I said bear with it, I know it doesn't make much sense, but what if she was bait?"

"Bait? Bait for what? " Jason sits up in his chair "I'm confused. Okay, sorry ...carry on. I'm listening"

"What if she was bait for us? Well not us, but for C.J" he stops to think about what he's saying "What I'm saying is what if they do have they right target. What if C.J _was_ it?" he looks at Jason and shrugs. "I mean if you consider _everything,_ you know " he raises his eyes, frowning at Jason "They might consider her a High value target, right?"

Waiting for a reaction from Jason he continues "They take her and then, you know...they um.. maybe put her up on a live stream and. ...oh,you know what I mean" He stops short of saying what exactly "Well that's gonna put some unknown crazies on the map. You _get_ what I'm saying?"

Blackburn's listening to Ray's theory, he nods and so does Jason "Yeah, yeah you might have something there Ray."

Clay's confused "What? What do you mean? I don't get it. What, you're saying because she's an officer, because of her rank? But c'mon seriously, they could pick any military personnel from anywhere. I don't understand" he frowns at Ray, he's waiting for answers. Ray looks away. Clay then looks to Jason for answers. Jason doesn't look at him and just sits there silently thinking

"Alright, c'mon. Why would they need to bait her? I mean, why here, now? Sorry, I don't get this. Why did they chose her as a target?" No one is answering his his questions and he's getting frustrated "I mean, c'mon guys.." He points to the screen "They had a high profile target right there, in Dubois, and they killed her!"

Ray rubs his face, letting out a long sigh. Then he says the thing, that only some in the room know. "Yeah thing is, they'd need to bait us, if they wanted... _that_ specific target." Ray points at the chat message "It says _unique_ target" he pauses "C'mon Jason, you now she's more than just standard military personnel, and you know I'm right that it was her they were going after."

Blackburn folds his arms, he looks at Jason them back to the screen."I think Ray's hit the nail on the head!"

"SHIT!" Jason runs his hands through his hair "Mandy, why the hell didn't you pick this up"

She shakes her head "Honestly, I never even thought about it. But, yeah I think he might be right. If this down to her family connections then, yeah that could make her unique, in someones eyes"

Jason, Mandy and Blackburn stop what they're doing and look at each other. Jason removes his hat, he rubs his head before replacing it "You're right Ray" He sits up, he's nodding as the realization sinks in. He looks at Blackburn and Mandy "You know one of you is gonna need to make that call"

Blackburn closes his eyes and takes a deep breath." this is all I need!"

While all these conversations are going on, at the back of the room a confused Clay and Davis look at each other. Clay looks at Sonny, who offers him nothing in the way of an explanation. In fact he's still sitting in same position as if nothing has happened, just feet up, chewing on his tooth pick

"Okay that's it ..." Clay stands up looking at them all "I'm still confused, does someone want to tell us what the _hell_ is going on" he gets the feeling the others know something he doesn't

"Oh no! Blondie here's confused" Sonny laughs, he takes the tooth pick out of his mouth and sits up straight on his chair "You want me to enlighten you?"

"Yeah, please.. do!"

"While..." he laughs again "you've drooling over her like a puppy, she forgot to tell you who her Daddy is" Clay frowns, he's even more confused. Sonny takes a deep breath "Well see, say them little terrorist nut jobs they suddenly get themselves... a US Admirals daughter...now that um...that like an ultra rare military, pokemon so to speak" he laughs "Then say these nut jobs decide they'll use her to make themselves a little movie"  
He looks at Clay to see if he's now starting to understand " And then they decide to do all kinds of nasty things to her and put that movie on the internet and post it _all over_ the world" he puts his toothpick back in his mouth "I mean, you're always telling me sharing is caring, right?"

He smiles but Clay's still frowning "Now, a movie like that, that might just get their sick little friendship group some attention real quick, don't you think" He stops and throws his toothpick in the trash.

"What? Sonny, this still makes no sense."

Davis stands nodding her head, she's put it all together before it even registers with Clay. "Wait! Sonny are you saying that Admiral Roger Lewis is CJ's father?"  
Davis looks around taking in the reactions of the room, Jason, Blackburn and Mandy look up and stare at her. "Woah!" she lets out a big sigh "Hell, well that I would say would make her more of a target"

"What?!" Clay frowns "C.J's father is Admiral Lewis?" He sits down on the chair in shock. He's trying to understand what he's hearing. And he's thinking about the time at the restaurant when he met her father. _No wonder she insisted on topics of conversation to avoid_.

He looks around the room but it's only Ray who nods, confirming everything. The room is silent now. Assessing and digesting the situation. Jason, Mandy and Blackburn sit back, thinking about the next move.

Mandy's first to speak"Okay, I've thought about this. It's not that straight forward. If this is true, then it possibly means there's been a high level breach of security here"

"How so?" Jason frowns, he's confused.

"Well from what I remember in the past..." she raises her eyebrows "...the information about their family connection, is classified information. I mean only either very, very close people have that information, or someone who has that amount of security clearance required to look at their files. I mean,they've both always been at pains to keep it a secret, so that means that someone must have leaked that information"

She looks at Jason "and the other thing, to get her here, to this location. It takes some pretty big maneuvers to pull that off. I mean she wasn't even meant to be on this operation, but hers got pulled last minute. That doesn't just happen. It was an established intel packaged already green lit.

Jason sits upright in his seat, taking onboard what she's saying. He bites his lip while he thinks "You know, I asked her if she pulled strings but maybe someone else did?" Jason frowns "Mandy, you need to find out who pulled that op and who signed off on her for this. That's where we start"

"Okay!" she nods "I'll see what I can come up with. But you know, this kind of classified, it'll go pretty high up."

Davis moves around the table to sit next to Sonny. She puts her hand to her mouth and whispers quietly under her breath "Doesn't seem that much of a classified secret to me, most of this room seems to know it"

Sonny raises his eyebrows. He looks around then leans towards Davis, pulling his hat down before he speaks "Well it ain't come from this room, that's for sure!"

"No that's not what I meant. Just if it's that classified, how come this room seems to know?"

"This room..." he lowers his tone to a whisper "only knows, cos of... what went on with her and Jason. It got real ugly and the old man had to pull rank in the end. Keep them both in their jobs. C'mon Davis we both know that fraternization is against the rules"

He looks up making sure no one's listening "Anyway, the admiral blamed Jason and he tore a hellava strip off him, in front of us all. It wasn't pretty that's for sure. That's how we found out who he was. But that...that is strictly between you and me, you understand"

She nods "Oh my god! Her and Jason eriously" Davis looks round "But was he still married then?"

"um hmm! He was gonna leave home for her" he looks up again, and now he notices Ray's staring at them, shaking his head. Sonny coughs. He realises Ray knows what they're talking about and so he stops "Look um... I'll fill ya in laters "

Clay is finally up to speed. " Wait! The English guy, the one in the bar. A few weeks back" he mumbles making no sense to anyone except himself "He might have known the connection. He was um... in a group they were making a scene, harassing her. He made a comment about _Daddy saving her_ I didn't know what he was talking about. They'd been drinking so nothing made sense. They were waiting outside" Clay's trying to remember back to that first night he met her.

"Wait when were you in a bar with her? "Jason questions."That's an interesting fact, Spenser? You never mentioned it before"

Ray darts a worried look to Sonny. Jason folds his arms and stares as Clay starts to flounder with his explanation "um ...no I wasn't with her, she was there and I was there I..I didn't know who she was till recently. But there was an incident and I stepped in" he tries to deflect Jason's attention "I just remember his accent and the comment. It seemed weird at the time but it was a nothing incident. I didn't think anything of it then, but now" he looks at Ray to help him out but Ray just shakes his head.

Blackburn looks at the screens again "Okay, well looks like I am gonna have to make that call then."

Mandy looks at him "I don't envy you that" she sighs "Never a good thing having to call the Admiralty office. You sure you don't mind?" she frowns secretly hoping he won't hand it over to her. She's not keen on calling Admiral Lewis to tell him they've lost his daughter to unknown terrorists and that I have no information to give him at this time!

"No!" Blackburn sighs "I think it'll be better coming from me? Can't pretend to say I relish it though" he heads out the door

"Eric, wait! Best make sure you speak to him directly. Don't leave message, If this is a leak, like I think, then we need to keep any information restricted. Oh, and of course ..." she sighs " tell him we're working on it!"

-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

After some time Blackburn returns. "Right heads up team, it's time we pull our socks up, smarten up. We're under the microscope now. I don't want us giving them any reason to look at us any more than they have to"

He looks directly at Sonny who looks unhappy "I tell ya that woman gives me a headache. She brings nothing but trouble. Now she got Cake eaters looking at us." he shakes his head, taking the toothpick out of his mouth and tossing it in the trash again "Even when she's not even here she's a pain in the ass" he sighs then smiles "You know I hope whoever hasher know what they've taken

Davis rushes back into the room "Guys you need to see"

she puts the monitors on "CNN, a video that just got posted in the chat group we're monitoring. The body of one of their journalists. He turned up, beheaded. found abandoned at an aid camp south east of the Nigerian capital. It's a new terror group, NFJ, Nigerian fighters for Jihad " she pauses "And..." she pauses "our chat room just came back online "

"Davis, get it on that screen"

The monitor now displays and Clay translates the arabic words

MESSAGE: 'target now in our possession. Transfer is awaiting instruction'

"Wait what?" he's reading "They sold her?" he has this deep frown on his faced "No sorry um ...that's the direct translation.I think they're waiting a money transfer"

Mandy looks at him "Okay,that's good, Um... I didn't mean good but, if money's involved then there'll be an online trail and we'll find it. This has to have been organized, not a random terrorist kidnap"

"Any news on her tracker?" Blackburn asks Davis

"Nothing concrete, we did get a weak signal at one point when they left the city but at the " she shakes her head "I'll keep trying "

"That Brent guy, if he really knows who she is, he's gotta know she'll have one?" Jason frowns, worried. "Being ex special forces, he's gonna check for it!"

"Jason.." Blackburn tries to reassure him "let's just assume that she still has it!"

"Do we have anymore on him?" he looks at Mandy. She shakes her head "Dammit! arrgghh! SHIT! You know, she said something was off with him. I should've pulled her out then. Should've trusted her instinct."  
Jason's starting to feel the pressure, aside from any feelings for C.J, and his guilt over what happened in the having anything to go on, and not being out there is getting to him.

"I'm running a deep background check now "

"Well do it faster" he snaps at Davis "every minute counts here"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

 **Briefing Room - 15hrs Later**

They're still working on intel, though they still have nothing, when the door to the briefing room swings open.

Everyone looks up and then immediately stands to attention.

"Admiral Lewis. Sir! " Blackburn stares, he's taken by total surprise at the unannounced arrival. "Um... Sir, Good afternoon I um..I didn't realise you would be attending in person?" He and the rest of Bravo look at each other. Blackburn looks at Davis he's annoyed that no one has given him a heads up.

"No I can see that, Commander" he looks at the surprised looks on their faces. Then he takes the chair that Jason was sitting in and sits down " So..."

"Sir,we can bring you up to speed on what we have" Blackburn snaps his fingers at Davis

"No need, Davis, as per my request, has kept me in the loop during my flight here"

"Um... , if you'd just let me know you were attending then I could have personally kept you up to date"

"Commander, the killing of a UN Ambassador is _TOP_ priority. It's been flagged at Command HQ. So, I need this cleared up ASAP and this is why I'm in situ to to oversee it."

"Yes Sir!"

Jason and Blackburn look at each other. They bot know that's not normal protocol. The guess is that its the official line he's using for his _personal_ interest in the situation.

Davis looks a little guilty that she had to keep it quiet. But she'd been contacted directly by the Admirals office and told to say nothing. "What was I supposed to do?" she quietly mouths to Sonny who's squinting at her as if she was a traitor. She shrugs her shoulders "I had no choice"

Clay doesn't know where to look. This is the same man he sat at the dinner table with, telling lies to. He told him he was a Gym instructor So how's he going to explain this now. He wants the ground to swallow him up and he keeps trying to avoid looking at him

But it's too late and the Admiral points at him "You! Do I know you?"

 _SHIT! Clay swallows_ "No sir I don't think so?" Clay squirms. What can he say? After all he can't say, yes we had dinner. That would open a whole can of worms but here he is now lying to an officer, again!

"We've met before?"

"No sir I would remember" Clay swallows again _oh god! this is not good!_ He still tries not to look at him but Jason is suspicious that something's not right but seeing how uncomfortable Clay looks Jason heads off the question

"No Sir Spenser is new to BRAVO, last time you were here he wasn't"

The Admiral doesn't take his eyes off of Clay. "Master Chief Hayes..."

Jason closes his eyes _Oh Shit!_

He continues with his back to Jason "No,you're right, he wasn't but you ...you unfortunately were!" He turns the chair to face him and looks him up and down "and by some _miracle_ of chance, you still are!" he sneers at Jason, looking him up and down "Commander by the looks of some of you team We need to improve some standards here. Perhaps starting with uniform code" he looks at Jason's T-shirt and untidy dress sense.

"Um... Yes Sir" Blackburn frowns at Jason "I'm right on it, Sir!"

The Admirals dislike of Jason is evident to everyone "I believe last time I saw you Master Chief Hayes, we had hope that doesn't become a habit" He stands up and Jason stands to attention. "Yes Sir I remember"

Sonny and Ray swallow hard they also remember the _words_ when the Admiral spoke to Jason, and it wasn't good.

"Sir" Blackburn tries to deflect the awkwardness of the situation "Maybe a coffee, Sir?"

Admiral Lewis nods "That's a good idea Commander. I'm sure Master Chief Hayes can manage to fetch coffees?"

Jason bites his tongue "Yes Sir. I could do with the air, anyway"

Ray and Sonny get up to leave with him "We'll come with you" officers make Sonny uncomfortable

"Two sugars!"

Jason purses his lips and grinds his teeth. Ray puts his hand on Jason's back and replies for him "Yes sir " he smiles at Jason  
"C'mon man keep it together" he whispers to Jason

Clay feels awkward, he now left alone with the Admiral "So...Petty Officer Spenser,you sure we haven't met?" the Admiral stands up from the desk he'd been sitting on

"Sir I …"

"Yes, Yes. I know, you couldn't say anything." He lets out a long, tired sounding sigh, while he paces the room "The Lieutenant, as you will find, has a habit of creating chaos where this team is concerned" He stops in front of Clay looking him up and down "You know, this probably doesn't have a great outcome what ever way we go about it. I of course can't condone this, but... " he pauses watching Clay's reaction " I gather you care about my daughter?"

Clay swallows hard before answering "Yes Sir"

"That's good then, because right now, Mr Spenser, there are eleven, very scared women out there, in some god forsaken hell hole and the important thing is getting them home to their loved ones. Do you agree?"

"Yes Sir"

"Then you''ll do everything to ensure they ALL get brought back, are we clear?"

Clay bites his bottom lip and nods his head "Understood Sir"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason enters the room with the coffee but the Admiral ignores them, pushing past him. "Master Chief I'm authorising this operation. As of now this is a hostage rescue mission and I've made clear to Mr Spenser that failure of this operation is _not_ an option. Your Team, needs to ensure you bring _all_ of those women home at any cost. _ALL_ of them you understand me?"

"Yes Sir" Jason gulps. He frowns hard at Clay as the Admiral walks out of the door

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Davis has a trace on the tracke as it suddenly blips on her screen. "She's not given it up!" Davis smiles to herself "Her tracker I've got it! Getting a location on it now" she shouts across the room, grabbing everyone's attention

"Okay, she still got it, That's good" Blackburn looks at Jason. "It means they don't know she has it. Heads up, this information needs to stay in this room" Blackburn's thinking about that potential leak "Everything from now on stays with Bravo. Nothing, do you hear, nothing leaves this room without my authorization"

The chat room page lights up and video starts to upload. "Sir!" Davis shouts "I think you need to see this!"

Blackburn spins round "Oh SHIT!" he puts his hand to his mouth "Oh no, dear god!"

The video comes on screen of the ten women hostages, plus one at the front that at first they don't recognize. She's tied up and blindfolded. She looks badly bruised and bloodied.

"Oh God! It's her." Clay's recognises the tattoo on her wrist and his heart sinks as he puts his hands on his head "Oh no what are they going to do?"  
He's standing up straight and holds his breath putting his hand on his mouth "Oh God!" he panics "Are they gonna kill her?"

Jason gulps, he's thinking exactly the same thing. "Oh SHIT! NO!" He's seen enough of these internet postings to know how these things usually end.  
"Oh Jeez...NO! " he closes his eyes as the whole room goes quiet.

The video plays as the terrorist guard takes the metal pole he's holding and strikes across C.J's ribs and back. She doubles over and falls to her knees.  
They pick her up and keep repeating again and again for the camera.

The Command room hasn't moved. Everyone is holding their breath.

"Switch it off! Davis, turn it off, that's enough" Jason finally cracks. He rubs his hands through his hair then rests them on his hips and paces around. He feels physically sick.

Clay grinds his teeth and stares at the screen. He thinks he might throw up as his fear and anger surge through his body.  
Ray prays resting his chin in his hand. Sonny shakes his head and looks down closing his eyes. Brock looks at Trent. There's just this total silence in the room.

"Lordy lord" Sonny lets out a deep sigh, shattering the quiet, as he looks at Jason. He shuffles in his chair. Even as much as he dislikes C.J, and the trouble he see's her bring, the sight of that video makes him crumble "Hell, I can't look at that! We have to get her back"

Davis has been working on the location "Her tracker, it's just pinged again, must have been when they moved her to take that video and its used their upload connection allowed it to connect"

"Do we have the Location?" Blackburn asks

"Yes Sir! Already on it." she taps some things on the computer "Location co ordinates are on screen"

Jason stands up he doesn't take his eyes off the paused video screen "Get geared up, time to go! And let's hope she's still alive when we get there!"

Clay hasn't moved and Sonny pushes him out of the door "Hey Ken, snap out of it! It's time to pack up. We need to go bring Barbie home"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Next Chapter

(sorry didnt know how to insert one after)

 **RESCUE OPERATION**

The tracker co ordinates have them headed to a remote farm location that was at one point used for cocaine production. It has one road in and is hidden deep in dense jungle. Bravo are loaded and ready to go and they halo in under darkness, making the trek to the farm on foot.

When they arrive on site they manage to locate all of the women, huddled together in a main tin shed, but there is no sign of C.J. and non of the women kow where she is

"SHIT! They must be holding her somewhere else" Jason's still hoping after the video that she's still alive. A truck that is sat empty at the side of the shed, is going to be their transport out

"We'll use that to get them out. Load em up!"

They load the women quietly on to the truck. Some of the backup team is tasked with driving it away."Okay you need to stay quiet and we'll get you all out of here" Jason speaks with Mack who's going to drive them out "As soon as we start that truck this place is gonna light up. So, we need to find C.J first okay?"

Jason checks everyone knows what to do "Give us ten minutes, to do a sweep, then whatever you drive away." He turns to the rest of BRAVO "We need to split up, cover more ground" he points to the left "Bravo 2 you take 3 & 6\. I'll take the hair missile with us"

Most of the guards have been taking drugs and drinking to pass the time out here. So a lot are asleep, or out of it, and are easy take downs. But It will be daylight soon and more will return. They need to get the truck with the woman out as soon as they can.

"Eight mins forty time's nearly up and we don't have her yet" Jason looks at Trent "If we don't have her when the truck starts up, she'll be the first one they'll kill. We need to find her."

Sonny and Spenser prize open the door on a tin shed at the back of the farm. There Inside they can see a heavy chain from the ceiling, with a pool of blood underneath it. It's hanging loose, with a large metal pole laid on the ground.  
They search around and as their eyes adjust to the dark, Sonny can make out the shape in the corner of a small person shaped heap "JACKPOT!"

Clay takes a deep breath and exhales. "Oh god, is she alive?" He thinks about the uploaded video and he's thought about how even he would have struggled with the beating she took.  
Then suddenly they hear the sound of the truck engine starting up. Clay looks at his watch "Times up! We need to get out of here" He knows Mack and the support team will now be driving the women hostages away. and they can now hear gun fire on the other side of the camp.

"Bravo 1 this is Bravo have Jackpot, say again we have Jackpot!"

Jason sigh's with relief "Bravo 2 this is Bravo 1 Copy. How is she?" Jason closes his eyes, waiting for the reply. Normally he'd leave the praying to Ray but he does it now.

"Checking the sitrep " Ray waits as Clay cuts the ropes holding her. He notices how deep they've cut into the flesh on her wrists. She looks really badly bruised and has hardly any strength to move "CJ come on, let's get you up"

"BRAVO 1, this is 2. She's alive. But she does need medical assistance ASAP Copy"

Jason lets out a massive sigh. "Copy that. Get to a safe lo cal. We're pinned down here. We gonna come round. Make your way to ex fill. and we'll meet you there. COPY "

"HAVOC this is Bravo 1 we need medical assistance. Ex fill please advise"

"BRAVO one, copy that. Standby for sitrep "

"Come on we need to get you out of here" Spenser frowns as he tries to lift her gently to her feet. She's too weak and can't stand and so Clay picks her up. She groans in pain as he holds her tight in his arms. "Shit! She's in a really bad way"

Sonny frowns, he can hear the gunfire. It's getting closer to them "Okay, we need to go, let's speed it up. We gonna be taking heat any time soon"  
He has the entrance covered but they're struggling to walk her out. Clay can't lift her properly due to her injuries and so it's really slow going as she shuffles her feet across the sandy ground.

Ray's thinking around their situation and how fast they're moving "This is no good we're gonna have to head to cover, till Jason comes with help"  
He gets back on the radio "Bravo 1 this is Bravo 2, We're heading for cover. We need to wait for back up. We moving too slow to head to ex fill "

"Bravo 2 this Bravo 1, copy that. We'll find you. We have the dog. 1 out "

They head into the thick of the jungle undergrowth, carrying C.J as best they can between them. After fifteen mins of walking they need to stop. The humidity and terrain are slowing them down and now the tropical rain starts to fall. They stop and finds a small area surrounded by rocks and they set C.J down, covering her over. They've minimal first aid with them and Ray unpacks what they have "Okay, we'll rest here until Jason finds us "

"If they find us" Sonny frowns "if we don't get eaten by spiders first! Did you know there are ..."

"Sonny please ... "Ray stops him before they have the story about man eating spiders he gives every Jungle op "they ll find us, they have the dog. He'll find your smell, even out here"

He has to smile as Sonny sniffs his own shirt "Okay, I'll take that given the situation"

Clay laughs, he shakes his head then he sits down next to CJ. He takes a deep breath as he checks on her. Ray takes out a long bandage from their medical kit "I was going to put try put round her, give some support round her ribs. Stop it from rubbing, where we're holding her"

Clay gently lifts the dirty tee shirt she's wearing to survey her injuries "I don't think that's gonna work. That bruising is, really bad. Looks likes she's got soem broken ribs there"

As they look at her badly blood covered body they take a sharp, shocked intake of breath "Whoa! That is bad!" They all stare at each other, wondering the best course of actionr "That bandage its not gonna do anything with those injuries"

"Where the hell is Trent when you need him? What else have you got in there?"

She groans, it's the first time she's made a noise, since they got her out of that shed. Now she starts to come around, properly, her face is contorted with pain. " _aaarggnh!_ ...SHIT!" she cries, her eyes closed tight. And after looking at how bruised she is, Clay can only imagine the pain she must be.

"CJ, just hold in there, we're gonna try an' sort you out, just keep it together for now."

"HAVOC this is Bravo 2 do you have eyes on us? "

"Negative Bravo 're working on it. The tree cover is not making it easy"

"Copy that" Ray sighs "Okay, looks like we're on our own for a while. Let's try and get some rest"

Clay lifts C.J's shirt again, he wants to keep a check on her "Shit! That bruising is getting worse, she must be in a lot of pain, is there nothing we can do for her?"

She's crying now as Sonny also checks on her, he didn't see how bad it was before and he grimaces as he looks "Jeez man, that is bad. We gotta get her some pain relief"

Clay gently places his fingers against her skin, checking along her ribs "CJ, I'm just gonna check see if anything's broken"

"Okay!" she takes a sharp breath in "Clay, just... careful" She grimaces and groans in pain " _arrrrrggghhhh!"_ She screams out loud as he fingers come into contact with her body " Ahhh! Clay... STOP! Oh my god, that hurts"

"Sorry, I'm Sorry okay, I just need to check" he holds her head against his chest, stroking her hair, trying to keep her calm her down.

"We've got some morphine, let's give her that"

Ray rummages in the medical bag. Sonny frowns "You know I um.. I hate to point it out but If we give her that, then she gonna be like dead weight to walk out of here. It's not making it easier in this terrain"

Ray nods weighing up the pros and cons of it "Yeah I know what you're saying but um...she needs it. We'll give her some now and rest up while we wait it out. Hopefully Jason and the others pick us up soon, we can perhaps carry her out then."

They all nod in agreement as Ray prepares the vial and injection. Then he stabs it hard into the muscle of her leg " _Owwww!_ Shit!" she squeals as Ray releases the liquid pain killer into her "Ray!... Oh my god, that hurt!" She gulps as the pain rockets through her sensitive body.

"Sorry" he frowns "Just give it a minute, it's gonna help"

"Yeah...well... it.." she takes a deep breath in " it just reminds me, why you're not a medic"

Sonny shakes his head "God, woman, you're always moaning"

Ray and Spenser laugh and C.J relaxes her body and for the first time smiles. A few minutes later the morphine starts to have its desired effect and she starts to drift in a cloud with a lot less pain.

Now she's drifting in and out of conscious sleep "Clay, don't let her go to sleep. Try keep her semi conscious, as much as possible. Just in case we need to move"

She's lying on Clay's chest and he covers her over with his jacket. He feels her forehead and can see her body shivering "She seems a bit cold" He kisses the top of her head and strokes her hair back.

"Just keep an eye on her. Trent should be here soon!" Sonny and Ray look at each other. Sonny shakes his head as they take watch. "You know Jason's not gonna be happy with that"

"Yeah, well we'll deal with that, when we have to. Let's just concentrate on getting out of here for now. Bravo 1 this is Bravo 2 do you copy"

"Bravo 2 We're on route to you now. We counted four hostiles inbound. We're working clean up, but be ready. What's your sitrep? "

"Copy that Bravo 1. sit rep is not good. We've administered one shot of morphine. We letting her rest while we wait. Copy "

"COPY that Bravo 2. Just stay alert. They should be in your direction soon. We're inbound "

"HAVOC this is Bravo 2. Do you have eyes on us yet, Copy"

"That's a negative Bravo 2. The tree canopy is still making it too difficult. The satellite cant get a loCal. Working on a trace for the tracker. Any way you can get to higher ground, somewhere clear of trees? COPY"

"HAVOC we can't move at the moment it's too risky. COPY"

Davis gets on the radio "Bravo 2. If you can't move her anyway you can move the tracker?"

"HAVOC, this is Bravo 3. Davis did you not hear BRAVO 2? We can't move her. And last time I checked the tracker was still attached to her"

"Bravo 3 this is Havoc. Can you make it unattached. Copy"

They all look at each other and frown "Make it unattached, what the hell does she mean?." Sonny rubs his head

"HAVOC this is Bravo 2 say again you're last"

"BRAVO you remove the tracker?" Davis pauses "It's just under the skin surface should be fairly easy"

They all exchange glances again "Does she mean cut it out?."Sonny frowns "SHIT! you know, I wish you hadn't queried that Ray. I think preferred not knowing"

"HAVOC standby. I'll get back to you. Copy" Ray lets out a long sigh "Shit! What do we do?" Ray, Spenser and Sonny all look at each other, contemplating what Davis asked

Sonny chews his gum as he considers the radio message "So Davis, she means,you know .. take it out?"

Ray nods

"Okay then, I'll do it." he takes out the knife from the sheath on his belt as Clay and Ray frown at him "Hey, I have the most experience with knives"

Ray and Spenser continue staring at him with a look of horror on their faces "Are you sure?" Ray questions Sonny's stomach for doing this.

"Yeah sure. I mean how hard can it be? I can gut a fish, it's like that, right?"

He gets his knife ready as Clay carefully holds her head against this chest and pulls her hair away from her ear. She groans at all the moving around and suspects something is about to happen "Clay, what's going on?"

"Its just there." He points to Sonny as the lump behind her ear

"Clay ..." she fidgets trying to look at him. Suddenly she panics and confused she starts to cry "..what are you doing?"

"CJ, I'm sorry okay. We have to do this. We need... need to get the tracker from behind your" he swallows hard "they can't locate on us, because of the trees and we can't move you so we need to try and use the tracker"

"Okay," She takes a deep breath "okay, just do it "  
She closes her eyes, leaning her head against Clay's chest. He holds her tight keeping her steady as Sonny prepares himself "Alright Sonny..." Clay looks at him "just hurry up, get it done while that morphine's still working"

She takes a deep breath. Sonny can see the red lump behind her ear and he carefully places the edge of the blade against it. Then he stops. He hands the knife to Ray "You better do it. You have smaller hands. I'll probably cut her ear off. It'll only give her something to be more pissed off with me about"

Clay smiles, for all his bravado the reality of what he has to do hits Sonny and he can't do it. Ray takes a deep breath "Okay!" he sighs "CJ, you need to hold steady. Believe me, this is gonna hurt me more than you"

Realising what they are about to do C.J responds quietly, taking a deep breath "Yeah thanks for that Ray"

As he just gets the tip of the knife close to her ear,closing his eyes before he touches the skin, when a shot goes off making them all stop. They still upright and keep still. Sonny gets his gun ready and Clay stands up.

They make her as safe and comfortable as they can "Just stay there, we got this!" Clay tries to reassure her, as they take up defensive positions to counter the shots that ring out through the trees "Here they come" He stares down his weapon then lets of a round and they hears a cry somewhere in the thick of the the bushes.

Sonny's impressed, he smiles as he turns to look at Clay ."And the crowd goes wild as the kid score an 8 out of 10"

Clay laughs. "Oh c'mon, that's gotta be an 8.5 surely?"

Sitting in silence, they now don't hear anything. Then from the dark of the undergrowth there's a snap as a tree branch breaks. Sonny lets off a few rounds in the general direction of the sound.

"Bravo 2 this is bravo 1 we have visual on you. Stay where you are. You have targets approaching from the wet "

Two more of Sonny rounds go off from behind Ray where he sits in their rock bunker. Then out of the darkness they're jumped on, by big hairy wet dog,  
"Cerb! You found us"

Then through the thick of the forest, Jason Brock and Trent catch up. They're all crouched behind the rocks, sitting in silence. Jason quietly indicates Two with his fingers for the two tangos ahead of them .

Ray and Spenser position themselves ready, when suddenly they all look around at the shrill sound "Arrrghhh!" as C.J cries out in pain. Jason reacts dropping himself down beside her

"CJ, sshhh! Quiet." he sits with her, pulling her head against his chest, his hand lightly across her mouth trying to muffle her cries from giving them away "I know, I know it hurts but please just hold it in for a few more minutes" he continues rocking her in his arms, stroking her hair trying to keep her silent but well aware of how much she's hurting.

Sonny looks at Ray as Clay makes a quick glance at them but putting but his feelings aside he concentrates on his job. To get them all out safely.

"CJ ?" Jason looks her in the face he can see she's drifting unconcious "Hey, c'mon... CJ wake up! No, no, no. Don't go to sleep on , C'mon you need to stay awake"

He checks on the team, they're all concentrating, focused on what's out there in front of them. He brushes her hair from her face. She's so bruised and hurt. He drops a kiss gently on her forehead as she closes her eyes then he whispers in her ear "CJ, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for back there at the base, in the bathroom, I shouldn't have done that to you."

She opens her eyes looking at him, Groaning again as the pain rips through her body. "It's okay" she smiles at him as she tries to get more comfortable. She can hardly move. She's holding her stomach, moaning with the ache "Arrghhh! Oh, Jason please... help me. I can't... .argghh! It hurts so bad"

He's worried watching her as her stomach starts cramping. She's crying so much and he's trying to keep her quiet but he's worried now. They need to get out and soon. "CJ are you okay?"

"No!" she closes her eyes

"Trent" he calls over "Somethings wrong. She needs help"

Clay lets off another two rounds in rapid succession and the trees fall silent. They stand down and sit quiet. Listening to the silence  
"Think that's it?" Sonny frowns looking over at Spenser.

After few more moments of silence, they all relax. Trent's beside Jason as they lay CJ flat on the ground while he examines her.

"HAVOC this is Bravo 1 we have jackpot. But we'll need immediate medical ex fill. copy"

"Bravo 1 this is HAVOC" Davis voice comes back over the radios " Did they you get the tracker?"

Ray shakes his head "There was no time, but at least Trent's here now. That makes it easier"

They start to prepare as Trent takes the scalpel from his kit.

Jason lifts her head holding it on his lap "Alright, I've got her" he holds her head tight and still against him "Sshh! C'mon, you can do this."

"Sorry, but this is going to sting" Trent puts the scalpel blade to the skin on her ear and she lets out a high pitched cry "Ahhh shit!"" she squirms in Jason's arms, shutting her eyes to the pain.

"I'm sorry, I'm going to do do it as fast as I can" Trent frowns, as blood starts to run down her cheek. Everyone looks away. He fiddles, to get the small chip tracker

"Ohhhh God hurry, the fuck, up!"

"I'm trying. Sorry big fingers, small tracker " he shakes his head annoyed he can't get hold of it in "I've got it!" He hands it to Ray, as he starts on dressing the small incision he made behind her ear. He laugh as he looks at her "At least you didn't make as much fuss as you did when it went in!"

"Yeah" she sighs, returning the smile " but I hadn't had all this morphine then!"

"Right Davis said we need to get it to an area clear of the trees"

"Up there!" Jason points to an a clearing where the trees break on a ridge

"I'll go" Clay offers "I'll guess I'm fastest"

Brock coughs and looks at Cerberus. Clay smiles "Okay, he wins" The attach the chip to Cerb's jacket and Brock takes a ball from his rucksack

"HAVOC this is Bravo 1. We sending the tracker now." he takes a deep breath as Brock launches the ball and sends Cerb up the hill "Lets hope this works"

"Jackpot!" the tracker lights up on Davis's screen "BRAVO 1. Got you. organizing exfil now" she comes back "BRAVO 1, clearing two clicks west. We can put a helo down. But you need make your way there now to hit the window"

"Two clicks? That's not far, but far enough the way she is to walk" Jason frowns, giving the situation some thought "CJ, do you think you can stand up, if we support you between us?"

She nods as Spenser and Ray take hold of either side of her, taking her weight. The pain is so intense that she feels sick and nearly passes out.

"Let me just have a quick look at her, while she's standing" Trent starts to examine her body "I just wanna see if anything's broken" He frowns as he works his hand slowly and gently over her skin. He sighs "Okay, it looks like there's at least one broken rib, I'm guessing there's a few more. It's gonna be very painful for some time " Jason frowns as Trent shows him

"Right, then we have to go slow and careful. Are you ready? We need to get make that exfil. The helo can't wait. They're gonna be sending people after us"

She nods. Jason looks at everyone and takes a deep breath "Okay let's move! HAVOC this is BRAVO 1 we're heading to exfil "

o=o=o=o=o=o=o

Finally they make the exfil point "HAVOC this this BRAVO . Were's that Helo?"

"BRAVO 1 this this is HAVOC. Helo is one mic out, Copy"

"Copy that, 1 out" Jason looks around at the team. Everyone looks exhausted. It wasn't far, but carrying in the heat and humidity over that terrain wasn't easy "Okay, helo is 1 mic out. We're gonna need to get across that clearing"

They can hear Whump of the helo blades as they stop it coming into land "Sonny, you're gonna take up the rear, cover us 'til we get her on the chopper"  
As the helo comes to the ground Jason gives them the nod to be ready "Okay, ready to exfil. On three" Jason starts counting " 3...2..."

"Arrgghhhh!" CJ let's out a massive high pitched cry "Oh god, _wait!_!" she grabs at her stomach, doubled in half with pain." _OH SHIT! urrgh!_ I'm gonna be sick" She coughs and chokes as she retches. The pain is intense as she coughs " _arrrghhh, Jeez!_ I can't do this!" she takes a deep breath "Ahh! Help me, oh, what the fuck is happening to me!"  
She puts her hand out and grabs Jason body armor. He holds her steady as she retches to be sick again "A _rrrghhh!_ " she's still holding her stomach

"Shit! Trent, what the hell's wrong with her?" Clay panics, looking back and forward between CJ and the medic

"I don't know." Trent's examining her stomach trying to assess where the pain is coming from. There's nothing visible that helps with his diagnosis. They attempt to sit her down but that just seems to make it worse "CJ, Where do you feel the pain most?"

She holds her hand on her lower stomach as she groans

Jason looks up at the helo waiting "What's the sudden hold up? Can we make it to that helo or not?"

"I can't see what's causing it. You need to give me a minute to assess, I don't wanna move her unless we have to."

"Come on Trent I need some answers. Can we move her or not?" Jason's pacing around, rubbing his head. The pressure is getting to him now "We need to get moving, that helo is vulnerable there. We're gonna lose this exfil window"

Trent's checking her all over. He really can't tell what's going on "I don't know, I can't see anything. It must be something internal, that's causing all this pain."

She's crying, her breathing is fast and its taking an effort. Her stomach keeps cramping up and she takes deep breaths through each wave of pain. She can't stand Trent touching her and she keeps waving him away. It hurts so much. "CJ let me look you"

Finally she caves and he presses her stomach, as gently as possible, but it hurts and it just makes her cry more every time he touches it.

"HAVOC this is Bravo 1" Jason sighs running his hand through his hair "We're gonna have to push back exfil. We have a medical situation. Standby. Trent how long?"

Trent shrugs "I really don't know. I just can't tell what the problem is"

"Um ..." Ray interupts them "I'm not a medic but that can't be good?" He points to the bright red blood that's now covering the inner thigh of her dirty beige combats

"Shit!.Lets sit her down! .CJ...CJ we need you to sit down!"

"arrrrghh! I feel ... " the color drops from her face and she faints into Trent's arms as he helps her down.

"BRAVO 1, this is HAVOC . The helo can give you a six minute push back. Helo needs refuel"

"Shit! Okay.." Jason tries to think "..okay, you need to work this out we have six minutes" he checks his watch

"Oh god it hurts so much" CJ comes round enough to make sense. She's still holding her stomach, taking short sharp breaths as she tries to ease the pain.

Trent prepares some more morphine "I'm gonna give her this. We're gonna have to carry out. Otherwise, she won't make it"

"Okay, do it! We've got no choice now. We need to make that helo"

"CJ, are you listening? I'm gonna give you some more pain relief, but because of what you had before, it's probably gonna make you feel sleepy. But that means we're gonna have to carry you out, and I can't promise you won't feel it even with this"  
Trent takes his hand off her and he looks at Jason with concern in his face. " I can only guess. Internal bleed, but its so hard to tell out here"

"Okay!" Jason has his hands on his hips He takes his radio earpiece out while he thinks "We need to get to that Helo. There's no more gotta go" he looks at the team and they all nod in agreement.

"What you thinking Brother?" Ray frowns

Jason hands his weapon to Ray and squats down beside CJ. She's drifting in and out of sleep as the morphine takes its effect. " C.J listen up. I gotta do this so I'm sorry, but there is no other way." He frowns watching her face. He's not sure if she can understand what he's saying ".C.J are you listening?" He wants to get her attention but she has her eyes closes and he slaps her cheek to get her attention "C.J !"

"Hey Jace, take it steady!" Ray can sense Jason's tension

"Okay, we're doing this. This is gonna hurt her like we _need_ to make that exfil"

She's in so much pain that it's clouding her mind. She feels so sick. She opens her eyes and smiles at him "Just do it!" She takes a deep breath, bracing herself

Sonny hands his weapon to Clay "I'll take her"

"No! No, I'll take her, Ray you take point. Sonny you take the rear. Cover us. Okay, lets do this" He squats down and gets his balance. Ray nods at Sonny "On three lift"

They all look at each other "This is gonna hurt like hell" Sonny sighs.

"Just watch that rib" Trent says "That's what I'm concerned about most"

Ray looks at Sonny "Alright...3..2..1... lift!"

They lift her as gently as they can into Jason's arms. He holds her tight against his chest. But even with all the morphine she screams and cries with the pain.  
Clay closes his eyes as the piercing sound of the scream."arrrhh fuckkk!"

Seeing her hurting like this makes Sonny and Brock look away. Ray gulps as he looks at Jason. Clay just quiet he wants to help but he feels so sidelined not knowing what to do. She's still crying, taking deep breaths. Her head is spinning from the intense pain. She's not sure if she's going to be sick or pass out.

"She don't look good there" Sonny frowns as the color drains from her face.

Clay looks at Trent. He shakes his head, he feels panicked "She's not gonna make it is she?"

"HAVOC this is Bravo 2, we're gonna need medical standing by when we land. Copy "

"COPY that BRAVO 2"

"Okay, lets move" Jason keeps his grip on her and gets his balance as they go.

Making the last dash across the open ground. At the open helo door they gently lower her in, trying to inflict as little pain as possible. Trent's looking at her "She's unconcious, Jason let her go!" he pushes him out of the way as he hurries to check "Her pulse is slowing" he looks at the helo's onboard medical crew.

Jason stands up. He straightens his back and shakes it out from carrying her weight. He looks at Trent for update. Trent shakes his head "I gotta say, it's not looking good"

"Shit!" Jason rubs his head "Okay, let's get loaded up and get out of here!"

The medics put CJ a line up. They give her more pain relief and a couple of injections of adrenaline. The blood loss is worrying, they still don't know what's causing it.

The team sit in silence. All that can be heard is the whump, whump of the helo blades, the pilots on the radio, Cerberus panting and the noticable deep breaths from CJ.

The medic runs the next drip through "She's still losing blood and we're twenty mins out. That was the last blood bag" He pauses looking at Trent "We could try a person to person line in. It's risky but, right now it's all we've got. Your call, she's your team."

Trent takes a deep breath he looks at Jason. He's confused he doesn't understand

"I'll do it!" Clay's voice is clear over the already understands what the medics mean. He's been listening to every word of the conversations.

Trent looks at him. He understands his intentions "If we're gonna do this, then, actually Sonny's the nearest match"

"What? I'm what? " Sonny frowns as he hears his name "Match for what?"

"Person to person, blood transfusion" Clay explains "Sonny, roll up your sleeve" he grabs at Sonny's shirt

"Hey, don't touch me " he frowns as pushes Clay off. Thinking about what they're asking him to do. He looks at her laid there and takes a deep breath  
"I can roll up my own damn sleeve" he sighs "Oh man, is this some sort of sick joke. Me saving her!"

Trent smiles as they put a line in his vein for the transfusion. He squeamishly looks away. "She damn well better appreciate this is!"

She groans as they put another line in her arm. Clay takes deep breathes watching as the blood starts to flow "How long before she gets that oxygen hit?"

Trent frowns "Anytime now. If its gonna work"

She starts to come around and her cheeks flush with a little more color. Jason lets out a sigh "Is it working? " he looks at Trent for the answer.

He nods "looks like it, is starting to"

"Thank god!" Jason let's out a long relieved sigh

"You know I can't believe I'm having to do this" Sonny shakes his head "She better not give me anything or I swear to god.."

"Sonny" she breathlessly responds through the oxygen mask, as she partially opens her eyes "Shut the hell up!"

Sonny smiles at her. "Her, just for once, it's good to hear you speak! but um... don't get too comfortable, it still don't mean I like ya"

The others all let out sigh of relief except Trent. He and the medic are still monitoring her and as they look at each othe,r they know, whilst its good to hear her speak she's still not out of danger.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sonny's sat beside her on the helo floor. He's looking at her thinking about all the hate he's given over the years. Wondering if perhaps this makes amends for that. _Maybe she shouldn't have taken all of the blame!_

He blamed for the hurt caused to Alana. For being part of their problems and wrecking Jason's marriage. _Though that wasn't strictly true!_ Jason and Alana's problems ran deeper than just C.J

He also hated her for the guilt he carried. For the lie he told Jason. Because, when Jason asked him if he knew who she left with _that_ night, he told him NO.

And though he never said a word to Ray, he knew it was Ray. He knew it was Ray that she cheated with because he saw them kiss in the parking lot as they left the bar.

And he blamed her for having to keep that secret because of the damage the truth would have done. He was angry that she didn't stop it that he was angry _he_ hadn't stopped it. He knew the guilt tore at Ray and so he hated her for that.

Sonny hated her for all of the shit that followed when it all came out and when Jason nearly lost his career. He hated her because she would never let Jason go, she always had this hold over him and it messed with his head.

But now, as he looks at her laid there. On the brink of dying. He thinks just maybe...maybe she didn't deserve the blame for all of it.

He'd always seen her as a poison around Bravo, but perhaps Jason and Ray were as much to blame. Maybe he should have hated on them too? Not that he could because they were his brothers so he covered their backs always.

Suddenly he's back to reality as they medic starts taking the line out of his arm. Her eyes are firmly closed and she starts to convulse "Sonny, hold that on it!" Trent puts a dressing pad on the area of his arm from the line.

"She's crashed" the medic grabs Trent's attention just as the helo is coming into land "That's good they have medics standing by"

Trent goes with the waiting medics and they whisk her away.

Jason's watching, rubbing his head, concerned. Spenser's biting his lip, he's so worried and Sonny shakes his head as he looks at Ray who's saying a prayer in his head.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5: How are you doing?**

 **US NIGERIA Command HQ - Nigeria operation debrief**

Bravo headed to the de-brief, but Clay's mind is all over the place, seeing her whisked away like that and not even knowing if she's going to make it. He's trying to get himself together, but he's panicked. He can't breathe, he's hot and he feels dizzy. Bammm! His crashes backwards into the wall hard. Stunned for a moment he wonders if he passed out. _Did I faint?_

But without warning Jason has slammed him backwards into the wall. " _Whoa!_ What the hell, man?" Clay's taken aback by Jason's reaction "What the hell's going on?"

"HOW LONG?" Jason screams inches from his face as he pushes him back again" I said how long, Clay!?"

"Jeez Jason! How long for what? I have no idea what you're talking about" Clay's mind's a frenzy of thoughts, trying to understand what's going on and why Jason would be doing this.

Jason's seething with anger "How long have you been sleeping with CJ?"

"Woah Jason! Steady there brother!" Ray now steps in between them "What's going on? You need to let him go"

"I need to know!" he glares at Ray his face filled with purple rage

"Jason, know what? What's going on?" Ray frowns

"Him, he's been sleeping with her!"

Ray bites his lip and rubs his neck but doesn't say a word

"Oh..." Clay takes a breath suddenly realising what it is that's upset his team leader "Look, we just met in the bar, I didn't know who she was! That's the truth it just happened." Clay swallows hard as he tries to explain but he can only see the anger growing "I'm sorry, okay! I know it's against some sort of rules, but it wasn't like we knew when it happened. She said she was a secretary"

"Clay shut up, just don't say any more" Ray holds Jason back "Jeez Clay, I told you you'd get burned on this"

Jason then turns on Ray "You knew? You knew he was sleeping with her he frowns hard looking him in the eyes **"** I said _ **DID you KNOW!**_ **?"**

"Jace, just stop it brother! He told you, he didn't know who she was. It's how he said," Ray shakes his head "Jeez Jason, it's not like you and her are still at it. Look man, you need to take a step back. This isn't the right time for this."

As he watches Ray and Jason arguing it suddenly becomes clear to Clay. _It was him! Her sad story. The married guy she told him about. It was Jason!_ "Oh my God, shit it was you!"

"It was me what?" Jason moves closer, grabbing Clay by the neck of his shirt just as Sonny arrives back from medical. He'd been there to get his arm dressed from the intravenous line earlier "Woah! Hold on there boss, what the hell's G.Q done now?"

Clay looks at Sonny and sighs, _I really wish they would stop calling me that_

Sonny looks at Ray "Oh shit, he knows about them? I told you I should have put an end to that. Fuck! You know what, we should have fucking left her there. she's always been trouble and I knew this was gunna happen."

Jason turns on Sonny "So, you knew as well? You all knew, but none of you thought to say anything or even put an end to it?"

"Jason come on, man! What the hell were we supposed to do? You know what he's like. He'd have never of listened, not without telling him the truth!"

Jason's still seething, but Clay decides he's not taking it anymore and retaliates by pushing Jason hard in the chest. Jason grabs him by the collar again and shoves him back "Now listen to me. This ends right now! Do you understand me? It's not happening! She is _NOT_ available to you do you comprende?"

Clay pushes Jason away "Get the fuck off me. Who the hell do you think you are? This is nothing to do with you!"

"Oh, it has _EVERYTHING_ to do with me! You and her, it's over! You back the hell off!" Once again Jason's only inches from his face as Blackburn, with Davis in tow, appears at the door. "WHAT the _HELL i_ s going on here?" he looks around at everyone "Take a seat, gentlemen." he waits as no one moves " I said take a seat, now! That's an order."

Clay and Jason are glaring at each other. Sonny looks at Ray "Fuck! I knew this was gonna get out of hand, this is what she does"

Jason's still pacing trying to calm down. Blackburn's watching him. He's getting annoyed by his lack of discipline "Master Chief, I won't say it again... SIT DOWN! Let's get this de- brief started"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay can't wait to be out of there. He needs some fresh air. He needs to clean. He needs to sleep. But first he wants to get to the Hospital on the other side of the base, to see how she's doing.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Finally awake she's laying, semi-conscious, in the hospital bed just staring at the ceiling. She has several intravenous lines of varying drugs and pain killers attached to her arms. They've cleaned her up but the bruising all over her is much more obvious, and she still has no color in her face. She might be a little more pain free now but she's still not in a good way.

"Hey!" she manages to force a smile as Clay stands in the doorway

"Hey there!" he smiles "How're you doing?"

She nods. "I'm alive so that's a start! And um.. I have this stuff.." she looks at the morphine pump in her hand "so um.. you the pains a little more under control. But ..I'm still pretty uncomfortable. You okay?"

The Doctor dealing with her care, knocks and enters the room "Oh..." she looks at Clay ""I'll come back later"

He's still unwashed from the mission, with his combat gear on. "No, it's okay, I'm gonna go, I need to get cleaned up, I just wanted to come here first to check on her."

"It's fine" CJ beckons the doctor into the room. But the doctor looks uncomfortable and reluctant to speak

"I think under the circumstances, I should come back"

"No please, it's fine" C.J's voice is weak, it's dry from the tube she had in her throat earlier

"Really, I think I should just come back"

" I'm too tired to argue so just speak...please. It's okay, I trust him. You can say whatever you need to" Clay and C.J exchange looks and Clay smiles.

The Doctor sighs "Well just for the record, I'm not comfortable with this, but if you insist"  
She reluctantly proceeds "From our initial assessments, it appears that you have severe deep tissue bruising. The sustained nature of the injuries will mean a prolonged recovery period. The fractures and the broken rib, which we did pin during surgery, are of concern. Being honest brutally honest, you are very lucky to be here." She pauses "Therefore having taken everything into account and the time required to heal. I'm sorry to say I will be signing you off active duty for the foreseeable future. We will coordinate a treatment plan. But it's going to be a long process"

CJ frowns. Oh no!. No please, can't you define the period. Just give me a date and I'll get there" she shakes her head. This news is her worst nightmare.

"Look, I'm sure you're determined and with time ... but you do need to allow yourself to heal, not only from the physical injuries but also the knock-on effects mentally that something like this can have. I'm sure once you recover fully, and pass the psych evaluations you will be fine to continue, or maybe going forward a different role"

C.J shakes her head and rolls her eyes. "Shit no!" she runs her hand through her hair. She knows getting signed back on to duty after this is going to be tough.

"Look take the positives, from what we can see there's no lasting, internal damage as such..." she breaks off still hesitant to continue with Clay here.

Clay looks up, first looking at C.J then at the Doctor "As such? What does that mean? And, what about the blood loss? You didn't mention what caused that, I mean, you said no internal damage. But there was so much blood."

The Doctor shuffles her papers in the file. She pauses before answering "Look, I know you guys doing what you do are close, but... are you sure you want me to continue? I think it might be better if we were one on one"

C.J sighs and shakes her head. "Please, whatever it is just say it." she doesn't care about anything now she's still thinking about the psych evaluations. Clay looks at the Doctor and her reluctance to speak

"Should I leave?"

"Maybe..." The doctor nods "... under the circumstances, that might be for the best.

"Oh, for God sake, just say whatever it is. I'm too tired for bullshit right now"

The Dr coughs she' can see how agitated CJ is getting "Very well. _If_ you insist?" She looks down at her notes clipped to the front of her file. Then she swallows hard taking her time before she speaks "Were you um ... aware that you were pregnant, before you deployed?"

There's a sudden silence in the room as no one speaks.

C.J looks at Clay. She rubs her head in confusion "Wait what! Why the hell would you ask that?" C.J closes her eyes trying to think "Sorry what? What did you just?" She wonders if it's the drugs as she tries to sit herself up to hear. She suddenly feels the pain and she grimaces and gives up trying to move "I'm sorry I don't understand. Pregnant? Me?"

Clay frowns. He's confused as well "She's pregnant?" Clay turns and stares at C.J "What the hell! And you deployed on this op?" he's in total disbelief "What the hell's wrong with you, why would you do that?"

"No, no, I didn't know. I can't be pregnant. I mean... I ...no, no this is not happening. How can I be? I was taking birth control. I mean..." she frowns and closes her eyes trying to think "I didn't know. Sorry I'm not understanding, how can I be pregnant?"

"How the hell could someone like you be this stupid?" Clay's fuming. He doesn't understand why, other than the shock of the news "How did you let this happen?"

C.J sits in silence trying to gather her thoughts "I.. I don't know how this happened."

"You say you had birth control, did you have any periods where you might have been sick, taking antibiotics, maybe drinking and just forgot to take them on time?"

She thinks back to the days at the beginning with Clay, when they first met. When they spent those first days drinking. She remembers now it was all a muddle and perhaps she did forget "Yeah, um... maybe there was" she looks at Clay "that first week. I mean,... we weren't exactly careful"

"No, I wasn't, because I thought you took care of all that. I mean, I didn't think I needed to be"

"We were drinking, a lot, that week. I guess I must have forgotten"  
CJ puts her head back trying to think and take it in " Seriously, you know what it was like. All that drinking and...and look I'm sorry. I need a minute; I can't get my head round this!"

Clay looks at the Doctor "So what now? I mean you're saying she's having a baby, so what do we do now?"

The Doctor lowers her eyes and shakes her head "No sorry. I think you misunderstood. You're not pregnant now. You miscarried. I'm sorry, the injuries to you were too severe. With a very early pregnancy like that. I'm sorry, we couldn't do anything to save it. By the time they brought you in, it was already too late"

C.J closes her eyes. She's really confused "I don't feel so good! _Aahhhhh!_ " she gasps in pain

"Look, I'll come back and we can talk more later." she rests her hand on " You really need to rest. I'll send someone with some more pain relief, make you more comfortable. Just press the button if you need anything"

She looks at Clay as she leaves "I'm sorry" she smiles apologetically, placing her hand on his arm. Clay stands silent. His mind's in shock as he paces the room.

He's thinking about the length of their relationship "So was it mine?" For some reason he's really angry with her "I don't get it, how the hell could you be so stupid? Jeez, surely you should've been more careful"

head is spinning. She can't get a grip on what she's just been told. She doesn't answer him, just continues to lay there looking dazed and confused. "I don't know... I .. I just..."

She tries to move but the pain shoots through her body "Clay…" she can see him pacing and tries to reach out to him "Clay listen to me." it takes every bit of energy she has to get her words out. "Clay you need to calm down! _Aaaarrrrrghh!_ " suddenly a pain tears through her as she tries to adjust position. The piercing sound of her pain makes him stop pacing and he finally looks at her.

"Clay you can't mention this to anyone. Do you hear me? Please don't say anything to anyone. We need to keep this between us. Can we do that?" she's not sure if he's listening

"Why? What cos you don't want Jason to find out?"

She swallows hard and just stares at him "What?" she sighs "You know? About me and Jason" she frowns "Has he said something to you?"

"Yeah you could say that. " he takes a deep breath " Warned me off. Told me to stay away from you. You'd think there was something still going on the way he carried on. Is there? Is there something still going on with you?"

"No!" she shakes her head "No, there isn't. Jason and me, we're done. Clay, it was a long time ago"

"Right... oh and there's that thing about your Father, yeah thanks for telling me about that too! You know it would have helped when I came face to face with him."

"Clay..." she rubs her forehead. She's so tired now "Clay, I couldn't. The thing with my father, it's complicated.. it's..."

"You know what CJ; I can't do this with you right now!" He's so angry with her and he can't explain why. "I gotta get my head around all this, I need some air!"

He storms out of the room, slamming the door shut. Maybe it's the stress of the mission, or that he's tired, dirty and hungry but all of this has come at him out of nowhere, but he's too emotionally drained to deal with it.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She opens her eyes again to find a man in full Naval uniform standing over her bed "Oh at last!" He smiles "You're awake Lieutenant, what time do you call this."

"Hey" she relaxes and smiles "Admiral Lewis, Sir. What can I do for you?" she rolls her eyes and smiles again as he kisses her forehead. "Hey daddy, how long have you been there?"

"Not long. How are you doing?"

"Yeah, I'm okay!"

"I thought we might have lost you there, Lieutenant"

"Hey, you know I'm not that easy to get rid of, right." she keeps smiling at her father. She's so glad, after everything, to see him and she takes hold of his hand

"Do you need anything?"

"No! No, I'm fine" she sighs "Well... maybe a flight home. I'm not sure if you know anyone who could pull some strings and get me on one?"

They both smile. "Well we'll have to see what we can do there, I'll have a word, see how quickly we can get you back" he kisses her forehead again "I have to leave soon. I have a meeting in Washington, but I just wanted to know you were alright before I leave"

Jason enters the doorway but seeing the Admiral he automatically turns on his heels to leave. "Master Chief Hayes!" the Admiral has sensed him there and turns to face him "Did you want a moment with the Lieutenant?"

"Um...not if I'm intruding, Sir. I can wait"

The Admiral sniffs "Look, I have briefing to attend before I catch my flight" he looks at C.J "I'll give you two a moment" he nods at C.J "I'll see you when you get back. I'll arrange that medical transfer"

"Thank you!" she grips his hand tight and smiles "I love you!" she mouths

He nods "Me too. " he nods as he turns looking again at Jason "Don't stay too long Mr Hayes, she's still very tired" he kisses her head again "So best not to overstay your welcome."

As he turns to leave he puts out his hand out to shake Jason's "Well done on a successful operation Master Chief. Those women's loved ones will appreciate your efforts, I'm sure and I'll pass on my congratulations to your Commander"

CJ smiles at Jason. They both know that's the most approval from the Admiral Jason's going to get "Thank you Sir, I appreciate that"

"This no way means you're forgiven!" he leans in griping Jason's hand hard " You hurt my daughter again, and you will see the full force of my reach. Are we clear?"

"We're clear."

"I need to go" he turns to look at CJ "I'm warning the both of you. I do not want any repeats of the past. There won't be any favors a second time." he stares hard at Jason "You know; others may have blamed my daughter but me... I lay the blame firmly with you, you understand me?"

"Yes sir!"

"Dad, that's enough now. It's done. There's nothing going on now."

"As long as that's true. Now, get some rest. I'll call you later"

"Sir!"

He walks out leaving them alone together. CJ shakes her head and looks at Jason "Sorry." she lays her hand on the bed to reach out to him and he takes her hand gently stroking it.

"So how are you?"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay sees the Admiral walk down the corridor, as he comes back in from getting some air. He's had time to clear his head and calm down. He now he realises he owes her an apology. Before he heads back to do that he squats down against the wall, taking a moment, he puts his head down to think about what he's going to say.  
That's when he hears the clear-cut English voice at the desk. He looks up and there at the reception is a face he recognises "Brent Reagan?"

The receptionist looks up to be greeted by the tall blonde-haired stranger "Can I help you?"

"Yes I'm sure you can. I've come to see a friend, Catherine Lewis. Stupidly, I've forgotten which room. Would you be a gem and let me have it to save me going back to my car to get the email?" he smiles again at the receptionist.

She's mid phone call and a nurse is asking her for a folder, it's really busy in the reception area. All she hears is his accent which makes her smile and focuses her attention on him "Sorry what?"

"Busy aren't you!" He smiles again. She nods. His charm offensive is working, and she taps the details into the computer "What was the name?"

"Catherine, Lieutenant Catherine Lewis, she's a friend from the Navy. She was brought in this afternoon" he flashes his security pass at her

"Sure it's, Room 206. Second floor, up the stairs and to the right down the corridor" she smiles

"Thank you so much. Have a great day!"

As he turns to leave he spots Clay perched on the floor. Clay keeps his eyes on him, sliding up the wall until he's standing upright. "How the hell did he get on the base?"

Luckily for Clay none of BRAVO had a chance to change after the briefing, so he still has his comms radio attached. "Bravo 1 this is Bravo 6 do you copy"

Jason's still pissed with Clay, so he takes a moment before he decides to respond "BRAVO 6 this is Bravo 1. Copy"

"Where are you?"

He hesitates before he snaps back annoyed that Clay's asking "Second floor. I'm with C.J Why?"

"Stay there. I think we have a problem. Brent Reagan, he's in the hospital."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

 **Chapter 6: He got to her**

Jason looks at C.J she's still sleeping but sensing his presence watching her she opens her eyes "What's wrong?" she frowns at the look on his face

"Nothing" he smiles. One of the Doctors walks past the room and Jason goes to the corridor "Is she fit to move?"

The Doctor checks in the doorway "Ms Lewis?, No, no not really. They've only just stabilized her. Is there a reason you need to move her?"

"I don't know I just wanted to know if she can be moved" he looks concerned and she tries to sit herself up. But there's too much pain and she stays slumped where she is

"Bravo 6 this is BRAVO 1 do we have a Sit rep?"

"Bravo 1 I'm looking for him now, I lost him in the corridor. I don't know how he got on the base"

"Copy that. Get hold of the others. Get them up here. She can't be moved, so I'll stay with her"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Davis.." Jason calls her directly "We've got a situation at the hospital. We need it locked down. We think Reagan's coming after CJ"

"Okay Jason, I'm on it"

Clay takes the stairs to second floor, running down the corridor to her room. The team are all gathered there as he bursts in "We have a problem" Clay's catching his breath "Reagan's in the hospital, but I lost in. He was asking about CJ."

"We need to find him. If he was involved in what happen to her. Then I wanna find him first! Brock take the Dog, see if he can get a trace on him take Clay with you"

"Trent, you stay with her, in case she needs medical assistance. You don't leave her." he looks him directly in the face "Do you understand me, that's an order!"  
Jason hands him his pistol "It's loaded use it. This guy is ex special forces don't underestimate him "

"Ray you're with me. Sonny you go with Clay and Brock. Let's do sweep, flush this rat out!" they all nod "Stay alert, what I said, he's armed, and he knows his stuff"

"We'll take the dog down to the 1st floor, l see if he pick up the scent from there and work our way up"

C.J tries to sit up. "Awww! Fuck!" she cries out in pain. She just feels so useless lying there in the bed

"Hey..." Trent tries to calm her "just try to sit still if you can"

"I wanna know what's going on?"

"I know but we're not sure at the moment, we're waiting on an update"

"Are you covering something up? A _www! Ahhh! Oh Shit!_ Trent, did Jason tell you not to tell me?" she grimaces with pain "Trent I wanna know what's going on"

"Are you in more pain?"

"I guess" She nods "It's worse than it was earlier more intense. _Aahhhhh! ….Oh God!"_ she grimaces as she tries to breath, taking deep breaths with each wave as it passes over her.

"Let's have a look at you." Trent tries to make an assessment about what's causing the increase in pain. "You were doing okay. You're getting stress, you need to try and relax"

"Trent, please tell me what's going on"

"Look, just relax it's not helping you getting upset. Jason's got it in control. Now, just lie still"

She closes her eyes. The pain is burning through her body now " _aahhhhh! OH GOD!_ Oh Trent, I can't do this" She sees Trent looking at the empty morphine bag. "They were supposed to be coming to change that... earlier" she breathes deeply

"Okay, let's see what time they changed it. I don' t know how long you've been without pain relief" he's worried as he picks up her notes.  
C.J opens her eyes again as that wave of pain subsides. He starts scanning through the notes to find what he's looking for. Then he suddenly stops reading and looks up, staring at her. This look comes over his face. She closes her eyes as she realises he now knows what is says in her notes, about the miscarriage. Her eyes well up with tears but she can't look at him.

Trent sighs, he nods at her "Well I guess that explains that then" he shakes his head. That's all he says, and he doesn't mention it again as he puts the notes back on the end of the bed. "So, where's the pain worst"

she puts her hand just below rib cage and then he gently follows her guide placing his hands on her stomach "Okay, I don't know what's going on, but I need to get you some more morphine. You're not gonna cope for long without any pain relief" He frowns thinking about what to do "Just hang tough! I'll get what you need" He smiles as he contacts Jason on the radio mic.

"Bravo 1 this is bravo 4 I'm gonna need to get some pain relief ASAP, she's out. Can you send someone back to watch over her Copy"?

"Copy that Bravo 4. How long can you hold?"

He looks at C.J with a questioning look. She heard the message and nods "I'm okay for now"

"Not long. But holding for now. Will update" He sighs rubbing his head working out his next move. The drugs cupboard is at the end of the corridor. "CJ, you let me know when you don't think you can cope anymore and then I'll go get what you need" he gulps "I won't leave unless you tell me you're not coping!"

She nods

"Hopefully one of the others will be back by then" he smiles "Just try and breath through it"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"He has to be here I can feel it"

Ray nudges Jason and points up. In the corner of the corridor there are security cameras. "Looks like there's one every corridor. Maybe we can get Davis to look at the security footage, show us where he is?"

Jason nods "HAVOC this is BRAVO 1, Davis can you access the hospital security cameras see if we can pick him up"

She starts going through the footage nothing so far then she notices the 3rd floor cameras are offline "BRAVO 1 this is HAVOC the 3rd floor cameras are offline. He could have disabled them. Copy"

"Copy that. BRAVO 6 think he might be third floor meet you there"

"Copy that we on the way. 6 out"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Trent keeps monitoring C.J. Her pain is getting worse and her blood pressure is going up.

"Trent...Awww!...I'm...I'm not gonna be able to hold out much longer" her cheeks are puffing as she pants. Screwing her face up

"Okay let me think. BRAVO 1 this is BRAVO 4 I need to get those drugs. She can't hold out now. Her blood pressures not good copy"

"Bravo 4 copy" Jason sighs, everything is coming at him at once now "Bravo 6 you need to get back to second floor"

Clay taps Sonny on the shoulder "I have to go back"

Sonny nods "I'll meet them on the third. Go!"

Clay leaps over the handrail of the stairs and drops down a floor at a time

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

 _"Aahhhhh. GOD!"_ The pain searing through every fibre of her body now making her head dizzy " _Oh Jeez..."_ she grimaces "Trent I'm sorry I can't do this, I need something!" she clings to his arm, digging her nails into the skin on his hand as she tries desperately to breath.

" Okay, okay, I'll sort it" he sighs. He rubs his head trying to decide on the best thing to do. As he looks back at her, she's drifting in and out of consciousness. He checks her SATS and she's not good. He closes his eyes _Okay! I'll have to make a move. Clay's on way back._ He reassures himself

He hurries down to the end of the corridor. Finding the door its locked it takes him a few kicks to get it open. Frantically he searches the supplies for what he needs. _There, the locked drugs box. Morphine's bound to be in there_ _  
_He finds a wrench laid on the side and he uses it to break the lock off "BINGO" two morphine pouches, he takes both _Pheww!_

Then he stops dead in his tracks as he hears the heart wrenching scream down the corridor from CJs room

"SHIT!" He turns back and runs the length of the hallway as fast as he can.

Clay's at the top of the stairs when he hears the scream "Oh no! NO! No, no ..."  
As he gets to the top of the stairs, Reagan pushes past him and for one split second he has to decide which way to go. Follow him down or up to the sound of the scream.

"Bravo 1 this is BRAVO 6 he's heading downstairs to the ground floor. Something's happened. I'm checking sitrep COPY "

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay arrives in the doorway. He stands fixed to the spot at the scene. "Oh God No!"

CJs sitting on the side of the bed, her eyes wide, the color completely drained from her face as she has her hand on her waist. She can't speak. Her gown covered in blood from what looks like a knife wound.

Clay is at the door "SHIT! No! CJ... Oh God no!"

Behind him Trent makes it back. He stops for a moment assessing the scene _Oh God! Why the hell did I leave her?_

She collapses on the floor and Trent shoves Clay out of the way as he starts giving assistance. Clay's in a daze "Clay! Clay, snap out of it and help me!" Trent grabs him. "Put pressure on there!"

"BRAVO 1 this is 6

Downstairs on the first floor, Jason gets the message through from Clay "It's not good. He got to her Copy" He already has Reagan cornered. This is what Jason has been hoping for. "COPY. that Bravo 6 …" Jason stares at Reagan "Well, it's just you and me now. Time for some pay back"


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 7: She's staying with me Chapter Text

The medics rush the trolley out of the door.  
Clay's sitting back on his heels, on the floor, covered in blood. Trent's slumped against the wall, his head in his, blood covered, hands.

Jason drops his cable tied bundle at the corridor wall. "Watch him! He moves you shoot him."

Sonny nods at his boss's command. He kicks the guy on the ground, then looks at Ray "Jesus, what the hell did Jason do to him? He looks like he's been ten rounds in a boxing ring"

The cable tied Reagan smirks.

"Don't look at me!" Sonny frowns but Brent smiles again " I said _don't_ look at me" again he ignores him. He just keeps smiling until eventually, Sonny turns away.

Jason's at the doorway of her room. He shakes his head, looking at the scene in front of him.

In the past hour they'd spent the time looking for Reagan, Jason had left Trent in charge of looking after her but he'd had to leave to go fetch her some pain relief, when hers ran out. She was in agony. But, in the few minutes it took for him to get to the drugs cupboard, it was enough time for Reagan to get to her, plunge knife into her flesh and escape down the stairwell. Unfortunately, it didn't work for him when Jason caught him on in the corridor. And now the color of his face was testament to what followed.

Jason looks around the room. The floor is covered in large pools of dark red blood. He looks at Clay on his knees as Trent slowly stands up  
"I'm so sorry"

Jason swallows hard trying to hold his anger back **"I gave you an order. STAY WITH HER!"** he screams at Trent.

Clay looks up, he would defend Trent from the outburst he's about to receive but he can't, he can't because he wants to scream the same thing.

"Jason!" Rays calm voice of reason "Don't, not now."

Jason runs his hands through his hair. He can't breathe "I need to get out of here. I can't even be angry with you right now" he glares at Trent; his head is spinning so much.

"Jason I'm so sorry." Trent hangs his head in shame

Ray roughly grabs Reagan, dragging him to his feet "You...get up! "

Clay gets up, while looking at his blood red hands. He'd come rushing up the stairs when he heard her scream. They tried so desperately to stop the bleeding, but he doesn't know if they've done enough to save her. He turns around to the doorway and he can see Reagan smiling at him. His anger rages through his body, and he loses it, charging into him.

"Woah! Woah, woah! "Sonny puts his hand on Clay's shoulder pulling him back. "Steady there Blondie! We'll deal with him later"

Clay pulls away. "If she dies then... then I swear to god, I'll kill you with my bare hands"

Reagan just smiles and doesn't say a word.

Clay's fuming but he can't speak and pulling from Sonny's grip he heads off down the corridor.

Ray looks at Sonny as he pushes Reagan along with the butt of gun "Move asshole" Sonny shoves him again

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The quiet calm of the corridor outside the operating theatre. Jason just sits with his head in his hands as Clay wanders down towards him.  
He's still looking at the blood on his hands _I should have washed my hands._ He lets out and exhausted sigh as he slumps down the wall onto the floor.

Jason watches him from the corner of his eye, but doesn't t say a word. He puts his head back in his hands and sighs too.

The time passes and they've been sat there for a good four hours. Neither has moved or spoken a word to each other. Clay just quietly picking the straps on his helmet with Jason just sighing and rubbing his head every now and again.

The there's a sudden clatter of doors which makes Jason and Clay look up. The Doctor comes out and takes off his theater hat. Jason closes his eyes as he relives the moments again when Alana died. He only opens them again as the doctor begins to speak.

"She's stable."

There is an obvious sigh of relief from both of them. "Thank God" Clay says to himself

"We stopped the bleed. It's um... still touch and go, the next 48hrs are critical" He touches Jason's arm reassuringly "But it looks good, it wasn't as bad as we thought. But she was quite weak"

Jason nods. He gets up and totally ignoring Clay he walks off. "I need a shower"

Jason closes the shower room door with a slow click, then runs some water in the sink. He puts his head in his hands before he splashes water on his face. He lets out a long sigh, then he leans his head back on the wall and shuts his eyes as the tiredness of the past few days consumes him.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They all return to the USA aboard special medical flight Admiral Lewis has arranged to get his daughter home. She's taken straight to Virginia Beach hospital. She's still unconscious but so far she's stable.

o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay unzips his jacket and takes off his shirt off. He stands in front of the mirror and lets out a long-tired sigh. The apartment is too quiet for his liking.

Her T-shirt lies over the back of the chair and he picks it up, sniffing it before he collapses down in a heap on to the couch. Before he knows it his tiredness overwhelms him, and he falls asleep.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

It's over a week since they arrived back, and they have been spun up again for two days. Clay can't wait to get back.  
Blackburn promised he would update if anything serious happened, but Clay doubted his word on this. He certainly knew Jason wouldn't tell him.

There was an uneasy truce within the team.

They'd all done their jobs to perfection but that's what they trained to do, but the normal team banter was limited, and it made for an uneasy tension.

Clay kept himself away from Jason as much as was physically possible. He could tell Sonny was hating it. Ray was playing peacemaker and the others just kept their heads down. Trent was walking on eggshells and Jason was certainly giving him hell whenever he could.

Clay replayed the scenario over and over in his head. Truthfully he admitted to himself Trent was in a no win. He'd done what thought was best for her based on the situation in front of him.  
Clay had thought many times about how he would have reacted, forced to listen to her cry in pain, or risk leaving her for that couple of minutes. He couldn't say in all honesty that he wouldn't have gone

They land and he's first off the plane as he heads straight over to the hospital.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Heyyyyy! Oh my god you're awake!" He's so overwhelmed he beams. "How're you doing?"

She smiles back. "I'm okay. Getting there slowly"

Jason stands in the doorway, filling the entire door frame. He fold his arms and smiles at her. The obvious relief washing over him too "You good?"

She smiles & nods in reply "Sore, but I'm okay. You don't get rid of me that easy"

The Doctor ushers them out into the corridor where the rest of the team are waiting. The second doctor stops and talks to Trent. Then Trent enters the room with him.

She smiles at Trent acknowledging him as the doctors all chat some more. Then Trent comes back out to the corridor

"Well considering she was in pretty poor shape before this, she's doing remarkably well. It's a good job she's tough cos she's gonna need that strength to recover"  
He sighs, the guilt is still with him but the fact she's doing so well is a relief. He knows this doesn't make it right with Jason but it's a start  
"They think another week here, and they will sign her out, into care. As long as she keeps improving and as long as she's won't be left alone"

Clay smiles. Sonny looks apprehensively at Ray he can see trouble brewing.

Jason doesn't say a word, he's standing with his arms folded. "Okay, well let's stop standing here and get back to work then"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

 **Back at Jason's house**

Emma's doing her homework on the laptop in her bedroom. Mikey's in his room playing computer games. His mom, Linda, is making something in the kitchen. While Jason's in the bedroom clearing stuff out from the drawers

"What's going on?" Linda comes to the doorway

"Nothing just clearing some room"

"Clearing some room for what? Jason?. Jason, why does it feel like you're up to something I won't like"

He stops and looks at her "I'm not up to anything" he sees she doesn't believe him by the look on her face "Okay you're right. You're not gonna like it much but …well there isn't any choice"  
He stops to see her disapproving expression the he coughs awkwardly before he speaks  
"C.J, she's has been hurt and um..." he pauses for her reaction "she can possibly get out, next week, from hospital. But only if she's signed into care and…. " he stops

"C.J?... _That_ C.J?"

"Um .. yeah" he swallows hard

"And? You're thinking what? Oh my god! Jason, you better not be thinking what I think you are?"

"Well I thought, you know...she could come here. I'll take the couch or Mikey's room with him. She can come in here"

"You thought WHAT?! Son, I've seen you do some stupid things for that woman, but this."

"Look mom I know it's not ideal bu.."

"NOT IDEAL! Jason are you crazy? You want to bring _that_ woman into your home, your kids' home. My god, this is Alana's house and Alana's ROOM! For god's sake, what the hell are you thinking? You know. it's like that woman warps your brain"  
Her voice is raised you can defiantly tell where Jason gets his temper. "NO!"

"Look it's my house so I can do.."

"NO! Jason. I said NO! to this! The children have not so long back lost their mother" she stops "I seriously can't believe you're considering this Well I'm telling you; you bring her here and I'll take the kids out... Do you understand me?"

He lets out a long deep sigh. He has never seen his Mom so furious with him. Well actually that's a lie. He has. The afternoon she arrived early to stay for the weekend. The afternoon he had sneaked C.J into their home for the night while Alana was at her parents with the kids. Yeah she was pretty damn furious with him then.

Emma comes to the doorway she's heard the shouting "What's going on?"

"Nothing sweetheart" her Gran smiles at her "Your dad's just not thinking straight at the moment but nothing for you to worry about"

"I need to bring a team member here to stay. They're hurt and need to recover just for a while" he hopes Emma's caring nature will get her on his side

"One of the team is hurt. Who?" the concern in her voice showing.

His mom gives him a sour look "Don't you dare drag the kids into this."

"Who?" Emma asks again, she's worried "Which one of the team is hurt?"

"Well um... _she's_ not exactly part of the team, but it's a work thing. She got hurt, so she needs to be looked after for a while that's all"

" **She?** A woman. What woman?" Emma's baffled. She's never heard of a woman on their team, only Lisa

His mother bites her lip "It's Okay sweetie go back to your studies; your Dad will think of something else" She reassures her "We don't have the room anyway"

Emma looks at her gran she's never heard her Gran raise her voice to her Dad before, so she knows there is more to this than they are letting on.

"NO Jason! NO! I'm warning you."  
She's quieter in her tone now because of the children. She stares hard at him "I won't tolerate this. I'm warning you"

She walks away as he sighs and sits on the bed "Shit!" _That means she's gonna have to stay with Clay like he wanted!...Damn!_

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

"Steady, mind the door"

She is hopping and grimacing as she turns in the door to Clay's apartment. Her arm draped round his waist as Ray brings the bags behind.

Trent gets the drug and medical bag and brings in. He starts unloading the contents to Clay's kitchen with his notes. Jason isn't saying much standing in the doorway with his arms folded as normal. He turns and looks at Sonny who's in the corridor.

"I can't understand why she couldn't be shipped back to Washington to her folks" Sonny shakes his head "Jason why would you insist on this?"

Sonny, knew this was only gonna end in tears. "I don't know why you don't let her be their problem not Bravo's" he frowns as Jason looks at him "but then, I'm not in charge. But I have to sa this ... this is dumbest idea you've had"

"You say something Sonny?"

"Me, boss? Nope! Why would I say anything."?

"You got a problem with this " Jason turns questioning him his arms still folded

He shrugs and closes his eyes "And you haven't?"

Jason glares "So what, you're questioning my decision?"

Sonny shrugs "Nope. I'm Just statin' facts!"

Clay gets her settled in the bed as Trent gives her a painkilling injection. Jason sticks a pillow and blanket on the couch.

"You take the couch" Trent stares at Clay. He looks up at Jason then back to Clay again. It's as if Trent he has already been told what to say. Clay looks puzzled "We have to mind the wound. No accidentally knocking it" Trent explains.

"Fair enough" Clay smiles as he glances at Jason and back to Trent he knows where this has come from.

"Hey golden boy, this what you think. You know it can't happen now. If I let her stay here with you then you sleep on the couch!"

"Okay fine, I'll take the couch, for now" he stares at Jason

Jason comes over "Hey, understand this. There's rules and you and her it can't happen anymore"

"Sure, I get it"

Ray looks at Sonny who shakes his head "Like I said, stupid idea! Okay so is she done?"

" Yup." Trent smiles

"Beer it is then." He smiles, he's been waiting for this and he wants to see Davis. _We getting outta this atmosphere thank god!_ He goes to leave but Jason hauls him back. Pulling a beer pack out of the cooler he's carrying.

"Take out?! Are you serious? I thought Blondie there was babysitting... Oh man this sucks!"

Ray smiles to himself as Clay's face drops. If Clay thought he was getting her to himself he has another think coming. Ray's still smiling but realizes that Sonny's right this is probably only going to end in tears.

They've all crammed on the couch watching football. Sonny's on the floor. Trent is checking her meds and she's sleeping.

"Okay, I've given enough pain killers for the night. The rest are on the side for the morning. I'm gonna head off for a bit, but I'm on call for any problems and I'll be back first thing."  
He reassures everyone, it's not like he has any choice, anyway, he's been given his orders. He's having to pull out all the stops to get back in Jason's good books.

"Okay, I think we're good" Clay nods

Ray gets up "I'll come down with you I wanna get off so I can see the kids before bed." He looks at Jason who's standing in the bedroom doorway looking at her sleeping. He still pissed she's here and not at his.

Jason finally acknowledges the fact that he will have to go, and he takes a more commanding tone "Okay remember what I said about the couch" he sighs "Right, well we'll leave you to it. Any problems let us know. You get Trent for anything... _anything._ I mean it I won't be disobeyed this time"

Clay's just happy to close the door on them. There's peace in the apartment with them all gone.

She was sleeping but has now opened her eyes. "You good?" he asks quietly "CJ are you awake?" he frowns, she's not she's just drifting in and out " You just rest" Trent has drugged her up with painkillers for the night so she quite out of it but she does manage to nod.

He picks up the empty beer bottles and puts them in the trash before getting settled on the couch. "I'll do as I'm told for tonight" He smiles and falls asleep

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She wakes up with Clay laid beside her on the bed. There's a pillow laid between them. She smooths it with her hand wondering why it's there

"Morning" Clay says stroking her hair. He sees her looking at the pillow "Oh that?...Just a precaution so I didn't knock your wound if I fell asleep" he smiles

She nods.

"You want a coffee"

She nods again "Please!" she smiles "You know I can't believe how tired I still am" It seems so quiet now after all the drama of the past few weeks and she settles back into her pillow and closes her eyes.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

In what seems no time she opens her eyes again to find Trent fussing around her with medical stuff. He's looking at the wound and changing dressings. While Jason's stood in the bedroom doorway with his arms folded watching her.

She laughs

"What funny?" He frowns at her

"You, every time I wake up you're stood there watching me like that" she smiles. She can see Ray and Sonny walking around behind him "What's going on? How long have I been asleep?" she's confused "And why are you all here at this time?" She reaches for her phone to check the time "Oh crap it's later than I thought. Another day has gone by, and I feel like I'm losing all track of time"

Trent smiles "It'll be the painkillers you've been out of it for a bit"

"Yeah I suppose. So, what's going on?"

"We're moving you. We just got a call we getting spun up"

"Moving to where?"

"Naima's gonna watch you while we gone" Jason answers

"What?! Naima is? No! No, I'm good. I'll stay here. You ll only be gone a couple of days for sure. I can't stay with Naima" she frowns "Jason... you know she won't want me there"

"Yeah she will. Anyway, it's all organized"

 _Oh my god this can't happen_ She tries to catch Ray's attention. "Ray!"

He frowns as he looks at her "Its fine." he knows exactly what she's thinking "She said it was okay" he tries to reassure her when in his head he has serious doubts that this is a good idea, and he omits to repeat the names Naima called her. How much persuading it took?  
None of the other wives would entertain the idea. It was only really when Jason asked her, or told her, there was no choice that she very reluctantly agreed.

 _"I don't want that woman near me or my family. All the hurt she caused. Alana was my best friend!"  
_ But somehow Jason talked her around and she said she would do it for his sake.

"She may have said its fine because she wouldn't want to let you down" CJ panics at the thought of spending time with a woman who hates her.

 _Oh this is so wrong. I have to get out of this!_ "Look she has kids it's all too much. look... I'll go back to the hospital"  
Even that was preferable to staying with Rays wife.

Trent shrugs "That's an option, but it's Jason's call not mine. Well unless you _need_ to go"

"No! she's going to stay with Naima. She will take care of her" Jason interjects

"Oh god!" CJ closes her eyes at the thought. She thinks back to what happened that night with Ray. "Oh Shit!"

 _She thinks back to how drunk they were, so, so drunk and how meaningless that one night was. It was a huge one-off mistake._  
 _One that would eat Ray with guilt until this day._

 _It just happened out of nowhere. He was emotionally vulnerable and in a bad place that night. They had an operation go badly wrong_

 _He just wanted to go home and relax but at the time all Naima could obsess about was babies. Having babies. Getting pregnant and he just couldn't handle another night of that, not that night.  
_  
 _So, they sat in the bar and they talked, and they drank. They talked for hours about his love of Naima but her obsession with getting pregnant and their problems._ _  
_  
_He opened up that it was getting to him. He couldn't' relax when he was home because of all the baby talk. When they made love, it was all about getting pregnant, not love or even just sex for sex sake. There had to be a plan, a time and a position._

 _The more they talked the more they drank. Oh God, they drank waayyyy too much drink that night._

 _On her part Jason had told her he was gonna leave Alana that night. Though it actually terrified her. The thought of having him all to herself. Was she ready to be so grown up?  
She followed him home to check he actually went through with it. But stupidly she mistook their goodbye embraces to mean he hadn't done it! Truth was he had already told her._

 _So, she hit the bar to drown her sorrows. She drowned her sorrows with Ray._

 _Then when they left the keys accidentally dropped on the floor and they both bent down to fetch them. They knocked heads as they picked them up and they started laughing._

 _She remembers how hard they were laughing, and he rubbed her head while they were laughing. He kissed her head better and then... then it just went further, and they were kissing for real._ _  
_  
_It all just happened in a blur. It was never supposed to happen. There was nothing there between them. They were just two friends who had been shooting the breeze and who ended up kissing and that kissing lead to an intense fuck. She sighed at the thought of the whole thing._

 _She didn't see how it was about to backfire on her or she would have sent him home. She didn't know people has seen what had happened and though Jason never knew who it was he would still never forgive her for what she did._

So, there is no way now that she can stay with Ray's wife, Alana's best friend. But it doesn't look like any choices as Trent helps her stand up to get dressed.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The awkwardness when she enters Naima's home. She could tell right then that she had only agreed to this under duress. Jason would have ordered this. C.J closes her eyes and sighs

"Thanks for doing this"

"You're fine. It's always good to help if I can" Naima pauses composing herself " Jason knows that" she looks at him. He's the one pressured her into this

"Okay then ladies we'll leave you to It. We need to be back at base" feeling the abrasive tensions Jason claps his hands together and can't wait to leave.

Clay can see the awkwardness in face "I'll be back soon OK?" She nods as he kisses her on the cheek. It's not the way he wants to kiss her but with everyone standing there watching he can't do anymore.

Jason also kisses her on the top the head "Behave and do as Naima tells you" he turns to Naima and nods "Trent left instructions. You are in charge. Don't let her tell you any different"

Ray smiles he kisses the kids before turning to Naima "Thank you"

she smiles nodding. "You owe me big time Ray Perry"

The Guys are gone and there's an awkward silence between the two women.

"Do you want to see my drawing" little one says

"Sure"

She sees the bandage on C.J side "Are you hurt?"

"No, I'm fine" she smiles

"Right kids come on, time to wash up. Mommy will make some dinner" she scoots the kids to the kitchen "I've put you in the kids' room, they can come in with me while Rays away." she has no expression on her face "Oh, and so there are no misunderstanding. I didn't do this for you. This was not a choice!"

CJ gulps "I understand"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They sit to eat at the table and the awkward atmosphere is horrible. C.J keeps looking at phone for the time and to check any messages. She praying this is an in and out Op. _This is not going to happen again for sure._

Neither woman wants to be sat here and CJ breaks the silence "Thanks for this. I know it can't be easy for you". she gives her a sympathetic look.

"Its fine. It had to be so … we just have to live with it for now"

"Well um.. I'm a bit tired. Those painkillers you know. So, if you don't mind I'll um... turn in"

"Sure"

C.J goes to bed. She takes some extra pain killers so she can sleep before she does she checks her phone again _Hopefully they ll be back when I wake up!_

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She sits watching the cartoons on the TV. The kids are playing on the floor. Naima's folding laundry and though she isn't really aware she's doing it she's glaring at C.J the whole time. She's thinking of all the heart-breaking conversations her and Alana had. All the hurt caused and there she was sat on her couch with her children.

 _This isn't happening again. S_ he would make it clear to Jason _This was a one off. I will not babysit that tramp again!_

Naima blinks, and the kids get up as the door opens. She smiles "You're back!"

sleeping. Clay gently bends down and kisses her cheek.

Ray looked at Naima "How's it been?" Naima only had to look at him he knows what she's thinking. He pulls her in for a hug and holds her "I love you!"

"Hey" CJ opens her eyes and smiles relieved. "I'm so glad you're back. Can we get out of here?"

"You wanna go?"

"Do I " she smiles as they gather together her belongings

"Ray, that's not happening again. You make it clear to Jason I'm not doing that again"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay and C.J are on the couch kissing. Like head spinning, mouth to mouth never been kissed, kissing. They have been apart for so long, or that's how it feels.

His hands are all over her breasts feeling and kneading them. He lifts her shirt and despite all the bruising he gently kisses her skin.  
Gently flicking his tongue over her nipple sending a massive sensation through her delicate body.

After all the pain she's suffered recently the excitement of getting pleasure is a welcome relief. They're getting really carried away. Both so turned on things are progressing a little too rapidly.

She grimaces through the pain, but her body aches. She's wanting this pleasure so much that she's willing to bear the pain until she can't, and she has to concede

"Awww! Shit!... Awww!" the pain in her side tears through her and she freezes "Clay STOP!" Her face contorts with pain and frustration and as much as she wants him, and she wants to satisfy his needs "I can't. Sorry, it hurts too much"

"Sorry. Are you okay?" he's worried "Did I hurt you?"

"No, no it's okay. Just give me a minute" she smiles gathering herself. She looks at the worry in his eyes that he thinks he's caused this pain  
"It's okay, really it is "

She soothes his face and reassuringly kisses him. "I want this I do" she nods "I want you! We just have to slow down, that's all" She smiles. She really does want this as much as him "We can carry on I just have to be more careful"

He picks her up and carries her through to the bedroom "It'll be more comfortable here"  
He slowly starts kissing and caressing her again. it's making the pleasure sensations in her body that much more intense. She takes a deep breath " _aahhhhh!_ " she gasps

He looks at her, there are just so many bruises he's not sure how to be gentle enough. Truthfully he doesn't know how to do this without causing her pain and it worries him

She realises what he's thinking. He's probably right this isn't a great idea, but there no way in hell she wants him to stop. "It'll be okay" she nods to reassure him again.

He smiles as gently enters her. She takes as sharp intake of breath as he does and steadies herself against the surge of pain that each thrust of his body inflicts on her. He's strong enough to hold his weight, trying to be gentle but she's still in too much pain.

"Clay..." she shakes her head "Sorry. You'll have to stop!"  
She's as frustrated as him. She wants this so much, but it's really is just too painful. "Lay on your back" she smiles then she carefully straddles her legs either side of him, lowering herself gently on top of his hard cock. She takes a moment getting a grip on the pain and then makes the movements at her own pace. "That's better!"

It's not pain free, but it does ease the pressure and she can get enough movement to start to peak their pleasure. As gently as possible he holds her hips so that he holds her body tighter against him so he can get deeper inside her warmth.

They take it slow. He can see how damaged her body still is and as his hand reaches her breast and caresses it playing with her nipple between his thumb and finger it causes a pain and pleasure to shoot through her and overload her senses. They smile. Taking their time, they eventually cum. " _aahhhhh!_ " she lets out a sigh of relief as she gently rolls over.

She smiles as he lays contented beside her. _"Awww! Awww!"_  
Suddenly the pain is intense and rips through her body "Oh GOD!"  
Her faces screws up and then she lays still trying to breathe through it. "SHIT!. This is not good!" she takes long slow, deep breaths trying to deal with it

"oh you, son of a bitch" she closes her eyes willing the pain to stop. She concentrates on each wave of pain trying to breathe through it.

"CJ are you okay?" he's concerned. Her face has gone pale "You don't look good"

"No, no I'm not" She grits her teeth "Oh shit!" She puts her hand on her dressing.

He looks "Oh Hell!" There's a small pool of blood coming through it and Clay panics "I'll get Trent" He grabs his phone

Trent's there in ten minutes. He frowns as he looks at her "What the hell happened?"

She looks at Clay and back at Trent "I turned over too quick" she lies.

Trent looks at Clay and shakes his head, something tells him from their state of undress that that's not true.

He sorts her out and gives her a painkiller injection then he goes to leave pushing past Clay in the doorway. "I won't tell Jason, this time. But don't put me in that position again" He warns him. Then he looks Clay straight in the eye "And it's too soon for that sort of thing"

Clay doesn't speak but sighs. "Why does Jason have to be so involved?"

"Because he is! And he told you, this had to stop. Clay, why don't you do yourself a favor and listen for once"

"I can take care of her. We're adults not children"

"Yeah and it looks like you're doing a great job!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She's drifting in and out of sleep on the couch watching TV. Clay's is in the shower when there's a knock on the door.

"That's strange. She thinks. Everyone else normally lets themselves in.

She looks at the bathroom. Clay still has water running and she manages to get herself upright "Hold up, I'm coming" she calls out as she opens the door slowly, holding the pain in her side.

There's a woman standing there which takes her by surprise. "Oh! Can I help"

"Is Clay here?" she tries to look inside the apartment. She looks C.J up and down wondering who is this woman in sweats, a crop top and large dressing on her side. "What happened to you?"

"Oh, something and nothing" she smiles

"Oh, you can't tell me right." she nods and smiles "I get it. Something to do with Clay's job?" C.J doesn't answer her "Is he here or not?"

"Yeah! Yeah, he's in the shower. Can I help?" It suddenly dawns on C.J "Are you Stella?" She looks puzzled

"Yeah. How did you know? Did he tell you about me?"

She nods "Um... you better come in and wait". She shakes her head wondering what this is all about.

As she goes to close the door a hand stops her. "Jason! ...Oh hey!"

"What the hell are you doing up answering the door? Where's Clay?"

"He's um...he's in the shower. He's got a visitor" she points at Stella

Jason nods ignoring Stella. Clay is coming out of the shower wrapped only in a towel. He looks surprised to see Stella and Jason standing there. "Hey what's going on?"

 **"WHY** is she up answering the door?" Jason blasts at him "Trent told YOU. I told you. She must not do _anything,_ anything. Was that not clear?"

"Jason cool it" C.J intervenes "Its fine. It was my fault, he told me to stay put but I didn't listen"

Stella wonders if she made a mistake coming here she looks at Clay. "Can we talk ?" she interrupts. She's confused as to what's going on here. It looks complicated

C.J can see this is going to be awkward. She looks at Clay then back at Stella.  
She can tell that Stella wants to talk to him "Okay, I tell you what, Jason you can take me for some fresh air. I could do with getting out of here for a while" She looks back at Jason for the okay "That will give these two some space to talk. Yes?"

Jason quickly weighs it up. "Okay, yeah if that's what you want" he smiles. He has to admit he likes that idea of getting C.J to himself

"Are you sure? You don't have to" Clay's not sure why Stella is here and he's not sure he wants CJ to leave with Jason "We can talk in the kitchen"

Stella goes to raise an objection she really wanted a private conversation but CJ gets in first "No, it's fine. Probably for the best. You need some space, plus and I could do with a change of scene" she smiles at Stella "Stella, it was nice to meet you "

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Sooo, that was awkward" Stella laughs "Is she your new girlfriend?" she inquires

"Who C.J? Um...No. No, she's just staying for some recovery" he lies, well he's not sure if it's a lie but he's never called her his girlfriend as this had never been anything serious.

"She in the Navy?" Stella tests the water, but Clay doesn't answer "Okay, so you can't answer that. So, I'll take that as a yes. Something to do with what you do?" she nods

"Something like that" Clay smiles.

"But you can't say. Nothing changes then." she nods "Well girlfriend or not, she's very pretty. Well apart from all that bruising. It looks serious" she knows she will get no answers to her questions "So, why's she staying at yours?"

"No one else had room"

"Well neither do you" she laughs "So, what you sleep on the couch?"

"Pretty much" There's is an awkward silence "So what did you want Stella?"

"Just to talk. Can we do that?"

"Sure. Let me get some clothes. You want a beer?"

He grabs his sweats, a tee shirt and two beers from the fridge. And they sit on the couch to talk

"I know it's been a while, but I've been thinking about things, and I think I owe you an explanation"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason and C.J are in the truck "So, what you want to do?" he smiles "Roller coaster, fairground, bungee jumping you name it? I'm up for anything " he laughs

She smiles "You know I'm quite tired. Can we just go sit somewhere? I just thought they deserved some space. I think they need to talk"

"We could go to mine. Drink these beers, watch TV and chill out"

"Okay. What about Linda?"

"Oh, she's not there. She's gone home for a couple of nights. Mikey's at friends and Emma, Emma will be in her room"

"Okay. Then that sounds great." She's so tired that anything would be good

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They're sat on the couch, watching the TV, neither of them saying very much.

Jason's drinking the beers and she sighs " I'd kill for one of those" she smiles

"You want?" he frowns watching her as she nods thinking he's being serious. He smiles "You really want? " He teases her he putting it under nose and then taking it away.

"Aww! C'mon, give me a sip. It won't hurt and I won't even tell Trent" she laughs

He drinks some more, shaking his head, holding it high above her so she can't reach. She leans over him to grab it. "C'mon Jason, please" she smiles and makes one more grab "Awww!" she grimaces as she pulls at her stitches

"No!" he looks at her, checking she's okay. She curls her lip and gives him that look she does. He smiles and caves in "Okay just _one_ sip" he indicates with his finger

She smiles as she takes a, big, swig "WOW! God, that tasted good"

"Enough" he takes it away and puts it down on the table. She sighs again as she rests her head on his shoulder and it's not long before she's fallen asleep.

He looks at his watch. It's getting late. He picks her up carefully, the way he use to the children when they were sleeping and lays her in his bed _You'll sleep better there!_

He slips her sweatpants off to make her more comfortable. Then sits on the end of the bed watching her sleeping. He frowns at he looks at all the bruising all over her body. He dismisses the feelings he's having then looks at his watch again.

He picks up his phone and calls Clay "Hey! Look, she's fallen asleep here so I'm gonna leave her sleeping rather than wake her up. But I'll run over and grab her meds, just in case she wakes up in the night"

"Are you sure? I can come get her." Clay's disappointed

"No! I'm sure. She's fine. There's no point disturbing her. I'll come now. Emma's here so it's not a problem"

He grabs his jacket and keys " EMMA!" He shouts "I have to go to Clay's, to get something. DON'T LEAVE THE HOUSE. Do you hear me? And call me if there's a problem"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay goes to the kitchen to gather up the drugs and Trent's notes into a bag.

"What's wrong?"

Stella is still there, they've been talking, drinking beer, watching TV and laughing about things as Clay checks his watch.  
"I didn't realize it was so late. Um.. that was Jason. C.J's fallen asleep so he's coming to get her pain meds. He's gonna leave her at his"

Stella nods. She continues to drink her beer as she smiles to herself "So she's not coming back here tonight?"

"Doesn't look like it"

"You not happy about that?"

"No, its fine. Like I said, I just didn't realize it was so late."

"Another beer maybe?" She tempts

"Sure"

He feels a little bit awkward now. He sits down and they carry on drinking. Stella stands her bottle down and leans across him taking his bottle from his hand

"What are you doing?"

"Clay I think you know." She holds his cheek "I want you back. That's what I really came to tell you. That I can do what you want. Live the life you want. I've been thinking what I can't do is live without you" she leans across him again and starts kissing him. He tries not to respond

"What? You don't want me?" she leans back and looks at him. "Are you seeing her is that why?"

He shakes his head. She's confusing his emotions. It might be the beer. It might be the moment. It might be the stress of the past few weeks but as she leans in and kisses him again, he responds, and kisses her back. Then putting his hand behind her head, he pulls her towards him.

The door opens and Jason walks in. "You know I should have made Trent come get the meds, after all….. " he trails off "What the HELL is going on here?"

"SHIT!" Clay jumps up "Nothing! Nothing, it was... just nothing! A moment. A mistake she came on to me"

"You were supposed to be taking care of CJ, not doing THIS with her!" he points to the couch and Stella

"Jason, please it's not what it looks like"

Stella is scared "It was me. I came on to him" she wonders if she takes the blame if Jason will calm down because right now he looks furious, and she's afraid there's going to be a fight. A fight she won't be able to stop and there's no one from Bravo here to stop them.

"Get me her meds!" Jason shakes his head, he's disappointed in Clay "She's staying at mine now. You can't be trusted"

"Wait what? Jason...Oh god... please..." Clay is panicked "please don't say anything to her until I've had a chance to explain. I don't want her to get the wrong idea"

"Say anything? No! No, I'm not saying anything, and neither are you. Do you hear me. She's got enough to deal with without out you messing her around. Just get her stuff"

"What's going on?" Stella can't get her head round the situation "What are you sleeping with her?"

"Oh, jeez are you stupid. What did you think he was doing? What the hell did you think was going on here?" Jason never did like Stella, she couldn't take orders, or do as she was told, and she messed with Clay's head at the wrong times.

"But I asked you and you said No! You said it was just a work thing. Did you lie to me?" she runs her hand through her hair "I came here to try to get back together, I thought that's what you wanted?"

Clay rubs his hand through his hair. "Shit! This is crazy." his mind's racing. He can't get his head round all this.

Jason laughs as he grabs the bag from Clay's hand "I told you this was over, it is now!" He slams the door as he leaves.

Though he's angry that Clay disobeyed him about being with CJ. He smiles as he walks down the hallway. He's now got what he wanted


	7. Chapter 7

Sonny will fix the problem

"Hey Grandma"

"Emma is your dad there?"

"No! No, he went out. He should be back soon, He said he had to go to Clay's to get something"

"Okay darling could you tell him to call me? I've tried a couple of times earlier but he's not answering"

"Sure, will do. When are you coming back?"

"I'll be back in the morning, in time for Mikey's party. I think your dad was inviting a few people over to celebrate. If you know any of Mikey's friends try to get them to come. He should have some friends there, as your dad will probably have forgotten to invite them"

"Sure, thing Grandma" Emma continues to chat with grandmother as she heads to the kitchen to get some juice "Is someone getting a cake?"

"Naima said she was going to make a cake. I think she has one of your mom's recipes"

Emma gets her juice and heads back to her room. As she passes her Dad's room she notices the door is ajar. Curiously she pushes it open. And there, asleep on the bed is a woman she's doesn't recognise. She's dressed only in her underwear and Emma notices the dressing on her side "Gran..." she frowns as she stands there looking at this woman

"Yes dear" Emma remains silent "Emma? Emma are you okay?" Linda's worried by the tone of Emma's voice.

"Gran, there's a woman, asleep, on Dad's bed, who is she?"

"A _woman_? What there now? What woman."

"I don't know. She's got dark hair and looks like she's been hurt. Is this who he was talking about? The one he wanted to stay with us."

"Emma, where did you say your father is?"

"I told you he went to Clay's to get something"

"He did, did he. Emma you get him to call me the minute he gets back. Tell him I _want_ to speak to him."

"Sure thing" Emma slowly closes the door. And heads back to her room "I'll see you tomorrow. I love you"

"I love you dear. Just remember get your father to call me!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason returns with C.J's medication as Emma comes out of her room "Hey!" he frowns "You okay? Any problems while I was gone?"

"No none, but who's that woman?"

"Woman? What woman?"

"Dad!" she frowns "The _woman,_ in her underwear, in _your_ room. Is it that the woman that Gran said can't stay?"

"Look, Emma, it's not what you think. She fell asleep and I didn't wanna disturb her. She just needs the rest. I just went to get her meds. It's just for one night" He looks at her frowning at him "Hey, it's nothing to worry about, okay?" he kisses the top of her head

Emma nods at him suspiciously "Grandma called. She wants to speak to you."

"You know what she wanted?"

"She called about Mikey's birthday tomorrow"

"SHIT!"

"Dad you didn't forget did you? About his birthday. Grandma's coming back, she has arranged for Naima to make a cake and bring over You do remember?"

"Yeah, sure of course." He lies "Look, it's all fine, just go back to bed" He kisses her head again.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

He stands in the doorway watching C.J sleep. She stirs on the bed. He spots her phone lying there and he picks it up. There are several texts from Clay saying call me.

"Not tonight!" He slips it in his pocket, then lays down on the bed next to her. Tired, he lets out a long-exhausted sigh and closes his eyes.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Daylight fills the bedroom. C.J squints as she opens her eyes.  
" _Awww!"_ she grimaces at the pain. She's slightly disorientated for a moment as she comes around. "Where the hell am I? Oh my god! ... _Awww!_ " she groans at the pain in her side "Awww! Got, that's sore"

She tries to sit up on the bed but as she puts her legs over the edge of the mattress she finds the pain is making her feel lightheaded and sick. She turns to look around the room "What the ... JASON?!" she frowns, unsure how this has happened "What the hell's going on?"

He opens his eyes. "Hey! Are you okay?" He smiles at her "You fell asleep. I didn't want to disturb you, so I left you here"

"Okay" She nods. She's still slightly confused "Did you let Clay know?"

"Yeah! He was fine about it. I went and got you some painkillers"

"Oh great" she lets out a sigh as she holds the pain in her side "I could do with some. I'm really sore this morning" she looks around "You seen my phone? I think I man have dropped it" She gives another deep groan from the pain

"No, but I'll have a look for it. Shall I get Trent to come and have a look at that?"

"Yeah might be best. It's not hurt like this for a while"

He frowns with concern; she never wants any medical interference so this must mean it's bad "I'll phone him now. You want a coffee?"

"Yeah be good and some of those painkillers if you can"

"Yeah sure" he kisses her forehead

He brings the coffee and painkillers back to the bedroom  
"Trent said you can take three of these this morning, if you feel you need them, and he'll come by later, have a look. He said he can give you extra pain relief if you need it"

"Okay, that's great"

"I've got a few people coming over later this morning. Mikey's birthday, you wanna stay?"

"Oh, I um...I should head back" She smiles "You know I'm not sure it's my thing, being confronted with BRAVO team wives, at a birthday party"

"Hey, if you wanna stay, then stay. It'll be fine. I'll make sure no one says anything"

"Yeah I know you would but doesn't mean it wouldn't still be awkward for everyone." she shakes her head "Them having to be nice, just because you told them to. No, that's not much fun. I think I'll head back, so you can all enjoy it" she smiles and swallows the painkillers. She lays back on the bed to relax.

Jason lays on the bed beside her. She opens her eyes again and turns her head to look at him. Studying his face, she runs hand over the lines on it. "You okay? You look tired It's there in your face" She's never seen him tired like this before.

He doesn't know why but he can't resist her and leans in for a kiss.

She puts her hand up to hold him back "Jason, don't!" she shakes her head. Though she says the words, she's not sure she means it as she liked the comfort his kiss gave. The brief relief from the pain in her side. So, although she says _No_ Really she wants him to do it again. And when he puts his hand behind her head pulling her in, kissing her more, well this time she doesn't stop him. " _Hmmmm!_ " she frowns "Jason... as nice as this is, we can't!"

He looks her deep in the eyes and she just keeps staring back. She wants him so much, and eventually she does give in. Leaning forward she puts her lips on his and allows him to kiss her again.

"I suppose I _could_ stay, in here" she smiles as she looks him in the eyes _Oh! Why can't I just stay away from him? It would make life so much easier_

He smiles "Yeah you could."

He stops as he hears Emma moving around in the kitchen. He sits up, as he doesn't really want her seeing them like this and CJ's phone, in his pocket, keeps vibrating with missed calls.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Naima arrives as Jason's with Ray and the kids. She's brought the cake she made with 'Happy Birthday Mikey which she places on the table. Mikey is still at his sleepover, but he's heading back soon. Sonny arrives with Davis. He picked her up. Least that's what they told everyone. Truth was they left Sonny's together.

C.J comes from the bedroom; she needs the bathroom.

"What the hell is she doing here?" Sonny looks at Ray

"I have no idea." he looks round at Naima who has this massive scowl on her face. Jason's in the kitchen as they bring the cake through "Hey man what's up?" Ray nods "Why's C.J here?"

"Oh um... she fell asleep last night. I didn't want to move her, so she slept here"

Trent arrives. He and C.J go to the bedroom so he can have a look at her wound and sort some more pain relief.

Ray looks around "Clay not here? Jace, he does know she's here, right?" Ray's suspicious of Jason motives "Jason, what's going on here brother?"

"You wanna know? I caught Clay on the couch with Stella last night"

"Jason man, what have you done?" he wonders if something has happened "Jason are you listening. Did you do something?"

"No nothing. I just think she has enough on her plate, and she needed the rest!"

Jason walks off as others begin to arrive for the party and he greets them. "Jason don't ignore me, man!" but he does, and Ray follows him through to the living room

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Linda's now arrived back, and she enters the bedroom to find Jason in there with Trent and C.J.

" _WHAT_ the _HELL_ is going on here? Jason, I told you that I didn't want her in this house!"

"Mom, it's my house" he glares at her "Look... " he tries to quieten her down. " she needed to stay. here wasn't any choice!"

Linda purses her lips. "You make me so angry. You went against everything I said. There was every choice" she stares at him hard "Jason you get her out of here, it's Mikey's Birthday for god sake. Son, what is wrong with you?" she shakes her head "You aren't thinking straight. Jason, why do you let her do this to you? It's like you lose your head when she's around"

"I am here you know" C.J looks at them, then up at Trent. He's changing the dressing on her wound and carries on trying to ignore the argument going on behind him. "You want me to give you this injection for the pain?"

She nods "Yeah that would be good" she feels embarrassed about what Linda is saying. She knows what they all think of her.

"Mom shut up you are making a scene. Look ...it's fine. Just go enjoy the party! Like you said it's Mikey's birthday and he'll be back soon"

"I'm not happy about this Jason" she gives him this furious look as she leaves

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Linda goes to the kitchen she's still fuming. "I don't know what hold that woman has over him, but she makes me so mad."  
She rants to Naima .

Sonny frowns "You know what, I'm calling Clay to come get her. She don't need to be here today"

Ray puts his hand to the phone "Sonny just wait. Look, Jason he told me, he found Clay with Stella last night"

"What? How the hell that happen? I thought they were done, what the hell is golden boy up to?"

Ray shrugs "I don't know. That's all Jason said."

"I sure as hell need to find out what's going on here" He picks up his phone and calls Clay

Sonny opens a beer and takes a long drink. It might be early, but his temper is rising "I'm to fixing this problem once and for all"

"Hey Sonny, steady there brother. Just be careful what you say to her. You need to calm down. You know what she's like. I don't want this getting out of hand" Ray's concerned

"No, you know what Ray, I'm fixing this. She needs to go! If not she's gonna split this team up with her little games" He points at Ray "Look, I warned you all in the past that she poisons everything" Sonny drinks the beer down and gets another, he's pacing with anger as he points to his head and circles his finger "She gets in Jason's his head, then she twists his mind. Well she's not getting in Clay's. I thought this was done, Ray. When we went through all this shit last time" he shakes his head "We should have sent her packing from the start"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

C.J comes to the kitchen to get some water. It doesn't matter that Trent gave her that injection the pain is still really bad, and she takes a couple more painkillers. She doesn't care as long as it gives her some relief.

"I don't want you in this house do you hear me?" she didn't see her but Linda's at the refrigerator " _This_ is Alana's children's house and you are not welcome. Do you understand me? I want you to go!" She clenches her teeth

C.J tries to ignore her and carries on at the sink "Sure Linda, I hear you. I will go back to Clay's soon. but, just for the record it is actually Jason's house now, not yours, and he asked me to stay" She smiles as the two-woman glare at each other "You know Linda, he's not a child who you can push around anymore"

It's always in CJs nature to fight back when confronted. She won't just be told. Linda is fuming with her. "You really are still a little bitch aren't you?"

CJ Smiles at her "If you say so."

Sonny's in the doorway and he puts a gently hand on Linda's shoulder "It's okay Linda, you go Enjoy the party. I'll deal with her."

Linda sighs and nods. "I just want her gone, Sonny."

Sonny nods "Yeah we all do."

"You'll deal with her?" CJ laughs "Listen to you Sonny, you're a joke. So how will you deal with _her_ exactly, cos I'd love to know" she knocks back the pills with the water. She puts her hand to her waist; her wound is still aching again. _"Awww!_ " she screws up her face in pain

"You really are a poisonous little bitch aren't you" he snaps back taking a swig from his beer

She shrugs & smiles "Not sure Jason agrees but, we could ask."

"Don't get smart, CJ. You wanna play hard ball do ya? Okay then, let's see how that works out for you" He's contemplating how to deal with her. Watching her, while sipping his beer "You know how come you was here last night? Why he didn't' take you back to Clay's"

"Cos I fell asleep?" she shrugs "I don't know. Maybe.. " she smirks cockily "maybe, Jason wanted to be with me. How do I know? Point is I am here"

"You know if you wasn't a woman, so help me god, I'd have punched you out by now" He calms himself with a swig of beer

"You could try it." she shrugs

"Don't tempt me C.J" He coughs "You're here, cos he found Clay cozying up with Stella last night. Oh, and you're probably right, cos he saw a chance to fuck you again. That's his problem he don't think with his damn head where you're concerned"

She gulps "What do you mean, Clay was with Stella? You're making that up."

Just as she looks up Clay appears at the doorway "C.J I'm sorry, it wasn't meant to happen" he pauses "She came on to me. She thought I wanted to give it another go. She kissed me, there's nothing in it."

"Nothing in it? What the hell!" laughs "So you never kissed her back then?"

"Look, last night it was.. it was a mistake. It was just a moment" He pleads "Oh c'mon CJ, you never made a mistake in a moment before?"

She looks away from him. Of course, she had. Her life was one list of momentary mistakes. But somehow this happening to _her_ , well it hurt. She was always the one in control.  
"It was _just_ a moment?" she laughs and shakes her head "And I'm supposed to just accept that?" Stella appears behind Clay "Oh my god you brought her here!" she's lost for words "So she did stay the night?" She holds her side. She's in physical and emotional pain right now.

"I'm sorry! I know look, she .. Stella will you explain that it was just a mistake"

"You know what I don't care. It's done. There is no me and you, there never was" she grimaces again in pain "Go back to Stella! If you think she'll make you happy. I don't think she will, but there you go"

"CJ, please just let me explain"

"Just leave me alone Clay"

Sonny's smirking as he watches them argue. Drinking his beer like some sort of spectator "Yeah Blondie it's time to go. And don't you go breaking your heart over her. To her it's just sex. Ain't that right?" He looks at C.J "See she..." holding his beer bottle he points in her direction "... she drops her panties when she wants her own way, or when she wants something she can't have. She's got good at it over the years, first Jason, now you."

"Oh, go to hell Sonny!" she screams with anger.

"Clay, just get out of here. Go!"

"I just wanna explain"

"Forget about it, it's done Now go!" Clay falters as Sonny frowns at him "I said ... _Get out!_ " He doesn't know what's going on, but Clay decides it's not time to argue with Sonny

CJ keeps glaring at him. She has a lump building in her throat. She's in pain from her injury and emotionally wounded. She really wants to cry but holds her composure. There is no way that she'll let Sonny think he made her cry. Now her angers has built, and Sonny can see it.

"Truth hurts doesn't it" he smiles staring at her "You know your trouble C.J? Your problem is you're too used to people giving you your own way and getting what you want too often"

She regains her composure and starts to snap back "Oh according to the gospel of Sonny Quinn, right!" she mocks "A man who has every stripper for a mile on speed dial, and when he's not on duty, he lives like a fish at the bottom of a whiskey bottle, in his empty apartment. Why the hell would I take a life lecture from you?"

He nods "Yeah I'll admit..." he laughs " that we're actually a lot alike. Me and you, we both party way too hard, and drink, way too much. Hell... " he laughs "..you drink more than some guys I've partied with! Oh, and we both do stupid shit because of our drinking" He takes a swig of his beer "and you know what else, we both wreck every damn relationship we touch"

She looks away, she's trying not to listen to him "Go to hell Sonny! Me and you, we're nothing alike!"

He laughs "Oh Sure! You're one tough cookie, I'll give you that"  
He nods, "Despite the odds, you got to be one of the best, and pretty damn good out there. So, I'll take my hat off to that. But you know what? You became hard, in and out. You're so messed up that you're like one of them little pit bull dogs. You spend so long learning to fight all you is how to destroy stuff" He drinks more beer as they stare at each other "Oh I know why you do it..."

"Really you do?" she shakes her head and laughs

"Yeah cos deep down you have pain, we've all been there! The stuff you've seen, the stuff you've done. It makes you put up barriers, then you become lonely, because only a few of us understand what it's like" He watches her reaction "but I'm putting a stop to you messing with this team! They're my brothers. You hurt Jason once and I stood by and I won't do that again"

"Oh, I've had enough of listening to this shit!" she sneers at him "I won't stand here and be lectured by you." she takes a breath "So what? What you gonna do then Sonny?"

He looks at her pausing and thinking "I'm gonna tell Jason it was Ray!"

She stops and goes quiet. She stares at his eyes trying to get read on him. "You're what?" she swallows hard. It's taken her by surprise "Tell him Ray what?"

"Oh, come on CJ don't try to play me, you know what!"

"How do you know about that? Did Ray tell you?" She calls his bluff "There's no way you'll tell Jason that. What and wreck Rays life in the process? Okay, fine! Go ahead." she shrugs "See what I care!"

"Oh, you care. Cos you don't want Jason to hate you. He didn't forgive you then when it thought it was a no one. I'm not sure how he'll react when he finds out it was his best friend and teammate"  
He watches her reaction, as she stands there staring at him "Oh and don't stand there wondering if I'm bluffing, cos I'm not" Sonny doesn't flinch

She's trying to work him out and understand what he's up to. "What are you after Sonny?" she can't get a read on him "You'll destroy Ray's marriage, to stop me seeing Jason?" she frowns "How does that even work?"

"No see I don't think It will, destroy his marriage. Sure, you'd like it to, but see I know Naima loves him, and he sure as damn loves the bones of her." He takes another swig of beer "He made _the_ stupidest fuck up in the history of fuck ups when he had sex with you and I'll bet there not a single day he doesn't wish he could take it back, or at least come clean, but he can't, so he lives with it. You were both to blame that night. I know that but see that's not what I'll tell Jason"

He stops looking at her "See the way I _remember_ it, Ray was so god damn drunk and you kept coming on to him, even though he refused, but you didn't let it go, so you laid it on a plate to him until he was so drunk he couldn't refuse" He drinks again

She smirks "But that wasn't it. It wasn't how it happened."

"Sure, truth be told it wasn't, but..." he shrugs "you roll the dice you takes the chance. Will he believe me, or will he believe you?"

She despises him now. "Hope you can live with the consequences then?"

"Oh sure. Hell I'll admit it'll cause some problems I don't doubt and he'll have to sleep on the couch for a while, be home when he told and do all them odd jobs round the house, but eventually she'll forgive him cos it's _you_ and she knows what you do!"

He takes another large swig of his beer "Any how Ray and Naima that's not your issue. Your issue is what will Jason do?" He smiles "Wonder if he'll be so forgiving? That's the question you need to think about!" he drains his beer and takes another from the ice bucket.

CJs head is spinning. She runs her hands through her hair and tries to think. Sonny has her backed into the corner but she's too tired to fight him back. "So what?" she shrugs her shoulders at him "What do you want me to do? I can't help it Jason and me still have feelings that won't go away"

"Maybe, maybe not? What I want is for you to pack up your shit and go back to Washington. Stay there and don't come back! If you're gone, Jason will get over it like he did before. Oh hell, come on CJ you gonna be grounded now anyway with that injury!"

There's a silence that comes while they both think. "Oh, and you stay away from Blondie, no more screwing with his stupid head. He can't help following his dick, but he'll get over it"

"He'll just come after me Jason, I mean. He won't let me just leave like that, not now!"

"Well you'll just have to make him!" Sonny gives her a glare " You tell him whatever you need to tell him to make sure he doesn't come looking"

She's cornered now. "Fuck you! Go on then tell, I don't care! I have nothing to lose whatever now, so go ahead destroy your team"

"Destroy my team? You're gonna destroy it anyway if I let you carry on. So, what the hell have I got to lose either. Look, even now you don't give a rats ass who you hurt" he sneers at her. He never thought he could dislike a person so much "Oh and don't be getting no ideas about spilling the beans after you've gone. That's type of little bitch trick you'd do Because trust me _I_ will find you and what them Nigerian nut jobs did to you, that will be nothing to what I'll do you comprehende?"

"Fine! Have it your way, see what I care! Just remember it's you stopping Jason being happy"

"You think he'll be happy with you? Never. I'm doing him a favor"

Her side is really hurting now, and she takes another couple of painkillers. She really can't stand here any longer arguing with Sonny. She knows if he does tell Jason, that Jason will NEVER forgive her. "Fine! Have it your way. I don't care anymore"

She pushes past to go to the bedroom.

Sonny lets out a huge sigh of relief "Whoa shit!" he takes his hat off and rubs his head as he takes a huge deep breath and drinks some more beer. "WOW! I've played some poker hands in my life but hot damn that made me sweat"

"So, would you really have done it?" Davis comes from where she's been standing. "I heard every word of that!"

"Shit Davis! I didn't know you was there." he looks around "Listen, you can't repeat any of that! Not _ever_! You understand? Not a word?"

"Would you?" She asks again

Sonny Shrugs "Truthfully? I don't know, but I'm sure as hell glad we didn't have to find out"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

C.J gathers her stuff together in the bedroom. She's angry, hurt, embarrassed a million things but most of all physically hurting the pain in her side. _I need to get out of here and lie down_ She's desperately trying to think how to call Sonny's bluff. _Would he seriously do what he said?_

"What's going on?" Jason enters and sees her gathering stuff. "Hey, I said what are you doing? " he pushes her hair back from her face and see's the bag "I found your phone"

She sees all the missed calls and rolls her eyes "Thanks."

She takes a deep breath in as she gathers herself to tell him "Jason, I'm leaving!" She pauses watching his face. "For good. I'm not welcome here and that's not going to change"

Reluctantly she sighs. All she wants to do is reach out to him and have him hold her, but she can't. Her voice stiffens "I'm going back to Washington to stay at my parents, at least till I recover fully" she takes another deep breath as she struggles to hold her emotional voice "Jason, I need to get my head straight. Oh, don't look at me like that"

She shakes her head and looks away gathering herself again "Hell, I'm gonna be grounded now anyway, so most of my work will probably be in D.C anyway" she watches him looking for his approval.

He doesn't give it as it reaches to hold her cheek "You can do that here, Recover, here with me"

She shakes her head "I can't"

"CJ please! Look, I'll make my mother leave if that's the problem. You can stay here with me" he pleads with her "Don't go, C.J, we can make this right "

She holds his face and shakes her head "No we can't" She grimaces in pain from her side "Just don't!"

"Just don't go. I need you"

Her voice is cracking now and the lump in her throat is hurting She shakes her head again "I have to it's for the best! This, this.. can't go on. I don't want to be the one that makes you choose between me and your team. I could never do that, no matter how much... how much I want you and I _do_ want you." She swallows hard, tears pricking her eyes " I'm sorry it has to be this way. I've got no choice"  
She desperately fights back tears "You know it's for the best."

"Best for who? Don't go. Just stay and we'll make it right" he puts both hands either side of her head and kisses her.

It feels so good. She puts her hands-on top of his and holds for a moment. She just wants to desperately say she'll stay but she catches Sonny's eye as he standing in the corridor drinking his beer, watching them, and she pulls his hands away and steps back as a tear rolls down her cheek. She quickly wipes it away

"I'm sorry. I have to... I'm not in a good place at the moment" she frowns watching his face "Jason your kids need you right now, be there for them"

She gives him one last long lingering kiss. Staring him full in the eyes, watching him, then picks up her bag and leaves. Her heart feels like its breaking as she heads out of the bedroom door. She's trying to hold back her tears but they're escaping down her face.

Seeing Sonny smile at her in the hallway nearly breaks her "See you in hell Sonny!"

"Look forward to it" he smiles feeling a relief that she's gone.

Jason puts his head back on the wall and closes his eyes for a few minutes trying to keep control of his emotions but then something snaps, and he loses it and smashes all the bottles the side table.

Sonny closes his eyes and takes a swig of beer. As much as he doesn't like to see Jason hurt _He'll get over it._

He turns and walks away to re-join the others

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Commander Blackburn's in his office, finishing up some paperwork but he's just about ready to head off when there's a knock at the door

"Come" he replies

Mandy enters the room "Commander, can I have a word?"

"Oh, hi Mandy. Yeah, I was actually just about to head off. Did you fancy a late drink?"

She doesn't speak, just throws a beige file marked CLASSIFIED on the desk. Blackburn looks down at it on the desk and back at Mandy "This is work rather than social call."

She nods "And this..." she points at the file " is strictly between us" She stares at him with no emotion in her face. "It's a restricted file, but I thought you should see it"  
She stands stony faced as he flicks the cover of the file open. She's taking a big risk showing him it, but she thinks he needs to know.

Eric starts to read. There's not that much in the file

Fatal Accident - Today 14:00hr - military prisoner vehicle .  
STATUS: Military police – Number: 2 accounted - confirmed dead at the scene

STATUS :Prisoner - unaccounted

STRICTLY CLASSIFIED INFORMATION.  
There are photographs of the two bodies, the vehicle and a few other documents

He looks up at Mandy "What's this got to do with me?" he frowns then begins to look through the file there is a prisoner detail form "Reagan!.Shit. Have they got any idea where he is?"

"No." she stares at him "Officially…" she gives a wry smile and sighs "...this is a tragic car accident and all three were killed at the scene and are accounted for. Three bodies at the scene" she bites her lips

Blackburn looks at her in shock then back at the report.

"Just thought you should know" She gathers the file back up and leaves.

Blackburn stands up. He paces for a moment, then turns to look out the window and lets out a huge sigh


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 9: A cure for heartbreak**

 ** 3 ** ** months later**

Clay's sitting at the bar. He's scrolling his phone, and slowly drinking his beer. He gives a long deep sigh and puts the empty bottle on the counter. It's something he finds himself doing a lot lately, drinking beer and sighing.

"Hey!" Sonny pulls up the stool next to him " Beer and tequila" he nods to the barman "and whatever the kid's havin'? "

Clay looks at him and smiles "Beer!" he waves the bottle that he has in his hand.

"How you doin'?"

"Okay"

"Well you don't look Okay. You look miserable. So, what's wrong?"

Clay hesitates before he answers "Stella! She ended it " he sighs "I guess it's over for good this time."

Sonny nods "Any particular reason? That she ended it I mean."

Clay sighs "I don't know. I guess it just wasn't the same. Not after everything that's gone on."

Sonny watches him for a moment or two "Oh Clay!" he shakes his head "Please, tell me you're not still hankering after that other little bitch?"

Clay shrugs "No. Well ... well maybe a bit" He pauses, pulling anxiously at the label on his beer bottle "If I'm honest Sonny, she's all I can think about. CJ I mean." he shakes his head "I wish I could stop, but I can't. Every time I close my eyes I can see her. It's like when I was having ..." he looks around hushing his voice "...having sex, with Stella, all I thought about was that I wished it was CJ and how good it was with her. You understand me?"

Sonny drinks his beer, grinding his teeth at the sound of her name.  
 _I thought I fixed that damn problem for good!_ Seems getting her out of their lives physically, was a hell of a lot easier than getting her out of their heads. "Jesus! Clay, this has gotta stop. She's like a goddamn ghost hanging over us"  
He shakes his head and drinks some beer "Look man, you gotta forget her cos she aint coming back. She aint no good for any of ya."

Clay nods "I know, I really do, and I've tried. But I can't help thinking, if only, if only thing could have been different. "

Sonny pushes one of the tequila shots towards him "Drink!"

Clay smiles. He doesn't really want it, but he drinks it anyway

"Okay, so tell me then. What are you missing about that damn tramp?" Sonny's losing his patience. "She played you, and Jason. She don't give a rat's ass about either of you, she never has" He turns on his stool to look at Clay in the eyes "Look Clay, the thing about CJ, she only cares about herself. As long as she gets what she wants, she's happy. So, fuck her I say"  
He takes a big long sniff in "Cos I for one am glad she's gone"

Clay nods. He licks and bites his lips apprehensively as he sits thinking. He knows Sonny's right. He might be right, but in Clay's head, it's different "Yeah but Sonny .." he sighs "oh, you wouldn't understand"

"Then try me."

"It was just so good. Everything about her, you know ,like the sex..." he hushes his tone "...the sex was like...oh my god, she was fantastic in bed"

"Listen up now Blondie." Sonny looks up from his beer to look Clay in the eyes "Sex is just sex. Good sex, bad sex it's all the same. The real rush, that's what you get when we do what we do. When we're out there on operation, in the dark and the wet, under fire in a goddam desert hell hole. That's where we get your rocks off"

"I know but.. but she just...just something special."

"No, no buts!" Sonny points to the barman, then to the empty Tequila glass indicating for him to fill it up. Sonny orders more shots "Then keep 'em coming! We got heartbreak to cure" he laughs

Clay sits silent, deep in thought then he just blurts it out "Did you know she was pregnant?"

Sonny nearly chokes. His face drops with shock and he stops what he's doing. He turns to look at Clay open mouthed "What the hell, pregnant? What with your baby?" the look on his face, he's stunned "Does Jason know this? Shit Clay this is huge!"

"Oh no! No, I don't mean she's pregnant now" he remorsefully shakes his head. "No, she lost it, miscarriage. It was only early weeks and with all the injuries she had it was too much"  
He shrugs and sighs "You know, she said that she didn't know, that she was pregnant. But I just don't buy it man. How could she not?" He drinks one of the shots back "But I didn't help, I just left her to deal with it, on top of everything else. We never talked about it again" Clay shakes his head

"Hey, these things have a habit of happening for a reason. It was probably for the best if you ask me"

"Oh my god Sonny. How can losing a baby be a good thing? I can't believe you'd say that"  
Clay frowns "Well I can't stop thinking about it. I should have been there for her" he shakes his head "I should have dealt with it better, but I was just angry with her. But the thing is Sonny, she's smart so how could she be so stupid? Getting herself pregnant and then to risk it by going on operations like she did. I mean, jeez what sane person does that?"

"Well, perhaps she wasn't lying when she said she didn't know, it happens " Sonny shrugs "But then nothing surprises me with her anymore!...Jeez Clay, I've know her a lot longer than you and despite her looks and brains ... well she gets a drink inside ... that's a whole new level of stupid!"

He drinks his beer "Clay, thats the thing with CJ, she never thinks about consequences. Hell man, she lives for the danger. She loves living on the edge and when you do that..." he shakes his head and knocks back the tequila shot in his hand " ..well then bad things happen"

He looks at Clay who's still staring at his beer bottle. "Look man, no good would have come of it. Hell, it's not like could have even had a relationship with her. What, would you have given up your career for her? Cos I'll tell ya, she sure as hell wouldn't have given up hers for you."

Sonny looks him full in the face "Clay don't be hard on yourself, hell even Jason couldn't handle her, and he went into with his eyes wide open, or so he thought. She messed him right up that first time" He stops and drinks more beer then gets a refill on the tequila shots "You tell him I told you that and I'll kill ya!"

Sonny stares at his empty shot glass "Clay, her leaving . It was the best thing, the right thing for you, for Jason and for BRAVO" He pushes another Tequila towards him "Now drink!"

Clay sits quiet again "What did you say to her that morning, before she left?" he was always sure Sonny said something in the kitchen before she left " That morning at Jason's when you told me to go?"

Sonny takes a deep breath, thinking back to that day "Nothing really" he lies " I just pointed out that she needed to get herself well. That doing that here with the way things were, it wasn't an option" Sonny shakes his head trying to dismiss Clay's questions "It was her decision to go at the end of day and best damn decision she's ever made, if you ask me"

Sonny pushes more tequila in Clay's direction "Drink!"

Clay pushes it back this time "No! No, I don't want any more"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Jason's resting on the couch randomly flicking the news channels. They've just come back from a two-day operation and he's feeling it in his bones today. He aches and he's tired. His carrying a lot of worrying thoughts in his head and he just wishes he could switch off.

Half asleep on the couch he's not really listening to the TV just flicking the remote button. He keeps sighing. He hasn't been able to settle properly since C.J left, and she's been on his mind a lot lately. He'd even thought about going to Washington to see her. But for now, he just wants to switch off for a while.

He closes his eyes, thinking back to that morning in the shower room. Before they left on that spin up. That shouldn't have happened like that. He hurt her again that day, and now he regrets his actions. Treating her like that, she didn't deserve it and maybe things could have been different if he hadn't done that.

With the News channel running in the background he's drifts in and out of sleep until finally he closes his eyes.

He's dreaming.

He's back to that afternoon when they were here on the couch together, the News was running on the TV then too.

He's smiling, then he frowns.

Alana had taken the kids to her parents for a few days. He got back from a spin up and he doesn't know what came over him, but he brought C.J back to the house. Their house.

They'd spent most of their time creeping about with snatched moments in motel rooms and the back of his truck. So, it felt good to bring her back for time alone in a proper house.

Oh, he knew it was risk and he knew he shouldn't. It was wrong in so many ways but... still he did it. That's what she did to him, made him take risks he wouldn't normally take.

She made it clear she wouldn't sleep in their bed. So here they were on the couch making out. The couch, the floor and hell even the kitchen countertop. He smiles to himself; she was insatiable at times.

He never stopped think of what he was doing. When he was with her he just wanted her. Wanted to be with her. He was obsessed about her. She was like some sort of drug he couldn't give up.

And she was strong, so incredibly fit. He could feel his touch on her body now. It could be tender one moment then really intense. She was like real life danger. She was as close to the adrenaline rush he got out on operations, in a woman, that he would get.

That afternoon he remembers her laying on top of him on the couch. She was half asleep and he brushed back her hair. She looked in his eyes and just gave him that look. That fiery sexual look that she had and that's when he just came out with it

"I'm gonna leave Alana"

Thinking about it now, she was shocked. She'd never expected him to say that. He remembers she asked if he was sure and had he thought about it. About the consequences of doing it. But he was as sure as he ever had been. Despite all the arguments with Alana, he'd never come close to saying he was leaving, but this is what he wanted now.

He wanted to leave, and he wanted to leave for her.

He loved Alana but they were friends, a connection, a closeness of years. It wasn't THIS. This was intense. C.J got him. She understood the buzz of the danger, she thrived on it like him.

As much Alana tried to understand she would never get it as much as C.J did.

He could feel the touch of her skin now. Her firm grip when she wanted him. That look in eyes that she used to give him when she wanted something. When she wanted him. He could see it as clear now as he could then.

It turned him on then and still did.

Mmmm he groans in his sleep. Slipping his hand inside his shorts as he thinks about her. She turned him on so much. Just like now, even in his sleep she gave him a hard on.

Then he remembers his Mother, her shouting. She'd let herself into the house when she arrived early for a weekend visit.

 _WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE!..._

He wakes with a jolt. His hand in his shorts, wrapped around his hard dick and the beer he did have in his hand, when he fell asleep, is tipping its wet, cold contents over his neck "Oh shit!"

He sits himself up. Wiping his neck with the hem of his Tee shirt. He stands the bottle on the table beside the remotes.

The ticker tape runs across the bottom of the news channel

 ******* ****BREAKING NEWS:***** **** WIFE of US fleet command Admiral Roger Lewis** **has been found dead at their home in Washington**

The presenter reading out the details; It's believed Mrs Lewis disturbed intruders at the property. Details are still coming in and it isn't clear if anyone else was at the property at the time of the incident.  
The Admirals office is due to comment later today.

He picks up the bottle, headed to the kitchen to get a cloth. As he grabs the remote to turn the TV off a large profile picture of a naval officer comes on the screen. The picture grabs his attention and he sits bolt upright turning up the volume.

"SHIT! Oh my god!" he can't believe what he's hearing, and he picks up his cell and makes a call.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Blackburn is in sat in his office. He's meeting with Mandy Ellis and Lisa Davis regarding some spin up intel.  
His cell rings on the desk laying in front of him "Hi Jason, what can I do for you?"

"Turn on the News channel!"

Blackburn frowns, turning he looks at Davis, indicating that she should put the TV on

Davis is unsure what he means "Put the News channel on!" He nods towards the TV on the wall in his office and Davis does as she's asked. As the screen flashes to life, they all look at each other.

Blackburn lets out a sigh "Oh God! Jason I'll get back to you!"

Mandy and Davis look at each other as Eric stares at them

Mandy nods. She knows this is big and they need further information "I'm on it" She gets up and leaves the office immediately


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 10: No one knows anything**

** Briefing Room office 12hrs before Wheels up **

Clay's playing with the dog. Brock & Trent are chatting. Sonny's relaxed swinging in his chair with his feet on table watching Lisa.

She's typing on her laptop at the desk opposite him and they're smiling, covertly flirting with each other. He keeps raising his eyebrows and she keeps smiling when he does.

Ray's just quietly sitting there watching everyone. He's shutting the noise in the room out of his head.

Mandy's working. Typing fast on her laptop. Jason stands over her. He looks around at the others in the room, leaning in close, he hushes his voice so that the others can't hear.

"Hey" he looks around, again checking that no one's listening "So do you have anything for me?"

She looks up at him "No, nothing. I'm sorry."

"C'mon Mandy give me something. Anything." he frowns "C'mon please don't hold out on me"

She looks around the room also making sure they're not overheard "I'm sorry Jason, I _really_ don't have anything!"

He's annoyed and frustrated "Oh c'mon, you must know something" he pleads " I just.." he looks around he's so apprehensive, worried that the others might find out about who he's asking about "I just wanna know that she's okay."

"Jason seriously. I don't have _anything_ " she stares at him, her voice a really low whisper "It's all been sealed. The case files. They're locked down and no one's talking"

He shakes his head "God dammit! Mandy please, I need to know. Is she alright?" he sighs and makes a fist in frustration thumping it on the desk "God, I can't believe you're holding out on me! C'mon, with your clearance you gotta know something, right. Right?" he pushes harder, staring her in the eye.

"That's just the point. I can't tell you anything, because I don't know. I can't even get into the police report!"

he frowns "And that's not strange?"

She nods her head "Yes, yes it is!"

"So, what...what does that mean?" He leans on the desk with his knuckles, turning his back to the team

"It means..." She stops talking as Blackburn walks past them. She smiles and acknowledges him "...it means, that someone is covering something up" She looks up and coughs.  
Blackburn is ready to begin this mission briefing.

"You'll get me something though, for when I get back?"

"I'll work on it, But Jason, I can't promise anything"

Ray leans in as Jason sits down "You okay brother?" as Jason lifts his hat and rubs his head but doesn't speak "You see the news?" Ray keeps his voice quiet, so no one overhears

"Yeah!"

"Yeah? Yeah and what?"

"And nothing!" Jason shrugs "No one knows anything, Ray" he looks at him as continues to stare at him questioning him. He has this puzzled look on his face

Cerb barks making them all swing around in their seats. He wants the ball Clay's throwing around for him "You want it?... You want it?" Clay teases and smiles

Jason and Ray look up "He said anything?"

Ray shakes his head "No nothing so far. I'm not sure if he's seen the News. If he has then he hasn't mentioned it"

"Good. Let's try to keep it that way. At least until we get back. Last thing we need is his head going off the rails right now"

Sonny's watching and listening. He rocks back in his chair. _God dammit_ he sighs. He catches Rays eye and they give each other a concerned look

Blackburn's front and center ready to start "Right Gentlemen let's get this briefing underway"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Jason strides down the corridor in a hurry carrying his helmet. _  
That was some shit mission! I need a shower_ he grumbles under his breath. Rubbing the sand and the dirt from his hair.

Ray, Sonny and Clay are following behind him, chatting and not keeping up with his pace

"Jason!" Mandy calls him to the side of the corridor

He looks around and stops "You got something?"

"I had to call in some pretty _big_ favors to get this information. It's not much, but it's the best I've been able to do"

Looking around, checking who's watching them, she hands him the beige colored folder. He quickly scans the report contained inside "So according to this there _was_ someone else at the house?" he continues to fast reading "The police report in here says there's evidence of struggle and forensics found blood at the scene."

Mandy swallows the nervous lump in her throat as she looks at him and nods

"And that's it? This is all you know?"

" 'fraid so." she nods "As I said I had to call in some big favors just to get that"

"So, what's going on here?" He looks around, looking at Clay as he watches them from where he is at the water cooler. He looks away trying to make out he isn't trying to listen. She shrugs "Jason, I really don't know"

"Can you keep digging? I mean, there has to be something more than this." He hands back the file then looking over his shoulder at Clay he walks away.

"JASON!" she calls after him. "Look, .you're not supposed to know this. But...there was a report, a few weeks ago. About a transportation accident in which Brent Reagan was _officially_ killed while on a prisoner transfer"

"Yeah I saw the TV news reports about it. I guessed it was him" he frowns "Wait! You said officially, so .. what does that mean unofficially? Mandy what the hell are you saying?"

She looks around checking the corridor again "Look, this has to stay between us. I really shouldn't be telling you this he could risk my whole career. But..."she sighs ".. but between you and me. There were only two bodies at that scene, neither of which was Reagan!"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Clay's stands drinking the cup of water from the cooler while he watches Jason in deep conversation with Mandy. "What's going on with Jason and Ellis?" he nods towards them as he questions Ray

Ray stops and looks around at the two of them. He shakes his head "Who knows. Maybe a new spin up, some intel package she's working on?"

"It looks serious to me."

"Hey kid " Sonny frowns "I'll bet it's nothing for us to concern our heads with. You know us mushrooms will know, when we need to know." Sonny laughs changing the subject "All we need to do now right now is get cleaned up and then kick back with some lovely tequila! "

"Sounds good!" Clay says unconvincingly, He's suspicious that Jason's up to something and he wants to know what.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

They're all cleaned up. Walking out of the base to their vehicles.

"Hey Boss, so what's up with Ms Ellis?" Clay frowns as Jason keeps walking ignoring him "Jace wait..." But Jason still keeps walking. Clay sigh "Hey, hey did you hear me? What's going on?"

Jason stops and turns to face him "Yeah I heard you and it's and nothing. At least nothing to concern you"

"Well I saw you two deep in conversation. It must have been something important. And what was in the file?"

"You know, stick to things that do concern you, cos this doesn't" Jason strides away to his truck

"Okay sure! It's nothing to concern me. So why don't I believe you"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Sonny's picking the tequila shots up with his mouth, no hands "Here Davis you try!"

They all laughs as she gives it a go. She can't do it and knocks the tequila all over the table.  
Sonny then lines up some more "Hey Davis, it's all in the technique watch. You either have it or you don't " he laughs opening his arms out wide "And..." he picks up the glass chugs the tequila back and then drops the glass to the table ".. what can I say, Sonny Quinn has it!"

"Oh Sonny ..." She gives him one of her sexy smiles."...you definitely have it!" She's missed him this past four days and she really can't wait till they get back to the privacy of her apartment.

Sonny just keeps looking at her. _  
Oh god ! She is so damn sexy. I could kiss her right there in front of everyone. Sure, it would end my Navy career right now, but it would be so worth it!  
_  
It's probably the tequila talking but he's not even sure that he'd care. He takes a deep breath in. _God this is good to come back to.  
_ And as he looks at her body, he imagines what he's gonna do to it later. Then he puts his mouth round the next Tequila shot and knocks it back.

Ray's laughing but as he turns back to the table he can see Clay's lost deep in thought "Hey brother you okay?"

"Yeah sure" Clay smiles "No, you know what I'm gonna head back. I'm tired"

"Okay, sure thing. Get some rest, oh and don't worry I'll keep an eye on these kids." he laughs.

Clay looks around to see what going on. He reluctantly smiles. Ray's face drops, he lets out a long deep sigh. He's really worried about Clay; he hasn't been himself lately and he's not sure if he's letting the whole C.J thing go.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Clay crashes on to his couch with a sigh. It's quiet in the apartment which is nice after the noise of the past few days.

 _WOW ! That was some shit storm out there._ He moans to himself, running through the op in his head. He thinks how lucky they were to come back in one piece.

He switches on the TV , randomly flicking the channels with the remote. Finally, he settles on background noise of one of the news channels.

 _So, let's see what's going on in the world shall we._

He smiles to himself as some reports that relate to their mission come on. He shakes his head knowing the reports are fake "If only they knew the truth" he laughs

Then the report switches to something else  
"And Police still have no further leads in the Caroline Lewis killing. The wife of Admiral Roger Lewis was found dead at their Washington home five days ago. The Admirals office has declined to comment at this time"

Clay sits up with a jolt "What the fuck!" He can't believe what he's seeing and hearing.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 11: Where is she ?**

 **3 weeks later **

Clay's sitting leaning back on the chair in the office when he unexpectedly sees Jason hurry past the internal glass window ."Hey where's Jason going?"

Ray looks up and out towards the corridor. He frowns "You know I have no idea."

"Well, it looks like it must be important, wherever he's going, cos he's got his service uniform on!"

Ray looks puzzled "Well he's not said anything to me "

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason coughs nervously as he runs his finger around the, tight, collar on his uniform. He hates wearing full uniform, he'd rather his Tee and combats any day. Uniform is the one thing about the Navy he hates.

He's agitated as he sits anxiously waiting. Rubbing his sweating palms on his pants. He looks up and around at the painting on the walls trying to take his mind off what he's about to do.  
The secretary can see how nervous he is. She's used to it. Most people sitting where he is, are nervous.

Every so often she looks up from her computer, giving him a polite reassuring smile and Jason returns it with an apprehensive smile of his own.

He could be in any war zone in the world, coming under fire, but sitting here in _this_ office, dressed in his uniform, well that really does makes him nervous.

Then finally after what seems a lifetime, the large wooden oak door opens up "Right Master Chief, let's have you. You have ten mins, so make it quick"

The Admiral guides the way with his hand as he leads him into the large and imposing office, closing the door behind them.  
Jason coughs clearing his dry throat. He remains standing as he begins to speak "Thank you, for seeing me, Sir"

"So, what can I do for you Master Chief Hayes?" the Admiral's short and to the point. He looks at his watch "I have a meeting to attend so get on with it"

Jason's thinking about how to word what he wants to know. In fact, it's all he's been thinking about all morning on the way here. In the end he thinks it's just best to be straight. "Firstly, I'd like to offer my condolences, with regards to your wife"

The Admiral nods in acceptance. Jason coughs again. His throat is itchy, and his tongue feels parched he probably should have had a drink of water while he was waiting. "What I came here for was um...well I guess you know what want to know. What I need to know." he pauses "I need to know where she is?"

The Admiral lets out a long sigh and stares at him. He doesn't say a word. He looks Jason up and down getting the measure of him as he contemplates what he's going to say, "Where who is, Mr Hayes?"

"Sir, " he sighs shaking his head " I'm sorry if this appears rude, but we could dance around all day like this. And not being funny, you were the one who said ten minutes. So, excuse me if I'm blunt and cut to it, but you know exactly _who_ I'm talking about" Then he swallows hard again before he asks "Catherine, where is she?"

He hardly ever calls her by her full name, but it just feels appropriate right now. He stares as the Admiral is firm standing ridged not showing any emotion. Then he smiles. He admires his direct approach. But he still doesn't reply.

"Sir, I need to know was she at the house?" he waits again for an answer, but still the Admiral doesn't move or respond.

Jason frowns and tries again "Is she dead too? Is that what you're covering up?" He sighs frustrated by this silence " Sir, please!" He tried to prepare himself on the way here for that news but now he's here he's hoping that's not the answer he gets.

The Admiral smiles, the smug grin slowly creeps across his lips at Jason's persistence "You know, in some ways I have to admire you Master Chief" he takes a deep breath " You come here like this, even after _all_ this time, all the trouble she's caused you. My god..." he laughs "...what she nearly cost you. Your career, your marriage and yet somehow you still will _not_ stay away from her. It's unbelievable really."

He may laugh but truth is he's playing for time. Thinking his words over carefully. Wondering what he can tell him to satisfy his curiosity. What will he believe and what he won't? The Admiral changes his tone "I'm sorry. But, I can't tell you anything. So, you appear to have had a wasted journey"

Jason watches him pace to the large sash window "Look Sir, as I said with all due respect.." Jason tries softening his tone, hoping he might appeal to the Admiral as a father now " I just want to know that she's alright?"

The silence between them could cut glass. Jason can now feel his temper rising "Oh for god sake. Tell me! _PLEASE_ I just need to know that she's safe."

The Admiral turns from the window and weighs up Jason up. The raw emotion of his speech. "If I don't tell you something then you're not going to leave this alone are you?"

"No Sir. No, I'm sorry I can't. I have to know" He takes a deep breath in

"Look Jason, all I can tell you is, yes, yes at the moment she is alright" He nods thinking about what he's telling him "But really, you do _need_ to let this go. Not only for your own sake but Catherine's too"

Jason breathes a sigh of relief "Sorry Sir, but like I said, I can't." he's relived to know she's alive. But now he needs to know more "I need to know where, where is she? Just at least tell me that"

The Admiral holds his breath as if he going to say something, then he pauses and sighs. He looks at his watch again "I think your ten minutes is up"  
He pursues his lips together tight annoyed by Jason's continual push for information "I'm sorry Mr Hayes, it's been a rather trying few weeks. And as I said I have meeting to get to"

"I'm not leaving until I know where she is" Jason digs his heels in standing his ground. Staring the Admiral full in the face.

"Mr Hayes sometimes as an officer we have to make unemotional decisions. As a team leader you will be well aware that emotions can cloud judgements. And clouded judgement that can get people killed"

Jason frowns wondering what he means "Sir all I want to know is where she is. That's it. Then I'll leave" he gulps, he's tense wondering what he could be holding back. What it is he's trying to conceal from him "Is she hurt?"

He pauses a moment wondering if he should divulge what he knows, or if he should just keep it to himself about the classified information that Mandy told him. That he saw in the file  
"I know she was at the house, when her mother…. and I know that the report said someone else was at the house also. That the forensics found blood as the scene. Was it hers"?

The admiral looks surprised by the revelation that Jason knows this information, and they stand staring at each other eye to eye.

Then he smiles "You're very resourceful Mr Hayes. I'm not sure why that surprises me exactly. After all, it's one of the reasons my daughter was attracted to you " He nods "A quality like that, it's stood you, and your team in good stead I'm sure." he pauses frowning at Jason "But don't let that be your undoing now, or my daughters"

Jason frowns he's not sure what he means by that. "Sir where is she? Please just tell me"

The admiral turns his back and once again stares out of the large floor to ceiling window of his office. He's contemplating, in silence, what if anything, to tell Jason.  
Minutes tick by and he still doesn't say anything. Finally, he takes a deep breath and exhales. "Fine! Fine, you really want to know where she is? Then I'll tell you. She's at a medical facility. One for addictions. She's there getting treatment."

"Rehab?!" Jason's frowns, he's taken aback by the revelation "I...I don't understand. Treatment? Treatment for what?"

The Admiral lets out a deep sigh "Catherine, has a serious alcohol and medication problem. Pain Medication addiction mainly" he shakes his head. "As you're probably aware her consumption of alcohol in the past was ... " he sighs shaking his head " But um... lately, since her injuries, and since you came back into her life it's um... it's gotten out of hand. In the end I had no choice but to have her committed"  
He closes his eyes and takes a long deep breath in and then slowly lets it out "Oh Jason…she's been a mess since she came back home. She hasn't been coping with the pain. She wasn't sleeping, just crying all the time. As you know that's not her. Then on top of the drinking she became more and more reliant on the pills to get her through" He shakes his head "You know her, everything in excess!"

Jason thinks back as he tries to make sense of this "But I don't get it. I thought she was getting better. Yeah I know she's always drank way too much, but.. she always handled it. But, painkillers?" he closes his eyes to think "I suppose, I mean, now I think, she was taking quite a lot. But it was still early days and she had a lot of intense pain at one point and so I guess I didn't think anything of it"

Jason sighs, he does remember. He remembers her always requesting more, Trent giving her injections to top them up. But he just thought it was normal because of her injuries.

The Admiral continues " I... " he hesitates. "... I also had to make another decision. It's not one I'm proud of and I.. I know what that would have done to her, inside. I had to um... have her medically discharged from the Navy"  
He's silent as they both reflect on how much of an impact that would have had on her "As I say it's not a decision I took lightly, but it's one that had to be made, for her own good. And her reputation in the Navy"

He bites his lip thinking about it " She would have never taken that decision for herself and she would've just kept pushing to get herself fit. It was impossible. It became an uncontrollable spiral"

He stops just staring as Jason nods his head in quiet agreement "Jason, I can justify what and why I did but _Pheww!_ That didn't stop her hating me for it. The problems just got worse from there, and so …we're at this point now. Dealing with it."

"Woah! I mean, that would have crushed her. Losing her job, the Navy. Hell..." he rubs his head trying to imagine how she would have felt. "... even a desk job would have broken her heart"

The Admiral nods "I know. No-one more than me knows what she put in, to get to where she was at. And we both know how hard she fought to break those last barriers, only to keep getting knocked back. Even I couldn't fix that for her" he smiles "But, a decision had to be made. The other thing is… he doesn't know about her Mother yet. I've kept it from her. They think it would be too much for her to cope with. She's very fragile right now, and the Doctor, he thinks it would be too much"

"Oh Jeez ! I'm sorry" Jason perches on the edge of the desk and rubs his hands over his forehead. He lets out a deep long sigh _"SHIT,_ what a mess"

"Yes it is" the Admiral composes himself "Well, hopefully that answers your questions Mr Hayes?" he looks at his watch "as I said I need to go now"

Jason goes quiet and thinks "Where?"

The Admiral turns to look at him "Mr Hayes, we're done here, now" he walks towards the door and opens it

"Where?" Jason pleads " Which facility? I need to see her"

"That's impossible. She needs complete rest. No visitors I'm afraid. It's part of the terms of the facility and it won't do you, or her any good to see each other. The best thing is for you to forget about her and move on with your life" He turns around looking him in the eye "Jason, we both know from recent events, losing a love one is very painful. It takes time to get over, but eventually we must move forward. She needs to move forward and she can't do that with you in her life"

He shows Jason out of the door "Now, goodbye Mr Hayes" he beckons him out and closes the door behind him

"Sir!..." Jason's not happy but he does as he's asked. He salutes first and then leaves.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Back out in the waiting room Jason stands thinking. _Something's not right._

He's trying to process what he's just been told, but his gut is telling him _Something doesn't add up here._ There's something not right with what Admiral was telling him.

He sighs his head spins. _I know something though; I need to get out of this uniform"_

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Taking off his collar and undoing his jacket as he walks to his cage. He needs to sit down.

"Hey" Clay there and he stands clinging to the metal grill on the door. He's watching as Jason starts to take off his uniform "Where have you been?"

There's no answer. And after a few minutes of silence Clay dares to speak again "You went to see _him_ , didn't you? Admiral Lewis."

He's taking an intellectual guess at where Jason has been. Jason looks up and nods. "Yeah!"

The information the Admiral told him is still going around in his head. Clay stands silently thinking. Neither of them look at each other. After another minute or so Clay swallows and breaks the silence

"Is she okay?" They have this kind of uneasy truce about her going on. An acknowledgement of each other's feelings. Clay's waiting for answer which doesn't come "I said, is she okay?"

Finally, Jason shrugs "So he says," he stops talking and frowns "But I'm not so sure. Something's not right"

Clay watches Jason's reaction "What do you mean somethings not right? Why, what did he say?"

Jason looks up at him. He can't speak. He just shrugs. He's still processing everything for himself. Now Ray enters the room. He doesn't realise the conversation they're having.

"Hey boss what's up?" he says cheerfully then noting the silence and their collective response to him he stands frowning, watching them.

Sonny now opening up his cage. He's whistling a loud and repetitive tune. He turns around to look at the silent room "Wow did someone die?" He jokes and laughs. Then as the make not reaction he frowns "Okay, so please tell me someone did _not_ die? It was just a joke"

"Not now Sonny" Ray stops him

"Okay so is one of you going tell us what's going on?" he looks between them "Jason? Clay?"

Clay looks at the floor. He coughs whilst swinging on the cage door. Ray weighs up the way they're looking and Jason's uniform. "So has this got something to do with the news report?"

He frowns, biting his lip nervously as he waits for one of them to respond "Okay, so what did he say? Jason? Did you hear me? What did her father say? Cos, that's where you went, right?"

"Wait!" Sonny frowns "What's going on here I feel like I'm the dunce of the class. What does he mean _what did her father say_? And what's with your uniform? Are you in trouble again? Something to do with CJ?"

He looks at Ray and back to Jason "Will someone, please, tell me what the hell's going on otherwise I'm gonna start losing my shit with ya all?"

Jason shrugs and sighs "Ahhh! I'm not sure what's going on, myself. He.. he...the Admiral he said, He said that she's in rehab"

"Who's in rehab?" Sonny's still confused. Then the realisation comes, and he closes his eyes and shakes his head "WOW! Oh, jeez man!" he lets out a massive sigh. "Well, I guess there's one party too many, even for her!" he laughs

Jason glares at him "She's not there for just drinking. Painkillers. She's been taking too many painkillers as well"

Sonny nods and smiles . "Well, we might have guessed that, I mean knowing her. She always did do everything in excess" he shrugs as everyone looks at him "Well it's the truth. So, is she gonna be okay?" he does now show a little concern

"I don't know. I'm still getting my head round it"

Clay rubs his head he's thinking about it too.

"So, you haven't seen her? " Ray asks.

Jason shakes his head. "No. No, he won't tell me where she is" He looks up at the guys "but something's not right, I can feel it"

"Well obviously durrr! Not if she in rehab!" Sonny laughs as he starts to change his clothes.

Jason just glares at him. and Ray shakes his head "Sonny, enough with the wisecracks man"

"NO, I mean what he told me" Jason sighs "I think he's lying about something"

Ray frowns "Brother, I know you don't wanna hear that about her, but man, why would he lie? I mean come on man, the guy's an Admiral, not to mention he's her father. So why would he lie about something like this?"

"Yeah Jace, why you think he would lie?" Clay frowns "Seriously what you don't think she's in the rehab? You know if I think about it, she did cane the meds, and drink pretty hard"

"Come on man! Jason seriously? You of all people know what she's like. She don't do nothing by halves" Sonny says pulling his T shirt over his head. Ray, Sonny and Clay all look at each other but Jason's still staring at the floor.

Ray folds his arms. Sonny shakes his head. Clay exchanges glances with them both. They're all concerned now; they really don't know what's going on in Jason's head.

"Shit!" Sonny says shaking his head _Sure as hell now Jason's not gonna leave this alone now! Dammit!_ He says to himself as he slams his cage door shut.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 12: This might interest Mandy**

**2 weeks later **

Clay's bored. They haven't had any good spin ups in ages. All been small random missions, nothing they can get their teeth into. And now he's sat here again, in the briefing room, bouncing the dog ball back and forward off of the wall.

"Hey, Poster Boy! If you don't stop doing that, I'm gonna ram that ball so far up your ass you'll have to send a team of cave divers to retrieve it, you understand me?"  
Sonny's swinging on his chair his head leaned over the back whilst wearing his shades. His brain's banging on the inside of his skull, the result of too much tequila and a whiskey sours last night with Davis.

Ray looks at Clay and smiles "Seriously I'd stop, I think he means it!"

Clay pulls a face at Sonny, but then stops bouncing the ball.

"I can see you Mr Spenser, and if I _was_ able to get out of this chair, which I can't, I can assure you I would kick your pretty little butt"

Clay smiles as he puts the ball down on the table and Sonny sighs as peace is restored in the room once again. "Thank you! Now where wus I? Oh yeah, closing my eyes and getting some zzz's "

He smiling to himself, remembering last night's session. How hard him and Davis hit it, in more ways than one. _Jeez that girl is feisty chick_ _Mmmm...mmm!_

He has to admit that Clay might have been right, there was definitely something in what he said about sex being better with Navy girls.

Yeah it wasn't all soft and tender. It wasn't even like sex with Strippers, though they were in general more flexible. No, these girls have more fight, more strength and spirit and he's definitely starting to see the attraction. Perhaps he was wrong when he told Clay sex was sex. _  
Mind I don't think I'll remind him of that conversation_. He smiles, drifting back to thoughts of last night.

"Hey Sonny, did you get laid last night?" Clay asks watching as Sonny grins to himself.

"Sure did." he smiles again "And she was a damn hot tamale, oh yes Sir!"

He still has his eyes closed and doesn't see as Davis enters the room. "Oh my god I tell ya... she has this neat little party trick that she does with her tongue and oh man! It makes me so horny just thinking about it. She rode me like a rodeo bull!"

"Hey Davis" Clay shouts across the room "Sonny's girl last night, she's got some party trick. We were hoping he's gonna to tell us what it is. So, you might wanna cover your ears."

Sonny hearing Davis's name quickly tries to sit up and in doing so tips his chair backward landing with a heavy thud to the floor. "Shit Davis! I didn't hear you come in"

She licks her lips smiling trying to keep a straight face. "Hot was she? This rodeo girl."

Sonny looks at her and smiles "Damn hot! She turns me right on!"

Davis averts her eyes as she blushes, thinking back to last night's activities and Sonny and his cowboy hat.

"Hey Sonny, don't go letting on about your sex life, you're making Davis blush" Clay laughs

Davis puts her head down. She can feel her cheeks flush again bright red again

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Jason heads to the briefing room, he's followed in by Blackburn.

Blackburn is heading up the mission brief today. "Gentlemen, Mexican drugs cartel La Gomez. Intel suggest they are holding our target. We are going in to extract the informant. His name is documented on a list given to Agent Ellis. The list appears to contain other informants and undercover field agents, who all may have been compromised"  
He pauses, looking around the room at the team "This will be an ongoing operation. Extracting each target as intel becomes available, intel which Ms Ellis is currently working on."

He brings up a map and some photographs "Our HVT is being held here. We believe this is a current cocaine factory. The location is pretty remote in some pretty in hospitable forest terrain. Agent Ellis, will be advising once she has an updated sit rep. She is currently sourcing intel to verify the credentials of the list and those contained on it."

Mandy's on her laptop at the table beside Jason where he's sitting. He leans in over her should and whispers to her "You had anything about that rehab facility yet?"

"No, I'm still working on it" she looks up at the frown on his face "Look Jason, it's never easy were medical records are concerned."

She looks around to make sure no one is listening to their conversation "Some of these clinics are very exclusive, VIPs and celebrity patients. So, getting access to their patient lists and records takes time. Medical records are notoriously difficult ... even for the CIA"

"Well, work faster. I _need_ to know where she is!"

Mandy sighs, looking him in the eyes "Jason don't take this the wrong way, because I say it as a friend, but.. maybe just let her be. Wherever she is just let her stay there and get well"

He shrugs her off "No! No, you look..." he checks round making sure Blackburn doesn't hear him "..I don't believe his bullshit story. It just doesn't add up. And if she's not in rehab, then where the hell is she? Mandy, what the hell is he covering up?"

"Jason why can't you admit it, that she might actually be there." Mandy does eels sorry for him, but she can't help but think that he isn't thinking as clearly as he should. "Her whole psych profile fits. Addictive personality, long term serious injury, use of high dose pain medication"  
She looks at him and sighs again "Jason, you know she use to drink, a lot. So, maybe she just added the pills to that list" She shakes her head " Maybe you have to accept she's actually human and that she's just pushed it too far and needs help."

"No! No, I've been thinking about this and I know I sound crazy." he stops "But that report said there was a struggle at the house, there was blood, damage. C'mon, you know C.J she would have always put up a fight" He looks her in the eye "Mandy, you know what I'm saying is right"

Mandy frowns, she's still having doubts and he can see it "Jesus Christ Mandy! Her mother was shot in the head. That's an execution, not a break and enter. If she's alive, then I think someone has her"

Mandy can see he's been thinking about this "But why would her father say she was in rehab? Jason that makes no sense!"  
She's concerned he's overthinking the whole thing but there's also something that puzzles her too "Surely he'd be dealing with this? I mean, Admiral Lewis has access to specialist operators and teams, CIA intel and god knows what else. He could have the best in the world at his fingertips to go retrieve her if someone was holding her"

She looks him deep in the eyes "Jason, this is absurd. Look, from what I know, there's been no demands. No leaked chatter about her, or him, on any websites that I've been tracking. I'm sorry Jason, I want to believe you, I do. But the whole thing it makes no sense but being in rehab does"  
She sighs "I'm sure something would have flagged with me, somehow, if this was going on, but there's been nothing." She feels so sorry for him and she can see he's hurting "Okay, okay so say it is true and she's not in rehab, then what are you saying?"

"I'm saying I think... I think she's been taken and that it was planned"  
He's careful to keep his voice down " Look, we know someone took her once before and that wasn't random. We know it was organised at a very high level. That someone pulled strings and got her on that mission in Nigeria. None of that was coincidence. Perhaps we got her back before they got what they wanted to know." He raises his eyes

"And what about that chatroom? Clay said they wanted a payment, and Reagan coming back after her at the hospital. That's too many things happening there. I think it was a warning. A warning to him that they could get to her. Mandy please, just think about this!"

He shakes his head seeing she's still not buying his theory "Oh for god sake! They covered the disappearance of a prisoner. That has to be high level, right?"

She sighs letting out a deep breath. He does have a point as she still had no theory for what happened there. He tries one more thing to try and convince her "Okay. So, what if that first time, when Clay said she was at the bar, with him. What if they were going to take her then? C'mon he said he thought someone in the bar knew then who she was. What if Clay interfered with their plans that night too?"

She shakes her head, it all sounded too farfetched but at the same time there were too many things that didn't make sense.

"Mandy, we've seen hundreds of those internet videos and we both know on ninety nine percent of times, how they end. So why did they keep her alive?"

She looks at Jason like he's gone crazy but some of what he says makes sense. She sighs  
"Jason are you sure you're not letting your emotions cloud your judgement on this?" she looks at him with sympathy "That there's a much simpler explanation, like she does have an addiction problem "

He stops talking and just stares at her "Wait! What you just said, that's what he said. _Emotions cloud judgement gets people killed._ What was he telling me? Mandy what are we not seeing here? Can you do something for me." he looks around, Blackburn is still drinking his coffee and looking through the maps with Ray  
"I need you to look into her Father. See what Admiral Lewis is involved in. Maybe it has some connection to him. See what committees he's on. What he actually does. Anything that would make _him_ a target for blackmail"

"Jason!" she checks over her shoulder "Do you know what you are asking? Jesus Christ, you want me to look into the background of an Admiral of the US NAVY without arousing any suspicions or flagging anything up. You're crazy. There's no way I can do it. If there is a leak at that level, there will be no one I can trust, believe me."  
She scowls at him as he tips his head on one side looking at her in that cute way he does when he wants something. "Fine!" she smiles "Okay, okay I'll see what I can find out" she sighs "But I'm not promising you anything."

"Thanks" he smiles "I just want to know she's alright. That's all!"

"Are you sure, that's _all_ you want to know?"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Mandy coughs "Davis, I need you to do something for me. But this has to stay off radar. I need you to search some bank accounts for me"

She puts a list beside Davis's laptop "This is, strictly, between you and me" she nods "And you need to be discreet"

Davis looks at the list and at Mandy. She frowns "Sure, I can do that but... " she's puzzled

"Just do it okay, keep it low key. If I start doing it, it'll flag up too quickly"

"Can I ask? Is this something to do with Jason & C.J?"

"Lisa don't ask me any questions I can't answer, alright. Thanks"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Sonny is making whiskey sours in Davis's kitchen "So madam, here is your whiskey and what else can I get you? Maybe the same as last night ? Or would you like to see tonight's special?" he's standing behind the kitchen counter with only his cowboy hat on.

She has just come out of the shower and is wrapped only in a small pink towel. She smiles seductively. "Oh, I don't know, what else do you have to offer there cowboy?"

"Well come with me and I will show you my wares pretty lady!"  
He picks her up off her feet, making her squeal and carries her to the bedroom. He lays her down and undoes her towel "Oh my lord Davis, you are a real sight to behold"

She smiles "Come here cowboy, let's see what you got for me" She pulls his head down and starts to kiss him, as he puts his hands on her breasts, massaging them firmly, before flipping her over so that she's sitting, legs straddled across his waist, on top of him.

"Oh god Davis, that feels so good!"  
He loves the feeling as she starts to ride her body up and down his shaft. Him holding her hips, pulling her closer to him. As she gets a faster rhythm going, he puts his hand on her clit rubbing at it one handed with the other on her nipple, pulling and tweaking.

She leans back sliding up and down his pole while he lays there closing his eyes. It's not long before the stimulation for them both gets too much "Aahhhhh... Sonny! Oh goddddd! Oh god, I'm gonna ... Oh yeah, yeah !"

She grinds herself against him more firmly, her breasts bouncing up and down as he fondles them. His warm load ready and waiting to fill her wet hole. Then as she writhes back again "Oh yessssss!" she screams out loud "Oh Yesss! Oh, oh Yes... oh god!"

Her words drive him to the edge and his cum explodes inside her "Oh Lisa! oh my.. God!"

He relaxes back smiling as she leans forward resting her head on his chest. Her eyes look up and smile at him . Oh yes, Sonny had, had some great sex in his time but this he thought.  
 _This was like discovering the holy grail_

They lay quiet. Sonny has his arm under Lisa, and she has her eyes shut as she turns sideways and cuddles up to him. He also has his eyes shut and she's not sure if he's asleep "What's Jason up to?" she asks

He squints looking at her as he lifts the brim of his hat "What you mean by that?"

"Just stuff "

"Just stuff?" he frowns "Now Davis don't be sayin' _just stuff_ like that then not tell me. Cos if you say things like that I start to think somethin' s wrong. Then if I don't get an answer I have to go asking all kind of questions and getting myself into trouble. You don't want that now do you ya?"

She licks her lips and leans up to look at him "Okay I'll tell ya. But you have to promise not to say anything"  
She's biting her bottom lip as she thinks about what she's about to tell him "Mandy's asked me to check some stuff out for her, discreetly. And ... " She pauses " C.J's ..."

Sonny closes his eyes "Oh dear god... here we go!"

She starts again "No listen...C.J's... fathers name. Was on the list she gave me"

"Why are they go getting you involved?" he frowns and looks at her "Miss Mandy has CIA clearance so why's she going through you?"

"I don't know. But Sonny, I thought the rumor was that C.J was in rehab?"

"Yeah, well yeah where she's supposed to be but..." he sighs " but Jason's got some notion, some Jason type gut feelin'..." he sighs again "... that she's not. That her father lied to him"  
He rolls his eyes "Jeez! I think it's more wishful thinking on his part"

"Serious why? Why would he think that?"

"Not man nor beast would know that. Ahhh Jeez! So, now Jason's going on some unicorn hunt to try and find her"  
He lays back and closes his eyes "Jeez you know what? I god damn wish; well it might be better if she hadn't made it back from Nigeria. All the trouble she's causes"

He sighs and shakes his head "And here she is again messing with Jason's head. I thought I sorted this damn problem once. Not forgetting Blondie boy. He's still not put his dick back in pants yet either. Still pining for the little bitch"

Lisa can see how much it's stressing him "Hey c'mon. Sonny come here!" she kisses him. He's reluctant. "You're doing too much thinking" she puts her hand round his cheek and pulls him towards here "I said come here Cowboy" she smiles. "Sonny relax.. it'll be fine!"

He opens his eyes as she kisses him "Well okay pretty lady if you say so." He smiles as he smacks her in fun on the butt making her scream out. Then he pulls her back on top of him once again as he starts kissing her.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Mandy answers the call. She frowns as she sees the name on the screen of an ex-CIA associate, who's become more of a friend lately. She smiles as she sees his name on her phone

"Hey, how are you?"

"Mandy, can we meet?"

"Um... okay, sure. Where and when?"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

They meet at the cafe where they've met before. She pulls out the chair and sits down as he hands her a file. "What's this?"

He doesn't answer as she opens the cover to a list, photos of bodies and pictures of cartel members.  
The head of the cartel she's been recently tracking, Gomez, and a picture of their target for the mission. "So, he's still there?"

"He is but there's a change in the intel. We now think he's now working with them, fully, not undercover. It looks like the lure of the money, and the power, has gotten too much to resist"

She looks at Reuben and frowns "Sorry, who did you say you work for now?"

"I don't think I did." he smiles as he sips his coffee

She gives him a flirtatious smile and bites her lip as she flicks through the photos in the file. It shows their target shooting a man in the head", But we've had rogue agents before, so why are you showing me this now?"

"I thought you might be interested"

She's suspicious. "Okay, well we'll get him out" she nods "I can use him for intel, or I'll throw him in jail " she smiles " or I might do both!"

Reuben nods. He loves her business-like manner "Just be careful Mandy. This may have consequences that won't be apparent" He kisses her on the cheek

She frowns looking at him "What does that mean? Consequences"

"We'll speak again soon"

As she continues to flick through the file. She suddenly comes to a stop as a picture of a woman that catches her eye.  
"Shit!" She holds up the picture "C.J!" she frowns "Reuben, why is this picture in here?"

She can now see there are more photographs of CJ some which feature her mother and her shopping. "What the... hell?" she looks up to ask him for answers, but the seat in front of her is empty and Reuben is gone.


	12. Chapter 12

**There's something you need to see**

Clay rocks back in the chair waiting for the briefing to start.

Sonny's watching Davis's cute butt walking around prepping stuff. He's thinking about the things they've been doing.

She can feel his eyes on her and every now and again she looks up, smiling. Now she's sat back at her laptop, staring at the screen but she's not focusing, not registering anything on it.

She sighs to herself thinking about her and Sonny. She's thinking about how intense it's been lately. That maybe, they should slow things down. Because the last thing they need is for it all to blow up in their faces.  
After all, as Davis reminds herself _We don't have an 'Admiral Daddy' to call on to save our careers._ She sighs, before she gets back on with her preparations.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Ray's sighing and Clay frowns at him "Hey, what's up?"

"Oh, nothing really, just Naima!" he sighs again "She's going on about decorating" he pulls a face "I was hoping this spin up was gonna be something big, not another in and out, keep us away for a few days."

Clay laughs, he looks up toward the door as Jason arrives. He looks like shit. He looks like he hasn't been sleeping. He looks on edge. This thing with CJ it's starting to take its toll on him. And he and Ray are starting to worry now.

Ray watches him as he gets a coffee from the machine, then he looks at Clay " I hope he snaps out of this soon!"

"You know what?" Clay sighs " I hope she turns up in a rehab somewhere it would certainly be better for everyone, I think!"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Blackburn arrives for the briefing with Mandy.

"Good afternoon ladies" He smiles, before shuffling his papers on the desk "I'm going to hand over to Ms Ellis but before I do I need to let you know that we're on a twelve hour push back."  
He listens as there's a collective groan from the team. He sighs "I know but...that's the way it is"

"Jeez!" Sonny sighs, he was thinking about what he was going do with Davis when they got back. He wasn't planning on still sitting here for twelve more hours.

"It's due to an intel update. HVT location has changed Sit rep on the ground is getting a full update, so we need to make changes to the operation prep" he looks up "Don't worry, same target, same country, just different extraction point. Standard extract, you've done it a hundred times before!"

"Shit! That's just great. Just what we need!" Jason sighs as he screws up the paperwork on the desk and throws it in the trash can "Eric, you know how much I hate changes."

"So why the change?" Ray's concerned. Changes are never good especially when they already prepped to go.

"Ms Ellis" Blackburn hands over

"Alberto LeRicca!" she points to the picture on the screen " _Was_ an FBI agent. He was in deep cover posing as a member of the Gomez drug cartel." she shuffles some papers "It appears from recent information that have recently come into my possession, that he has now gone rogue!"  
She pauses looking around the room "It would seem, the money, status, lavish lifestyle... and, by the looks of things, a personal penchant for violence." she raises her eyes " Has turned his head"

She puts her hand on her hip and brings up a Villa house pic on the monitors. "We believed, until yesterday, that he was being held as a captive on this remote farm" She points to the original maps they were using " But, it now appears" she changes the picture on the monitor "... that is far from true. Rather than being a captive, our intel now suggests he is running this luxury and heavily fortified, compound."

Everyone looks at each other. Ray and Jason have their arms folded, pulling very similar expressions. They're still pissed about the push back.

"Your brief is still to bring him back. This time he will be coming back as a fugitive and not as a hostage. He should not be trusted!"  
She looks around the room "But, he will have very useful cartel intel, so we do need him back alive!" she flicks the screen pics again bring up layouts of the compound.

"Walk in the park. Done it a million times!" Jason says "Rapid extraction. In out. Boom!" Jason makes it sound so simple.

Ray tips his head and frowns at Clay. They both know it's never as simple as that. "Jace, we have to remember these guys are usually heavily armed, they will be ready."

Mandy continues "I have in my intel package, a list. It has names of potentially compromised undercover agents. Therefore, there may be several more of this rapid extraction on the cards in the coming days or weeks. As an when I get intel updates."

"Davis, you're up!" Blackburn calls for her input as she brings up the layout plans of the house They all sit round her model and plan to go over the infill points.

Mandy bites her lip and continues "This compound is heavily fortified. And, it seems he is now completely trusted by the cartel. Recent intel photos show that he is in sole control of the compound. Who goes in. Who goes out and ...how!"

She looks around the room and flicks through some gruesome photos on the screen "We need to know who else he is working with. He wasn't the only other agent working on this particular undercover op. Their names also appear on the list in my possession. Be aware we don't know which side any of them are working for at this point"

They all look at each other. "So, do we get to see this list?" Clay asks

"It's classified at this time"

Mandy glances up at Blackburn as he answer him "Not your concern, gentlemen" he looks back to her nodding "Your concern is the specific targets you are given"

"Yep! Clay, we are but little shiny mushrooms. Keep ups covered in that bull shit and in the dark" Sonny rocks back in his chair laughing

"We go in execute, extract and get out. That's our job. Not to question the why." Blackburn reminds them. More photos of the inside of the Villa come up on the screen "Okay..." he looks at his watch " Wheels up twelve hours. Get some rest."

Mandy takes a deep breath in "Eric, these things can seem so simple, and I know they've done it a hundred times before, but we also know they're never always as cut and dried as Jason says. I hope he's in the right place for this?"

"Hmm! Yeah he does seem a bit on edge lately, I'll have a word" Blackburn also has concerns "You think he's gonna be okay?"

"I don't know" Mandy frowns " But I hope so"

Sonny gets some coffee from the machine and Davis brings her cup over "You got something for me there cowboy?" she smiles

"Well now I did, but it seems the boss is gonna keep you waiting for my delights until I get back unless... "

"Unless what?" she frowns, flirtily biting her lip.

"Well there's bathrooms down the hall we could.."

"Sonny, NO!" she looks around at the room. "NO! No way!"

"Ahhh, Davis you're no fun!" he smiles teasing her "See, that's why you wouldn't make a tier one, you're not a risk taker!"

She smiles, she loves it when he jokes with her.

"Well then Davis " he takes a deep breath in "then I guess you're gonna have to keep lusting for this body till I get back" he smiles as he pours her a coffee.

She smiles back "Guess I'll have to think of a special homecoming surprise then" she bites her lip in that little special way she does

"Oh lordy! You know this bad guy, well he better be packed and ready to go, cos I'm bagging him and getting back ASAP at that thought!"

She drinks from her cup keeping her eyes flirtatiously on him.

"You got more coffee in there?" Ray frowns watching them

"Ummm! Yeah, yeah sure!" she says swallowing the nerves she has from Ray taking her by surprise. "Help yourself" She walks away now worrying that he overheard them.

"Something going on Brother?" he asks Sonny

"Nope! just passing the time of day"

Ray sighs "I hope not. This team can't be doing with any more drama"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason's at the table with his feet up. Both hands on his head deep in thought

"You okay brother?"

He Nods and sighs as he speaks "Nothing Ray! Nada, not a thing! No one knows anything or if they do they're not saying"

"Look man, you gonna have to let it go for now. Keep your focus on the work. Something will come up!" he looks around "Did Trent have no luck? "

"No, her medical file is locked from central. He tried to put in a request to add some information see if it flagged up a location but central just rejected the email" he sighs. "I don't know what else to do Ray. But, I'm telling ya something's not right here."

"Jason look, hang in there brother" Ray slaps him on the shoulder reassuringly. Breaking the tension Ray rolls his eyes and jokes "Could be worse. You could be facing decorating hell with Naima" Ray frowns and smiles.

Jason smiles back and laughs. "Yeah that's pretty bad!"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

They halo in under dark and get to the compound. They've done this kind of extraction before so it's a pretty standard op.

They go in hard, taking out the outer security, working their way in until they're in the main house.

They see their target. He's outside smoking cigarettes on the terrace to his main office room.

In a rapid move they're inside and have him bagged and zip tied and on his knees. "HAVOC this is BRAVO 1 we have JACKPOT; repeat we have Jackpot"

LeRicca is on his knees and Jason photographs him "Say cheese for the camera" He sends it back to HAVOC as the rest of the team start a sweep of the house.

Jason searches him, while Sonny does his desk and office. "All BRAVO call signs. This is Bravo one, we need to wrap it up guys." he looks at his watch "One hour to ex fill, Let's get this done!"

Sonny is on over watch out of the office window. Jason's questioning but LeRicca's not saying a word.

The rest of the team start to sweep the rooms on the first floor. There are doors banging sounds of kicking interspersed with shouts of "CLEAR!".

There are two more locked doors along the corridor, and Clay kicks one in.  
"BRAVO 1 this is BRAVO 6 we have a target" he points his weapon. There's a badly cut & beaten man tied up on the floor. "Hands up! Hands up!" Clay screams pointing in an up motion with his rifle.

The man is shaking and follows instructions, as best he can. Putting his hands up. "Help me! ...Please, help me!" He cries

"Okay, it's okay." Clay says as he zip ties him, a precaution, not all prisoners are as they seem so till he's sure he will remain bound under Clay's control.

"Get me out please!" he begs "Help me, get me out!"

Clay takes his picture and sends it to Davis so they can do an identification. "'It's _POSITIVE_! Mandy, he's one of the other names on your list! Luis Diego used to be DEA but went undercover nearly two years ago. Has been radio silent for the past six months"

"Bravo 6 this is HAVOC; you need to bring him back with you. He's on the list, Copy"

"Copy that HAVOC. Come on get up, it's time to go" the shaking man get to his feet. "We'll get you medical attention. Bravo 1 this is 6 we got an extra passenger bringing him down now"

One last door and then they're out of there. Ray kicks it in while Trent covers him.

It's all dark and quiet in the room and as Ray flicks the switch for the main light they notice that there's someone asleep on the bed.

Ray covers Trent with his weapon, as he goes to look. Whoever it is hasn't moved. even when the light went on. Trent can see they are handcuffed to the bed rail. And as he turns them over unsure if they are alive. They're certainly unconscious.

As Trent turns them over he and Ray both take a sharp intake of breath. They collectively curse in tandem "SHIT!"

Clay's headed in their direction, toward the room. He's sent Brock downstairs with Diego.

"BRAVO 1 this is BRAVO 2, Copy"

"Copy, BRAVO 2 are we ready to rock and roll out of here?"

"BRAVO 1, that's a negative. We have a bit of a situation up here. I think you might need to come take a look. First floor ASAP You really need to see this. Copy."

Clay arrives at the door and as Trent moves from beside the bed to get some things from his kit bag Clay's mouth falls open in shock "Oh My God!"


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13: Hangover from hell**

Clay looks at Trent and then at Ray. "Bravo 1. _DID_ you copy that?"

"COPY Bravo 2. On my way. This better be good, we got an exfil to meet" Jason does the stairs two at a time.  
They're tight on the deadline for exfil now.

Clay searches his back pack and takes some bolt cutters. He looks at Trent and back to Ray again. No one has said a word.  
Jason arrives on the landing to the stairs and he strides along, double quick to the end of the corridor where they're waiting.

"Okay.. so what is it? We need to move if we going to make exfil. Let's wrap it up here!"

"Jace you need to see this!" Ray indicates into the room where Trent's sitting on the edge of the small bed.  
He's leaning over the figure lying on it. Checking their pulse and counting. He's nodding his head and turns to face the others, as Jason pushes past Spenser and Ray in the doorway. "Yeah she's okay" he nods, acknowledging Jason "She's just heavily sedated by the looks of things"

Jason doesn't say anything. He looks at Ray and Spenser. "Okay so what you waiting for let's get her up, we need to make that exfil" he pushes back past them in the door way.

Ray and Spenser look blankly at each other.  
"That's it? Seriously, he doesn't say a word? After all this time and the way he's been tearing his hair out and now he says nothing!" Clay's confused about Jason's reaction

It takes Jason all his control not to react when he see's her, but as leader he can't get emotional. He has to make unemotional decisions to keep everyone alive.

Clay takes the bolt cutters and cuts the handcuffs round the top of the bed post that are securing her. Clay hands this weapon to Ray before picking her up over his shoulder "Lets go!"

"HAVOC this is BRAVO 1 copy"

"BRAVO 1 COPY"

"We heading to ex fill with thr….two passengers!"

"Copy that Bravo 1"

The guys all look at each other did Jason make a mistake? They have three passengers. They are confused. He doesn't usually make a mistake like that "Jace you okay?" Ray looks at him worried.

Jason stops and looks at Ray he's thinking. "Ray, at the moment no one knows we have her, except those in this room!"

Ray looks confused "What you getting at, brother?"

"Lets keep it that way for now"

Ray has no idea what Jason is pulling but as team leader he ll go along with it. They head down the stairs.  
Sonny and Brock are at the bottom ready to go with Diego and LeRicca "Where the _HELL_ did she come from?" Sonny looks at Jason when he see's Clay carrying C.J down the stairs. Ray shakes his head.

"Let's just make that exfil, time for questions later!" Jason orders them out.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They board the helo. She's still out cold and Trent's checking on her while the other helo medic is checking Diego.  
"He's Okay... quite badly beaten and cut up but he'll be alright!"

LeRicca is on the floor of the helo he's not said a word. He's watching Trent checking her pulse. "She's fine" Trent concludes "Just, very heavily sedated, from what I can tell" he turns and looks at LeRicca "What did you give her?"

"Crazy little Biatch" LeRicca says "She Loco!"

"Shut your mouth!" Sonny says to him

Jason looks at him and grabs hold of his collar "He asked you a question .. What did you give her?"

"She loco."

Sonny laughs, shaking his head amused "Yeah well tell me something we didn't know!"

"You gave her something?"

"They... they gave her something! I don't know what! They said they needed to keep her quiet. Crazy little bitch wouldn't shut up!"

Jason looks at Trent "She gonna be okay?"

"Yeah I think so ... I'll bring her round when we get back on board"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They get loaded back on the C-17 headed back to base. Blackburn and Mandy welcome them back. Mandy's agents take care of their 'passengers'.

Blackburn turns to go when he sees Trent with Clay carrying something. He looks at Jason for an explanation "Yeah we found something!"

Blackburn tips his head and frowns and then he makes out it's C.J. "Jason you never called this in?"

"No! .. I know, I wanted to keep it to Bravo for now"

Blackburn frowns more. He's not sure he understands the Master Chiefs thinking "I'm sure you're gonna explain?"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Trent and Clay lay her on the bench at the side of the plane. It's not overly comfortable but best they can do for now. Clay folds his jacket and puts it behind her head. Trent gets his kit bag.

"I'm gonna give her a shot of adrenaline bring her round" he preps the syringe. "Watch yourself. cos she'll probably throw up!" he gets the cardboard bowl ready just in case.

Clay nods. Jason stands next to Ray. They all watch as Trent injects her slowly with the syringe.  
She suddenly takes a sharp intake of breath and sighs out and just as he said, she throws up.

"Nice!" Sonny screws his face up

"How's she doing?" Jason asks Trent. He's standing there with his arms folded waiting for an update

"Yeah she's good. Her pulse is steady. Overall she don't look too bad!" he smiles "She's certainly been worse. Just gotta let her come round"

"She'll be okay though?"

"Yeah" He laughs "She'll have a headache for a while"

She starts to blink trying to get her bearings "C.J?... _C.J,c_ an you hear me? It's Trent. Hey you okay?"

She sits up slowly and nods. She gulps as she feels sick.

"Okay, steady! Just take it slow. Do you hurt anywhere?"

She rubs her head

"Okay... that's fine. It's to be expected" he turns to the guys "Can we get her some water?"

 _"Ahhhhh!_ I feel sick!"

"You will for a while . Just take it steady"

" _Aaaahhhh_! Shit!... It's spinning, I need to lay down."

"NO!" Trent's insistent "Just sit up for a minute. I want you to come round a bit then I'll let you sleep. Promise" He looks round at Jason "Yeah she's good. She'll just need to sleep it off. It'll be like the hangover from hell for a while."

Sonny smirks to himself "Oh watching her with a hangover, that's something I will enjoy"

Ray looks at him and shake his head "Sonny sometimes I worry about you! So what now?" Ray asks Jason

"Let's just get back first. Everyone get some rest "

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They get back to base. They stretcher Diego off. He's not in good shape

"Looks like he been beaten pretty bad, but he's Mandy's to deal with now!"

Blackburn pulls Jason to one side "I'm gonna have to make a call "

"Can you not hold off?"

"Jason …. I can't not tell him! We've found his daughter for god sake and you never called it in?"

"I'm just sayin can you hold off?" Jason waits for reply "Eric, he lied about where she was. Now either he didn't know? or... perhaps he did! But either way he lied, that's all I'm saying. Let's just give it sometime. Please?" he raises his eyes "See what plays out?

"We're sitting on shifting sand here, Jason. We get this wrong this could affect all of us" Blackburn sighs "Okay! I'll hold off till she comes round, and we can speak to her. Then I'll make the call. But Jason, I will _have_ to make it."

Jason nods

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"How long she gonna be out?" Jason asks Trent

"Well she probably okay now if you want to talk to her? But ideally, she probably needs a good nights sleep. Whatever it was was they gave her, it was some pretty heavy duty stuff, by the way it's affected her"

"Okay keep me posted!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay's watching from the doorway checking on her while she sleeps. Trent's checking her pulse again. "How's she doing?"

"Yeah she's okay" Trent nods "You can see for yourself if you want?"

"Jason gone?"

"Yeah!" Trent nods, knowing why he's asking,

Clay steps over to the side of the bed. "She still looks pretty out of it?"

"Yeah like I said, a big hangover for a while!" he laughs "Look I'm gonna get drink. You wanna watch her?"

"Sure" Clay sits down on the bench by the trolley bed that she's on. He starts to fall asleep himself

"Oh Jeez!...Oh my god, my head!" she sits herself up as she opens her eyes

"Hey!... steady!... Slowly"

"Where the hell am I ?

"Back at the base"

"Shit!... How come?"

He shrugs "Do you remember how you got here or there come to it?"

She shakes her head "No it's pretty vague, and bit of a blur"

"Okay well don't worry ... it'll come back! Just relax!... You want some water?" Clay squats down and hands her the water bottle.

"Yeah!... please... _ahhh_ fuck! My head is pounding" she leans forward and rests her head on his shoulder. He puts his hand round her head and holds her. Then he realises she gone back to sleep. He gently twists her round and lays her down again.

He takes a deep sigh in. As he turns round he sees Jason standing at the door  
"How's she doing?"

"Yeah...errr mm okay... I think! I asked her but she doesn't remember anything."

Jason nods "Keep an eye on her!" he turns and leaves

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Anything?" he asks Mandy?"

"No they're not talking, either of them. They're both on these lists though. LeRicca on this one and Diego on that"

"They the same list?"

"I don't know yet. We're still trying to piece it all together. ... Has Blackburn let the Admiral know?"

Jason pauses before he answers "He will when she comes round "

"Jason, what's going on?"

"Just thinking for the moment. .. Look so far only BRAVO knows that she's alive and we have her. Just might be better for a while till we know more?"

"Jason.. be careful what games you play here!" She's concerned and shakes her head.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

As C.J wakes up she surveys the quiet room. " _Ahhhhhh!_ " she sighs as she sits round with her legs dangling off the bed. She runs her hands through her hair, before settling her palms on her temples squeezing to relieve the pressure.

She gulps as she still feels sick. Spotting the water bottle on the table she gets off the couch bed to get it.  
She leans on the table while she takes a drink as she's still unsteady on her feet. She closes her eyes again. It's too much effort to make it back to the bed so she slumps down to the floor, leaning against the table leg.

Jason opens the door. He sees her sat on the floor. "HEY! You okay?"

She shakes her head "No!...arrrghh Fuck!" she cries "Can you give me a hand up?"

"Sure" he frowns but gives her a reassuring smile as he lifts her and sits on the chair beside the couch bed."What's wrong?"

She shakes her head "I just feel so out of it... What the hell happened?" Her hands are shaking with tremors

"Okay, just take your time, you'll be fine!" She leans her head on his shoulder as he puts his hand round the back of her head and holds her. Gently kissing the top of her head. He takes a deep breath in. "You're safe okay... I've got ya!"

She starts to cry. In all the time Jason has known her, he's never heard her cry like this! He's seen her in pain and angry but never full on cry "Hey come on, it's gonna be fine!"

She takes deep breath in trying to stop the tears. "I just feel so exhausted... who did this?" Her face is wet with tears.

He wipes her face with his hand gently "I don't know! But,come on, you're fine! I got you. I told you hundred percent, always"

She closes her eyes the pressure in her head from the sobbing it's blinding.

"C.J, come on... please stop!.. This is not you!" She shakes her head and tips it back. He firmly gets hold of the back of her head till she's looking at him. "Come on...focus!" he shakes her head gently.

Then they kiss. They kiss like they never kissed before. He's trying to take all her hurt away. He puts his hand under her T shirt touching her skin, running his hand gently across her side and stomach, feeling the warmth of her skin on his hand.

Davis who had just walked in but realising what she's disturbed she backs up, gives a cough as she knocks on the door. She gives another cough "err mmm... Jason! Commander Blackburn wants to see you!"

"Okay, tell him I'll be right there"

Davis watches Jason holding her in his arms. She shakes her head. After everything Sonny put on the line. He's right, like a bad penny she still somehow turns up here, and straight away Jason falls for it.  
She strides down the corridor still shaking her head. "Sonny's not gonna be happy!"


	14. Chapter 14

**"That was stupid Clay! ...So stupid"**

Clay's sitting on the seat in his cage. After changing his pants he's still shirtless while he searched in his bag for a clean tee shirt, which he's now holding in his hand but didn't get as far as putting it over his head.

He sits just blankly staring into space unable to stop thinking about what's happened. _But she's okay!_ he sighs as he reassures himself of the fact.

He's still trying to work out how he feels, because part of him knows he has to let her go. _But oh my God, I still want her so much!_  
He aches for her. Every part of him wants her so badly. He just wanted to wrap her in his arms and take her right there where he saw her. Even the thought of being with her turns him on,

"Hey Blondie, whatcha doin'?" Sonny walks in, he's just showered so he's drying himself as he stands and watches Clay sitting there deep in thought "What's wrong?"

"Nothing" he says unconvincingly

"Nothing? Oh okay. Well keep it that way" Sonny doesn't need to take many guesses to know what's wrong, he can just tell what he's thinking about, what he hasn't stopped thinking about.

Ray walks in and looks at them both "Right we have de brief in thirty minutes, so if you want something to eat, get it now."

"No, I'm good" Clay can't even think about eating as he starts putting his T shirt on.

"What's up with him?" Ray looks questioning Sonny

"Oh, can't you guess?"

Ray pulls as face pursing his lips, turning his back and whispering, "What the hell are we gonna do with him?"

"God knows. I fixed this damn problem once. You know, she's like some damn supernatural, disappears only to just turn up again when you don't expect it" he shakes his head. "God dammit Ray, this shit has gotta stop"  
Sonny looks, staring hard at Ray "You know what I'm taking him out" he nods towards Clay "I'll pour tequila down his throat if I have to, get him one of them little booths, some lappers, some sex and that should fix him up right there. He might see it for what it is then. Alternative is, I actually knock some sense into him"

 _Hmmmm!_ Ray frowns. "I'm not convinced it's as easy as that, but you can try I guess"

Jason bursts in he is lot more upbeat "Okay, so I need some food, I'm starving. You want anything? Sonny... Ray?" He looks at Clay "Hey Golden Boy, what's up with you? "

Clay shakes his head "Nothing, I'm just tired"

" _Tired?_ You hear this, the kid's tired." he smiles " Okay, well go get some rest then you won't be _tired_!"

Ray sighs and shakes his head, sometimes he really could punch Jason. He's gotta know the kid's hurting _AND_ Jason knows the reason why. If he's not careful this is all gonna get out of hand again.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

" _JASON!_ ...A word!" Blackburn points to his office

"Sir was just going to …."

"NOW!" he ushers Jason in "Look..." he closes the door "I can't hold off much longer from this call. Word will be getting out"

Jason thinks, he needs to buy more time "I'll take her off the base."

"Off the base? " Blackburn frowns apprehensively " Where the hell to? Jason, if this blows up in our faces then...then fall out, well I don't wanna even think about it. It'll be over for me and you!"

Jason folds his arms to think "I'll take her to my place"

"Jason you can't have her at yours. Jesus Christ, if anyone finds out and we haven't reported we've got her. Seriously stop and think this through. No, I can't allow you to do this. I need to call it in"

"Who? Who's gonna report this Eric?" Jason leans on the commanders' desk "He hasn't even reported her missing!"

Blackburn thinks. Jason has a point and after talking things through with Mandy, Blackburn has his concerns too. "Okay!" Blackburn nods "But if anyone starts asking questions, then I make the call. Are we agreed?"

Jason nods

"Oh, and Jason, do us all a favor and keep this, and her, low key need to know for now"

"Yeah sure. I won't let her out of my sight" Jason smiles as he leaves the room. He takes out his cell and makes a call as he walks "Mom I need you to do me a favor.." He sighs "No, no you're not gonna like it, but I got no choice. I need you to take Mikey and Emma back home to yours for a week or so. Can you do that?"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Hey!" Jason smiles at her "How you doin' now? You good."

"Yeah" she smiles back and nods her head "Yeah I'm feel better. My head feels like it's made of lead, but otherwise I'm good. Trent said that should wear off slowly."

"Can you remember anything? Do you know how long you'd been there?"

"No, not much." She sighs "It's all still so vague and patchy. I can't piece it all together right now."

"Okay, well don't worry, hopefully it will come back" he pauses "Look, I need to speak to Mandy, but then we're getting out of her here, I'm taking you back to my place"

She frowns "Jason I can't go to yours. What about your kids, your mother!" she rolls her eyes at the thought of Linda.

"It's okay, I've fixed that. I have to get your off the base, people are asking too many questions. We need to keep a low profile for a few days, till we work out what's been going on. Plus, you need some time, to rest up and you can't do that here."

She's confused by what he's saying, not sure why she needs to go to his, or be low profile. Seeing her confusion, he kisses her head "I'll be back soon. Then I'll explain everything"

She's tired and all she can do to respond is nod with reluctant agreement.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay see's Jason stride down the corridor and so he puts his head around the door of the room CJs in. She's sitting there on the makeshift bed and seeing him she smiles, beckoning him in.

He closes the door behind him. "You good?"

She nods

"Gave us a bit of a scare"

She smiles "Well, you know me"

He smiles back, deep in thought as he sits on the bed beside her, turning to looks at her, watching as she rubs her head. "Still hurt?"

"Yeah!" she sighs "Must have been some party and worst thing is I don't even remember it!" she laughs

He smiles as he puts his arm round the curve of her waist and pulls her to his side to comfort her _Mmmm!_ the touch of her against him, he likes it. She leans her head on his shoulder and they just sit there in the quiet. Eventually it's her that breaks the silence "Did you know Jason's taking me home, to his?"

Clay nods "Yeah he said, you good with that?"

She sighs and nods. "Just somewhere to sleep will do me. I'm so god damn tired." She's still leaning on his shoulder and closes her eyes. Her arm goes around his waist to hold him. She loves the close comforting feeling of holding someone close.

He smiles and nods to himself as he closes his eyes. He's imagining him and her being together right now. He imagines laying her down on this bed and kissing her. Kissing her all over. Kissing away her pain, then undressing her and making love to her right here right now on this bed, it plays out in his head because he can't stop thinking about it, about her and him.

 _Mmmm!_ she sighs _This is nice_. Sitting here just holding in the peace and quiet. She closes her eyes as he looks down at her, she can sense it, him watching her and she opens them again. He can't help it and he knows he shouldn't, but suddenly his lips reach out for hers as he leans in and kisses her.

She doesn't reject him, not immediately, but then as she comes to her senses she does. She decides it's wrong, that they can't "Clay don't! I'm sorry, we can't do this, you know we can't!. she regretfully sighs. He knows she's right, they shouldn't, they can't.

The handle on the door clicks as it opens and Trent walks in. "Oh!... Oh good, you're awake!" he senses something's going on but he's not sure what. "Jason said he's taking you to his place. So, I just came to see how you're doing now?" he looks back and forward between them both.

Clay sits bolt upright. She adjusts herself and coughs. "Yeah I was just checking on her too. I'll get off. I've got a de-brief" Clay smiles as he leaves. She awkwardly smiles back.

"Okay. Clay, tell them I'll be there, five minutes. I just wanna check how she is first. So, how's the head now, feeling better yet?"

She nods "I'm okay. To be honest I just wanna lay down and go to sleep really."

Clay closes the door. He's silent as he stands in the corridor taking a moment to reflect. He rubs his hands through his hair. _Oh SHIT!_ he sighs as he squats down against the wall, thinking

"What the Hell!" He sighs berating himself for what he just did "That was stupid Clay. So stupid _"_


	15. Chapter 15

**Drink just makes her get stupid**

She takes a deep breath and nervously swallows, as Jason opens the door to his house.

"This feels kinda weird! It's quiet. Where is everyone?"

"I got my mom to take the kids to hers, for a break, just for a week or so, just while... well just while the dust settles here." she nods and smiles at him as he leads her into the living room "Come on, I'll get us some coffee."

She lets out another deep long sigh and smiles again "At least it'll be just you and me. I can't be dealing with other people right now" She takes a good look around the room. _Nothing's changed since I was here_. And then slumps herself down on the couch.

She's tired and shuts her eyes for a moment, running her hand through her hair. It feels awful and greasy and she opens her eyes again taking a good look down her body, at herself. Her jeans, hands and arms are filthy with dirt. "You know, I really need a shower and um... some clean clothes" she sighs "These feel like I've been stuck in them a lifetime"

"Yeah!" he smiles "You know that might be a good idea!" He kisses the top of her head "Tell you what, you grab a shower, I'll speak to Davis, get her to sort you some clothes"

"Yeah, that would be good. Jason... " she smiles "Thanks!"

o-o-o-o-o-o

The water from the shower is great and she stands with her head under the spray letting it run down her back. The warmth from the water is taking the pressure off the throbbing in her head.

"Hey CJ ! So, I'm just going to meet Davis. She's sorting the clothes and things for you. I won't be long. I'll grab us some food and bits while I'm gone" she can hear Jason shout to her through the door

"Okay!" she shouts in reply over the noise of the shower _Ahhh!_ she holds her head, rubbing it. Shouting wasn't such a good idea it's made her head hurt again. She steps back full under the warmth of the water and closes her eyes and now she's thinking about Clay and that kiss he gave her. Maybe she should have made it clearer that nothing was going to happen anymore. Why didn't she?

She can't remember how long she's been in the shower, but her senses come back and she turns off the water. Stepping out, grabbing the towel on the rail, she starts to dry herself.

Then with the towel wrapped around her body, she steps back out into the daylight of the living room. _Hmmm! Looks like Jason's not back yet._

She walks through the quiet of the house to the bedroom and opens the door. It flashes back in her head to the last time she was here, that was the day she left after her showdown with Sonny _I should never have gone!_ She shakes her head trying to banish those irrelevant thoughts.

After drying herself fully, she wraps the towel tighter around her chest, tucking it in making it into a dress. She looks in the mirror and sighs _Oh, C.J! What the fucks going on with you?_

She slides the closet door open and puts her hands-on Jason's clothes. Running her fingers along his T-shirts before she slides one of his shirts off the hanger and puts it on. She does a few of the buttons up. It's huge on her, more like a dress, but it will do for now and just as she comes out of the bedroom Jason walks back through the door.

"Hey!" he smiles " You look much better"

"Yeah, I feel better too"

"Are you hungry? I got you some fried chicken. Your favorite"

"You remembered" She smiles. She hadn't thought about food in a while, but the sick feeling has worn off "Some food might be good idea."

He opens one beer and takes a swig. She looks at him drinking it. "Ah, ah! Sorry, Trent said no!"

She nods. "It's okay, I don't want one anyway."

"You okay?" He watches her standing there wearing his shirt, looking her up and down, his first thought are how great she looks, how sexy in his shirt "Looks good on you, my shirt." he smiles,

She can tell what he's thinking "Only one problem..." she smiles back " I have no panties!" she flirts with him flashing back the bottom of the shirt so he can see how naked she is underneath the blue cotton shirt.

He smiles while drinking his beer "Lisa did you a bag with some clothes, I'm sure there's some panties in there. When you need them!"

This all feels so awkward being in his house. He puts down his beer and stands in front on her, putting his hand on her cheek and she looks up staring at him and smiles. He leans in over her and puts his lips gently to hers, kissing her. She's not quite sure what to do. Her head is saying slow down, her heart is saying just go with it but the more he kisses her the more she goes with her heart as she starts kissing him back.

It gets frenzied, very quickly and she's grappling at his belt and pants. She needs him and he pulls his T-shirt over his head and throws it down on the floor. Next thing they're both on the rug in the living room and he's on top of her and all she can feel is his strength pushing down against her. It's been so long since it's been like this, forgetting the incident in the shower room, and now all she knows is she wants him so much. She needs him, he makes her feel good and so wrapping her legs around him she embraces his body on hers.

 _"Oh God...Jason!"_ she's breathless.

This is how it use to feel. This is what they were like, this is why they wanted each other so much all the time. He's kissing her all over and she just doesn't want it to stop. He's pushing against her, thrusting his weight causing a friction between them. He's working on getting her fully aroused and she's claws at his back pulling him deeper and deeper inside her. Then the point comes, and she reaches a peak and just can't hold back. "Oh godddd! Yes!" she cries out, screaming his name under her breath. "Jason!"

Eventually their bodies relax, and he lets out a sigh. _"Ahhh jeez!_ Oh CJ ...Jesus. I missed you so much! _Ahhh!"_ he lets out a deep sigh as he fills her with all of his passion, exploding with his desire for her "Shit! God I'm sorry!" He smiles as he relaxes

"It's fine!" she smiles, kissing him "Nothing to be sorry about. It was good for me!"

She smiles again this time running her fingers through his hair, then along his strong arms and down his back "Come here!" she kisses him, holding him, wanting him. Her Jason in her arms again.

They lay there just looking each other for a few moments, content. Then he rolls on his back and she lays on her front with her chin on his chest just smiling, fully satisfied and for the first time in a while feeling safe. Content. Happy and safe.

She lets out a sigh "Well, guess that was better than fried chicken!" she laughs.

He kisses her "Sure was, you know, I'd forgotten just how good we were together!" He smiles and starts kissing her again as they continue to lay there, on the rug, just holding each other. She feels so safe in his arms that she closes her eyes and relaxes.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

All afternoon they've been with each other. Making love on and off when they feel the need come over them. It's like old times, on the couch, on the floor, on the kitchen worktop. Reminding themselves how it use to be, how much they've missed for so long.

It's now getting dark and she gets up off the couch to get a glass of water. Jason's still drinking beer. The half empty bottle from earlier is still in the kitchen by the sink "Hey, you want another beer?" she calls out

"Yeah sure!"

She picks up the half open one to pour it away but just before it all goes, she takes a sniff of the smell. She savors the beer smell, closing her eyes as she takes it in. She swallows trying so hard to ignore that smell but it keeps calling her, she knows she wants it so much. but she does her best and she ignores it, tipping the rest away and putting the empty bottle in the trash.

He's at the kitchen doorway "You okay?" he frowns watching her

"Sure, just a bit tired"

He takes her hand "You know what, forget the beer" he leads her towards the bedroom "I've got a better idea"

"Oh really. Again already!" she smiles as he starts kissing her. She jumps up wrapping her legs around him kissing into his neck as he carries her through to the bed.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They lay there in the darkness, his arm around her and her head on his shoulder. She doesn't want to break the silence but she finally does as she has questions she wants to ask

"When you said you needed to get me off the base yesterday, you said we needed to keep low profile, what did you mean?"

"I'm not sure really. I mean I don't know what's going on yet. I'm still trying figure some stuff out, like what happened to you" He pauses "Mandy's working on it her end, we just need some time. I just thought it might be best if you keep your head down for a while. Keep you safe."

She's deep in thought trying to piece together everything, her memory's so blurred and broken.

"Do you remember anything, anything at all about what happened?"

She's not really listening "When you say low profile, did you let my father know? That I'm here I mean"

"No! No, not yet! Just for the time being, I think it's best he doesn't know, that no one knows"

She shakes her head trying to comprehend what he's saying "Why? Why wouldn't you tell him?"

"C.J, he lied to me. I went to see him. He um... he told me you were in rehab and I'm not sure why he said that."

She lays quiet thinking carefully "He told you that? " she frowns, looking at him.

"I went to see if he knew where you were, to see if you were okay, but for some reason that's what he told me. I don't know why."

There's a silence for a few minutes while she thinks what to say, "He didn't lie!"

Jason looks at her, just about able to make her face out in the darkness of the room. She swallows hard, she hates saying what she's about to as it makes her sound weak. Something she's always tried so hard not to be

"I was .." she shakes her head "I hate this" her lip quivers "Even the idea of it" she sighs "the fact I couldn't handle things. That I wasn't in control." she looks him in the eyes "I so wasn't in control and so he did! He sent me to Rehab, he didn't lie to you."

Jason frowns at her.

"Oh, don't look at me like that" she takes a breath, pausing "Look things happened, you know me" she laughs " I was a mess and it just all got out of control!" She pauses again "You know I was in such bad pain, the injuries. I was drinking to dull the ache, as well as shut stuff out. I couldn't stop thinking about you and about...Clay. What happened and it... it um...well it all just got out of my control. I couldn't stop!"

She's thinking back to when it all started "My parents.." she laughs "Well they couldn't handle me the end. Jason I was totally out of control, I was lost" She laughs to herself "Even my Father couldn't fix it. ' _Catherine it's everything in excess with you! There's always some sort of trouble'_." she laughs again mocking her Father's voice

"Then well,...then when he put my Navy discharge through " She chokes back tears. "I totally lost it. I couldn't forgive him for that" She shakes her head "Jason he knew that was my life, my everything and he took that away. He punished me for getting in such a mess. And that was it, I just spiraled further out of control."

Jason's thinking now as this information blows everything he thought out of the water "So, what...you really were in rehab? But that doesn't make any sense. So, you weren't at the house when your mother... " He trails off trying to put this together

"When my mother? When my Mother what?" she looks up at him in the dark "Jason, when my mother, has something happened to my mother? Jason. Tell me what's happened?"

He goes quiet "Shit!" as he remembers that she doesn't know yet

"Jason you're worrying me, tell me"

He sits up and puts the light on "C.J...what's the last thing you remember?"

She frowns, shrugging her shoulders "I don't know I can't remember "

"Think! C.J, think. What can you remember?"

"Um...being in my room, at the clinic. We'd had a group session God I hated those! Um... I was tired I left early. I was angry. I went to my room Oh um...one of the Doctors came, gave me an injection, something to help me sleep and then... then nothing, not until yesterday really"

She shakes her head trying to make sense "Bits keep flashing in my head but nothing I can make sense of. I remember screaming and scratching someone. But there's nothing else. Jason did something happen?" she frowns "Jason what happened?" she sits up "Shit! Why can't I remember anything?" she starts to cry.

"It's alright. CJ it's alright, just calm down. You're safe now. I'm gonna sort it out!" He kisses the top of her head trying to reassure here but he's thinking again. So, if he didn't lie ... He's frowning now trying to work it all out.

Then a sound interrupts them the **BLEEP! BLEEP! ...BLEEP! BLEEP!*** of Jason's phone.

"Shit!" he looks at it and sighs "Look I've gotta go. We're being spun up again" he sits up on the edge of the bed

"Jason, please tell me what's going on?"

Don't worry. You're safe now, we'll talk when I get back!" She looks at him for explanation as he flashes his phone screen at her to show her the message. "Look, you know how it is. I'm sorry okay! Seriously, I'll speak to Mandy and I'll get some answers as soon as I'm back."

He starts to get dressed. He kisses her "Stay here in the house. Don't go out! There's takeout menus in the drawer. Don't call anyone. Don't speak to anyone." He looks her in the eyes "C.J are you listening?" He pushes home the message as he knows what she's like for not doing as she's told "Just until I get back!" he kisses her again.

"Sure, fine, whatever you say." she's confused but she says she'll do what he asks

He kisses her. "C.J, please, just do as you're told for once."

She laughs "Yes Sir! Master Chief, Sir!" She rolls her eyes "Hey, don't you dare have too much fun without me."

"Impossible!" he says as he kisses her and leaves.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

 **She wakes, its 09:00hr**

She lets out a large sigh _Guess he's not going be back for a while yet today. If at all!_ She gets up and slips the T-shirt on that he left on the bed when he got changed to leave and then she wanders through the quiet of the house looking in each room.

She uses the bathroom and has another shower, then wrapped in a towel she grabs the go bag Lisa sorted for her. Everything she could possibly need in all the right sizes _Wow! I'm impressed. That girls good._

Navy issue beige combats. _Oh nice!_ she smiles, putting them on feels good. She didn't imagine wearing them anymore. White vest top and zip hoodie. She frowns at the panties _These are definitely standard NAVY issue_ as she holds them up to look. Toothbrush and other girlie toiletries she might need _That's better._

She wanders around the house some more, looking in the kid's bedrooms, looking at things in the drawers. Then feeling the boredom start to kick in she decides to get something to eat. She makes a sandwich. As she puts the peanut butter back in the fridge, she looks at the beers all sitting there lined up in rows.

She closes her eyes and shuts the fridge door, trying to ignore them. Grabs a bowl and a bag of chips and is about to go back the couch to watch the TV when she gets distracted by the fridge, calling her again. She bites her lip. _Oh, what the hell. One won't hurt. I mean after everything. One beer is the least I deserve_

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

It's early evening now and she's watched loads of shit movies. Fell asleep a few times and is now flicking the channels again. _Oh god this is boring! S_ he wonders _How the guys are. Where they are? What they're doing? It's gotta be more interesting than this!_

She moves the chip bowl that's resting on her stomach and as she leans to the table the bowl falls over. "Shit!" the remnants of the chips fall out and cover the floor.

She sits herself up. Her heads still fuzzy. She thought she was feeling better but looks like the thick head has come back. And as she puts the TV remote down, she pushes aside all the empty beer bottles.

"Oh Shit!" she frowns as looks at the table there must be a least six or seven empty bottles there now. She rubs her head. "Damn .. I don't remember drinking all these" She runs her hands through her hair and rubs her forehead. Having been off the drink for a while it's hit her more than she thought it would.

She cleans up and is now standing in the doorway to the kitchen. She takes a deep sigh "Oh what the hell!" they're not gonna be back yet for a while." She grabs her zip hoodie, the spare house keys and puts her shoes on. "I'll grab a cab down the street"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She stands outside the bar thinking. _Okay, this can't hurt?! Couple of drinks, some music, back to Jason's, sleep it off, start again tomorrow. It'll be fine!_ _  
_  
She's not sure who she's kidding with this plan, but she still goes ahead and does it.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The music's loud, in the bar, and she orders a beer. Sitting herself on a stool at the corner of the counter. "If I order one more then that will be it!" She has this plan in her head about controlling her drinking.

She's getting more into the music now, her head nodding along to the beat. She notices a guy who keeps watching her and smiling as she looks up. She tries to ignore him but as she finishes the second of her beers he comes over to join her.

"Hi there, I'm Matt. You want another beer?" he smiles.

She looks at him and smiles back. She thinks about it. "I really shouldn't but then..." _Oh, what's the harm it's still early?_ "..okay, sure. Don't mind if I do. I'll have another beer and um...I'll have a whiskey chaser as well." she laughs, smiling at him.

"Oh, my kinda girl!" He looks at the bartender "Make that two!"

They sit chatting not really saying much, just general chit chat about nothing. She's gotten used to saying nothing serious and avoiding questions after spending so long doing what she did in her career.

"You wanna dance?" he says seeing her tapping along to the music, the four whiskeys she's had now making her much more relaxed.

"Sure, why the hell not." she smiles, stumbling as she gets up from the stool "Shit!"

"Whoa! Steady there!" he smiles

Her head's spinning quite a bit now "Christ! I didn't realize I'd had quite so much to drink."

He laughs "You're fine! C'mon." He holds her in his arms propping her up as they dance "You want another beer, or maybe another whiskey?"

"Anyone would think you were trying to get me drunk?" she laughs "But, what the hell. Sure, why not!"

"That's my girl!"

She stands by the wall, mainly because it's about the only thing keeping her upright while he goes the bar, then he brings back another large Whiskey "Cheers"

He stands her drink on top of the jukebox and she awkwardly smiles as he leans in pushing her against the wall and tries to kiss her. She turns her head and he kisses her neck "Hmm! You know what, I'm not sure this is such a good idea." She realises, she's not up for where this is now going "I'm sorry, I think I've had too much to drink" she tries to laugh it off pushing him back.

He hands her the whiskey glass "Never!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Davis, Sonny and Ray walk up to the bar they're still laughing about the mission. Sonny orders the beers and the others find a table and sit down. They've not long got back and figure a late one before bed will help them unwind.

"Where's Jason and Spenser?" Davis asks

"Jason went to get his arm looked at the medical. Guess he'll be a while" Ray says "It's nothing too much just a deep cut. Guess it'll need a couple of stitches though." Ray takes a mouthful of his beer "And Spenser he was still in the shower!" he rolls his eyes "So I guess he'll be along any minute now"

Sonny's laughing "That guys face when we turned up!" thinking about something on the operation they just got back from. Ray laughs as well.

Davis is sipping her beer watching the other people in the bar, but she's more interested in looking at Sonny. She keeps smiling every time he catches her eye. She's so glad it was quick, and he's back. As she takes another swig of her beer the clatter of bottles falling over near the jukebox makes her look over. As she does, she stops drinking and starts frowning.

She stops what she's doing and watches the couple by the wall at the back. The guy looks like he trying to kiss and put his hands on a woman who doesn't seem too interested as she keeps pushing him back. Davis keeps watching "OH... MY ...GOD!" she says while she keeps watching them

"Oh my god what?" Ray looks around to see what she's focusing on "Oh SHIT!"

Sonny looks up from under his hat at them both "Now what?" He turns around in his seat "Oh God dammit!" He swigs his beer back "Holy mother of god!" he shakes his head as he goes to get up "That fuckin' woman, I swear to god, I'll kill her."

Ray pushes Sonny back into his seat "Stay! I'll sort it. I don't want you going off on one, not tonight!"

Davis looks at Sonny she takes a big sigh. Sonny drinks his beer and pulls his hat down shaking his head. Davis knows what he's thinking.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Hey C.J!" Ray smiles as he gets her attention "So, what's happening here?"

"RAY!... Oh MY GOD!...You're back!"

The guy leaning against her looks round "You know this dude?"

"Yeah sure! I work...sorry, I use work, well I didn't work with, but... " she confusing herself let alone Matt "... with him" she giggles and whispers "I did have sex with him once though!" she laughs

Ray tries not bite "C.J shut up!" Ray measures his response "So, then what's going on? What are you doing here, I thought Jason told you to stay at the house?"

"Going on?" she repeats "I don't know Ray, what's going on? Ooop! Nothing, nope, nothing's going on! Is it? Oh, don't look like that, I was bored! Oh, by the way this is umm... this is... sorry what was your name?"

"Matt!"

"This is Matt! But Matt's just leaving!"

He laughs "Hey no I'm not leaving. I thought we were... you know?" he run his hands over waist and up to her breast "Going back to my place!" He looks at Ray "Look, buddy everything's fine! _We_ were just leaving, right CJ?"

"No! See you're leaving, she's not!"

"Really, and you gonna make me?"

Ray doesn't say anything. Matt's trying to get the measure of him and what he might do "Look man, you know how it is, she's been offering it up all night. So, I'm gonna, you know, take advantage!" he laughs "So why don't you go back to your table and let me get on with getting laid. Come on its not like she's not up for it, right?"

Ray gets a strong hold on her arm "C.J, come on, come with me!"

"Hey buddy get your hands off her"

Ray stays calm and measured "Now listen here... _MATT!_ I'm gonna say this once, but you need to leave because you sure as hell are getting into something you really don't need to be!" Ray looks at him raising his eyes and nodding.

Matt looks up and back to the table where Ray has come from. He can see Sonny standing up looking at them and Spenser who has just turned up. He slams his beer down on the table " _FINE!_ "He looks at C.J "She's only a drunk tramp anyway." he turns and sneers at her "Look at you whoring yourself out for a drink, what then get your buddy to step in before you have to pay up? You know what, you're welcome to her!"

She's taken aback by the comments but shakes her head and picks up her drink. Ray takes it out of her hand and gets hold of her wrist "I said _come on!_ " He pulls at her "We need to get you home."

"Oh Ray..." she puts her arms round his neck "...you wanna take me home? There's an offer" she smiles "But haven't we been there once before" she laughs "That didn't end so well!"

Ray pulls her arms off his neck "C.J will you keep your voice down!" He glares at her as he looks around to check no one heard "I need to get you home. You're drunk! What the hell's Jason gonna say?"

She puts her hands on his face and looks him in the eyes "You wanna do it again, like before? It was good wasn't it! Me and you it was good!" she looks him in the eyes and attempts to kiss him

"C.J will you stop it! You're making a fool of yourself." he's getting angry with her now

"What, don't wanna fuck me again? Come on, you do. It can be another little secret."

"Jeez! How the hell much have you had to drink?" Ray's pulling away from her arms now. He's panicking about what she's coming out with and the fact she doesn't care who's in earshot

"There a problem?" Clay's now standing beside them

She tries to focus " _Ahhh!_ Clay. Now... _he_ will take me home!" she smiles. She's all over the place and can't stand properly without help. She now throws her arms round Spenser

"C.J stop ...you're drunk!"

"I AM! No, no I'm not allowed to drink.! I'm fine... just leave me alone!" she pushes him back

"Shit she's a mess!" Ray rubs his head not sure what to do with her "We need to get Jason" he picks up his phone

"NO!" she knocks the phone out of Ray's hand before he connects "Don't you dare get him!" she angrily frowns

"GOD DAMMIT!... Fuck, that woman!" Finally, Sonny's had enough. He slams his beer bottle on the table as he stands up and goes over to where they are. He forcefully pulls her off Clay's neck

"Uh OH! Sonny, oh my god am I in trouble now!" she laughs "Don't tell me off or... or are you gonna threaten me again? Threaten to tell my secrets." she laughs

"Shut your mouth!"

She looks at him and tries to focus "Seriously?" she keeps laughing "I'm not sacred of you, Sonny!"

"I said SHUT YOUR fuckin mouth or I'll make you! I'm not messing around with you now!" He's in her face and even in her current state she realises she's pushed his buttons too far.

"Sonny steady man, she doesn't know what she's sayin!" Ray's concerned as well

Sonny takes a deep breath to calm himself. "You know what I'm tempted to just knock her out and shut her up!"

"Sonny, man, just calm down" Clay frowns

Finally, calmer he knows Clay's right he needs to stay calm around her "Fine! Let's do it this way then!" He forces her around so he's standing over her then grabs her by both wrists in one hand and frog marches her out of the bar.

She's struggling as he marches her forward, calling him names and screaming abuse. That's the downside of her being so bloody strong it requires effort to get control of her. When they get outside he literally chucks her down on the ground. He lifts his hat and rubs his head  
"Jesus Christ!... What the hell's the matter with you woman?" He's so angry and frustrated he can hardly speak.

"How the hell did she get in this state?" Clay looks at Ray who shrugs. They all look at each other as she sits on the ground with her head in her hands.

"Ray, did you get hold of Jason?" Davis asks

"I can't get hold of him; his phone went to voice mail!"

"Okay, look I'll take her back to mine" Clay offers

"NO! No, you sure as hell won't! Jason's gonna be pissed enough as it is, so that's the last thing that's going to happen!" Sonny snaps

"Well what _are_ we gonna do with her?" Ray frowns

"I'm not going anywhere. I'm getting another drink!" she starts to stand up

" _YOU_ are not doing anything!" Sonny shoves her against the wall, and she crashes down "Sit your dumb ass down, before I put you down for good! I've had as much of your shit as I can take"

"Sonny steady!" Lisa can see how mad he is, and she knows why "Shoving her about in this state is not going to help anyone."

Sonny tries to think what to do. He rubs his head and sighs "Okay! Here's what we do, we take to yours!" he looks at Lisa

"MINE?"

"Yeah, she can sleep it off there. She can't do no more damage and we can keep an eye on her till Jason gets back." Sonny looks at Lisa and she nods "Ray you go home. It's not doing any good you being here now"

"You sure?"

"Yeah sure. Davis and me, we'll deal with her"

Clay tries to argue "I still think she'd be better at mine. She can sleep it off till the morning. It would save you going to Davis's"

"You know what ... I'm about ready to lose my shit with someone here. I told ya Blondie this this is not happenin' Do.. you. Understand me?" Sonny's up in Clay's face "You go home, and you get her out of your head, right now. Are we clear?"

Clay's struggling with this lecture mode of Sonny's

"Jesus Christ look at her Clay! This...this is what she is." he points "A total fucking mess! You want her to drag you down too? Cos if you don't stop this obsession with her..." Sonny takes a deep sigh for a moment "... that's what's gonna happen! You're gonna lose everything you worked for." He sighs "Look ...look at her, laying it on a plate for anyone. She's not got a fuckin' clue what she's doin "  
He pauses and recomposes himself "Clay, just go home and jerk off! Do something, but this this is not happening anymore. Understand?!"

Clay doesn't like the way Sonny's speaking to him "I'm not a child Sonny. I don't need protecting from her"

"Oh, but you do. You can't see her for what she is. Jesus, so help me god!" Sonny steps forward in Clay's face raising his fist then thinks better of it.

CJ uses the wall, she's slumped against, to help get herself up "Clay...Clay, just take me home!" she whines in a drunken voice, taking hold of Clay's hand.

Ray pulls her off and Sonny stands between them "So, help me god Clay, don't be getting in my face. And you..." he turns on CJ "...sit your ass the fuck down!" Once again he pushes her back onto the ground

Ray holds Clay back as he tries to calm the situation down "Sonny calm down, man" Ray rubs his head "This is getting out of control, we all need to just calm down!"

"Go _HOME_! I'm telling you now, she's going to Lisa's till she sobers up, end of!"

Ray puts his hand on Clay's shoulder, leading him away "Look come on man, let's go. We're not doing any good here! Sonny's right, she needs to sober up." he tries to appeal to Clay's sensible nature "Let's just go! Come on brother, come with me."

"Fine!.. Alright have it your way."

Sonny takes a moment and looks at Lisa " _Fuck!"_ he screams. Lisa gulps she really thinks Sonny's gonna lose it soon. Then they look at each other as they hear the sounds of crying.  
They turn around to see CJ sitting on the ground pathetically sobbing her eyes out.

"Oh Jesus Christ!" Sonny takes a deep breath and closes his eyes at the noise she's making. He laughs, rubbing his head, as Lisa smiles at him . He shakes his head at how pathetic she looks now "She's a fuckin' mess!" he's so frustrated with he but all he can do is laugh "Right time to go Cinderella!" He picks her up, throwing her over his shoulder.

Lisa brings her car around to the front of the bar and Sonny throws her, unceremoniously into the back seat. Lisa grimaces when you say throw he really does, he wasn't gentle.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

He still has her over his shoulder as they enters into Lisa's apartment. Though she has stopped wailing now as thankfully, she's passed out.

He throws her down on the couch with a thud. "Steady" Lisa frowns as she hits her head on the arm

"She needs help and I mean serious fuckin help!" Sonny looks up, he's still fuming " I don't know what the fuck Jason's gonna do with her, but he needs to god damn sort this mess is how she messes with his head, then he don't think straight." he shakes his head "Jeez... I need a beer!"

Lisa covers her over with the throw from the couch. "Well, she's definitely out of it now" She turns her on her side "Just in-case she's sick. Hey, c'mon, I've got beers in the fridge"

They walk through to the kitchen and she gets some out of the refridgerator passing one to Sonny. He lifts his hat and rubs his head before necking the beer back as Lisa watches him. He gets angry again "Jeez, God Dammit!"  
He's fuming as he swipes at the two empty glasses that were drying on the drainer, throwing them with a crash to the floor. "Shit! Sorry! Lisa, I'm sorry, she just...well she gets to me. Look,I'll clean it up."

He starts to pick up the broken glass but Lisa puts her hand on his hand "Leave it! It's fine for now" She puts her hand on his cheek "Sonny, seriously it's fine...just leave it."

He nods."Jeez! I told ya before, she gets drink inside and she gets stupid" he shakes his head "What the hell was Jason thinking leaving her alone?"

"I don't think he had a lot of choices." Lisa checks around the kitchen door frame "It's okay she's asleep now. Let's just deal with her tomorrow."

She grabs his cheeks with her hands and focus's his eyes on hers and kisses him. "Come here Cowboy" she smiles

He smiles and starts kissing her as he lifts her up and sits her on the kitchen countertop so she's level with him. She sits staring at him and they start kissing again.

 _o-o-o-o-o-o-o_

C.J comes around on the couch. "Oh god! I need water" Her mouth is so dry and she looks around the room "Where the hell am I?"

She can't see anyone so staggers to her feet and heads to what looks like the kitchen. As she gets to the doorway she stops. She shakes her head and lets out a quiet sigh.  
 _Well, well!_ _She smiles as she stands, silently, watching them kiss. What's going on here then Sonny Quinn?_


	16. Chapter 16

S **tay away from her**

Without as much as a word to them C.J quietly heads back to the couch. She smiles to herself _Well, well! Sonny Quinn getting it on with Petty Officer Davis!_ She settles herself back, closing her eyes, ready to sleep _Interesting the things you find out!_ _  
_  
She keeps smiling, thinking about what she's just seen, but it's not long before she falls once again into a drunken sleep.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Sonny sneaks out in the early hours.

"You better go. Last thing we need is her catching you here." Lisa checks the couch just making sure that CJ's is in fact still asleep, before she reaches up for one more goodbye kiss "See you soon Cowboy"

"Yeah see you later Rodeo Girl"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Jason lets himself into the house.  
He frowns and rubs his arm which is sore from the stitches. It wasn't a bad cut just deep. The stitches were just to keep it closed until it healed.

 _It's dark in here._ he frowns "C.J... " he calls out "CJ, you still awake?" He looks around and checks all the bedrooms. _Hmmm! Strange, no sign of her, where the hell's she gone?_ __

He puts the lights on and goes into the kitchen. Looking around he sees all the empty beer bottles on the counter. _"_ Oh Christ!" He looks around again "CJ!?...Where the hell are you?" He goes back through the bedrooms to double check "Oh hell! Why couldn't she just stay put like she was told"

He sees the missed call on his phone and calls Ray back.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

It's early and there's a loud continuous knock on the door. _BANG! BANG! BANG!_ The sounds thud through Lisa's apartment.

C.J rubs her head "Oh god!" she sinks back into the pillows on the couch. "Shit!" she takes a deep breath in "Aahhhhh fuck my head!" She looks around remembering where she is _Oh shit! Am I gonna be in trouble now! S_ he closes her eyes, trying to block out the hammer drill that's trying to open the door.

Lisa lets Jason in. They nod to acknowledge each other. "You better come in, she's on the couch"

Opening her eyes, she can see him standing over her, arms folded and the look on this face that makes her think he might explode. She sighs and closes her eyes again "Before you say anything, I'm not in the mood for a lecture right now."

" **UP!** "

She sighs and half opens her eyes frowning her contempt at him for doing this.

" _ **UP!... CJ GET THE HELL UP!**_ " He barks the order expecting it to be obeyed.

She gives a heavy sigh "Oh jeez! Who the hell called you?" she rubs her hand over her face trying to function.

"Seriously, one night! ... _ONE_ fucking night, and you can't manage to do what I told you"

She shakes her head trying to ignore him. Rubbing her forehead with the palm of her hand somehow that makes the aching feel better "You know, Ray told me what went on!"

"Oh Yeah. Ray! Well he would." she sighs _Funny he doesn't tell you everything though!_ she mutters under her breath as she starts pulling her boots back on, looking up to see Lisa giving Jason her superior, super disappointed face. C.J laughs looking at her _Don't get too smart, not after what I saw last night_ _  
_  
"Thanks Lisa.. for letting me stay." She says with a wry smile "Oh, and tell Sonny I said thanks too" she keeps smiling "I must have fallen asleep before I got to see him leave, which must have been late? I know he was still here when I got up to go to the bathroom, I could hear you um.. _talking_ in the kitchen"

Lisa frowns, panicked. _Oh My God she knows._

"Oh, on second thoughts, don't worry, I'd much prefer to tell him myself" she smiles again

Jason pushes her out of the door "Sorry about her. I'll speak to you later, oh and Lisa... Thanks for this!"

She nods at Jason "No problem."

He shakes his head he wishes that was true, but she was most definitely is a problem one that he needs to keep from Blackburn as well.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

She leans her head on the truck window closing her eyes. Jason has been going on and on at her since they left Davis's apartment. She hasn't listened to a single word he's been saying.

When they get back to the house he goes straight to the kitchen, clearing all of the remaining beers out of the fridge straight into trash sack.

"Is that not a little extreme? Jeez Jason, it was one night. And please, just stop with the noise right now."

He shakes his head and clatters the bottles even more "I can't trust you, not even for one night just to do as you were asked? CJ it was for good, the reason I asked you _NOT_ to go out" he sighs "Don't you get it, you could still be in danger."

She shakes her head and goes to lay on the couch. "Okay right fine, I'm sorry, alright. I get it I do but..." she closes her eyes "can we just stop with the talking and noise now please."

He's still going on as she now hears him on the phone with Sonny and as he hangs up he now starts on her again.

"Jesus! Jason, not this again. I'm sorry, look it's just..." she smiles at him " everything got to me, and left alone here, I was bored!" she shrugs "I didn't know what was going on, I just needed to get out for a bit"

"Look you're back now!" She gets up and smiles as she puts her arms round his waist and plays with the buckle on his belt. Teasing him, luring him towards her. Leaning forward she kisses him. "Hey, c'mon don't be angry. You know we could make up?" she keeps smiling as she takes his hand to lead him towards the bedroom.

"C.J, STOP! Stop. I have to go to work."

"Oh, but not yet surely?" she pouts. He shakes his head trying to resist her, but he can't. Giving in he leans down and kisses her. She smiles as he looks at her nose to nose

"Why are you always so much trouble."

She smiles "Always have been, but then you know that. I thought that's what you liked?" she laughs as she starts to undo his belt.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

They lay there in bed as he looks at his watch "I gotta go!"

"Okay..." she frowns "..if you _must?_ " She slides down under the sheet, placing gentle soft kisses down his chest, her hands trailing behind over his flesh over his muscles. Working her way in a teasing line until she gets to that perfect spot just below his naval. Kissing him there and making small teasing bites, she's tempting him more to stay with her.

"CJ stop!" he holds the sheet up so he can see her.

Her eyes fix on his and she gives him a smile, asking permission to carry on. Staring him dead in the eyes "You really want me to stop? Really? I mean I will.." she pretends like she's going to pull away.

He shakes his head and closes his eyes "No! No don't stop." he puts his hand to her head, twisting her hair in his hand, he pushes her back down against his body. " _Hmmm Ohhh jeez!"_ he sighs as he continues to tug at her hair. Untying her ponytail so her hair is now loose, it tickles across his chest and abs as she moves.

Then she's down wrapping her soft mouth around him, her tongue feels hot on him. Licking in small delicate movements around his hardness, cupping him in her hand, squeezing gently. Then she's firmer with her movements, as her head starts move back and forward. Long and slow then faster and then slowing. She can taste him, knowing that she's bringing him almost to peak. And each time she slows teasing and denying him. Stopping completely now and again just giving him a teasing smile. She knows exactly what she's doing to him.

As her mouth takes him again, he gathers her hair in his hand, wrapping it tight around his fist, now using it to force her movements at his own pace. A pace that's going to tip him over the edge. And then she feels it, that last momentary swell before he pulls away from her mouth and watches as his hot mess sprays on to her chest.

He always did love watching that moment, her satisfying him and him showing her. Her watching him cum, showing her what she'd done to him. It felt like it gave her power over him, and he liked that, her being in control.

He lets out an intense sigh and relaxes back into his pillow, closing his eyes enjoying these extra moments of pleasure. She's relaxed, virtually asleep on his stomach. He gives her towel from the chair to wipe her body and then he unwraps her legs from his and gets up.  
He's checks the time on his watch again "Shit I'm gonna be late, now"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Ray's sifting his stuff in his cage. Bagging up some clothes that need sorting and washing as Spenser heads in and looks around  
"No one else here?". He leans on the open cage door.

"Hey brother! No, only us so far" Ray looks up "You okay, how are you doin' after last night?"

Spenser nods "Yeah good, and you?"

"Yeah good man, I wonder what her head's like this morning?" they both give a quick smile "Jeez she was a mess, she'll have another hangover from hell to live with today." Spenser smiles but Ray senses Clay has something to say, "Hey Man... you sure you're okay?"

Clay doesn't answer.

"Clay don't take this the wrong way Brother, but Sonny's right you know you need to put her out of your head" he sighs " I warned you man that she's like fire. Just don't go there again! Do yourself a favor, the last thing you need is Jason on your tail especially over her"

Clay's quiet for a moment "Like you then?"

"Like me what?" he frowns

"Like you wouldn't want J on your tail?"

"No course not, man" he looks confused "No one wants Jason on them, you know that." he frowns again "Hey man what you getting at here? Look, Clay all I'm sayin' is you're flying too close to the flame"

"Yeah but you did?" Clay bites his lip. Part of him feels bad bringing it up but part of him is enjoying the moment. Ray's face drops and he swallows hard before answering

"I did what?"

"Go near the flame." Clay pauses "But see Ray, the difference was you went behind his back."

Ray stops what he's doing and looks up at Clay "What?" he gulps "What are you sayin' here brother?"

"I'm just saying..." Clay shrugs and raises his eyes ".. that if he thought someone had gone behind his back, when he _was_ seeing her, he'd be more pissed, wouldn't you say?" he tips his head "I mean at least what happened with us, well they weren't actually seeing each other"

"Clay man, I don't like your tone, you implying something here, cos if you got something to say Brother let's hear it!" Ray's breathing harder. He can feel the panic rising inside as he steps closer to Clay.

Clay thinks for a moment, he's not even sure why he's getting involved in this and he's questioning his own motive. But as they all feel free to keep giving him lectures so he feels like giving some back. "It was you wasn't it...when they split up before" he looks Ray in the eye "it was you, the one-night stand she had."

Ray laughs it off "Me?... I don't know what you're talking about brother"

"No that's _bullshit_ Ray!" Clay snaps back shaking his head "I heard her, heard what she said last night"

Ray thinks quickly but he's not gonna be able to bluff this. He looks around the room and hushes his voice "Clay man it was a mistake, okay? It was something that should have never happened" Ray's biting his lip as he speaks "We were drunk man... way too much to drink, it was... it was just a mistake. It's history now, you get me" he looks at the door "Things just got out of hand that night and no one regrets it more than me."

"But you didn't come clean. Hell, you even let her take the fall for it! She took all the blame and kept your name out of it."

"I couldn't man...look I had too much to lose. Naima, the kids" He looks around feeling guilty "Clay where you going with this? Are you gonna tell Jason?"

Clay shakes his head and shrugs "I'm just saying that's all. Just letting you know that I know your secret."

Sonny comes in and looks at the two of them. He frowns "You two okay?" He sees Ray's concerned face "Alright, what's going on? Ray?"

Ray shakes his head "Nothing man"

"Well it don't look like nothing?" Sonny eyes them suspiciously

Clay smiles and looks at Ray "No like he said nothing. Just a misunderstanding, right?" Clay folds his arms, shrugs and looks at the floor but Sonny's not buying it

"Okay, is this to do with last night?"

No one answers. Ray hangs his head. Sonny takes a guess at what Clay is asking about then he steps between Spenser and Ray. He looks around to make sure no one has walked in and gets in Spenser's face "Okay Romeo, what's your problem here? Have you got some older woman being in control fantasy scenario goin' on in your head? Cos it's not gonna happen! Especially now she's dropping her panties again for Jason"

He shakes his head "Put your dick away and forget it. Do you understand me!?" He licks his lips and rubs his chin "Whatever it is _YOU_ think you heard out of her drunken bitch mouth last night, you forget about that too" he's holding his temper as he look Clay in the eyes "That little bitch has caused enough damage without any more, are we c _lear?_ "

Clay thinks for a minute before speaking weighing up Sonny's facial expression he nods. "Oh my god!" He laughs "You already knew!"

Ray looks up confused. Sonny doesn't answer he's getting the measure of Clay. "Are we clear here Mr Spenser, because I don't want to repeat myself again"

Clay thinks. He smiles and nods "Oh we're crystal clear!"

"Right then let's get on with what we're here for. Work!"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Ruben meets Mandy at the café.

He kisses her cheek as he sits down "Two meetings so soon" he smiles "What's this about Ms Ellis?"

His crystal cut English accent charms her almost immediately. She smiles as the coffees arrives she doesn't speak while she waits for the waitress to leave. Showing no emotion, she asks "Who put the Mexico target package together ?"

He smirks "I have no idea what you're talking about Ms Ellis...I merely handed you a file" he continues to smile at her as he stirs his coffee

"You handed it to me. _BUT_ where did you get it?"

He laughs "Mandy come on you know better than to ask those questions" he shakes his head "You surprise me, I thought better of you"

She takes no notice of his flippant attitude "Who Reuben?! I need to know who put it together."

"As far as I remember, it wasn't a target package. You already had your target, before I gave you the file" he sips his coffee

She's getting annoyed at is avoidance now " _YES_ , but without that file showing that he'd switched sides, we would have gone to the wrong place. We'd have gone to the farm not the villa and based on the original intel, we had we wouldn't have got any of them. He would have disappeared with ..." She looks around "...with _the_ intel"

He puts his coffee cup down "Mandy I don't see the problem here? So, you had the right information, was that not good? Why does it matter where it came from?" he looks at her puzzled "You're very invested in this Mandy, is this something personal?"

She sits looking at him "I'm helping a _friend_ " she sips from her own coffee. They sit silent as he watches her.

"So, what happened after Rome? I didn't hear from you" he smiles wistfully

She bites her lip "Don't change the subject." She looks at him and changes to a more direct tone "Did it come from Lewis's office?" she quits messing around now

He smiles and sits back in his seat "You know Mandy, I can neither confirm nor deny anything that you ask" She leans back in her chair and watches as Reuben finishes his coffee "I merely gave you a file. The fact you went to the right place was down to you. Choosing to execute the mission with the right team, all down to you" he watches her "I'm guessing you recovered some valuable _intel?_ "

She thinks for a moment trying to get a read on his face before answering. She smiles "We got something we'd been looking for. Yes" she nods

"That's excellent then. Everyone can be happy the _intel_ is recovered" he smiles "You know I always said you were clever woman, that you'd go far. If you fancy a change of scene I could have a word with my people let them know how good you really are?" He smiles at her "Now, if that's business concluded" his tone softens "How about you let me buy you dinner?" he puts his hand on her hand.

She mellows and smiles.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

C.J's bored again. She can't keep sitting round doing nothing. She cleaned up the kitchen and picks up the trash. _The bag is heavy_. She opens the black bag, it's the beer Jason emptied out of the fridge. She opens the sack on the floor and carefully takes a bottle out. _Pheww!_ __

She studies the contents "God what a waste"

She goes back to the TV and sits for a while flicking channels, but she can't get the bag of beer bottles out of her head, and heads back to the kitchen. She grabs a bag of chips and the bottle "Oh what the hell!"

Davis had sorted her a spare phone and its ringing, she answers "Hey, how are you?" Jason's voice, and she smiles that he thought to call her "Yeah I'm good. Bit bored, how long have I gotta stay cooped up here?"

"Just sit tight I'm working on it"

"Okay!" she sighs

"Look, I'll be back soon " he tries to reassure her, the sigh reminding him she's bored and frustrated and he knows that not a good thing

She takes the chips and the empty bottle back to the kitchen and stares out of the window. _Oh, I feel fine, it was the whiskey that did it last night!_ She convinces herself as she delves in the trash bag and take out another bottle of beer.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

She's asleep on the couch when Jason comes back. There are several empty bottles on the floor and the table. He looks around "Oh!...shit!"  
He sighs out loud as he rubs his head then kisses her cheek "Hey! Wake up you!"

 _"Hmmmm!._ Oh hey, you're back!" she smiles as she wakes

"What's going on here?"

"Oh! Um... look, don't start, alright! I'm sorry, okay it was just a couple to help me sleep."

He shakes his head. He's mad. She can tell as she watches him pace back and forwards in front of the TV. "C.J, what the hell am I gonna do with you?" he's loud and she squints "Do you need help, like professional help again?"

"No, God no! Really I'm fine. Look, I'll admit it's been stressful, it just helps to relax me, but I'm good, I promise!" she smiles at him "Last night, it won't happen again." She tips her head and looks at him trying to win his affections back then her face drops as she looks up.

She's now looking past him at the TV, or more a picture of her father on the screen as Jason continues yelling "Ray and Sonny told me what you were like. What you did!" then suddenly he realises she's not looking at him "Are you even listening to me?... C.J?!"

"What's that?" she frowns "Turn it up!...The thing on the news with my father" she points

"What?" he turns around "The thing, your father... what? Oh shit!" He swallows, realising its the news coverage on her Mother's death. With what went on last night it he'd totally lost track about broaching the subject with her, and now he doesn't know what to say. "Um... Look, there's something I need to talk to you about."

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

She's asleep on the bed.

"Thanks!" Jason slaps Trent on the arm

"It should help her sleep for a bit" Trent sighs "I didn't wanna give her too much, not after everything she's been through, I didn't want her to be too out of it. But that'll help get through tonight"

Jason goes through to where the others are and sits on the couch. He lets out a huge sigh and puts his head in his hands. He looks up as Ray hands him a beer. Sonny watches Clay but doesn't say a word. They're all gathered in the living room and this heavy tension hangs in the air. As no one speaks.

Finally, Sonny's the one to break the silence "So what are you going do with her?"

"I don't know." Jason sighs shaking his head and sipping at his beer "I really don't know, Sonny."

"You know you can't leave her, not if we get spun up." Sonny looks around at everyone "I mean after the way she crashed and burned the other night, this...this is going to send over the edge"

Clay thinks carefully before speaking "Do you think it's time to get Blackburn to make that call, get her father involved now?" Jason glares at him and though Sonny and Ray don't say anything they do think Clay might have a point "I mean he might be able to deal with her, get her some help. It would take some pressure off you."

Jason shakes his head "No! No, not yet. She'll hate it if I get him involved. She hasn't forgiven him for what he's already done, and I still can't be sure what his involvement is in this"

"Come on man you have to let that go. She told you, he didn't lie to you"

"NO! But he must have known she'd been taken from there and what did he do about it? ...Nothing!"

"I don't know brother, maybe he was dealing with it? We got her back so, just let it go and let Blackburn call him." Clay sighs "Jason, for her sake" Clay shakes his head. He thinks Jason is letting his emotions cloud his decisions and it's a big mistake "Come on man with all these quick ops Ellis is sending us on, you can't leave her here, not like this"

"No, I'm not calling him yet. I need some time to work things out"

They all look at each other and drink their beers. Though they don't say it, they all think Jason is making a big mistake.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Mandy sighs as she waits in the impressive lobby watching as the Admiral strides past in a hurry. She quickly follows behind him, trying to keep pace in her high heels.

"Admiral Lewis!" she calls out "May I have a word Sir"

He stops and looks at her "And you are?"

"Mandy Ellis..." she coughs "... CIA"

He looks around "I don't have time now, make an appointment!"

"Sir!" she calls as he walks away "With all due respect Sir, you know you won't want an appointment with me in your diary"

He looks around the lobby and nods looking her up and down "Very well Ms Ellis, this way!" They enter a side room and he sits on the desk edge and folds his arms "What can I do for you?"

"Do you know what was found at the property in Mexico?"

"Mexico?" He laughs "I have no idea Ms Ellis" he laughs "I've heard nothing about anything _found_ in Mexico. Though I'm trusting any operation there went well? And everyone came back safe" He frowns watching as she stares at him. She doesn't say a word. "So, if that's all you came to tell me Ms Ellis, then thank you, but like I said I have a meeting to attend"

She pauses "I need to know ...did you put the lists together?"

He turns scowling at her "Ms Ellis... you will need to be much more specific, I deal with a lot of people, and lot of lists" he stares blankly at her

"The compromised personnel and cartel payrolls"

He's silent. "What would make you think I would be involved with 'cartel payroll' as you call them?"

"Because you headed up an undercover drugs task force, one your daughter was involved with. It wasn't your name on the list was it. It was hers. The Somalia OP did you pull that because she'd been compromised?" Mandy is guessing she has no evidence but it's the best she's put together since she told Jason she would look into it.

He smiles "Ms Ellis this sounds a lot of fantasy and fiction. As you probably well know, mine and my daughter's relationship is highly classified information. So, I have no idea what you are talking about" he pauses "If you don't mind I need to get to my meeting."

She has one last chance, so she just comes out with her theory. "It put your daughter at risk didn't it? They used her against you, from acting on that list. Someone in your office went rogue and got her on that Nigeria OP, with BRAVO. It was a message to you that they still controlled things." She pauses, staring at him "That video... when they beat her, that was a message to you. And then they took her from the clinic, didn't they? The intruders at the house. Sir, were you there? Was that another warning to everyone of consequences?"

The Admiral studies Mandy carefully "Ms Ellis, I've been told from some very trusted people that you are a very clever woman and will go far. But my advice, be careful about having too much curiosity about things" He looks at his watch. "Now if you don't mind, I do have a meeting."

He leaves. She lets out a long sigh. She hasn't pieced it all together. _But I will!_ The things he didn't say confirms her theories so far.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

She sighs as she wakes up. Jason's stroking her hair "Hey, you okay?" She nods, cuddling her body tighter against his as he holds her "I'm sorry I should have told you before."

She sits herself up now, holding his cheek. She doesn't say a word, just starts kissing him. She needs to get out of her head space for now.

"Jason be with me!" She sighs, quietly looking him in the eyes. He looks at her and kisses her back.

The warmth of her mouth against his as she pulls him towards her. He knows exactly what she wants him to do. He kisses her neck before pulling her legs so she's sat over his lap, so now he can kiss her breasts. His mouth teasing at the nipple on one and his hand on the other massaging rolling her small button between his thumb and finger, making it stiffen and peak.

 _"ahhh!_ Jason!" she groans "Fuck me...please!" She's getting turned on and shifts position on the bed opening her legs, showing him what she wants, willing him to take her. Then pulls her vest over her head and throws it to the side of the bed as he continues to kiss her all over.

Kissing all her soft delicate skin across her chest and down her stomach to the edge of her warmth where he rubs his hand. She's wet and he circles his fingers on her clit while sitting himself between her legs watching as she plays with nipples teasing him. The spark of sex in her eyes willing him hard. " _Mmmm!_ " she's closes her eyes and sighs. " _Jason,_ I want you. _Please , now_!" She breathlessly begs him again.

But he's ready to tease her more, and he gently strokes at the wet, softness between her legs, his fingers gently probing but it's not enough, it's not satisfying her, she wants _him_ , his firm thickness, she wants that inside her not this teasing. Not today. Today, she wants his power and strength pounding her. She wants to lose all control and surrender to him "Jason ... _Please!_ "

She smiles and bites her lip as he pushes he fingers back and forward reaching in deep looking to find that spot inside her. He brings her hand down placing it over her bud, willing her to touch herself, to bring her own pleasure "Oh GOD!" she shakes her head frustrated "No please, I want you!" she doesn't want this she just him fucking her hard.

He kisses at her lips and she's all over those kisses with her mouth and tongue. She doesn't want to feel or think about anything except having sex with him. He can see and feel that want, that need for him and if he's going to fuck her hard, then it's going to be hard. "Turn over!"

She smiles as she gets herself positioned on her hands and knees. Her ass in the air, back arched as he runs his fingers in her wet, checking she's ready for what he's going to give her. He teases at her entrance running his swollen tip through her wet, touching her twitching clit with it. Him doing that brings her to a balanced peak, but she won't give in because that's not what she wants, not yet.

"Jason for god sake...will you just fuck me!" She's impatient, as she grips at the covers her face planted in the soft pillow ready for that first thrust and as he pushes in slow and deep she can feel a tension knot in her stomach  
"Oh god yesssss!" Her insides stretch taking all of him as he pushes in so deep, leaning over her ass cheeks grabbing at her breast. He's not gentle now. Now she's going to feel all of his strength but he's not worried because he's done this before, and she loves it.

All his weight and force is now pushing back and forward inside her. Deep, full to the hilt thrusts. His sack bursting wanting to release with every slap against her flesh. He's using such force now shes having problems staying on her knees using all her strength to force her hips back against him. "Oh god! Yes! Oh yes Jason.. harder!"

She puts her hand down and finds her swollen bud, its longing to be touched and as she plays with it she can feel the vibrations of her orgasm starting to build and there it is as its peak. He can feel it he can feel it, the tension in her muscles, in her back arcs, her stomach tensing, her breast so pert "I'm gonna cum!" she breathlessly pants letting him know.

He nods. He's having to concentrate now, slowing his pace so that he doesn't peak before her and spoil her moment but it's too late, that last breathless whisper from her lips sends him over the point of no return. She can feel what's happened as the wet fills between her legs down her thighs while he continues to pump with all the energy he has left.

She closes her eyes and concentrates now, only one thing in her mind until, there it is, a crashing wave of electric pulses. Her hips buck, legs shake as he withdraws, sitting back on his heels watching her, kneading her ass cheeks as he watches her come against her own hand.  
 _Fuck that's sexy! She's sexy. This is what I missed._

They lay there on the bed in breathless silence for a while. "You alright?" he frowns at her "You're quiet?"

"Yeah I'm fine" she nods "Don't worry!" she smiles and then curls herself up in his arms. She closes her eyes and drifts off to sleep.

His phone Bleeps "SHIT! Not again!" He opens his eyes and sighs.  
He watches her still sleeping as he gets dressed.

He leaves the bedroom "Now what the hell am I gonna do?" he thinks for a moment and then he calls Ray

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Naima's shouting at Ray. The little one's crying. Ray's trying with no success to settle him. "Naima I wouldn't ask you know that but ... look Jason's in a fix!" he pleads "Please, Naima this _one_ time? It's the last time... I promise! I'll get Jason to sort it" he keeps looking at her praying she will give in "Just keep an eye, that's all he's asking?"

"NO! _NO Ray!_ I told you... NEVER again!"

"Naima look I've gotta go. I'm begging you please just say you'll swing by. keep an eye on her. Make sure she's not drinking! Look, you don't have to stay there if you don't want...just keep an eye on her"

Jason knocks on the door. "Hey!"

Ray rolls his eyes and shakes his head. He hands the little one to Jason "I need to get my stuff"

Naima looks at Jason and his face "NO! _NO_ Jason! I already told Ray, so please don't ask me this again!"

He hands the child back to her. He has to try anything to bring her round "I thought that's what BRAVO was about? Family. Taking care of each other" then he gulps before he says his next sentence. His guilt trip "You know Alana would have done it! Sure, she'd have hated it too, but she would've done it" He lies. There is no way in hell Alana would have done what he's asking. Not for CJ

Naima is even more fuming **_"_** _DON'T!_ ** _"_** she seethes "Don't you dare use that on me _NO!_ Jesus Jason, I can't believe you would bring her name into this where that..." she pauses "...where that tramp is concerned"

"Sorry but I'm begging you, for me? Just so I can be sure she's okay while we are gone, we shouldn't be more than a couple of days based on the others of these. She's just not in a good place at the moment after finding out about her Mothers murder"

Naima looks up shaking her head and closes her eyes "Oh My GOD! I hate you so much Jason Hayes. For doing this to me" tears prick her eyes "FINE! But This is the _very last time!_ Do you understand...NEVER again!"

She shuts her eyes she can't believe she's saying this " I'll keep an eye but that's all. Don't ever ask me again" She's raging with Jason, but she sighs trying to let her tension go as she doesn't want Ray to leave on an argument. "Kiss the children" she says to Ray "Now me" she points.

He sighs and smiles as he kisses Naima on the head "We good?" she reluctantly nods as he smiles at her "Thank you! I love you so much you know that"

"You know I want that decorating done when you get back... Both of you!" she looks at Jason and Ray they look at each other and smile.

"Sure, no problem" Jason smiles then he also kisses her on the top of her head "As soon as we get back, it's done!"

Jason leaves the keys to the house. He doesn't speak just nods to Naima who looks away. They leave and she sighs so hard. She's knotted up inside " _Grrrrrraaaahh!_ " She screams as she throws the keys at the door.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

C.J comes around to the sound of the TV and children "What the fuck?!" she listens for a while then gets up. She's only wearing her vest and panties and heads out the bedroom door.

There on the floor are two small children coloring."What the ..." she's confused. Then she hears the sounds of dishes in the kitchen and goes through. Naima turns from the sink to look at her. "Oh Shit!"C.J shakes her head and lets out a long sigh.

The two women don't speak. Naima sighs to herself "Keep Calm!"

C.J closes the bathroom door and slides down to the floor and puts her head in her hands letting out another huge sigh "Shit!... Fuck! Fuck! That's all I need!"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Nearly 40 hrs have passed. Naima's phone goes and she looks at the text "It's Ray... they're back!" she sighs "Come on kid's time to get your things we can go home" C.J's half asleep on the couch she sits up and looks at Naima "I said that was Ray.. they're back!"

She gathers the kids ready to leave.

C.J rubs her head "Thank god! That was too stressful" She watches as Naima drives away then she lays back on the couch and sighs while thinking about things.

She heads into the kitchen and puts the trash out the back door. There by the garbage bin is the black bag with the rest of the beers Jason threw out. She brings it in "Fuck it!"

o- **o-o-o-o-o-o**

Jason gets back later that evening. It's all quiet C.J's asleep on the couch, the TV sound is blaring out loud and he turns it down, creeping around putting his bag down. As he does so he kicks the box by the couch, and it rattles.

He looks down "Oh Shit! Oh no, not again! Fuck!" he sees what's in it. It's full of empty beer bottles "Where the hell did she get those?" He lifts his hat and rubs his head. "WAKE UP! C.J ..Wake the hell up!"

She comes around. "Hey" she smiles "finally you're back. Ray text Naima hours ago"

"Yeah sorry we got caught up in de brief. Took longer than expected"

"Never mind you're back now" she smiles and puts her hands to his face, but he pushes her back, his expression is cold and blank. She stands looking at him "Hey you okay? Everyone's okay, right?" she frowns as she puts her arms round his neck and tries to kiss him "I missed you!"

He nods but is still cool with her taking her arms from round his neck "Looks like it!"

"Oh that! It's fine don't worry about, really, I'm fine." She smiles "Jason it's just a couple of beers to relax. What with everything, you know how it is!" she shrugs it off

"Yeah, I know"

"Yeah I know!" she frowns at his tone "So, what's that supposed to mean? Jason, are you pissed with me? Oh, come on Jason!" she pleads with her eyes "Where's the harm. I mean it's not like you don't do it right, like now you get back you have a drink to unwind"

"A drink C.J not that!" pointing at the box with the bottles

She sighs "Oh so what" she sight "I'm bored!" she shrugs "It's okay for you. You don't have to sit here waiting. You've still got the thrill of it all. The action. The danger. What have I got the fuckin' TV?" she says throwing the remote at the wall.

"C.J!" He shakes his head "I can't believe you did this again."

She shrugs and playfully smiles "Hey, forget about the beer come here" she says kissing him, but he doesn't respond. She starts to tug at his pants.

"STOP!" he pushes her back

"Stop?!" She sneers at his rejection "C'mon, you don't mean that?" she smiles again

"Not this time okay" He's really pissed with her "You're not getting around me this time. You need some help!"

She shakes her head "I'm fine. I promise! Jason, I am.. look I'm fine!" She can see he's not budging " Oh come on, look if you're that bothered then No more, okay? I swear! When you're not here I'll do as you say, alright?" She holds her hands up

"Not good enough C.J" he sighs "This is not happening. This is done, do you understand me?"

She's starts to get angry with his attitude towards her "What? Oh Jesus Jason, what do you want from me? What you want me to be perfect? You know I'm not that, I've never been that! Oh, I get it... you want me to be Alana now, be like her. Tow the line, behave like she would. Yeah?" She shakes her head "Not gonna happen"

He slaps her hard across the cheek "I can't believe you just said that!"

"FUCK!" she puts her hand the hot red pain on her face "What the fuck Jason?! What the hell was that about?"

"Christ!" he closes his eyes, regretting what he just did. "Look, I'm sorry... I shouldn't have done that, but Jeez you always have to push it" he shakes his head "C.J you, you've given me no choice here. This, us .. this is done!"

"No choice in what, what does that mean?"

He rubs his head with his hands. Suddenly his tiredness catches up with him and he sits on the arm of the couch "I'm gonna let Eric make his call tomorrow. He's been on at me and he's right, it's time! And I ... I can't deal with you, not like this" he shakes his head "Jeez.. I can't believe I'm saying that! But the teams right, maybe only your Father can make you see sense now or get you the help you need. I don't know"

She grinds her teeth and she's pissed at him now "What? Why are you gonna involve him? Jesus, I'm not a naughty child you just hand back!" she shakes her head "That's not happening, I'm not going back there, I won't do rehab again. I can't!" She swallows hard wondering how to change his mind "Jason, Jason c'mon we're fine" she softens her tone trying to bring him round "It's just a blip. Look I'll stop drinking, I promise! Really come on please!" she touches his arm and puts her hand to his cheek "Don't let him send me back there."

He gets up and gets his keys "Just sleep it off. I'll be back later"

"Where are you going? Jason!Come back, don't you walk out on me!"

She screams as Jason closes the door "Fuck you! You know your trouble Jason... you're no fun anymore! _Arrrgghhhhh!_ " she screams again and again, over and over. Throwing one of the bottles that's on the table in the direction he left.

Then she slumps back on the couch. "Fuck!" she rubs her head with her hand.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Clay's just getting in the shower. He needs it. These quick-fire missions are getting tiring now _I'll be glad when this list is completed._ He looks up as there's a knock on the door _Damn who's that at this time._ He gets a towel and wraps round his naked waist

"Coming hold on!" He opens the door. "C.J?!" He looks at her surprised and confused "What the hell are you doing here?"

She looks him up and down just wrapped in the towel. She smiles and holds up a bottle of wine. "Surprise! I thought you might like some company?" she tips her head and smiles.

He looks down the corridor. "What are you doing here? Where's Jason?" He looks at her "CJ, have you been drinking?" he frowns

"Maybe!? Oh, don't worry, not much! Hey Clay, don't worry" she smiles again "You gonna let me in?"

"C.J you being here, this is not a good idea"

She shrugs "What can I say I was bored!"

He smiles "Maybe so but this is wrong, and you need to go!"

She looks him up a down seeing him there in that small towel covering what she knows is underneath it. She puts her hand on his bare chest. "Seriously you want me to go?" She unzips the front of her hoodie slightly. He can see she only has a black lace bra on underneath.

He thinks for a minute "This is wrong!"

Everything about this is wrong. Everything Sonny and Ray warned him about. Warned him not to do. He sighs. "I'm sorry, but really you need to leave" he can't believe he actually said it, not as he looks at her standing there teasing him.

She bites her lip and nods her head thinking "You sure?" she pauses "You sure you don't want just one glass of wine, as friends? Friends can have a drink together, right?"

"NO! I'm sure! You _NEED_ to go...it's for the best... for both of us!"

"Okay... fine!" now she pissed. She's not used to being rejected and that's twice tonight, so it stings. She huffs "What is it with you guys lately you've lost all your fun" she shakes her head and turns to leave "Fine I'm gone!"

Clay closes the door. He stands behind the closed door with his head leaning on it. He shakes his head telling himself over and over that it was for the best him telling her to go.

She makes a couple of steps down the corridor before turning back, looking at the closed door to his apartment. She sighs "Shit!" Then just as she's about to leave she hears the click of the latch; the door opens a couple of inches and she smiles.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Clay's in the shower while she finds two glasses and pours the wine. He comes out drying his hair and she hands him a glass "Friends!"

He nervously toasts "Friends!" he raises his glass "You know this really... really is not a good idea" His head is now screaming for him to tell her to go unfortunately the hard in his groin is telling him something else.

 _What the fuck are you doing Clay?_ He can hear Ray and Sonny shouting at him. He puts the glass down and rubs the sweat off his face with the towel. "If Jason finds out you're here!"

"Don't worry so much!" she smiles "He's not going to." she bites her lip then drinks some more wine ""Soooo" she smiles "we good?" She tips her head to look at him flirting.

He nods. She drinks her wine and tops up what she's drunk already. "You know you should slow down, if you've already been drinking!"

"Not you as well!... Jeez!" she scowls at Clay she puts on this imaginary voice copying his words "C.J slow down, CJ stop!... C.J too much... blah blah! _"_ she screws up her face and takes another big drink from the glass.

Clay frowns "Have you and Jason had words?"

She shrugs and laughs. She looks blankly at him and sighs. "You know he's gonna call my father tomorrow. Treating me like I'm some naughty child!" she smirks and sighs again "Ce le vie! Who cares, tomorrows tomorrow, right. Tonight, we do what we want!"

She raises her glass before taking another big swig of the wine. She licks and bites her bottom lip teasing him as she steps forward to be nearer unzipping her hoodie and taking it off.

"Look I really don't think this is a good idea. I mean, you're with Jason now. You made your choice. CJ, I'm sorry but this can't happen"

She shrugs sand shakes her head "What you don't want me? "

"CJ,it's not that! You know that's not true, but you made a choice."

"But what if I chose wrong? What if it's you I really want...you that I need?"

"You're only saying this cos you've been drinking; it'll seem different tomorrow!"

She shakes her head and slumps down on the couch "God I'm so confused" she closes her eyes. "How can you want two people so much" She puts her hand across her mouth to stifle her cry. Her head's a mess and she's so tired.

He shakes and scratches his head "You know I want you so much, but it can't be. You know that Jason will never allow it." He looks at her "Please don't ask me to choose Bravo or you. Because that's what you'd be doing"

She gets herself together. "I'd never make either of you choose that. Never!" She knocks the last of the wine back and stands the empty glass in front of the TV. Getting up she goes straight over to him and starts kissing him. He tries to push her back, but she keeps trying and he eventually he gives in to her persuasion. Then picking her up he carries her to the bedroom and lies her down. Rubbing his hands over her lace bra.

"Oh God! _Huuhhh! "_ he sighs " Do you know how bad I want you?" he smiles, his body feels hard and he's almost frantic to take her now.

"Then have me!" she smiles.

With those words he unzips her pants and pulls them off. Then wriggling her out of her lace panties.

Then he's on top her. Her hand takes hold of him guiding his hard into her as he pushes weight against her waiting want. She breaths deep in anticipation. Arching her back and pushing her hips to him. His hands are all over her body now, and he's kissing her neck.

He wants all that she's offering. He's so turned on now there will be no stopping this happening. They're kissing and can't get enough of each other; they really can't stop.

"You sure you want to do this?" he looks at her wondering hoping in some ways she stops him but also hoping she doesn't.

She breathless with pleasure nodding "Yeah I want this!"

"Okay!" he smiles the whole thought of taking her again after all this time sends a surge of adrenaline down his body. Remembering what she likes he turns her over on her front facing down and undoes her bra. Then he runs his hands down her back to the top of her smooth butt cheek his hand dipping between her legs, his other griping round her stomach holding her in place then he takes all of his readiness and pushes it in hard.

" _Mmmm!_ " She groans she'd forgotten just how much his width filled her. That it gave a delicious pain as she got accustomed to him  
"Oh fuck! Aahhhhh!" she closes her eyes fantasizing about what's coming.

He steadies himself; he can feel her slight resistance until he's able to gain full entry pushing in slow gradual moves. Feeling all of her. Pulling her backwards against him. Her ass cheeks up against his hips

"Awww!" She sucks in air "Huhhhh!" she pants " Oh Clay don't stop!"

He has no intention there is only one thing on his mind now as he holds her head down, taking her from behind with every bit of energy he has.  
He knows she loves this, him having control over her. The power is more intense in this position. All he's concentrating on now is himself and his satisfaction nothing else has his attention as she grips at the covers bracing herself against his force.

She breaths deep at each move of his. it's still enough to turn her on his hand bracing himself against her cheeks before using putting his fingers between her thighs giving the required stimulation to her clit bringing her to a peak as pounds himself into her.

She loses herself in her head thinking only about having no control. It's him taking her that she loves so much. Giving up her normal self-control. She cum and is ready to collapse then that signals him for his moment.

He beats at her hole with all of his strength, fast and furious, hard and pulling her hair! Aahhhhh! She smiles, she loves it when it's all powerful like this.  
She struggles to steady herself but she does then there it is he pulls out from inside her sprays a wave of wet cum on her back "Ohhhh Fuck!...Jeez CJ I forgot how good that was!"

His strong arms steady them both until they collapse in a sweaty, wet heap on the bed. He wipes her back with the towel he had wrapped round him from the shower. Cleaning the mess he made of her, before he lays beside her, taking his weight off and running his fingers down her butt then tracing along the lines of her curves.

She shivers now sensitive to his touch " _Mmmm!_ " she groans, her face red flushed with fulfilment "God that was good" She's breathless. It definitely satisfied her want and she hopes his.

Turning over she lays her head back closing her eyes. He's kissing her chest and stomach before turning to her lips to her now sensitive breast. Kissing his thanks on them until they lay wrapped in each other, drifting in and out of sleep.

He opens his eyes looking at the ceiling and rubbing his head now the reality dawns on him "What the hell have I done?" he sighs the heavy smell of sex and sweat in the air still.

She senses his problem "Hey...don't worry." she kisses him "Clay... I said don't worry" she looks at him "It's gonna be okay!" she smiles.

He hides his feelings behind his smile and sighs. "I think I need another shower!"

"Come on then!" she smiles as she sits up .

The water adds to the tingle as they wash each other.

She looks him deep in the eyes "You want more?" she feels a flicker of hard flinch as she gently takes him in her hand massaging the soap around him, pulling and tugging gently till he's solid again.

She lets the clean water rinse her from him before she sinks to her knees, the warm water running down her hair and back while she wraps her mouth around him. He steadies himself between the wall and shower screen.

"Oh fuck!" he closes his eyes while she now brings him to peak with her mouth the warm of her tongue on his length combined with the cascade of water that dilutes the taste of him.

Finally, as it's really late and they're both exhausted and they fall asleep on the bed.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Jason's pissed she hasn't come back. He's mad with himself that he left. _Shit! I shouldn't have left!_ a

And now she's not even answering her phone "Christ where the hell is she?" He's so tired from the spin ups he can't think about her anymore and as he sits by himself on the couch he eventually falls asleep where he sits.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o**

It's Morning and she's still not back. He's hardly slept well. He really wishes he hadn't said anything to her. _I pushed her too far!_ He looks at his watch he has to be at meeting with Eric and Mandy in an hour.

As he gets changed he calls Sonny "Hey look, C.J hasn't come back last night, we had a few words. Could you um...drop by this morning, a bit later to check on her, see if she's back. I have to be at a meeting"

Sonny frowns "Yeah sure thing Boss." It's not something he really wants to do but he will

"Sonny, tell her I'm sorry and I'll sort it when I get back."

"Okay, will do! Hey Jason.. ..she'll be fine! You know her, probably just sleeping it off somewhere"

"Yeah that's what worries me, Sonny!"

Sonny looks at Davis. Lisa pulls a face "Where do you think she is?"

"Who knows with her any where's possible. Probably crashed out drunk somewhere." he sighs "Looks like we have to make a detour when we leave."

She smiles "Yeah but we have some time before we have to go! Can you think of anything to do?"

" _Hmmm!_ Now Davis there is an offer" he leans in and kisses her

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Clay's getting dressed. She's still laid naked, watching him. She smiles and crawls to the end of the bed where she sits up on her knees in front of him. They start kissing again.

"Look I'm sorry, I have to go to work" He smiles and runs his hands down her hair, down her back and on to her butt.

She smiles. "Not yet" She gives him this look.

He starts kissing her and lays her back on the bed. "This is so tempting but really... I have to go!"

"Come here." she smiles as she lays back putting her knees up and opening her legs, he looks at her laid there willing him to her. Then he can't resist, and he unzips his pants dropping them back on the floor then climbs back on the bed between them. He closes his eyes and gives in  
"You are so bad!"

"I know." She gives this devilish grin "But fun, right?"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

He's doing his combats up. " _aww_! You're such a spoilsport" she smiles, pulling the sheet around her to cover her nakedness

"I have to go, I'm getting late" she shrugs "C.J this...this has to stop! This is bad" he smiles

She turns on her side throwing the sheet back, laying there naked "But like I said... fun!" she smiles

He shakes his head and smiles. "Oh god so much fun, but ... so bad!" he kisses her "Right...I'm gone! You can stay, but click the lock if you leave, alright?"

He's gone and she goes to the kitchen to get a glass of water. As she opens the cupboard to take out a glass she notices there on the shelf is a small brown pot with her name on. She picks it up examining the contents of the bottle of painkillers. One that she had here from before she left, when she was recovering. She shakes them _hmmmm a new one! Wonder why they're still here?_

She sighs and smiles before she puts them in her hoodie jacket pocket and gets her glass of water, standing in the kitchen thinking about what's gone on. The reality now hitting home she doesn't feel so good about last night and she starts to shake

"Shit!" she rubs her head. She needs to speak to Jason. There's things she needs to tell him. But then after last night how can she do that? Would he even listen? God knows but she does know she's now complicated this whole mess further. But last night she just needed to be with someone because she didn't want to be on her own.

Clay's untouched glass of wine stands on the counter with the rest of the bottle they didn't drink. She picks it up and takes a sniff before drinking it down in one. _I should NOT be doing this! S_ he tells herself as she pours the rest into the glass and takes it to the couch where she turns the on the TV.

Laying back she lets out a big sigh "What the hell am I going to do to fix this?" her heads in her hands. She can't think straight "What a fuckin' mess!" She rubs her hands through her hair and ties it back. She doesn't want to give up either of them but if she's honest Jason has gotten so moody and Clay is much more fun. I need to sort this once and for all!

There are other complications she's gonna have to deal with as well. Things she needed to talk to Jason about but didn't get the chance. She sighs while she drinks the wine for now she doesn't want to think about it anymore. "I just need to sleep!"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Sonny and Davis get to Jason's house. They knock "No answer!" They have a quick look in the window, but it appears she's still not back.

"So where would she have gone?" Davis asks Sonny "The bar?"

Sonny shakes his head thinking. He lifts his hat and rubs his head Sighing. "Oh GODAMMIT!"

Davis looks at him "What?"

"I think I might know where she might be! I damn well hope not!" he slaps his palm on the car roof.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

They hurry along the corridor to Clay's apartment. "If she's here, I don't know what I'm gonna do to her" he looks at Davis "and him! Hell, I told him to stay the god damn hell away from her. But no... that damn itch in his pants! It's gonna cost him if he's not careful!"

Davis gulps she hopes to god Sonny's wrong and she's not here.

They knock no answer. Davis sighs "That's a good sign. She's not here?"

Sonny knocks again and tries the handle the door is on the latch and opens. He pushes it gently opening the door. Putting his head slowly around

"Oh Shit!" he turns to Davis "Lisa call 911!"

He opens the door to find C.J lying on the couch her arm draped off the edge. She has her eyes closed. The empty brown medication bottle is on the floor with the lid off and the empty wine bottle fallen off the small table.

Davis pushes the door "Oh... dear god!" she rushes in and starts to feel for a pulse.

Sonny takes his hat off and rubs his head " You God-damn!...stupid bitch"


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 18: I'm Sorry**

Ray's out of breath as he puts his hand to the door of Blackburn's office. He knocks hard, waiting impatiently.

"COME!" Blackburn calls out as he looks up from his paperwork, at Mandy and Jason. They're sitting in front of his desk as Ray opens the door and enters. "Senior Chief Perry what can we do for you?" Blackburn frowns

For a moment he doesn't say a word, just stands in the doorway, staring at Jason. He frowns, looking at him puzzled "What's up Ray?"

"You need to come. Right now!" They all glance at each other, concerned by the fraught urgency of his request.

Jason pushes his chair back, picking up his jacket before he heads out, following behind Ray.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay's in his cage. Changing his clothes and sorting some of his things out. It all seems pretty quiet as he looks around the empty room.  
 _No one's here yet?_ He's puzzled because he thought he was one who was late. _Still that's good._ _At least I'm not getting in trouble!_

He smiles thinking about last nights, and this mornings, passionate session with CJ. _S_ _he's such a bad influence!_ Then he closes his eyes, leaning his head back, thinking about her body, the feel of it against his. She might be that bit older than him, but he'd never know it, she's just so full of energy when they make love. Even the thoughts of how wild she is turns him on.

He lets out a deep sigh, rubbing his his face, thinking. Concerned about where this relationship is going to go _What the fuck am I going to do about her?_ When the door to the locker room opens. Trent quietly enters, disturbing Clay's thoughts. "Hey man!" He looks up and smiles."Where is everyone? I thought I was the one that was late"

Trent's has this stony, pale expression of concern, and he pauses a moment before he speaks "Clay..." He frowns "I'm sorry, I've got some bad news"

Clay's puzzled and frowns "Bad news? Sorry, what bad news?" He looks at Trent's face, trying to get a read on what's happened "Trent, what is it?"

"It's not good." He shakes his head "I'm sorry, I thought you'd wanna know. You need to come with me now"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay's head's spinning as he runs up the stairs. He's taking deep breaths as he tries to keep himself calm, striding along the corridor until he reaches the door to his his door to his apartment. It's just slightly ajar and he pushes it open looking around the round the room,

"What's going on?" He frowns looking at all the tubes and empty packets of discarded medical equipment on the floor. There in a heap is the black zip hoodie that CJ had been wearing.

Ray has his hands in his pockets and is kicking a piece of paper around the floor and he doesn't look up. Sonny has his head in his arms leaning against the wall with Davis standing beside him and Jason, he's just sat on his own in the bedroom, on the messed-up bed. The messed-up bed Clay just left CJ in, only a few hours ago.

Clay looks around at them all, everyone glances at him but they don't say a word. He can't breathe, his head's spinning with complicated thoughts

"No! No! Oh god no!" His chest tightens and he can't breathe and he bends his knees squatting down, taking a minute to gather his thoughts. He feels sick, dizzy, his heart beating off the chart and his mind racing around.

 _No! She was fine when I left. She was happy, she was smiling. Oh my god! But she was flirting and willing me back to bed! I should have stayed with her!_ _Why? Why has this happened?_ He rubs his hands through his hair, scratching his head trying to make some sort of sense.

Ray looks up at Davis and Sonny as they all exchange silent glances. Now Jason looks up from the bedroom. He's suddenly aware of Clay's presence in the room and he glares at him. Then he's up and on his feet and then before anyone's able to stop him he's pinning Clay to the wall, holding him by his collar "Why? Why the hell was she here? Tell me! I said TELL ME! What the hell were you doing?"

Ray steps in loosening Jason's grip "Jason man, cool it." he struggles trying to push him back. Grabbing at his arm, they tussle and Ray lets him go. "JASON!" but he's just not listening. He's in his own zone now, and he smacks Clay around the side of the head. Clay takes it not saying a word as Jason hits him, over and over. Clay's only reaction is to put his arms up over his head to protect himself from the blows. For some reason he feels like he deserves it.

Eventually,Ray and Sonny manage between them to pull Jason away. It takes all of their strength between them, to sit him down"Cool it man! Brother, this isn't doing anyone any good."

Sonny pushes Spenser back "I told you no good would come of this. Why they hell can't you listen."

"What?" Clay's lost for words "You're blaming me? Blaming me for this?" he looks around the room "This isn't my fault! He...he was the one she argued with."

Jason can't get a grip on his emotions " _YOU!_..You messed with her head. You confused her."

"ME?" Clay fights back "You were the one messed her up, leaving her when she needed you, last night! But then that's nothing new is it.I mean, you messing her up! You did that before, you wouldn't give her a chance, every time she messes up you never listen to her."

And then, even though it kills him to say it "You don't get it do you" he takes a breath "She loved you! But all you ever did was blame her,you never gave her a chance!"

Ray panics he thinks Clay's going to say too much. But as Jason steps forward again it's Sonny who pushes him back "JASON cool it, man!"  
The two men stare at each other. The as they stand there in this weird stare off it's broken by the collective sounds of bleeping of phones.  
"Shit!" Sonny rubs his head as he looks at the message then he looks to the sky "Great just what we need right now!"

Something clicks in with Jason and he becomes totally unemotional, taking a deep breath he looks at them all "Okay lets pack this up, let's go!"

Everyone looks at him. "Jason.." Ray looks at him ".. you can't be serious man. Jace, you need to take a minute. You need to call Blackburn tell him we need to stand down."

"And I _said_ let's go, Ray!" he takes a deep breath "There's nothing more we can do here"

Ray shakes his head and shrugs at Sonny who in turn looks at Davis "Okay you heard the man! Lets pack it up and do some work."

"Suits me just fine" Sonny looks at Davis and smiles "All this emotional stuff is hard work"

As they get to the door Jason grabs Clay by the collar and pushes him back " _NOT YOU!"_ he's still so very angry "You're off the team on this one. You sit it out, get your head together"

"What?" Clay frowns confused "Why? What you want me to sit here, and wait?"

"I don't care!" Jason comes back in his face "All I want you away from 's all I care."

"Jason! Jace, come on man. Please, don't do this. I need this"

Ray shakes his head but he tries "Jason man come on, the kid needs to do something?!" he tries "You can't just leave him here."

"I said he sits it out Ray! His heads not gonna be in it and that's no good to me or this team. You know that."

"Jason, come on 'll be fine. You can't do this."

Jason turns round and comes back at Ray he goes eye to eye "Watch me!"

Ray sighs and looks at Clay. He shrugs "Sorry man." he looks at him "I tried, look it won't do no harm for you sit this out. Jason's right, it probably is for the best, after everything. You need some time, get your head right."

" _BEST!?_ Best for who? And what about him, Ray. Is his head right?"

"Leave it man" Ray puts his hand on his chest and shakes his head sighing "He'll come around. Just give it some time." Ray says it but he's not actually sure if Jason will come around.

As the apartment goes quiet Clay drops to the arm of the chair. He has her hoodie in his hands. He can't get his head around what's happened.  
He stands up again putting his hand behind his head as he paces the room, trying to clear his head. His eyes fill with tears as he struggles to make any sense of what's gone on "Why? Why CJ .. Why did you do this?"

o-o-o-o -o-o-o

He's still sitting on the bed hours later staring out of the window. He's heard from no one. Well there's no one to hear from they are all gone. _They must be up in the air by now!_

Then he heads into the bathroom and washes his face and as he comes out he notices the room. The floor is in chaos with things, medical packets and papers. He starts to pick them all up including the brown empty medication bottle. He stands turning it over and over in his hand "Shit!"

He rubs his forehead trying to make sense of what to do next "I need a drink" he grabs his jacket and heads out pulling the door behind him.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o o

He's been at the bar drinking and it's gone from day to night and back to day now. He's a mess and he's not slept and hardly eaten, let alone washed.

He sits there checking old text messages from when they first got together. Smiling at the comfort and craziness of them. He laughs to himself at the ones telling him what she was going to do to him next times she sees him.

"Hey man" the bartender says "Isn't it time you went home?"

He looks at the time on his phone. They're still not back yet.  
"Yeah... you're right!" He necks the last tequila shot sitting beside his empty beer bottle. He's lost count of them now.

He starts to cry and he puts his hand to his eyes. _I need to get out of here!_

He staggers outside and leans against the wall. Then he starts to sob,uncontrollably. The pain is too much that he can't breathe.  
"What the hell am I going to do now?" he cries out wondering when Jason's going to let him back on the team.

He's shaking his head nothing makes sense anymore. He squats down with his back against the wall, trying to catch his breath, trying to calm himself. His chest hurts with a pain he can't describe and he buries his head in his hands.

He can hear the sound as his phone bleeps with a text. He registers the sound but doesn't look at it.  
Trying so hard to hold back his tears. Closing his eyes, pushing back against the wall he gulps and takes in one big breath trying to get a grip on the pain. Then he wipes the tears from his face and leans his head back on the wall putting his hands on the side of his head.

The text reminder bleeps again and he pulls the phone out of his pocket checking the text.

A frown comes over his head as he reads it. "I'm so Sorry x"


	18. Chapter 18

**Ray's Secret**

Clay stares at the screen, he's checked the message again, the date, the time. It was sent just now. He looks around, he's confused.  
"What the hell!" He rubs his head as he tries to think. Taking a breath, he starts typing a reply

Who is this?

C.J?

Where are you? What happened?

I need to see you

He hovers over the send button, then he deletes it. He thinks again. _This is madness! Who's sent this?_ He frowns.

C.J x

He sighs, starting at the screen, waiting. He keeps looking and willing a message _Nothing. No reply_.

He holds the phone to his chin as he thinks what to do. Who to contact? Who to tell _I need go home?_

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Back at his, he checks the text again, several times. He looks around the apartment, thinking back, about the scene, when he got here. After it happened. _What did everyone say?_

He has to think hard, shaking his head, going through it all, moment by moment. He's so tired that he can't think straight. He can't think through what happened. _Is she dead? Did she kill herself? Overdose they said._ He frowns. But no one actually said she was dead... I just assumed!

He rubs his head with his hands and lays back on the bed trying to make some sort of sense from all this. He checks the phone again. He's so exhausted that he closes his eyes and falls asleep.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

He wakes gurgling and choking. Someone pouring water into his mouth "Oh my god!" he starts to fight it _What's happening? Where am I?_

He opens his eyes to see Sonny's stood over him, pouring a large bottle of water in his mouth.

"Ya know I did think about strapping you down and doing it for real, but then that's highly illegal and frowned upon!" Sonny laughs. "Wake the hell up Clay. I need breakfast"

Clay shakes his head and pushes Sonny's hand away "You're back. Oh my god, how long have I been asleep?"

"I have no idea. I found you like this when I got here. Door was open, I let myself in"

"Where is she?"

Sonny looks confused "She who?" he frowns "Oh her. Yeah, I have no idea. You remember what happen right? You sober?"

"Where did they take her?"

Sonny shrugs "Who knows. I don't know what happened after they took her from here" He thinks for a minute "But you can bet she's somewhere nice and exclusive" he smiles "Five stars! And I'll bet, unlike me, she's got breakfast for sure. Plus, a bonus stash of happy pills by now!"

"You think she made it? " Clay looks at him wiping the water from his face

"I don't know. Who knows what happened? I know it was touch and go for a while. Davis and me, we did CPR till they arrived, but after they took her..." he shrugs "...who knows! She was still hanging in there when they left, that's all I know" He looks at Clay sitting there on the bed. He can see how hard he's thinking "Hey! All I do know, is that you need to leave it alone now"

Sonny tries to get his attention he snaps his fingers "Do you hear me? For your own sake, and hers"

"I need to see her."

"NO!" Sonny is so annoyed "No, you need to stop this, this obsession. You hear me?" He sees Clay looking at him "Jeez you know, I sound like a broken record keep repeating and you're not listening." He takes a sharp intake of breath "Look man, you need to accept she's gone. I guess we'll never know where, unless they want us too!"

"No. No, she's okay"

"Man, I know that's wishful thinking, but you don't know that for sure. Look, even with Miss Mandy with her clearance, she couldn't find out, and she tried. So there no way in hell they gonna tell you that's for sure."

He pauses "I know she is. I know, because I got a text!"

"A text!" Sonny laughs disbelievingly "Well dang me! So, Miss Mandy gonna be pissed, I mean all that sophisticated equipment the CIA have, and you get classified info by ...text!" He laughs, in disbelief "So.. what this text say then?"

"Just said, _I'm sorry_!"

"Clay you sure you're even sober? Did you fall hit your head or somethin' while we were gone?" he shakes his head "Okay look you need to let this go; you understand me. Lord how many times. What, you think you love her, Yes? Then you let her be. She needs help and not help you or any of us can give her" Sonny frowns just staring at him "Come on get yourself up I need breakfast"

Sonny pulls him up off the bed, he sniffs "But you need a shower first. You stink worse than me!"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Mandy's briefing them on the next op. They haven't been green lit yet, so she's just running the details. They're near to completing her list and they all let out a collective sigh. They're exhausted.

Jason's tired too, living in a world of his own, thinking about C.J. all the time.

"You okay man?" Ray frowns watching him.

"Yeah sure."

Ray sees his thoughts are far from this room "You have to let it go brother. Just think she getting the help she needs now"

"Yeah I know Ray, but I just can't help thinking I wasn't there for her. Didn't see where she was at. That she needed proper help" He looks at Ray frowning "After everything that happened I should've seen it. I mean no one could've coped with all that and still be okay. All I did was put more pressure on her"

"Hey man you weren't to know" he puts his hand Jason's shoulder "She's was always pushing it to the wire. You know that as well as me" he sighs "Just thank god Sonny got to her in time. Hopefully she'll be okay."

"Only thing I can do now is keep her safe." he sighs "Even if, like her father said before, I need to stay away." He nods, gesturing towards Clay. "He, on the other hand, he's gonna be harder to sort."

Ray nods "Yeah, but you're gonna let him back on the team, right?"

"Not yet. No, I'm gonna push his buttons a bit first. Check where he's at. See if he can keep it together. Just keep him busy, Ray!"

"Jason brother, maybe it would be better if you let him back, keep his mind focused. I know you don't like it but, the kids hurtin' as well. You sure you doing this for the right reasons? It's not his fault either"

"Like I say, just keep him busy!"

o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay's pissed. Every shit job or errand going is getting pushed his way for best part of three weeks now. He hasn't been included on one active duty and he's starting to get annoyed.

This is Jason's way of saying he's in charge, of punishing him. His way of dealing with his own frustrations, and now for some reason every extra training exercise he being sent on he being failed. _Something stinks of Jason in this!_ It's starting to get to him and making him train with Chalk team that just about caps it off.

"Hey Ray, wait up! So, you think Jason's gonna let me back on the team or is this how it gonna be now?"

Ray shakes his head "I don't know man just go with it for now" he sighs. "Clay, I feel sorry for you man, you know I do. But this is Jason, and we just have to wait till he works his way through it. We've all been there man. I know how it feels, I remember being outside Jason's circle, it hurts but... Look Clay it's just his way of keeping you distracted, keeping you busy"

"Keep me distracted!" he laughs and shakes his head "What and letting me back on active duty wouldn't?" he questions "Talk to him Ray make him understand, you know him better than anyone. He'll listen to you"

"I know it sucks man, but he'll come around, just in his own time. You know how Jason is"

"Yeah I know him, and what if he doesn't come around? Maybe, maybe I should just think about quitting instead" he walk away

Ray sighs he really feels for him. "Look Clay, Clay come back... Clay! Look, I'll try, try talking to him"

"Hey, what's up with you?" Sonny frowns

"Nothing!" Ray looks frowning at Sonny "Well nothing we can fix for now"

"Um.. nope, nope that's not the right answer and the correct answer is?"

Ray shake his head "I don't know. But I do know if Jason keeps pushing him, then I think he's gonna quit!"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

"Beer and Tequila Chaser!" Sonny rubs his hands and smiles "Oh how I've missed this."

Davis laughs "Sonny, you've only been gone a couple of days"

"Hell yeah, but you know how it is Davis, when you like honey and you put your finger in a good honey jar then you just wanna keep dipping it" he smiles at her "Beer and Tequila..." he leans and hushes his voice to a whisper "and you..." he smiles "are like that good honey jar!"

She smiles and blushes.

Jason's sitting at the table by himself. Ray's chatting between him and the rest of the guys positioned around the bar.

Jason's not really listening to any of their conversation, just sitting lost in his own thoughts

Clay's finished training, heading into the bar for a drink. He sees Jason who looks up at him and as he turns around to leave he hears Sonny call him " _SPENSER!_ ... Spenser come here! Oh, don't be shy... I got you tequila"

"I'm good thanks Sonny" he smiles awkwardly

"Oh, c'mon, come over here! " Sonny swipes a quick glance at Jason to gauge his reaction as Clay heads over towards them

"Alright" He nods at Sonny, then he turns to acknowledge Jason, finding that just plain blanks him. He sighs _Fine if that's the way you want it!_

After more than hour of this atmosphere between them Clay finally snaps "You know what? Fuck it!" he slams down the beer on the table  
"What the hell is your problem with me?"

He confronts Jason, much to Ray's disapproval as he tries to calm the situation down "Hey c'mon Clay leave it, not now. This isn't the right time or place"

"Good a place as any. I mean, how long is this going to continue? Am I getting back in the team or not?" Jason glances up but makes no attempt at a reply. Clay laughs at him "Fine have it your way" h

He walks away from the bar grabbing his jacket from his seat. Jason stands up "Have it my way?!" he rages "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means you're pushing this too far now, punishing me for something that's not my fault!"

"You wanna quit then?" Jason laughs "Are you are gonna be a quitter?"

Clay looks at him he's so angry he stares him in the eye "I'm not scared of you Jason. What is that what you want, you want me to quit"

"Well I don't want quitters on my Team. So, if you're going to quit then go right ahead"

Clay steps forward.

"Woah, there Blondie... hold up!" Sonny steps in and holds him back.

"Get off me Sonny!" he pulls himself free from Sonny's grip as he goes eye to eye with Jason "What you think I'll quit because of you?" he looks Jason up and down

"Thought you said he was at breaking point there Ray?" Jason smiles "Still looks like some fire there to me." he nods and pushes Clay in the chest. "You see, Ray seems to think you'll quit, is he right? Me, nah not so much. No, I think I'll have to push a bit more. What's your bet Sonny, is he ready to be a quitter?"

"Jason man don't do this" Ray steps in and tries to smooth it over

Clay bites his lip as he carries on staring at Jason. He suddenly let's out a laugh of annoyance "You told him what I said, Ray? You told him I would quit?"

"I didn't tell him that exactly. I asked him to ease up. Thought he was pushing you too hard all things considered"

Jason and Clay don't take their eyes off each other "Course he gonna tell me. What, you didn't thing him would? He's a TEAM guy, my number two! If he's got concerns about this TEAM of course he'll tell me" Jason's laughs still trying to push Clay "Though have to say he made a good case for ya and I nearly considered backing off...till now" he laughs

Clay's really pissed now "Team guy, really? You trust him more than anyone, right?"

"Number two man , so absolutely" Jason smiles "Always have and always will!"

"Yeah sure, your number two guy. Why wouldn't you ?" Clay smiles "Always got your back? Never go behind it?"

"Clay" Sonny's concerned, watching as Clay's mood changes. Ray looks and shakes his head "Clay man, don't go there brother!"

"Tells you everything does he? Except perhaps when he's is going behind your _back?_ "

Ray now steps between them "Clay man, don't do this, not now! Clay I'm begging you brother!"

Ray realises what might be about to happen as Jason pushes Ray aside and stands in front of Clay "You got something to say? Come on then let's hear it"

"Jason man leave it, let the kid be" Sonny tries to reason with him, calm it down, before something gets said that shouldn't

"No" Jason sneers "I wanna hear what he has to say, I mean, there's obviously something bothering him"

Clay bides his time. Ray's shaking his head. "Clay, please I'm begging man, don't do it!"

"Woah, there Poster Boy!" Sonny smiles and pushes him away "Let's not be getting ahead of ourselves. Hows a about a little time out there before you we do somethin' stupid eh?" He tries to hand him a drink, putting his arm round Spenser's neck trying to lead him away from the situation.

"No, you got something to say I wanna hear it?" Jason's in his face but calmer this time

"Trust me Jay, it's nothing. Just too much drink, talking foolish nonsense, aint that right?"

"No!" Clay shakes his head "No, actually I'm fine, I've not being drinking"

"Clay just let it go man, please" Ray stands in front of Clay but Jason moves him out the way

"No Ray, the kids obviously got his panties in a wad about somethin' so let's hear it" Jason's concerned now "C'mon, I'm waiting"

"You trust him, Ray, to tell you everything?" Clay smiles "Ask him then, ask him about CJ"

" _SHUT_ your mouth Clay! I'm warning ya," Sonny's so angry now as he realises what he's about to say, "You keep it zipped or I'll shut you up!"

Clay ignores him. Ray closes his eyes, as his heart beats faster "Clay, please don't!"

Jason's curious now. He can sense they're hiding something "I wanna hear it! NOW!"

"Ask him about that night, with her!"

"Night, what night?" Jason frowns

"That night you couldn't forgive her" Clay smiles. Jason doesn't look so in control now "Ask him, ask who she was with"

Ray closes his eyes he can't believe Clay's doing this. He shakes his head. "Clay please... don't do this man"

Jason turns and stares at him "You knew? All this time, you knew who she was with? I goddam asked you Ray. I asked you if you knew, you told me you didn't. Did you lie to me?"

"Jason man, please. Listen. I'm sorry okay. I..." He sighs again as he tries to explain "I um...I just need to let me explain"

Jason folds his arms "Oh, I'm listening. You got my full attention now!"

"Look man, it was nothin', just a stupid mistake. A one-off thing. It never happened again; I swear" he shakes his head "I'm sorry man!" Ray's really struggling with what to say "I know should have told ya... I know that, but I didn't see what good it would do. She'd gone anyway"

"What the hell are you talking about?" Jason's still confused

Clay smirks and laughs "Oh, you still don't get it do ya? That one night stand she had, the mistake you wouldn't forgive her for. Well can you forgive him?"

Jason frowns as Ray hangs his head in shame " Jason...it's like I said, it was a stupid mistake. If I could take it back I would, a million times over, I'm so sorry"

Jason's on the back foot now and he's angry. Clay's got the better of him and he steps forward in Rays face swiping his hand into a fist just in front of Ray's nose, without touching him. He can't speak as he shakes his head, his face full of anger and disappointment. "You know what, you disgust me" he takes a deep breath ""I gotta get out of here"

"Jason please..."

"Don't! Don't Ray!.. You just stay the hell away from me, I don't wanna hear it!"

Ray shakes his head, looking at Clay "JASON! Jason man, please." He sighs "Jason, what you gonna do? Where are you going?" he drops his head and with his hand he swipes the shot glasses off the table "Damn it! Why the hell did you have to do that Clay?"

Clay licks his lips thinking, he's slightly embarrassed. Now the moments over it doesn't feel as good as he thought it would. He got one over on Jason, but he hurt Ray, and that doesn't feel good at all.

Sonny's fuming "Well that was a damn stupid thing to do!" he looks at Clay disappointingly shaking his head "Fuck! Damn you Clay. What the hell did you go do that for?" Turning to look at Clay "You just couldn't leave it could ya?"

Clay gulps he suddenly realises he might have gone too far. "I'm sorry man" he frowns an apologetic look at Ray "But he just pushed me too far" he sits down in the chair at the table, dropping his head in his hands as he sighs.

"Jason pushes you too far and it's me has to pay the price? Yeah great man, thanks for that!" Ray's trying to think "And did you think, what if he decides to tell Naima? What then? Thanks for nothing, brother!" Ray grabs his jacket and pushes past Clay

Jason's still outside trying to make sense of everything the fact that Ray's lied to him all this time. That while he was hurting it was his best friend that slept with her _I can't believe you did that Ray!_

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Ray unlocks the door to his house. Naima stands with a blank look on her face. "You could have told me!"

She says shaking her head, arms folded just staring at him. His face drops and his heart pounds in his chest "I'm sorry baby I couldn't..."

She frowns watching the fear in his face "Are you alright honey? Hey, you know it doesn't matter, I guess it's not a big deal. I just wondered why you could pick up the phone and tell me Jason was coming for supper" she looks at him worried "Ray, are you sure you're okay?"

Ray realising his mistake. What he thought she was gonna say "Oh, yeah...phone...Yeah, Jason, supper yeah I should have phoned" he kisses her relieved "Yeah I'm sorry!"

Jason's standing behind her with his arms folded. He and Ray just stare at each other "Jason!" he nods acknowledging him. "Everything okay?"

"Yeah, everything's okay Ray. Naima and me, we've been talking"

They have dinner. Jason watches the kids eating and smiles. Ray can hardly eat his food he's so knotted up inside. Sensing something's wrong between the friends Naima sends them to the garden for a beer while she clears the table. She's hoping they will settle whatever the differences are they are having.

Jason sits on the table outside. He's quietly watching the kids playing through the door window. He can see how attentive Naima is them "You've got a nice family there Ray"

Ray wanders around to him. He sighs "I'm sorry man. It should have never happened. It was a mistake. I think every day I wish I could take it back, undo it. I know she does too. No one regretted it more than her" He take a deep breath in "So you gonna tell her, Naima, about my mistake?"

Jason sits quiet for quite some time. He doesn't answer

"Jace I need to know, are you going to tell Naima? I got a lot to lose here man!" He still gets no reply "Man, you know that wasn't me, you know that! I was drunk. I would _never_ do that to you on purpose. It was a stupid, drunken, mistake" He bites his lip and then continues to explain "There was a lot going on in my head, and look it's not excuse but we drank way too much, you know what she's like, hell what I was like. It just got out of hand and just happened. We never planned it. Jace I'm so sorry! But I need you to forgive me."

Jason's still thinking then he looks up at Ray and finally speaks "No! No, I'm not gonna tell her"

Ray lets out sigh of relief "Thank you brother"

Jason's rubbing his head "Oh Ray, what a mess" he sighs as he bites his lip and shakes his head. He looks to the sky "I'm tired Ray, just so very tired. You know I thought I was over this, over her." he sighs "This needs to end, now. I need to let her go"

***BLEEP! BLEEP! **** BLEEP! BLEEP!***

"SHIT" Jason sighs and rubs his hand across the tension on his forehead as he looks at his phone. They look at each other and Ray puts his hand out to pull Jason up. He smiles.

"We good?"

"Yeah, we're good!" Jason smiles

"And what about Spenser?" Ray looks at the phone "Jace, if you're serious, about letting this go, then fix things with Clay"

Jason scratches his chin and pauses deep in thought then he sighs "Okay, call the kid, Ray. Tell him to get his gear. And Ray... tell him not to be late!"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

48hrs later they find they find themselves off the coast of North Korea about deep dive to a submarine. And another nightmare is about to begin when Sonny becomes trapped in a flooded torpedo tube.

It's a life and death situation for the Team, but when they finally save Sonny, their team bond is made stronger and they realise, that despite everything, they are brothers. Their bond is deep and sometimes things will come along that test that bond. but they are strong and will survive. They are a team, and a family that not even C.J can break... or can she?


	19. Chapter 19

**The Gala Dinner**

**15 months later **

Blackburn enters the briefing room "Okay, heads up ladies, it's time to get your party gear on"

He smiles looking around the room at them all as they sit there looking confused "This includes you as well" he looks at Davis "To answer your confusion _we_ Gentlemen, we have an invitation." He smiles holding up a piece of paper "And I'm warning you now this is an exclusive event, a lot of cake eaters and various VIPs. So I'm recommending you dress for the occasion"

"Oh, great they rollin' us out for some meet and greet, yeah cos they're just always so much fun" Sonny rolls his eyes "Are we partying or we booked for the security detail? You know how those cake eaters can get out of hand" he laughs ".. after a few beers"

"No, we're definitely partying ladies, not working" Blackburn nods "And I can't impress on you how much you need to take this seriously. It's on behalf of the UN Ambassador's office. And the Gala room of the _Fairfax hotel_ has been booked"

They all look at each other and Sonny lets out a whistle "Wow now I am impressed. Man, that place is seriously expensive, they even got a private club in the basement, with poker tables. So, why we being so honored?"

"We've received special invitation, to acknowledge our part in the Nigeria hostage return, now that everything's been cleared. Other than that, I just know our presence was requested. They're putting out some PR on it, turning it into some sort of charity event"

"WOW!" Clay smiles "They really doing that for us, after all this time. Should we feel honored or worried?"

"Yeah Eric, sounds like they really rollin' out the red carpet on this thing. My guess is though,there will be no actual red carpet or recognition for us, right?" Jason smiles and they all laugh

"On that point you might correct Master chief. They will be skipping the actual recognition part, and I'm not sure about the red carpet but.. there is a comp bar so enjoy"

"Comp bar?" Sonny smiles "Now that sounds my kinda party. Hey, c'mon guys this could be fun right?"

"Hmmm! Yeah well let's just go easy on the free beer okay, keep in mind the cake eaters will be watching" Blackburn has his reservations about putting Sonny and a free bar together with Navy brass for the night " Oh and don't forget, what I said, smart dress, gentlemen...so keep it tidy!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The night of the Gala Dinner and they all meet outside the hotel

"God I feel so stupid dressed like this" Sonny's already complaining, pulling at the stiff collar on his dress shirt.

"Oh, I don't know" Clay smiles "I thought you looked rather attractive" he winks, adjusting Sonny's tie " Hey Sonny, just keep thinking about that comp bar while they torture us with small talk" he laughs

"Yeah it's alright for you GQ you fit right in" he's pulling at his shirt collar "I am a tier one operator, with a reputation to uphold and being in a suit does _not_ fit my image" Sonny frowns "Remind me again why we're here?"

Davis arrives wearing short black, sparkle dress and heels. "Hot dang Davis you scrub up well" Sonny smiles. He can't keep his eyes off her, he also can't wait to get this over now and get back to the hotel room he booked.

"Why thank you kind sir" she laughs, blushing as she does a twirl in front of the guys "You like it?"

"Sure do!" he smiles " Let me accompany you pretty lady, this way" he holds out his arm and whispers in her ear, "and that outfit will look great on the floor laters, when I get you back to the hotel"

Jason takes a deep breath as they enter the spectacularly large Gala room. It's a really impressive sight, with the Grecian style balustrade around the gallery balcony that overlooks the main event room, and a huge glass chandelier hanging down from the high ceiling.

Looking around taking it in Jason checks out the surroundings "Wow! " he whistles "This sure is fancy, can see why there are so many cake eaters here, making the most of all the comp stuff. Hey.." he frowns "so how come we didn't get a room to stay in? I heard someone in the lobby say they were staying"

"It's booked out" Blackburn smiles "Cake eaters got there first"

"Oh, so we're here so they can applaud us for our great work, but without them actually saying thanks, and we can't get a room. That's great" Sonny frowns

Jason nods "Still, it makes them feel better about themselves, and on the plus side, they do have free food and beer" he laughs as he already picks up a bottle of beer from the extensive bar "I see the Navy have spared no expense on this little jolly" He takes some time, looking around trying to pick out faces he recognizes. Part of him wondering why he's actually here as this is really not his type of event.

He spots some high ranking officials and VIP guests that he has seen before But as usual his SEAL mind is working overtime, making mental notes as he notices the security detail, or lack of, and the possible security breaches. Where he would hit, if he were making an assault on the place, a bad habit of his, he'd admit, but it passes the time at these types of events.

The team split up starting to mingle around the room. Jason notes the people Blackburn's talking to, _Diplomats_ he guesses. The room is full of them and various ranked, military personnel. The ones he doesn't recognize are _UN charity officials_ , Davis briefs him.

He suddenly drawn to turn around, frowning at the sound of an old recognizable voice calling out to him "Jason Hayes! I don't believe it. How are you?"

Jason swings around, finding the direction and who the voice belongs to. He rolls his eyes as its owner comes into his view "Christian Castle?!" he smiles. He takes a deep sigh in as he notices Ray frowning at him "Ship Commander, US Navy and complete douche bag" he groans, whispering under his breath. "You remember that time in Libya?"

Ray smiles "Oh yeah, yeah now I remember. That him?" he nods while continuing to drink his beer.

"Christian!" Jason acknowledges, grimacing under his fake smile "It's been a long time."

"Jason, yeah jeez, must years since..oooo let me think, that's right Libya was the last time. Gave you a helping hand, picking you up from the ocean and giving you a ride home, if I remember?"

"Yeah " Jason rolls his eyes "guess it was sort of like that. Oh um... this is Senior Chief Perry... Ray. He's on my team. You might remember him also "

" Yeah I think I remember you now. Well it's good to see you again" He and Ray shake hands "So how are things, busy? And what about Jason Hayes how's he now?" he looks around "Here alone?"

"Oh, not alone, the rest of my team is here" Jason smiles

"But um... no woman, right?"

Jason shakes his he head "Nope just me"

"Still..." Christian looks around "...there's a good choice in here tonight, if you were in the market" He smiles casting another gaze around the room. He takes a deep breath "Collected a few numbers myself this evening" he sips from his drink as he winks at Jason "...just joking. I wouldn't wanna step on the toes of you special operators', after all you have your reputations as being _players_ to uphold" he laughs

Jason drinks his beer and has to look away _Yup still a douche._ Ray smiles.

"It's been a great turnout, good time for some brown nosing you know making some contacts" he winks "Oh and of course... good for the charity I suppose" he smiles "Actually, my wife has gotten quite involved helping out with this one. Suppose it gives her something to do while I'm a way" he chews his cheek thinking "Keeps her out of mischief" he laughs "if you know what I mean"

 _"WIFE!"_ Jason splutters,nearly choking on his beer "Wow! Someone married you. Well, I am impressed. Gotta say, never had you as the settling down type, well you never came across as the _one_ -woman type really"

"I know, can hardly believe it myself sometimes. I mean, who'd have thought, Christian Castle off the market. I think the ladies here tonight are kinda disappointed " he laughs "But yep it's true, I tied myself down. Was a crazy couple of nights in Vegas for sure. Went drinking and woke up Boom!...Married."  
He takes a long drink from his glass "Mind turns out after, that as well as a great body, she came with a few added perks!" He winks "so was no need to hurry the divorce. Plus, her old man likes me"

 _Can't believe some woman married this idiot!_ Ray just keeps looking at Jason and smiling he can read his mind. "Well um... she must be some special woman to have managed to bag you for keeps" Jason sarcastically replies. Ray doesn't know where to look and chokes on his mouthful of beer.

"Well, what can I say. Oh, she's a pretty feisty little thing but um... being married, it's all about keeping them under control of the reigns, and um...keeping your cell phone password protected" he laughs "To be honest I think her dad was just glad someone could get a grip on her. I think he would have paid me to keep her."

Jason and Ray roll their eyes at each other.

"So, Ray, it was Ray wasn't it? You married?"

"Yes. Yes, I am, and two children" Ray takes a picture from his wallet to show him.

"Oh wow! Two. That's fantastic you must be so proud? I love kids, they give you a grounding, connect family with a bond. We um... we have one. A boy he's about eleven months now. We're trying for another."

"Really? Woah, that's a quick turnaround. I know we didn't even consider a second for quite a while"

"Woah" Jason frowns "That certainly was a couple of nights in Vegas"

Ray looks away smiling, he fears he may laugh out loud if he even just looks at Jason "Um.. you know excuse me a minute. While you exchange baby chat. I'll just grab another beer"

Jason excuses himself, taking the opportunity to grab another drink _I'm gonna need a few more of these if I have to listen to him much longer._ _  
_Rubbing the aching frustration from his head, he takes his time, scanning around the room to see where the rest of his team are. He looks back to see Ray willing him to come back. _Yep you were a douche back in Libya, and you still are now._

Christian looks around as he moves nearer to Ray, he leans in close lowering his voice "You know technically..." making sure no one else is listening "between you and I. The kid we have, well he's not mine, not in the biological sense. That's why I'm hoping to remedy the situation, add to the brood. I wanna get her knocked up before I go on deployment next month" he looks around and coughs "Her old man is besotted with his grandson so...would be final seal on the deal if I gave him one too" he winks

Ray frowns. _This guy is a complete reptile_. He looks up just as Jason comes back, bringing another beer for Ray "Thanks Brother, I need this" he sighs, raising his eyebrows in frustration. Jason smiles. Both of them on the same page in their appraisal of Christian

"Oh Jason, didn't tell you I've got Vice Captain post starting next month. If it all goes well, then I'm hoping to pull a few strings and get my own ship command next year" he smiles as he finishes up the rest of the drink in his glass." So how are you Jason ? Team stuff still busy? No plans for promotion"

"Oh... no I'm good. Like things the way they are. You know... don't like too many changes"

He turns and looks at the woman standing chatting to the side of them. He notices her long dark hair, tied in a long sleek ponytail. Wearing fitting black pants, sheer black shirt and really high heels. She looks pretty stunning and Jason's eyes wander all over her.

Christian smiles watching him "Oh...I see you've spotted her" he smiles again "Jason..." he grabs the woman by the waist ". let me introduce my wife"

"This should be interesting" Ray whispers to Jason

"Catherine! Catherine, my darling" he calls to her "Sweetheart, come here. Meet an old friend of mine" he smiles as he pulls her around " Jason this is my wife, Catherine"

His hand on her waist drops to her butt as he turns her round to greet them. She turns, drinking from a wine glass to say hello and stands still, just staring in shock "Oh um... Jason" she smiles confused "Wow um... this is a surprise"

"CJ" he gasps, unsure how to reply. He looks around, checking Ray's expression which is just as stunned.

Christian frowns confused, watching their reactions to each other "Oh, do you two know each other?"

"Um...yeah, yeah we um..." she smiles awkwardly "it was a while back. A um ...a work thing" she sighs, scratching her head unable to explain more convincingly

"Oh...oh of course" Christian clicks his fingers "that's right didn't you two have a bit of thing for each other or was that just a rumor" he coughs. He now smirks at Jason, putting his hand on her neck running it down her arm then the purposefully stroking it around her breast before resting finally on her waist, pulling her tight to his side "Sorry, but I'm afraid she's all mine now" he kisses her "Isn't that right babes"

Jason and Ray look away, embarrassed for her. She awkwardly adjusts position, distancing herself. Jason can see she uncomfortable being anywhere near him. He squeezes her tighter around the side of her body, her ribs, pulling her back into place next to him.

She grimaces slightly, trying to cover it with a smile. But Jason notices her discomfort "You still get pain there?" he frowns

"Um ...yeah, now and again. Not much" she smiles at him, as Christian tightens his grip. It does hurts, he knows exactly where, and he smiles at Jason. Reluctantly seeing his obvious concern for her he lets her go. "So, how are you Jason?" she smiles again

"Good!" he nods as he drinks from his beer, a noticeably awkward atmosphere surrounds them. Ray gives a small cough trying to break the tension.

Christian looks around, towards the bar. The glass in his hand now empty "Oh Catherine, there's your Father. I just need a quick word, about next month's posting. If you'll excuse me. Jason, Ray, I need to speak to Admiral Lewis" he kisses her cheek then turns to leave, "I'll leave you in Jason's capable hands. But remember I'm always watching you, so behave" he laughs.

"Yeah sure" She sighs as she nods to acknowledge his comment.

"Jason.." he shakes his hand " good to see you again. We must catch up with a beer sometime, perhaps swap some notes" he winks, glancing at CJ direction and laughs "soon I promise"

"Yeah, yeah I'm sure we will" Jason rolls his eyes. _Not._ He now turns to face CJ on her own "Oh my god, how the hell did you get with that vermin?" Jason shakes his head. confused.

She shrugs "Would you believe me if I said a drunken night in Vegas." she laughs "It's not so bad, he's away at sea a lot of the time, or out kissin' ass"

Ray's feeling awkward standing between them and he makes his excuse to leave "Look, I'm gonna get another beer and get Sonny away from that goddamn buffet." he smiles " C.J, nice to see you again"

"You too Ray"

"So..." Jason smiles at her "how are you really? After everything"

"Better now" she nods, apprehensive. She's nervous being here with him. She looks around, she can see her father, disapprovingly watching them and she coughs "Well um... this awkward"

"Hey boss...Sonny interrupts "You know they got all this comp barbecue food and ….. " his voice trails off as he notices who the woman is "What in god's name!" His mouth drops open as he looks at the both of them. He's confused "See I said it, she is, she's a goddamn supernatural, she just appears out of nowhere"

"Sonny" she smiles, acknowledging him

"Well..." he sighs looking at her "I gotta say, you sure as hell look better than the last time I saw ya"

"Thanks" she nods and smiles "And Sonny, thanks for everything you did that day"

Christian's back, grabbing her at the waist "Excuse me gentlemen, as much as I'd love you to have my wife" he smirks "I need to borrow her back for a while" he tightly grips the top of Catherine's arm to pull her away. She wriggles, loosening her arm from his grip.

Jason frowns, drinking from his bottle as he watches them interact with each other. He's really not keen on the way he behaves towards her, the derogatory remarks and the controlling mannerisms CJ can tell from the look on his face and reluctant for there to be a scene she excuses herself "Sure..I'll come now" she nods "Jason, Sonny, excuse me. I'll catch up with you all later no doubt"

"Okay.." Sonny frowns turning to look at Jason "So, who the hell is that dickwad"

"Would you believe.." Jason laughs" if I said it was her husband!"

Sonny raises his eyebrows "Her _what?!_ How the hell did she meet him? I mean...woah! C'mon that's gotta be a drunken night in Vegas, right? Her marrying someone like that. She had to be wasted surely"

"Pretty much I think " Jason shakes his head, laughing again as they stand watching as he now proceeds to garner the attention of Admiral Lewis. Jason frowns watching Lewis patting him on the back and smiling. They exchange glances once or twice it's clear that for some unbelievable reason the Admiral actually likes him

"Well.." Sonny smiles " I can see what he gets out of that marriage but what the hell does she get?"

"A lot of long lonely nights while he's away at sea, I guess?"

"True" Sonny laughs "Well, there's a positive. Anyway .. back to this buffet barbecue, come see. You know I'm' gonna suggest we get one to Blackburn"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Oh my god!" Davis whispers to Sonny as she sees him filling up his plate again "Do you know, I think I saw C.J, and her father, over there"

"Yeah you did"

"I did " she frowns "And does Jason know?"

"um hmmm" the barbecue chicken wing hanging from his lips "You know we should get one of these barbecue stations, back at base"

"So…" Ray frowns at he joins them "We talkin' about what I think we are?"

"umm hmmmm"

"Yeah well I was thinking, where's Spenser?" Ray looks around the room concerned

"I don't know" Sonny shrugs " I saw him earlier, some group of ladies he was tellin' tall tales to. Why?"

"Well um... with um... you know who here. I just think that maybe... we need to um... keep an eye on him."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Speeches are being made and most of the main crowds of guests are gathered around the temporary stage by the large curtained windows.

Clay's standing alone with his beer in hand. His eyes searching around trying to find any of Bravo in the room, he hasn't seen them for a while. As he scans around again, someone else catches his attention, and he can't stop staring "Oh my god... C.J!"

She's talking to a group of uniforms, and he watches as she sips from the large glass of wine in her hand. He smiles and as he does her eyes catch his. She smiles, nodding to acknowledge she's seen him . He raises his beer. _She looks great! God, I'd forgotten how great._

Speeches are finishing and the music starts to play and uses the opportunity to work his way over towards her. As he moves from where's hes standing he collides into someone "Sonny! Hey man what you up to?"

"I was um... I was gonna show you this barbecue buffet "

"Oh yeah, I've seen it man, you know I was just gonna speak to someone"

"Yeah I know what you wus just gonna do" he frowns "But I can assure you, her _husband_ won't be non-impressed"

Clay looks up staring at him confused "Her _husband_? What the hell?"

"That's right! He's some right jerk off, ship Captain" he leads Clay away, steering him to the other side of the room "So, we'll just go over here, out the way. We don't want a scene in front of all these nice people now do we."

o-o-o-o-o-o

CJ.s in the hallway on the upper floor, looking out over the galleria balcony, down onto the packed Gala room below. She's staring, drinking for from the crystal glass she has in her hand, watching the various array of guests, mingle below. She can even see Christian, still talking with her father. She lets out a long sigh taking another sip from the whiskey.

She shakes her head "Jeez, I hate these things" she closes her eyes, sighing "Just one more she looks in her glass and sighs "should get me through. Cheers asshole" she laughs as she knocks back the last of the drink.

"Thought you'd be off drink for life after everything"

A voice behind, startles her. It's familiar and as she turns around, smiling at him "I should be really, but um...these events, they are stressful enough without not drinking" she smiles as they stare at each other eye to eye

"How are you?" Clay asks, flashing on of his adorable smiles at her

"Better" she smiles back. " A lot better"

The corridor fills with guests, coming towards them, laughing and joking and they move to the side by the wall.

Then there are more voices, some Naval officers in their full uniforms and they approach her "Ah Catherine, we were looking for you" he frowns at Clay "Your um.. your _husband_ asked us to find you. Make sure that you were okay"

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine. So, you can report back, say I'll be down in a minute. I'm just catching up with an old friend"

"Okay" The officer glares looking at Clay again "I'll tell him, you'll join him in a minute, Nice to meet you" he puts his hand out an shakes Clay's hand.

She frowns "Look it's not a good idea, us getting seen together here?"

He looks up and down the corridor he pulls her arm "C'mon then. " He opens the door to one of the bathrooms on the upper floor and pulls her inside, locking it

"And this is a better idea?" she frowns " getting caught in here. No, sorry Clay I need to get back... I'll be missed"

"I just wanted somewhere to talk, in private, just for a minute"

"No, no I'm not doing this okay. I'm going" she looks at him and puts her hand to unlock the door "It's good seeing you Clay, but this ...this is its stupid. I have to go!"

He bites his lip. He knows she's right "Okay, yeah you're right. I just wanted to say Hi. That's all " He smiles and unlocks he door. But as he opens it to let her out, they both here a loud crack of a bang go off.

Recognizing the sound they both look at each other "What the hell was that?" Clay frowns as more of the same rapid loud sounds follow, as they stand still puzzled.

"That's gunfire."

He shakes his head "Gunfire. But it can't be" They stand quiet, listening as another rapid stream of shots ring out "Oh my god.. it is!"

They concerned and he slowly opens the door, just slightly as they hear the sound of people screaming "What the hell's going on?"

.


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter 20: The hostages**

"What the hell's going on?"

"I have no idea" Clay nervously frowns as he checks in the gap of the open doorway. Closing it quickly he leans against it to keep it tightly shut "But it's probably best if we don't stay here"

"I um... I have a room upstairs, second floor" she suggests "plus I have my gun, in my case up there. The stairwells are at the end of this corridor"

"Okay" he takes a breath trying to think this through "Okay we'll head there, and then assess the situation. I'm gonna call Jason, see if he has more of a sitrep. " They're both anxious both breathing heavily, she has this nervousness and they smile at each other "Jason, it's Clay. Where are you?"

"Clay, where the hell are you? You got any idea what's going on?"

"I don't know we're up on the balcony floor" Clay cracks the door open again and out. He can see across the far side of the galleria "Oh, okay I see you, you're just across from where we are"

"We? Who's we?"

"CJ, she's um .. she's here with me. She was in the corridor when the shots went off. She says she has a room on second floor" 254 she mouths to him "254, we're about to head there"

"Okay, I'll gather the others and we'll meet you there... Spenser, be careful we have no idea what's going on here"

The floors on the hotel go around in a square with elevators in the middle and two main stairwells either end, leading to all floors. And they use the one nearest them to, cautiously, make their way to her room.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Eric what's happening, where are you?" Jason rubs his head as he now calls Blackburn

"Jason, I've been evacuated out of the building. I was outside getting some air. I can't get access back inside" he looks around as people scatter in all directions "From the little I saw we have mulitple armed tangos. I'd estimate, from quick visual eight to ten with control of the lobby and Gala room. Json I'm not much use here so I'm gonna return to base, set up a command room and coordinate with you from there"

"Copy that. We gonna need some equipment and gear, some weapons. I'll let you know what once we have a further sitrep"

"Okay, Jason ... Davis and Trent, they were still in the gala room. I saw them before I left."

"Copy that" he sighs "for now the only comms we have are cell phones"

"Alright, once I get command established I'll get back to you, asap"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

C.J goes to her luggage and takes her gun case from inside. She hands Clay the weapon "Sorry, guess that's all we have for now."

There's a light knock at the door and Clay let's Jason, Ray and Sonny inside "Okay so what do we know so far?"

"Okay, according to Blackburn's quick visual assessment we have approximately eight to ten armed tangos with control of lobby and Gala room." he sighs " There are some pretty important people in that room down there and my guess is this well-planned 'd have been more gun fire, or explosions if this was random terrorist nut jobs making a name for themselves. Blackburn's setting up command and gonna get back to us when he has more"

They're all thinking, and the room has gone quiet Jason looks up at CJ "What do you know about the people in that room? we got any V..I ...VIPs? Anyone someone would go after specifically"

"Um.. specifically, I mean anyone of a number there would be on potential hit list for various organizations but no one who stands out as a prime target " she rubs her head thinking "its um... mainly military personnel. Then few peripheral diplomats and other standard admin personnel... Oh the UN commissioner he didn't attend but it was known he wasn't well in advance"

"Okay, so who we are looking at being most senior ranking in there. Anyone specific on that score"

"Oh um... " she closes her eyes trying to think "Probably um... I mean, Admiral Cage and Fleet Commander Jones …" she shrugs "and oh and of course my Father, Admiral Lewis" she sighs as she looks at them all listening "I mean, they're the most senior ranked military personnel"

"What about Davis and Trent did they get out do we know?"

"No Sonny, according to Blackburn, they're still in there, hey, don't worry we're gonna get them out"

They all sit on the floor of the room. They're waiting for Blackburn to call back. They need the green light and after what seems a lifetime he finally calls Jason's' cell phone "Eric ... what you got for us?"

"Okay so, so far intel is very limited. We've got no proper numbers, or who. But the I've got the green light for you to go on this, so what do you need from me?"

"We're gonna need some gear...radios, weapons. Main problem is how we're gonna get it. They're gonna have the lower floors and stairwell are guarded"

Clay looks out the window "How about the roof?" he looks up "Like you say they gonna cover the lower floors, the way this hotel is laid out, then it's pretty much no one in or out. It would be too thin spread to cover all floors though so what if we go to the roof?"

"yup but how that gonna help? "Sonny frowns "I mean, how's Blackburn gonna drop it without getting seen"

"Well with all the news crew choppers out there, we can use it as cover, then all we gotta do is retrieve it"

"Yep, yeah that sounds like a plan" Jason agrees "Ray... you, Sonny, Spenser make your way to the roof. You take that weapon, it's all we have right now"

"No wait" C.J rummages under the bed for Christian's luggage "His pistol" she pulls out

"Okay" Jason nods " It's better than nothing, I'll keep that here with us we need to get a sitrep of what's going on downstairs, I'll take CJ with me"

Sonny undoes his jacket and tie off, undoes his shirt buttons rolls his sleeves up "Remind me next time you take me to a party to come dressed my way"

"Eric... alright here's the plan, the team are on the way to the roof. Let me know when the gear is on its way"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

C.J emptying her suitcase onto the bed. She takes out some black combats, her sneakers and a lycra vest top

"What the hell are you doing?" Jason frowns looking puzzled

"I'm changing my clothes, I can't be involved in a hostage situation wearing this outfit, it's not exactly practical" She strips off to her pants and pulls her combats on then as she's about to unbutton her shirt she stops "Turn around"

"Turn around? " Jason frowns as he watches her "What do you mean turnaround?"

"I mean turnaround!" she laughs "Jason...just turn around, don't look while I get changed "

"C.J are you serious, the amount of times we've...well you know" he shakes his head "..and now...you want me to turnaround?"

"YES! Yes, I want you to turnaround, look Jason, we're not seeing each other now and so... " she sighs

"Okay.. alright " He does as she asks and turns his back " I'll turnaround ..she has to be kidding right." he shakes his head He may have turned around but now he watches her in the mirror on the wall opposite, he can't help it. He just loves looking at her. She takes off her shirt and then her bra, pulling the vest over her head. He can see her bare skin in the mirror, and he frowns as he notices that her back and sides are covered in red bruising.

"Okay, all done. You can turn back now" she smiles if nothing else she knows she's annoyed him. He puts his hands on her shoulders and she shrugs him away "Jason…don't"

"Don't! No, you don't... " He pulls the side of her top up to revel her side "you do you do tell me what this is about?"

"What?" She pulls her top down "It's nothing!"

"C.J don't bullshit me" he turns her round and lifts her chin "Did he do that to you? Castle. You know, I saw him, saw how he had hold of earlier. So, did he do this?"

"No! Not exactly, Oh, don't worry about it... it's fine. I must have knocked it. It bruises easy these days"

"CJ that's bullshit and you know it. Why would _you_ cover for that asshole?"

She doesn't look at him but pulls her top down further, shaking him away from her "Right I'm ready are you?" She ties her hair back into a ponytail

Jason's shaking his head and inside he is seething, even though she denies it he knows that Castle has hurt her. "We're coming back to this conversation. I'm not letting this go!" he shakes his head "Alright, let's go!"

They both head back down to the galleria floor

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They silently sit by the wall in the dark. They can just make out the Gala room below. Jason's phone vibrates he whispers, "Eric. What you got for me?"

"Jason... It's a bureaucratic bullshit nightmare up here at the moment. Everyone jockeying to be in charge. There are some seriously important people at that function so I'm doing the best I can to get a hold on things"

"Are they aware that we're on site?"

"Not yet I'm waiting till I see what the chain of command is first before I let them in on that fact, but in meantime send me the list of exactly what you need"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"What are they doing?" Jason comes back to where C.J is watching to the floor below it's all dark, except the dim light of the emergency lighting as the outside authorities have cut the power to the main building and room floors

"They seem to be organising the hostages." she whispers in hushed tones. They've split them into men and woman. It looks as though they know what they're doing. Whoever it is they've either done this before or have insider information. They know, to contain that many hostages for any amount of time is not without complications" she looks at Jason "So, looks like they're pulling out some key people they wanna keep"

"Him!" Jason nods "Him with the beard. He seems to be the big cheese in charge. He looks like he's the one giving orders" Jason lays down next to her on the floor where they're quietly watching between the pillars on the balustrade. "What you think terrorist group trying to make a statement? or something more political and organised? There are some big military names down there"

"I don't know seems really well organised for just a random terror group. This seems more specific. I get the impression they're gonna ask for something specific or someone"

Jason sits up again and leans himself against the wall thinking. C.J lays on her stomach to get closer to look. peeping over the edge of the balcony. There about twenty men to the side by the women. CJs attention is distracted as she spots her father among the hostage group being sectioned to one side as they start pushing other people forward out of the larger group.

"They look like they're choosing who they want. Him with the beard, watch! Yeah, he's definitely looking for someone"

Then suddenly there's a lot of shouting and a panic in the room ensues as they open the main doors to the gala room and start herding the men out. Some are resisting at having to leave wives and partners behind.

"What are they doing now?" Jason lays beside her again

"I don't know? They're letting some of them go" she frowns "They're narrowing it down the one they're keeping people they know the authorities will want to negotiate for. The high value targets. Makes the hostages easier to handle and less chance someone plays hero. But again, that's insider information to know who to keep. They've picked all the ones from that group that I would have chosen" There are thirty or so men in the group left now and she notices Christian is one of them

"There any connections, with who they've picked out? You got any ideas I mean; you know these people better than anyone" Jason gets a photo and sends to Blackburn

"No connection I can think of so far. Apart from the fact they're all the highest ranked here and that they know who they're targeting" she frowns "Looks like they're doing the same with the women now"

Jason spots Davis as one of the hostiles stands near where she is "Go past! Just go past" Jason's willing him to let Davis go as the tango stops and nudges the woman next to Davis pushing her to one side.

The woman starts to scream and cry "Please, please I'm pregnant please don't. Please don't do this!" she's sobbing and making a lot of noise as the bearded guy walks over and slaps her

"Shut the hell up and do as you're told!"

She can't and just keeps crying. Davis tries to calm her "It'll be fine...just do as they say, and it will be fine! You just need to stay calm" but the woman is so upset and scared, shaking uncontrollably and still crying. "Take me instead" Davis frowns staring at the guy as he looks at her

The bearded guy looks her up and down staring. eventually fed up with the crying noises from the pregnant woman he nods in agreement and they push Davis to the side with the smaller group of women.

"Shit what the hell's she doing?" Jason frown he leans up to look

"Jason.. " she pulls him back down afraid he might be seen "She made a good call. Davis is trained that woman isn't. Davis did the right thing. Hey, you know I'd have done the same thing right?" She smiles.

He nods "Yeah I know!"

She puts her hand on his arm. "You'll get her back. We'll get her back"

The bearded guy is now going up and down the group of women and the other hostiles are shaking their heads. Suddenly he fires a gun in the air. After the initial high-pitched screams quiet down, he begins to shout "I am looking for someone, and I believe she is here. Where are you, Catherine LEWIS!"

C.J looks at Jason in shock

"Ms Lewis if you are in this room you need to make yourself known. So, others don't get hurt"

All the women let out a collective sigh before they quietly sob, nervously looking at each other as they try desperately to stay silent

Then another gunshot rings out. "QUIET!" he screams out

"Ladies...please. I want to help you all get out of here safely, but for that to happen I need to find who I'm looking for so please.. just give her up now or if you know where she is, then it's in your best interest to point her out to my men. Do you understand?" he pauses and looks around the nervously tense room "Give me what I want, and you can go free .. you have my word"

There's still silence.

"No? ... So, you're not going to show yourself to me Catherine?" he pauses "Very well, your choice. The consequences are on you"

They start to file the remaining woman to the other side of the room checking each one they all shake their heads.

Not finding what they're looking for Ashraf the main guy with the beard calls out to the large man nearest to Admiral Lewis "Bring him"

CJ's father is brought to the front of the room. Ashraf smiles "Where is she?" as expected the Admiral doesn't answer "I said, where is she? Where is your daughter?"

He still won't answer and now Christian steps forward "She's not here"

"What's he doing? "C.J looks confused as he turns looking at Jason

"I don't know. But whatever it is it doesn't seem a good thing"

"She won't have left the building. Search for her want her found"

They clear the other women out of the main doors. Soon the really large room is cleared with only around sixty of the original hostages remaining

Jason leans back, thinking he's puzzled by the specific request for CJ "Why do they want with you?"

"I don't know" she shrugs

"Come on C.J, seriously, you must have some idea what this is all about? Is this something to do with before. before when they took you? What the hell is goign on why are you such a target? You need to start beign honest with me, because people are being put at risk over whatever this is, including my team. Now why is he asking specifically for you?"

Jason's phone buzzes "hey boss its Ray we got the drop. We're now making our way back down to you."

"okay thanks Ray .. Ray be advised you may have hostiles on route. We've got a bit of a situation down here."

C.J nudges Jason" LOOK!" she points as she recognises one of the hostage takers

"Reagan!" Jason sighs "What the fuck is going on here?"

She shakes her head and sighs. She leans back with her head against the wall as she anxiously bites her lip

"okay c'mon CJ What the hell are you not telling me?"

She closes her eyes and sighs again. She looks at Jason and the she decides that she may have to trust, trust him and explain some things  
"I think it's to do with the list!" she sighs " The list that Mandy acquired, of the other part of the list"

Jason frowns watching her "What's this and you, got to do with those lists? We already retrieved most of the targets on the list. Where you one of them I know your name was on there"

She sighs and takes a breath rubbing her head in her hands before speaking "Kind of. What Mandy has, it's um.. it's just part of the list. My father and I we um..." she swallows " we were the ones put the list together. But the other parts, the other lists they're much more valuable. The contain the names of... of people, people higher up the chain" she pauses again "Oh god I really shouldn't be telling you this. Jason this could put you in harm's way and I never, never wanted that. But you're right you do need to know some of it" she sighs "is a list of .. officials, officers, connected people who are um ... you know, taking bribes, selling arms, adjusting arms contracts for sales of weapons, under the radar weapons shipments...Jason this went a lot higher than some drugs cartel payments, and a few rogue agents"

"What the hell?" he frowns at her

"Obviously, people on those lists, they want them and anyone who knows the details silenced .My um.. my father found out when they tried to recruit him, they needed his authorisation on a contract they tried to force him to sign, a large weapons shipment. Thats where it started with them threatening me so um... so he started do delve deeper into it" She leans her head back on the wall. "It got my mother killed...it's gonna get me killed" she shakes her head and rubs her chin

"So why didn't your father act on the list take it where it needed to go? Get these people stopped!"

She closes her eyes with her head still leaned on the wall "because, because we still haven't worked out how far up this goes. We were never sure where the top of the chain was" she turns and looks at Jason "Jason none us knows how many or who is involved in this"

"So where is the list now?"

She bites her lips she's not sure she should tell him "It's safe., it's on a flash drive"

"You've got it?"

she takes a moment. She looks sideways at him. "Yeah, yeah its safe. No one knows where"

He nods and pulls her towards him and puts his arm round her. They're both now starting to feel tired and they close their eyes for a few moments as they just hold each other

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The rest of BRAVO arrive back from the roof. They have weapons and radios now. Once changed and geared up Sonny smiles "That sure as hell feels better" Sonny says as he pulls a black t shirt over his head and puts in his earpiece in.

It's all quiet on the lower deck and they all sit around on the floor just taking a moment. CJs starting to feel tiredness creeping in again. She sighs and rubs her head.

Jason can see the tiredness and he smiles at her. He looks checking down on the ground floor where he spots Christian sitting by the wall "So how you meet that creep anyway?"

She frowns "Who Christian? I told you" she laughs "Vegas! I wasn't joking" she smiles.

"Seriously god knows what happened all I remember is we partied hard, he bought me drinks I must have passed out somewhere woke up, and had a ring on my finger and the guy I married guy in my bed " she frowns "

"We um.. got talking the next morning, he said he was in the Navy" she sighs "Several more drinks and well, we clicked, we had fun and we said we'd give it a go. Hey even my father liked him. He was good fun Jason. Well in the beginning." She sighs "Then things changed. He sucked up to my father, got a promotion. My father thought he was doing well to keep me in check, after everything. That he got me to .. behave."  
She shakes her head "It was just easier than the consequences, the fighting it just couldn't continue, I didn't want all the fighting . For some reason my father couldn't see him for what he was. There was some connection they had. When all I could see was he was playing him for his promotion"

"So, when'd he start with his fists?"

she shakes her head and closes her eyes "it wasn't really like that. I mean it's not like I don't fight back, right" she smiles" He'd get jealous... that's all! I mean you know better than most How I can push people's buttons. So..." she laughs "...we started to argue and fight a lot the fights just got bigger" she shrugs "and then stuff happens... "

They stop talking as there's shouting down below and they watch as they now drag the Admiral out of the group again.  
"CATHERINE ...I hope you can hear me. I need you to show yourself" He forces her father on to his knees in front of him as he points a gun at the back of his head.

There are further screams in the room.

Bravo sit up to look as much as they can from the darkness of their vantage point

"Catherine, show yourself!..." he listens for any noises "For your Fathers sake"

Clay looks at Sonny "You think he's really gonna do it?" he whispers

"Let's hope not!"

 _Shit!_ "Jason, I have to go! You know what they're gonna do. That's my father down there. I can't just sit here"

She starts to makes a move to stand up, but Jason grabs her and holds her down. He puts his hand over her mouth

"Shhh! CJ just calm down" he whispers in her ear, turning her round so she's sitting with her back to the scene below "CJ, look at me. Hey c'mon ..look at me!" He still has his hand across her mouth, so she doesn't make a sound, while he tries to get her attention, to focus  
"I'm gonna take my hand away but don't say a word just look at me" He gets in her eye line. He can see her in the low light. "Listen... You go down there... you're both dead! You know that" he takes his hand away slowly. He nods and she nods back.  
"Your father's not gonna want that, there is nothing we can do now. So, I need you to listen, I need you to focus and just look at me. Don't take your eyes off of me, promise me"

She tries to look back at the scene below. She's breathing much deeper now. Jason takes a grip on the back of her head firmly holding her fixed in front of him.

"I'm warning you Ms Lewis ... SHOW YOURSELF NOW"

"Focus here on me" Jason tells her. He can guess from experience what's about to happen. "I'm here..just keep looking at me!"

Her breathing gets deeper and slower with every breath until she thinks she might stop breathing. They both close their eyes and he leans his forehead on hers. He can feel her start to shake "It's okay...it's okay, just keep focusing on me"

The both take a deep intake of breath as the sound of a single gunshot rings out.

She jolts at the sound. She's now shaking uncontrollably. The lump in her throat means she can't swallow; she can't breathe, and she scream out either. There's a pain that stabs her in the chest. It hurts so much. Large tears roll down her face, but she can't open her eyes. She can't breathe and she just wants to scream out loud

Jason's still holding her head against his. "Breath CJ, I've got you" he whispers. She sucks in her tears trying to not make a sound. He kisses her. His lips on her soft ones "Shhh!... I've got ya'"

The guys all look at each other, then at the floor they can't move. Jason closes his eyes, pulling her tighter against him. He can feel all of her pain inside him as he wraps his arms around her "God, I'm so sorry. I wish we could have done something"

They suddenly interrupted by the sound of Blackburn on the radio "BRAVO 1 this is HAVOC, sit rep copy"

Jason realises he needs to focus now. if they're to get anyone out of her alive then then he needs to focus more now than ever. "Ray!. "he calls behind "Ray, just take her!"

He wants to hold her, but he knows if they're all to get out alive he has to do his job now

Ray frowns as Jason transfer her from his arms to Rays "Yeah sure thing! C.J come on!" he's unsure what to say to her but he takes her to one of the side doorways and sits her down. Ray looks back at Sonny neither know what to say.

Jason needs to focus. He takes a deep breath. He has to act as leader now, he has to get everyone out safe "HAVOC this is bravo 1 copy"

"We just received a video message online. Can you update with sit rep and confirm what we've seen"?

"HAVOC please be advised..." he looks over at CJ "... Admiral Lewis is dead "

Ray sits with her. Holding her. She can't breathe and she's now starting to have a panic attack

He doesn't know what to say so he just holds her as she cries into his shoulder "come on just breath! I've got ya"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Search the floors and find her... she's here somewhere"

"Looks like they're on the move" Sonny says to Jason as they see movement downstairs

"Okay, they gonna be coming! Let's even these numbers up. Assuming they don't know we're here, let's use that to our advantage"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She's sitting quieter now by the wall her head in her hands gathering her thoughts. Ray sits back down beside her "Hey" he hands her some water he found in one of the rooms. She takes a sip "How you doin' now? "

"Yeah I'm okay!"

He smiles as her as he slumps himself down against the wall next to her. He's quiet for a while before he speaks "So your _husband?_ " he frowns "Said you've got a kid now?"

She doesn't look up just sits hugging her knees "He told you that?"

"Yeah! yeah he did, earlier, downstairs when we were talking. Gotta admit it took me a bit by surprise. Can't say I ever imagined you with a kid " he laughs

She smiles, wiping the tears from her cheek "No, no I guess not..me either. Not something I really had on my to do list but.. it happened so..."

"What's he called? Your boy, what's his name?"

She turns her head sideways to look at him, still resting it on her knees. She bites her lip, thinking " _Um..._ Jaycee" she smiles at Ray. "His name is Jaycee"

he frowns as she smiles watching him "You see what I did there?" she laughs "C.J .. J C ?"

Ray smiles at her and nods "Oh .. I get it" He thinks for a minute before speaking again "um..." he coughs "He, Christian he also told me something else, he also told _me_... it wasn't his kid" He chews his inside lip thinking watching her reaction.

She gulps and looks at Ray "He told _YOU_ that?" she frowns. She's not sure how to reply

Ray nods. "Yeah he did!"

She sighs, scratches her head and runs her fingers through her hair before she lets out a bigger sigh. They both sit silent. She's thinking whether to answer but she decides not to. He puts his hand on her knee. She puts her hand on top of his and feels the softness of the back of his hand. She's gently rocking and wipes a tear away. Then she leans her head on his shoulder and sighs

"Hey, c'mon. We're gonna get home to our kids" he reassures her.

She nods.

Their moment gets interrupted. "Hey, how you doin'?" Jason smiles at her and puts his hand on her cheek.

she nods at him "I'm holding it together. But I just wanna get out of here now."

"Yeah I know." He rubs her cheek gently with his hand "We're going to. We just have to sort this mess out first." he looks at Ray "So I have a plan, you ready to be the cheese in a big mouse trap?"

Her and Ray frown at him not sure what he's talking about He smiles "C'mon, get up! Let's go do this and go home!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o


	21. Chapter 21

**The Funeral**

Slumped by the wall at the corner where the two corridors meet. Her breathing's slow and deep while she tries to stay calm. Watching as the tango comes towards her, pointing his gun, indicating for her to get up.

"Shit! Here he comes." she whispers

"Just hold steady we're here" Jason reassures here "Remember they want you alive. We've done this once already, so just stay calm"

She gulps "Yeah that's easy for you to say. You're not the one playing sitting duck."

Jason laughs at her voice in his earpiece. Ray smiles.

"UP!... UP!" the voice in broken English shouts at her.

She puts her hands up "I can't, I can't get up. I've hurt my leg" she rubs her leg shaking her head making the tango confused.

"I say.. get up!"

She shakes her head again "I can't. Leg...hurt!"

He puts his gun strap around over his shoulder and grabs her arm, trying to force her to a standing position

**Bang!** There's a _pffftt_ sound from the muzzled gun and a thud as the body drops heavily to the ground in front of CJ

 _Pheww_!" She lets out the breath she was holding, pulling her legs from under the dead guy

"This is Bravo 1 target down" he turns and looks at Ray "Okay" he sighs " that's the third one down"

They drag this body to a side room and the corridor is empty again as if nothing ever happened "Bravo 3 this is Bravo 1 Anymore up here?"

"Negatory Bravo 1"

"Any movement your end, Bravo 6"

"No! No movement here. 6 out"

"This is Bravo 1 all call signs. Meet back on the galleria" Jason takes a breath and looks at Ray "How many we count now?"

"Five including our main cheese"

Jason sighs "Damn! Still too many to pick them off from up here, without losing any hostages" he bites his lip thinking "Okay, we're gonna have to lure some more of them out"

"Jace, they're not gonna buy it. Soon they're gonna realise somethings going on, especially when the others don't come back" Ray frowns "Then they'll know she can't be on her own"

"Um...you know I just need the bathroom" she looks at her hands they're covered in some of the dead guys blood "I won't be a minute"

"C.J you okay?" Jason frowns. He's worried about how she's holding up after everything

"Yeah, I'm fine...promise" she smiles. She heads along the corridor to one of the many public bathrooms.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

As she comes out and the door closes behind her. She spots a figure lurking in the corridor opposite. She frowns, checking each of the other directions, looking, wondering how far she is from the rest of the team. A sick feeling stirs in her stomach as she realises how vulnerable she is standing here. Then she's puzzled as the person standing there calls out and the voice is familiar

"Christian?"

"Catherine,...Catherine, are you okay?"

She looks back down the corridor towards the team. Then steps towards the voice "Christian, what the hell are you doing up here? How did you get away?"  
He doesn't reply, and she takes a few steps closer. She can see he's leaning against the wall "Christian, are you okay? Are you hurt?" her instinct screams at her that something's wrong here

"Help me Catherine, please!"

She shakes her head, she's not sure what's going on, but she steps closer "Why? What's happened?"

 _Arrgghhh!_ She cries out as his hand makes a grab, hard, at her throat. The tightness is choking her, and she can't breathe, she coughs, struggling trying to speak

"Oh my God! Christian, what ...the hell... are you doing ...Let me GO!" she chokes and coughs

He slams her hard into the wall beside the bathroom door. She's winded for a moment and can't fight him off. Struggling to free herself as he overpowers her with his strength. His hand feeling her all over before he takes the gun from her pants waistband.

She manages to let out a stifled scream and he quickly slams his hand over her mouth "Shut the hell up!"

He bangs her head back against the wall while he gets the bathroom door open. She's fighting and scratching him, and she scratches at his cheek to which he reacts by slapping her hard in the face "You stupid bitch!" he throws her down onto the hard-tiled floor of the bathroom.

"What do you want?" she's panicked now, fearful for her life "How did you get away?"

"I didn't " He smiles

She looks at him confused trying to make sense of what's going on "Are you part of this?" she questions looking at his face "Oh my god you are!"

He laughs "What you think I wanted to be with you? A drunken whore." he shakes his head "Don't kid yourself. The old man just couldn't help sticking his nose in could he. Wouldn't back down despite the warnings"

He smiles as he watches her shivering in fear on the floor and then he drops down on top of her his weight holding her against the cold hard tiles.

She tries to roll on to her side, but he turns her over so she's still on her back. Forcing his knees between her legs, spreading them open as he holds her wrists pinning her down. He's brushing her hair away from her face still smiling at her. She turns her head as she tries to pull away as he makes an attempt to kiss her.

"They need that list back and then this can all be over" he stares at her. He's pulling her vest up and putting his hand inside, groping painfully at her breast "They need these investigations to stop but he wouldn't listen, stubborn old fool. Perhaps you will now or you wanna end up the same as him? What's gonna happen to your kid then?"

She closes her eyes her breathing is deep, she feels helpless "Christian, please let me go!"

He laughs "Too late, it's all gone too far now Catherine. This needs to be ended. You need to give that list back before anyone else gets hurt"

She's frightened. He's too heavy for her to move. She looks away from him closing her eyes tight. She can still feel his hands touching her. "Christian please... get off me!"

He pulls her hair to make her look at him "You know what, I'm gonna enjoy this first. Before I take you back I'm gonna have you to myself" He smiles "I'm gonna take what you've been holding back, _wife_ "

She tries to fight him as he pulls at her clothes, undoing her combats and pulling at the top of her panties. She tries to pull free from his grip. He slaps her again and is undoing his belt.

"Don't do this!" she's pleading and kicking out, but he pins her legs down "I'll give you the list.. just stop... please Christian don't!"

" _Mmmm!_ " He smiles as he puts his hand on her breast again, while kissing into her neck. She's fighting every way she can to get away

"GET off me! Christian please!... I'm begging you, STOP!" she screams with every ounce of energy she can find but she's struggling to breathe and he's hurting her. She's shaking so much because she can't stop him. Her adrenaline surges and tears roll down her cheek as he forces his hand inside her panties, "Please stop!"

Then she looks up and she sees him, and she breathes a sigh of relief "Jason, thank god!"

"Hey douche bag I think she asked you to stop!"

Christian can feel the hard metal of the gun barrel pressed to the back of his head. He smiles and shakes his head he can't believe it, but he pulls his hands out and slowly stands up

"What a surprise Jason Hayes to the rescue" he smiles as he turns on Jason and pulls the gun he took from CJ earlier.

A shot goes off.

Her face drops. She holds her breathe. "Jason!" but it's Christian that drops to the floor on top of her. She screams as he lands on her.

Clay's in the doorway he lowers his rifle. Everyone lets out a sigh of relief. Jason gulps as he nods his appreciation at Clay. He nods in reply

"You both good?"

"Yeah all good! Thanks... good shot! Jason pulls her up off of the floor "You okay?"

"Yeah I'm okay!" she nods panicked

Clay nods at them both "I'll leave you to it, I'll check the other corridor"

She's shaking and shivering now as the adrenaline surges through her body. She rubs her neck which hurts. Jason pulls her close and holds her as she sighs out loud. The shakes are so bad and uncontrollable, and she closes her eyes. Trembling so much that she wishes she could just stay here like this.

They look each other in the eyes. He puts his hand on the side of her face and smiles "It's fine, you're safe. I've got you, so just calm down" She nods her breathing is starting to calm now. She's staring at him and him at her. "Just breathe…slowly"

She nods. Then she can't resist in the moment she reaches up and kisses him, she needs the comfort of that kiss.

"Hey, not here. C'mon you need to keep it together now"

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine. Sorry, I just.." she gets a grip back on her emotions and pulls back _C'mon Catherine you're stronger than this._ She pats her hand on his chest reassuring him "I am, I'm okay."

Calmer now, she lays her head against his chest, just giving herself a moment to get her breathe back and he puts his hand around her head, holding her tight against him.

"Boss, we got movement downstairs" Ray says looking in the room "You two alright?"

"Yeah, yeah we're good. We're coming now"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Okay, so give me a sitrep" Jason's back in control mode as Ray runs through a quick sitrep " So, still the same" Jason watches the hostiles downstairs, from their dark vantage point on the balcony

"Ms Lewis!" a voice calls up towards them "I know you can hear me." He waits and listens to the silence ",But I need you to stop playing games now and come down. You're testing my patience. Maybe you need another little incentive" Ashraf walks towards the remaining hostages and starts surveying them. He looks at the women

"HER!" he points at Davis "Yes her. She offered a swap earlier, her life for a stranger, let's see if Ms Lewis will do her the same kindness"

Davis gulps her breathing increases as a fear and panic overwhelms hers. She's hoping the guys have got some sort of plan, because she knows in her working head that no official protocols will ever allow the swap of C.J for her, a Petty officer.

"Ms LEWIS, can I draw your attention to this this woman. What is your name?"

Davis swallows hard. Her lip trembling, she speaks "Lisa"

"Lisa" he smiles rubbing his hand on her cheek " Lisa here would like you to come down Ms Lewis so that I don't have to hurt her."

"SHIT DAVIS!" Sonny panics and turns around and looks at Jason who's watching and thinking "Boss, you gotta do something. Jason, are you listening?"

 _"Shhh!_ Sonny I'm thinking"

"Jason you gotta do something man!" Ray looks at him for answers "You can't just let him kill Davis"

C.J looks around at them all. She gulps and rubs her head with both hands. She catches her breathe "There's no choice Jason. I need to go down there "

"Always choices. It's not gonna solve anything if you go down there. He'll probably still kill Davis, if not both of you" he's still thinking. "We need to stall him"

"And how the hell do we do that?" Sonny frowns

Reagan now has a hold of Davis. Ashraf nods at him and he punches her. Davis drops to the floor. Ashraf nods again. They pick her up and repeat again. She cries out in agony.

"BOSS!" Sonny's alarmed "You gotta do something _NOW!"_

"Just wait! _Let_ me think Sonny!"

C.J closes her eyes as Reagan hits Davis again and again. It gives her flashbacks to the pain when she was on the receiving end, in Nigeria.

Sonny's fuming "For god sake Jason offer the swap. They want her alive, so offer the exchange. We'll work out what to do after"

C.J looks at Sonny and frowns "He's right Jason let me go" she pleads

"NO!" he turns on her and Sonny "No just wait!" Jason's head's spinning and he can't think straight. _"Think Jason. Work the problem. There has to be a better way than handing her over._

Sonny grinds his teeth and shakes his head. He knows there is no way Jason will swap C.J for Davis and he's pissed about it.

"Okay, here's what we do. Clay you in position over there. You're gonna take out our big Cheese. Kill shot no mistakes. I need it clean. One take"

Clay nods "Sure, no problem"

"Ray you go around the other side. You're on the guy watching the hostages. Same MO as Clay"

He looks at Sonny "And we need to lure the other two out. We need them to come here. Then we'll take them out. We go down and when they open the doors Spenser and Ray will take their targets. We take the ones at the door" He looks at them all "at the moment we assume they don't know we're here. We'll use that again to our advantage"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

C.J gulps as she shouts out "OK STOP!"

The beating on Davis stops. Ashraf looks at Brent and smiles as they drop Lisa to a beaten heap on the floor.

"That son bitch is mine" Sonny frowns.

C.J shuffles to the balustrade rails and sits looking through. Ashraf sees her and smiles "Ms Lewis.." he claps " you did well. I give you respect you have eluded me despite provocation" he smiles "Now if you don't mind please... come down"

"I can't" she holds up a blood covered hand. "I'm hurt. Christian, he attacked me before I killed him. My gun went off and hit my leg"

"I'll go get her" Reagan says with a smile, he can't wait to get his hands on her again "Take Yousef with you. I want her alive for now remember. Until we get the whereabouts of that list. After that she is all yours"

C.J shuffles back to the darkness by the wall and Jason bends down to her "Okay? We are right here, alright? So, just stay calm" Jason reassures her "Alright, let's get this show on the road. Chop chop" Jason claps his hands

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay lays with is rifle working out his shot keeping Ashraf in his cross hairs. He can see Davis is still on the floor she hasn't moved.

Sonny's in his ear "Hey golden boy, don't miss"

"Don't worry I don't intend to"

Clay can make out Ray in the exact same position to him on the other side of the balcony but trained on the target guarding the hostages

There's a ping as the lift doors open.

"They must have reinstated the lift power so whatever happens we can't let them get her to that lift"

"Catherine where are you?" Reagan's suspicious already. "Stay there" he points to Yousef "Guard the lift. We don't want her getting away" He pulls out a knife from his side. "Catherine?" he calls out again.

She puts her hands out in the dark. He sees her "Well, well, you look so much better now than how I left you before" He smiles

She sighs as a flashback of the hospital room comes in her head. She starts to feel panic rising. She's breathless. He smiles as he squats down beside her where she's sitting "we are going to have so much fun together while we find out where that list is" She's backed up against the wall the light catching on the knife blade he's rubbing it against her cheek "Get up!"

she slides up the wall. He lifts the side of her vest with the knife tip. Though she knows Jason's right there she feels really scared at this moment one on one with the man who stabbed her before. It would only take a second for him to do it again and Jason wouldn't be able to stop him.

He looks at her scar "I'm sure it's still painful at times..." he runs his hand over the area of the knife wound "Take it from me, these things never heal properly, and it took you so long in that rehab to recover from the mess it made of you" he laughs "I almost felt sorry taking you out of there... still here we are again" He smiles.

She swallow hard trying to calm her fears. She takes a sharp intake of breath as he runs the knife blade close to her skin "Don't.. please."

"Oh, I'm not gonna hurt you again, well not right now. No, we've got plenty of time for that" he runs the knife along her vest up her neck back to resting by her cheek. "Don't be afraid"  
He's looking deep into her eyes and she pushes herself back against the wall. A tear rolls down her cheek, all today's emotions and fears are starting to take their toll on her and she doesn't know how much longer she can hold it together. She just wants this all to be over now.

o-o -o-o-o-o-o

Sonny grabs the target by the throat and twists his neck quietly. He shows no emotion at what he's done. This is for Lisa now. He's going to be serving up pay back. He drags the body to a side room. "Bravo 1 this is Bravo 3 Lift secure"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

As soon as Reagan drops the knife away from CJ's face he receives a painful blow to the side of his head as Jason punches him. C.J drops to the floor she can't get her breath she's so panicked.

"What the hell…" Reagan wasn't expecting it as he turns he sees Jason "Oh really! " he smiles "I should have known she wasn't alone up here"

Jason smacks him again and he stumbles. All of Jason's built up anger is coming to the surface now as they start to fight. He's overpowering Reagan but then Reagan comes back at him with the knife and slashes Jason's arm. This causes Jason to let go of him. He then kicks Jason's legs away and he falls to the ground, raining in kicks on Jason until he manages to pull his arm around and grab Brent's leg to bring him down.

He's on him trying to choke him but he kicks Jason off. He stands up to lunge at Jason with the knife he picked up.

Then suddenly it's Reagan who's making choking sounds as Sonny has him by the throat. "You know _we_ could have had so much fun" Sonny whispers in his ear "It's just I haven't got time today. This is for Lisa, you son of a bitch…I'll see you in Hell"

And just like that with no cares he twists breaking his neck and Reagan's body drops to the floor

Everyone lets out a huge sigh of relief "You okay boss?" Sonny smiles as he helps Jason up

Jason nods. He looks at his arm. It's more a surface wound and he'll live with it for now till they get finished.

Ray and Spenser are still in place on their targets. C.J's still sitting by the wall. She's still trying to hold herself together and get her breath back.

Jason bends down to her. He can see she's struggling "Hey come on ...you're gonna be okay!?"

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine" she nods "I just need a second" she wipes her tears away this is not her she hates being this person but it's all getting too much now

He helps her up ""Okay? You ready to go?"

She nods at them both

"Hey .. you need to hold it together .. for Lisa" Sonny looks at them both "we need to get moving .. she needs us"

C.J looks him in the eye she knows how he feels about Davis and how hard it would have been for him watching what they did to her. She nods at him "Yeah... let's do this!"

Jason looks at them all "C'mon then, let's get this done"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They go down in the lift as they put their hands on the large doors ready to open them

"2 ... 6 this is Bravo1 we go on 3" he looks at C.J and Sonny "Ready?" they nod "3 ,2 ,1 execute"

They swing the doors open. Ashraf smiles for a second expecting to see Brent with C.J not this. He doesn't have time to register as a shot rings out followed less than a second later by a second shot. The two targets drop to the floor and Sonny takes his target at the door

"This is Bravo 1 all call signs. Area is secure. Tangos down...HAVOC do you copy?"

"BRAVO 1 this is HAVOC copy"

"HAVOC tangos HVTs secure... I repeat hostages are secured. We need medical assistance ASAP copy"

"Copy that Bravo 1" Blackburn let's out a sigh of relief

"This is one out"

Everyone breathes. Sonny and Ray get to Davis. She's in a pretty bad way. They start medical assessing her till back up arrives with help.

C.J sits with her head in her hands in the quiet at the back of the room as she watches them take her Father's body away. Tears roll down her face as all of the emotions hit her at once.

Sonny, Ray and Spenser help themselves to some of the beers left on the bar and they all let out a big sigh as they drink.

o-o-o-o-o-o

The room has been cleared. The officials there still doing investigation and the bodies have all been removed.

Sonny looks at Jason "Is it okay if I get off to the hospital, check on Davis?"

"Yeah sure! Hey Sonny , let us know how she is when you get there."

"Will do!"

Jason looks around they've taken the Admirals body. He can't see C.J and he wonders where she is as they didn't get to speak since they were upstairs. He now needs to know she's okay.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

He knocks softly on the half open door of room 254. She's in there packing her stuff up.

"Hey you!" he smiles

"Hey!" she smiles "Just needed some quiet, thought I'd get my stuff together, before I head off"

Jason nods understanding "They're finishing up downstairs they need us to attend a De-brief first, before you leave"

She nods "Yeah of course, I guess they will. Um…I just need a few minutes first" she sits on the edge of the bed her head in her hands and lets out a long sigh. "Shit!" she starts to cry again "urggghh! Sorry, I'm just so tired".

Jason nods again. He just stands watching her "Hey come on, its fine. It's been a long night, a lot to take onboard. You don't have to be sorry!"

She looks at him and smiles. "Thanks. Thanks for everything. For being there" He comes over and pulls her head against his hip holding her head, stroking her hair. She closes her eyes. "oh Jason. God, how the hell did this happen?"

she looks up at him. He leans down to kiss her. She sighs. It's so nice the warmth of his hand on her face and his soft kisses taking away all the pain away. She puts her hand behind his head pulling him to her. They don't stop kissing and the next thing they're all over each other. They can't stop it. All the adrenaline from today rushing around their bodies. Frantically he pulls her vest over her head, then he undoes his pants. He wants her so much. It's a frenzied mix of their clothes and their bodies.

 _Jason!_ She's breathless with anticipation as he silences her with his mouth over hers kissing her. His weight is on top of her, wanting her, needing her. Wrapped up in this moment between them.  
He stops and looks her in the eyes checking this is what she wants. She lets out a breathless cry " _Don't stop!"_ Arching her back bringing herself to him. His hands working their way down her sides then under her, pulling her towards him. His touch on the smooth of her skin as she tips her head back and he kisses down her neck, down on to her now heaving chest. Her body reaching out, showing him how much she wants him.

Then as soon as it began it's over. They both let out a huge sigh and relax. She closes her eyes as his weight relaxes onto her. She smiles. Putting her head back and closes her eyes while he watches her. "Jeez!" She laughs "Where the hell did that come from?"

He smiles contented as he runs his hands over her neck then drawing small circles around her breast. She looks back longingly at him. He's kissing her, as she holds his head, her hand on the back of it running her fingers in is hair.

Jason looks at his watch as he lays, half covered by the sheet on the bed with her lying curled next to him, resting her chin on his chest, gently rubbing his skin with her fingertips. She laughs out loud

"What?" he frowns

"Nothing, just this!" she smiles "It's a bit crazy... after everything that's happened in the last few hours." she sighs and laughs again, shaking her head at the absurdity of it all

He kisses her "Well you always did want some fun!"

"Yeah! Yeah I did" she kisses him back. They're kissing his hands running over the skin on her back when they're interrupted by a cough

 _"Ray!"_

"SHIT!." he closes his eyes. Embarrassed at the sight of her nakedness laying on the bed. "Sorry! Um.. oh god! Look, I'm sorry I didn't..." Ray doesn't know where to look. He steps back outside the door. He wasn't expecting to walk in on that "um...I just needed to let you know... Blackburn wants a de-brief downstairs ten minutes"

"Um ... yeah thanks Ray. We'll be down in a minute" Jason smiles as she, embarrassedly closes her eyes and buries her head under the pillow.

Ray rolls his eyes as he walks away shaking his head. "Jeez... not this again!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

 ** 2 weeks later **

The Day of Admiral Lewis's Funeral.

It's full military affair with all the honors of his Rank. All of Bravo are in attendance.

After the service is over C.J takes some time by the graveside with a colleague from her Father's office. Standing by the graveside she has a small blonde-haired child on her hip that she's carrying.

"Hey!" Clay has a surprised puzzled look on his face. "Hey there little man" Clay tickles the boy on the chin. He smiles and the baby smiles back reaching out with his hand. Clay puts his finger out for him, and he holds it. Clay's watching her holding him. He gives her a confused look as he frowns questioning her "He yours?"

C.J bites her lip and nods "um... Jeanette could you take him for a minute please?"

"Okay...so, you have a child." he's waiting to see if he gets an explanation, but nothing comes. He nods "Well he's a cute!" he furrows his head trying to make some sense "I um … I didn't know that you had a kid Well I didn't know you got married either" He closes his eyes and rubs his head trying to make some sense

She offers nothing in the way of explanation she just stands there rubbing her lips thinking. "So…" she sighs

"Sooo … " he smiles awkwardly back "um...Davis says you're getting a flight to London tonight?"

She nods "Yeah, yeah I'm going to stay with friends for a while. Just until I see where this whole mess is at"

"Okay so um.. so, I guess this is goodbye... again" he gulps and silently nods his head. He's actually wondering where it leaves him.

"Yeah, yeah it is" she kisses him full on the lips. He tries to kiss her back, but she pulls away. "Goodbye Clay"

"Goodbye?" he frowns "Right. Okay then." He nods. He bites his lip and his head drops "Okay ... yeah, I guess that's it " He nods and sighs it all feels really awkward now.

She closes her eyes biting her lip, she smiles then she turns and walks away from him. She gulps at the lump in her throat as she collects her son back into her arms holding him tightly against her.

Clay looks at the sky. He wipes a tear from his cheek. Not really sure what just happened. He turns to look back at Sonny who's been waiting under the tree nearby for him.  
He comes puts his arm around his shoulder "C'mon Blondie, I hear they have a comp bar at this wake. Perhaps they have some BBQ chicken as well"

Clay smiles as he walks away with him. Sonny looks back, following her to the car with is eyes. He's hoping in his heart that she's really going for good this time.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason and C.J look at each other, She's holding her boy on her hip. She lets out a deep breath "Well guess this is goodbye then" She reluctantly smiles as she kisses Jason on the cheek

"Yeah I guess so" he kisses her back "Take care C.J"

He gently puts his finger on the child's cheek and rubs it as CJ looks up at Ray who's standing there beside them. He can't look her in the eye. He shakes his head disapprovingly

"Bye Ray" she kisses his cheek, but she can tell he's annoyed with her "Look, after him" she smiles, glancing at Jason "he needs you even if he's too stubborn to admit it sometimes" she laughs

Ray's conscience is torn now whether to speak up or not as he continues to shake his head at her. He can't believe she's not addressed the issue that's right there in front of them. He coughs "You know I'll um... I'll give you a minute. You might wanna talk?" he frowns at her.

"So, you going to London?" Jason asks looking at the waiting car

She nods "Yeah for a while. At least until this all dies down. There's always gonna be a risk now. I just need to assess how much" she sighs "plus I just need to rest. You wouldn't believe how tired I am"

"Yeah, yeah believe me I would. I feel it too" he bites his lip thinking what to say, "Well take care, of the two of you!" he looks her in the eye. She swallows back the emotional lump in her throat and tearfully nods as he kisses her on the forehead "Come here." He wraps the pair of them in his arms and resting his chin on her head. She gulps back her tears as she pulls away as he struggles to let her go.

"You too" she smiles before kissing his cheek again, holding for a moment closing her eyes. She gulps before speaking then she whispers in his ear "I love you Jason."

He nods and looks away. His eyes stinging with tears. She goes to the waiting car and he lets out a long emotional sigh trying to hold himself together.

"Jace, you okay, Brother?" Ray frowns as he watches her walk away

He nods holding in his emotions he's thinking. He's so torn "What would you have done Ray? Would you have stopped her going?" he looks at Ray searching for answers "Would you have wanted to know for sure?"

Ray sighs and shakes his head "I don't know brother. You and her, it's always such a mess, I really don't know. Perhaps her leaving...perhaps it's a good thing? She needs some time alone I think, make sense of stuff" he puts his hand on Jason's back "Hey come on man, let's go get a drink"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter 23: You're a Good Man Ray Perry**

As they turn to walk away Ray spots the small blue bear on the path. He picks it up and looks back to the car. "Oh hell! Look, I better just take this …." He nods in direction of the car "I mean; he might not settle without it?"

Jason nods. "Yeah, yeah I guess you'd better"

Ray wonders if he should give Jason another chance to go back to her, but he decides otherwise and so he heads back to her with the bear. "You head back I'll catch you up in minute"

o-o-o-o-o-o

"C.J wait!" he calls out, waving the bear high in the air.

She smiles, as Ray gets to the car. She's on the opposite side of the vehicle, trying to fix the strap on the car seat. She comes around to his side of the car "Oh thanks! I was just wondering where that was..". she smiles, looking at the bear "It's his favorite"

Ray waves the bear at the little boy as he smiles "C.J maybe you should talk to Jason about..."

"Ray, STOP!" she shakes her head "I'm not sure it's safe for us to be here, so I can't stay. I can't be around Jason. Trust me, this is the best way."

He bites his lip thinking and nods "Okay, maybe you're right"

She smiles passing the child over to Ray, while she goes back around the other side of the car "I need to sort this damn car seat. I tell ya, they should put sorting car seats on a military training programme" she laughs.

"Yeah, been there done that!" Ray smiles. He's thinking while he stares at the little boy. Staring at his small, happy face. He waves the blue bear and the little boy and laughs. Ray smiles, then he shakes his head, sighing, as he looks to the sky. "Jeez, what a mess"

Neither of them is pay attention to the black Mercedes car, and it's too late to move when it pulls alongside CJ on her side of the car. The window rolls down and a voice calls out from the open window. "Ms Lewis, get in the car, please!"

"Sorry what?" At first she doesn't hear what is said and she turns around, taking a deep breath as she see the open car door. A large man. points a gun at her. She freezes, trying to stay calm. "Get in Ms Lewis. We wouldn't want any _accidents_ to happen here, would we?"

She can see them looking at Ray. He's holding her son and she takes a deep breath wondering what she should do.

Ray's face drops, he suddenly realises what's going on "C.J wait! No, don't get in the car!"

She shakes her head "Ray, stay there!" She has a real dilemma of choices now. No way she can fight back because if she does, so wonders what might happen. She lets out a long sigh, running her hand through her hair. Her breathing is deliberately slower while she tries to stay calm and decide what to do.

"I said _get_ in _Ms_ Lewis. I'm not going to ask you again."

She swallows back her tears and closes her eyes in anguish. Looking at Ray, holding her son. All of her training, and Ray's hasn't prepared them for a moment of decisions like this. Ray's standing there, holding her boy. She knows that getting in this car that she is putting herself in danger but it's probably the only thing that's going to keep them safe.

"Look after him Ray" she rubs her hand on her forehead, the she makes her decision and gets into the open door of the car. It pulls off at speed and seconds later it's gone from Ray's view. He puts his hand on his head. _Shit!_ He's not sure what to do now _SHIT_!

"Oh lord!" He's frantic now, as he holds tightly on to the little boy, then taking out his phone, he calls Jason.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Back at base it's all systems go they frantically try to trace the vehicle.

"Mandy, tell me something" Jason snaps "What do you have?"

"Nothing so far. The plates on the car are not picking up on any traffic cams. We're running, the vague, descriptions Ray gave. But I have nothing further on that yet."

"I'm sorry man." Ray has his head in his hands "I should have done something" He's not actually sure what exactly he could have done. He's trained for a lot of situations in his life, but nothing like that moment, not while holding a baby.

Jason wants to say _yes, yes you should have done something_ but in reality he knows there is nothing Ray could have done, except what he did, and kept the child safe. He leans back in his chair, his hands on his head, rubbing his temples. He can't think straight wondering what's happened to her.

Davis enters the room. She's carrying the little boy. "Umm..."

"What?! Jason snaps at her "What do you want?"

"Sorry, but I was just wondering? What.. what are we gonna do with ..." she nods" well, with him? I mean, I got some nappies, and I've changed him, but who do I call to come get him? Where does he go?"

Ray looks at Jason, though Jason ignores them both, he just puts his head back in his hands. Ray sighs "Okay, Davis, see if you can locate some family, some relatives"

"Yeah I already tried. There was no luck. Mainly because her personnel files are all classified, and access is restricted. So, there are no family details mentioned"

"Mandy, can you try? See what, if any, access you can get?"

"I'll try" Mandy nods "but it's always been impossible in the past."

"So, if not, then do I call child services to come get him?"

Ray looks at Jason, then back to Davis "Let's take some time, just see what we can find out first" Ray comes around the table as Davis hands him to Ray

"I need some air!" Jason gets up and walks out.

"Jace!" Ray sighs and shakes his head in frustration.

o-o-o-o-o-o

Sonny's now carrying the little boy on his hip. They're in his cage and he's showing him things, keeping him entertained talking to him. He looks up as Clay opens the door and comes in

Clay frowns, Sonny has his back to him and he can hear him chattering away "Um... Sonny man, I'm starting to worry about you. Have you finally lost it?"

Sonny turns around and now Clay can see the little one "Oh, what are you doing? Where did you get him from? "

"I got him out of a crackerjack box! Where'd do you think?" He smiles " I just brought him for a walk around, I think he wuz gettin' bored, stuck in that office with Ray"

Clay laughs "Sonny man, He's a baby. I don't think he knows about getting bored. Anyway, what's happening with him?"

"I don't know" Sonny shrugs "Think Ray said they gettin' child services to collect him at some point"

"Poor little thing" Clay sighs, shaking his head "I mean, in just one day. Bam! He's lost everything. It's so sad." Clay's trying not to think too hard about what really might have happened to CJ

"Hey Clay, I gotta go cut loose for a minute, can you watch him?" Sonny sits him on the table in front of Clay "Hey little man, you stay here with Uncle Spenser. And don't you have too much fun while I'm gone. Uncle Sonny, be back in a minute"

Clay laughs at the way Sonny is with him "Sure thing. He frowns, worried, he's never really taken care of a small child on his own before "So…" he looks around "what you wanna do?" The child looks at him and then starts to cry "Oh great! No! No, don't cry" he looks at his little crying face "You miss your Mommy? I know "he sighs "I miss her too. But hey.. hey don't cry. Look c'mon"

He squats down in front of him so that he's at eye level with him. He keeps looking, staring at him. He's not really sure what it is he's looking for, but certain thoughts start to cross his mind. He lets out a long and stands upright rubbing his lips, thinking hard.

"There that's better!" Sonny frowns as he sees him crying "Uncle Sonny's back now! Hey Clay, what the hell'd you do to him? Hey, did nasty Uncle Spenser make you cry? "

"I don't know" Clay smiles "I've obviously not got _the_ right touch with little kids. Look Sonny, I gotta go"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Sorry I don't understand?" Jason's so tired, the stress and worrying about C.J is taking its toll "We need to be focusing on finding C.J, not this kid" He stops talking and frowns "Who the hell did you say you are again?"

"Leena Rodriguez, the Navy's children's protection service" She holds out her hand to Jason, but he just ignores her

"Jason!" Blackburn interrupts "She's here to explain, with C.J _missing_ , and her father dead. She says... well she says that they've been asked to contact _you_ regarding being his legal guardian"

"Guardian? Me? Why they hell would they ask me?"

Though she doesn't like Jason's aggressive tone, Ms Rodriguez continues to talk "Mr Hayes, instructions were left, by Lieutenant Lews that if anything untoward was to happen to her, or her father then .. then we were to contact you, with regards to taking guardianship of the child."

"Me?" he laughs "I can't care for her child. I've got two of my own, that I'm barely there for, then let alone someone else's Ask someone else, not me!"

"It's fine, Mr Hayes" She smiles "We're just checking the information left with us. We'll take him into protection, if you're not able to offer care at this time"

"What? Wait, didn't um...Castle, his father. Didn't he have any family who can care for him?"

Rodriguez looks at Blackburn "I'm sorry but we don't have any details for him. The only the instructions set out by the Lieutenant Lewis was..."

"Ms Lewis!" Jason interrupts

"Sorry what?"

"CJ, she's not a Lieutenant anymore. You need to get it right" he puts his head back in his hands.

"Oh. Oh, I'm sorry, that's just what I had on the file. Look, I appreciate this is very difficult time. Please don't worry, we can take him into care for the time being, and I can come back at a more convenient time"

"I'm sorry that might be best for tonight. This is all too much right now " Eric smiles as he tries to smooth everything over.

"Anyway, C.J's not dead" Jason looks at Blackburn "We're gonna get her back. That's what we _should_ be doing. Getting her back! God knows what's happened to her by now. While we're sat here doing nothing, what are they're doing to her?"

"Jason... " Blackburn sighs. He's not so convinced that they will get her back alive. "Jason c'mon. I hear you, and you know we're working on every possible scrap of information. But this... you being like this. It's not going to help"

"I need some air" Jason get up to leave, looking Blackburn straight in the eyes "Eric, we _need_ to find her!"

Sonny's brings the little one back to the office. Ray follows in the door behind them, carrying coffees. "What's up with him?" Ray asks seeing Jason walk out,

Davis looks around. "I'm not sure I should be saying this but.. I know you'd wanna know" She sighs looking around behind her, checking who might overhear " That woman, she from child protection services" she lowers her voice " And she says, that C.J left instructions with the Navy CPS. that if anything happened to her, then... then they should ask Jason to look after him" she nods towards JC

"I guess with her father dead, and obviously, his real father gone in the hostage siege, well. I don't know" she shrugs "perhaps she couldn't think of anyone else that she trusted to take care of him. I mean, it's not as if she probably thought this would happen"

"Or... "Ray frowns "..perhaps she did?"

Davis shrugs" But don't you think it's weird, that out of all the people she must know, that she put Jason down?"

Ray folds his arms and sighs. He bites his lip. Then taking the boy from Sonny's arms he goes to see Blackburn in his office. Rodriguez is just getting ready to leave. She smiles at Ray, putting her arms out to take the little one from him "Very well Commander Blackburn. Like I said, I'll be in touch and hopefully I'll have some new of a placement for him very soon."

"Where are you going with him?" Ray frowns

"Sorry, you are?" she looks at Ray, puzzled.

"Oh um... I'm friend. I mean a friend of his mother's, CJ's "

"Oh sorry!" she smiles "Well um... we'll. place him in a, temporary, children's home. Just for the time being. Just until we find him a foster place with a family."

"So, um... he doesn't have anywhere to go, right? So" Ray frowns "...what if someone, a friend, would take him and look after him in their home. Like a friend of the family."

"Well, it would depend. About that _friend_ , and their situation. But it's something we could consider, yes!"

Ray takes a deep breath thinking long and hard before he speaks "What if I took him?"

Blackburn frowns at Ray. Rodriguez tips her head "Sorry? I'm not sure I follow, what you mean. You take him?"

"I mean...I'd have to speak to my wife first. But…" he shrugs "if it was in his best interest. You know, I just thought it's better... for him. He's been through enough recently, losing his ..." he coughs "father. And now his mother's missing. I thought he might be better in a family situation. I've got two kids of my own."

She hands him her card "I'll take him for now. But call me, after you speak to your wife. We'll see what we can work out! _IF_ you're serious?" she hands him the cardboard ticket "As the mother, is not _officially_ deceased, then a friend placement could be considered, more beneficial, for the child. Rather than being placed in the system"

Blackburn looks at Ray confused and as she closes the door Eric frowns. "Right, you need to start talking, and fast Ray! I want some answers. What was that all about?"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason's in the shower trying to drown his thoughts out, but he can't. Every time he closes his eyes, he sees her, imagining what might be happening to her. "If only I'd asked her to stay, then she wouldn't have been at the car" he keeps questioning himself, wondering if he could have done more to stop this happening.

He leans his head on the wall in the shower, humping his hand against it hard. He's so angry as he turns the water off. He turns around, leaning his head back against the glass shower screen. He just can't get the visions of CJ out of his head.

He takes a towel from the pile and starts drying himself "What the hell were you are playing at C.J? What made you think I could look after a small child?"

o-o-o-o-o-o

Davis makes Jason a coffee as he comes back into the briefing room "It's quiet in here? Where is everyone, why are we not looking for CJ still? And where's that kid?"

"Um _._.. Ray had to do some stuff. But Blackburn's in his office. That's about it I think. Sonny and Trent went to get their heads down for a while"

"And the kid? What they do with him?"

"The woman from child services, she um.. she took him with her"

"Good! Yeah that's good" He bites at his lip and then goes back to his paperwork. "God Dammit!" He suddenly throws the papers down on the desk. "I need a drink!" He pushes his chair away, grabs his jacket off the back of the seat and leaves, slamming the door.

o-o-o-o-o-o

Ray opens the door to his home, quietly. The little boy's asleep on his shoulder as Naima stands in the hallway watching him.. As wrong as this feel, and it does feel so very wrong. She also knows it feels right. Her husband feels it's the right thing to do and so they will go it. "Hey!" she smiles at Ray "Let's put him down in here"

They lay him down in a makeshift cot that Naima got ready, in their own children's room as Naima's motherly instincts kick in. She gently brushes his head as they lay him down for him to continue his sleep. "Poor little thing. He looks so peaceful and innocent. Totally unaware of what's going on" she sighs

She closes the door to the room quietly. "Okay! Start talking Ray Perry!" she says in an abrupt sharp tone of her own. "I get you feel sorry for him, that he's lost his parents. But …he's _her_ child, so why?"

Ray bites his lip he's thinking. He walks over to the refrigerator to take out a beer. _How the hell do I explain this?_

"Well Ray? I'm waiting." She sighs "What..." she points at the door "What, is that all about?"

"Naima, he's lost everything. His grandfather was shot in the head his…" he stops "...one parent was killed, because he was a crazy psychopath. And his mother...his mother is missing. So, I just felt sorry for him and it's not like we can't help, right?"

She eyes him up suspiciously "I love you Ray Perry and of course I trust you. And if you say we need to help, then we need to help" She purses her lips "But I have to admit, and you know it already, that I can' pretend .. but I don't like his mother. But... but saying that, I don't wish this on her, not as parent. If she is alive she must be worried sick" she stops talking "And at the end of the day, this his is not that child's fault. But _WHAT_ are you not telling me here? I need total honesty Ray if you want me to do this!"

"Sit down!" he frowns drinking his beer

"Ray, tell me now. You're worrying me right now. _Tell_ me!" She's getting frustrated. She bobs down in front of him and rests his head on her shoulder "Ray what is it honey? Just tell me. We can't sort it if you don't tell me"

He nods "Yeah, yeah you're right. Okay. Looks, I don't know for sure but it's just a hunch, it's just a gut feeling, and I mean. C.J never actually told me but…" he sighs "But ...I think maybe JC well I pretty much think... I think he's Jason's. Jason's child!" …"

Naima frowns deep "Does Jason know this?"

Ray shakes his head "I don't know, maybe he might suspect. If he does he's not said anything. Maybe he's denying the truth? I don't know. I really don't know, Naima."

She bites her lip and shakes her head "So, you gonna tell him? What you suspect. "

"I don't know but I just didn't want him, the baby, getting put inti the system, before ...before Jason has a chance to get to know him"

Naima kisses him on the head as they put their heads, resting on each other "I love you. You've done the right thing. Ray Perry you are good man!"

.


	23. Chapter 23

**Jason loses his grip**

"I got your text. Where is he?" Ray asks as Sonny nods towards the corner booth of the bar. Ray sighs and rolls his eyes "How long has that been going on?"

"Don't worry, I've been keeping an eye on him, he aint done nothin' too stupid...yet!" Sonny necks his whiskey shot back. "He's definitely been hittin it hard though, had been before I got here."

"So, who the hell's she?" Ray frowns, watching as Jason kisses all over the neck of some woman

"Oh, you know, usual barfly type. Thinks she's hit jackpot tonight. I mean, Jason Hayes and he's payin' "

"Let's go stand over there, I'll get a drink, and we can keep tabs on him."

Sonny orders two more shots and two beers, passing one of the beers to Ray "So what now?" As he looks up he sees Jason has moved from the fun kissing on her neck to full on snogging her face "Oh jeez! Godammit! That's it, we need to make an intervention, or he's gonna regret it."

Sonny slams his glass down, and they head to the corner table "Okay lady, been nice knowing ya but time for you to leave."

"Heyyy! We're just having some fun." she smiles, "Aint that right honey, we're just having fun!" Sonny grabs her arm to get her up and she protests "Hey, you can't do this. Jason who are these guys? Some sort of friends of yours? Not very friendly if you ask me."

"Oh jeez, it's the fun police." Jason rolls his eyes "Just ignore them and get yourself back here." he smiles putting his lips to her neck "Now, where were we?"

Mmmm! She starts laughing "How 'bout we find somewhere quieter, like your place?"

"No! No, that's not happening!" Ray grabs her and pulls her up from the seat "He's coming with us, so time for you to go now."

"You gonna stop us are you Ray?"

"No but I will." Sonny doesn't move from the spot, as Jason gets up and leans forward towards his face.

Ray steps in "Come on Jace, leave it man! Just come back with us." he sighs "Jason listen, you don't want this brother, you'll regret it."

Jason laughs "Oh yeah, yeah I forgot, that's coming from the expert on one-night stand regret"

That stings and Ray's annoyed "I thought that was dead and buried" he shakes his head "You know what? Fine, go ahead, do it! Do what you want Jason. Cos this is the right way to go, yeah? Just like before. This will fix everything, make all the hurt go away, is that what you think?"

Sensing how pissed Ray is with Jason, Sonny tries another plan "Hey darlin' why don't you get us all another round of drinks"

Sonny gives her fifty dollars and winks. "Now, don't hurry back!" She looks at Sonny and smiles as she gets the hint, picking up her bag she leaves.

Jason's leans back in his seat smiling, as she walks away. "Okay Jason, get up, let's go!" Sonny shows the way to the door with his hand

"I'm not going anywhere; I'm waiting for Suzy to come back.

"Yeah, well you'll be waiting long time for that. Don't think we'll be seeing Suzy, or my fifty bucks again" he shakes his head " so why don't we get up stud, and go home"

"Come on Jace, let's go man!" Ray frowns as he can see how drunk Jason is now.

"No! No, I think I want another drink"

Sonny and Ray roll their eyes as Jason staggers up to the bar. He orders more tequila shots. As Sonny tries to get hold of him he pushes back, knocking over a table of drinks behind him.

"Woah! Knock it off guys!"

"Yeah, sorry!" Ray indicates to everyone looking "Sorry! We'll sort it. There's no problem, just an accident. He's fine"

Jason looks at Sonny "I want another drink."

Sonny puts his hands up "Okay, okay we'll get another drink. We can do that!" He looks at Ray "We'll lets drink some more, why not" Sonny knocks back another shot "We can hope he passes out at some point"

Ray shakes his head "Yeah, I'm not sure that's an actual plan." he sighs as he watches Jason now chatting up another woman at the bar.

Clay now arrives and heads over towards them "Hey, what's going on?"

Sonny nods in Jason's direction. Clay frowns, though he doesn't say a word, picking up one of the beers that Sonny pushes in his direction. Clay's seen Jason drunk before but never like this, never this out of control.

As Ray sits at the bar, casually eating the trail mix he sighs. Watching as Jason's wrap himself around the neck of another blonde at the bar.  
Sonny's still drinking shots. They're all bored but they continue to stand at the bar keeping a watch over him. Clay scratches his head "Should we stop him? I mean I've never known him be like this before."

"No, leave him for a bit, it's not like he's going anywhere" Sonny sighs "He might come to his senses yet."

"I doubt that!" Ray frowns

"Well I've never seen him like this that's for sure."

"Yeah well, we have. So, don't worry." Sonny shrugs at him dismissively "Though, I gotta say it's been a while. Not since the last time she left. That really messed with his head then." Sonny shakes his head and lets out deep resigned sigh. "Still it was always gonna end up like, anytime she's involved."

A large group of girls arrive at the bar, all giggles and talking. They smile at the guys as they walk past. Clay looks back at them and smiles and they give him another smile back. Sonny laughs and shakes his head. "Hey poster boy concentrate on the task in hand" He pushes another beer down the bar to him.

One of the friends of the girl group arrives late. She's tall, long brown hair which is tied back in a ponytail and as she walks past Jason all he catches the view of her back. He stops in his tracks and turns from the woman he's currently draped over " CJ hey!..HEY!" he stumbles over the stool and grabs at the woman.

"What the fuck?! Get your hands the hell off me!"

"Sorry, I'm. sorry! I thought you were...never mind! I'm sorry!" He stumbles and slurs

Ray steps in "Sorry, my apologies. My friend he um…he thought you were someone else. Sorry again."

She rolls her eyes " Yeah well tell him to watch himself. And don't you think he's had enough to drink?"

The blonde woman Jason was all over puts her arms round his neck and kisses his cheek. "Oh baby, why don't we go back to yours?"

"Get the hell off me!" he pulls her arms from round his neck and shoves her back.

"Woah there!" a guy at the bar steps up "What the hell are you doing man?" Sonny and Ray step in and make their presence felt pushing the guy away as she picks up her jacket "I thought you were up for it? Don't tell me, another loser as normal"

Jason gets up from his seat and just looks at her "Get lost!"

she looks him up and down "Whoever she is? WOW she must a done a real number on you!" she shakes her head "You know what, go to hell!"

He sits back on the stool at the bar. He has his aching head in his hands, as the drink takes more control and in his built-up temper he shoves all the glassware off the bar.

"Hey buddy!" a guy's gets up from his seat at the table "I've been watching you, what's your problem?"

Jason gets off his stool fronting him up and shoves him "Yeah you want some? Really, c'mon then let's go!"

Ray gets up grabbing hold of him "Woah, woah there! Jason, just settle down." He turns to the guy "It's okay, I'm sorry alright, we got this" Ray tries to calm everything "Jace just give it up now, man."

"We all good here!" Sonny backs the guy down "Look, why don't you go back to your drinks and be a good fella" The guy shakes his head annoyed, but he responds to Sonny's request and heads back to his table

"Where is she Ray?" He closes his eyes. He's exhausted and he drops his head in his hands "What the hell's gonna happen to her?"

"I don't know man, we'll find her." he sighs, unsure if he believes that they will "But brother, you can't carry on like this, you need to go home." Ray looks at Sonny "Come-on Jace, let's get you home man, before you do something you regret" Ray shakes his head deciding what to do "I'll take him to mine, until he sobers up. I can keep an eye on him there"

Sonny nods "Yeah good idea. Hey Jace, you go with Ray now"

Clay sits watching, he doesn't say a word, just drinks his beer and Sonny joins him at the bar as Ray walks the drunk and staggering Jason out.

Sonny picks up the shot on the table and necks it back "Jeez here we go again!" He looks around at Clay " Oh great, now what's with the face on you?" Sonny shakes his head and sighs he can't be dealing with all this tonight.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Ray gets his key for the door. Holding Jason against the door frame while he unlocks it "Steady just wait." Jason just nearly falls in the door "And... please be quiet!"

"Yeah..." Jason shouts " _Ssshhhh!_ "

Ray shakes his head, dropping him to the couch and the minute Jason lays his head down he's out for the count.

"Fun night?" a voice comes from the doorway as Naima smiles

Ray shakes his head "Hey baby! Did we wake you? "

Naima nods.

"Sorry!" Ray sighs

She puts her arms around his waist "So..." she looks at Jason "...I better get a blanket for sleeping beauty"

"Yeah good idea!"

Naima takes Jason's shoes off before she covers him over. Kissing his forehead. Ray sighs rubbing his face and head, he's feeling tired as he sits watching Jason sleep.

"He'll be okay!" she reassures him, rubbing his shoulders

"Will he? What if he goes off the rails like last time?"

"Then..." she kisses him "... you'll be there for him, like the friend that you are"

Ray holds her tight and kisses the top of her head. They sit holding each other, listing to the sound as one of the babies starts to cry. Ray rolls his eyes "I'll go! You go back to bed" he brushes her hair away from her face "You look tired."

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Ray goes the children's room. Both his own two are sleeping, but Jaycee is wide awake, and he's stood himself up in the cot. "Hey little man, what you doing awake?"

The baby puts his arms out and Ray picks him up, quietly taking him to the living room. Sitting himself in the chair cuddling him close to his chest and it's not long before they both fall asleep.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Jason coughs. He's awake and sitting up on the couch, rubbing his sore and aching head as Ray opens his eyes to the sound. Jaycee's still fast asleep on his chest "You good?" Ray frowns at him

Jason rubs his face and shakes his head. "No! Not really." he sniffs

"Good! You don't deserve to be." He sighs "Jace, you can't carry on like this, brother."

Naima comes in carrying their baby. Jason looks at them both "You want coffee?" She asks

Jason nods "Please. Look Naima, I'm sorry about this. It won't happen again."

She nods and sighs. She's tired after the disturbance of last night "Just make sure it doesn't."

They all sit quiet. Ray looks at Naima as she brings him some coffee. Jason's sitting just staring at Ray. There's the issue of Jaycee, it needs addressing but Jason's not really in the mood to discuss it. "So, you gonna explain what's going on here? I mean with him being here. I thought I told child services to take him?"

Naima answers him first "Ray did what he thought was for the best, Jason"

"Best? Best for who?" he frowns "You didn't think to say anything, like to tell me he was here? But instead you thought you'd keep quiet and lie."

"Jason, Ray didn't lie. He didn't have a reason to lie. He just did what he thought was best for J.C"

This is the first time Jason's heard anyone call him by his name, it takes him by surprise, makes him seem more real.

"Look man, I didn't want them sticking him in some children's home, not yet. Not when he's got ...family Ray pauses looking at Naima "Look... we're all family brother, we look out for each other. I thought that's what BRAVO do?"

Jason stands up "No, you know what, thanks for the coffee and use of the sofa but I need to go. Sorry Naima, I need to get back, check on my kids, and have a shower."

"Jason! Jason don't just leave. You need to..." Ray sighs. It's too late Jason' gone. The door has closes behind him and Naima takes a deep breath and sighs.

She looks at Ray "You need to speak with him."

"I know. I know!" He lets out a long breath "I'll sort this, I'm just not sure how yet."


	24. Chapter 24

**Take care of your son **

Sonny downs the shot of Tequila. "You not drinking there Blondie?" he's watching as Clay continues to turn the same bottle of beer around in his hand, over and over, just staring at the label "Okay..." he sighs "You got me. I'm listening, somethin bothering ya, so share"

Clay smiles "No nothing"

"Right!" he sighs again "I'm asking ya one more time, and if you say nothin again then that's it, I'm gonna hang you upside down and beat you. You understand me?" he shakes his head and downs the last of his row of shots. "Ah! Davis." he smiles "At last, someone's here with sense. Come talk to this man, while I get another drink" he pulls the chair out for her "Spenser now's time for you spill to her whatever's eatin at ya while I'm gone, then we can get on with drinking"

"Soooo?" she questions "Sonny right, something wrong?"

"No, nothing really" he takes a sip of beer. "Oh I don't know. I was just thinking about that kid. You know losing his mom, thinking back when my mom died" he shrugs at Davis "That kinda stuff"

Sonny and Davis look at each other "Okay then... I definitely need more tequila. All this emotional sharing is hard work" Sonny leaves the pair of them and heads to the bar

"Lisa, he's got no one now and I know how that feels"

"Yeah I know" she puts her hand on Clay's "But he'll be okay, and I'm sure they'll find him a foster place, very soon"

Clay nods and drinks some more "You think she'll be found?"

"Who C.J?" Davis frowns " I really can't say. I mean, there's not much to go on but we I guess we can't give up hope"

"Do you think any family will be found, to look after the boy?" he frowns "I mean what if he had some family? You think they'd family look after him, rather than go into foster care?"

"I don't know" She shrugs "Who knows if she has any? I guess Jason might know, but from what Mandy said, her file is classified. I couldn't track anything down" She frowns "Clay why are you so bothered about this? What's on your mind?"

He looks up as Sonny brings the beers and tequila back "Are we done with the feels now?"

Clay nods "Yeah sure we're done" He nods as he laughs, then he picks up a shot and necks it back, while Davis, unconvinced that he is okay, frowns.

"Good..."Sonny rubs his hands "so let's get drunk" Sonny smiles at Davis and she gives a half-hearted forced smile. Lisa continues to frown, she's worried that there's something more on his mind that he's not saying.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

 **2 days later**

The guys have been spun up and with Ray away, Naima's coping alone with the, three, children. She's also trying to sort the last arrangements for Jameelah's birthday party this afternoon. She's hoping desperately that Ray and the guys will make it back as she hates for him to miss family things, like his daughter's birthday.

Emma and Linda have offered to help her out. And their hosting the party at Jason's house. There's more room, and they're helping her with preparations, for which Naima's grateful. What with the three children to cope with, it's a pressure. Though, he fact they have JC staying with them, is something that Emma and Linda don't know yet.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Ray's back and Naima smiles "Hey honey, you got back just in time" As she looks up he has his head down and doesn't look happy "Ray?" she frowns, watching him "What's wrong baby? Everyone get back okay?" As she kisses his cheek she can feel there's something wrong. She puts the laundry down and gently touches his arm "Ray talk to me baby"

" Oh, yeah everyone's back fine. Don't worry." He kisses her forehead and smiles

"So, what's wrong?"

Hmmm! He scratches his cheek and rubs the back of his head "So... they um... they found a body, Blackburn just told us. On the Mexican border." He looks at the baby playing on the floor. "It's a woman's body"

For a moment she's confused but then as it dawns on her what he's saying, she takes a deep breath in "Oh no! You think it's her?"

"We don't know yet" He shrugs "They still awaiting confirmation." He frowns, biting his lip "Most likely though. Mandy's working on the intel and trying to get details but err ...the Mexican police, they're not really helpful. Not giving out any details and, well let's say Washington are being all confidential about her being missing, so it makes getting any information, slow. So, Mandy's gone down there. Now we're just waiting to hear."

She gulps. "How's Jason taken it?"

Ray shrugs "I don't know...He was quiet"

"Daddy! Daddy!" Jameelah runs to her dad "Daddy it's my birthday party today. We going to have cake, and I'm getting a horsey"

"Hey baby!" Ray frowns, he looks at Naima concerned "A horsey?... Really?"

Naima shakes her head "Jameelah we talked about this" She smiles "You are not getting a horse for your birthday"

Ray laughs, he holds Naima and kisses her. He smiles, being here with his family, its good and he feels better. Naima looks at the worry in her husband's face "You still wanna go ahead with this party?"

"Yeah! Yeah of course. No way I'm gonna miss this baby. Look, I'll grab a shower and some sleep, then I'll get ready"

"I'll fix you something to eat first" she smiles.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Linda puts down the phone. "That was Naima, she's just checking about the party this afternoon"

Emma's watching her dad drinking beer on the couch, staring at the TV, randomly flicking the channels. "Grandma, is he okay?"

"He'll be fine darling" she smiles. Truth though is different, Linda she has no idea what's going on with him. She decides that for everyone, he's best left alone for a while "Let's get these balloons and food done. They'll soon be here"

Emma scatters some of the balloons around the living room. As Jason looks up at her "What's going on? What the hell is all this stuff?" His tone is aggressive, and he's drunk so he's not in the mood to speak nicely.

"For Jameelah's birthday, party" Emma smiles

"Jameelah's what?! What party? Why the hell are they having a party here?"

"We thought it would be nice to offer to help Naima out" she gulps. She can tell her Dads not happy "We have more room, for the children to run around"

Linda enters the room and frowns at her son. His mood concerning her "Jason, son, is there something wrong?"

Jason stares at her "Well, no one told me!"

"You were told, I told you. But you've been away, so you may have forgotten. It isn't a problem is it?"

"I'm going out!"

"NO!" Linda changes tone with him "I'm getting fed up with this constant self-pity" she sighs "Jason your friends are coming for their daughter's birthday and you will go clean yourself up and be here for them."

He stares at the beer pack he has on the table. "No!" he picks up the beers, taking them with him as he heads to the garage for some peace.

She closes her eyes, giving a long-frustrated sigh. "What're we going to do with him?"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

People start to arrive for the party and Naima is there with her two children. She left Ray, so he could sleep a while longer and wait for the babysitter who's coming to look after JC, they felt that was best given the circumstances, that they would leave him behind for today.

Sonny's running around the garden with kids, spraying them with a water gun. Clay smiling watching them having fun. The other kids' parents are all out in the garden. It's a happy noisy atmosphere.

"Thanks Linda, for doing this. I'm so grateful. It's been such a huge help" Naima smiles

"You are more than welcome, my dear" She pats her on the arm "You know I think it's nice, to have some fun in the house for a change"

"How's he doing? Jason I mean."

Linda gives Naima a look Hmmm! "Not so good!" They both look up as Jason finally surfaces from the garage. He still hasn't washed, and heads straight to the fridge for more beers. "Jason please don't." his mother pleads with him "Not today!"

"I'm getting some food! Am I allowed to get food? After all, I thought this was _my_ house!"

She shakes her head, she's disappointed with his attitude "I'm not getting into this with you right now"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Ray opens the front door and heads into the house. He's carrying a sleeping Jaycee. Naima frowns. He heads over "Hey, so what's going on?" she whispers "I thought we agreed it was best that he didn't come. What's everyone going to say?"

"Sorry, but the sitter called sick, so what could I do?" he shrugs "I didn't wanna not come"

She bites her cheek "What're we going to say?"

He shrugs "It will be fine, don't worry" he kisses her and laughs "So many kids, perhaps no one will notice!"

Clay and Davis look at them in the doorway as Sonny comes over "What's going on?" he scowls at Ray "I thought he was in foster care"

"He is... kinda. It's just, it's with us."

"Daddy! Daddy look a horsey" Jameelah holds up a large toy soft horse, one of her birthday gifts

"That's beautiful darling" he bends down to her and gives her a kiss

"Jaycee look, my horsey" she says to the little boy as he opens his sleepy eyes. Seeing Ray with his family, it's nice and he gives him a reassuring smile  
"Here give the little fella here. I'll take him, while you sort her out. Ray... you know, it's a good thing you did here!"

"Thanks brother"

Sonny lift him gently from Ray's arms "C'mon little man, Uncle Sonny take you to get something to eat. You want cake, yeah? You hungry ? Cos Uncle Sonny sure is."

Ray smiles, as Naima puts her arm around her husband's waist "I love you!"

Clay looks at the floor. He's stood back drinking his beer, just watching what's going on. Jason's back to get some of the food on the table and he frowns as he looks at Sonny holding the child. Then he looks at Ray and Naima "What the hell's he doing here? Why's he not with child services?"

"Not now Jason!" Ray shakes his head

"She's gone, you know that! So, there's now no reason for you to keep him now. You need to hand him back"

"Jason brother, don't make a scene in front of the kids. And anyway, you know you don't mean that?"

"Jason... "Davis coughs " it's not confirmed yet, that the body is her, we're still waiting to hear from Mandy. There's still hope"

"Yeah Jace, brother, just calm down." Sonny warns him "Don't forget... it's a kids party"

"Yeah a kids party ... in **_my_ **house!" she snaps back "Did anyone think to ask me? No! Oh, don't worry about asking Jason, cos he'll be fine"

Linda and Emma come through from the kitchen "What's going on here?" Linda frowns "Son, don't make a scene please."

"I said did anyone ask me _, if_ I wanted this in my house? "

Emma's embarrassed at her dad making a show of her in front of everyone "DAD!" and Linda's even more annoyed

"Jason what's going on here?" she frowns "You need to stop this shouting!"

"Look at you all, acting like everything's normal" he points around the room as they all silently look at each other.

Ray shakes his head as and Jameelah pulls a sad face "Mommy, am I not getting my birthday cake?"

"It's all fine honey!" she reassures her. "Ray do something."

"Why is Uncle Jason shouting?" the little girl looks sadly at her daddy.

"It's fine, of course you're getting cake. Everything's fine honey. Now take your horsey, go play outside with your friends and Mommy will be out in a minute" Naima reassures her as one of the other moms leads her by the hand to the garden.

The room is cleared except for Team and the wives. Linda and Emma stand in the doorway of the kitchen all looking at the drunk Jason, eating his food. Ray's not really sure what to do or say but Naima's fuming with Jason as she takes Jaycee from Sonny.

" _This!_... This has to stop! Jason, you need to stop this right now! Do you hear me Jason?"

"Naima, leave it" Ray calls her back

"No Ray! No, he needs to pull himself together and be the man that he is. Jason, you are the team leader, or are you not?" She looks him deep in the eye but just laughs at her which makes her even more angry "Right, fine!" She thrusts J.C into his arms. Jason tries to resist but she lets go forcing him to take him " _HOLD him!_ " she glares as she firmly demands that he takes the boy "Jason, hold him!"

He gulps and takes him "Why? What the hell do you want me to do with him?"

Linda frowns at the scene unfolding "What's going on, Naima? Jason, son, what is this?"

"Yes.." Naima takes a deep breath "..C.J might be gone, but you don't know that yet for sure" she sighs but continues with the lecture she's giving him "But _he's_ here! And what I do know is, he may not have his Mommy but... he does have his Daddy!"

"For your information" Jason glares at her for making a show of him " his _'Daddy'_ is dead! Oh, did Ray forget to tell you that?" he gives her an angry stare "And I don't appreciate being spoken to like this, it's none of you damn business how I act!"

"Really!?" she's annoyed with him now "You _really_ believe that, about his daddy?"

Ray gets hold of Naima pulling her away he can see how angry Jason is "Just leave it. Naima, please."

 _"No_ Ray! _He_ needs to sort himself out and he needs to stop moping around. Jason get yourself together. You're no use to anyone like this." She keeps looking him in the eye, but he looks away avoiding her stare "You know I certainly don't trust you with my husband's life in this state." Tears prick her eyes; she can't believe she's had to say that to him. Ray scratches his neck, he fells awkward, he knows she's right, but he also knows that Jason's not taking this well, that her words sting. "Jason, pull yourself together. You're acting like you love her so much, well then prove it. Prove it by taking care of _your_ child!"

He frowns staring hard at her just as J.C starts to cry. Jason tries to hand him back "He's nothing to do with me! He had a father. He needs to go to child services."

Naima folds her arms, unwilling to take him back as Jason still thrusts him forwards to towards her. Ray's rubs his forehead and sighs while he's working out what to do or at least say. Naima sighs a long deep breath "Really? You say he had a father." she looks at Ray "Ray, say something!"

Ray still feels awkward as Naima's willing him to speak up. He thinks carefully before he speaks, knowing his words will change everything  
"He wasn't... Castle, he um... he wasn't his father." he sighs "He told me, that night at the gala, when we were first talking. He told me he wasn't his biological father!"

Jason looks up from the floor to stare at Ray, he swallows hard as the reality of possibility hits him. "So, what the hell are you sayin?"

Seeing the confused, forlorn look now crossing his face make Naima softens her tone. She puts her hand on Jason's cheek "Jason, you need to sober up, and then sort _your_ son out!" she smiles.

"Naima!" he laughs "My Son? what the hell are you saying?" he stares at her but she just nods "You're saying he's my son? I mean that's ridiculous and even if he was, I can't look after him" he shakes his head "Not with my job and everything else. How the hell can I care for a small child?"

"You can, because he needs you." she smiles. She feels so sorry for him now and the harsh words she spoke "Jason we'll help you. You know that, all of us, we'll all be here to help you."

"Daddy come see the pinata" Jameelah runs in grabbing her father's arm. Ray frowns at Jason trying to reassure him

"Okay honey, Daddy's now coming!" Ray leaves with his daughter, taking her outside.

Naima smiles at Jason, touching Jaycee's cheek "It will all be okay, you'll see. Just get to know your son." She kisses his cheek then follows Ray outside, Sonny and Davis follow her.

Clay waits a moment, rubbing the side of his head he's watching Jason standing there holding the little boy. He swigs his beer back standing the empty bottle on the table then he also heads outside. Jason's left alone, still holding the little boy.

Linda looks at him and frowns "Jason, son, what's going on?"

"Don't!" he sighs "Don't' say anything! I need some time alone"

He shakes his head. Jaycee has nuzzled his head into Jason neck and gone to sleep. He takes a deep breath and pulls the little one closer, holding him, protectively wrapping his arms around. He heads to the bedroom for some peace and quiet.

He lays down on the bed with Jaycee. Him on his side, looking at the little boy, studying and touching his face, then he picks him up and lays on his back with him lying on his chest, putting his arms around him watching a the little one sleeps.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Blackburn knocks on the front door of Jason's house. Clay and Sonny are getting more beers and they let him in. He comes in carrying a brown cardboard filing box. "Hey!" he acknowledges the guys

"Hey boss!" Sonny frowns, curious at the sight of the large box "What's that?"

"Um..." Eric gulps "it's...err well it's ..some of CJ's personal effects. From the hotel where she stayed, before the funeral" He scratches his head "I kinda wasn't sure what to do with them so I...I thought Jason might want them?"

Sonny and Clay look at each other, they don't know what he should have done with them either "Yeah that's probably the best idea! You wanna beer?"

"Yeah, that be good thanks. So, where is everyone?"

"Outside with the kids, and um... Jason's, through there in the bedroom."

Eric nods just as his phone rings "Oh cheers!" Sonny hands him a beer "Sorry I need to take this. ...Hey Mandy, hi" he walks off into the kitchen.

Clay and Sonny look at each other, they don't say a word but as they both drinks. They can feel their adrenaline rise at the sound of Mandy's name and Sonny looks at Clay "That Miss Mandy?"

Clay nods "Sounds like it!"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Hearing the voices in the living room Jason's back from the bedroom, still carrying the little one.

"You good?" Sonny asks

Jason nods "Yeah, you got one of those going spare?"

"Sure thing." Sonny hands him a beer.

"What's that?" Jason points at the box

"Um...Blackburn brought it, it's...it's some of CJ's personal stuff. He thought you might want it?"

Jason nods as he partially opens the lid. He can see her thing in the bottom of the box. He lets the lid drop, it's not something he wants to look at it or think about right now.

"Okay, thanks for letting me know" Blackburn hangs up the call. He lets out a big sigh and takes a chug on his beer heading back into the living room to the guys

Ray's back from the garden he looks at Jason "We good?"

"Yeah, we're good!" Jason smiles having calmed down. "Eric, what's up?" he can see by his face he has something to tell. He frowns "You got some news?"

"Um ...yeah. That was Mandy... they've been to the border." Jason takes a sharp intake of breath. The others all look at each other and collectively hold their breath preparing for the worst. "The body they recovered..." He drinks from his beer. "it wasn't her!"

Jason closes his eyes and lets out a sigh. They all exchange relieved glances. _"Phew!_ Thank God!" He smiles relieved and kisses J.C's head

Sonny lets out a long sigh " _Woah!_ That's good then, I mean it's good for the kid!"

Jameelah runs back in with some cake and hands it to Jason "That's for J.C" she smiles.

Jason smiles back at her "Thanks!"

Ray looks at him "Hey Jace, brother, we got this, okay?"

Jason nods. "Yeah, we have!"

Clay frowns, he's still deep in thought. He does just about manage to raise a smile but taking another beer he disappears quietly out into the garden to be on his own.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**


	25. Chapter 25

**Chapter 25: Clay what are you doing?**

** Unnamed hotel on the Mexican border **

Mandy opens her eyes, wrapped only in the white cotton bed sheet she turns over. Running her hand up and down the arm that's draped over her waist, she smiles "You know I always said there had to be some pleasures in Mexico"

 _Mmmm!_ "You know, I think I must agree with you Miss Ellis" the cool English voice next to her replies. He kisses her neck then follows a trail down along her spine.

"Reuben..." she turns around to face him ".. you need to stop. You know I have a flight to catch"

 _Hmmm!_ "Yes, that's a shame but I do remember you said that." he leans forward and kisses her full on the lips "Best not make you too late then."

She smiles as he rolls her over on her back " _Mmmm!_ Reuben!" she groans as they continue from where they left off late last night.

Eventually she surfaces from under his body and sneaks a look at the time on her phone _Mmmm!_ she sighs "You know I- I really must go. I don't want to miss my flight."

"Shame, but if you have to, you have to" he continues to kiss her "Still, it's been a really worthwhile trip. Positive outcome all round as I see it" he smiles

"Reuben, why did you come down here, to Mexico? Was it for business or pleasure?"

He smiles watching her face "Oh, always a bit of both. You should know that Mandy. It's all about balance in life. You can never have one without the other."

"Reuben, I hope you're not playing me Reuben? " She frowns as she sits up and looks him in the eye "What the hell are you up to? Why did you come here?"

"Mandy, what have I told you before, about asking too many questions?" She's annoyed and feels he's playing with her. She gets up and starts to get dressed. He doesn't move, just lays in the bed, only just covered by the sheet she just left. "Mandy wait! Before you go..." he reaches in his jacket pocket hanging on the chair beside the bed "..I have something for you."

She frowns, as he hands her a small black memory stick "Call it a gift, if you like. A one of a kind thank you. Check it out. See what you think you'll like it" he smiles. As she reaches down for the stick, he grabs her hand and pulls her to sitting on the bed and kisses her again

She furrows her head, as she looks at it in her hand "A _gift_? A gift of what?"

"It's just a video that I thought a keen-eyed person like you, might like to take a look at" he smiles "You'll find it of interest, I'm sure of that" He smiles at the ever deepening frown on Mandy's face "I'll leave it with you to decide what to do with it, but the caveat is, if you are ever in the position to return the favour, with something that you think might interest me, then I would appreciate if you return the courtesy"

She looks at him puzzled. She's intrigued "What's this about?" she frowns "This was business not pleasure then You got me here to give me this?"

"Oh no Mandy, _this_ this was purely pleasure." he kisses her "I'm even hoping we might do this again, soon" He pushes her hair back off her shoulder and pulls her down to kiss again

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Clay's standing in the corner of the garden, by himself. He's drinking from the bottle of beer as Davis wanders over to join him. She smiles as they both watch the kids running around with Sonny. Clay smiles as he watches them spray him with water from the water guns "You ever think about having kids?" he frowns as he looks at Lisa.

"Me? No, no not really. Well, I suppose maybe... one day I guess." She frowns wondering about the question "I don't know. It's not something I've given much thought too. I mean, it's not really compatible with this career. Well not now. How about you?"

"Yeah, I suppose, yeah one day it would be nice. I don't know" He takes a swig of his beer "I suppose thinking about it, it's probably easier for me, than you, if you know what I mean"

"Yeah, need I'd to be in a relationship first though" she laughs "I mean doing this job and being a single parent. Never gonna be easy"  
She drinks from her beer as she watches him "This is a tough life, to throw a kid in the mix, Wow!" She sighs "That's a whole other game" She pauses looking at Sonny still running around "You need a good support network behind you to continue this life with kids. I mean Jason's gonna be okay. I guess. I mean, he has lots of help, his Mom, Naima and even Emma. But the likes of me and you.." she looks at Clay "..well it's not like we have any of that help, right. Family to help with kids I mean."

"Yeah, yeah I suppose you're right" he sighs. They both laugh watching as one the kids brings Sonny crashing down on the ground, she shakes her head smiling as he gets up.

Clay watches her smiling "You two get on well"

"Yeah I suppose" she nervously looks down "Never thought about it really. He makes me laugh but he's no different than anyone else"

"You know, she told me" He doesn't look at Davis, just continues staring forward watching the kids and Sonny weaving around on the grass

"Told you?" Davis frowns, puzzled "Who? Who told you what? Clay I don't understand what you mean"

"C.J..." he pauses "...she told me about you and Sonny. The last night she was at mine before she...took the overdose."

Lisa doesn't know where to look "Clay I don't know what she told you what about me and Sonny. But there's nothing to tell" She laughs nervously trying to dismiss it. Although inside she is suddenly panicked

"She said she saw you, kissing, in your kitchen, when she slept on the couch, the night she got drunk at the bar"

"I don't know what she thought she saw but she was wrong" she protests

"Yeah, that's what I told her, they wouldn't. They wouldn't because it would be too much to risk" he smiles "but if you were, then you know... I wouldn't ever tell anyone, right."

She nods and drinks her beer; she wonders why Clay's bringing it up then now and she's worried that someone else knows. _How much longer would it stay a secret?_ Davis is annoyed "Yeah well it wasn't down to her to say anything. She got it wrong"

"Did you know..."Clay sighs, he bites his lip thinking but he has to share his secret with someone ".. she lost my baby?"

"She _what?"_ Lisa stops drinking and turns to look at him. She's shocked by his revelation "Clay she what?!"

"Sonny didn't tell you?" he frowns looking at her "Yeah... yeah the Nigeria op, she lost it, what with her injuries" he drinks a long drink from the bottle of beer "You know, she said she didn't know. She didn't know she was pregnant, before she went on that op. But who knows maybe she did, and she didn't care? There's days like today that I wonder, what if? What if she hadn't lost it? How different things might be now."

"WOW!" Davis doesn't know what to say "No, no I didn't know, I mean if Sonny knew he never said anything to me. Clay, you can't think like that though. You'll drive yourself crazy and it won't bring her back"

"No, I know. I'm just talking out loud." he smiles "Oh and Davis, what I just told you, no one, except Sonny, knows. "

"Probably best to keep it that way " She smiles. She's wondering why Sonny never told her and she's also worried about Clay. "It'll be okay. It will. It'll all get better in time " she puts her hand on his arm "What's meant to be, will be."

"I know" he sighs shaking his empty bottle "Looks like I need another beer"

 _SHIT!_ She sighs as Clay walks away. She pulls her hand through her hair. Her mind starting to churn, her thoughts going around in her head  
"Oh my god!" She takes a breath as something starts to dawn on her.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

"DAD!... DAD! Wake up!" Emma's standing in the bedroom doorway as Jason comes around from his deep sleep

"Emma?! What? What is it?"

"He's crying again!" she sighs as she lifts JC on to the bed beside him

Jason looks at his phone clock. 02:16 _Shit!_ He puts his head back in the pillow _Urggghh!_ "JC why?!" He rubs his forehead trying to wake up "C'mon little man, it's still sleep time." But his words and soothing actions don't change anything and J.C keeps crying. "Okay ... okay, let's get you some milk. Yeah you want milk ?" he smiles "Yeah milk, c'mon!"

He warm some mill and puts it one of the plastic baby cups' he has in the cabinet. Then he carries him to the couch sitting him down in among the pillows, settles himself and flicks the hockey reruns on the TV. He lays back while JC leans against him, drinking his milk. Jason puts his arm around him and smiles. Then as he looks down, under the table he spots the brown storage box, the one with C.J's belongings in. He coughs as he pulls it out and just sits staring at it. Then he leans his head back. He can't open it and pushes it back under the table with his foot, but he can't stop staring at it.

Jaycee's fallen asleep beside him and he moves him carefully at the bottom of the couch, laying him flat. He then pulls the brown box out and takes a deep sigh as he finally opens the lid. Seeing her stuff in the bottom of the box, he pulls back, leaning back in the pillows he closes his eyes. Then taking a deep breath he empties the contents on to the floor.

Some hair elastics, he chucks those back in the box. Some newspaper clippings, he frowns. A makeup bag and deodorant, hairbrush, chewing gum, couple miniature whiskey bottles, he raises his eyes at those.

And then there in the bottom are her Navy dog tags. He picks them out and holds them. Just feeling them in his hand, looking at her name on them sends a wave of emotion through him. He gulps back the lump in his throat as he puts them round his neck.

The box is almost empty and all that's left is a black plastic flash drive which he picks up. It has sticker on the side saying baby pics and he looks at J.C, he thinks about it and puts it on the side table before he puts everything else back in the box and pushes under the table out of the way.

He relaxes back into the couch, his hand on the dog tags round his neck and thinks about her. Despite the protests he made, he's glad Blackburn stood BRAVO down for two weeks. Everything is catching up with him now. The lack of sleep is overwhelming and taking its toll. He sighs as he looks at the sleeping JC beside him "Hey there..." he smiles "you know, I think if you're gonna stay then we need to get some organized routine here. What do ya say?" he sighs, taking his small hand in his own "I think we have a problem and we need to work it,"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Mandy's still on her laptop. She's re-run the video several times. The beginning is a pretty gruesome watch. Showing the hostage receiving a severe beating. Though it's nothing she hasn't sat through before. She frowns, still puzzled at what she's supposed to be looking for as she goes over it step by step

 _Okay... Western journalist, hostage, Syria. So, what's so interesting about this Reuben?_ She questions herself over and over, as she watches it again for a third time. _So, I organise a hostage rescue, but as a target package this is pretty standard_. She frowns _Why would Reuben think this was something he had to give me?_

She sighs and pushes the laptop across the desk and takes a break. Davis enters the room pouring herself a coffee from the machine in the corner of the room " Mandy, you want a coffee?"

"Yeah! Yeah sure" she nods

"What're you up to?" Davis frowns looking that the stressed expression on her fact

"Oh, I was just trying to make some sense of this video footage. So far nothing. Anyway, what are you doing here?" she frowns at Davis "I thought Blackburn stood BRAVO down for two weeks, while Jason gets himself together."

"Bravo T1s yes. Support staff, um...no!" She laughs "We're not that lucky"

"Anyway, how's Jason holding up? I haven't seen him since I got back from Mexico"

"Yeah, yeah he's okay, I think. The others are helping him stay focused, plus with little one I don't think he's had much time" Davis checks the outer office then closes the office door "Between you and me, I think Clay's struggling a bit." she sighs "You know everyone's been so focused on Jason, that they all kinda forgot he was involved in this too"

 _"Hmmm!_ Yeah that's a difficult one" Mandy sighs "Jeez, that woman, she always did know how to leave a mess behind her."

"Anyway, what are you doing in here? New target package?" Davis leans over her shoulder

"Well I got given this. It's not exactly a target package as such, more of a hostage rescue. But ... yeah definitely a hostage we need to get out, and soon. Thing is I can't see anything about it that's not just a standard extraction" she shrugs

"And ." Davis looks at her puzzled " should it be? More than a standard extraction I mean"

"Well the guy that gave it to me, he said I'd be interested. Now normally he's not the type of guy that gives you something this basic." She smiles "He's a bit more, well... complicated than that. Something like this it would normally come through my usual channels but him giving it to me...it's strange" she sighs

Davis smiles "Really? So, he's exciting then?" she leans on her arms on the table listening "C'mon spill, who is he? I don't normally see a look like that on your face"

Mandy takes a deep breath and she blushes as she thinks about her time with Reuben "Well I guess he's more...a man of mystery!" she laughs her cheeks glowing red "But this, that he's given me. It doesn't excite me much and he assured me it would."

"Can I see?"

Mandy looks round "Sure, I can't see why not. It's nothing you'll not get to see at some point, when we follow up" She presses play and video starts to runt.

Davis scowls as she sits through it, the footage is shocking, but she continues to watch "Who's he?"

"He's a journo, went out there three years ago, from what I remember. Disappeared, kidnapped, believed dead. Now this video has surfaced but it's good, I mean he's alive. So, it's a good thing"

The video continues to play then stops and they play it again. Davis studies harder this time "What am I supposed to be looking for?" She frowns

"Anything. Anything out of the ordinary, something I missed"

"Like another hostage?" She points at the screen "Looks like other people in the room being held too" she frowns studying the figures in the background more "Wait! Look there! Oh my god. Stop!" Davis point and stares at the screen "Go back. Go back...back a bit more. Now stop! There!" she sighs as her and Mandy stare at the screen " Just there. Look! Is that..."

Mandy rewinds and moves it forward frame by frame this time "Oh my god, there! Shit! I never saw it in background" she sighs "Oh my God, no way! That's what he wanted me to see!"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-**

Clay lays back on his bed and closes his eyes. He can now see her standing there at the end of the bed. She's smiling, calling him, willing him back to bed. He can feel her touch on his skin, that feeling of excitement from touching her.

"CJ!... CJ!" he calls out. Then startled he opens his eyes wide. "SHIT! he rubs his face. He just can't get her out of his head, and he jumps up out of bed. He pulls on his pants and grabs his jacket from the chair "I need to find something to do. All this downtime is driving me crazy"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Jason's running around trying to find a shoe. Nappies in one hand and screaming tired child on his hip. Finally exhausted he caves in and sits down. "Shhh! Come on JC, please be quiet!" he sighs "What the hell do you want?"

He rubs his head as he sits J.C on the couch beside him, his hands squeezing at his temples, he lets out a long, exhausted sigh _Arrrghh!_ "Please, just give me a minute!" He snaps. JC's been crying on and off most of the night and just won't settle " _Shhh!_ Please quiet! Just give me a minute"

He can't take anymore, and he picks up the phone "Hey! You know what, I don't think I can do this!"

"Just stay calm. I'll be there, give me thirty minutes, and I'll come"

"Thanks!"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

The living room is tidy a last. They've moved the crib from Mikey's room into Jason's.

They've put together a plan of action for when they get spun up. Naima will look after J.C with her other children when it happens, and though she took a while to get her head around the whole situation. And she admits it's not ideal. Linda is offering and willing to help with him too.  
"He did not create this situation, and after all he's still my grandchild"

Even Emma's offered once a week baby-sitting. In exchange Jason has to take, her and Mikey, one day a month just the two of them and their Dad. She's actually quite taken with her new baby brother.

Naima hands Jason a bit of black plastic "I found that on the side when cleaning up. Looks important."

He looks at it. It's the flash drive from CJs box. He turns it over in his hand _Baby pics._ He puts it in his pocket for now. "Thanks Naima. Thanks for everything. I don't know what I would have done without you."

"Okay, so are we sorted now." she smiles "You know, it's all going to work out just fine."

Jason nods "Would be better if we could find her though, but...yeah, at least we're sorted. So, I guess then it's time we got back to work"

"Yes!" she nods "Yes it is! Jason ...I'm proud of you." She smiles, kissing his cheek "C.J would be too, you know, stepping up, taking care of him. It won't be easy, but at least you're trying" She smiles as she passes JC back to him "He's lucky to have such a great Dad!"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

He's making coffee in the kitchen the laptops on the counter. Emma's on the rug with J.C playing. He takes the flash drive out of his pocket and plugs it in to the side of the computer. He opens up the picture files on it and there, in large black and white is a pic of C.J holding a new-born baby.

 _Oh fuck!_ He shuts his eyes and closes the laptop lid, removing the flash drive. _Shit!_ He sighs. He looks at the flash drive and clips the end of the clip onto his key chain. It's been a good day but he's not ready for that. He sighs to himself "I'm not sure I'm ready for those yet!"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

"Okay... heads up Gentlemen!" Blackburn starts the briefing. They're back and ready for the spin up they've been summoned to. Sonny is so glad; he was going stir crazy with the downtime. Though having extra time with Davis had been nice.

"We'll Helo drop over the Afghan border. Infill details as discussed" Blackburn looks round the room "Okay... then it's wheels up in fourteen hours. Do what you need to do people. Let's get geared up!"

They all come away and start preparing, but Spenser stays at the table "You coming?" Davis frowns at him

"Yeah, um... " He smiles at her "I just wanna check something on computer. I'll be right there."

"You okay?" she's concerned as he seems apprehensive

"Yeah sure! Like I said, I'll be right there" He moves seats and sits at the computer opposite the door, so that he can see who comes in. But he makes sure that no one can see the screen on his laptop. He swallows nervously as he starts to type. He's anxious and stops, taking his hand off the keyboard, letting out a deep sigh. "Okay, let's just do this."

 _GOOGLE : What's needed for a paternity test?_

He looks up at the door as the results come up, and he starts to scroll through the results. He clicks to read on some local details. Then he looks up as Davis startles him, as she comes back into the room. He looks up nervously.

"Blackburn forgot this!" She smiles as she picks up the file off the table. "Hey, you sure you're okay? There something you need some help with?"

"Err... no! No, I'm fine!" He slams the laptop lid shut

"Clay, Clay are you okay?"

"Yeah sure!" he smiles "Just um...just needed an address for something. Right, best get on. We need to get ready to go!"

"Okay!" she smiles "But if you need to talk, then you know I'm here."

"Yeah sure! Thanks. Right, I need to go get prepped"

 _Hmm! What the hell's he up to? Somethings not right!_ She frowns. She nervously, bites her lip and looks at the door. She feels a little bit guilty checking up on him, but she opens the laptop he was using. She does a quick search of the history files Oh Jeez!...Shit! She sighs "Clay, what the hell are you doin'?"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sonny catches her as she leaves the office "I'm going to get some fried chicken you want some before I go?" She smiles but it's a worried smile and it gets Sonny questioning her "Hey Davis you okay? What's wrong?"

"Nothing" she shakes her head

"Davis don't lie to me."

"No, it's nothing. Nothing to worry about. Sonny, it's fine, I'm just gonna miss ya that's all"

"Well you know we have a few hours before I go" he smiles "We could um... grab some chicken, then have a couple of hours of hot chicken at my place, if you wanted?" he winks

"Maybe!" she smiles "

"Maybe? Just a maybe? What the hell's that mean?"

"It means yeah, yeah that would be good. But... Sonny we have to be careful"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Davis looks at her phone clock "You know we need to head back soon"

"Uh huh! " Sonny's still half asleep

"Sonny are you listening to me?" she kisses him

"uh huh!"

"Uh huh! And that's all you gotta say? C'mon, get up!" He looks at her as she kisses him again

"Oh..." He smiles "I'm _up_ already!"

She frowns at him "I don't mean _that_ " she blushes " I mean get, dressed, for work!"

"Oh yeah that!" _Hmmm! "_ You know maybe we could .. just you know again ... first"

She giggles as starts kissing her as rolls on top " _SONNY!_ Stop!"

"What? Don't tell me you wanna go work instead?" He runs his hand down over her curves

" _Mmmm!_ Would I be weird if I said yes?" she smiles and kisses him

" _Uh Huh! V_ ery weird! But I don't think you seriously wanna go to work do you? No, you come here first."

She sighs as they lay there in each other's arms. She's looking up at the ceiling. "What're you thinking about there, Davis? I can hear your cogs tickin'!"

"Nothing!"

"What is it with all this _nothing_ that people are thinking about all the time?"

He hears her swallow nervously as she also lets out a long sigh "Spenser, knows about us"

"What!? How the hell!"

"C.J! She told him"

"And how the hell did she know?"

"She saw us in the kitchen, that night we brought her back drunk. Oh, she made sure I knew that she knew. I didn't know she'd told Clay though"

"And you didn't think to tell me this? That she knew. Jeez Davis ... SHIT!"

"He says he won't say anything. He um... he also told me you knew about the baby, _his_ baby the one that CJ miscarried"

"He did?" _Hmmmm! H_ e sighs "Jeez, what a fuckin' mess, this all is!"

"It gets worse." Davis frowns

"Worse! How the hell can it get any worse?"

"Okay, but you can't mention this to anyone" she looks at him " _ANYONE!_ Sonny I mean it"

"You know you can trust me Davis. You have my word. Just tell me"

"He was on the computer in the briefing room, and well... when I checked the history after he left" She frowns "I know I shouldn't have done but I was worried and turns out with good reason. He was searching for paternity tests!"

"What the hell does he want a paternity test for?"

"Sonny think about it! What do you think he wants one for?"

"Oh, Holy SHIT!" he frowns " Jeez! Nah... nah nah. No, no this is not happenin"

"I don't know why any of us didn't think about it. I mean, I guess we just all assumed Jason right? but.. what if "

"Yeah but, I mean she made Jason guardian, so that must be the truth! This can't be right?"

"Sonny what if it's not?" she frowns "What if Clay is JCs father? Then what. " She's waiting for a reaction " Sonny it'll end his career. Jason can do it, he has family, a support network, but Clay? He doesn't have anything like that. Sonny I'm not sure he's thinking this through. You need to speak to him"

"It's not him coping with a baby I'm worried about. It's what the hell Jason's gonna say if he finds out!" Sonny sits up and rubs his head "Holy crap! How the hell am I gonna speak to him about this?" he sighs "Jesus! I need a drink"

" Sonny you can't drink. You're now about to leave"

"Yeah, I know, but it don't mean I don't want one though. This kinda thing, it makes me nervous" he thinks for a minute "Okay...look, we hold off for now. We don't say anythin to anyone" he frowns at her "We'll deal with it when we get back!"

"Yeah, yeah I guess you're right"

"So, before we go. there anything else you need to unburden on me?"

"No!" she shakes her head nervously. She was going to tell him about the video of Mandy's but for now she decides it's best not to.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o**


	26. Chapter 26

**Chapter 26: This is Nancy**

They're back at base after the mission.

Showered and dressed Jason comes back in the office he grabs a coffee from the machine "Hey Davis, just wanted to ask you something, any chance you could watch J.C for a few hours tomorrow. Just um... Emma's got a recital and was gonna go watch. Then take her and Mikey bowling after. Give them some _me time_ as Emma calls it " he smiles

"Um ... well I do have something planned but I may be able to juggle"

" No, no I don't wanna put you out. I can take him with us...so don't worry"

Clay looks up from computer "Hey you know, I'm free I could have him. I mean I'll look after him, if it's only a couple hours" he shrugs " I'm sure I can manage a small child for a few hours" He smiles "And if it would help you out"

"You?" Jason looks around at him, frowning

"Yeah sure how hard can it be?"

"Okay!" Jason's puzzled "You sure you can do this? "

"Yeah sure. Look, it'll be fun, right?" Spenser shrugs and smiles as Davis looks at Jason

"Okay, well you're on. That'd be great" he nods "say pick him up about eleven?"

Spenser nods "Yeah sure, that's perfect"

"Okay, well I'll have him ready. Oh, and Clay... thanks!" Jason looks at his watch "Shit! I better go, gotta pick him up from Naima. I'll speak with you tomorrow"

"You sure about that ?" Davis frowns but she doesn't look up from her computer

"Yeah, yeah I'm sure. It'll be fun" He grabs his keys and phone "Look, I'm heading off now. I got some calls to make"

Davis shakes her head she's not sure that it's a good idea for Clay to spend time alone with JC, but nothing she can do now to stop it.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay's' in the corridor on his phone "Yeah so that appointments confirmed? Tomorrow 13:00 Dr Khan's office" he's listening ..."Yeah I'll be there... thanks" he swallows nervously and checks around the corridor _Phew!_ He sighs J _eez what the hell are you doing Clay?_ His hands are shaking, as nerves kick in.

Davis puts her head against the back of the office door. She closes it quietly behind her. She overheard Spenser's conversation "Oh shit Clay, what the hell are you doing?"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Davis waits in the street outside the Doctors office, she paces up and down the sidewalk then she spots Clay coming out of the building, he's carrying J.C. As he looks up he sees her and he's angry "Oh my god, Davis!... What the hell, are you spying on me now? _What_ are you doing here?"

"What am I doing here? What the hell are you doing Clay? Do you know how stupid this is?" she stares at him

"Yeah! Yeah, but I had to know"

She shakes her head "Well? What did you find out?"

"They can't do it!" He sighs "I um... I have to have the mother's, or an active guardian, consent. For them to take his blood sample" he shakes his head "I can't believe it cos I'm never gonna get that am I?"

"Clay, do you really think he's yours? I mean enough to risk Jason finding out?"

"I don't know. But I just need to know, for sure if he really is Jason's or ... or if he could be mine."

"Clay you need to stop and think about this. It's such a big commitment. I mean what about your career. What about being an operator? You spent your whole life wanting to be a SEAL and now, you're just gonna give it up?"

"I don't know. I hadn't thought that far" He looks at the time on his watch "Look, I have to get him back" he frowns looking at her "Davis this needs to stay between us. Be one of our secrets"

"Sure.. but Clay.." She shakes her head. "I hope you know what you're doing "

o-o-o-o-o-o

On the way back to his apartment he stops at the grocery store. He just finishes up a conversation with Jason. He's asking him to hold onto JC for another hour as he wants to take Mikey and Emma for something to eat. "Sure thing!" Clay offers, smiling at the thought of having more time with the boy. He feels closer to CJ when he's around.

As they walk around the store getting some groceries. Clay has J.C in the cart. And as they wander up and down the isles Clay notices the cute looking blonde who appears to be following behind. She's also grocery shopping and every now and again she looks up, giving a smile to JC. The baby smiles back. Finally feeling confident she speaks to Clay "So, he yours?"

"Um..."Clay hesitate. Then he nods "yeah!" _Oh god!_ He questions himself. _What the fuck are you saying?"_

"Yeah .." she smiles at the both of them "yeah you can see, in his eyes. You're very similar"

"Um.. yeah everyone says that" Spenser, digging himself a bigger hole, awkwardly smiles back

"You know it's not very often that you see a dad out shopping with a baby alone" She smiles putting her hand out "Oh, I'm Nancy by the way"

"Hey Nancy"

"You know your wife, she's a lucky woman Having a man, who'll go do groceries and take baby. You don't always get that It's nice"

"Oh um... I don't have a wife"

"Oh... oh I'm sorry. You're a single dad?" She frowns

He nods "Yeah pretty much" he smiles back. _Oh my god... Spenser, what the hell are you doing?_

"Look, I'm not normally this forward. In fact, never. But um... would you like to get a coffee. There's a place just across the street. I'll understand if you wanna say no. I mean... I'm just trying to live by my new motto. Cease the moment." She laughs

Clay smiles. He thinks for a moment. Looking at her, all blonde hair, tight dress. Not his normal type of woman but there's something about her he likes. "Okay!" he grins "Yeah sure. Why the hell not. We've got some time before we have to get back "

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They walk across road to the coffee shop. Where they the next hour chatting over coffee. She seems genuinely nice and good fun. They decide to exchange numbers, agreeing to meet for a drink later in the week. He stands up as she kisses him goodbye on the cheek. Then as he gets JC ready to leave the waitress comes over with the check

"Hey!" she smiles "So, he yours?" she rubs her finger on JCs cheek

"um... yes" he lies again

"Well he sure is cute, like his daddy" she smiles, chewing her gum as she picks up Clay's tab "So, you married?"

"Um...no. No, I'm not"

She smiles again and writing a number on a napkin she hands it to Clay, "call if you wanna another coffee"

Clay smiles "Hey J.C, looks like you're a bit of a girl magnet" He shakes his head laughing.

As they leave the coffee shop to head back to Clay's truck he notices a sign in the next-door pharmacy window

HOME TEST KITS: Testing pregnancy / DNA / paternity test kit - available here!

He frowns. Reading the poster, he takes a deep breath, pushing open the door, he enters.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Back at in his apartment, he pushes the samples into the envelope and seals it. He sighs, taking a minute to think. Wondering if he should even be doing this. If it was even legal. Thinking about how mad Jason would be if he ever found out. "Hey... " he smiles at JC "This has to stay between you and me, for now at least. I'm sorry but I have to know." He kisses his head, and then checks the time "Right, we better get you back to your daddy"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason lets out a long sigh. It's been a long, but good day with his kids. He checks in on Mikey who's sleeping, and he covers him over before he checks on Emma's room. She's still up, using her laptop "Hey.. don't be up all night!"

"Dad!" she sighs rolling her eyes "How old do you think I am" She smiles "Dad... good night!"

"Good night"

Jason smiles, as he lays himself down in the bed. He feels contented. Everything with all of his kids seems good right now. He checks through the rails on the crib. He can see JC sound asleep "Wonder how long that will last?" he smiles, checking the time on his phone.

He pulls the laptop onto the bed beside him and plugs in the flash drive. He feels ready to open the files now. Letting out a long sigh, preparing himself.

The files all open up on the screen. And he clicks randomly on the picture files opening them. Lots of new-born pics of JC and some of him with CJ. As he sees her face on the screen he touches it gently with if fingers on the screen, He sends a couple of the pictures to keep on his cell phone. Then he continues to randomly open them, back and forward until he's been through the list.

He frowns, clicking as one of the files won't open. She's labelled it differently. _Shopping List_ "What the hell!?" he looks confused, clicking again and again but it still won't open, asking for a _password file._ and a _key pass_ "This is weird" Jason now notices it's a different format to the other picture files is also a large compressed file meaning it contains much more information than anything else on there

He tries a couple of various things to open it, but nothing works _hmmmm!_ He sighs frustrated. He's really confused by it. He looks up some of the file information, noticing it taking up most of the storage on the device. "What the hell is this?" He frowns tapping his fingers on the keyboard. He wonders if the file is corrupted as all the other files have no problem opening.

He decides, as it's late to takes the flash drive out, clipping it back on his key ring. He sits in the bed still thinking the file, still bothering him he plugs it in again and this time he tries a few passwords. But nothing works. The same messages appearing "What the hell is a shopping list? A shopping list for what?"

He shakes his head, takes at deep breath, rubbing his face. He's tired and now shuts the laptop down and closes his eyes

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Mandy's in her office when she gets a knock on the door. "Bernard!" she smiles "Wow! This is a surprise. Come in. What can I do for you? You don't venture these waters much nowadays"

"Nope not anymore, but I have um...a.…a special request, for your attention" he frowns, smiling at her "Hostage I need retrieving. Just a standard snatch and grab. You got a team ready to go?"

"Wow!" She's puzzled "You came in person for something like this? So, what about it warrants your personal attention ?"

He coughs and fidgets in the chair "It's a journalist. Was kidnapped, in Syria, three years ago."

She frowns now curious "Okay so now you have my attention"

He coughs again, checking around the doorway that's still open "Look, why don't we go have lunch and we can talk, away from the office"

"Okay!" Mandy looks confused but she shuts her laptop down and picks up her coat "I'm interested!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"I'll have the tuna salad" she orders "and a glass of mineral water. Thanks" she smiles at the waitress

"And I'll have... a whiskey on the rocks and a... sirloin, rare" he smiles handing the menu back "Expenses, may as well" he smiles. He takes a breath "Look I can't tell you why this suddenly got pushed to the front of the line" he pauses "Thanks" he smiles again as the whiskey arrives.  
He takes a large sip "All I've got, is the vaguest of explanations. So here it is. He's the son, of a donor, some media rag that running PR for a senator's campaign. And it would .. grease wheels in Washington. If he was to be brought home" he shrugs "That would be the favor, to me! But um.. of course, if there were say, any other unfortunates. That you managed to pick up, but that don't have major donors, in their family, well I'm sure there is a great amount of PR that the machine could produce from it" he smiles taking another large gulp of whiskey.

Mandy frowns at him. He notices the curious look she's giving him Oh c'mon Mandy, you know how this works... big PR campaign. How intelligence agencies actually did some good. That kinda positive bullshit!" He can tell she still not buying into the story that he's selling "Look Johnson, the journo. It's just come to attention that he's alive. He's in Damascus. All I'm asking is that you put the package together and send couple T1 teams. Snatch him, from the crazies, and bring him home. You can manage that, yes?"

Mandy watches him "This is bullshit Bernard! Who sent you? Why has his has just come about?" she sips from her glass of water

They both nod thanks as the food arrives. "Ahh! But you know as well as me, it's not just come about. Nah, he's actually been in pipeline for about a year now. But he was never special enough to warrant risking teams on the ground in Syria" He cuts and takes a mouthful of steak "but for some reason... this week...someone pushed some buttons, and he became important enough, so he jumped the queue"

He continues to eat as Mandy picks over her salad while she still watches him "Why? Bernard, why him and why now? If you've known about him for a year. Then why has he jumped the queue, now?"

"Oh c'mon Mandy you know how the Washington wheels turn. You scratch my back …I scratch your itch, wherever it is"

Hmmm! she shakes her head "so they knew he was there for a year, and didn't do anything but now he suddenly warrants a rescue? But you don't want me to ask questions?. A re you serious?"

"Look the question is do you have operators ready to go?"

"I could sort something, Yes I'm sure I need to. But I need to look over the intel a bit more"

"Yeah sure.. sure" he continues with his steak "just um...don't spend too long looking. This is being expedited, hard and could get taken out of our hands if you can't handle it quickly"

He looks up from his meal at her. While she sits biting her lip, she's annoyed "I understand!. What I don't understand is the sudden urgency?"

"Mandy all I was told is to make clear to you, that _speed_ is of the essence here" he drinks his drink "and of course, if you happen to bring the other hostages home " he pauses and looks at her "Then that would be good for everyone right. I mean we can all bask in the glory. he gives her a fake smile "You not eating?"

She nods. Smiling at the right times. But that still doesn't make sit right with her especially after seeing the video Reuben gave her

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Come" Blackburn shouts

Mandy opens the door to his office "can I speak with you?"

"Yeah sure Mandy. Come in. Sounds important... What is it?"

She sighs "I've had a target package pushed to the front of the queue by someone in Washington"

"That doesn't sound good" Blackburn frowns "should I be worried?"

"Hmmm! Maybe…. I'm not sure who pushing what buttons here, but I don't have a lot of choice" she frowns "just need to know what teams you have available ready to go ASAP"

"Well Charlie and Bravo are ready as soon as you are green Lit... how many you need?"

"Two... and it's already hot to go" she sighs "I was hoping perhaps keep Bravo out of this"

"Because ….you wonder if Jason's ready? Then, I can assure you he's fine and they're still my best team"

She gulps and thinks "It's not a question about Jason being ready. Look Eric, you better see this" she plugs the flash drive into his laptop and turns on the TV. He watches the video

"And …this doesn't warrant BRAVO because, what? Mandy I don't understand"

"Journalist Stephen Johnson. Been in Damascus for nearly three years. On the surface this is just standard hostage snatch and grab" she sighs again "Now watch again and look closely in the background at the other hostages this time."

He looks confused as the video replays, but he does as she says and carefully studies the footage "Oh! Oh my god is that Catherine Lewis?"

"You get it now? My brief includes bringing any other captives back" she gives him a worried sigh "You send BRAVO in there and you know Jason won't leave until he brings her out and I can't even be sure she's still there but I do get the impression that _someone_ somewhere thinks she is"

Blackburn rubs his head "Shit! So, we can we get any more intel, one way or the other? Be sure before we go in"

"No. No, we need to move on this now. This thing is being pushed... and being pushed hard. I think someone knows she's there, but I don't have any proof" She sighs as she see Blackburn thinking it over "Between us, I don't think this has been about bringing Johnson home!"

The door knocks "Come!"

Jason puts his head around the door and Mandy quickly turns the laptop off "Disturbing anything? "

"No, no we're done" Mandy smiles

"Good! Um... look Mandy I wondered if you wanted to catch a drink? I got something I want to discuss with you"

"Yeh sure" She smiles at Blackburn "Eric, I'll leave this with you"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They stand at the bar and Jason orders drinks. "How about we go sit over there in the booth. More private"

"Sure" she looks confused. Then as Jason returns with the drinks and sits down she frowns at him he looks worried "Everything alright?"

"Yeah just um...I found this, in CJs things" he holds the flash drive in his fingers.

"And?" she looks puzzled as she reads the label on it "Baby pics"

"That's what's on it"

"Okay?" she smiles "And what?"

He sighs biting his lip before he explains "There's also another file on there but it's password protected, it's asking for some key logger file. I can't open it"

"And you...you want me to get it open?" she looks puzzled "Well yeah sure. I can send it to the lab" she frowns

"Do you have someone you can trust? Like really trust to do it"

"What is this Jason?" she frowns "Some family snaps that she password protected. I don't think they're gonna be state secrets do you?" she laughs " I mean if she password protected it...you know, are you sure you really wanna know what those photos are?" She raises her eyebrows "I mean...they might be, you know personal"

He frowns and ignores her comments "It's called shopping list"

She shakes her head " I don't understand"

He lowers his voice "Look, when we were at the Fairfax hostage sitch, she told me..." he looks round "she told me she thought they came after her for a third part of those lists you have. A _big-name_ list. One that involved people high up things to do with arms contracts, under the radar weapons sales. I think that list might be on here"

She looks at him "Jason do you know what you're saying but why would she put it on there with baby pictures?"

"Maybe to hide it? Can you get it open off record or not?"

" Yeah maybe" she looks worried "but Jason, if anyone knows you have this, and it is what you think..." she bites her lip "we need to be careful. I mean, look what it's cost C.J, and her father already. Let me do some digging first"

"Yeah.." He sighs "..you're right. Maybe I need to hang on to it for a while" he puts his keys back in his pocket and takes a sip of his drink

"Maybe best not to mention this to anyone. Just until we establish exactly what it is." He continues with his drink as she changes the subject.  
"Jason how are you doing, really?" She puts her hand on his.

"I'm good" he nods he puts his other hand on the back of hers and softly rubs it. She smiles and looks in his eyes there's always nearly a moment between them but neither of them ever push further. Neither dare risk their friendship

"HEY!" Sonny shuffles in beside them "And so, what you two getting all cozy about here?"

"Nothing just talking" Mandy smiles

Ray and Davis also join them "Hey, how you doing?" Ray frowns watching them, wondering what's going on.

"Yeah I'm good "

"JC sleeping better now?"

"Yeah, yeah he's settling more now. Getting a better routine"

"That's good brother. routine that's the key"

"Look I have to go" Mandy looks at her watch. She smiles at the others "Jason, we ll talk again later" then as she leaves she makes a call.

It goes directly to voicemail "Reuben, it's Mandy Ellis, can you call me please when you get this message please. It's urgent"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"What was that all about?" Ray frowns

"Nothing, just a drink and a catch up. Hey what's going on with Blondie?" They all turnaround to check as Clay arrives with a woman

"Oh no!" he sighs "Look, do you wanna go somewhere else? Only, I didn't expect the guys to be here yet and they can be a bit...well a lot to take in on a first date"

"No!" She smiles "It's fine. I mean, I'm sure they'll be fine. I can handle it"

Okay then... Hey!" He awkwardly smiles at everyone "Um...so, this is um...this is Nancy, a friend of mine"

"Nancy!" Sonny smiles "Well hullo there, Nancy. Please sit" Sonny points to the seat next to him "Hey Ray, let's be polite and get Nancy a drink, shall we?"

As sonny gets up to let Nancy sit down he hushes his voice and frowns, looking at Ray "So, where the hell's she suddenly come from?"

"I have no idea?" Ray shrugs "So... Nancy, what would you like to drink?"

"Oh um…I'll have a vodka soda. Thanks"

"Coming right up!"

At the bar as Ray helps Spenser at the bar. "You serious with her man?" Ray frowns "Cos um...not being funny, she doesn't really seem your type"

"No, not long. This is kinda first date but she's fun. Different. A bit of a distraction" Spenser turns around and smiles at her watching her chatting with Sonny

"Okay well...distractions are good sometimes" Ray nods "Guess you moving on, which is also good. But look man, just be careful. Take it slow"

"So… Nancy. How you meet our poster boy then?"

"Um..." she looks up smiling as Clay returns to the table ".. he was shopping with his baby, and we just got chatting. I did something I never do and asked him to have a coffee" She laughs "But they just looked so cute and I just thought why the hell not" she shrugs

Everyone at the table stops what they're doing, turning to stare at a now blushing Clay "Oh um.. that was misunderstanding" Clay tries to brush off her comment about it being _his_ baby.

"Sorry I misunderstood, about what?" Nancy frowns at him, puzzled

"Oh um.. about the baby. I never actually said he was mine!"

"No, actually I asked you, is he yours, and you said yes? I remember it clearly"

"No!" Clay laughs to cover his embarrassed panic "No, no you said was he with me. I said yes... meaning yes he was with me" he stutters as everyone stares at him

"And..." Sonny lowers his voice and whispers to Ray, who's sitting next to him "..the elephant in the room, just rears its head!"

"You know what.." Jason stands up, staring at Clay. He's obviously not happy and the atmosphere feels tense "I need to get off, check on my kids. Nancy..." He smiles ".. it was nice to meet you. Perhaps we'll meet again"

Ray gets up and goes after him "Jason! Jace man, wait up! Everything okay with you?" he frowns "You know that thing with Clay, about the baby. I'm sure that was a misunderstanding like he said"

"Really? ... No, see Ray that wasn't a misunderstanding. That's what he's wondering" he sighs "Don't tell me, you all haven't thought it? Tell me you haven't wondered too?"

"And haven't you.." Ray sighs and roll his eyes "... honestly?"

Jason nods and sigh "You know Ray, yeah ... yeah I did. But only for an instant. You know, I've looked at him a few times and yeah it has crossed my mind. I have to admit that."

"Look man..." Ray shakes his head " if you got doubts and you're not sure, then…." He pauses "...then maybe you should do a test and know for sure"

"NO!" he shakes his head "No Ray, I don't need to. There was one thing between us always and that was that trusted each other. Hundred percent through everything we had each other's back" he looks at Ray "Yeah I know I was the one let her down. And she was pissed at me" he sighs "God knows she had plenty reasons not to tell me was my son. But when she put me as guardian, to look after him, that's when I knew. She wouldn't have done that Ray, She wouldn't. Not if he wasn't mine." he bites his lip "She did that knowing that if that kicked in then it was likely she was dead or not coming back. She did that for a reason"

Ray sighs "But You don't know you for sure." Ray sighs "You know how spiteful she can be and hell, when did she ever do anything sensible? Jace all I'm saying it maybe a test is the best thing"

"Ray, she wouldn't do it to Jaycee, she would have wanted him to know for sure. That's how I know he's mine!"

Ray sighs and nods "Okay, I get it brother, but still wouldn't you rather know for sure?"

"No, I don't need to know anything! What he believes..." Jason turns pointing at Clay " that's up to him. He needs to get over it and get on cos she not coming back now. He's my son, Ray, end of!

Ray let out a big long sigh. W _oah!_

"Soooo?" Sonny looks over his shoulder

Ray shrugs "No, no go on the test. He's sure he's his!"

"Shit!" Sonny rubs his head and sighs "So, now we just gotta hope Spenser accepts it, and don't do anything stupid"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Nancy and Clay nearly fall in the door kissing. She's giggling from all the drink the guys bought her. He's undressing her as he tries to shut the door behind them.

She drops her dress to the floor, and he smiles looking at her. She's only wearing a purple lace bra and matching panties as he lays her back on the bed _Hmmm_! He sighs at the sight of her laying there and he starts to undo his pants. Then he stops and sigh "You know, I'm sorry. I can't do this!"

"What?" she sits up frowning at him What do you mean you can't? Clay, of course, you can" she smiles and leans up pulling his head down to kiss him "You want this, hell I want this Clay what's wrong?"

"I want to but... sorry I just can't"

She lays him down on his back on the bed pulling his under pants down she wraps her mouth around him and while she performs on him, he's just going through the motions, closing his eyes. But even this, her doing this for him, he finds he can't enjoy it. Not the way he hoped he would. It's the first time since everything with C.J but he still can't clear his mind of her.

It's late and they lay in the dark. He's thinking, while he watches her sleep next to him. Kissing her shoulder, he wakes her up "Sorry"

"Hey" she smiles, sitting up and then kissing him "Clay don't be sorry" She reaches over, placing her lips against his and he responds "Oh!" she smiles "That's better!"

He moves his body over the top of her _Hmmm!_ She groans, running her fingers through his hair _"Oh god Clay"_ She gasps, taking a deep breath as he runs his hand over her body finally able to relax and have sex with her. Shut off his mind and lose himself in the moment, not thinking about anything else.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

 _Leave a messag_ e ** _BEEP!**_

"Please Reuben, it's Mandy, again! Will you call me. I have something might interest you" _Damn! Reuben, where the hell are you?_

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She sits at the bar waiting and orders another martini. She's been waiting over half an hour now. _This drink and I'm gone,_

Then she smiles as two hands run down over her shoulders and along her arms. "Mandy, my deepest apology" He kisses her neck "Keeping such a beautiful lady waiting, is not becoming of a gentleman"

"Oh, you're such charmer" she smiles

"Good job I am, by the look on your face" he smiles nodding to the barman "I'll have a brandy please. So, what's with all the messages?"

"Your table is ready Madam"

"We're eating?" he inquires

"I thought it was the least you could do, for keeping me waiting was to buy me dinner. And.." she smiles "I've heard it's very expensive here"

"Well of course" Reuben grins as he takes a sip from his brandy "Let's eat then we can talk"

They are shown to a table by the large window and Mandy stares out watching the glittering skyline below "So… I had an interesting visitor yesterday.. " she sips her wine "Bernard Francis came to see me. Do you know him?"

"I've heard the name. But.. nothing more than that" He sighs smiling at her, touching her hand on the table.

"Well he um.. he wants me to send a team of operators to bring home a journalist, who's being held in Damascus"

He shows no emotion drinking from his glass "Well, that's a good thing to do. Can you do it?"

She sits studying him as she thinks about what she's going to answer "You know, it seemed funny to me that they sat on this case for a whole year and now, suddenly, he becomes a priority, only a few days after _you_ give me a video showing him alive" she frowns "That's a major coincidence, don't you think?"

"And who..." Reuben laughs "said I gave you a video of this journalist?"

"That's the thing." She frowns watching him, trying to read his body language but his emotionless state makes this virtually impossible "I don't actually think you did. What's going on here? Why do you care who's brought back?" she frowns

"I don't care, who comes back but.." he takes a deep breath "...the people I work for, they do."

"Why? Who's behind this Reuben"

For the first time he frowns at her "Mandy please don't ask questions that you know very well I can't answer" his tone darkens then he takes another sip of his drink "So question is, are you bringing the journalist home?"

"No!" She purses her lips, frowning "Not yet. I need to vet the intel further, see exactly what we're getting into"

"Well..." He frowns with a look of annoyance " one thing I will say... is don't wait too long. I mean even you know how volatile that region is. They could move hostages at any time."

"Oh, I'm very much aware of that but I need to make sure they are where I'm told they are"

"I'm sure if you were to act quickly, then they will be." he smiles Oh um... while I remember. Did you say you had something for me?"

She grins while she looks at the menu and then shakes her head "No, actually I don't. Why are you _shopping_ for something in particular?"

"Oh, nothing in particular" He sits back in his chair, smiling as he stares at her "Are you ready to order?"

o-o-o-o

"That was delicious" Reuben pushes his plate back as he finishes "So... how about we order some champagne and go to my room. Pick up where Mexico left off" he takes hold of her hand across the table.

She bites her lip thinking and then she looks at him and smiles. As much as he plays games with her there is something about him, and his accent, that she just can't resist. She's not sure if it's his old fashion English charm or the dangerous edge to him "It had better be expensive champagne" she smiles, picking up her purse from the floor beside her.

"Oh...of course" he smiles, running his hand down her back "Never cheap champagne for you, Mandy"


	27. Chapter 27

**Chapter 27: Mandy's Mistake**

_**BLEEP! ** BLEEP! ** BLEEP! ** BLEEP! **_ __

Cell phones are being paged across the two teams. BRAVO and Charlie are both being spun up.

Clay wakes with Nancy still asleep beside him. _Oh Shit!_ He sighs as he looks at her. Wondering how he's now going to explain why he has to cut and run this early. As he lays there looking at her he wonders where this relationship is going. _Sure, she's fun but Ray's right, she's not really my type. Do I even want to be with her?_

He rubs the tiredness from his face and gets out of bed. Pulling his pants on first he starts to get dressed and as he does Nancy opens her eyes

"Hey"

"Hey!" he smiles "Sorry but I've been called to work. I um... I'll be away for a couple of days. Will you be okay to let yourself out? Then I'll call when I get back" He leans over and kisses her.

"Okay!" she frowns "Yeah sure. I guess work is work, right? But um... you know, I was wondering if maybe you have time to..." she coughs "..before you go?" She smiles, throwing the quilt back, teasing him with her naked body.

He checks his watch and smiles. "You know... maybe I do!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason wakes to his phone bleeping, loudly. __

_Jeez!_ He rubs his head, checking the time he realises he hasn't woken all night. He looks at JC he's still asleep in his crib. _God can't believe you slept through the night_ He smiles, rubbing head as he gets up. Pulling some clothes from the pile on the chair, he starts to gather his belongings but first he picks up his cell and makes a call

"Hey Ray, yeah it's Jason. It still okay to drop JC with Naima? Yeah great. I'll pick you up in fifteen minutes"

He stands quietly watching as JC sleeps still thinking about what Clay said yesterday. He sighs, rubbing his hand on his chin as he thinks about it. Then he picks the baby up, holding him and sniffing his hair. He closes his eyes, enjoying the feeling of having him close as he tries to shut all the other noises and words out of his head.

"Right.." he kisses him ".. let's get you dressed. Daddy has to go to work."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Mandy's readying her files at the briefing. She looks apprehensively at Blackburn. He frowns "You ready for this?"

"Honestly?" she frowns "No!"

"Yeah, I gotta say, it's not a briefing I'm looking forward to. I just don't know how Jason's gonna react. If this is going to push him to the edge again. "

"Yeah I'm just not sure how he'll take it. I mean, he was just getting on and putting all this stuff, with her, behind him. Eric what if we don't find her? How's he going to be, knowing for sure, that she's still out there somewhere"

"Hey...let's not go there just yet" He puts his hand on Mandy's shoulder, looking up at the door as the two teams start to fill the briefing room "Just take one step at a time"

The room is suddenly filled with the noise of chatter and laughter. The rivalry and insults are thrown back and forth. All the guys shouting and messing around as balls of paper get thrown at each other.

"Right!" Blackburn shouts, getting the attention of the whole room "Settle down. Let's have some quiet and get on with this. Focus, on the job in hand"

Mandy has the video paused on the large screen at the front of the room. She sighs, nervously coughing before she begins "Stephen Johnson." She points at the screen "Journalist. Thirty-four years old. He was captured in Syria three years ago. He was thought to be dead until this footage arrived a few days ago. It's been verified and he is alive. Seems he just got lucky and we need to bring him home."

She flicks through some photographs of him before he went out there and Blackburn takes over the bried "Heads up, we need to tread carefully on this. As the son of a political donor and PR manager for a state Senator, Washington are pushing this hard. They have their eyes on it,and you. Gentlemen, they want it done fast. We can't risk them getting tipped off and moving the hostages"

There's lots of eye rolling around the room and then Sonny speaks up "So when you break it down, what you're tellin' us is cos his Daddy's got money, it's bought him a first-class flight home with us."

"Technically, it's not being viewed in those terms though Sonny" Mandy frowns "But if I'm honest then yeah it's something like that" she sighs "This video was taken in Damascus, just a week ago. It's believed from our intel that he, and several other hostages, are still being held at this secure location."

"And this needs two teams?" Jason frowns "Looks a pretty standard hostage extraction to me, or there something you're not telling us?" Jason looks around at Beau who's nodding in agreement "But then still.. "he laughs "if Charlie team can't handle it alone who are we to say no to helping them out? I mean, I know we can handle it but what about you Beau, Charlie need back up?"

"Yeah see, I thought it was us backing your ass's up." Beau bites back. He smiles "Look, as much as I hate to admit it and believe me, Hayes you don't sat much I agree with but on this, he's right it does seem excessive to have two extraction teams for one hostage grab, even in Damascus"

"The reason we necessitate two teams is because speed is the objective here. We have two possible target locations and we need those hostages out as quickly as possible, before they disappear for good" Mandy ignores the frowning questions on their faces and continues "As I said Johnson is our prime objective, but it's also verified that there are other hostages there. The PR on further rescues would be good but we don't get to them quickly then they will go to ground and we will lose them"

"And there we have it .. _BOOM!"_ Jason laughs, swinging around in his chair " This s our chance to make the suits look good. For them to say, hat a wonderful job they did saving the world"

Beau smiles "So, the other hostages. How many we talking about?"

"It's unconfirmed"

"So, we don't know how many. But do we know who? I mean I'm just guessing there's more to this PR stunt than one journo, right? So, who else is out there that we need to be aware of?" he frowns at Mandy. His experience tells him that something doesn't sit right. Something about the vagueness of her pitch "I mean, I would say there is some other HVT that maybe you're covering, than just this guy. I got a feelin' he's just a cover for something"

Jason frowns, he's nodding agreeing. "Yeah Beau's right, there seems more to this, than what your tellin us here Mandy."

Mandy gets serious with them "I have not been given any specific HVTs that are known to be there, but bear in mind, there could be _anyone_ who's been snatched in the past few years. We really don't know. There is nothing specific to the intel we've been given. But remember, Damascus is a known exchange center, where hostages from all over the world are traded between varying groups."

She nervous now biting her lip as she watches the guys. She knows they're looking at her, and they're suspicious. Now its the time she's been dreading, the time to playback the video clip. She's trying to calm herself. "As you know hostages get trafficked through this city all of the time even ones from US and Mexico. We are specifically concerned with American hostages. You may have to assess and prioritize once you're on the ground"

Blackburn takes over "Remember also, _Johnson_ is priority. Anyone else is just extra brownie points. You're possibly gonna have some tough choices to make here gentlemen. Best you prepare yourselves for that."

As the images of Johnson being brutally beaten are played out on the screen, everyone in the room drops their gaze to the floor taking deep breaths

"Okay...okay just stop it there, I think we get the picture." Jason sighs getting them to pause the tape " I'm sure we don't need to watch the rest to get the idea why he needs to come home and I mean it's not like we haven't seen a similar thing, a hundred times before."

Blackburn looks up staring at Mandy as he hits pause on the tape. Davis staring at him, then her gaze goes around the room, then back to Mandy.

She bites her lip and awkwardly looks at the floor, wondering if Mandy is going to point out there rest of the information they saw on the tap. But as Davis stares at her, Mandy is trying to decide how, and if, she should say anything about CJ. The guys already suspicious but if she doesn't say anything then Jason may not worry so much about trying to find her. It's a tough call.

"I don't know, something here, it feels wrong. I mean, Mandy you seem hellishly on edge for a standard hostage snatch. There's gotta be more to this, than what you're sayin ? " Jason frowns "One team would've been enough for this op. It's not something we haven't all done before. But you're sending two teams." He looks at Beau who's still nodding in agreement "Someone here has gotta be wanted back enough to risk two teams"

Davis distracts the conversation "This map shows the location and layout of the two adjoining compounds. Johnson could be being held in either one. Hence, the need for two extraction teams. We need to make this quick " she nervously continues the agreed infill plans. But while she talks it's Sonny who notices how apprehensive she seems and as she finishes gathering her files on the desk he questions her

"Davis what's wrong? " She shakes her head, but Sonny knows her well enough now to know that there's something not right. Something more and he frowns at her as she tries to move on to the Exfil plan.

"So, got a rough idea how many other hostages we're potentially looking to exfil? I mean we gotta know some kinda numbers here, right? I mean the helo crewa are gonna have to know how many we can bring back" Beau frowns "So basically you're asking us to pick and choose hostages on the ground?"

"That sucks!" Sonny frowns "So we gotta leave you with a bunch of crazies, but not you. Oh yeah that's great. Great way to run an operation"

"So, what you got no intel, nothing to give us here Mandy?" Jason sighs frustrated "Nothing at all to help us make decisions?" Jason's watching Mandy he knows her, he can see how uncomfortable she looks, how on edge and nervous she is "Alright c'mon spill it, what the hell's going on here? My gut says you're holding something back. My gut is never wrong,"

"Jason you have all the information in front of you, that I've got to give. I'm hiding nothing!" she suddenly finds herself lying and she has to admit she doesn't like the feeling.

Jason shakes his head. "Well I for one am not buying it"

"Alright, let's take a break. Gentlemen..." Blackburn interrupts . "Let's get some coffee "

Davis stands beside Mandy "Are you not gonna tell them, before they find out? You know the way they're going. They will."

Mandy shakes her head "I don't know, Lisa. I'm so torn about the best option. I mean technically were going after Johnson. Let's see what happens first. I can always tell them on route"

Sonny grabs Davis as she walks past with her coffee " Hey so what's going on?"

"Nothing" she shakes her head. She feels awkward, she doesn't like to lie to Sonny

"Yes, there is. Both you and Miss Mandy are acting awfully shifty" he squints at her "I can read you Davis, what is it? What you hiding. You know, we don't want no nasty surprises out there"

"Sonny it's fine. I'm sure Mandy will explain everything"

"She'll explain? So what is there to explain." He's still suspicious of feeling that she's covering something

"Sonny I can't. Don't ask alright. Just wait and Mandy will tell you"

Clay leans back in his chair. He's taking the break as opportunity to check the intel footage on his laptop.

"Hey poster boy, you want a coffee?"

"Yeah…yeah sure" He frowns sitting up straight in the chair as something catches his eye with the images on the screen. He leans forward, slowing the tape, pausing and rewinding frame by frame. What the hell? He frowns now seriously concentrating. Then he sits back and laughs staring at the paused image "You were right Jace..." he shouts over the general noise

"Whats that?" Jason frowns turning around to face Clay

"Mandy, she didn't tell us everything. Did you?" He smiles staring at her hard in the face "You knew, didn't you. Where you ever gonna tell us?"

Everyone stops and looks around at Spenser as Mandy shifts awkwardly "Clay, I ... I thought it was for the best, I mean I'm not even sure ..if it is"

"What's going on?" Jason frowns as he stands behind Clay's shoulder "You got something?" Jason puts the coffee down in front of him

"Yeah. And she didn't tell us everything, about the other hostages for a reason." he looks up staring at her. Sonny looks at Davis. She looks down feeling guilty. Mandy sighs loudly, looking to Blackburn for support, she closes her eyes waiting for Jason's' reaction.

Clay pushes the laptop towards him, so he can see closer "What the fuck... " He squints at the screen, then looks up and stares at Mandy "You didn't think to tell us this? You didn't think I needed to know this?"

Clay shakes his heads "Hell, I can't believe you tried to cover this up! You effectively lied to us. What the hell is wrong with you?"

Jason glares at her "I knew you were covering something! Oh my god I don't believe you!" he stands staring at the screen " _YOU_ knew that? You knew _she_ was there, and you didn't think to say anything, even to me? I thought we were friends. What, you didn't think that was important enough to warrant a mention." he turns on her "WHAT the actual fuck Mandy!" Jason's rubbing his head in disbelief. "I never thought you'd do something like this to me!" with that unable to curb his temper and afraid of what he might say he walks out of the briefing room slamming the door behind him.

As Ray checks the screen he also shakes his head "Man was that stupid!" he sigh and heads to the door "I'll go...I'll speak to him"

"Senior Chief Perry" Blackburn's not happy about Jason leaving the briefing "Tell Master Chief Hayes his presence is required back here, ASAP, that's an order!"

Mandy closes her eyes "Sorry I know I should have said but I just wasn't sure how he would react"

Beau shakes his head "Well _not_ telling him, that seems like it definitely a mistake! A big mistake" he's angry too "What the hell were you thinking keeping that back? You could have put us all at risk if he'd found out you held that back, once we were on the ground "

The teams all look at her with similar disapproving looks. "We're supposed to trust you. Trust you to give us all the intel. So, we can make informed decisions when we get out there. Now you've just broken that trust. You can see why Jason's pissed right?"

Ray's outside speaking to Jason. Getting him to calm down and come back to the briefing. He convinces him the only way they might get her back is for him to return and them get this mission underway.

He reluctantly agrees and comes back, still unhappy. Blackburn addresses the whole briefing room "Okay well now we're all clear on the situation. Can we remember our main HVT for this op is Johnson? _He_ is the priority. _He_ is the objective of this mission... Have we got that _CLEAR?_ " He looks at Jason "Master Chief are we _CLEAR_ on our objectives?"

Jason's still not happy and he frowns as he replies, "Oh I'm perfectly clear on mine!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"HAVOC this is BRAVO one we have the building in sight Copy"

"Copy BRAVO One"

"CHARLIE one this is HAVOC, confirm sitrep. Copy"

"HAVOC, CHARLIE one, we're in place. Copy"

"CHARLIE One this BRAVO One. On three... three..., two, one... execute! execute! execute!"

They hit both buildings simultaneously with smoke grenades. Then go in under a hail of rapid gun fire surrounding them but finally the teams have their compounds secure

Brock send in the dog!"

Cerberus goes searching room to room, until barking at a lock door at the back of the compound he waits for the guys. Johnson has located her and though chained the floor they soon have him freed.

Medically he's not in a good way as Trent doing what he can for now under the hostile circumstances by treating the outer, bleeding, lacerations to his face and arms

Jason has Ray and Spenser on over watch as he keeps an eye on the time. Conscious that they don't have long until they have to be at their exfil point He sighs. Now they have Johnson he's planning his next move. Does he move the team to safety, or does he continues searching for more hostages? Does he continue searching for CJ.

They can hear the sound of Charlie team hitting the building next door. They've already rounded up six more of the hostages. Though now they're under siege from an ever-growing number of hostiles and Charlie one, Beau, makes his team move. Taking them to the safety of exfill.

"BRAVO one this is CHARLIE one copy"

"Copy CHARLIE one. Go ahead"

"We were taking heat. We're moving to exfil copy"

"Copy that CHARLIE one. BRAVO ETA ten mics to exfil. We got the HVT. I'm gonna give it five see if we can locate any more hostages"

Copy that Charlie one out!"

"Hey, you" He shouts at Johnson "You know where they're keeping the other hostages?" Stephen is in a bad way and he's scared and confused, not only by all the gunfire but by Jason's aggressive shouting.

"Jason…" Ray steps in backing him down "…he doesn't know. They've been keeping him here I doubt he's seen anyone else. " He looks at his watch "Jace we need to go!"

"Then we search the building again"

"Jason we need to make exfil" Ray reminds him for a third time "Jason! We have t _he target_ We _need_ to make exfil" he sighs but Jason just won't listen "Jace, I know what you're hoping for, but you have to accept, she's not here. And we need to exfil, right now!"

The gun fire is coming into the building they can see men moving around the compound if they don't get out soon then they may not at al. The situation is taking a turn or the worse when Clay takes a nick to the arm from incoming bullet.

"Okay we need to get out we taking heat out here" Ray frown, pulling at Jason's sleeve while Trent tries to patch up Clay as best he can.

But still Jason won't leave, reluctantly holding out "Not yet!" he looks again at his watch "There's still time We keep searching" he looks at Ray. "BRAVO three, how we holding do you copy? "

"Hey Jace" Sonny frowns as the message comes into his earpiece "You know things are heating up now. We need to move ASAP"

"HAVOC this is BRAVO One we need to push exfil back ten mics Copy "

Ray shakes his head "Jace, what the hell. This is getting dangerous now. We've searched there is no one else here." Ray's starting to worry "We need to get the hell out now!"

"She has to be here. You saw that tape!"

"Yeah, but we've searched the whole compound. They must have brought them here. Then moved them again. Look this room, they use it for making those tapes" He points to the recording equipment and laptop in the corner of the room "Maybe that's all they brought them here for? But whatever, Jace .. shes' gone. C'mon man we need to go"

Jason starts to tear down the screen and camera equipment, throwing stuff around the room in frustration "Where is she Ray?"

"I don't know but Jace" Ray sighs, he wishes he did "Jason, c'mon!"

Jason shakes his head, glaring at Ray "Five more minutes"

Ray shakes his head "Jason, we don't have five more minutes, if you don't get on that helo you gonna get us all killed, and I know you don't want that. CJ wouldn't want that either "

"How the hell would you know what she'd want? I know she sure as hell wouldn't wanna be left here! Not like this." Jason's' angry torn between trying to rescue the woman he loves and saving his team but ultimately he knows Ray's right.

 _Damn!_ _Urggghh!_ He screams rubbing his head in frustration "I can't just leave when she might be this close!"

"C'mon brother, give the exfil order!. You know none of us will go until you do!" he shakes his head "Jason man, you want us to stay we'll stay but… you have to make the call." He takes hold of Jason looking him in the eyes "C'mon on just do it you know it's the right thing. You did your best. It's time to let it go, before you get anyone else killed."

Jason knows this is the last chance for all of them and he regretfully makes the decision and closing his eyes, he lets out a long sigh "This is BRAVO One..."he pauses as his about to give the order his heart sinks."... all BRAVO call signs, exfil! I say again exfil"

Ray nods "C'mon" He puts his hand on Jason's back, grabbing the straps of his vest, he pulls him along behind him .

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They're back on board the helo. All sitting in reflective silence as the mission they just accomplished. In terms of the objective they completed it with success, Johnson's release having been secured. But in their hearts they all know that's not what Jason came for, and so they're all disappointed it didn't have the outcome they hoped for .

Jason sighs, banging his head back against the helo wall, trying to contain his emotions Rubbing his forehead with his fist in frustration and then he closes his eyes, shutting it all out as his eyes fill with tears and he hopes no one else can see.

But even though no one says it as they sit quiet they can all see how hurt, how upset how broken he looks.

Ray closes his eyes, so he doesn't have to witness the pain. Clay looks at the floor. He rubs his chin, rubbing his arm, sore from the bullet graze but it doesn't hurt half as much as they feeling of pain he has in his heart about not having found CJ. And though he aches for her to the hurt he can see Jason suffering, hurts him more _Why couldn't we have just found her?_ _He sighs to himself as he too closes his eyes._

Seeing the lonely tears roll down Jason's face and the look of desolation Ray feel that he should say something to comfort him "You did everything you could man. Jace, we don't even know that she was there. We couldn't have done anymore"

Jason puts his head back and closes out the noise. He doesn't even want to hear Ray's good intention-ed words all he cares is that they didn't find her. That he feels like they abandoned her. His thoughts are then interrupted by the helo pilot "BRAVO one this is LIMA one"

"Go head LIMA one" Jason switches back on to BRAVO leader mode. All other thoughts are side-lined

"Jump to channel three. CHARLIE ONE wants to talk. Copy"

Channel three on the radio puts him and Beau into a private conversation "BRAVO One this is CHARLIE ONE do you copy?"

"Copy Beau go ahead."

"Jason… look man I didn't realise until things calmed down when we boarded the bird for exfil and got to check. But… and I've been told not to tell anyone, including you but as a friend I thought you should know. "he pauses and turning his back on his team and hushing his voice in the hope that no one else hear him. He whispers "Jason...CHARLIE team picked her up"

There's a long silence and Beau waits for a reply but there's nothing "Jason did you copy? Look man, she's bit banged up, but she's gonna be she was okay. Look, I can't tell you anymore as they've stuck a classified order on this whole op but well ...well I just thought you... you'd wanna know"

Jason's still silent, thinking for a few moments and also because he doesn't know how to react. His heart beating fast, his breath deep hes just so relieved.

"Jason are you there?" Beau frowns wondering if he's just been talking to fresh air, "Jason did you copy that?"

"Yeah" Jason sighs as he finally responds "Yeah copy that CHARLIE One. Thanks. Beau… I appreciate it. This is one out "

"Beau?" Ray looks at Jason concerned "Everything okay? Something wrong with Charlie teams"

Jason looks up and smiles at him "Charlie team picked her up" Jason lets out a massive sigh he can't actually believe what he's saying " Oh my god they picked her up! She's alive Ray!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Charlie team touch down first. Bravo are fourteen minutes behind them. Jason jumps out of the helo side door even before it fully touches down,. He then runs as fast as he can to were e Charlie team are unloading

"Where is she?"

"Jason stop!" Beau grabs hold of him as Jason starts searching the back of the helo "Jason the suits took her. Said something about a de brief"

"What where? "

Beau shrugs "ten, fifteen minutes ago. They were waiting when we landed. Loaded her in a car and took her. Like I said earlier they slapped a classified order on us"

"But we've still got Johnson with us. What about him? Why didn't they wait and pick him up?"

"I don't know "Beau shrugs confused "They didn't take out other hostages either. They loaded them onto a separate vehicle. Just took CJ and left"

"What the hell?" Jason frowns then he turns and without thinking he starts running across the tarmac back to the base.

 **o-o—o—o—o-o-o**

Jason rushes down the corridor a banging hard on the closed door "Where is she?"

he bursts into the control room without waiting "Jason!" Blackburn puts his hand on his chest stopping him "...you can't see her."

"What? What do you mean I can't see her? I wanna see her now!"

"You just can't, okay!. They won't let anyone see her. She's not here anyway. They're holdin gher down the corridor. They're waiting for transportation out"

"Out?! What do you mean out? Out were? Where the hell are they taking her? " he frowns pushing against Blackburn hand as he blocks the doorway "Get out of my way"

"JASON, I told you, you can't! Do you understand, you can't see her?"

"This is crazy did you tell them she has a son. A little boy waiting at home he needs his mother. For god sake… we just found her after all this time and what now I can't see her? I'm gonna fix this. I need to see her!"

He leaves the way he came striding angrily down the corridor till he gets to Mandy's office "I need to see her. You need to fix this I need to see her right now!"

"What?" Mandy's confused she's been in her office she's had no word about anything

"Your lot, they took her. Where is she?"

"Jason, I don't understand we haven't had access to anyone yet we waiting for you to bring Johnson back, I have a de brief set up down the corridor. I was just clearing something from my desk so I could deal with this. What the hell are you going on a bout "

"yeah we brought Johnson back, the others came with Charlie team. I wanna know where CJ is Blackburn says no one can see her? So, what's going on?"

"I don't know! Just calm down. I'll try and find out. I don't know any more than you "

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason's pacing the corridor. Mandy seems to have been gone a lifetime. He hasn't even showered or changed yet stil in his combats, dirty from the mission

"Finally!" he frowns as she returns. "Well?!

"You're not going to like this but …" She's frowning and biting her lip "look it's the best I could do but I've managed to pull some strings and get you five minutes with her. But that's it after that I don't know That's all they'll let me have"

"Five minutes What the hell ,Why? Mandy what's going on why are they holding her? She was a hostage. I don't get this. They're not gonna let her see her son?"

"Jason, it's complicated. Look I have to go and do the de brief .. she's in an office the other side of building C block room three twenty. I have to de brief the other hostages"

"Wait!" He shakes his head "You need to de brief the other hostages? What then? Then they can go? Why is she not with them?" he's pacing back and forward confused and frustrated on "Is she okay? She's not hurt is she"

"From what I saw, she's not in a good way. Physically she doesn't seem too bad but.. she's a mess. Jason this, it's complicated even I don't understand whats going on"

He frowns at her angrily "You don't know whats going on? You said she's not good. But they won't let her go? They got her a doctor?"

"I'm sure they will. Look..." she looks around and whispers "..between you and me, and I really shouldn't be telling you this!" so pauses "They're saying she's under arrest!"

"What? What the hell are you talking about... Arrested? Arrested for what? "

"I don't know ! I don't understand it…. It's total bullshit! But that's the story they're telling me" She puts her hand on his arm to comfort him "Look Jason, I don't know who's pulling the strings here, but these are not people I've seen before. I don't know which agency they belong to. But I'm on it, alright? Don't worry, I'm calling in favors to find out what's going on!"

"Arrested? What the fuck…I don't understand Who are these people? "

"The guy I spoke with, off the record said he was told about classified information. That's as much as I can get at the moment. Jason I know its bullshit, but we have to go with it, for now"

"Five minutes you said...You said I got five minutes? Okay "he nods his head, then dropping his helmet and taking his Vest and stuff off. Hr drops it all on the floor" Okay I'll take it"

"Jason don't do anything stupid. Cos, I'm gonna sort this. I promise!"

o-o-o—o-o

He takes at deep breath and enters the small side room; he's faced almost immediately by the small hunched figure "CJ? " he frowns watching her sitting on the bench her head in her hands.

"Oh my god, Jason!" she attempts to stand up, but he can see shes fragile on her legs, her arms covered in bruising as are her cheeks She immediately bursts into tears grabbing at him she collapses into his arms

"I got you " he holds her wrapping his arms around her tight holding her "what the hell happened

She's shaking her face wet as she sobs confused and tired. He kisses the top of her head gently lifting her chin he looks her in the eyes

"It's gonna be okay, I'm gonna sort this. Mandy's gonna get you out of here"

He places his lips against hero's and then he kisses her. A long slow kiss, her grabbing hold of his jacket pulling him holding him against . "Jason, please you have to me. don't let them take me. "

As he's about to speak the door opens and two burly men in suits come into the room "Ms Lewis it's time to go"

"No! No, this is bullshit!" Jason's wraps his arms around her not letting go

"Mr Hayes please let go, she needs to come with us. It's for her own protection"

"I'll sort this.. I promise" he kisses her again while she clings, desperately, to his clothing. Gripping the front of his jacket as they pull her away

"I'm sorry Ms Lewis we really have to go now"

"Jason!.." she cries as they lead her down the corridor. She looks back at him as they pull her away to a car outside,

She pulls herself to a stop " _ **Jason!"**_ she shouts "The baby pictures, did you get them?"

He looks puzzled but nods looking at her "yeah!"

"Keep them safe! Promise me that you'll keep them safe. I'll need them!" she stares hard at him

"C.J don't worry...I'll sort this!" He watches as they drag her away

"Jason brother what's going on?" Ray frowns as he enters the corridor

 _SHIT!_ Jason rubs his hand on his head "I don't know, Ray"

Mandy also stands in the corridor and Jason turns on her "You need to sort this!" he snaps "Whoever they are... whoever's pulling strings here, You need to get her back!"

"Jason... I have no idea what's going on, I swear!" And as he walks back down the corridor with Ray, she picks up her phone

"Reuben call me. It's urgent! I need your help."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o


	28. Chapter 28

**Chapter 29: Somethings not right**

Jason collapses onto the couch holding JC, who's asleep on his chest. While flicking through the numerous news channels, he lays with his head back against the arm of the couch and puts his feet up the other end. Relaxing he gives a loud and long, tired sigh.

The only good thing he knows about today is that CJ is still alive, even if he doesn't know what happened to her or when he's going to see her again

 _Shit!_ "What the hell is going on?" he looks up frowning as he watches the news about their mission, currently on screen.

The news Channel ticker tape flashes past:

 **~~~~~JOURNALIST STEPHEN JOHNSON -RESCUED~~~~~~**

 _A daring night-time raid by special forces secures the journalist and five other captives release .  
Details coming into this channel are sketchy, but it's believed Johnson may have been detained there for up to three years_

The channel runs released pictures of Johnson meeting his family and as Jason changes the station it's obvious the story is all over the main media channels.

The names and pictures of the other five other hostages are broadcast but there is no mention of CJ

Jason sighs, shaking his head "More lies" and he decides he's had enough, turning the TV off he lays back and closes his eyes 

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Mandy wakes in the hotel room. The news channel is silently on in the corner of the room and she looks up as she notices Reuben at the door, signing for the breakfast tray

She smiles, which he reciprocates as he comes back to the bed. Leaning across he kisses her but unlike he hoped, she doesn't respond "Is there something wrong?"

She sighs "I don't know what's going on here, Reuben?"

"I'm sorry" he frowns "I don't understand. Do you need me to go over it again" he smiles as he strokes her arm and moves his hand under the sheet, running his fingers along her leg and up the inside of her thigh?

She pushes his hand away and gets out of the bed. Picking up her dressing gown, she wraps it around her naked body "Not that! You know what I'm talking about" she sighs. Pausing a moment, thinking about what she wants to say, "I need you to get her back!"

Reuben lays himself back on the bed watching the news channel, his dressing gown falls open exposing his nakedness to her but he doesn't respond to her question.  
"What's going on here Mandy?" by his tone it obvious he's annoyed " I am I supposed to have an idea what you're talking about?"

"Oh, c'mon Reuben.." she turns staring at him " that's the problem, I think you do. I think you know _exactly_ what I'm talking about and that scares me" she shakes her head. "Reuben I'll ask you outright, do you know where Catherine Lewis is?" She pauses, waiting for him to respond "Did you set me up to bring her back? Because my feeling is that this was never anything to do with Johnson. I mean I don't think anyone really gave a shit if he came back "

"Well .." Reuben laughs smugly "that's harsh Mandy. I'm sure his family did"

She's silent, staring at him as she tries to work out what's going on in his head "Was he just a cover story?" she frowns "That's why you wanted me? You wanted me to send BRAVO because you knew that Jason would never stop until he brought her back, not if he knew she was there" she sighs, shaking her head "You played me!"

She suspected it but right now, watching him lying there, his face confirms it. "I can't believe you did this. Why didn't you just tell me? Why did you have to play games? I just don't get it."

He can see just how annoyed she is with him "Alright so...let's just say that I did know, where this...this, for now unnamed, person was. What makes you think I could influence anyone to secure their release?"

"Because you, or whoever you work for, you want something she's got. And what you don't want is that _thing_ going public" She stares at him suspiciously "Whatever she has it's important, and it scares you. That's why she's not dead, isn't it?" 

"And what, you're telling me you can give me this _something_ in exchange for their release"

"No!" she says bluntly "No, I don't have it but…maybe I know where it is. Maybe I could influence getting it back, once she's released"

"And you'd do that… for me?" He smiles trying to work his English charm on her, running his hand to the top of her thigh under her dressing gown

"No! No, I'd be doing it for a friend to get her released" She smiles watching him

He's annoyed at that comment, taking his hand away from her body he sits back in the bed. y "Hayes!" He sniffs loudly "You're doing this for him. Well then what do I get in return?"

"I don't know" she shrugs "Nothing, maybe? But you would be helping a good friend also" she smiles, leaning forward she kisses him then she lays back on the bed, turning onto her side allowing her dressing gown to fall open she faces him.

"Mandy Ellis" he smiles, his hand touching at her naked skin "You know, you are such a distraction" he runs his hand along the curve of her waist stroking along her hip.

She puts her hand on his chest to hold him back, but he leans in to kiss her "So you'll do it?" she smiles 

"Hmm…. I'll think about it!" he kisses her again "Now, if that's business concluded, then…where were we?"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

 ** 3 days later **

"Oh, there you are. You know, Blackburn's looking for you. He wants you in his office" Ray frowns watching as Jason just sits there not responding to him "Jace, you okay brother? You done something? Brother, are you in trouble?"

Jason sits on the stool in his cage, he's thinking as he still ignores Ray "Blackburn can wait!"

"Well he made it sound like it was very important. Maybe you should just go see what he wants?" Ray looks at him again "Jace I'm worried about you man, what's going on?"

Jason stands up, stretching his arms up towards the ceiling, then picking up his clean shirt he puts it on "Yeah I'm fine, just really tired. J.C had me up, some of last night"

"How's he doin'?"

"He's good. Though, he'd be better with is his Mom back" he leans against the side of the cage with his hands resting on his head. Silently thinking.

The door to the room opens and Blackburn sticks his head in the opening "Jason my office now! It's important" he nods, acknowledging Ray "Jason I said _NOW!_ "

Jason hesitates. He's reluctant and rolls his eyes giving a big sigh

" That's an order Master Chief. I've got something to show you"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They walk, rapidly, down the corridor towards Blackburn's office and then opening the door Jason can see Mandy standing there waiting.

"Oh, great just what I need" Jason sighs "I hope you've got news for me?"

"Yeah I do!" She smiles at him as she moves to the side, and behind her she reveals, hidden from view, CJ sitting in the chair behind her

"Hey !" she smiles at him

"Oh my god!" he gasps breathlessly, his face breaking out in a huge beaming smile "What the... are you okay? What the hell happened?" He squats down in front of her and she runs her hand through his hair. Smiling, a very tired looking, smile. She's exhausted and it's about the most she can manage, right now.

He puts his hand on her face, gently stroking one of the large bruises she has. While she continues to smile, nuzzling her face against the soft touch of his hand. Enjoying the comfort, he brings to her, a relieved, tear rolls down her cheek.

Then still smiling, he pulls her body towards him and kisses her passionately. She sighs, smiling at how good it feels. She doesn't want it to stop, wrapping her hand around his neck, it's like they've forgotten they have an audience in the room and Blackburn awkwardly coughs to remind them.

He turns, looking at Mandy he frowns "What's going on here?"

She just shrugs. "I don't know what happened. All I know is I got sent a location to pick her up from"

"And she's free to leave?"

"Yeah.. yeah she's free to go" She smiles, seeing Jason happy like this it's nice although inside she's torn as she has no idea what strings Reuben pulled to get her released or what the price will be.

C.J rests her forehead against Jason's and closes her eyes. They both give a long sigh of relief. Jason smiles wiping the tear from her face "C'mon, let's get you home"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

He unlocks the front door and ushers her through to the living room. It's all quiet with everyone out and J.C still with Naima

"You get settled and I'll go pick J.C up. I bet you can't wait to see him!" Jason smiles

"Jason! Don't go, not yet, there's no hurry. Can we just enjoy a bit of peace and quiet first?" she kisses him

 _Hmmm!_ He starts kissing her back "Yea…yeah sure, whatever you want. I just thought you'd be keen to see him. "

She kisses him more, watching his eyes. Wrapping her hands around his head, her tongue deep in his mouth. Wanting him.

He walks her backwards, dropping her down on the couch. She smiles as she falls into the soft cushion seats.

He doesn't stop kissing her, un-tucking her shirt, running his hands on the smooth skin of her waist as she pulls him towards her. She sighs "Oh god...Jason! You I never thought I'd see you again" she gulps

 _Shhh!_ he quietens her "Its fine, don't worry. Everything's fine… you're safe now"

They keep kissing, him wanting her so much right now and he's undoing his belt, while she's pulling at her pants trying to get them off.

Looking in his eyes, watching him before they start kissing again. She breaths deep breaths as he keeps kissing her. Releasing all the pent-up emotions he's been feeling.

" _Oh god!_ She groans "Jason I need you!" she sighs, laying her head back over the arm of the couch as he pushes her shirt up over her head taking it off. His mouth finding, he bud of nipple on her chest and sucking against it. His fingers finding the warm, wet between her legs and feeling her wanting desire how ready she is he pulls of his pants and shorts then laying his body over hers where she lies naked on the couch he pushes his hard want inside her

 _Oh Jeezz!_ She moans out loud as he forces himself deep inside her "Don't stop! Ohh… oh god I want you so much!"

Kissing frantically, their tongues forced deep in each other's mouth, tasting and probing as every part of them pushes wanting and needy together the she can feel as his fingers find her clit and he rubs and thrusts at the same time she's just about ready to peak. Letting out one last groaning sigh " _Ohhhh god!... Ohhh yes!_

She can feel as her orgasm as it reaches its peak, the wet warmth as he cums inside her, the exact moment she releases too. _Ohhhh! Yes...yes!… Jason, ohhhh yes!_ She breaths deep, smiling, and laughing, as their bodies collapse against each other. One heated, sweaty mess of flesh entwined on the couch.

He nuzzles into her neck, kissing. Her running her hands through his hair. Both taking deep breaths trying to relax

Aahhhhh! He sighs. "I missed you so much" he wraps himself round her, kissing her not letting her go.

She smiles, happy, content she closes her eyes "I'm so tired!"

She's been awake for hours and hours and it's not long, lying there naked underneath his warm comforting hold that it all catches up with her and she drifts off to sleep.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

She wakes, finding herself still on the couch still naked but a blanked over her covering her body.

There's a noise. A baby, making sounds. Its JC he's sat on the rug playing with toys.

For just a moment she looks around confused, getting her bearing she wonders where she is. "Hey!" she smiles seeing Jason sitting in the chair "How long have I been asleep?"

"A good while. Doesn't matter, you needed it. I got Naima to bring him, so I didn't have to leave you"

She smiles, running her hands through her matted hair watching as Jason picks JC up from the mat on the floor "You want some coffee?"

"Yeah sure"

"Here you hold him them. I' ll make some."

"You know what leave him there. I don't smell so good, I'm gonna grab a shower first, if that's okay?"

"Yeah sure that's fine" he nods "You feel okay, you need a doctor?" he leans down and kisses her. He can't believe how relieved he is to have her back.

"I'm good, just need a shower and some…" she smiles " some clothes"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason's on the rug, he and JC playing with the toy bricks, when she comes out of the shower, wrapped only in a towel.

"Hey!" She smiles watching them

"Hey. You feel better now? You've been a while. You still look tired"

She nods "Yeah it's gonna take a while, haven't slept properly in a while. Do I still have any clothes here?"

"Yeah um… there's a case, they brought back from your hotel at some point" He pauses "after the um….funeral. It's in the bottom of the closet"

"The funeral!" she frowns "Wow! That feels like a lifetime ago. I'll go find it" she smiles

"CJ there's something … something I need to ask you."

"Jason... can we do questions later? I'm tired. I just need to get my head straight before any more questions" she sighs, rubbing her head "All I feel like I've done for days, is answer, or not answer, questions"

"Yeh sure! Look, it doesn't matter, wasn't that important anyway. We're just glad to have you back" He looks at JC, stroking his hair, he sighs as he lovingly kisses the top of his head.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She's been a while and Jason comes into the bedroom to check on her, only to find she's fallen asleep on the bed.

He smiles, tucking J.C into his crib for his nap. Their presence in the room wakes her "Oh sorry. How you doing?"

"Yeah good" she yawns

"Emma's back, I'm just gonna check on her" he looks in the crib "He's having a nap now, part of his routine"

She nods, smiling at how attentive Jason is with him. Then she checks the time on her phone. "Hey Jason, how about we go out for bit? Get something to eat." she smiles "Change of scene would be good."

"You feel up to that?" he frowns "I thought you'd just wanna stay here, have some time with him?"

"Yeah I do but would just be good to go out. Have a bit of _normal_ after everything that's gone on. A distraction, rather the quiet"

"Okay sure, if that's what you want." he kisses her head " I'll check on Emma & Mikey. I'm sure she's in her room, see if she'll listen out for him"

"I'll get dressed"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

CJs dressed and ready to go and Jason smiles looking at her. He again gently touches the bruise on her cheek "Anything you wanna talk about? About what happened to you?"

"No! No …" she frowns "not right now. Soon, maybe!"

"Okay, so where you wanna go?"

"Umm…" She shrugs " the bar's fine by me. If it's okay with you?"

"You sure you wanna go there?" he frowns "I didn't know if you wanted to go somewhere away from everyone."

"No!" She sighs "No, gotta face everyone at some point. May as well be now Get it over and done with" she smiles, kissing him gently "Hey don't look so worried. I'm fine."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They enter the bar and as he expected, all the guys are there drinking. The turnaround to look at them.

"Uh oh…"Sonny sighs, hushing his voice he laughs to Davis ".. incoming missile"

"Sonny.. _Shhh!"_ _Davis nudges him with her elbow "_ and play nice!"

"Hey" Jason pulls out a chair and gestures CJ to sit down. There's a bit of an awkward atmosphere. They all just nod their informal hellos as no one knows what to say.

"Oh um… this is um…" Clay nervously introduces his new friend ".. this is Nancy"

"Hi Nancy" CJ smiles "I don't think we've met before"

As she looks around at the guys, C.J's having doubts. Her head feels anxious. She feels vague and out of sorts wondering if this was a good idea or if perhaps it was all too much and it wasn't a good idea to come here.

"So, I'll get some beers in." he turns looking at her "You want a soda?"

"Um…" she frowns awkwardly "I was gonna say I'll have a beer?!"

"You think you should?"

"Jason .. " she laughs "I'm um… sure one beer, after everything, is not too much to ask?"

"Yeah um… okay then" He smiles, reluctantly agreeing. 

o-o-o-o

CJ and Nancy are chatting. They're getting along quite well, considering they're poles apart personality wise. Then they laugh as they challenge the boys to play some pool. It's a much welcome relief, breaking some of the tense atmosphere that strangely hangs in the air.

Nancy's actually quite good at pool and her and CJ have a good laugh, they beat the boys, again, much to Sonny and Clay's annoyance. "Drinks on you, Sonny" CJ smiles handing him her glass.

 _Hmm!_ He sighs as he heads to the bar again.

"I'll give you a hand " Ray gets up going with him. He smiles, standing next to Jason, who's sitting on a stool at the bar "So how's it going, you two okays? Guess it seems strange her being back after all this time"

"Yeah it's good! Just gotta take it slow Ray. I still have no idea what went on. Even where she was. She hasn't wanted to talk about it yet. She's slept mostly"

"Yeah I guess. Can't have been good whatever it was. But you okay? Did you um… manage to ask about… you know about JC?"

"Leave it Ray, we're not talking about this right now!"

"C'mon man, it's important. You need to ask her. Clear up it up before you get in too deep"

"Look Ray, I'll do it in my own time. We only just got her back. It's all been a lot for her to cope with. I don't wanna push her, make the same mistakes of the past" He looks across at her "I need to be there for her now and like I already told ya, I know the answer"

"What you really mean is you don't wanna know the truth. That what it is, right? In case she tells you what you don't wanna hear. C'mon man..." Ray shakes his head " you know what alright, then just leave it "

Ray sighs, sipping from his beer "Bet she's glad to see him, JC, right? You know I can't imagine being kept away from my kids, not knowing if you might not see them again"

"Yeah …yeah she's okay. Like I said its early days. She's tired. Not thinking clearly yet." Jason pauses

"Hey man... something wrong?"

"You think I should get her to see a doctor? I mean it's just that um.. she's just …"Jason sighs stopping while he drinks the beer

"She's just what?" Ray frowns

"I dunno know. Just different I guess. I suppose she just needs a bit of time, to readjust to things. I mean who knows what happened."

"I guess like you say, we don't know what happen out there. I mean it's not gonna have been good right. A woman out there. Not gonna have been pleasant. Give her some time. Like you say maybe a doctor, worth getting her checked over. "

o-o-o-o-o-o

CJ's in the ladies' room, washing her hands, as Nancy opens the door "Just watch my purse for me please" Nancy smiles at her

CJ looks at the pink shiny purse and she smiles to herself _Like who would want a purse like that?_ She smiles _I can't even imagine having a purse, let alone one like that!_

Next to the purse is Nancy's drink, the double vodka soda she's been drinking all night. CJ picks up the glass and takes a long sniff of the contents. As she does Nancy comes out of the stall, and she watches her "You want it?" she frowns

"Oh what? Um.. sorry I just wondered which was which, they look the same" she picks up her soda, Jason insisted she move to from the beer, and smiles

"I see earlier you only had one beer I tell ya something, if I'd been through what you have, Id' be getting drunk tonight. Celebrate my freedom." She laughs "Sorry didn't mean to… I shouldn't have said that" she smiles "Hey, go on, drink it! I won't tell anyone"

CJ smiles and thinks about it, she licks her lips thinking. Then she smiles at Nancy "Oh what the hell!" she chugs the whole contents back in one. Closing her eyes, she savours the taste on her tongue. Mmmm she sighs.

" That feel better?" Nancy smiles

"Yeah! Yeah, that's…getting there" As odd as it seems, and they're definitely nothing alike, she likes Nancy. "C'mon, let's go beat their ass's at pool again. Hey Nancy, don't forget your purse!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Nancy gets another drink at the bar "Make that a _double_ vodka soda, oh and um… just a soda on its own"

Clay's at the bar beside her now "You okay?" he grabs her round the waist, kissing her neck.

"Yeah, just um.. just getting me a drink, and C.J a soda" she smiles "She's nice, CJ. I like her. I can't imagine what she's been, through"

"She tell ya?" Clay looks at her puzzled "That's unlike her, to talk to someone I mean, about anything really"

"Oh, I've just been picking up bits and pieces, from ya all putting it together."

"Yeah…" Clay nods "yeah I guess, you've hung out with the team quite a bit lately you gonna hear stuff" He's so use to being with the team, where they don't have secrets and he can imagine lately, discussing CJ , the baby the situation that things have leaked out…

"So, you and her?" Nancy questions him.

"Me and CJ? "Clay frowns, shaking his head "No , there's no us"

"Oh c'mon Clay…I've seen the way you look at her. You can't take your eyes off her"

"Look um… yeah, there was something, it was a while back but um…it's water under the bridge now. It didn't work out"

Nancy nods "Is she the kid's mom, JC is she his Mom?"

"She tell you that?"

"No! Just my guess, I mean it doesn't take much to put two and two together. At first I thougth it was his wife that died, but then the age didn't make sense so I… guessed"

He smiles and kisses her "You Nancy, you are smarter than you look!"

"Cheers. I'll take that as compliment, I think" she jokingly smacks Clay round the side of the head. "C'mon I'll let you win this time" she smiles and kisses him back.

C.J looks up from the pool table and catches Clay's eye. They both watch each other, as Nancy puts the drinks down on the side of the pool table. She takes a big sigh "Oh great, thanks Nancy, _another s_ oda just what I wanted!"

Nancy smiles, whispering in her ear "Um… I got them to add a little kick to that one!" she raises her eyebrows and smiles

C.J takes a sip. She smiles. "Nancy… I think we're gonna get on just fine. Cheers!"

o-o-o-o-o-o

C.J rubs her head it's feeling clouded and fuzzy. She definitely doesn't feel good, realising it's probably due to too many of the _'sodas'_ that Nancy keeps getting her. She sits in the chair by the wall and puts her head back, closing her eyes.

Jason frowns as he comes over to check on her. He kisses her lips and she smiles. Opening her eyes wide, looking him full in the face smiling as he continues to frown "You okay?" He's worried seeing how flushed her face is "CJ, have you been drinking?"

"Maybe, a little" she confesses, laughing

"Seriously? How much is a little?"

"A little. I don't know. Some…a couple, okay quite a few" she rubs her forehead with her palms. _Awww!_ She sighs "I'm tired. I wanna go home!"

"C'mon, let's get you out of here" He picks up her jacket.

Seeing them get up, Ray comes over to check on them "Hey Brother, everything okay? You leaving?"

"Yeah. Yeah, someone's had enough" Jason shakes his head, he's annoyed.

"Oh Man, she okay?" Ray looks at CJ

"She will be. I just need to get her back!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason's quiet, he doesn't want to cause an argument by saying something, not on the first full day back but this, this drinking already. It's worrying him.

Without saying a word, she heads to the bedroom, and lies down on the bed. Almost within seconds she's fast asleep.

Jason checks on JC, he's also sleeping. He's worried about him, worried about how CJ's been with him. That she has hardly even acknowledged him, that much yet.

He lays down next to her in the dark. He's thinking, wondering about what happened, wondering whats going on in her head. Wondering how he can help her.

He _sighs C'mon Jason, if she's gonna be like this you're gonna need a plan. You can't trust leaving her alone yet_. He lets out another long sigh and then closes his eyes to sleep.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

There's knock at the door, CJ presses pause on the TV and goes to answer it "Hey!" she frowns "Nancy, um.. what can I do for you?"

Nancy holds up a bottle wine in front of her "I have vacation day; thought you might like some company. I guess Jason's at work, like Clay is?"

CJ smiles and takes the wine from her hand "Um...yeah, yeah sure... come in "

"Thought we could have a girlie chat, movie and some wine?"

" _Um_..."C.J laughs "I don't really do girlie, but movie and drink, I can do that!"

They sit on couch, laughing and talking about the trashy movie they've been watching. Nancy pours the last of the wine into C.J's glass. CJ smiles "Hey steady I've already had more than you"

"Oh, you deserve it more than me, after everything you've been through" she smiles

"Cheers! Yeah guess I do deserve to relax a bit. You're right, to me!" She smiles "Thanks, I needed this. It's been great!"

JC starts crying. He's been asleep in the bedroom most of the afternoon _Oh shit!_ " I better go to him!"

As CJ stands up, she realises just how much wine she's drunken already. "Woah! think I need to ease up on that wine!"

"Shall I go, to sort the baby I mean?"

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, yeah it's fine. I'll fetch him"

She smiles as she brings him back to the living room "He's just so cute. You know the first time I saw him, when he was with Clay, I thought how cute they looked together"

"He was with Clay?" CJ frowns

"Yeah! He was looking after him for the afternoon. You know.. you'll laugh but I thought he was his!"

CJ laughs rubbing her hand on her forehead "You know I really don't feel too good, can you keep an eye on him. I need to lay down for a bit"

"Sure" Nancy smiles "I guess you drank a bit more of that wine than me, Go, have a lie down. I'm fine with him" She smiles as she checks the time on her cell phone. There's also a text from Clay and she responds

 _Hey you okay? Where are you? fancy dinner?_

 _I'm with CJ, looking after the baby_

 _Why?_

 _Because she's having a sleep, she's been drinking. I didn't want to leave the baby. I was worried._

 _Okay. Thanks. I'll come right away_

Nancy smiles at JC, she carries him, having a look around the house while its quiet.

"Hey!" Emma walks through the door

"Oh hey!" Nancy's startled she didn't even realise Emma was in the house

"You are?" Emma frowns, looking her up and down.

"Nancy! I um.. I'm Clay's girlfriend" she smiles "He's now coming to fetch me, so I'll be out of your way in minute "

"Oh okay. My dad here? What about her?"

"Who CJ? Um… she's lying down. She didn't feel too well, but your dads not here"

"Were you looking for something? Only I saw you looking in the drawers?"

"No, no just .. you know.." she sighs awkwardly

"Okay" Emma smiles "I'll leave you to it. I'm just in my room if you need me"

o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay arrives, just at the same time as Jason gets back "Hey! What's going on, why are you here?"

"Nancy's here. She said CJ wasn't well, so she's waiting with Jaycee. I came to check they're okay! Wasn't sure where you were"

"Just had to pick up Mikey, from Hockey practice. What's wrong with CJ?"

"Not sure. Nancy just said she wasn't well"

Jason enters the house, He takes JC from Nancy "So, what's going on?" He sees the bottle and a glass on the table

"Oh, she um...she didn't feel too well. So, she's having a lie down"

"She drink that?"

"Um.. not all of it I don't think. We were just having a girl's afternoon, watching a movie, glass of wine. Perhaps she did have a bit more than me. Sorry. I didn't know it was a problem" Nancy looks at Clay apologetically

"Hey…" Clay smiles "it's not your fault. CJ um.. probably best to knock the wine on the head in future" he smiles "She use to have a bit of a drink problem. Probably best not to encourage it"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

C.J comes round on the bed. Her head feels heavy and aching. She feels drowsy and as she looks up she can see Jason's standing in the doorway with JC "What's going on? CJ are you okay?"

"Yeah" she nods and smiles at him. She's lying, she feels awful.

He puts JC on the bed next to her "Here have him a minute I'll get you some water"

"No Jason, don't leave him here! I don't feel up to looking after him, not at the moment "

He completely ignores her, and leaves and she flops back down on the bed _Shit!_  
She sighs she can tell Jason's annoyed. She looks at JC sitting there, and she smiles, touching his cheek, stroking it with her finger. Then she pulls him closer, into her arms, laying him down next to her she closes her eyes. Then soon they've both fallen asleep.

Jason checks back, with the glass of water. He smiles, watching them both contentedly sleeping.

Clay and Nancy are still there tidying up. And Clay looks up as Jason comes back in the room "You think she's drinking again?"

Jason shrugs "It's only been a day. She'll be fine. I should have kept a better eye on this before it gets out of control."

"You know you can't leave her with JC, if we get spun up?"

"Yeah I know" Jason sighs "I'll start taking him back to Naima, she won't mind"

"You know.. look if it would help. Well, I've got some extended vacation time. I could take it off, then I could stay with her only if it would help? When needs be"

"Hey that kind" Clay smiles " but... we don't know when it'll be"

"Look being honest Clay, I know what you guys do" she shrugs "so it's not a problem. I really don't mind, and I think we get on okay. I'm sure she could do with some company, right? Plus, um…look, I think she probably needs bit of time. To readjust, with the baby and everything."  
She looks up she can see Clay and Jason both frowning looking worried "Hey guys, you need to give her a break. She's been through quite a lot. Trust me separating her and the baby, for most of the day. It's not going to help the situation"

Clay smiles he often thinks of Nancy as an airhead but she's much smarter than she first appears. "You know she could be right Jason. Maybe she needs to be with him, not kept apart?"

"Yeah. Yeah you're right I guess it might help. We'll give it a go. But only if you're sure?"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

 ** Next morning. **

*** **Bleep*** bleep*** bleep*** bleep** ***

"Hey, CJ wake up. C'mon, look I've gotta go" he shows her his phone

She yawns "Yeah okay" She smiles as he leans over and kisses her. She grabs at his neck, pulling him down on her, holding his lips against hers her tongue probing his mouth. Mmmm "Mr Hayes are you sure you have to go? I could think of something better to do"

JC laughs from his crib. Jason looks round to check him. She smiles "oops! I forgot about him. Come here" she looks him full in the face, studying him, her fingers feel the way around the lines _Mmmm!_ I could make you late if you wanted me to?"

"You could? And _what_ can you suggest that would make me late, Ms Lewis?" he kisses her neck

 _Mmmm!_ "I could show you" she smiles, sliding down under the sheet

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason gets dressed. Now he _is_ late now. "I really have to go"

"Are you sure?" she smiles and bites her lip teasing him Then she looks up as JC starts to cry again,

"You gonna be okay? Looking after him I mean?"

"Yeah, yeah don't worry I got this"

"Um... Nancy's gonna come over and keep you company? I mean only, if you want"

"Okay!" she nods "Yeah that be okay"

He lifts JC out the crib and onto the bed "Right, be good. The pair of you!" he kisses them both. "JC keep an eye on your Mom. Make sure she behaves" 

"Hey, you're Daddy saying I'm trouble" She smiles "We'll be fine"

"CJ, can I ask you something, something about him. I think its time we talked.. "

She leans up, silencing him with a kiss "Just go to work!. Go be a superhero. We'll talk when you get back. Now GO!" She smiles

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Nancy's leaving Clay's apartment after he left in the early hours. She pulls the door locked shut. She has movie and wine to take to CJ's but just as she's leaving, walking down the corridor, the mail man stops her.

Can you sign. Registered letter for Clay Spenser"

"Yeah, yeahs sure" she signs the pad. Then turning back, she realises she's locked the door now and rather than go back and unlock all over again she stick envelope in her purse

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Nancy knocks

"Hey! come in" CJ looking flustered as JC's full on, non-stop, crying. "Oh god am I glad you're here! He's not stopped crying since Jason left, and Emma went out!"

"Here let me take him" she smiles at JC "Hey little man, you missing your Daddy? You look stressed." She smiles "Don't worry. Look, why don't you have a bath or a shower. I brought a movie and some wine"

She smiles and winks "We'll get him settled and make another afternoon of it ? What do you say? Help you relax"

"Thanks" CJ smiles "You know Nancy, you're life saver. I think I will take a bath. Just yell if you need me!"

Nancy pours just one glass of the wine, which she then takes to CJ in the bathroom. "Here, relax!"

"Oh cheers"

"JC is settled now. He's fine. So, you take as long as you want" she smiles

CJ relaxes back into the hot water, closing her eyes. Half an hour later she opens them and gets out. Wrapping herself in a towel, she sits on the edge of the bath, gathering her thoughts. She doesn't know if it's the heat, but that wine has really gone to her head.

Her vision is blurry and her head fuzzy as she tries to shake the feeling off, going out into the cooler air of the living room

"Oh, you're out! "Nancy looks startled

"Yeah I got a bit hot in there, felt a bit dizzy. That wine must have gone to my head. I'd better get dressed. Is JC okay now?"

"Yeah he's fine" She looks up "Did you hear something ?" They both look round at the sound of the door opening. Jason walks in.

"Oh my god what the hell are you doing back already?" CJ shakes her head

"We got stood down" he smiles"

"Oh.. oh, does that mean Clay's back too? If it does then I'll get off. Give you some peace together."

"Nancy Thanks! You've been great today, keeping an eye on him while I had a bath, it really helped." she smiles "I'll see you later in the week and catch up again"

o-o-o-o-o-

CJ carries Jaycee through to his crib in the bedroom, he's just about asleep as she lays him down.

Jason follows behind her. And as she watches him sleeping he runs his hands over her bare shoulders down her arms. She closes her eyes to his touch and sighs as he presses himself against her from behind.

She can feel what he wants, and she smiles. He gently pushes her head to one side, kissing down her neck then turning her around to face him, he undoes her towel, dropping it to the floor. His hand gently caressing her now naked breasts.

She smiles and without a word she presses her naked body against him and face to face, he puts his hand on the side of her cheek, holding her as he kisses her and teasing his touch over the curves of her butt. Then he moves her, pushing her backwards until she has no choice but to sit on the bed.

"Did you want something Master Chief Hayes?" She smiles. She undoes the buckle on his belt. She can feel the tension as she release him from his pants and shorts. Sitting level with his semi hard cock she kisses it. Smiling as she teasingly licks her tongue down its length. Whilst he'd love to play this teasing game with her e can't. He wants her too much and pushing her back to lay down he positions himself between her thighs. His fingers find her the folds between her legs, and he massages against her clit, his fingers probing inside her, coating her wet around Mmmm she groans as he makes thrusting movement then kneeling down his tongue finding the small bud he licks at it. Sending her body into a frenzy Mmmm she groans again and again as each lick each thrust of his fingers. Her hand teasingly pulling at her own nipples Jason .. fuck me!" she gasps at him.

He smiles not saying a word he then lays his body over hers and replacing his fingers he thrusts his hard cock inside her.

 _Ahhh! God .. J_ _ason she moan breathless Oh…_

He smiles " _CJ_ … _Oh yeah!_ " he's panting needily now as he takes his tee shirt off.

They're kissing and both so really turned on. Him pushing harder and deeper inside her, lifting her knee, so he can get even deeper thrusts. Ohhhh! She cries out as he humps her hard " _Oh…_ J _ason! Don't stop!._... _Ahhh! Just don't stop!_ _Harder!_ "

Her breathing's fast and rapid now "O _h ...oh…. Ohhhh! Oh god!._ " she breaths deeply, she can feel her orgasm coming fast now filling every fibre of her body as she grips at his ass cheeks pulling him against her, grinding him against her clit until in a wet explosive moment she cums hard!

 _Ohhhh! Oh!_ she can't get her breath _Oh fuck! Mmmm !_

Her body shudders, her legs shaking as he pounds harder against her, his cock stiffens, twitching just before it shoots his creamy what liquid inside her. "Oh fuck! Yeah!" He smiles breathless _Oh god ….yeah!_

They both smiles. Relaxing in each other's arms as he looks at her in the eye. "You okay?" he smiles

"Yeah!" _Mmmm!_ "That was nice" she cuddles up against him and closes her eyes. It's not long before she's fallen asleep

"CJ I've gotta ask you something….."

He sighs, noticing she's gone to sleep. "Doesn't matter!" He holds her, wrapped in his arms, he and kisses the top other head and closes his eyes.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Nancy's been hanging out with CJ all week while the guys work but being honest, CJ's finding her all a bit too much now. Constantly there and constantly going on about her and Clay and about what they've been up to.

But then she does help by taking JC off her hands for lot of the time. Something she admits, only to herself, that she's finding him a struggle to cope with. She's just been so tired this week, it's not getting any better.

"You want some more Juice?" Nancy smiles from the kitchen doorway. They've had to stop the wine since Jason gave them a lecture.

"Yeah sure"

"JC's been crying a lot today" Nancy frowns as she hears him screaming in his crib

"Yeah! I don't know why; he cries such a lot that I just shut it out now "

"CJ are you okay? You sound very down and look really tired. Are you sleeping properly?"

"I don't know. Yeah I sleep all the time. I've got such a headache. You know what it weirdly feels like… " she laughs "…it feel like I've been drinking, and I haven't! in fact I felt better when I have been drinking" she sighs, taking another sip from the orange juice.

"I guess it's understandable, what with everything you've been through" Nancy smiles "Like a PTSD I guess. Just need some time. She smiles " Can I um.. ask you something? What was it like being …you know held captive, over there? I mean, I can't even try to imagine. Was it really bad "

C.J gulps, till now she'd tried to shut it all out, not talk about it. And now is not the time that she really wants to talk about. She wonders why she's asking. Has Clay been talking about it? "We'll all I can say is, anything like that that um….well training, it never really prepares you for it. Weirdly it kinda makes it worse. Unlike the other hostages you know what's coming." She sighs listing as she can hear JC still crying she rolls her eyes. "Not again!"

She closes her eyes, as this blinding exhausting tiredness comes over her body, she's hardly able to keep her eyes open.

"I'll go" says Nancy "take a minute. Try to get some fluid into you."

As Nancy comes back from the bedroom she can see CJ rubbing her head. The color gone from her face "CJ, are you okay? " she frowns "You don't look great"

C.J shakes her head "I don't feel well. There's something wrong with me! I feel like I'm drunk. I know I'm not. "

"I'll get you another drink" she gives her a worried smile "Perhaps you're dehydrated?" She brings a glass of water to her "Try this"

C. J shakes her head "No! No, I don't want it"

"Just drink it you'll feel better!"

She sighs as Nancy thrust the glass at her, forcing her to drink it. She closes her eyes, struggling to swallow it. She really can't get it down.

""Drink it all! Its only water. Believe me, it'll will make you better."

In fact, it has the opposite effect as she starts to feel sick. And she stumbles to the kitchen sink "What the fuck.. is wrong with me"

She feels hot and dizzy _Pheww!_ She takes deep breaths "Oh god...I'm gonna be sick "

She reaches over the sink, retching, trying to throw up "Nancy, can you ring Jason. Tell him I need him. I don't feel good! I mean I really don't feel good. He needs to come back for JC"

"Yeah! Are you sure, I think you just need to lie down? You'll be alright? "

The baby starts crying again. And the noise is loud in CJs head, she can't stand it. The noise going round and round "Just shut him up! Please JC shut UP!"

she screams putting her hands to her head. The pain, the dizzy feeling as she slumps down by the kitchen cabinet, banging her head the side, as she slides onto the floor.

As she grabs at the worktop trying to keep her balance she knocks Nancy's purse off, spilling the contents over the tiles. As she lays there she notices a small bottle of pills that drops out "What the..?" CJ tries to focus, but everything's blurring over. JC's still crying and it going through her head.

She can't think straight. Feeling hot, sick and dizzy, but she manages to pick the bottle up, she stares at it in her hand trying to focus on the contents, unable to make out the writing she puts the bottle in her hoodie pocket.

She can now hear noises from the living room, she frowns it sounds like someone's searching. It's Nancy she's frantically scouring the dresser cupboards.

CJ leans her head back on the cabinet, she hardly able to move. She feels paralyzed .

Then in the blurry fog of her head. She thinks she hears a man's voice. She tries to call out, but she can't even speak now.

"Hey what's going on?" Clay smiles as he takes Nancy by surprise

"Oh Clay! What the hell…" She smiles, closing the drawer that she was rummaging in "Hey, what you doing here?"

"I was coming to take you out for lunch" he frowns "Are you okay?"

"No um…." she swallows, trying to think what to say hard " It's um…CJ, she's not good!" she looks anxiously at him "I was um… ... looking for her phone. So, I could call I think you better take a look!"

"Why what's wrong with her?"

"Just come see…. I think she might have been drinking or .. even taken something. I really don't know"

Clay comes into the kitchen, immediately he can see CJ slumped on the floor. He panics "CJ... CJ what's going on?"

"I just found her like that" Nancy says " Do you think she took something a pill or something? I mean she's been funny all morning, JC was crying, she was stressed with is . She said she was tired ,then I just found her like this"

C.J can hear them but it's like she's underwater. She's desperately trying to speak to Clay. Shaking her head in frustration, trying to get her words out but she can't

The baby's screaming again and Nancy goes to him. Picking him up, comforting him. She brings him to the doorway but the noise, its hurting CJs ears and she starts to scream, gasping as the noise hurts her head. She manages to cover her ears with her hands

"Should I take him out for a bit, while you sort her out. It's not good for him to see her like this?"

" Um… yeah!" Clays breathing fast, he's trying to get her into the recovery position while he works out whats going on "Yeah that's a good Idea. I need to get Jason. I think you're right she's taken something"

"Sure, I'll um...I'll take him for a walk around the block. Get some fresh air, He doesn't need to see his Mom like this. Oh Clay, I hope she's gonna be alright." She sighs "Clay…. I'm sorry. For everything"

"It's fine, Nancy, it's not your fault. She's been like this before. We should have got her some help when she got back. I'll get Jason, we'll sort it don't worry!" she smiles at her "just take JC Like you say he doesn't need to see this"

Clay picks up his and call Jason as Nancy puts the baby in the buggy and grabbing her purse from teh kitchen floor "I'll be back soon" she smiles "Clay I….I ….I really hope she's okay?"

He sits on the floor with her trying to make sense of what going on "C.J did you take something? Can you tell me what? CJ, can you hear me?"

"I… I'm … she gulps her words are mumbled "I'm gonna .. be sick"

"Okay... alright, let's get you up then!" he lifts her from the floor, leaning her over the sink gets her up and leans her over the sink. "C.J can you tell me what you took?"

she shakes her head "The juice"

"You want some juice don't drink anything else if you feel sick, CJ, what pills did you take?" Clay keeps asking and she keeps shaking her head _Shit!_ Clay starts to panic as she starts to uncontrollably shake.

He holds her while she's still leaned over the sink. She keeps reaching like she's going to be sick but isn't

"What's the hell's going on?" Jason frowns as he stands in the doorway

"I don't know" Clay looks around at him worried "Nancy said she thinks she's been drinking I think she's taken something, but I don't know what"

"CJ!... What did you take?" Jason tries to get some sense out of her "CJ Can you focus and listen to me. We're trying to help you, but I need to know what you took"

She's still shakes her head, as she slides from Clay's grip onto the floor again, the small bottle of pills to drops out of her pocket. Clay and Jason look at each other as Clay scoops them up

"God Damn! What are these? Clay call 911" he holds the bottle it in front of her "CJ how many of these have you taken?" he shakes her trying to get her to answer

"Oh god! Clay sighs "You don't think she's ….. not again?!"

She shakes her head, forcing her words out "They're….. not.. mine!" she keeps shaking her head, but he doesn't believe her. And he leans her against the cabinet Everything's cloudy and blurred

"They wanna know what she's taken?" Clay asks while he holds on the phone to he ear

Jason looks at the label and reads it out to him " _Midazolam.._..." then he stops, staring at Clay "Where's Nancy?"

" _Um_... she took JC for a walk. For some fresh air. He was crying" Clay frowns at the look on Jason's face. He suddenly feels worried "Jason what's wrong?"

" _Where,_ did she take him?" Jason's voice is panicked

"Um.. just around the block. I don't know exactly, not far I guess. They'll be back soon. Jason is there a problem?"

"How long? How long have they been gone?"

"Twenty minutes, maybe a bit longer. I don't know exactly. Jason you're worrying me now ... what is it? "

"She's right, CJ she's right. These pills, they're not hers. They're Nancy's!" he shows Clay the name on the label

"Shit! what the hell's going on?"

"CJ, did Nancy give you these? Did she give you these pills or anything else?" CJ closes her eyes; her breathing becomes shallow "C.J... stay awake! Come on I need to know what did Nancy give you"

She flutters her eyes open "Juice… the juice."

"We have to find her! We have to find Nancy, she's got the baby!"

Jason suddenly switches mode, his team Leader, takes over. "Clay, call the others tell them to go around the block. Look for her. Get Trent to come straight here"

Clay takes his orders and gets on with calling the others

"Alright, C.J let's get you up, we need to get those tablets up!" Holding her with one hand he reaches in the cabinet, taking out a packet of salt, then taking a glass he fills it with water mixing the saline solution "Okay this is not going to be good . I'm sorry but you need to drink"

He holds the glass to her lips "Drink"  
She shakes her head as he leans her head back tipping it against her lips she chokes coughing and retching as he forces more into her mouth "Drink it! All of it"

She struggles gagging on the salty liquid "I can't!" _Arrrhhh urrrghh_ she continues to gag.

Hold he looks at Clay and as he does Jason takes the glass, holding her nose as he forces the liquid down her She nearly chokes trying to push hi away as Clay holds her tight he closes his eyes to what they're forcing her to do. Then all of a sudden the glass is empty and Jason leans her over the sink. As he retches into the bowl

"Good girl!" He frowns as the contents of stomach come up, and she continues to vomit the salty mixture up. Finally as she stops and unsteady on her feet he takes hold of her. "It's gonna be okay!

They settles her on the couch, and she leans back, closing her eyes "Hey, no no no! Don't go to sleep." Jason looks around the living room, he can see all the drawers and cupboards are open "What the hell happened here?"

Clay looks around "I arrived, and she was like this, Nancy she was over there looking in drawers, said she was looking for a cell "

C.J leans forward she feels sick again and Jason places a bowl in front of her.

Trent and the others arrive, behind him "Trent, great can you deal with her we've called 911. This is what she gave her" he hands the bottle of pills to Trent

"The rest of us need to get out there! We need to find this Nancy. She's got my son. We need to do it fast. I've got a bad feeling about this!"

o-o-o-o-o-o

They drive around the block, several more times. They've looked everywhere but can't see her anywhere. An hour has gone by since they left and now they report to Blackburn and he calls the police

CJ's asleep in the bedroom while Trent's keeps an eye on her

 _SHIT!... Fuck!_ Jason screams "Where the _HELL_ is she?"

Clay swallows hard. He's feeling so bad and doesn't know what to do he looks up as Ray and sonny get back from their searches "Sorry! There's nothing, no sign of her anywhere."

Jason sits down on the couch his head in hands, he looks up as C.J staggers through from the bedroom. She looks terrible, pale and confused. She sits herself down next to him and buries her head in his chest as he holds her tight, kissing her head. "We'll find him. I promise... We'll get him back"


	29. Chapter 29

**Chapter 29: the Lunch Date**

They've checked everywhere but not a sign anywhere of Nancy, or the baby. No demands, no sightings.

"Nothing!" Jason sighs, rubbing his head "It's like they disappeared into thin air!"

Clay looks up at from the sink, he's lost in his own thought "You know, I can't believe I fell for her. I should have been more careful"

He's thinking about Nancy, how they met. The way she just asked him out that day .how much she seemed to know, but the fact when he thought about he actually knew nothing about her. She played him and now he feels so bad.

 _If anything happens to that baby. I won't ever be able to forgive myself._

Jason's still stood in the doorway. "So, where's she live, this Nancy? We need her address. Not that she'd be stupid enough to go there. What about contacts for any of her friends"?

"Jason…" he swallows hard before speaking "..I'm sorry but I don't know"

"What do you mean, _you_ don't know? What the fuck." He frowns "How the hell can you not know?"

"I don't know. She always stayed at mine. I just never thought about asking where she lived. It wasn't really that kind of relationship, I didn't see it being a long-term thing" He sighs, frowning, rubbing his head "It was just a casual thing. I'm so sorry"

"I can't believe you don't know _anything_ about her. She never said a thing?"

"Look Jace, I'm sorry, but who the hell had any idea she'd do this?"

"If anything happens to my son, god help you! Cos, right now, I'm holding you responsible"

"C'mon Jace, you can't hold this over me" Clay bites his lip "Don't you think I care as well?"

"Don't go there." Jason snaps back, warning him "Don't you dare go there, not now!"

"Okay….okay but … "

" _No_ buts! You, understand me?" Jason clenches his fist, then releasing as he calms himself.  
 _Why is this kid always, knows how to press my buttons?_

Jason walks away

Clay looks down, he's thinking. He so wants to ask the question, that everyone's been avoiding. But right now, mainly for CJ's sake, he decide he will leave it. Hopefully it won't be long until those results come back.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

C.J's starting to feel a lot better. _This is why I felt so tired. A ll those drinks she kept getting me. It's why she kept coming every day. I bet she's been giving me that stuff in all week._

She heads into the bathroom and washes her face with cold water. As she dries herself, she buries he head in the towel. Leaning her forehead, to rest on the wall. Taking deep slow breaths while she greats her thoughts together. _Oh, JC where are you?_ She starts to sob.

Jason knocks quietly at the door as he enters the small room. He puts his hands on her shoulders to comfort her, but she shakes him off

"Jason just leave me alone" she sighs. She's frustrated and feeling very tearful. She doesn't want him to see her like this because she hates being so vulnerable.

He ignores her, pulling her body against his, wrapping his arms around her. She sighs, Glad that he does. She leans her head on his chest and closes her eyes as he kisses the top of her head "We'll sort this. I promise. We'll find him, we'll get him back"

"How?" She looks at him and frowns "How will we get him back? We have no idea where he is"

He closes his eyes, trying desperately to hold his own tears in, trying to protect her from his pain "We will, just trust me."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

 ** Two days later **

Blackburn's stood BRAVO down because of the situation with the missing child. But the powers that be are pushing from higher up for the to be back in the field.

 _"Commander Blackburn, whilst we appreciate the emotional distress on Master Chief Hayes, there is no reason for an entire DEVGRU team to stand down."_ Was the message being pushed loud and clear at him .

But he knew for them to operate at their best, he would need for them all to be focused.  
"No good sending out a team that can't focus on the task they're assigned" his steadfast reply. Though he wasn't sure how much longer that was going to wash with them

Jason speaks with C.J about Eric's dilemma. "They want us back in the field. They're pushing Eric hard for it now"

"Just go!" She sighs "You have to… we both know how it works. You're part of a system and they need you up and operating. We both know emotion doesn't come into this. You have a job to do, so go do it" She smiles, kissing him firmly on the lips as he holds her in his arms

"CJ, I don't know" He frowns, pushing the loose strands of hair from off her face "Whilst I'd be glad of something to do. I'm not happy about leaving you, here alone. Not with this all going on!"

"Jason, it's what you do!" she smiles "It's okay, I know how it works. Don't forget I did it long enough myself. Anyway, there's nothing you can do here, not until we hear something, anyway. As soon as we do, then I'm hoping you're gonna use your skills and go get our boy back

She lets out a long sigh, watching his face filled with hurt, frustration and the tearing dilemma about what he's being asked to do "Jason, I know more than you that he brass are not gonna sit around waiting for BRAVO forever. Jason you have two choices, either you let your team get back operational and stand yourself down as team leader or, you go back to work and leave me here on my own."  
She kisses him "And we both know what's the right thing to do. So, go call Blackburn, tell him you're going back to work, tomorrow"

She feels like she's stuck in a waking nightmare. And on top of that she really feels the need for a drink. Though there's nothing in the house, Jason's made absolutely sure of that.

Mandy arrives, she's looking for an update. She was the one who sorted _cover stories_ with the police, so that the abduction of a Navy seals son, doesn't make it out into the media.

C.J feels so helpless and frustrated that she can't do anything. All of her official security clearance and computer access has been revoked. And of her own sources, she has no idea who she can trust right now to get her information from. So, all she can do is sit tight and wait. It's frustrating and feels like it's driving her insane. Feeling so helpless is certainly not something she's used to.

She sighs, getting up from the couch she heads into the kitchen to get herself another glass of water. If she's honest she's fed up with drinking water but Trent's advice to Jason, and then him to her was drink as much water possible to flush the toxins from her system. So, both of them have warn her down with their continual reminder. _Drink more water CJ_

Mandy comes to the kitchen and joins her "So, how you holding up?" she smiles

It seems strange, to be holding a conversation with Mandy, although they've known each other for years, they don't know a lot about each other as they hardly ever speak and its some unwritten code that's accepted that they don't really like each other.

C.J knows Mandy always thought badly about her, because of what happened with Jason in the past and in turn C.J doesn't really like her, much of it because she always thought that she held some desire for Jason. And in CJs opinion, she flirted with him much too openly

"Yeah, I'm holding in there. Like I've got any choice. Funny, I thought Damascus was tough, but emotionally, this is a rougher ride"

Mandy's phone starts to ring "Oh I'm sorry but I just need to take this" She smiles turning her back, hushing her voice to whisper. A whisper that CJ can still hear "Reuben .. hey, how are you?" she smiles at the sound of his voice. It gives he this warm, mellow feeling inside "Sorry, yeah I left a message. It was just to say I have a bit of a situation and I'll be about half an hour, late for our lunch date"

As she talks on the phone C.J's listening intently. She can't hear his reply, but she's definitely getting the just of the conversation from what Mandy says.

"Yeah, yeah of course we're still on, it's just as I say, something came up that needs my attention. I need to do a couple things first and then I'll be with you. I'll meet you at the restaurant."

CJ can hear him speaking and as Mandy glances around at her she can see that she's blushing "We'll see!" she smiles, now looking in CJs direction. Noticing that she's listening to their conversation "Look Reuben, I have to go. I'll see you just after one"

"Lunch date?" C.J frowns curious

"Um.. yeah. Just an old friend" she smiles, blushing again.

"Oh, I don't know, he doesn't sound so old to me!"

"Well…he's not old in the age sense, but in the friend sense. We're kinda picking up where we once left off" she coughs and then does an embarrassed smile

 _Mmmm_ "Good type of friend to have" C.J nods "So, who is he? Spook wise I mean, agency or CIA… or maybe Homeland? I hear those boys are very interesting!" She smiles

"Ha!" Mandy laughs "That obvious am I? Um... I'm not sure which category you would put him, he's more kind of… of independent. Yeah independent, that's the best way I could describe him. Oh, he started out CIA, years ago but um…" for a moment she is guarded in her answer then she realises who she's talking to and realises perhaps she doesn't have to be quite so ".. he's into more covert things, these days, He's… he's very complicated" she laughs

"Seems you like him though. I mean I can tell by your face you like him a lot" C.J smiles

"We'll see"

"Hey, what's stopping you? I mean If you like him the go for it, right?"

"Oh, I don't know really, there's just lots of complications. There's always going to be something, gets in the way and he's one of those people you can never be sure that hes trustworthy, that he's not playing you"

Mandy checks at the doorway that Jason and the others can't hear her "but um…well, he's English, so there's something about his accent that just drives me crazy" she laughs

Mmmm! CJ smiles "I always did love an English accent on a guy. Definitely been there with that though." she laughs "So, then where's he taking you, somewhere good I hope?"

"Yeah, The Capri Room"

Hmmmm! "Wow, nice! Very suave and, very pricey" C.J smiles "Just make sure you order something very, very expensive, and of course when he insists then you let him pay!"

Jason's at the doorway, and they both stop talking "You two okay in here?"

C.J nods "yeah! Yah... just girls talk" she winks at Mandy "Okay, she sighs "So back to reality. What do we do next?"

"Well I'll do some more digging, on Nancy, I've got some more contacts to try, and we'll see what they can turn up" she pauses "but till we get a demand, or some sort of contact. We just have to sit tight." she looks up at Jason "Look, I'm sorry I can't offer you more than that. I am trying everything to locate him." She takes a quick glance at her watch "Look, I'm gonna head off" She smiles at CJ, and puts her hand Jason's arm reassuring him "Jason, you hold in there"

C.J watches the way she touches him. It makes her feel jealous in a weird kind of way. She sighs "Have a nice lunch! Don't do anything that I wouldn't do"

Mandy stops, turning she looks at her "I'll try not to"

"What's that all about?" Jason frowns

"Nothing" she smiles "Oh, she's got a lunch date, with a new guy."

"You're okay though?" he puts his arms around her neck and kisses her forehead.

She nods. "Yeah, yeah I'm fine. Fed up with drinking this water though" she tips the water down the sink

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Laying on the bed she stares at the empty crib. She' thinking about things, getting her head straight.

"Hey" Jason checks on her "What're you doing?"

"Nothing just thinking! How about you, you okay?"

"Yeah I'm fine. The guys are just doing another sweep of the block. See if they can turn up anything we missed"

"They won't find anything" she sighs "Jason this was professional. They won't leave traces. We won't find him, not until they want us to"

"Let's keep hoping. Look Clay and me, we're gonna go to his, check out if she left any stuff there. Any clues to her whereabouts"

"Come here" she smiles, beckoning him towards her "You say everyone's out?"

"Yeah why?"

"Cos, I just wanted some alone time with you for a while. There's been so much coming and going that I've hardly had any time with you" she sighs "Just come and hold me"

"You come here!" he smiles, standing at the end of the bed. She crawls towards him, then kneeling up in front of him he wraps his hand around her head, kissing her. It's so nice, comforting. His hands stroking down her back.  
Then he pushes her tee shirt up over her head, he pulls it off, slowly smoothing his hand over her bare skin, pushing her bra strap from her shoulder he kisses down her neck working his way down her chest.

Mmmm! "Oh, that nice" She closes her eyes enjoying the intimate closeness between them. She smiles staring him in the eyes as she undoes his belt.

He pushes her back, laying her down on the bed "You okay?" he smiles, pulling his pants and shorts off as he lays on top of her, kissing, thrusting his tongue wantonly in her mouth.

The comfort of him so close is just what she needs as he kisses down her chest and stomach..

 _Mmmm!_ She moans as he gets to the edge of her panties. He slides his finger inside the elasticated waist. Then she puts her hand on his "Jason stop! _Shhh!._.. listen!"

"JASON?...Jace!" They frown as they hear Sonny's voice shouting

"Boss, where are you?"

 _SHIT!_ "It's Sonny back!" she closes her eyes and laughs,

"Jace are you in…." Sonny's head comes around the open bedroom door _Oh SHIT! Jesus!_ "Hey, I'm sorry!" He frowns as he leaves, embarrassed

 _Hmmm!_ "Can you believe it!" she laughs again, biting her lip "Looks like we'll have to give that a miss then" Jason carries on kissing her as she holds him round the neck. "Guess you better go see what he wants"

"Yeah I guess" he smiles, kissing her one more time "CJ, I love you!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Right! We're off to Clay's. See if she left anything there. Will you be okay, here on your own."?

She nods her head "Yeah I'll be fine but there won't be anything there. I told you, this is professional. They'll have cleaned up loose ends, but do it, if you think it will do any good." she sighs "Look, I um… I might head out for a while, just get some fresh air as well"

"You sure? You wanna wait I'll come with you."

"No, I'll be fine. Just gonna walk around the block. Clear my head for a while."

"Okay, well don't go far. And be careful, alright?" he kisses her "Oh and CJ, don't do anything stupid!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"I'll have the um…. seafood Alfredo and a large white wine spritzer please" Mandy smiles at the waiter

"You know Mandy this might be presumptuous of me, but um...I took the liberty of booking a suite" he smiles

"Really? And I thought this was just lunch?"

"Well that's entirely up to you" he smiles, kissing her hand "but I was ...I was hoping for dessert"

"Don't you have something else you should be doing? Like some actual work."

"I'd much rather have dessert with you"

She bites her lip, watching him. Her brains ticking over and she's wondering about asking him for help. Asking if he can do anything to find Jaycee. She decides not to. Thinking she might bring it up later.

o-o-o-o

Their food arrives, and they start to eat when someone comes to the table.

Reuben looks up from his food

"C.J! Um…are you okay?" Mandy frowns, concerned and surprised by her presence "Can I do something for you? Oh god! Is there some news? Is everything alright?"

She frowns, CJ doesn't reply to her "Are you okay? Do you need to sit down" Mandy's really worried about her now?

CJ shakes her head, slowly as she stares at Reuben "Where is he?" She asks coldly she doesn't take her eyes off him.

He coughs, wiping his mouth as he puts down his fork. He continues to stare at her but doesn't say anything just takes a sip from his drink.

"You son of bitch!" she screams at him "Where the hell is _my_ son?"

Now he turns to face her and smiles "Catherine!" he pauses as he slowly takes another sip of his drink "Well, well. What do I owe this honour? It must have been a while since I've seen you. How are you?" he smiles "You look well... all things considered"

"Don't fuck with me Reuben" her tone is so angry with him "Where is he?"

He smirks, shaking his head "I have absolutely no idea what you are talking about. But you seem upset so please sit down, join us.

"I said where the hell is he?"

She's frustrated but his smug attitude and placing her hands on the table she leans forward into his face "Where…is he?!

He coughs, folds his napkin placing it on the table then he lets out a deep sigh. She's annoyed him with her timing and attitude, and he leans forward towards her, and in a hushed but stern tone he answers her "Catherine...a word of advice. _DON'T_ make a scene here! I can assure you that it wouldn't be a wise move"

She stands silently staring at him. Mandy's confused, and worried by the conversation going on between them "Okay, one of you going to tell me what's going on? Do you two know each other?"

"Unfortunately. " CJ sighs, still staring at him "Yes, we've had dealings in the past"

"Oh, come now Catherine." He laughs " Don't' be so modest. I would say, it was more than _dealings"_ he smiles "in fact I'd go as far as to say that we know each other intimately, wouldn't you?"

"That was long time ago Reuben" she frowns, shaking her head dismissing his statement

Hmmm! Let me think about that because, I'm not so sure that the last time was actually that long ago" he sits back in his seat, and takes a drink "In fact now I think back, I remember it quite well"

"Don't flatter yourself. You were never that memorable. I've easily forgotten it"

"Really" he frowns "Now see, I would say that was impossible"

"What's going on?" Mandy looks at C.J she gets the impression from the conversation she may not be the first to have fallen for his charms, or maybe him to CJ's

Reuben stands up and grabs the top of her arm tightly "I'm sorry. If you ll just excuse us, Ms Ellis. I need a quick word with Ms Lewis in private" he glares at her "I'll have to extend my apology to you, for her interrupting our lunch"

"C.J?" Mandy frowns "Should I do something"

"No, its fine! We're fine, really." she sighs "Just leave it"

He drags C.J to the corridor, shoving her in the lift. And then once the lift doors closes, his pleasant charming demeanour ceases and he angrily grabs her by the throat. Shoving her back hard against the lift wall "Do NOT EVER do anything like that again. Coming here and trying to embarrass me!"

She fights with him, pulling his hand off her. She pushes him back "Don't you touch me! I want to know where the hell MY son is, Reuben!"

He smirks and composes himself "Oh your son? Your son is perfectly fine. At least for the time being" he straightens his tie in the lift mirror and stops the lift at floor six.

"Catherine understand I am being pushed to deal with this situation. So, you might want to keep that in mind. Did you know there is a whole black market in adoptions? It's a fairly lucrative one too." he smirks at her "All those poor, desperate couples in many countries, waiting to buy a child. One I just so happen to have" he threatens her

She shakes her head at him and steps forward towards him her hand raised. "I swear to god Reuben you do anything to my son or if I don't get him back... "

He grabs at her hand stopping her "And you'll what? Oh, send Hayes after me? Don't threaten me Catherine"

"It won't Jason coming after you. I promise you. It'll be me coming myself if you hurt him." She gulps, knowing Reuben as well as she does, she knows he never threatens things he won't go through with "You really have changed, haven't you?"

"Oh, we all do Catherine. I call it adapt and survive" he smiles "that was something your Father might have done well to learn. Rather than growing a conscience. All those years we worked on deals, and I never saw that coming. How he'd try to sell us all down the river, even you Catherine"

She bites her lip and doesn't answer as the lifts stops and he forcefully pushes her out. He takes out the key card for his suite and unlocks the door.

"Where is he, Reuben?" she pleads as he pushes her into the room "That's better. Now we have some privacy to discuss this"

He pours two whiskeys in a glass from the drinks cabinet and offers one to her

"No thanks"

"Please don't try to tell me you're not drinking?" he shakes his head. disbelieving "You have changed then" he sips his, standing hers on the table next to her. He smiles "Just in case you change your mind"

He puts his hand on her cheek "Such a shame this has to be all about business this time. I seem to remember the pleasure side was so much more fun!"

She brushes him off "I hear the CIA is your thing these days. Would seem your standards have slipped somewhat"

"You could be right. I may have lowered the bar, but it does some fairly attractive benefits" he smiles "though can't say she's as …open minded as you were. Little more uptight about things in the bedroom." He smiles as he thinks back to their time together, he touches her face again.

"You disgust me" she brushes his hand off

 _Hmmm!_ "If only I thought you meant that. Though from what I hear your standards may also have slipped, Tut! Tut! Revisiting past mistakes. Never a good look"

"You really are a son of a bitch aren't you!"

"Now, enough of the pleasantries" He backs her against the wall "Have you come here to offer me something or not?"

"That depends on where my son is"

 **"** I told you. He's safe. But Catherine that safety does depend on what you can offer me."

She frowns "I can't believe you're doing this to me, putting me through this. You'd really do anything for that list?" she shakes her head "Is it the money? What, you're gonna sell it to the highest bidder, give it to the side who pays most?"

"You know better than that" he steps up closer to her "That list is power. Those that control that list, hold all the power " he smiles "Anyway you should be grateful"

She frowns confused "Grateful? For what you're putting me through?"

"Grateful to me! For persuading people that I can get that list. It's the only thing that's kept you alive until now, but my patience is running out"

She gulps as he puts his hand on her neck slowly caressing down her chest. He's up really close and she tries to pull away

"Of course, if you wanted to offer a repeat of a past performances, as a deal sweetener. I wouldn't say no" he smiles

She closes her eyes at the thought and shakes her head "Get the hell away from me!"

"Oh, c'mon, it's not like you to say no" he runs his hand down her side, then up over her breast, caressing her. He slowly pulls his hand to the bottom of her shirt, sliding his hand up inside. Feeling her naked skin underneath.

She smiles, putting her hand on his cheek, and then by surprise she kisses him "Is that what you want?" she stares fully in the eyes at him

"Do you?" he smiles at her "I never remember you saying, no ever before. In fact, from memory, you used to quite like it, especially in your father's office if I recall"

She shakes her head "Would that get me my son back? Because if that's what it takes"

"Sorry Catherine " He laughs "as lovely as your offer is it's just not enough for that" He walks away and picks his drink up again; he also brings hers over to her "I need something a little more tangible this time" he hands her the whiskey glass.

She's upset and wipes a single tear off her cheek then runs her hand through her hair and drinks the whiskey. She needs it.

"So, my question stands. Do you have what I want?"

She takes a deep breath holding back tears "Maybe, but I need to see my son, see he's alive first"

He smiles. "That can be arranged" He picks up his phone. She watches him and takes another sip from the drink

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Mandy's still downstairs in the restaurant. She doesn't know what's going on. She's worried they've been gone so long.

She goes to the front desk to ask for the room number, but the receptionist says she can't find any rooms booked in his name.

Now, Mandy's not sure what to do. She nervously rubs her hand through her hair and then goes and sits back at the table to wait. She drinks her wine and orders another before calling up Jason's number in her phone. She hesitates and doesn't dial it Shit! What should I do?

She dials Reuben's number instead, but that just goes to voicemail. She rubs her head and drinks some more wine.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Now what?" CJs confused at what he's doing

"We wait" he smiles "It won't take long, I promise." He sits on the bed and smiles "Unless you wanted to pass the time some other way?"

"Go to hell!" she drinks the rest of the drink and pours herself another. He hand is shaking. She really doesn't know what he's playing at.

Reuben watches her and smiles "You haven't changed as much as I thought"

The both turn at the sudden knock at the door. C.J turns to go to open it, but before she can move he grabs her. Pulling her body against his, grabbing a hold of her ponytail, he yanks her head back and pushes a gun under her chin

"You're going to see your son but don't do anything silly" he unlocks and opens the door to find Nancy standing there holding a sleeping J.C against her shoulder. "Wait there!"

"Oh my god!" She closes her eyes and sighs she shakes her head, struggling to get away from "Why? " she frowns at Nancy "Why are you helping him? I thought we were friends. Why didn't you come to me? tell me what the was doing. We could have helped you"

 _Shhh!_ He rubs his cheek on her cheek "Don't wake him. Catherine don't blame Nancy; she has a lot to lose too. I've got to say Catherine, he is such a gorgeous child. Must have good genes"

"Please, just let me hold him" she begs

Reuben nods "You can go now!"

"I'm sorry" Nancy sighs and walks away.

"NO! No, Reuben please!" she pleads, trying to pull away. She can't.

"NOW!" he pulls her neck and head towards him "Now, listen carefully" he whispers in her ear "Get me what I want, and next time, you can walk away with him "

"If I do then how do I know this will be over? You're not the only one looking for that list"

"You'll have to take me at my word. You walk away, start again where no one knows you." He pauses " You know, I would never willingly hurt him, and I will find him a nice couple. One that really wants him. Just because it's you." he smiles as he threatens her

She closes her eyes she feels sick. He shuts the door and pushes her back against the closed door and runs his hands down her looking her in the eye smirking "Twenty-four hours, Catherine. That's how long you've got!"

He lets her go and turns while he finishes his drink. He straightens his suit "Shall we" he points the way out "Ms Ellis will be wondering where we got to"

They take the lift down to the restaurant they don't say a word. She's trying to stifle her tears as they find Mandy still sitting at the table.

She stands up as they come back and as they walk to the table he clicks his fingers at the waiter "May I have the bill please. Mandy, I'm sorry to have kept you. Things took a little longer than we anticipated"

he signs the bill "Nice seeing you again Catherine. It was a total pleasure as always. We must do it again, very soon" He smiles and kisses her on the cheek. She feels sick at his touch "Now if you excuse me ladies, I have a pressing matter to attend to" He smiles at them both and walks away

"What the hell is going on?" Mandy sees the look on C.J's face. It worries her "Are you alright? Did he hurt you? Where the hell did you go?"

C.J closes her eyes, runs her hands through her hair and rubs her forehead _FUCK! Pheww!_ She sighs. But she doesn't answer Mandy.

Then without a word she up and walks away, heading straight to the hotel bar and Mandy's left standing not knowing what to do.

"Can somebody tell me what the hell is going on here?"


	30. Chapter 30

**Chapter 30: Listen to yourself. Don't Trust him**

"Whiskey straight!" she demands from the barman. Knocking it back in one go. Coughing as the fiery liquid hits the back of her throat she smiles. It tastes good, especially after so long of not drinking.

"And another!" She grins at the bartender "And, just keep them coming, until I say stop. Oh, the room number is 620, put them on the tab"

"Bad day?" he asks

"Yeah, something like that"

"C.J ..." Mandy hesitates to speak, having been watching her drinking "What's happened?"

"Oh god, are you still here?"

"This isn't going to do any good. Let me help you"

" You can't, you can't help me now. No one can. I have to sort this myself"

"Well you won't be able to do that, not if you carry on drinking like this. This is stupid" she frowns "Let me take you back or at least, let me call Jason."

" _Just….leave me ALONE!"_ she turns glaring at Mandy "If I want to drink, then I will. Oh, and don't be calling anyone, especially Jason. I don't need him here"

Mandy sighs. she doesn't know what to do "CJ, what's going on with Reuben? Is there something between you and him I should know about?"

"You know what? You should listen to yourself, and not trust him. If I were you, I'd get as far away from him a you possibly can. You don't know him or anything about him."

"No more!" Mandy looks up at the barman, watching him pouring her another drink. He looks across at C.J, asking what he should do.

"Oh, ignore my mother. Just keep them coming!"

"I'm telling you, _this..._ this is not going to help, anything. CJ, I'm contacting some people this afternoon, see what intel I can pull. We will find him" she tries to sound reassuring, but CJ ignores her and carries on drinking. "Okay, well if you won't stop then I'm gonna get Jason." She picks up her phone and calls his number

"Yeah sure great!" She sighs " Go get Jason. Yeah make my day" she shakes her head "None of you can help, _you_ can't find my son"

"Yes, we can, and we will! Just give me some more time. But please, just stop drinking and let's sort this"

"There is no more time. You don't get it do you! He's not lost. I know exactly who's got him, and what I have to do to get him back" she rubs her forehead with the palm of her hand watching as Mandy leaves a voicemail for Jason

"Jason ... call me urgently, when you get this"

"Oh, did you forget to add _love Mandy_ on the end of that message " C.J sarcastically replies

"Sorry, what? Why did you say that?" Mandy frowns "You do know there's nothing going on, with me and Jason. We're just friends"

"Oh, c'mon, you're practically all over him, most of the time" she sips for her drink, laughing "What you wanna get in his good books, by making me look bad" she drinks some more "Hoping..." she laughs "That he wants to get in your panties, right?"

Mandy scowls as C.J hits a nerve "You know, you really can be a nasty piece of work when you want!" she shakes her head "Just when I was feeling sorry for you, wanting to help you. You then go and say something like that. Why do you do it?"

"Oh yeah, cos... damn the truth hurts, doesn't it!" she sneers "Well, I don't need your sympathy. That's why you never liked me isn't it, you always saw me as competition. Getting in your way on the path to Jason's bed. Cos you know" she laughs " I just click my fingers and he comes running"

Mandy's been warned about her by Sonny and Ray, so many times. But now she can see what she's like with her own eyes. She doesn't like it, but she ignores her, changing the subject

"CJ, if you know where he is then why didn't you tell Jason? Then they can get him back" she frowns "Instead of keeping quiet, we could go get him" She runs her hand through her hair "Does this have something to do with Reuben?"

"Oh, give me a break! Are you really that naïve? I was told you were intelligent but now I wonder" C.J laughs "He was using you. He set this entire thing up. He set up every move you made, manipulated you. It's what he does That's what he's good at"

She takes a large sip of her drink "You're a fool if you don't know that" she laughs "You don't mean anything to him, it's all a game, his little mind games" She shakes her head "Reuben always makes damn sure that hes on the winning team no matter the cost" Exhausted and tired she sighs, drinking the whiskey until the glass is empty. She puts it on the bar in front of her "Another!" she nods at the bar man.

Mandy glares at him, shaking her head as he still pours the drink "You do know that he helped, get you back?" Mandy tries to engage her in conversation, attempting to slow her drinking down "He was the one, behind the intel, to get you back, from Damascus" she pauses "He let me know where you were, so that we could bring you back"

C.J can't stop laughing "You know the fact you believe that, it's tragic. I've known Reuben a long time and trust me. he feels nothing for anyone. He manipulates everyone. He gave you that intel, because it suited his game. It's because he wants, something he _thinks_ that I have" she shakes her head, closing her eyes at the thoughts of this whole mess. Wondering about getting JC back.

Mandy hesitates "Is this to do with the _shopping list_ file?"

C.J stops drinking. Sitting up she stares at Mandy's reflection of the bar mirror "He told you?" she's taken a back "Jason... Jason told you about the file?"

"Yes. He said he couldn't open it, and he asked for my help "

"And did you mention it to anyone?" C.J looks at her seriously "Did you open it?" she turns, staring at Mandy.

Mandy hesitates before answering "Well I um...I may have, inadvertently, told Reuben, about the file. But I never told him who had it. Just that I might be able to get it if they released you"

C.J shakes her head and takes a deep breath trying to think. The alcohol's starting to cloud her thinking

 _Shit_! She sighs, looking at the whiskey in the glass, closing her eyes "And _so_ , he then sent Nancy to find it." she nods to herself "He thought he was clever but when she couldn't find it then he took JC as leverage." she sighs realising Mandy's indiscretion is the reason her son was taken "Just go away and leave me alone!"

"Look I need to take you back. I can't leave you here drinking like this "

"I'm not going anywhere. Not with you! I'm gonna sit here and I'm gonna get drunk!"

"C.J, please! Just think what you're doing," Mandy doesn't know what to do to make her stop and she pulls at her arm

"Get the _fuck_ off me!" She's angry, shoving her back. It scares Mandy, the anger, the way she's behaving. The only thing she can think is to leave and go and get Jason. "Look If you know where he is we can get him back, we get Jason, the team, and we get him back!"

 _Shit!_ C.J rubs her face she can't think straight "Just go!... Just go and leave me alone. I will be fine" she sighs "I just need to be on my own for a while"

Mandy concedes. She shakes her head in frustration and reluctantly leaves "Fine. Have it your way. Just don't do anything until I get back with Jason"

She gets up and leaves. Looking back, over her shoulder, she sees her ordering another drink _Damn!_

o-o-o-o-o-o

C'J sits staring at herself in the mirror behind the back bar. She closes her eyes. _What a mess! How the hell am I going to sort this_? She sighs.

With Mandy, finally gone. she pulls the small black flash drive out of her pocket and rolls it around in her hand. _Why didn't I just give it to him like I intended?_ She sighs.

She closes her eyes again. She feels sick looking at it. _The damage this thing has caused and the damage it could still cause. How many more people need to die for this piece of shit!_

She just wants to destroy right here, but she knows what that would mean she might never see JC again and so she puts it back in her pocket and continues with her drink. She's thinking. Turns the glass around in her hand, looking at the amber colored liquid, then closing her eyes she knocks what's left in the glass back in one go. "I'll have another!"

"You sure you need anymore?" For the first time the barman frowns at her "You've had quite a few now."

"Just pour the, damn, drink!" She lays her head on her folded arms, on the bar, and closes her tear-filled eyes.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Mandy gets back to base and rushes to the office "Where's Jason?" she anxiously asks Davis "I've been trying to get him on the phone with no reply"

"They're on a mock-up exercise, this afternoon" Davis frowns, worried "I can send a message via Commander Blackburn, if it's important?"

 _Shit!_

"Mandy, is there something wrong?"

"Yes! Yes, leave him a message. Tell him to call me, urgently! The minute he can"

Davis wonders what urgency but doesn't ask "Will do! You know, they weren't able to find anything at Clay's apartment. Everything of Nancy's was gone"

"Right" She frowns "I'll be in my office, please come and get me if he gets back."

She walks down the corridor, unsure if she should go back, to the restaurant. She tries calling Reuben again, but it's still going straight to voicemail.

o-o-o-o-o-o

Reuben uses the alias _Robin Thomas,_ one of many, when he's staying away and as he crosses the lobby, on his way back to his room, the hotels Duty Manager calls to him "Mr _Thomas,_ could I have a word?"

"Certainly" Reuben's cautious in his reply "Is there a problem?"

"Sir, it's your _guest!_ " he coughs "Your guest, that's in the bar. She.. well you need to see" he points to the bar entrance

"My _guest_?" he frowns showing concern "What guest?"

"Your _lady_ guest" he gives an embarrassed cough " the one in the bar. Sir she..." He points

Reuben's puzzled as he cautiously goes along with the manager. He immediately sees CJ. She's laid her head in her arms on the bar. She hasn't moved for quite some time. Sitting there in a drunken half sleep

" I'm sorry Sir, but we had to stop serving her. I hope you understand?"

Reuben laughs. A huge smile on his face "Yes sure, that's perfectly understandable given the circumstance. Thank You! I'll deal with her. She's um... she's had some bad news today. So, I apologise on her behalf"

" Oh, that's fine, Sir. As one of our regulars we overlooked the indiscretion"

He smiles and gives the manager a $100 tip "I appreciate you taking care of her" he pats him on the shoulder "And I trust we can keep this to ourselves"

"No problem Sir. If you need a anything, then please let us know"

"No, it's fine. I can manage her by myself, thank you!" he heads to the bar and pulls up a stool next to her and orders "JD on the rocks please" He smiles watching her sleep "Well Catherine, you do surprise me. What are you still doing here?" He rubs his finger gently on her neck "actually don't answer that, I can see"

She looks up and sighs "Reuben?" she looks around to get her bearings, she rubs her head "um…" she looks at the nearly empty glass in front of her and drains whats left "we need to talk" she slurs

He smiles as he takes a sip of his JD. He's watching her smiling and thinking,

She rubs her head and hands through her hair trying to get herself together as he rubs her cheek with the back of his hand, his thumb along the line of her lip "What are we to do with you Catherine? Perhaps, some coffee and sober you up first" he smiles "then we can talk"

"Coffee, Sir?" the barman asks

"No… it's okay... I'll take her to my room and order some there. Thank You" "She's had a fair few. If you require anything just ask"

Reuben smiles. "Yes, I can see that she has" He drinks the rest of his drink while looking her all over "Come on Catherine let's get you up... Can you stand?"

she sighs as he helps her up putting his arm round her waist. "Reuben….." she looks up staring him in the face

"S _hhh..._ I know" he smiles "Don't worry, everything is going to be alright...I promise!"


	31. Chapter 31

**Chapter 32: It'll all be over soon.**

As they approach the end of the corridor to his suite, Reuben un-loops her arms from around his neck and holding her drunken body against the wall as he unlocks the door. Once inside he throws her down onto the bed, standing over her he smiles.

She rubs her head. Slouched against the headboard she pulls her hands through her hair, desperately trying to sober up. He squats down next to her at the side of the bed, lifting her chin to look her in the face "Are you okay?" He smiles "Do you know where you are?"

She nods but doesn't speak as he strokes his hand on her face "Good"

She pushes his hand away, rubbing her face before her head collapses into her hands and she lets out a long resigned sigh then looks up at him pitifully

"Oh dear Catherine.." he frowns watching her "..what a mess you are" He rubs at her cheek again, his thumb working its way over her lips. She responds to his touch, nuzzling her cheek into his gentle touch on her face. It's the comfort she craves and closing her eyes she's trying to block out the situation. He massages his hand slowly over her neck, moving it further down until he's groping at her breast. She just lets him. That drunk, and sad, she doesn't have the energy to resist. He smiles again.

As he gets up from the side of the bed he turn to the tray of drinks on the cabinet and pours himself one, his gaze still fixed on her sitting there. She's trying so hard to pull herself together, but the drink has consumed her.

He puts his drink down on the side table and he watches her as she looks up at him, trying to focus her eyes as he leans forward and kisses her. Pushing her to lying back on the bed he moves his kiss from her lips down her neck and to the small V in her clothing exposing her chest. Then he unzips her jacket and pulling at the material to the shirt he exposes the flesh of her breast and places his lips to it, kissing and sucking at the softness. She anxiously swallows and a lone tear runs down her cheek as she holds her nerve and lets him continue.

He can feel her apprehensive as focuses his gaze back on her eyes. Gently wiping the tear from her cheek "Shhh! Catherine, it's going to be alright" he comforts her, kissing her lips, moving down her body, his hand in a soft grip on her neck. His touches are gentle as he continues to caress her body. Her breathing in deeply trying to hold back the rest of her tears.

Now as he smiles he kisses her fully on the lips, parting them as he forces his tongue wantonly into her mouth. Now she tries to resist she doesn't want this intimacy with him. Him touching her body she can switch off, shutdown but this kissing is much too emotional. But the drink has stolen all of her strength and she just lays there unable to resist, giving in to his kisses.

As he pauses looking at her, stroking her hair back from her face she holds him away from her body, staring him in the eyes "I just want him back" she pleads sucking the tears into her throat "Reuben I want my son back"

"I know" he smiles looking her deep in the eyes "I know... soon. Now quiet" he starts kissing her harder, more forcefully now. She can't focus and closes her eyes. Concentrating only on the thoughts of getting her child back she relaxes her body, accepting what's going to happen and allows him to carry on. He smiles, brushing her hair from around her face as he looks at her "All you have to do, is give me what I want, and all this can be over" She sighs, nodding as he buries his face against her breast again. She closes her eyes tight, shutting her mind off.

He stands up. Taking his tie off he then unbuttons his shirt. Standing over her in just his pants he unbuttons her jeans pulling them down to take them off for her. Then laid there in only a white vest top and lace panties, he starts kissing across the soft flesh of her stomach. She takes a deep breath as he undoes his pants dropping them to the floor. As he does he notices something on the floor next to where he dropped her clothing.

 _Well, well!_ he smiles to himself, picking it up, looking at in his hand. It's the flash drive she had in her pocket and he smiles as he drops it into the outer pocket of his jacket which is hanging on the back of the chair beside him "Shhh" he soothe the tears he can see leaking from the corner of her eye "Relax Catherine, it will all soon be over." He smiles, looking her in the eyes while stroking his hand up the inside of her thigh "I've missed you. Your body" he sighs " We always did have good time together."

Giving into the situation she wants it over and puts her hand on the back of his head, pulling him towards her to kiss. He grabs as the white material of her shirt and tugs it up over her head. Leaving her only wearing her panties as she lays in front of him.

"Take them off!" he demands. She hesitates for a moment, she feels humiliated by him knowing he's controlling this, but she focus on what she came for, her son and closing her eyes she slides the black lace down her legs before resuming position on the bed, staring him in the eyes. Though it's not like this hasn't happened before, on many occasions. There's still a reluctance as she surrenders to him. The feeling that there is no option left but to go through with it she allowing his hands onto her body

"Just relax" He turns her over onto her chest and she takes a deep breath as he pulls at her hips, forcing his body against her as she buries her face into the bed covers and closes her eyes "Tell me you want this he whispers as his hands stroke along her back over her ass under her stomach and up to her breast where he grabs at her "Tell me you want me again, that you missed this. Say it!"

She takes another deep breath Pheww "Yes!" She closes her eyes tight shut trying to stay relaxed "Yes I this, I want you" there was a time, once when yes she would have enjoyed this, with him but now all she's hoping is that this will soon be over. Mmmm she groans as she submits to hm and d as he thrusts against her and as she hears the grunting sounds of pleasure from him a tear rolls down her cheek.

Then it's over and sprawled naked on her chest she drifts into a drunken sleep. He smiles looking at her as he drinks the drink that he poured earlier. He turns around picking his cell phone up and hits the _stop recording_ button. A huge grin on his face as he plays as section of the recording back. He strokes the back over his hand against the soft curve of her butt. She's so tempting that he wants to do it again with her but virtually unconscious now and he watches her sleep and looking at his watch "Sorry no time Catherine!"

He takes a shower and dresses. Packs up his belongings into his case and gets ready to leave. Kissing her gently cheek before he does. She stirs only slightly then falls back to sleep. He holds the flash drive in his fingers, smiling as he takes one last look back at her laying there on the bed "Such a shame it had to end like this. You really were quite unique"

He closes the door to the suite behind him as he walks out.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Mandy's been waiting for Jason to come back from the training exercise. Desperate to tell him what's happened. He doesn't take it well and is fuming with her "I can't believe you left her!...For god sake Mandy! I've told you how stupid she gets when she's been drinking. Who knows what she'll do now!"

"I'm sorry. I am. I just didn't know what to do" she gulps chasing behind him trying to apologize. Jason walks quickly and she's trying desperately to keep up as they leave the base and get to his truck. He's still in his uniform on and strips off his top and changes into a tee shirt that's in a pile on the back seat. Mandy watching him, ashamedly looking at his body as he pulls it over his head

"What?"

"No nothing!" she shakes her head. After what CJ said she feels really guilty about looking at him

"Shit!" he bangs his hand, hard on the steering wheel "I can't believe it. You know, I've kept her away from the drink for three weeks and now in one afternoon!" he sighs "God knows what we'll find when we get there"

"She was in a public bar when I left, so I can't imagine too much can go wrong" Mandy tries to make it sound better. Though she doesn't actually believe that and neither does Jason, he knows C.J too well and he just glares at Mandy

o-o-o-o-o-o

They get back to the hotel, there's no sign of CJ in the bar _SHIT!... Shit!_ Jason spins around looking for her "Where is she?"

They speak to the barman, but there's been a change of shifts since earlier and this new guy hasn't seen her. They try at the reception desk. The manager comes over "Can I help?"

"There was a woman…"Mandy smiles at him "A friend of ours, I left her in the bar earlier, she was drinking by herself. Tall, long brown hair in ponytail Do you know where she went?"

"No! Though I do remember that we had to stop serving her at one point and so, I think, she left"

"Do you know where she went?"

"No sorry! I can't help any more than that"

 _SHIT!_ Jason rubs his head "She could be anywhere now!" he tries to think "What did she say to you and why the hell was she even here? Mandy what happened?"

Mandy takes a deep breath and then starts to explain.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

 _Mmmm!_ "Oh god!" CJ groans as she awakes from her drunken slumber. She feels terrible, her body aching all over, head throbbing and opening her eyes just makes it all seem much worse.

Eventually coherent enough to remember where she is and what went on "Reuben" she calls out. She gets no answer and grabbing at the cotton sheet she pulls I around her naked body to cover herself. Oh shit! She moans again, leaning back against headboard. Rubbing the drunkenness of last night from her face. She gets up off of the bed and heads towards the bathroom. Running some cool water into the sink she washes her face. It helps, but not a lot and looking at her reflection in the mirror she sighs _Shit! I do not feel good!_

Then taking a moment and focusing she frowns, noticing that there is nothing in the room. No toiletries not aftershave. Nothing belonging to Reuben is here. Confused she walks back int the bedroom. Again, there is nothing. And she checks the closet. His clothes are gone. "Reuben!" She calls again, knowing realistically she's not going to get an answer _He's gone!_

She slumps on the bed. Her head drops into her hand and she starts to feel sorry for herself _SHIT!_... _I need to get dressed. I need to get out of here!...How the fuck could I let this happen!_

Picking up her jeans from the floor a foreboding makes her urgently check the pockets for the flash drive. Panicked she frantically searches the floor, under the bed the tabletops, desperate to find it _It's not there! "_ It's gone!" _Shit!_ "He's taken it!" she slumps down on the floor. Her head in her hands. Pulling at her hair in frustration of her own hE She actually feels physically sick. "Oh god! How the hell could I be so stupid" She cries, sobbing into her knees "Now what the hell am I going to do?"

First she showers, trying to erase the images of last night, if not from her mind then from her body. Scrubbing the scent of Reubens aftershave from her skin. She used to love the smell of him but now it just makes her want to retch. Gathering her clothes from the floor she gets dressed. Then gathering her thoughts, she sits on the bed raking her fingers through her wet hair.

She frowns, looking up. There on the dresser in front of her she can see a large brown envelope. Her name written in large letters on the front. She picks it up and sits back on the bed again emptying the contents out beside her _._

 _Huh!_

She gasps at the contents. Firstly, a gun. She takes picks it up, looking it over and then she frowns leafing through the two fake passports also contained in the envelope. Her and Jaycee photographs, just not their details there is also an envelope of cash around five thousand dollars she would guess. And there also there, confusing her a white plastic hotel key card. The number 202 etched on it. She stares at it thinking wondering why it's there.

"Oh my God!" Her breathing increasing rapidly, quickly she gets her shoes. Gathers the gun, cash and passports stuffing them frantically back into the brown envelope. She shoves it in the waist band of her jeans, covering I over with her shirt..

She's breathing hard, she feels an apprehensive panic as she runs quickly down the stairs to the second floor. Counting she goes along the room doors. _208.. 206… 204_ …. "202!" She stands outside it staring at the number. "Oh god" she takes a deep breath as she opens the door with the key card. Instinct takes over and she take the gun from the waist of her jeans and cracks the door open just slightly.

Its dark inside except for a small side light. But there in front of her is a baby's crib and JCs asleep inside it . "Thank god!" she smiles seeing the small child lying there for a moment there is a panic until he opens his eyes to her. "Hey baby she smiles. Checking the room, it seems empty him here by himself. "Oh, thank god!" She smiles, kissing his cheek as she picks him up.

Holding him she looks around the room. The TV is on, but there's no one here. The room is smaller than Reuben's suite and the bathroom door is shut. "Hey baby _Shhh!_ " She places him back in the crib "Mommy's here" she whispers to JC.

She nervously she puts her hand to the bathroom door, holding the gun out in front of her as she pushes it open "Oh shit!" she stops where she is. Her blood runs cold and she turns away from the sight of Nancy. Dead on the floor. A single gunshot to the head. _Oh hell!_ She staggers backwards her hand over her mouth to stifle any sounds _Shit!... Shit!_

She takes a minute, looking at the gun in her hand. The gun Reuben left her, with the envelope "Oh no! No, no! Oh …" it dawns on her. He's set her up.

She rubs her head "Think Catherine... think" She's hot and feels sick. Then as her phone pings. A withheld number. A notification for a video message. She frowns nervously she opens the file and presses play on her screen

Oh god! she feels physically sick. Retching the contents of her stomach into her throat as the sexually explicit video lights up her screen. She closes her eyes and shakes her head. Tears run down her cheek "You asshole!" she screams. The images of her and Reuben together reminding her of last night. Of what she did. She sits on the bed sobbing  
into her hand "You .. fuckin son of bitch" she puts her hand over her mouth. Trying desperately to think.

She takes a deep breath, picking JC up from the crib into her arms "Okay, come on baby. We need to go" She doesn't know where yet, but she knows that they can't stay here.

She carries him down in the lift to the hotel lobby. As they get to the bottom and the lift doors open. She can see Jason, with Mandy standing there in the reception _Oh dammit! This is just getting worse!_

"Hey! What the hell's going on!" he calls out to her as he sees her standing there.

"Jason…."She shakes her head "You have to let me go. I didn't do this!" she pleads "He's set me up. You have to believe me. I just wanted to get my son back. I had to do it. "

"Do what?" Jason's confused as the ranting nonsense she's coming out with

She wants to explain but spotting the hotel housekeeper speaking to the security guards, them then running up the stairs She knows she doesn't have time. They'll be finding Nancy's body soon "I didn't do any of it . But you have to let me go... PLEASE!" she begs "Jason or Jaycees' sake let me go!"

They both turn, looking at the hotel manager, he's on the telephone reporting the incident upstairs to the police. She looks at Jason "I didn't do it!" Watching him frown confused "You have to trust me. Nancy. I didn't do it. I didn't kill her. Jason please… _YOU_ have to believe me"

He looks at her. He's not sure what's going on and he shakes his head "Give me my son!"

"No!" She's looking at him staring at him hard, willing him to believe her "Tell me you believe me that I didn't do it?" she's trying to get a read on his reaction, but he just puts his hands out reaching for JC. She snatches him away "NO!"

"Okay, I believe you but give me my son and we'll fix this. I promise. We will, but you need to give me the baby. You can't take him" he still has his arms out and she continues to shake her head

"I can't! You have to let us go"

"You… yes! But I can't let you take my son. I'm sorry"

She gulps what he says cuts her in two. She bites her lip thinking " I'm sorry… I'm _so_ sorry" she shakes her head "He's not yours! He's not your son."

He looks at her. Studying her face, the expression wondering if she's telling the truth "You're lying. I know you you're lying. You're lying so I'll let you go. "

She gulps and shakes her head. Her heart is breaking and she trying desperately to hold back her crying. trying to be strong and focus on getting away from here. "No, it's the truth! He's not yours"

"No, no this is a lie! " he looks her in the eyes "Don't do this C.J Just let me help you but don't take my son!"

"Jason... if you love me, then you have to let me go right now. Because if they lock me up, I can't fix this. So please just let me go"

The police are arriving. They watch them running up the stairs "Jason… please you have to" she pleads with him "Please"

He just stares at her, trying to work out if she really is lying or if there is some truth that he doesn't want to hear "Don't do this" he says but now he steps aside. He gives her the chance to walk away, hoping she won't take it "Doesn't have to be like this. Just give me my son"

"Jason…" She gulps closing her eyes "I am so sorry. But you have to trust me it's the only way to keep him safe. Jason, I need to find out what's going on and then I will make this right" it takes all of her will power to hold back her tears as she walks away, carrying JC

Jason looks at the ceiling to hold back his tears. He thinks about stopping her, he has no idea whats gone on but seeing the police he panics. What if she's right? And so, then gritting his teeth he has to trust her and trying desperately to hold his emotions together unexplainably lets walk away. "I don't know what's happened but she's lying! He is my son."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

 **Two weeks later**

Clay answers the knock at the door "Hey, can I help?" he frowns unsure of the two people in the hallway until they flash their badges in front of him.

" Mr Spenser, Clay Spenser? We're investigating the Nancy Travis murder We have a few questions for you."

"Oh um.. yeah sure! Yeah...please, come in" He gestures them inside the apartment "I don't understand, I've already given a statement. I don't think there's anything more I can tell you"

"Yes we know. But.. you were dating her, Ms Travis, right?"

"Yeah kind of... for a short while"

"Well um…this envelope was found her possession. In her purse. It is addressed to you"

"Um…I'm not sure what it is?" Clay looks confused but he notices its registered "She must have signed for it and put it in her purse. I've never seen it before"

Then as he studies the envelope he realises what it might be "Oh.. " he closes his eyes

"Would it be okay if we asked you to show us the contents? In case it would be any use to our investigation?"

"No! It's um… it's not. I mean I know what it is now. It's um.. some medical test results of mine?"

"Okay!" The Detective nods "Well we'll leave it with you. If you have any further information that may aid our investigation then please get in touch"

Clays' confused that they leave it so easily that they don't demand further information. The female Detective smiles at Clay hesitating before she leaves his apartment

"Oh one further thing...We believe you were also engaged in a sexual relationship, with Catherine Lewis. Is this correct?"

"Um… "Clay coughs "yeah. Well it was a while back. Not recently. What does that have to do with anything ?"

the Detective looks at the envelope. " _If_ Ms Lewis was to get in touch for _any_ reason you will contact us and let us know?"

"Um… yeah sure but I can't think that she will. Not with me. She has no reason to."

As he closes the door on them he lets out a big sigh. Looking at the envelope in his hand. He rubs his head "Shit!"

He sits himself quietly on the bed looking at the brown envelope. Then he notices the seal has already been broken. He looks at the door where the Detectives just left and shakes his head and smiles.

He puts his hand on his mouth thinking. Then taking another deep breath he pulls out the white folded paper contained inside and reads it. Closing his eyes and sighs Oh shit!

 ** One ** **week later**

And Clay looks at his phone as he receives a text from a withheld number:

 _Can we meet?_

He frowns before he replies

 _Sure. I know a cheap motel that does beer and pizza eat in?_

.


	32. Chapter 32

**Chapter 32: Mandy don't trust him**

Reuben's furious he pulls the flash drive out of the laptop before slamming the lids shut. _Fuck!_ He looks at the black piece of plastic in his hand, throwing it on the floor he then stamps on it. _Fuck!_ He lets out a long, deep, angry sigh and closes his eyes while he regains his composure

The file that he wants isn't on there. Only some photos. It's been removed. SHIT! "Why the hell didn't I check it first?"

He takes a large gulp of the whiskey in his glass and then he types, quickly and angrily, on the text:

 _Think you were being clever. I'm coming after you for it. My patience with you has run out now!_

"Damn it!" He didn't check because everything was rushed that day with her presenting an opportunity, by being drunk, that he'd not planned for.

Checking his phone, he knows she's not going to reply, and he sucks his teeth thinking. Flicking through the contacts list, he hits call "Yeah it's me….. "he pauses "I need someone found. Whatever it takes. Urgently. I'll send you the details"

He sighs to himself. Lost deep in his thoughts, he runs his hand through his floppy fringe and leans back in his office chair, putting his feet up on the desk.

He's more relaxed now and flicks the video files on his phone. Stopping at one tagged _'Ellis'_ he hits the play button. The video filling the screen and he turns it sideways so its larger  
 _Mmmm!_ He groans as he watches, smiling. "Oh Ms Ellis... You're such a good agent. Just a tad naïve. Still you'll be useful none the less" he laughs "Mexico was certainly enjoyable"

He hits stop and flicking the contacts again he stops at E. _Ms Ellis._ He now hits call "Mandy! Hello, would it be possible for us to meet up again?"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Mandy walks around the park. She sighs checking the time on her watch "What the hell am I doing here? This feels so wrong" she thinks long and hard about why she agreed to meet him. She hadn't even told anyone, which she decides now was probably stupid. "Perhaps I should go?" She questions and just as she decides to turn back, turning around she bumps smack into a man in a suit.

"Oh my god… I'm so sorry! Please excuse me" as she looks up "Oh…" She gasps "Reuben!?" Suddenly seeing him a blood rushing panic comes over her and she really does wonder why she came here.

"Ms Ellis.." he smiles "..Mandy. For you.." he hands her the large bouquet of flowers "By way of an apology, for our spoiled lunch, the other day."

She looks at him, trying to work out his body language. He's just smiling, a wide grin on his face as he hands her the flowers. It's as if nothing has happened, in the restaurant, with CJ. And despite the warning and a chill that his presence brings the way he talks, is crystal cut English accent, it really does something to her insides. It makes her tingle.

She closes her eyes and accepts the bouquet, but she can't let him win her over this easily there's too much explaining to do. "So... what do you want Reuben?" her tone remains aggressive as she wants to stay in control. She's quivering inside but she keeps her voice strong and stern. She thinks it's gives her an air of her authority over the situation. Her head replaying the warnings that CJ gave her about him.

"Oh…why so gruff, Ms Ellis? This is not your normal welcome" he tilts his head and smiles

She sighs, she's going to act tough, not be walked over. She isn't beneath him as C.J said "Yeah well that was before you set someone up for murder, and did whatever else you did to her"

"Sorry?" He frowns, screwing up his forehead in confusion "Where has this come from? Me…murder?! I don't understand" he stares at her with a puzzled expression

"C.J…she told Jason that's what you did to her."

"C.J?" he frowns "Oh... Catherine. What has that woman been saying now?" Reuben can never get used to the Americans calling her CJ. The woman he knows is Catherine. She's much more dominant than this abbreviated version they seem to know. "So?... What has the drunk been telling you?" He laughs "Oh let me guess.. she told Hayes some story about me taking advantage, me being the one to blame just because she now feels guilty. Because in her drunken state she slept with me? Is that why?" He smiles shaking his head "She wants to blame me because she went behind Hayes back.

He watches as Mandy stands staring at him. She frowns not sure now what to believe "Mandy…" he sighs "don't forget, Catherine can be very manipulative, especially where he's concerned! Personally, I don't know why he would believe anything she says especially without questioning it. " He takes a long sigh looking at the time on his watch "Mandy you know as well as I do that she was a drunken mess. As she is most of the time. She lives in a messed-up fantasy world. So, then ask yourself what reason would I have to set her up for murder? I mean if you remember I helped you to get her back!"

Hmmm! Mandy frowns this has been playing on her mind too. Why would he help to get her back from Damascus to set her up? He may as well have left her there "Yeah okay… I'll agree she was quite messed up the other day but… I don't know what's going on"

"You know I have to admit that .. um … well, perhaps I should shoulder some of the blame" he looks down sighing "I mean I have to admit in a moment of weakness I did probably take advantage of her drunken state. I know her and I should have known better but …" he shrugs "It's not like we haven't do it before and I'm human, she's a very attractive woman and offering herself … well I should have known better! But I guess if I'm honest. I wanted her"

wanted it" he stares at Mandy "You have to understand we had history and... I suppose in

He smiles an apologetic smile at Mandy face crumples, her feelings hurt.

"Oh c'mon Mandy, I'm sure your sure your friend Mr Hayes will attest to her attributes?" he laughs giving her a questioning look "As for this pure fantasy of setting her up for murder" he frowns "Personally I think she needs some professional help again" he pauses "I don't know if you ever knew but her father put her in a facility for drinking and medication addiction. She suffered quite badly. She was a danger to herself. I think she could be on that spiral again She probably needs out help"

He pauses letting Mandy digest what he's telling her "However, for all that I um…I could get everything cleared up. I mean with the police, there's been a misunderstanding... _if_ I was given the chance to speak with her.. then I'm sure I can sort everything out."

"How?" Mandy frowns "How can you sort it? From what I understood it was simple she had entered the room, shot Nancy and taken her son back. Its case closed with the police. They certainly aren't looking for other explanations."

"Well if someone came forward, …say a witness who saw differently. I have to say I managed to get a copy of the police report and I took the liberty to review the case file...There is a witness who says he saw a man leaving the room earlier. They were in in an adjacent room and heard a disturbance going on they thought it was the TV but obviously turns out it wasn't"

"What? The police never mentioned a witness" Mandy has her doubts about his story to begin with, but now something starts to sound credible "So what you're saying that she didn't kill her? So, you mean … that would mean she could come back. Jason could get his son back"

"Well for what it's worth, I don't believe she did it" He shakes his head "but that's not what the police believe. I have people looking to trace the man seen at the room. The witness is willing to come forward so I'm sure it could all be cleared up" he smiles he can see Mandy is coming around "We just need to find Catherine, before the police do"

They're still walking along the park. There's a coffee stop. "Would you like a coffee?" he smiles

Hesitant she agrees "Sure" she nods and smiles "But … just a coffee!"

"Oh… of course"  
He smiles, giving her one of his attractive grins. She sighs there's just something about him makes her feel like a schoolgirl again. He puts his hand gently on her back "After you Ms Ellis"

They take a seat at the table "Two white coffee's please" he orders and smiles at the server who comes to their table. She smiles, grinning at the sound of his accent.

Mandy closes her eyes smiling as she watches him flirt with the waitress "Do you have that effect on everyone?"

He smiles "Do You know what I've thinking about? About us, and Mexico" He smiles, rubbing his fingers on the back of her hand "Before I left this morning and what an interesting time that was" he sighs "Maybe we should do it again?"

He's also now thinking of the video on his phone. The one of Mandy naked and he smiles. Thinking how unlike Catherine, Mandy needed coaxing to be more adventurous. Not that she didn't enjoy it but that was the difference between them. Catherine had a lust for sex for taking risks, trying new things. She enjoyed it, she wanted it and she didn't require the effort that it took to get Mandy to try something different.

"Reuben I don't think it's a good idea given the circumstances. Do you?"

"Well I guess…then I'll just have to keep my memories for now" He smiles. "It's a shame. I really like you Mandy. I thought we were good together" he takes her hand and softly strokes it "I haven't felt that way about a woman in a long time"

She smiles and licks her lips He's just so tempting. She coughs and pulls her hand away as the coffees arrive. Nervously looking down.

"How about dinner? Tonight, my treat. To say sorry for everything"

"Maybe" she sighs "I'll think about it" she smiles now she'd doubting herself regarding his intentions

He leans back in his seat comfortable now. That "maybe" means "yes" and that means he has her hooked back where he needs her "Anywhere. You name it, it can be your choice" he smiles

"I said maybe, Reuben. "

"Of course,…maybe!"

He stirs his coffee looking at her. She keeps glancing up at him smiling. She bites her lip. She feels foolish, but she does really like him and maybe C.J did get it all wrong. Mandy admits to herself what a bad place she was in. The drinking, and that maybe she did have a huge problem. Maybe it would be best to help her, for Jason and the baby's sake but she decides she will speak to Jason first.

"So… Mandy, have you heard from Catherine?"

Mandy shakes her head "No! Though to be fair I'm not sure she would want to speak to me."

"What about Mr Hayes surely he's been trying to contact her. I mean, because of the child?" he waits to see what she replies "She can't have gone very far not in three weeks, especially with a baby and the police looking for her. Mr Hayes must know something ?"

"NO! I don't think Jason's heard from her" she drinks her coffee "I'm not sure he wants to speak to her either considering. Though you're right he's desperate to see his son" Mandy holds her coffee cup "But … then part of me thinks that maybe…maybe it's for the best in the long run that he doesn't get too attached, to the child"

"Best?" he frowns "Best for who? Surely a child needs it's father? I mean, a willing father is hard to find and from what I understand he seemed to cope very well with the child, while she was away. Surely you want him to see his child, wouldn't you?" he needs to convince her that contacting Catherine is the best course of action "For everyone's sake. Why wouldn't you want this?"

He plays on the soft spot he knows she has for Jason. Even if it's something he was slightly jealous of. The attraction both women seemed to have for Hayes. He doesn't understand it .  
The way he sees it, Hayes was more like a stone age throwback. No sophistication to him, unlike himself. All beer and Hockey but no mental stimulation. No, he didn't ever get Catherine's infatuation with him. Catherine liked to be stimulated, she liked a challenge he couldn't see how Hayes did that for her and yet here was Mandy, acting exactly the same way over him. It fascinates Reuben.

"I suppose I don't know"

"What? Something bothering you about this situation?"

 _Ummm!_ She sighs, looking around hesitating with her thoughts "It's just that … well I've never been totally convinced that .." she pauses again. "..that the baby was his! Not one hundred percent! With everything that went on before, well it was a mess. I wanted him to do a test, just to be sure. But…" she shrugs "he won't. He takes her word for it"

This new revelation interests Reuben "Really?" he frowns "But I thought they were solid. I mean she never use to stop talking about him, even when it was all over between them. His name always came up somewhere" he frowns "So what makes you think the child might not be his?"

"She hurt him… a lot" Mandy's soft spot for Jason as well as her dislike of CJ is now evident Mandy thinking him a fool for falling for her again this time. And yes this is Mandy showing her weakness for Jason "She told him, herself when she left, that the baby wasn't his" she pauses thinking if she's right to tell him this "Jason, thinks she lied just to get away but ...but I'm not so sure"

She sips her coffee, staring at him over the table taking her time "Me, personally …I think that maybe, she took it as her chance to tell the truth before she left"

"Really?!" Reuben's shocked "So if the child isn't his…then who's do you think it is?"

"What you worried?" Mandy smiles "That it might be yours?"

"No!" He laughs "No.. no, we are a long time ago in the past. Much too long for anything like that" he smiles "It's definitely not mine but seriously… is there someone else in the picture?"

"Why are you so curious?" his questioning is making her suspicious now

"Just curiosity ...just keeping tabs on her for personal reasons. You know, I do actually care about what happens to her" he smiles "I mean, I just assumed it was Jason's but… your information.. well, I didn't know there was anyone else in her life"

He smiles he can see he needs to tread carefully with his questioning now as he Mandy is starting to call into question his motives. She puts her cup down and leans forward. She feels like she's giving him the office gossip now "Well if I was placing bets on who's it might be I would say … Clay, Clay Spenser!"

"Spenser? I'm not sure that name rings a bell?" he frowns thinking "Oh…oh really! You mean Ash Spenser's son? The SEAL that wrote the book?" he frowns more "Is he not a little young for her?" he smiles. "Not that there anything wrong with a little age difference now and again" he smiles thinking about some of the officer secretaries he's had sex with.

"Well um… "She bites her cheek but continues " Her and him they had a bit of a thing for a while." She picks the cup up and drinks the rest of her coffee. She sighs and frowns "Then her infatuation with Jason took hold. I mean, she never would let him go would she!" Reuben sits contemplating things and Mandy wonders if she's said too much. "Not that its really any of my business"

"Look Mandy do you want to help your friend, or not? I mean he's the one hurting here" he puts his hand back on her hand "You have the chance to get his son back in his life or…. prove that he wasn't his son. Put the record straight one way or the other "

"I'm not sure Reuben" she shakes her head "I mean this all seems a big mess and if she doesn't want to be found?"

He sighs frustrated at how hard it is convincing her to give Catherine's location up. He needs to get her onside "Oh but she can be found. Look…" He smiles "isn't that what we do? Our agencies .. we find people. We rescue people who need help. Mandy, I feel like I need to win back your trust. Tell me what I need to do?"

She looks confused "I don't understand. I do trust you"

"No… no I mean obviously what Catherine said has put me in some bad light with you so … let me fix that"

"I don't know… Reuben, it's not that, it's…"

"But it is. So, tell me how to fix it and Ill prove to you that you can trust one hundred percent!"

Mandy looks at her watch and sighs she's not sure how to answer him "Look I need to go"

He grabs her hand "Dinner then?.. _PLEASE!?"_

She smiles and bites her lip thinking "I'll let you know" she smiles. She's trying not to sound keen, even if she is. She gets up, kissing his cheek before she leaves.

.

He finishes his coffee and sits back in the chair relaxed now it's all gone so well. He flicks through the videos on his phone and stops at the one marked _'Catherine 4 '_ Then enjoying as the images on the screen, smiling to himself as he enjoys what he's watching. "Another coffee please" she smiles at the waitress. He checks his watch giving it fifteen minutes and then he turns off the video and text Mandy

 _I enjoyed today. Thank you. Don't forget Dinner X_

Mandy smiles as she looks at the text on her phone. " _God, he's persistent"._ She smiles

o-o-o-o-o-o

Reuben's still sitting at the coffee stop table. He flicks his phone contacts open and hits the call button "Yes it's me. I need _all_ the information you have on a SEAL operative Tier one DEVGRU. Spenser. Clay Spenser. Yes, it's a priority".

.


	33. Chapter 33

**Chapter 34: Just tell him**

Cautiously Clay knocks on the motel door. It opens very slightly "You on your own?"

"Yeah" He checks behind him "I was when I checked."

"And no one followed you"

"No…" He frowns "not that I know of. Do you want me to come in?"

"Yeah…yeah sure. Sorry I'm not thinking. Lack of sleep" she smiles. "I'm taking a huge risk asking you here!"

"You okay?" he frowns worried. "Have you actually had any sleep? Sorry but you look like shit"

She hadn't taken much notice before, but now she checks herself in the mirror "Yeah…you might be right!" she laughs. Her lip trembles and tears start to drop down her face "God, I am so tired!" she wipes her face with her hand. The relief of Clay's face and she loses the grip she had on her emotions _Shit!_ She screws up her face and closes her eyes _I can't be like this. I need to keep it together!_

"Hey, c'mon this is not you" he's really worried as he puts his hand gently on her shoulder trying to reassure her.

She nods "Yeah I know!" She's desperately trying to hold herself together but she's so on edge having not slept properly in days and now she can't stop shaking.

"CJ…" he frowns "I'm really worried about you. Where have you been staying?"

"Clay…"she shakes her head "it's better if you don't know that" she wipes the tears off her face with the back of her hand

JC starts to cry. He's been asleep, on a small nest she made on the floor, with the pillows from the bed.

"Hey little man!" Clay smiles "Can I pick him up?"

"Yeah…"She nods "yeah of course. You don't have to ask. Look, I was gonna take a shower. Do you mind? Would you be okay to watch him?"

"Yeah sure. Yeah, take as long as you like. You look like you could do with some time to yourself."

She stands in the doorway of the small bathroom, watching Clay sitting on the bed. JC next to him babbling away in baby speak. It makes her smile and for just a moment in she wishes it could be different. That life could be this. The three of them. _Pheww!_ Back to reality. _Shower and then I need to talk to Clay_

He hears the water running in the shower. "Hey why don't we go get Mommy some food? I'll be she hasn't been eating" He smiles, and JC smiles back "Jut no flirting with any girls this time" He picks him up, holding tight against his chest. Then he picks up the keys from the small side table by the door. "Be back soon, we're just getting some food for you!" He calls out, not actually sure if she's heard him.

CJ steps out of the shower _Mmmm! That felt great!._ _A shower in peace and quiet_. Actually, she listens it is quiet. Too quiet. She opens the bathroom door to find the room empty. No Clay and no JC. She starts to panic. Had she done the right thing trusting Clay or had his loyalty to BRAVO, to Jason won out and he taken her child?

 _"Clay!"_ she calls out knowing he's not going to answer. "Oh my god!" She sits on the bed rubbing her head, unsure what do to do next.

Wondering if he'll come back. She hears a noise outside the door, and she takes her gun from the drawer where she stashed it.

Its Clay. He pushes the door open. His hands full, juggling carrying JC, with two takeout coffees and bags of burgers and fries.

 _Shit!_ He looks up seeing her standing with the gun cocked. "Hey..oh my god! Hey relax! It's only me!" watching her standing there he now realised exactly how tense and worried she really is.

She lets out a sigh and drops her hand _Shit!_ "God I'm sorry!"

"Food!" he smiles. "Thought you might be hungry? Sorry if I worried you" he's concerned. He can see her hands shaking as she lowers the gun. She really is on edge. He's worried, worried she might crack like before.

"Sorry!" she smiles "Food, yeah of course" She sits down on the bed, taking several deep and slow breaths as she holds in her tears. Closing her eyes until she's able to get a grip on her emotions.

JC suddenly starts to cry, and Clay cuddles him tight, comforting him "Hey c'mon lets sort your Mommy some food"

They sit side by side on the bed eating the burgers. I reminds of when they first met, when they'd sit in bed eating pizza.

She feeds some small pieces of the burger bun to JC. Clay also got some small jars of baby food and she's spooning some in. She smiles watching him. How messy he's managing to get. Clay laughs as he watches them "Can I? Can I give him some."?

"Yeah…yeah sure if you want. Just watch yourself he tend to be a messy eater." She sighs. Even despite the desperate situation she's in, she looks at Clay and JC and thinks how nice this is. How normal. "Clay..." she hesitates "Clay, we need to talk" there she finally said it! Finally, she's ready to have the conversation she's been putting off "There's something I need to tell you, about him"

"Yeah…it's okay. I know"

"You know?" she frowns "You know what?"

He takes a deep breath. He actually hates what he's going to say. How many times he wishes it wasn't true "He's not mine is he?"

"No!" She swallows than let's out a big sigh, she's confused though "How… how did you know?

Now it's his turn for confession. "I got a test. A paternity test, I had one done"

"What?!" she looks at him not understanding "When?"

"Oh…a while back"

"Oh my god, so… so you've known all along. But you never said anything?"

"Hey... you have no room to talk!" he frowns "actually I've only recently found out. Oh, somehow the results ended up in…in Nancy's purse. The police have only just given them to me." he pauses for a few minutes "So… did you know, I mean for sure. All this time did you know he was Jason's and that he wasn't mine?"

"Yeah!" She nods, her lip quivers "Yeah I knew. I'm sorry... I mean, I should have told you sooner. I ..I knew you were wondering, and guess Jason was as well" she sigh, sniffing back the tears that fill her eyes. "Just there was part of me… I guess I didn't know what to say and also well… part of me… well I wished he was yours"

"Really?" he frowns "But how could you be so sure? I mean without a test. I mean given the circumstances were pretty messed up" He's a little sad knowing now that JC really isn't his. But he also knows it's probably worked out for the best.

In reality, there would be no way in hell he could bring up a child, alone, and keep his job with DEVGRU. Hell, Jason was struggling and not only had he done it before, albeit with Alana, he also had lots of help. No really as it turned out this was probably the best outcome. Still didn't mean he wasn't bothered by it. If he was honest, he liked the idea of having a child, a family.

She bites her lip and hesitates. Taking a deep breath " I knew because um…. Because I was…Oh shit! Um…I knew I was already pregnant, before that last night in your apartment. I'd already done a test. I was pregnant when I .. when I took those pills. I was so messed up. The idea of having a baby. I was gonna tell Jason that night, then we argued. I just couldn't see it working out" she stares at him "I feel so bad now. Knowing the damage, I could have done. To him.. oh god. But he's perfect"

He shakes his head "My god you knew? You knew and you still did that?" he frowns "I can't believe you still did that. Why the hell didn't you ask for help?"

"I wasn't' thinking that night" her head drops "Like I said, I planned to tell Jason but I couldn't find the moment, then he said we were through." she shakes her head "and then with you that night I was just so happy and I didn't want to spoil it" she shrugs "but then I had to deal with everything. That next morning, I just couldn't cope I couldn't deal with what I'd done. To you.. to Jason… maybe to him. I just wanted out, from this whole nightmare. I wanted it to be over. But now I have to protect him. They'll come for him again. "

" CJ this is fucked up! What the hell are you in to? The baby you lost.. my baby from before did you know then. Did you know you were pregnant before?"

She nods slowly "Yeah.. I suspected. I didn't know for sure. I was gonna have a termination. I hadn't been on ops for ages I didn't wanna miss my chance. I thought I'd deal with it when I got back. But it was too late"

"Jesus Christ.. you just don't think do you. The consequences Shit!

Thanks for being understanding! She closes her eyes "Look, I know I was stupid." She pulls her hands through her hair rubbing her forehead "God why does everything have to be such a mess all the time" she sighs wiping her nose on her hand and the couple of tears escaping her eyes "and now I'm gonna lose him"

"Hey…" Clay frowns " why do you say that? You're not gonna lose him" he sees her hurting "CJ you're not gonna lose him! We'll sort this. I'll speak to Jason, he'll sort this. I promise. But we need to call him"

"No!" She laughs at his optimism, shaking her head "No we don't need to call him. You um… you need you take him. Take him back to Jason" she gets a grip on herself "That's why I asked you here. Why I asked you to come"

"What?"

"He can't stay with me. I can't look after him, right now. Jason needs to protect him until I can sort this. They're gonna come for me, for the thing they think I still have"

"CJ please… let's get Jason here.. we'll come up with a plan" Clay lays JC down in the pillow nest she made for him on the floor to sleep. "What do you have that _they_ want?"

"I really think it's best for you if you don't know that"

"Just tell me" he's stern with her now "I can't help if you don't tell me the truth"

She hesitates thinking. The fact she's invited him here, she trusts him "It's a computer file, of a list. A detailed list of … well of some very high-profile people. The dirty deals they're involved in. But I gave it up to protect us, so they'd let us leave. but now they're gonna come after me again. The file wasn't where I thought it was." She sighs "Oh god….. I think Jason still has it. But needs to keep, keep it safe. It's the only thing that can protect him now"

"CJ I don't understand all this but why did you call me and not Jason?"

"Because they'll be watching Jason. The know the connection. As far as I'm aware no one knows about you and me and...and I trust you"

"Then speak to Jason!" he hesitates and takes a breath "You know he does love you and you know he'll do everything to protect you and him at all costs. We all will"

"He won't," she laughs "I've betrayed Jason too often now. There's no going back. Clay it's all my own stupid fault" she laughs " Sonny was right. I drink and just can't control myself, but I can't stop drinking and now I have to pay for that"

Clay doesn't think he's ever seen her be this vulnerable "Okay so you need help for the drinking that's all " She shakes her head. He puts his hand on her cheek as a tear runs down. He wipes it with his thumb "We'll get you some help. We'll be there" he looks at her "C.J … I …I ..care about you and I care about him, even though he's not mine!"

"No… don't say that okay! Clay just don't! I'm no good for you and you need to stay away from me" she's trying grab a hold on her emotions and the best way she knows to deal with this is to get angry with him. She clenches her fist and purses her lips she could scream " _Don't do this!_ she points at him "You don't need all this in your life right now and I can't deal with it! So please just leave me alone!" _Arrrrrrghhh!_ She scream, angrily "Why did you have to say that Clay?"

It's too late to stop him he suddenly leans forward and kisses her full on the lips. And here they are, right back where they started. Just like that first night they met. He just wants her when everything screams that he shouldn't.

She's so tired and she pulls away, but he takes her head in his hands and holds her. Looking her fully in the eyes. Then he puts his lips on hers with a softness, kissing her and watching her until she finally lets go and reaches back to him with her kiss.

Now they're just kissing, eyes wide open watching each other. She keeps trying to resist, her mind clouded but he won't let her go. His tongue searching between her lips until hers meets his and entwined they kiss like never before with total abandon.

She strokes his face, slowly reading every part of it with her fingers, her hand on his cheek, feeling the rough of his beard. She lets outs a deep relaxed sigh and in this moment she releases all of her tension "Clay…..."

 _"Shhh!"_ he puts his hand to her lips silencing her before he covers them with his mouth.

Now they're all over each other. Her breathing quickens their tongues twist against each other their mouths can't get enough. Then he's kissing down her neck, pulling at the towel wrapped around her body he can't get to her flesh quick enough as he tugs it undone. His mouth is all over her breast, kissing and sucking with an urgent need. She leans back enjoying it, pushing herself against him. _Mmmm!_ She groans as her breathing becomes more and more rapid. He's running his hand down her body lower and lower till his hand is between her thighs.

" _Oh god! … Ohhhh my god!"_ she thinks she might explode with his touch before he gets any further. Her desire for him taking away the loneliness she's been feeling as their bodies collide. She's shaking her head; her body is trembling. "Clay.. we shouldn't be doing this!"

She's right, this really shouldn't be happening but there is no way either of them will stop now. Grabbing at his belt she pulls at the buckle. It gets stuck and she laughs. He smiles backing of to sort the problem. He puts his hand to her cheek "You want this?"

"Yeah!" she nods "Yeah! I want this" she knows it's wrong but that's the truth she does want it, she wants him.

They don't take their eyes off each other. He takes his pants off as she lays back ready for him, putting her hand around the back of his head as he leans forward, she pulls his mouth back onto her body, kissing her breast and down her stomach. The tingle of excitement rushing over her skin. She smiles, closing her eyes she lays back to enjoy this.

He's kissing across her stomach; he has his eyes on her scar running his hand gently over it. Then he drops gentle butterfly kisses around it while she fists at his curls grabbing at them pulling his mouth back to hers and once again they're locked together kissing as he's slides his body between her legs

 _Ummm!_ She groans, leaning back as he thrust his hardness inside her, thrusting against the soft of her body " _Oh god Clay!…..oh shit!"_ she smiles the power and the strength of his fuck. She missed this.

He's using all of his strength, thrusting, rocking forward deeper inside her "Oh… he grunts _Mmmm!_ " CJ I missed you" his thrust get faster he's ready to cum. It's taken all of the control he has for it not to be over the minute he plunged into her soft warmth. She arches her back and pushing her hips towards him, gripping at the covers  
 _Aahhhhh!_ She gasps breathlessly "Oh God… Clay... _oh shit.. I'm gonna cum!"_ she cries out as she reaches the peak of orgasm. Her breathing rapid and panting. And then she relaxes. _Hmmmm!_ She smiles.  
The minute he can feel the clench of her muscles subside its over for him he release his warm wet cream inside her "Oh god! Oh, jeez oh yeah CJ!"

And then he relaxes _"Ohhhh! Jeez_!" he lets out his breath he was holding. Smiling, brushing her hair back from the warm sweat on her forehead. He didn't realise until this moment just how much he missed sex with her.

"Clay…" she kisses him "I'm so sorry. That shouldn't have happened"

" _Shhh!_ It's okay! This wasn't your fault that was mine" he smiles "I wanted it as much as you did! Holy shit!" He laughs "certainly wasn't expecting that this afternoon" he laughs continuing to brush her hair away from her face. They lay on the bed laughing.

Clay checks down the pillow next on the thankfully JC is still asleep.

Clay pulls her beside him wrapping his arms around her as she lays her head on his chest, drawing circles on his skin with her finger "This is nice!" she smiles as they lay there in the peace and quiet. She's already half asleep. Her mind at long last restful. Just concentrating on her touch on Clay's skin, listening to him breathing.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

 _**Bleep** Bleep** Bleep** Bleep**_

Clay's cell phone he checks "Oh shit you have to be kidding me. I'm being spun up!" he frowns looking at the message "Look, I'm so sorry... I'm going to have to go!" he shakes his head _Shit!_

"I know" She smiles. "Doesn't mean I like it but…I guess you have a job to do, right"

"Will you stay here till I get back" he kisses her "I mean if no one knows you're here. We'll sort this out, when I get back, okay?" he strokes her cheek as she leans up and kisses him.

He's getting dressed. She doesn't say a word "CJ..I said will you stay?"

she sighs then nods "Okay.. I'll stay"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Reuben answers his phone "Yes!"

"He's not been back to the apartment. What do you want us to do?"

"Keep watching it. He'll be back at some point" he pauses "I want to know _anyone_ he speaks to and where he goes."


	34. Chapter 34

**Chapter 35: Take him in the morning**

The team arrive from operations and Clay's showered and dressed before everyone else. That never happens. Clay is always the longest in the shower and Ray looks up frowning suspiciously at Sonny as they're only _just_ leaving the shower room

"So, what's going on with him?"

"I have no idea" Sonny shrugs "Hey, Poster boy you got a hot date or something? What's making you rush around like your pants are on fire?

"Yeah something like that" he says getting his bag together

Sonny looks at Ray "Okay now spill! Clay, was going on?" Sonny's curious something going on, the way Clay's acting is definitely not right

"No, no nothing going on like you say something with a girl that's all! I said I'd call before we got spun up. I don't want her to think I've given her the brush off!"

"A Girl?" _Hmmm!_ "Well okay…so, call her then, tell her you back and no need to rush then I mean ya don't need to do it in person do ya?" Sonny frowns "Cos we wuz all going for beer, what you not comin?"

"No, I'm just was gonna head back, I'm tired. Won't be no fun for you all" he smiles

Jason enters the room he looks around at them "Hey, what's going on?"

"Well now…we don't rightly know, do we Spenser?" Sonny looks at Jason, "we trying to get to the bottom of it, but Clay seems to have gone all coy about some new girl he's seeing, aint that right Blondie?"

"I've not _gone all_ anything. I don't know why you all making such a fuss, it's just a girl." He knows they know he's lying but he sticks with his cover story "Fine.. okay I'll come for damn beer, if it'll keep you quiet"

Sonny frowns he looks at Ray "You know I'm still not buyin' this bullshit, how about you Ray? I mean this aint like you Spenser. You're definitely hidin' something and I'll find out what it is. I can tell something definitely aint right!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They're all at the bar and Clay's acting agitated. He really wants to head off, but he knows Sonny is on his ass to catch him out. He looks at his watch, again.

"Hey.. Clay, you know that's the fourth time you looked at your watch there. You gotta be somewhere else?"

"No like I said …"

"Yeah you said… just a girl. Yeah, I heard ya. So, then what's this girls name? I mean this mystery woman who is she?"

"Her name, what does that matter? ...Why what? You wanna check on her or something Sonny?"

"Well not being funny..." he sniffs " your last date didn't end up going so well. So perhaps wouldn't do no harm to be a little concerned, right? So, wheres she work?"

"I don't know we haven't been out, yet I told ya we not dated I just liked her and was gonna arrange something"

Sonny nods his head "So where you meet her, then?

"Just at a bar! Sonny what the hells with all the questions?"

"I told ya, just being cautious. Cos this all sounding very vague to me" Sonny laughs he can't believe Spenser's still lying to him

"Yeah to me to" says Jason frowns as he arrives beside them, listening to the conversation "So, Poster Boy, what's going on? You know we could do without any more drama"

"Nothing! Look, there's nothing going on" Clay can feel himself getting annoyed now "So stop with the interrogation"

Jason looks at Ray and then at Sonny. Now they're all suspicious but Clay's had enough and knows if they continue he'll dig himself into a corner "Okay tell ya what I'm out of here ...I'll see you all laters"

"Okay!" Jason nods frowning

"Hey boss, you want us to follow him. Find out what's going on?"

"Nah leave the kid...let him do what he wants" Jason chews his gum "It'll come out what he's up to. We just be need to be cautious and keep an eye on him!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay taps gently on the motel door "CJ... CJ, it's me...Clay!"

She opens the door and smiles "Hey... finally! I didn't think you were ever coming back"

"Me either. I'm so sorry! That op went on and on and then the guys were questioning me and wouldn't let up, so I couldn't get away"

"Everyone get back okay?" She frowns "They don't know you've seen me though, do they?"

"Yeah everyone's fine and no…no I bluffed them off. They bought it" That's not exactly true he's not sure they actually bought his story, but he knows they don't suspect it's her that he's seeing. J.C 's crying "He been okay?"

"Yeah he's been good" she smiles "I guess he's fed up being cooped up in here like me. We've not been far this past couple of days"

"You wanna go out for a bit?"

"Hmmm "You know as tempting as that is. I don't think it's a good idea do you? "

"I don't know, I'm not sure I understand what's going on. How about I take him out for a bit. Just while you have shower sure you could do with a break. I'll get some food.. some Chinese?"

"Yeah, if you want" she smiles "Sounds good to me"

"Or, we could…" He grabs her around the waist and kisses her " we could you know!"

"Clay stop! You know that shouldn't happen again"

"Yeah probably not but …. "He kisses her again "but I can't help that I like doing it"

She smiles and kisses him back. He runs his hands round the curves of her butt and pulls her towards him "Clay really, don't!" she says it half-heartedly as he kisses her again.

 _Mmmm!_ " So really, you want me to stop?"

"I um… "She closes her eyes, she's thinking "I just don't think...we should .."

"Shhh!" he puts his lips to hers and his tongue finds hers and this is why she can't resist him. Her arm looped around his neck they drop down on the bed. Then she looks up at the sound as JC starts to cry again.

She stops and smiles at Clay face as she puts hand to his groin and the large bulge that's groaning against his pants _Hmmmm!_ "Well, looks like this is gonna have to wait" 

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay's been out to get food and some other supplies. He smiles watching as JC's now fast asleep on his little nest of pillows on the floor. _He's just so cute!_

She's showered and sitting on the edge of the bed he lets out a long sigh. She smiles watching Clay watching JC

He looks up at her "You okay?"

 _Mmmm!_ "Yeah, I guess" She wearily nods. She's just sat there thinking. She feels sick and her heart sinks as she looks up at Clay then back at the sleeping JC "Clay, you um…you need to take him in the morning" she doesn't take her eyes off JC as she speaks "I can't risk you getting spun up again and putting this off anymore"

"What? " he frowns "Wait CJ...you want me to take him… No, no you don't have to do this. There has to be another way Please just let me speak to Jason"

"No!" She shakes her head "No this is the only way" she gulps turning to look at him, she puts her hand on his cheek, staring him deep in the eyes. Then she kisses him whiles she holds back her tears "Clay stay tonight? Stay with me, please. I don't wanna be on my own"

"Yeah …yeah of course " He had no intention of leaving her tonight. He nods as he leans forward and kisses her. She watches him, giving him this deep intense stare, her hand on the back of his head she drags her lips gently across his as he twists her around, pushing her down on the bed, his leg wrapped over hers as they continue to kiss. His hand finding its way up her thigh under the towel and up to her breast, squeezing gently.

 _Mmmm!_ "CJ! " he smiles, the feel of her skin is turning him on. He's just touching, caressing her body gently and she closes her eyes as the sensation resonate up through her body.

Then he tugs gently, pulling the towel undo and exposing her naked body and is down kissing her chest and stomach. There is no stopping now as whirlwind of hormones shoot through them both. She lifts her leg and he runs his hand down her inner thigh. She gasps sucking in air rapidly as she looks him in the eyes, enjoying the touch of his hand as it finds the most sensitive parts of her body

Suddenly she starts to cry and is biting her lip hoping he doesn't notice but he can feel the movement of her sobs and stops. "Hey!... What's wrong? CJ...you Okay?"

she shakes her head "I don't know"

" _Shhh!_ " he comforts her, stroking her hair, but she can't stop. He's kissing her between each of her sobs trying to take all her pain away, but it just makes her more emotional. She's trying to get herself under control.

Kissing him, pushing herself forward towards him, making it clear that she wants him to carry on. _Aahhhhh!_ She gasps as his strength enters her fully and in all the emotion she continues to cry.

He's being gentle, using small controlled thrusts against her and kissing her lips, they're just so relaxed with each other. Him burying his head in her neck, closing his eyes so he can concentrate on holding back. She looks at the ceiling, her tears rolling down her cheek. Accepting that this is probably going to be the very last time this happens.

 _Aahhhhh! Oh god... "Clay yes!"_ he's just in the right spot now, rubbing his fingers against her clit, stimulating her to a peak. The wave of orgasm rushes over her body flooding it with sensations as he pushes deeper inside her. She grips, fisting at the cotton sheet while covers and he kisses her neck. Then there's this rush inside them they both groan loudly, muscles clenching against each other. Clay can fill the warm fluid filling his groin. The muted grunts as he continues to plough harder into her until he can no longer contain it. She smiles relaxes from her state of heighten pleasure. Their tense bodies collapsing sweaty, breathing hard against each other as they relax.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The morning light comes through the break in the curtains and Clay wakes to find her sat on the floor crying. She has J.C in her arms. He sits up worried "CJ... what's happened?

"Nothing…nothing he's fine just …" she sighs "just enjoying these last moments with him"

He slides down on the floor to sit beside her and notices that she's already dressed. She wipes her tears from her face, and he looks at her "CJ, don't do this."

"I have to" she swallows the lump in her throat "Look, I'm going out for a while. Please...just don't be here when I get back" she sobs openly now _Oh shit!_ Closing her eyes tight as she hands her little boy to Clay's arms.

"No…" He shakes his head but as she looks at him and he realises he has no other plan to offer her he nods "Fine! ... Okay I'll do this, but only because you asked me to. I'll take him to Jason's but please ...please be here when I come back. Promise me CJ. I can't lose you"

She rubs her head with both hands in despair but doesn't reply then leans over and kisses first Clay and then Jaycee. The lump of emotion in her throat ready to choke her at any moment. She leans her head back and starts to cry putting her hand to her mouth. _Urggghh!_ She gets up, picking up her baseball cap and putting on and then she opens the door

"Goodbye Clay!"

She stands outside the door of the motel room leaning against it, sobbing and doubled over in physical pain, the knot in her stomach is too much to bear. She cries out. Clay can hear her; he's still sitting on the floor comforting JC. He has his head under his chin and kisses it he tries desperately not to cry by biting his lip

o-o-o-o-o-o

CJ finds the nearest bar "Large whiskey!" she demands of the barman. Taking her cap off she runs her hands through her hair.

As the barman place the glass in front of her she sits staring at the amber liquid almost having to dare herself to drink it. She runs her finger round the edge of the glass then picks it up. Examining the contents before putting it down on the bar in front of her. She's almost in a panic as she contemplates drinking it. She closes her eyes to calm the turmoil inside her and as she opens them she lets out a sigh but just continues to stare at the glass.

Then as she runs her hand through the length of her hair she picks it up and knocks the contents back. In one gulp into her mouth, holding it there, burning her tongue. Her hands have stopped shaking as she carefully stands the glass down. Then she consciously swallows the liquid she'd been savoring, holding in her mouth. She tips her head back feeling the fire of the alcohol in her throat and deep in thought she pushes the glass forward and looks at the barman "Give me another!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay arrives at Jason's house. Sitting in the road opposite he doesn't move. Taking deep breaths while he contemplates what he's about to do. Just as he opens the door of his truck to get out he notices a dark colored car outside. Then he spots the two detectives from the other day, they're at the door talking to Jason and he watches as Jason invites them in.

He pulls his door shut. Sitting still with Jaycee _Shit…now what?_ he sighs _I can't go in there, there'll be too many questions that I can't answer_

He sits waiting in the truck for ten more minutes but still the detectives don't leave. Now Jaycee starts to cry "It's okay...shh! Uncle Clay will sort this" he starts the truck and moves off. He thinks about going back to the Motel, but he can't put her through this again and he has the bad feeling that she won't even be there. He thinks about going to his apartment, but he doesn't have anything for the baby. "I know where we'll go!" He smiles taking hold of Jaycee's tiny hand in his "It's gonna be okay"

o-o-o-o-o-o-

Naima opens the door to the knock "Clay!?" she's surprised and then confused when she sees a sleeping JC on his shoulder. She gives him a puzzled look but invites him in, knowing he wouldn't be there unless he needed to be

Ray's sat in front of the TV when Jameelah calls out "Daddy, it's. Jaycee! Can he play with me?"

Ray looks around unsure of what's going on "What the ...?"

Clay nods, he sits, the now awake, baby down on the floor with her and she starts to pass him some of her toys.

"Clay What the hell?" Ray frowns "Alright you better start talking!" he has the biggest confused frown on his face his eyebrow raised.

Naima looks at Ray "I'll get some beers look like you'll need one."

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

"Hey um…. Jace, brother …" Ray's on the phone "look could you um... come over? I've got um...I've got a problem with the pipework I need a hand with" he lies. It's the only way he can think to get him to his without raising Jason's suspicion.

"Yeah… yeah um... yeah sure. Alright, I'll be over as soon" Jason's confused but he buys the plumbing story. Collecting up his jacket he goes the garage to get a bag of tools.

Ray and Spenser have another beer and Naima takes the baby to the bedroom to lay him down for a nap. Ray looks up watching Clay who's sitting quietly, lost deep in thought.

The knock on the door makes them just and brings their focus back to the room. Both Ray and Clay take a deep breath and look at each other as Naima answer the door "Jason" she smiles unconvincingly

"So, what's the problem with these pipes your old man can't fix?" he smiles, carrying his small tool bag and setting it down just inside the doorway .

"You um… you better come in" The tone in her voice and the look that she gives makes suspicious almost immediately

"Naima ? Okay what's wrong?" As he enters the living room he can see Ray and Spenser sitting there, both holding beers "Okay then so what? What the hell's going on here?"

"Jason sit down brother"

"I don't wanna sit down. What is this bullshit? Ray Just tell me, what's going on?"

Naima comes from the bedroom carrying JC who hearing his daddy's voice, woke up crying. "Sorry… but he heard you. He's a bit upset"

Clay takes him. "Hey… you poor little guy. This has all been a bit much for him"

"Okay..."Jason takes a deep breath staring at Clay. He has a feeling of dread in his gut now "So were the hell did he come from and what's he doing here?" Jason frowns searching for answers "You got something to do with this Clay?"

"Jason, we need to talk!"

"No…no see _we_ don't! I have nothing to say to you regards him... it's done!" he points at J.C

"Jason it's not what you think ….. "

"CLAY! I said it's _done!_ Do you hear me? _NO_ more about this bullshit!" he's fuming and hurt "Why did you bring him here? This means you've seen her. Did she call yo _u_? Oh wait… have you been seeing her again" Clay nods confirming he has. It makes Jason even more furious and he gets up, headed towards the door to leave "Yeah, well good luck with that!"

"Jason brother, please just listen to him. Let him explain" Ray frowns trying to stop him "Jace just wait!"

He stops where he is at the door "I don't wanna hear it Ray, I'm done with this... do you understand me? I can't keep doing this with her"

"Jason you need to listen. Seriously man... it's not what you think"

"It's not what I think?" Jason shakes his head staring at Ray" I see what it is. _HE_ brought him here to rub my nose in it "

"No…no Jason it's not that! Just listen to what he has to say"

"No, I get it" he looks at J.C and then them "She told you didn't she…who's his father. She told you. Well fine, I guess he's your problem now, not mine. Just don't involve me anymore."

"Jason… he _is_ your problem. Oh my god" Ray sighs exasperated "If you would just stop being so damn pig headed for one minute and listen to the man, he's gonna tell ya what she said"

Jason looks up at Clay, still standing holding JC "Jason..." Clay takes a deep breath these words don't come out easily "he's ...he's not mine!"

"Right so you say. Did she tell you that?" he frowns "Cos, she told me the same line."

"Yeah she told me but um.. I.. "he gulps ".. . I also got a test done, a while back. It confirmed what she said. Jason, he's not mine" he smiles "I wished he was, but truth is he's not. Look I got the letter" he holds the test result paper out for him to see as Jason looks at him, confused and shocked..

"Jason did you hear him. He's not Clay's!" Ray frowns watching him as he takes in the information

"No… no he's not mine either so best you take him back to her! Let her deal with it" Jason gets to the door again and opens it

"Jason wait …. he is yours. She told you was a lie. She was pregnant before she took those pills, the overdose at my apartment. She was going to tell you the night you argued. Jason she's asked me to bring him to _you_ "

"But why's she asked you to go to her? You not wonder that. Why didn't she come to me herself?"

"I don't know…she says _people_... not just the police are watching you, the house" he tries to gauge some sort of reaction but can't "Jason she's so scared. I've never seen her like that" Jason's still not showing any concern and Clay continues "She says she can't protect him, but you have something… something of hers, that can? A file um… a list? ..I don't know what she meant but she said it would protect you "

Hearing this Jason stops and closes the door. Now the story is starting to sound plausible. He leans his forehead against the back of the closed door while he gathers his thoughts. Ray goes to him "Jason, Brother come and sit down."

Jason turns and looks at Naima she can see what he's thinking, and she takes JC from Clay and goes to him, handing the child into his arms She gives him a smile, brushing his cheek. He's so conflicted but finally with JC in his arms, close against his chest again. He smiles. His eyes well with tears as he nuzzles JC head under his chin holding him tight.

Ray looks at Spenser who looks away. This hurts even if he knows it's no this child. He realizes how desperately he wishes it was. The fact he isn't his Clay's son it really stings and he's missing CJ already.

Jason frowns. He softens his tone "So, is she okay?"

"Honestly…" Clay sighs and shaking his head "No, I don't think she is "

"Where is she?"

Clay has to think carefully before he answers, "I don't think she wants anyone to know. She said it was best for everyone"

Jason rubs his head "But _you_ know right but you're still not going to tell us? Even after everything that's happened." he shakes his head, he's disappointed that Clay won't trust him, won't tell him.

"Look, all I know is where she was when I left but … I'm not even sure she'll still be there now"

Ray feels like he should say something but doesn't know what so just sighs. All he knows is he glad Sonny's not here he'd be losing his shit by now. Everyone's at a loss of what to do and they all just stands there silent.

JC reaches he arms out to Clay; it makes Clay smile that he's reacting to the interaction they've had this week. Then Jason does something unexpected. He hands him back to Clay to hold it takes them all by surprise. Clay's face shows it as he takes hold of the child.

This small gesture seems to be Jason making peace with the situation. He sits down putting his head in his hands and rubbing his face "What the fuck am I going to do?"

Ray and Spenser exchange glances "Look, we'll think of something" Ray reassures him

"She didn't do this... I mean kill Nancy" Clay puts his hand on Jason's his shoulder

Jason nods "Yeah I know but how the hell do we prove it?"

Clay's dilemma now does he tell them where she is? "Look I've done what she asked me so... I think I'm gonna head off"

"You going back to her? Wow!" Jason's lets out a long breath

"No.. no, I'm going back to mine to shower, change and you know …perhaps get some sleep" he's lying he has every intention of going back to the Motel. He needs to know if she's still there.

"Is that where she is?" Jason laughs he knows Clay must be itching to see her it's obvious from the look on his face "You got her stashed at your apartment?"

"NO!" he frowns as Jason give him a questioning look, he's unsure he believes him "No seriously brother she's not at mine" he hesitates "she's ….she um... at motel, or at least she was she when I left. She left, told me to take him before she got back"

"So…" Jason laughs " she's probably propping a bar up somewhere by now"

"Who knows but…" Clay doesn't know "..yeah...yeah you're probably right!"

"Look Clay if you wanna go.." Ray gestures towards the door "We got him"

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah! We'll talk later, when everything's calmed down"

Clay nods. Saying goodbye to Naima, he leaves. She shakes her head there no winners in all of this she even for once feels sorry for CJ she can't imagine how worried she must have been to send her child away. "I'll put some coffee on"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay goes back to his apartment. His head's spinning with questions, wondering what to do. He knows he needs to shower first, change his clothes. Then he decides he will head back to the motel. He needs to know if she's still there. He doesn't dare call or text her phone in case the police are tapping it.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Reuben's phone rings "Yes"

"Yeah, he's just come back"

"Is he alone?"

"Yeah"

"Okay then. Well you know what to do"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay hurries. Running down the stairs two at a time out into the daylight of the street outside. He checks the time on his watch. Time is moving fast. He hopes to god that she's still there.

He hurriedly turns into the side street then stops _Shit my cell!_ He remembers he's left his cell phone on charge. In the rush to leave he's forgotten it. As he turns around he has to go back to get it and as he runs heading back to his apartment a black SUV pulls up beside him.

Two guys jump out "Clay Spenser?" a voice he doesn't recognize calls to him.

"Um…yeah who's asking?" he frowns _Urggghh!_ He cries out as the next thing he knows something stings hard in the crook of his neck. He puts his hand to it as he can feel the burning sensation but before he manages to turn to see what's happened or who did it he drops to his knees.

Everything goes into a blur and he can't focus. He's swimming underwater in a cloud of semi-conscious haze. All his senses are suddenly shutting down _. Shit!_ He gasps for breath. He can hear voices, but they sound far away. And then he finally collapses to the ground as he passes out.

The van door slams shut, and the street is once again empty.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The big guy pulls out his phone "We've got him!"

"Good!" Reuben hangs up the call and smiles. Flicking back to the videos on his phone. He finds the one of Catherine from that night at the hotel and with his feet up on the desk he smiles as he presses the play button.


	35. Chapter 35

**They've got Clay!**

Jason's still sitting looking at Jaycee, playing on the floor

"It's still bothering you isn't it?" Ray frowns looking at him "Look man, just get the test. Then you'll know for sure"

"I don't know Ray, I'm confused. I mean, one day she says one thing, then…" he shakes his head

"You know there's nothing wrong with getting a test. Hell, who knows if she even knows, right?" Ray closes his eyes, the moment he said that he knows he shouldn't and wishes he could take it back "Sorry!... Sorry, I didn't mean that. I mean, it didn't come out how I meant." He sighs "Look Brother, what's holding you back?"

Jason takes his hat off and runs his hand through his hair "Oh, I don't know Ray. I just feel like if he is then…then I feel like I didn't trust her and feel like I should just know. You know .. I should _feel it_ , that he's my flesh and blood. And then … what if he is not. Who the hell's is he and then what happens to him? Do I give him up to strangers or what? Ray she asked me to take care of him so maybe I'm better not knowing"

"Jason, get the test." he looks at him full in the face "Then we work the problem from there"

"Yeah.." Jason nods " you're probably right, maybe I should"

"So…." Naima looks at them both as they quietly sit there " are you leaving him here for how? I made up the bedroom for him to stay, if you want."

"Why?" Jason looks at her confused "Why would I want to leave him here?"

"I just thought with what Clay said, that if they are watching for you and you take him home they'll know you've seen CJ and it might put you both in danger."

"Yeah…"Ray nods "you know Naima's right. They gonna think you know where she is if you take him home."

"Yeah but…." Jason rubs his head "I can't put this on you"

"Yes…yes you can" Ray looks at Naima to check she's okay with it "Jason we said we would help you brother and that includes keeping you all safe. At the moment no one knows he's here"

"Okay …Yeah, maybe it's best till we know more. You know, I think I'm also gonna send Mikey and Emma away too. I'll send them with my mother, just until this thing blows over"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

C.J wakes. She's back in the motel room. She opens her eyes and surveys the surroundings. She sighs relieved that there's only her here, "Well, that's a good start!"

Then she sees the half empty bottle of JD on the side table. She sighs again "Could be worse. It could be empty I suppose"

She checks the time on her watch, wondering if Clay is going to come back. He's been gone a while now and it surprises her then it would be no surprised if they'd been spun up since he left.

Sitting up she takes a deep breath. Running her fingers through her hair she decides she needs to take a shower.

It's still quiet as she finishes drying herself. She checks the time on her watch again "Now what?" she wonders what to do with herself and turns on the TV flicking the channels, bored. _Hmmm!_ She frowns looking at the bottle that still sits where she left it. Picking it up she tightens the lid and drops it into the trash can beside the bed. She has to think, and drinking won't allow her to do that. She needs to think about where is she going to go to get away and she knows that they have to think that she still has the list at least until they find her.

She lays flat on the bed on her back looking at the ceiling. She's still wondering if she will see Clay. _One more time._ She smiles to herself as she thinks about their time together.

Her cell phone bleeps, and she frowns thinking it's _Strange!_ She already told Clay not to call her as she's certain someone will be tracing it. She's made no calls knowing they will register and she knows even if the police are not trying to track her down then Reuben certainly will! And he worries her more.

Apprehensively, she opens the text

 _You took something of mine. So, I have taken something else of yours._ There's an attached picture file and heart beating frantically she opens it too _Oh shit!_

Her heart now skips a beat wondering perhaps Clay didn't get JC to Jason. Her breathing is heavy, and she can feel a fear and panic inside. As she opens the picture file _Oh god… no! Clay!_ There in front of her on her phone is photograph of a bare-chested Clay. He's laid on the floor of a room somewhere. And she can feel her body fills her with a scared dread.

"Oh shit!.. No!" she screams as she pulls her fingers through her hair. Her face crumples into a tearful mess. _Fuck!_ She puts her hand over her mouth "Oh Clay!" she takes a deep breath "You bastard Reuben" She so desperately wants to reply but she can't. That's what he wants. He wants it so he can find her.

o-o-o-o-o-o

 _Urrrrghhh!_ Clay grimaces as the ice-cold bucket of water wakes him. He sucks in air as the cold hits his bare flesh "Oh god!" His head hurts, it feels like a massive hangover, the way he did in Mexico, after that tequila night with Sonny. He blinks trying to get his bearings. He has no idea where he is or what's going on.

He has to shake the water off finding he can't wipe himself. His hands bound tightly to the chair he's sitting on. He pulls against the restraints, rocking the chair backwards _Shit!_ "Where the hell am I?"

There's a sudden loud crack as something hits him hard across his jaw. He wakes fully now as he focuses his senses "What the fuck! What the hell's going on?!" He's trying to think where he might be. He spits, his mouth full of blood

"Well…good morning Mr Spenser, and how are we now?" The English voice resonates around the darkened room "I'll guess you have many questions but let's make this as quick and painless for you as we can" The face in front of him smiles " I have just one question and one only. Where is she?"

"Go to hell!"

"Really…. Oh, and I thought that was such a simple one to start with. Just answer me and then you can go free. Now, I can't be fairer than that can I " he pauses, waiting for a response "You know…. she's not going to get very far. Not with a baby in tow, so the chances are she's going to need help and then… we will find her…oh and the baby. Such a cute baby he is too"

"I said .. go to hell!"

"Ahh! Now you see, I thought you might say that!" he sighs. He knows its going to be hard to get Clay to give her up and so he knows this is neither going to be quick nor painless. "You know I know Catherine and I know has this ability of getting men to protect her. She can convince them that they're special. She's manipulative and she always gets what she wants. You know plenty of better men have fallen for her charms, so you don't feel bad. Though normally I'd say you were nothing special, in a long line of not specials, but um…well the fact you've given her a child. Well no one's ever managed to do that"

Clay's brain is working fast trying to think. He wonders who this guy is and where he's been getting his information. He wonders why he thinks he's JCs father. Who would have known the connection between them? He's not sure if it's in his favor they think this or not. He says nothing.

"So… you neither deny nor confirm this Mr Spenser. That's always a good starting response"

The voice nods and then suddenly there's that loud crack again. Another punch lands square on Clay's jaw "God Dammit!" He grits his teeth trying not to cry out. He swallow the blood this time. The pain hurts but he says nothing.

"Fine you want to stay silent for now. Well that's of no concern. I just thought I'd speed the process up by giving you a chance to answer first. You're safe with us for now... we just need you to act like cheese for a great big rat trap, that's all" he smiles at him. "Serge here will be disappointed though. He likes to play with Navy Seals, don't you Serge?"

The large guy who must be Serge, nods as he lands another punch fully in Clay's face. This time he bloodies his nose and Clay struggles to stifle the _Fuck!_ That he wants to shout out, as the pain sears though his body.

"Oh…oh that looks so good Mr Spenser!" the _voice_ grins "Now…smile for the camera" There's a click as he takes Clay's photograph "You know, I'm sure she'll like that one"

Again, Clay realizes the information they have is outdated. They also don't know where J.C is either. They seem to still be assuming he's with CJ.

"Keep him under, until we need him again. We know these SEAL's have a habit of trying to escape"

The sting comes again in Clay's shoulder. He tries, but the way he's restrained by his hands and feet, there's no way for him to resist. And as the hypodermic injects into his blood stream his head clouds, his eyes blur and he's soon slumped, unable to move, in the chair. This time they don't give him so much and he's not rendered completely unconscious but he's still he's unable to move. Everything around him sounds and feel like being submerged underwater.

"Have a nice rest, Mr Spenser. I'll be back later. Hopefully Ms Lewis will have made some sort of move by then" he shakes his head "Hopefully seeing you're pretty little face like that should cause a reaction, before we have to take things any further well… unless of course she really doesn't care about you" The _voice_ smiles again as Serge unties Clay from the chair. He drags him onto the floor. leaving him there, unable to move as they shut the door and leave.

The English voice now makes a call "Yes, it's me! No…no as I expected, he gave us nothing but I've sent you the pictures"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Reuben's sitting at the dinner table and he opens the picture message on his phone. He smiles as he forwards them on to the text to the number he has stored under Catherine on his phone. As the message sends he smiles. Waving across the restaurant as he sees his dinner companion arrive. He stands up, straightening his tie before he greets her ""Mandy!" he kisses her cheek and holds out her chair for her "I'm so glad you agreed to dinner after all. I um…I took the liberty of ordering champagne; I hope it's to your liking?"

"Reuben you know, I'm still not sure this was a good idea" she frowns at him as she sits down

"Oh, but it is, and you know it." He smiles "So… how are you? I must say you look absolutely divine"

She smiles at the compliment. If she were to admit to anyone she did choose this dress with him in mind. Carefully thinking about the image, she wanted to give him. An air of authority but at the same time still looking sexy.

The waiter interrupts them to collect their orders and take the menus "Thank you" Mandy smiles

"So… Mandy, any word regarding Catherine and the um.. situation she's in. It must be worrying time for them all."

Mandy sips her champagne; she pulls at face and frowns. It's much sweeter than she thought it would be, but it's nice "No, no I've heard nothing ...well no one has said anything to me"

"Well, I took some liberty of my own. I mean as you're such a good friend I um.. called in some favours I'm owed. I hope you don't mind but looking through the police files their investigation seems to have stalled. They have no further leads to her whereabouts, and she's been careful and made no calls from her phone" he sips his drink "It's surprising, you would think with a baby that she wouldn't go too far. I mean Catherine has always been very resourceful and the um… US government did spend a fortune on making her more adaptable than most" He laughs "I'm sure she will find ways of covering her tracks so our best chance of finding her, before the police, is if she contacts Mr Hayes or….." he pauses "or even... Mr Spenser, maybe?!"

"Thank you!" Mandy smiles and places her hand on his "I don't think she's been in contact with anyone, but I'll speak to Jason and check. I'll tell him that you think we can get her off the murder charge and that we believe she didn't do it. If he's spoken to her I'm sure he'll tell me as a friend, and we can take it from there"

He locks his fingers through hers "Well you know, I feel like I owe it to her father, to help her. I worked with him for a long time" He smiles, and Mandy smiles back

The food arrives at the table "Shall we eat? I'm famished" he smiles at her over the table

She smiles watching him. The sound of his voice, his manners he really does have English charm about him, and she likes it.

All evening they just make small talk. Things about the general political situation in varying countries and other world affairs. Mandy thinks how nice it is to talk with someone who can hold this kind of conversation. The tier ones are great, but the finer intricacies of political affairs and they don't always get it, not the way Reuben does.

"You know Mandy, I'm so glad you agreed to have dinner. I kept hoping but I wasn't sure you' would give me another chance." He sips from his wine glass "You know I have a suite at the Carlton. I'm staying there on business. If you fancied a night cap?"

"Oh, do you?" She smiles and coyly replies "Well we'll see!"

He looks her in the eyes, holding her hand "You know we could always um… re live Mexico" he touches his phone on the table.

"Reuben!" she looks around the room and blushes "You did delete video, like you promised?"

"Oh… of course," he sits back relaxed in his chair "a gentleman always keeps his word" he smiles

She licks her lips seductively thinking how attracted to him she is. He pushes her boundaries and she likes the air of mystery and danger around him. "Perhaps you should order a cab for when dinner is finished then?"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay's coming around, the drug now wearing off. He squints his eyes; they appear to be only the only things he can move right now as his body won't. He looks around he appears to be alone in the room.

It's dark, only a little light, that's coming from under the bottom of the door. He can just about make out the room he's in. Four walls, the chair he was bound to, a mattress on the floor and _Oh great!_ A bucket in the corner. It looks like he going to be here for a while then

His head feels like lead and his jaw is really aching. He remembers thinking back how CJ must have felt when they found her in Mexico. She said it was like a headache from hell and now he agrees. He knows one thing more than the pain, he feels cold. _I guess I'll have to live with that!_ He sighs as he looks around. There doesn't appear to be anything to cover himself with.

Finally he manages to drag himself across the room and lays back on the mattress on the floor. His hands are chained, which is attached to an old radiator on the wall. He's tired and he closes his eyes, drifting into some sort of sleep.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

CJ is showered and more coherent. She's thinking about what to do now. She wonders if BRAVO know Clay is missing as she sits on the bed sighing. She can't call anyone without giving her phone and location away and she can't go to Jason direct. _They'll be watching for that or best case the police will._ She sighs again as she thinks about what she can do.

 _Okay… I need to get a message to Jason, some way, without being spotted. I need that file back._

She puts her baseball cap and some shades on before she leaves the sanctuary of the motel room.

Her first stop is the grocery store where she buys a pay to go cell for use as a burner phone. She waits outside the store, taking a minute deciding what she's going to do. "Right…" she sighs "I need to do this for Clay!" She knows that his life might depend on her getting this right

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay never showed for work.

"Spenser sick? " Blackburn asks Jason

"Oh…" Mandy who's in the room with them frowns, surprised "That's not like Clay. Late maybe but to just not turn up is that not strange?"

"I think, he had a few errands to run. I said it was okay" Jason lies. Though Jason's a little concerned about his where about he's also wondering if he met with CJ and perhaps, they got drunk and overslept. We'll that's what he's hoping. He said yesterday he thought she was in a bad way so that wouldn't surprise him.

Blackburn frowns watching Jason, there's something, he can't put his finger on it, but he's not convinced by the explanation. But when the Master Chief is ready to share no doubt he would .  
"Um… Mandy do you have time for a word" Jason frowns looking at her.

"Yeah.. um…. sure" She frowns as Blackburn leaves the room "How are you Jason?"

"Yeah… I'm good. Look I um…I need you to do something for me" he slips the flash drive from his pocket into his hand then closes his hand around it. He bites his cheek nervously as he thinks if he's sure he wants to do this. After all CJ had told him to keep it safe. But Mandy was safe, right? He trusted Mandy. He did but there was something nagging him, some doubt that he had about handing this thing over. After all it might be the only thing that could keep his kids safe. Should he trust it to anyone. Maybe he should wait, until at some point he was able to speak to CJ about it.

"Listen… "She puts her hand on his arm ".. Jason, I wanted to let you know. There are people out there who are working on this trying to find her" She smiles "Jason it's going to be okay. They know what they're doing. They will find him, JC, and her" she nods reassuringly at him "But um… to make things easier we … we need you to tell me, is if she contacts you. Jason they have evidence, that she didn't do it, that she didn't kill Nancy. But they do need to speak to her, before the police do"

Jason frowns, wondering who she has _working_ on this. What she says it makes his gut churn and it concerns him "What do you mean? Who? Who's working on this?"

"Look, I can't divulge that. But .. it's someone who use to work with her father, someone who wants to help her"

"And you know this person? You know them well… you trust them?"

"Yeah…" She smiles, blushing. "Yeah I know them quite well and yeah I trust them, now."

Jason's alarm bells are ringing, and he puts the flash drive back in his pocket without showing her it .

"So…sorry what was it you wanted me to do for you? "

"Oh um... you know I just wondered if you um… you wanted some lunch, with me. I just um …wanted some company. Adult company you know like a proper lunch date!" he feels embarrassed, but he had to think fast to cover himself and this is only thing he could come up with. He knows Mandy's attracted to him, that she's been waiting for him to ask her out so he's hoping this will deflect from what he was going to ask.

"Lunch date? Like a date …date?!" Mandy smiles, shes excited that Jason has asked her for lunch. A proper date with Jason. It's something she's yearned for, she nods "Jason I'd love to go for lunch with you"

"Okay!" Jason sighs "Okay, well I'll get changed and come get ya!"

"I'll be in my office" she smiles

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"So, you know what happen to poster boy?" Sonny asks

"No! No, I don't know the answer to that" Ray replies sharply

"Okay.." Sonny frowns at Rays abrupt reply it makes him suspicious "So um…what do you know about Clay?"

"Nothing!"

"Okay…" He turns staring "Ray how long we known each other?"

"What?" Ray looks up at Sonny he's confused "What's that gotta do with anything?"

"You don't think I can tell when you're lying or covering something up?"

"Look um… I know I'm sorry. Look really I wanted to tell ya brother but just the um…opportunity hasn't been there man"

"Well, best you do now then!"

"Alright but let's get some beers. Then we can talk in private!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Ray and Sonny are at the table Brock, Trent and Lisa come over and join them watching as Jason arrives with Mandy.

She sighs. She's not happy. The bulkhead is not what she had in her mind for their _lunch date._ And she thinks how different it is to Reuben's style.

"Um… so you wanna sit with the guys or on a table by ourselves? " Jason frowns, he feels really uncomfortable, really awkward.

"Um…a table to ourselves would be good. Give us chance to talk, on our own" she smiles rubbing her hand on his arm

"Oh um … okay then!" Jason rubs his head as they find a spare table. "I'll get some beers and a menu" he looks over and smiles at the guys

"So where is Clay?" Lisa asks As Ray blanks her she frowns and while she's not sure what's going on she'll accept the no answer for now. Thinking that she'll just find out details from Sonny later .

"So, what's going on with the boss and Miss Mandy?" Sonny nods towards them "Are him and her… you know?" Sonny winks

"No, I don't think so .." Mandy and Jason are not Rays biggest concern right now. He looks over and checks on them "But I suppose its no bad thing if they did .. you know. Be some distraction for him which might be good, right?"

"Yeah maybe" Sonny shrugs "I'll get some beers, and tequilas" Sonny smiles as he heads to the bar.

The bar is busy, and he sits himself on the stool to wait. Stuffing some of the trail mix in the bowl into this mouth. He smiles as to himself as a woman sidles up on the stool beside him

"So…you gonna buy me a drink cowboy?" She doesn't look at him her head turned away, watching the guys playing pool at the table in the corner.

"You know I would but um…." He looks behind him over at Lisa sat at the table with Ray "Look um .. No, I'm sorry I can't" He looks at her up and down as she sits there. Thinking how cute her little rear is and the long dark hair, on a normal occasion she would defiantly be what he likes "Sorry this cowboy taken now!"

"Oh, right! She get jealous does she, Davis I mean"

"What the fuck?" he frowns hearing Davis's name mentioned.

CJ drops her sunglasses and turns around shades and turns round " _Shhh!_ Sonny don't make a fuss just be cool" She frowns "We're being watched so just act normal."

"What _the_ actual fuck are you doing woman?" he looks around the bar to see if anyone's watching. "Have you totally lost your mind coming here?"

"Sonny, just buy me a drink. Make it look real. Like you're chatting me up"

"Buy you a drink?...Hell to the no!...CJ, you can't seriously be hitting on me in a bar, right?"

"Oh please…give me some credit!" she frowns at him "No… no I need to get a message to Jason, but um… he's being watched, and our phones are being traced so I need you to get it to him"

"What the hell?" he frowns but he plays along "Hey barman…. two beers and two tequilas" h. He looks back at his table, but no one is taking any notice about his absence yet

As the drinks arrive CJ drinks the tequila straight back first, then sips the beer. Sonny frowns "What the fuck are you doin?"

"Okay... I'll explain but don't react, just stay cool I'm gonna tell you something but don't look. The guys at the pool table, they're following Jason"

she drinks down her beer as Sonny carefully turns to look casually at the guys playing pool " Yeah I see em!"

"Okay… " she breaths deeper "I need you to let Jason know they've taken Clay."

"WHAT!? W…what did you say? Who. Who's got Clay? CJ where the hell is he ? Are you fuckin' with me? Is this one of your games?"

"No…keep your voice down and focus Sonny. Just listen to me" she smiles at him rubbing his arm "make it look like you're enjoying this"

He frowns at her "What the fuck are you doing you crazy bitch?" he looks back to check Davis can't see them.

"Just relax and play along, pretend you're chatting me up so they don't get suspicious" she frowns "Jeez it can't be that hard to chat a woman up, even for you "

"Yeah but it's chatting you up right… that don't come so easy!" he looks indignant "Hell would need to freeze over before I would wanna chat _YOU_ up!

"Yeah I know that the feelings mutual, let me assure you" she sips at her beer "But I need you to make it look real, so no one suspects. They can't know I'm here"

 _Shit!_ He looks at her and her at him. It's the first time he's ever looked at her this way and if he's being honest he can probably see the attraction to her Jason has. "Fuck what the hell am I doin'" They both swig their beer. "More tequila.." he smiles "I need to be blind drunk to even pretend to fancy you"

She smiles "Oh touché! Trust me Sonny if there was anyone else that I could have made contact with I would have chosen them first. But you're the only one likely to chat someone up in the middle of the day! "

He looks round and see's Lisa looking at them "Shit Davis has made us"

CJ looks around to the table where Davis is sitting with Ray and feels a bit bad that Sonny can't go and explain. Its then that she spots Jason at the table with Mandy. She takes a deep breath it stings. Seeing them sitting there together. "Oh, wow! She looks like she really got her feet under the table there now that I'm out the way." She rubs her cheek on Sonny's and whispers in his ear "Sorry! But I'm sure she'll understand when you explain. What's going on with Jason and the CIA bitch over there?"

"Oh that! Yeah well you know things happen things move on" he smiles at her seeing how it's getting to her. It gives him a weird pleasure watching her uncomfortable with the scene she's witnessing "Now get the hell away from me woman!" as he looks around he can see Lisa staring at him. _Oh shit!_

"Look here… this is my burner number" she writes it down on the napkin "Get Jason to call it, but _NOT_ from his cell phone" Sonny looks at it and frowns. He's wondering what she's upto, what kind of game she's playing " Sonny, are you listening? He can't call from his phone. They will be monitoring his calls. Did you get what I said?" She leans back and knocks back a second tequila "Tell him use someone else's phone, like yours or Rays, one not connected to him" She's watching him but he doesn't appear to be listening to her. So suddenly and without warning she kisses him full on the lips.

He's shocked and annoyed with her pushing her back but she does get his attention now. It focuses him on her and situation "Sonny, this is urgent! Now give me your number"

"What? "

"Cell number, your cell number write it down! I need a number to be able to call" Sonny frowns he's still not sure what's going on but he does as she says and writes his number also on a napkin

o-o-o-o-o-o

"Looks like Sonny's scored at the bar!" Ray smiles putting his thumb up in acknowledgement. Sonny nodding his head in reply. He gets up from his seat and walks over to where Jason's sitting, with Mandy. It's closer to the bar and he can get a better view of what Sonny's up to. "Hey Jace look brother, Sonny's scored. He's now getting her number!"

Jason looks over and smiles "Oh and ….. _BOOM!_ Look, he's giving her his. Wow, that's impressive for a pickup. She must be a smooth mover; I mean normally Sonny never gives his number out, let alone on a first date" Jason's laughs.

Ray's standing behind him and he laughs. The only one who isn't laughing is Lisa. She's sneering. She can't believe Sonny would flirt right in front of her face. Yes, okay they're not an official out in the open couple. No, that can never happen, but she thought their relationship meant something to him . But seems not as hes at the bar making out with another woman. ar.

She gets up and walks over to Jason, Mandy and Ray "You know what I think I'm gonna head home" she struggles to smile "leave you boys to play Don't wanna cramp anyone's style"

"Oh, yeah sure okay.. we'll catch you later then" Ray smiles

she looks over the at Sonny at the bar. As she heads out to leave it looks like the woman is kissing his cheek. Lisa swallows, she feels like she wants to cry she also feels like going over and saying something but that would only give her feelings away. She can't do that. It hurts and all she can do is leave.

As Ray stops laughing and he watches Sonny and the woman. He frowns, watching them more intently now. Realising there's something vaguely familiar about the woman. _"Oh my god!"_ he sighs panicking as he realises who the woman is _. Oh shit!_ He frowns now hoping that Jason doesn't realise too.

"I'll leave you to get back to your lunch" Ray smiles at Mandy who sips her drink. She's disappointed, this was not the kind of date with Jason she was hoping for.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Uh oh, looks like your lady's none too happy. She's leaving!"

 _Oh, shit!_ Sonny sighs "Jesus Christ this is your fault, you know that!"

"I'm sure she'll come around when you explain"

" _If!.._ If she lets me damn well explain. This is so typical of you" he necks his shot and washes it down with beer "CJ you are the biggest pain in the ass I've ever meet "

" _Shhh!_ Sonny…keep your voice down" she looks around making sure that no one heard him. She sighs "Get me another drink!"

He frowns as he looks at her "Get your own damn drink. I'm done. I'm not playing your games anymore"

"Look…just get Jason to call me, urgently! You this is about Clay.. you remember." she takes the other phone out of her pocket and shows him the pictures she's been sent of him, badly beaten

"Wait! What… _HOLY shit!_ You…you're serious?! I thought maybe you playing some…some Jason attention, getting game" he looks at her forgetting about Davis now, concentrating on the pictures on her phone

"What the fuck?! Sonny, you seriously thought I was making this up. No! Sonny you need to focus on this right now! This is serious. They will kill him"

"Oh fuck… " Sonny panics now "Give me two more tequilas" he demands from the barman. "And gimme that damn phone number" he kisses her cheek as he takes the number on the napkin and he also takes the tequilas away with him.

"Sonny…leave the drin..ks!" she sighs frustrated as he walks away with them.

She decides it's best if she left anyway. She looks up and around, over her shoulder, checking on the two guys playing pool. Thankfully they've taken no notice of her or Sonny; their eyes forward still concentrating on Jason.


	36. Chapter 36

**Chapter 36 - Get Clay back**

 _Aahhhhh!... Jeez!_ Clay wakes. His jaw's aching and throbbing with pain. The good thing about whatever it was they gave him to knock him out, it also killed all the hurt in his body but now as it wears off it all comes flooding back, especially in his face. He feels his nose. It's bruised, not broken but it certainly hurts.

His stomach growls and he realizes just how hungry he is. He can't actually remember the last time he ate. He sighs, yanking on the chains around his wrists. He pulls hard with frustration, but there's no budging it.

He sighs again as he lays back on the mattress, still rubbing his jaw with his hand, trying to massage the pain away. He frowns, wondering where he is? What day it is, the time and how long he's actually been here. He has plenty of time to think about things and wonders _How the hell long are they going to keep me here?_ He also wonders what's going on in the outside world and if anyone's coming for him.

The door opens and the light floods in. It hurts his eyes. Going from the dark of his incarceration to the bright of daylight it takes him time to focus.

"Are you hungry Mr Spenser? I'm guessing you must be by now" whoever this guy is he throws a bag, containing burgers and fries onto the floor. "Hopefully they won't need to keep you much longer. You just better hope she does something today. If not we may have to send her a reminder" he laughs

Clay doesn't speak as he tries to focus on the face of the person coming into the room. He can't make it out in the darkness with the light behind him. Then as the door closes, Clay makes a grab for the food. It's something to be grateful for at least they're feeding him.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Hey boss I kinda need a word"

"Yeah sure what's up Sonny?"

"Um… you know.. well it's um...it's kinda private" he coughs as he gets Jason's attention "Hey!" he smiles at Mandy. "Sorry for this. I mean interrupting your lunch an' all"

She smiles and sighs. This is really is not the lunch date she was hoping for. "So um.. who was the woman?" she frowns looking up at Sonny making conversation.

"The woman?" Sonny hesitates, not answering.

"Yeah, the woman at the bar, who was she?"

"Oh her…um… you know, just a regular bar fly …frog hop type!" He smiles "Has potential for a date" He laughs awkwardly and looks away. He knows Mandy's good a reading people and he doesn't want her getting suspicious.

"So um... what you want a word about Sonny?" Jason frowns pushing some of the fries from his plate into his mouth

"Um… not here, I need to speak in private. It's kinda personal" Sonny coughs "A delicate matter" he nods at Mandy. She's rolls her eyes and sighs she not sure she really wants to know what might be _private_ and _personal_ about Sonny.

"Really?" Jason frowns he doesn't know what to make of Sonny's sudden need for sharing. "You know Sonny, can this wait until we finish our lunch?"

"No! No…it's um…well I kinda need to get it off my chest, like now! While I'm in the um... the _sharing zone_ aint that what they say in all them fancy books that Clay's always readin' "

Mandy looks at Jason, she can see the look on his face. He's confused. He's never known Sonny willingly wanting to share stuff. He sighs It means it must be important "Can you excuse me a minute" he smiles at Mandy "I um.. I just need to deal with this."

"Yeah…sure" she sighs. No! This is definitely _not_ the lunch she hoped for.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They're at the back of the bar by the exit door. "Sonny this better be good. I've left a cheese steak burger for your sudden need to _unburden"_

"Oh, Jason trust me if I was unburdening my feels, then it wouldn't be to you, so don't sweat it. And also trust me the steak burger won't matter now" He hands him the napkin with the cell phone number that CJ left.

Jason's actually relived that Sonny doesn't want to share his _touchy-feely_ stuff with him, but he's confused by the number on the napkin "What the hell's this?"

"CJ .. " Sonny rolls his eyes " you need to call her" he stares at him "It was her, the woman at the bar, earlier"

"What?" He frowns "Are you serious? Sonny, are you kiddin me? "

"No! And trust me I wish this was a joke, but it's deadly serious. Someones got Clay!"

"What!? What the hell!"

"She showed me photos, she's got on her phone. Jason, someones got him!" he gives Jason an angry frown "I'm telling ya Jason that woman, I swear to god, whatever she's involved in. This is _not_ good for Clay! We need to get him back, and fast"

"What the hell! Who? Who's got him?" Jason can feel his adrenaline pumping through his body as he starts to dial the number

"NO wait!…Stop! Use mine. She said they're logging your calls, so not to call "

 _Shit!_ Jason takes a breath, he's in a semi-controlled panic.

Sonny can feel his tension "Hey...Boss, hold in there we gonna sort this, right? " Sonny tries to reassure him "Clay's family, and we're gonna get him back"

"Hey...whats going on?" Ray frowns as he joins them

"CJ! " Jason sighs "She was here ...at the bar. Someone's taken Clay"

"You know I thought it was her...what the hell's going on, where's Clay?"

Sonny shrugs " That we don't know yet!"

"Who's he calling?" Ray frowns watching Jason making a call

"Guess!"

Seeing them all gathered together, their faces looking fraught Mandy comes over "There something wrong? What's happened?"

"Yeah you could say that!" Jason looks up at her "Someone's got Clay!"

"Someone's got Clay…what? How do you know that?" She frowns confused "Hang on, Jason what the hell's going on?"

"I don't know but I'm hoping I'm now gonna find out" Jason sighs "We need to get back to base" Jason dials the number from the napkin "And Ray…get hold of Davis. Tell her to get her to get back there. Tell Trent and Brock to go back too" Finally he sighs as CJ answers the phone "Yeahs...it's me!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

CJ checks the time she realizes she fell asleep for a while. _Must have been Sonny's tequilas!_ _Okay…_ She admits to herself _probably not just the tequila probably the JD!_ The rest of the bottle she fished out the trash when she came back to the room.

She checks her phone "Come on Jason…call!" she sits on the bed nervously waiting. She's wondering if Sonny even gave him the message _Oh god! What if they've been spun up instead?_ She pours the last shot from the, now empty bottle of Jack Daniels, into her glass and sits looking at it. Then she checks her phone and the photographs of Clay. She sighs, closing her eyes as she throws the last of the drink into her mouth just as her cell phone vibrates, making her jump. _Oh, my god! Finally!_ She takes a breath **"** Hey!"

"Where are you? And where the hell is Clay. This better not be anything to do with you?" She goes silent at the sound of his voice taking a deep breath as she listens to his angry voice on the end of the phone "CJ? … C.J, are you there?... Answer me! God dammit, where the hell are you?"

"You can't come here" she sighs as she finally answers him "We need to meet somewhere"

"Where then?"

"I don't know … but it can't be anywhere public, or your house, they're keeping watch on you"

"Alright…I know where. Go to Rays. I'll meet you there"

"Rays?" she frowns " Um… yeah, yeah okay but .. no that's fine" she sighs and rubs her head getting herself together. She grabs her hat and shades putting them on before she leaves the motel room.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"You get to speak to her?" Mandy asks as she gathers her jacket and bag

"You need to go back to base. Tell Eric we need to prepare. We need to find Clay"

"What did Sonny say? And where are you going?" she can't tell what he's thinking at the moment "Shall I come with you?"

"No! No, you go back the base like I told you. You need you to check CCTV around Clay's apartment. See if we can log his whereabouts, also check his phone. See what calls he made and if you can get a location from it"

"Okay…" she nods. Taking a breath "Are you going to see her? I mean is that where you're going, to see CJ? Jason do you know where she is?" He doesn't answer "Jason… just be careful Jason" she puts her hand on his arm griping it tight

"Sorry...I need to go. Sonny you're with me. Ray we'll meet you at yours"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

CJ takes a deep breath before she knocks on the door to Ray's apartment "Coming!" She hears a voice call out and Naima opens the door. "Oh!" she frowns at first watching as CJ takes off her sunglasses off.

Standing staring she smiles "Naima…um.. I'm um... supposed to meet Jason, is he here?"

Naima bites her lip but doesn't say a word just makes a hand gesture for her to come in. She has no idea what's going on but she knows it must be serious if Jason told _her_ to meet at their apartment.

Naima is silent for a while. They both are. "Um.. can I get you a coffee?" Naima asks awkwardly. She can actually smell that she's been drinking.

"Um…yeah, sure that would be great" CJ nervously smiles as she looks at the time on her phone. _Oh god please hurry Jason!_

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Mr Spenser …hello again!" _the voice_ smiles looking at Clay once again bound tightly to the wooden chair. "I have to start with an apology because I'm sorry to say, we're back where we began yesterday. Unfortunately, Ms Lewis has been silent. To be honest I am surprised but... " He laughs "perhaps she's abandoned you after all"

He gives the nod to Serge that he's been waiting for and he unleashes a torrent of hard punches to Clay's face and chest. His head rocks back and he grits his teeth as he absorbs blow after blow. Spitting the blood out of his mouth, into his lap. Serge smiles as he reigns in yet another punch. Hitting him in the exact same place, over and over. The next one he lands, dazes and confuses Clay. The bruising on his cheek is already starting to swell.

"Do it again!" _the voice_ smirks. His tone cool and calm, no sighs of emotion except maybe one of enjoyment. He is enjoying this, enjoying watching Clay being hurt. Serge looks up as _the voice_ sighs and then nods. Again, come the bang and cracking sound to Clay's chin.

He braces himself for it this time. His hands flinch against the zips ties around his wrists that bind his flesh holding him tight, unable to move, to the chair.

He tries not to pull at them as they cut deep in his flesh like plastic razors that cause even more pain. He keeps making a fist to try to focus his hurt, concentrating on absorbing each of the painful blows. His nose is bleeding heavily, he can feel the wet it on his face and lips. His eye is cut, and his head clouded and dizzy. He feels like he might pass out soon but he tries to resist fighting, trying to stay awake.

"That'll do for now. I mean, we don't want to kill him, just yet. We might still need him" He bends down and looks Clay directly in the face "Mr Spenser are you still with us?"

Clay can hear the English in his voice, but in his confused state it sounds distant, far away "Oh dear, I'm not sure if he is." he laughs "Hold him still" Serge grabs at Clay's curls pulling his, now drooped, head back, exposing his face. "Smile for me Mr Spenser." _The voice_ laughs "No!? … Well never mind, this will get the message across, I'm sure!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Ray opens the front door with his key. As Jason enters he can see CJ sitting in the chair. She stands up and he nods to acknowledge her before he kisses Naima's cheek thanking her for allowing them into her home.

She's worried "Ray honey...what's going on?"

"I'll explain!" He sighs "Just give me a minute"

Jason looks C.J up and down "So, are you okay?" he asks in a brusk dismissive kind of way.

She nods ""Yeah.. yeah I'm good!"

"Well you don't look like it.. to be honest you look like shit! Have you slept?" The closer he gets to her the more obvious the smell of liquor is. He got use to ignoring it before, when she was drinking around him all the time but now he notices it.

She smiles and shakes her head "Not much" her lip trembles at seeing him, so close, standing in front of her. What she really hoped was he would come to her, hold her and tell her it was all going to be okay, but she doesn't think that's gonna happen, not from the way he speaks to her, the tone he uses towards her.

She sighs "Jason I um… I need that file back" she looks at him but he doesn't move "The one you've deleted from the flash drive. I'm guessing you saved it somewhere else?" she looks at him trying to read his mood "It's what they want… to give Clay back. "

"I didn't delete it. I swapped the flash drives, put some of the pictures on it"

"Right… well I need it back. Do you have it?"

He nods but doesn't answer her. They both look around at the sudden sound of a baby crying. It's coming from the bedrooms. C.J takes a breath, she recognizes the sound "Is that JC ?" she frowns

"I'll go" Ray looks at Jason and smiles . He returns not many moments later carrying the crying JC in his arms holding him close to his chest. She takes a sharp intake of breath and puts her hand to her mouth as she watches Ray hand him to Jason.

"What's he doing here?" she frowns. Its upsetting her seeing him. It was hard enough making her peace with letting him go before but she never expected to be see him now and it's thrown her emotions into turmoil.

"Keeping him safe" Jason frown as he watches her.

She swallows her emotions back into the pit of her stomach, running her hand through her hair. She's not sure what to do but as her hands shake she thinks about how much she wants a drink. Her mind tries to shut the feeling away as she looks at Jaycee, trying to get him to smile at her.

Jason turns him so he can't see her. "So do you know where Clay is, who's got him?"

"No! No...I don't know!"

"Come on C,J.. don't mess with me now. You gotta give me more than that. Stop playing games, this is serious. Clay's life might be a stake here."

"I am serious… I don't know, where he is. He was supposed to come back to the motel and he didn't. Then I got sent the pictures. That's all I know ... Jason, I swear that's the truth"

"So, who? Who would do this, you must know that?"

"Yeah…" She nods " Yeah I think I know, Reuben Davis. He's um… English, ex UK intelligence. He trained with CIA for a while, a long time ago. I um.. I don't know who he works for now. Probably anyone who will pay him" Her hands are shaking, the extra adrenaline starts to course through her veins or maybe it's a lack of alcohol

"He...he used to work with my Father. Under the radar intelligence, intel gathering. He was really good at it. We…we go way back" she pauses "He wants that list, the one the flash drive. He's not the only one but I think Clay's disappearance is down to him. I ..I thought I'd given it to him when I got JC back, but I didn't know you 'd swapped it" Shes looking at Jason trying to read his expression as he stares at her. She hesitates then nervously continues "You didn't open it did you? "

"No!" Jason shakes his head "I was um…gonna ask Mandy to but some things didn't sit right with me. Something she said so I…I didn't do it. So you know why he wants this list so badly? I mean he's going to an awful lot of trouble, first JC and now Clay.. what the hell is on that thing?!"

"You went to Mandy!?" She's still processing what he's telling her "You do know shes been seeing him. She's shared information with him. With Reuben. I warned her from the start not to trust him, but I'm sure he's been feeding her info, bullshit stories leading her down his path. He can be very convincing"

"Look forget Mandy. What's he want with that file?"

"What doesn't he want with it." She laughs "That file… that list. It would put him at the top of the food chain" she swallows nervously "There are um… names, details, deals…everything. Anyone who's been involved in dirty dealings, CIA… government, Navy officers, you name it they're on that list. Hell, probably even some from the Whitehouse." she sighs "If he had control of all that information. He could make them targets. You know for blackmail, extortion for money. There are some really big players on that list. Some serious power plays you could start world war three from that list. " She rubs at her temples with her hands her head is throbbing from with stress now

"So, you've seen it? You know who's on it"

"Not all of it. My father had it specially encrypted so I can't open it anymore, not now he's dead. To be honest I don't know who will be able to open it, not without my father. I've seen extracts from it, time to time, that's all"

"So, when you say you and he go way back… this Reuben.. you mean work, right?"

"Um… yeah. He worked in my Fathers office in Washington. Not directly, special projects they were running I mean he wasn't' on any official payroll. Why?"

"Really .. cos I'm just wondering if it was just work… or if you mean a more personal kind of way. You know did something happen way back maybe? "

She frowns confused as he takes his phone out of his pocket and plays the video he has saved on it. He holds it up in front of her for her to look at. The sounds are enough for her to know what she's looking at and she watches as his face changes to a sneer "I mean according to the date on this.. it don't seem so way back?"

She swallows hard, closing her eyes and puts her hand to her mouth "Oh.. you son of bitch Reuben!" she bites her lip _Fuck!_ A look of despair comes over her as she realizses he's sent Jason the secret video he made of them in bed. She feels sick and screws her eyes tight closed, shaking her head. "Jason…please, it's not what you think!"

She's trying not to look at the images on the screen, but he continues to hold it in front of her. Her naked body sat astride Reuben's, his hands on her breasts, switching position him fucking her from behind. _Oh shit!_ She's pulling her hands through her hair because she doesn't know how to respond. Rubbing her palms against her forehead, sucking back her emotions as she tries not to cry.

"Jason…." She gulps not knowing how the hell she can explain that. "Please ... please I can explain. I was drunk …I was trying to get my son back please, you have to understand." she pleads with him.

He hands JC to Sonny and is now is up close in her face. Ray's not sure what he's going to do and just as protection he so puts his arm out between them to hold him back. "Hey Brother, steady" Ray scowls

"You know you _disgust_ me. How the hell could you do that! "

His tone, the way he says _you disgust me_ it cuts through her like a knife. She closes her eyes grabbing at her hair pulling at it trying not to cry in front of him. Jason won't look at her now she was trying to plead with him, begging forgiveness. But he doesn't forgive, he doesn't even acknowledge her. Switching his phone off he chucks it on the chair.

Sonny chews his toothpick. He has this smirk on his face, the one that says she's finally getting her comeuppance for her lies and that maybe finally Jason see's what she is _. A dirty drunken whore!_ He looks at her with complete contempt as he looks at JC who he's holding on his hip

"Jason please … you don't understand I was .."

"Drunk? Yeah we get that bit.. we've heard it before"

"No… no that's not what I was gonna say. I was trying to get our son back" She reaches out towards JC, but Sonny moves him away from her.

Jason's so angry now. He points at her and clenches his fist in front of her "Don't... alright, just don't!" he shakes his head "Look at you CJ… you're a mess "he sneers "You _need_ help. I mean proper help. Normal people don't do this type of thing. They're not involved in stuff like this." He shakes his head he's so frustrated with her "How many times CJ.. you're mess. You wreck everything you come into contact with." he takes a breath as he paces around the room thinking

"Okay.. " He sighs "so, this is how it's gonna be. First, we get Clay back. Then you're from me, gone from Clay and gone from him!" he looks at the baby "You're out of all our lives … for good. You understand me!"

She's holding all of her emotions back now. Anger, hurt, pain, sadness all of the tears. She grinds her teeth "Jason you don't mean that. Please… you can't mean that?" she begs him to listen, but he doesn't want to know

"Can't I .. we'll then you just watch me!" Sonny and Ray look at each other this is the first time they've ever seen him be this angry with her saying it like he really means it. Jason gets his grip back on the situation in hand. "So you got a number for this guy? This _Reuben_ guy"

She nods "Yeah but…"

" You shut up… it's me calling the shots now. You call him and you tell him, you wanna meet. We need to know Clay's still alive, tell him you wanna see him. He's not getting that file until you've seen Clay, in person!"

"He's…" She laughs "he's never gonna let that happen. Jason, you don't know him. He knows every trick in the book." she laughs off his suggestion "hell he probably wrote the book!"

"Then you _make_ him! You do _whatever_ you have to do, for you to see Clay alive. Do you understand. _DO YOU!_ " he grabs her shaking her and she nods.

"Yeah … yeah okay! " She rubs her head. She's hot and feels like she's losing it. She starts to shake. She has no idea how she going to make that happen. .

"Damn it CJ!" He bites his lip as he watches her, looking her up and down. He can see how on edge she is. Her body shakes and he wonders if maybe he's gone too far. She looks fragile, broken and he wonders if maybe he should ease up on her. "Get yourself cleaned up and then make that call. We'll go back to the base; see what intel we can pull about Clay's whereabouts"

He takes Jaycee from Sonny and kisses him. CJ puts out her hand to touch the baby's cheek, but Jason pulls him away and handing him over to Naima. "Jason...please!" She puts her hand to her mouth and holds back her tears. For the first time ever, Naima actually feels sorry for her.

"You keep her away from him!" Jason stares at Naima

"Jason man " Ray frowns "C'mon on be fair. She's still his mother. He needs her."

He glares at Ray "Keep her away! You clear Naima?" Ray looks at his wife who's nodding. Ray shakes his head, wondering if Jason's taking it a step too far. He glances a pitiful smile at her but ultimately it's not his decision, and he will back Jason over her any day.

CJ shakes her head "Jason please…don't do this to me" She's angry now. Raging inside. Wondering _How dare he speak to me like that_. Act like he has control over her. She holds back from a rant at him sucking in her tears of anger and frustration

Ray and sonny look at each other they also feel a bit sorry for her they've seen Jason rage at people before but his is harsh even by his standards but at the end of the day she brought it on herself.

"Jason please..." she begs him but he's not listening " You want my help to get Clay back?" she stares at him her tone now threatens him "Then _DON'T_ be like this! Don't do this to me!"

Her threats don't go down well with Sonny and he's up in her face, staring her deep in the eyes. Ray stands ready to step in just in case things go too far, he knows Sonny too well. "Now, you listen to me. You get this done. Do you hear? You do what needs to be done to get Clay back" he's still staring her in the face. He's so angry " _DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME, CJ?"_ He yells in her face " You get him back!"

Sonny's worried she's going to start playing games. Going to war with Jason over JC. When all he wants is Clay back safe. "If we don't get Clay back, then I'm holding you responsible, and I'll be coming for ya! We clear?"

"Yeah!" She gulps she takes Sonny's threat seriously "Yeah, we're clear!"

They quietly close the door behind them and CJ slumps down in the chair and starts sobbing hard into her hands while Naima watches her from the bedroom doorway. She feels sorry for her. She might deserve it, but the guys were really hard on her.

CJ looks up at her, trying to garner some sympathy, but Naima's strong and the years of knowing her has made her wise to her games so she's not falling for it. She takes Jaycee through to the bedroom without a word. No matter whether she feels she won't go against what Jason said.

 _Damn it!_ CJ can't focus. She has no-one on her side. Her emotions have been ripped to shreds. She's been humiliated by them all and she closes her eyes putting her head in her hands as she lets out the scream she's been holding in. _Arrrrghhhh!_ The she takes a deep breath. It's time to re-focus.

Her phone bleeps with a message. Another picture of Clay. _Oh shit!_ She looks at the picture of his bloodied face. He looks so much worse in this one. _SHIT!_ She closes her eyes tight _I need out of here! I need a drink!_


	37. Chapter 37

**Chapter 38: She's just Drunk**

**Back at Naval base command **

" _DAVIS!_ " Sonny calls out to her down the corridor "Hey…Davis I said hold up!"

"Sonny I don't have time for this "

"Lisa wait! Look, I need to explain, about in the bar earlier what happened"

"No… Sonny, really I don't have time. I'm running a traffic cam program and I need to check on it. I need to see if it's picked up the SUV that took Spenser!"

"Oh…oh yeah right! Well I'll let you get back to it but... just I wanted to say… about what you saw at the bar" he looks around to make sure no one's listening

"Sonny it's okay!" She lowers her voice "I know, and I know I jumped to the wrong conclusion. So, I'm sorry"

"Wait you're sorry? Hold up.. it should be me apologizing' I know how it must have looked"

"No!...I should have trusted you. I should have known there would have been something more to it. I know you wouldn't have done that to me, right?" she sighs "I dunno know, I guess I got jealous" she smiles "Is that wrong?"

"No!" Sonny tips his head to one side and smiles. "No, I think it's kinda nice!" He looks around making sure non-one sees them "Kinda… well kinda makes me feel special

"Look.." She blushes "we'll talk properly later but let's just concentrate on finding Clay first, right?"

"Yes Ma'am!"

Hesitating they stand there just staring at each other. Sonny's looking at her lips thinking how he could kiss her so easily right now. He chews his gum as he watches her, imaging them being alone.

She looks down at the file in her hand, smiling. She can feel his eyes on her and she knows what he's thinking about. "Sonny, can I ask you something?" she bites her lip, as she looks at him "I don't know why I'm asking this but… I'm curious. When she was coming on to you at the bar, if like it was for real, would you have been tempted?" she frowns "I mean, would you have been tempted by _her_?"

"What?! _Hell NO!_ " Sonny frowns "Davis, why the hell would you even ask me that?" Sonny's confused as he looks her in the eyes "Davis _no!_...Jeez you seen how messed up that woman is. Why the hell would I want that in my life? Hell, I can manage messed up all by myself" he laughs

"I don't know.." She shrugs, she feels somewhat insecure, about how she comes across in comparison to someone like CJ She drops her head "You don't see what they see in her? Jason and Clay I mean, she doesn't do it for you like that? I mean, physically she's and not being funny have you looked at her!" she raises her eyebrows "I mean her body is pretty damn amazing, right? Even I can see that!"

"No, can't say I noticed that"

Lisa frowns she purses her lips "Okay… now I know you're lying!" she laughs

"Well okay maybe…maybe I might see that attraction but that's all!" He sighs "Davis, she is seriously fucked up! She always has been. That body comes at a hell of a price tag, if you ask me! And fallin' in love with her… well that comes with a bigger one. Anyway…" he smiles touching her cheek "your body seems pretty damn fine to me"

He puts his hands on her hips holding her, turning her to look at him. "Sonny…stop!" Though she likes it, likes him holding her she can't take the risk that they'll get caught _Hmmm!_ "Yeah…" she sighs "yeah I think maybe she needs help, about that you're right but do you think her, and Jason will get through this,get back together?"

"What ?" Sonny laughs looking around over his shoulder "No… no I doubt it. Not now, not after the way he tore a strip off her today!"

"Really?"

"Oh yeah!" Sonny nods "Jesus wept. You know, I never seen him go at _anyone_ like that! I think that video, it pushed him right over the edge"

"Video?" Davis looks puzzled "What'd you mean? What video?"

"Um… that guy.." Sonny looks around and lowers his voice " the one they think is involved with Spenser disappearance. Turns out, she slept with him, and he um... he made one them, you know, home movies" he raises his eyebrows "Then would ya believe it .. he sent it to Jason"

"Oh my god! Nooo! Really? " her mouth drops open in shock "Are you serious. What the hell did Jason say?"

 _Mmmm hmmm!_ "I sure am serious. Well let's just say he laid into her about it" He nods, laughing "You know I can't believe what she does sometimes either! That was fucked up…even for her! So, I don't think…Jason's forgiving that anytime soon!"

Blackburn walks past, he stops looking at them "You two okay?" He frowns, suspicious of whats going on between them

"Um.. Yes. Yes Sir! I'm um.. I'm on my way back now, Sir!" Davis frowns. She doesn't like this she knows she's risking so much talking to Sonny like this "Look we'll have to talk later I need to go. Before I get in trouble"

"Yes, sure thing Ma'am. Lisa…we'll talk laters. We're good though, right?

"Yeah we're good" she smiles.

o-o-o-o -o-o-o

They set up command point, in the office. Davis is running traffic cams after a local one picked up Clay leaving his apartment. He was turning back just before, the SUV picked him up and she's trying to get location of where it went. She frowns looking at the laptop with the phone records list "His cell is still showing his apartment as its location" she frowns.

"Okay, well we need to head up there. Check it out. See if there's anything there that might give us his whereabouts, and we need to check if the cell phone is actually still there. I'll send Trent and Brock to take a look"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Mandy and Lisa are working alone in the briefing room. Both working from the laptops with the limited intel they have

"So…" Lisa smiles looking up " how'd your lunch with Jason go?"

 _Hmmm!_ She sighs "Yeah…not great!"

"Really? But I thought _he_ asked you to go?"

"Yeah he did. But apart from wanting to do a guy bonding session, we got interrupted by C.J…as is normal!" she frowns "Guess that's how it gonna be with her around, right! Hey.. it's no biggie. We're just friends really"

"Well maybe she'll be gone soon. And then you could try again." she looks behind her checking the doorway "You know… I know you like him, a lot!"

Hmmm! "Maybe…we'll see!" Mandy's blushes. She wonders if she's too obvious about liking him and she's never sure if Jason has time for her anyway "Would have been nice to see if something could have been. But you know me and him, this is probably or the best. Staying just friends." She looks back to the open door and she smiles "This this other guy I've been seeing…. well that's kind moved on as well"

"Oh…really? Well, fill me in?" Lisa smiles "So, what other guy is this? Oh, actually is this your mystery man. The one you had under wraps. I mean, I know you had dinner a few times, but I didn't know it had moved forward from that?"

"Well, he's not a mystery man. He's just...different. But I think it's more than just physical attraction now. Though I um…I have to say his English accent is a bonus" She laughs and blushes at the same time. "We have a lot in common, you know, we talk you know about stuff."

They both look around, watching the guys in the command room through the window. Mandy watches Jason, he's sitting with his head in his hands. He looks miles away, deep in thought. She nods Davis towards what she sees "Look at what she does. All this drama she creates, and yet still she's all he thinks about!" she sighs

Davis at him too, she nods "Though, I think she might have burned her bridges this time"

"Who C.J?" Mandy frowns puzzled " Oh, why's that?" Mandy looks puzzled. But she also takes some delight, in hearing all may not be well between CJ and Jason.

Lisa coughs and shuts the office door, just to be sure they're not overheard. She leans in talking quietly "Well…. I spoke with Sonny and ..." she licks her lips ready to spill the gossip "… he reckons they had big fight, earlier today"

"Well…" Mandy smiles " to be fair, they've done that plenty of times before, so that's nothing new."

Uhh uhh! "No, not like this!" she checks the window to make sure the guys are still all out there "No, Sonny reckons that Jason was _really_ tough on her this time. That he ended it, and that he meant it!" she looks at the door she knows she shouldn't really be repeating this "Look, this is between us, right? But …well some guy, he sent Jason a _sex tape_ of her and him, the guys." Lisa raises her eyes "I mean seriously, who does that type of thing?" she pauses "I mean we've all heard the bar rumors, that she's pretty game but still... making a video!? Woah!"

"Who?" Mandy frowns looking embarrassed "Who sent it to Jason?"

"That's the thing, supposedly it's this guy. The one we think's involved with Clay's disappearance. Oh um…" She frowns "I guess you're not up to speed with that yet. It's this um…Reuben guy, I think that was the name I heard them use. Well, he's an English guy... must be something about them huh?" she laughs. "but still even with a hot accent, to that let someone video you. Leave yourself wide open like that. Woah! I mean I know people do that kinda thing but…" She looks at Mandy whose face is like stone. She's quiet and frowning. "Mandy? Are you okay?"

"Yeah um….yeah sure" Mandy drifted off into her own thoughts "You say this is the guy, the one who sent Jason the video?"

"Yeah, well I only know what Sonny told me" she shrugs. Davis is now wondering if she's said too much "Sorry. Sorry, I guess I shouldn't be gossiping like that. Look, I need to get on"

"No!" Mandy frowns "No, it's fine. I'll catch up with you later."

"Oh, and um… Sonny said they had a huge fight after that and Jason's through with her" Davis shrugs and raises her eyebrows "so who knows"

Mandy gulps. Her skin crawls. Not only is she annoyed to be reminded that Reuben slept with C.J. But she panics. Wondering now if he really did delete the videos he had of her. Like the one from Mexico that he promised her faithfully he would delete. She wonders now had he promised C.J the same thing.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Mandy goes out into the corridor to make a call. The number goes straight to voicemail

"Reuben... You need to call me! Urgently. I need to talk with you" She lets out a long breath _Shit!_

She looks around the corridor, trying to calm her nerves. Now she's angry. He told her she was special and that he hadn't done that before. She wonders how many others there were. She feels used and worse still, it's something C.J warned her about.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

C.J makes her excuses to Naima and leaves. She needs to call _Reuben.  
_ She closes her eyes, nervous about the thought of speaking to him. She walks heads down the stairs and out into the street. Taking a deep breath filling her lungs with the fresh air outside.

 _Arrghhh! Fuck!_ She leans against the wall in the side alley, she has tight knot of nerves in her stomach. She can't believe he sent Jason that video. "Shit what do I do now?" she rubs her hand through her hair as she gets herself together. Hailing a cab, she heads back to the motel. She'll make the call from there.

As she arrives at the motel and gets out of the cab she looks across the street at the liquor store. She sighs. It's too much temptation and she crosses the street towards it.

Inside she looks up at the shelf full of whiskey. She puts her hand to the bottle of JD and closes her eyes. Taking a deep breath, she lets go and stands there staring. "Come on Catherine you don't need this!"

She takes a breath and turns back towards the store exit. Then she stops again. _Oh shit!_ "What the hell!" she hurriedly goes back to the shelf, grabs the bottle and heads straight to the cashier.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Back at the Motel, after taking a she sits on the edge of the bed drying herself with the towel.

"Right..." She sighs " c'mon, time to focus! Forget about Jason, Clay's your priority now!

She sits on the bed only wearing a vest top and panties. As she lays back she smiles, thinking about the nights she's spent here with Clay. All those times they made love here, and what happened between them, and now she wonders, hopes, that he's okay.

If there's one thing she knows, from personal experience, it's exactly how he'll be feeling right now. Locked up, not knowing when he's going to be freed. She takes a deep breath. Closing her eyes, the images of her time in Damascus, flood her brain. Filling the deep dark spaces of her mind.

She hits her head with the palm of her hand, trying to rid herself of them. Then she picks up the bottle of JD, hat she placed on the side table. She unscrews the lid and sniffing the contents _Mmmm!_ She sighs as she savors that smell. Then taking a breath she put the lid on and places it back on the side table.

She can't forget about it though. The smell, the taste she knows. It calls to her and she looks at the bottle, unable to resist she picks it up again. Turning it around in her hand, feeling the glass shape, looking at the amber liquid. Imaging the warm taste on her tongue

"Oh What the hell!" She frowns and opens the lid again. Butting the rim of the bottle to her lips, she hesitates for a moment and then she tips it back. _Just to steady my nerves!_ She tells herself

 _Aahhhhh! Uuuggh!_ She gasps, as the fiery liquid burns the back of her throat. She screws up her face and quickly takes another swig, just to wash the first one down _Ahhh!_ "Oh, that's better!"

She pours some into the glass that's stood on the table "Okay now focus" she lets out a breath then takes another quick sip from the glass as she composes the text.

 _Reuben…. you asshole!_ She smiles looking at the words. She takes another sip of the glass and then deletes it. Knowing she can't send it even if she really wants to. _You son of a bitch!_ She sighs. Pushing her hair back from her face, she takes another drink. _Shit!_ She looks at the now empty glass. She sighs again and refills it.

She coughs, composing herself she hits call on the phone. His cell number goes straight to voice mail "Reuben you're a son of a bitch! Why the hell did you do that?" she goes silent, trying not to cry She takes a breath as she pauses for a moment "We need to talk. You know I've got what you want, but I need to see Clay first"

She hangs up choking up with emotions and now she downs the whole glass of JD in one shot  
"Arrghhh! Oh god! jeez "she coughs and splutters as she swallows it. Closing her eyes, she sighs and then again she tops up her glass "Fuck it!... Fuck all of you!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Oh hell! Davis looks at the phone logs running on her screen "C.J…oh my god .. she just made a call" she shouts to the other in the room "Heads up! CJ made a call! He phone...it's not made a call for ages, but it just registered an outgoing call"

"You get a location on the number?" Jason's frowns

"No, can't trace it yet!" Davis frowns "I'm rerunning the search"

"So, who'd she call?"

"I'm tryin to trace that too"

Leaning over Davis's shoulder Mandy thinks she recognizes the number as Reuben's. Taking a breath, she anxiously looks up at the others. For now, until she works out his involvement in this, she decides it's better to not to say anything.

"Davis, you get _any_ trace on that phone yet?"

"Still checking" She frantically stares at the maps on the screen in front of her, watching as the searches run "Okay, okay I've got something, showing the local area. That means she can't be far away" she points on the map. "There!"

"Wait!" She frowns as she stares at the digital map ".. there's nothing in this area...but it's not that far from the bar." She holds her breath while she does a street search "Oh… wait, there's a motel"

"Motel?" Jason looks up "Wait, didn't Clay mention something about a motel. What motel?"

"Um... just here. I'm not gonna be able to get a room number but… it's definitely showing a match here. La Vista Motel. I'll ping you the address"

"Good work!" Jason rubs his head thinking; he's still staring at the screen "You know if she was right and we're not the only ones watching her phone, then if we got her location then you can bet someone else is gonna get it pretty soon too." He takes a deep breath "We got no choice; we have to go get her!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

At the motel reception desk Jason shows the, uninterested, guy behind the security screen a picture of CJ from his phone "You know her? She been stayin' here?"

The guy quickly glances away from the TV and looks at them "Its gonna cost ya for that kinda information" he smiles

"No, why don't you just tell us alright then I won't have to waste my time busting this place apart" Jason sighs staring through the glass at him

 _Hmmm!_ The man just grins at him not moving "And ...why don't I just go back to my TV show?!"

"Look…" Jason sighs ".. just tell me. I need to know, is she staying here ?"

The guy still ignores him, turning back to the TV screen as Jason thumps his hand, hard, on the safety screen "You bust that you'll pay for it!"

"Jay!" Sonny frowns as Jason thumps against it even harder "Hey Jay! Jay… Jason! I got this" Sonny steps up to the glass and taking a fifty dollar note from his wallet he holds it flat against the glass "Now... you gonna answer the man's question or not?"

The guy smiles and now he gives Sonny his attention. Putting his hand under the payment gap in the screen he takes hold of the note. As he does Sonny grabs at his wrist pulling his arm through the slot and bending his hand awkwardly, and painfully, upwards.

 _Aahhhhh! Ahhh! "Hey_ man let go..." He squeals "Let go! I'll tell ya man!"

"Yeah you will. Now.. do you recognise this woman or am I gonna have to keep breaking your fingers one at time?" Sonny takes hold of his smallest finger bending it backwards.

 _Awww!... Fuck fuck!_ " Hey man ... I said I'll tell ya... now let me go!" he looks at the picture again "Yeah...yeah it's the lady with the baby … yeah I remember her now. She err .. she never goes out, never leaves the place. Damn hot looking though, for a mamma .. you know what I mean" he smiles but Sonny just growls at him

"Oh perleasse! Sonny frowns "So she still here?" he bends another of his fingers

 _Awww!_ "Yeah... yeah! Look I shouldn't be tellin you this but.. _Awww fuck man! "_ Yeah she's in apartment Twelve A... it's up on the second floor!" _Awww! Owww! "_ Man let go!"

As Sonny lets his hand go, the TV guy snatches it back through the screen. Holding it against him, trying to stop the pain. Sonny puts the fifty dollars back in his wallet "Thanks…so nice doin business with ya!" he looks at Jason and points to the door "After you!" he smiles

Back outside they look up at rooms, checking the numbers "It's there!" Ray points " That one, on the balcony Twelve A"

"Okay! Ray you stay here with the vehicle, keep eyes on, in case anyone comes. Sonny you're up top with me, give us some over watch at the end of that balcony"

 _Pheww!_ Jason takes a deep breath. He knocks softly on the door of the room numbered 12A "CJ!... CJ it's me, Jason!" he's concerned that she'll not respond to him, not after their argument earlier. He listens. No answer "C.J…open the door. It's not safe for you to stay here, we need to go!"

Still no answer. He sighs taking a deep breath trying to think what to do. Not even sure if she's still here, he tries the door handle. It's locked "Havoc base, this is BRAVO 1, you still got copy on that phone"

"Yeah copy that Bravo 1. The trace is still showing it's there"

Jason takes a breath he looks around at Sonny who's checking over the edge of the balcony. "Sonny...You still got her number on your phone? Call it!"

Sonny takes his cell from his jeans pocket and finds the unregistered number in his call logs. He listens as it dials out "You hear it?"

Jason listens to the door "Yeah...yeah I hear it. That means she's gotta be in there! " He bangs hard on the door again "C.J!….CJ please…you need to open up!"

Unsure how to get her to open up, he squints inside the window. There's a small opening in the curtains that are covering the glass, where they don't close properly, and through it he can see what he thinks is the shape of a person, laying sprawled on the bed. The more he stares the more certain he is she's there. _Oh Fuck!_ "Sonny get here! Somethings wrong, we need to get in there!"

Sonny's beside him and on the count of three, they shove hard, barging against the flimsy door frame. First strike nothing happens but second go the lock snaps and the door flies open.

 _Oh shit!_ They rush to the bed "Not again!"

Sonny gasps at the scene in front of them. Wearing only a vest and her panties, CJ's laid flat on her chest, on top of the bed covers. Her hands sprawled either side of her. She's not moving, even after all the noise from them breaking the door open and there on the bed beside her, is an empty bottle of whiskey.

 _Shit!_ Jason checks for a pulse on her neck. He sighs relieved when he feels the thud of her heart beating against his fingers "Okay, okay she's gotta a pulse!" _Pheww! H_ e lets out the panic he felt. For one moment there he thought he'd lost her "I think she's just passed out!"

Sonny picks up the bottle next to her, looking at it " I wonder why?!" Sonny sniffs, the stench of liquor around her is strong.

"Alright.." Jason frowns ".. let's get her up!" they both take an arm and even though she's out cold they lift her easily "C.J!...CJ, c'mon wake up!" Jason sighs lifting her chin to look at her. _Shit!_

 _Mmmm!_ she moans as they move her

"Well I guess that's a start!"

Sonny shakes his head "Hey CJ …. C'mon you dumb ass! Can you hear me?" she groans again "Yeah, yeah! C'mon on there princess, let's get you up!" Sonny slaps her hard on the cheek "C'mon, wake the fuck up!" He slaps her again a few times until, annoyed, she pushes his hand away "That's it! C'mon...wakey wakey!"

She sighs and groans, then tries to lay down again "No…no no! No, you need to get UP! C'mon up we get Sleepin Beauty"

She suddenly opens her eyes and looks Sonny in the face "Leave me the fuck alone!"

"Yeah right, well see I can't do that, sorry!" Sonny smiles "But that'll do me. Now get the hell up! We need to get outta here " he stands her up, her arm around his shoulder as he balances her unsteady body against him.

 _Fuck!_ Jason swears. He's the other side of the bed and he rubs his hand over his face, thinking what to do with her. "You know Sonny, this is my fault. I shouldn't have been so hard on her earlier"

"Hey c'mon Jace… this is not your fault. Jason, you listenin, this is not your fault!"

"Yeah but this could have been a repeat of last time. She could've … you know"

"But she didn't right. She's just drunk! She'll be fine. Jace, she's gonna be fine" Sonny sighs as Jason stares at her "Jason focus. We need ta sober her up and get the hell out"

"Alright, yeah you're right.." Jason gathers up her things, not that there's much of anything there.

"Tell ya what .. let's dunk her in a cold tub! That should sober her up pretty darn quick!" Sonny smiles, relishing the thought of doing it.

"Bravo 1 this is Bravo 2, yeah we got unknown tangos arrivin. Black SUV just pulled in the parking lot."

"Okay, copy that. Bravo 2 bring the truck around back, we'll make exfil from there" He takes a breath quickly gathering up her clothes "Sonny forget the tub we don't have time. We got company, we gotta go"

"Jeezz woman…" Sonny sighs as he throws her body over his shoulder and makes for the door. "You smell like you bathed in a bottle of whiskey"

"Sonny…" she groans

"You know what, just shut the hell up CJ I aint got time for your bullshit right now!"

"Sonny no..… Sonny I'm gonna be sick" She makes this retching noise in the back of her throat and he immediately throws her back on the bed, regretting tipping he upside down in the way that he did "Ta hell you are, not on me anyway"

Sitting there she leans forward her head between her knees as she retches again

"CJ, why the hells nothin ever simple with you" he stares at her swaying where she sits "Take deep breaths"

"Havoc base this is bravo one, can you get eyes on a black SUV at our location"

"Bravo 1 this is havoc working on it now!"

"Havoc keep tabs on that vehicle. It might lead us to Spenser's location We're headed back now One out!

"Copy that "

Apart from their side arms they don't have any other weapons and other than starting a fire fight in the street they need to get out of here

"We need to hurry!" Jason rubs his head looking at CJ as she sits on the bed "God damn you're nothing but a pain in the ass. All right come on we gotta go"

"BRAVO 1 we got company for sure. Won't be long before they have the room number" Ray watches as the three men go into the motel reception.

"Alright there's a side street that runs from the ally on the fire escape. bring the truck around We'll meet you there. C'mon Sonny, bring her, we need to go !"

"Great! Don't you even think about bein' sick on me princess…" he frowns, hitching her up onto his shoulder again and they head out from the room towards the backfire escape . As they exit the doorway Sonny hears a _thud_.

 _Aww Fuck!_ She cries out. Sonny closes his eyes grimacing, realizing he's managed to catch her head on the doorway. Hitting it on the edge of the door frame.

"Ooo shit!… I'm sorry!" He smiles, and as she groans and swears at him, he and Jason start to laugh.

Jason checks the front of her head. There's a considerable lump, it's cut but not bleeding too much. "She'll live!" Jason laughs

"Well can only but hope it might knock some sense into her. With any luck."

"Huh" Jason frowns "Doubt there's any chance of that" They run down the back-fire exit and Ray has the truck waiting. They throw her in the back as Ray speeds them away.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Yeah it's me" the English voice on the end of the call "She's gone!" he looks at the broken door frame "Looks like someone got here before us. We've searched but there's nothing here"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They drive to the naval base, speeding through security to the rear parking lot. It's the only safe location they can go to for now.

CJs laid on the rear seat of the truck and after stopping once for her to throw up she's now fast asleep. Ray checks on her, Sonny having forced him to be the one to sit in the back next to her.

She's up on her feet as they arrive back to the command room and Sonny gestures her to sit on the corner seating area. She holds he head and immediately lays down

"Best you take a look at her!" Jason sighs and Trent does as he's asked. Checking her over, taking her pulse and shining a light in her eyes, which makes her swear at him "Looks like she's okay, just very drunk!"

"We had to stop as she threw up on the way back!"

"Well guess that can only help. I'll keep an eye on her. But she seems to be sobering up some. I'm just gonna put a dressing on that cut, she has on her head"

"Yeah .. "Sonny smiles "Not sure how she did that" he laughs

Jason sighs as he checks on her, thinking how much of a mess she looks. She sits up, resting her head in her hands as she looks at him staring at her "Oh just get the hell away from me!" she moans

"Fine!" he sighs "Fine, I'll do that!" .

"Oh… Jason" She sighs disappointed as he does, walk away from her "Jason…wait! I'm sorry I didn't' mean it" she frowns as she watches him leave

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

CJs phone starts to ring. It's in among her belongings which are sat beside Davis on the table where she's working. "Jason …" she holds it up "It's CJs"

Davis frowns, handing the phone to him. He stares at the screen but doesn't answer the call and it rings off. "Can we trace this?"

"Um… I can try"

While he continues holding it a notice it indicates a video message has arrived. Hesitantly he opens it. "Oh my god! " He gasps, putting his hand to his head. His eyes glued watching, it's a video of Clay.

Sonny stares over his shoulder "What the hell! Is that Clay?"

"Uh huh!" Jason nods, unable to stop watching, his gut lurches, churning over at the content. Someone beating on Clay's face and then a hand takes a knife, making a cut mark across his chest, Clay in pain pulling at the restraints on his hands.

He reads the message that accompanies the video. _Getting bored of waiting now, Catherine! So is Mr Spenser._

"Jesus Christ!" Sonny's fuming "Jason, we need to get after these sons bitches!"

The phone rings again. Jason takes a breath, trying to calm the surge in his anger. Again, he lets it ring off, while he thinks about what he should do. Then taking the phone over to CJ, he thrusts it against her.

She's sitting wrapped in a blanket that Trent got for her. She was cold, because, other than Jason's jacket he put around her, she's still only wearing the vest and panties that she had on in the motel room.

"What?" She sighs looking up at him, rubbing her head "Jason…" She sneers at him. She can see the look of anger on his face. "Jason.. what's wrong?"

He doesn't answer, and she frowns watching as he walks over to the small refrigerator in the corner of the room. He takes out a fresh bottled water. Pausing a moment, he undoes the lid and takes just a small sip and then, without any warning, he's beside her and he throws the blanket off her onto the floor as he proceeds to empty the entire bottle of cold water over her head.

 _FUCK!_ She screams out as she jumps up from the seat in shock. Her breath involuntarily forces in backwards _Ohhh Fuck!_ She breaths desperately fast "What the fuck! Jason.. what the hell did you do that for?" she gasps shocked by how cold the water was and she wasn't expecting it. Her body shivers as the cold water runs down her back. She pulls her hand through her hair wiping the wet from her face as she tries to clean up.

Davis smirks and looks at Sonny, who's laughing to himself. Ray's standing next to them with his arms folded as he shakes his head trying to stifle a smile. _If Jason wanted to piss her off, he's certainly going the right way about it._ He laughs.

"That cell phone…" Jason glare at her, his patience finally worn out "..it rings again, you answer it ! You understand me? And you better be sober when it does!"

She looks up at him from where she sitting, eyes locked on each other, just staring. She shivers again, trying to not to get angry. However, inside she's raging with him, for humiliating her like that. Doing that to her.

Davis is now back from the stores. She's brought CJ a towel, some Khaki combat pants and a large green sweatshirt. Sonny throws the towel and clothes at her. "Get cleaned up!"

She frowns at him, angrily as she dries her face and legs Then she pulls the combat pants on. Before she put the sweatshirt on she decides to remove her soaking wet vest top. Pulling it up over her body

"CJ wait! " Jason sighs as he realizes she's not wearing anything underneath "Jeez just wait!" He turns his back to her, his body shielding her from the rest of BRAVO as she undresses herself .

The guys all cough awkwardly and look away. Davis shaking her head about how brazen she is. Then, dressed, she sits down, just as the phone starts to ring again.

She looks up asking permission from Jason just before she answers it. She doesn't speak at first but, immediately an English voice does "Aahhhhh! Catherine, finally you're answering. Where are you?"

"Reuben…" She takes a deep breath "…what do you want?"

"Oh… I thought you wanted to talk?"

"No! No, I wanna see Clay" She's careful with her words but still nervous "I wanna see Clay's alive"

"I sent you a video of him. That will have to be sufficient for now."

Unsure about what he says she looks to Jason to confirm. He nods " It's not enough. I need to see for myself. I need to see him, in person"

"Catherine…" He laughs "I don't know what game you're playing but you know that's not possible . Come on Catherine don't play games you know how these things work"

"If I don't, see him, Then I'm gonna destroy the…" she doesn't finish her sentence as she hesitates. She's thinking as she sits there, silent.

Jason looks at her confused he keeps willing her to speak but she still doesn't, she doesn't because she's still thinking. " _C.J!"_ Jason prompts her through gritted teeth to do something.

"Catherine?" Reubens also curious as to why she's gone silent " Catherine, are you still there?"

"Reuben …" She coughs "Reuben, you want that file and I want to see Clay. There's no negotiating on that."

She stops talking again, He keeps hesitating because something bothering her " Why do you want this file so much?" She puts he hand to her head rubbing it, desperately trying to think. About why he would want it enough, that he'd go to all this trouble

"Oh my god…" she smiles as something suddenly dawns on her "I know…I know what it is. Why you want it. Your name is on there, on the list. Huh!" she laughs curiously " What did you do Reuben? What secret are you hiding that you need to make disappear?"

Jason's worried. He doesn't understand what she's doing, and he looks at Mandy "What the hells she playing at?"

Reuben hesitant, laughs. For the first time shes the one making him nervous "Well I knew you were smart. I didn't realise how smart until now. Huh! He laughs again  
"You've managed to open it haven't you? The file you know the passcodes" he coughs anxiously "Well that's either very resourceful or very dumb of you. But then if you really have managed to open it. My life just got easier"

He pauses, waiting "Should I also remind you Catherine.. that your name is also on there"

"Yeah" She laughs "Yeah, I know. But I also know after what you did, sending Jason that video, that I've got nothing to lose now. Can you say the same think?"

He sighs. Somehow she's managed to back him into a corner, and he coughs before, angrily, he answers her "Wait at the Nova park . I'll send someone to pick you up. Oh… and don't do anything stupid and go alone!

She looks over at Jason "When?" she takes a deep breath

"In…two hours"

The phone goes dead and CJ lets out a long sigh as she pushes her wet hair back from her face _Pheww!_ She's shaking and takes a deep breath as Jason looks at her. She stares back but for a moment neither of them say anything.

"What did he mean.." Jason frowns at her " when he said _your name is on that list_?" he stares at her and she looks away. "CJ ? Why would your name be on there? What have you done?"

"Jason .. " She shakes her head , her eyes pitifully pleading with him "Jason don't ask. Look, it doesn't matter. It's not important. What's important is that his name is! " she breaths slowly and deeply staying in control, staying composed Her stomach turns over and she thinks she still might throw up "The fact that is, is enough to keep Clay alive for now!" she sigh "I need to get ready to go"

o-o-o-o-o-o


	38. Chapter 38

**This is not what I need today.**

Clay wakes. He's slept for a while, well more a dazed unconscious fog than what could be called proper sleep. He was in a hellish amount of pain and still is

 _Awww!_ He groans at the burning on his chest. The pain from the knife wound is horrendous. Closing his eyes, he takes long deliberate breaths of air as he waits for the wave of pain to subside. _Still at least the bleeding has stopped_ He thinks as he looks at the blood-soaked dressing they put on it. Really though it's just a square of gauze. It's stuck to the wound and he will have to leave it on there for now as the pain was already bad enough without trying to remove that.

His face aches and due to the swelling he can't see well from his right eye. His ribs hurt, they hurt a lot! Painful to touch and they ache there are bruises all over but he's not sure if they might be broken or not.

He closes his eyes thinking how much he longs for a bath, his bed and a proper night's sleep and as he lays against the old mattress he has on the floor, he's wondering where BRAVO are and when will they come get him. For one thing he does know is that they will all he didn't know is how long it would be of if he'd be alive when they did.

The door opens and once again the bright light from the outside floods in. He closes his eyes  
Firstly because it hurts his head going from total dark to the brightness and secondly because he's hoping he doesn't have to muster the energy to fight the pain once again.

"Mr Spenser and how are we today?" He hears a laugh and then can see the shadow of someone standing over him "Oh no!" The voice chuckles "That wound looks very nasty!"

"I don't know where she is…..I've told you!" Clay sighs, trying to counter another interrogation

"Yes, I know that!" The voice smiles "But…that doesn't matter. We already know where she is"

Clay's worried as the English voice nods to the large burly looking guys with him and they man handle him up off of the mattress.

He tries to resist. _Why are they doing this if they have their information now?_ He fights and struggles with what little energy he has left, but he knows, even at his full strength it would be hard to get the two of them off, but here now when he has no energy he's unable to resist anything.

They wrestle him back into the chair and zip tied his hands and feet tight to it "We need to get you looking nice and pretty because… Mr Spenser you're going to have some company…very soon!"

"What?!" Clay's confused "What company, what do you mean? Who?"

"Oh, don't worry I'm sure she'll still be pleased to see you. Even if you look like you haven't made an effort"

"No wait!" he doesn't want them to close the door. He didn't want to be in the dark again. In his confused mind the darkness only made everything seem worse. It made him only focus on the pain and if he was honest, the darkness frightened him.

The door banged shut and he sat there, and he was worried about what was going to happen.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

C.J's stopped being sick. She's been to the bathroom and cleaned up. Davis found her some better fitting clothes and now, she's starting to feel like herself again, but _Oh my God! Does my head hurt!_

Trent sees her as he comes out of the men's bathroom "Ahh! I've been looking for you" he sighs he has news and he knows she's not going to like it.

She rolls her eyes; his tone doesn't bode well "Oh Great! Well here I am! So, what is it?"

"Um… look you're not going to like this but um... they want me to send you with a tracker!"

"Oh great!" She lets out a long sigh and closes her eyes "Yeah that's just what I need today"

"C'mon" Trent smiles at her putting his arm around her shoulder

"What now? I mean I was just gonna..."

"Yes now! We haven't got long before you leave" he registers the look on her face "I've got us set up in a room down the corridor"

"Can I not just get a drink and something to eat first?"

"No!" He sighs "Look CJ, c'mon let's just get it done. You know neither of us wanna piss Jason off any more than we have to, right now!"

She sighs. She was going to protest more, but it seems unworthy of the energy it would take and Trent's right, pissing Jason off now is not a good idea.  
She sighs. All she can think is how much the last one hurt like hell when he put it in, so she isn't too keen to do it again. But she's also thinking about Spenser and wondering how he must be feeling.

"I don't know the point?" she sighs "They're pretty useless most of the time" she shrugs "and the battery life is shit" she shakes her head She carries on talking trying anything to put it off but Trent has his orders and he loads the RFID chip into the syringe. There's no way he's not doing this now since Jason told him to.

"Oh god!" She sighs "Just tell me, why the hell do the needles have to be so big" it was the size of them that concerned her most. Not that he'd ever had one, and he has to admit he'd be seriously trying to get out of it too from looking at that syringe.

"No, that needles not the finest thing in the world, you're right " Trent's nearly as apprehensive doing this as she is. He remembers last time how much she swore at him, how he only just ducked when she swung a punch "I told you before though, it has to be let the chip come out. Look um….do you want me to try the back of your neck this time? The skin's a bit more supple there, but it's still hidden so might not be so sore? I'm not going to promise it will hurt less but we could try it?"

"Whatever!" she shrugs "We both know if Jason says this is gonna happen, it's gonna happen so I've got no choice! You know I think he's only doing this out of spite!"

Trent laughs but it did cross his mind too "Right, lie down on your front. You'll be more relaxed and that should make it easier"

She's laid on her chest on the bed but she's not sure about the relaxed part. She lifts her hair out the way. The needle pierces her skin. "Fuuuuuckkk!" she squeals and flinches

"CJ, you really do have to keep still now!"

"Yeah you wanna try keeping still. Let me shove that in you!" She threatens him and he laughs as she screws her eyes tight shut to the pain. _Owww! Fuck!_ "God that hurts Trent. You said that would be better. Just hurry up"

"Sorry only a minute more. Can't rush it don't want to damage the chip"

She grimaces a bit more "Jeez! fuckin Christ" then comes the sting as the chip leaves the needle and enters her neck she sucks in air then as he pulls the needle out _Fuck!_

"All done!" Trent cleans her neck with a surgical wipe holding it till it stops bleeding

"I'll _all done_ you in a minute" she goes to rub it

"Leave it you'll make it sore"

"It's sore already you….. Oh god! You said that would be better. I'll tell you for future reference… it's not!" She twists her neck a few times to take the ache out. She's moaning a lot and he can hear her tension. He senses there is more to it than just being about the tracker

"CJ are you okay?" he frowns looking at her.

"Fuck off! " she takes a deep breath "You got something to take the edge off this pain?" she doesn't remember the last one hurting quite this much.

"No!" He laughs he's not sure if she's being serious. He smiles at her it's the first bit of kindness she's experienced in a while and she relaxes.

"Sorry!" she smiles "I know it's not your fault …just you know. I'm stressed about Clay and everything"

"I know, we all are" he puts his hand on hers

"I hope he's holding up okay! I know…. Well I know how much something like this can mess with your head" She's thinking how even though she's never really spoken of it

And though Trent's easy to talk to, she can't even tell him even if he's always been the one to care for her when she really needed it. It's funny to think he knows just about everything about her and he certainly knows nearly every inch of her body by now.

"Is that what all the drinking's about? Stuff messing with your head?" He sighs but she doesn't look at him. "C.J …" he tries to get her to engage with him "Do you wanna speak about it? Anything you can tell me, you know that. It won't go any further!"

"Yeah right!" she smiles "And about what anyway?"

"The drinking? You know there's things out there that can help you, to stop. If you want to. "

"Oh, here we go" she sighs "some lecture from Jason, part two!" she pulls a face "So what's he asked you to have a word with me about now?"

Trent looks at her, he smiles, she's right Jason did ask him to speak with her but. "Okay you got me but seriously CJ have you thought about taking something to help?"

She laughs shakes her head "I don't need any help with _the_ _drinking_ "

"C.J" he looks at her "this is me you're talking to, not Jason!"

She bites her lip she doesn't want to have this conversation. She wants to protest that it's _bullshit,_ but she can't. She knows deep down that her drinking has gotten out of control recently "So what're you saying? That I just take something, and like magic I stop drinking?" she laughs "C'mon Trent, you can't tell me something works just like that?"

"No …but you could try these tablets" he takes a box out of the drawer in the desk where he's sitting "They um…help, take the cravings away. You can't drink with them though, if you do well... it's not pleasant! Compare it to a nice bout of food poisoning!" he smiles.

"Oh yeah…that sounds great! You know what, I'll take two boxes!" she rolls her eyes

"CJ I'm being serious; a lot of alcoholics use them to help break the habit"

"Alcoholic!" she laugh "Seriously Trent… you think…" She shakes her head "You know, I'm not an alcoholic. Is this Jason putting words in your mouth?" she rolls her eyes again  
"You know I just like a drink now and again….. If you hadn't noticed things have been quite…well stressful lately. So, tell Jason to keep his damn nose out of my business. He made his feelings _quite_ clear yesterday, so he has no right.. to tell me what to do anymore and you tell him that!"

Trent sighs her attitude annoys him. He wants to help her so much "Well whether you like the word or not and you can deny it to me all you want... but that's what you are!" he doesn't mince his words as he stares at her "and that's not Jason's words... that's my medical opinion"

"No thanks!" She sighs out loud, so that he registers her annoyance and she gets up puts her jacket on and heads to the door "Trent, keep your tablets and your advice, give them to someone who gives a damn!"

"C.J" he shakes his head; he stands up trying to stop her leaving. "You know what I give up… but if you're not careful …and don't do something, really soon you're gonna lose everything"

She smiles at him as she runs her hands through her hair and down the back of her neck where the tracker is _Ouch!_ she catches the spot with her hand "Are we done?"

"That's up to you" Trent shrugs "CJ…I'll help if you want…. "

before he finishes his sentence she walks out of the door and let's it slam behind her. Trent shakes his head he really actually likes her. He feels sorry for her, at times, but _God she can be damn annoying!_

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason's in the corridor, he's waiting, loitering. He shouldn't be there, and he really shouldn't care. He knows that, but for some reason it's hard, hard for him not to care "So, how'd it go?"

"What?" she sighs "The tracker? Yeah that went fine! It's done." She carries on walking, trying to ignore him.

He turns around in the hallway watching her as she walks away. "Did Trent speak to you ….about the tablets?"

She stops where she is and lets out a long sigh. _Here we go!_ she bites her lip before answering wonder if she should just ignore him, but she won't "Yeah…yeah he did!"

"And?" he stands with his arms folded staring at her

"And what?" she laughs " Oh god…. I told him give them to someone who gives a shit!"

He shakes his head in frustration he really thought she might listen to Trent. "CJ… why can't you just try? If not for me … then for your son!"

"Oh… oh, don't you dare do that" she turns back on him _Shit!_ "You know … one more thing" she's furious now "don't interfere in my life anymore. I need your help and I'll ask for it. I think, you made it perfectly clear yesterday where I stand with you"

She turns to leave but then stops coming back at him a second time . "You know what I'm fed up with you trying to control me" she glares at him and though he doesn't react she continues "and also when we this is done and we get Clay, then I'm coming back for _my_ son and there's nothing you can do about it. So, make all the threats you want Jason, you don't scare me!"

Jason's about to retaliate when Mandy comes out of her office. She's heard their confrontation down the corridor "Is everything okay here?"

"Yeah…yeah sure." Jason nods

CJ's annoyed, she really doesn't like Mandy and now it's obvious by her tone as she addresses her "Oh yeah…everything's just fine and none of _your_ damn business, either"

"You know… I think he's just trying to help you" she calls after her as she walks away. It stops CJ where she is. It's one thing Jason to lecture her but another thing entirely for Mandy to talk to her like this and she's fed up with being lectured today.

"WOW! You are just so desperate to get in his pants aren't you" she laughs "Well you now what… you're welcome to him. He's all yours!" she starts to move away but comes back "Oh and a word of caution Jason..." she smiles "I'd check that she hasn't got any videos lurking on Reubens phone!"

As CJ walks away he looks at Mandy and she has a horrified look on her face "You know you really are a nasty bitch" she angrily calls after her

C.J stands still, and she laughs. Then she mad and she walks back, and inches from Mandy's face "Fine! So, you tell him… honestly. That you made no video with Reuben? Go on tell him" she laughs "You can't can you!"

Mandy's gone quiet and gulps "I have no idea what she's talking about"

"You're a liar" CJ laughs "But you keep telling yourself that! What did he tell you he deletes them because _a gentleman keeps his word_! Oh wow! If I had dollar every time I've heard him say that" she smiles at Mandy "You can stop taking the moral high ground now!"

Mandy doesn't know what suddenly comes over her, but she slaps C.J hard in the face and though it catches C.J off guard she still laughs "Oh _really!"_ She rubs her cheek and then her smile drops, she's fuming with anger "Oh…you know what….I'll let that one go but…"

"But what? Look at you.." Mandy stares sneering at her " I'm surprised you're even sober."

C.J's so frustrated and angry, all the stress of today, about Clay it's now boiling over as she faces Mandy.

Ray and Sonny appear in the corridor alerted by all the voices shouting. Ray watches them and as CJ takes another step forward _Oh shit!_ He sighs then anticipating what's about to happen he runs down the hallway and pushes CJ back just as she raises her fist to Mandy "Woaah! Woaah! Woaah! CJ….just calm down!"

Ray's holding her with one hand, pinned against the wall while he checks what's going on he can't believe that Jason has let it escalate between them.

She's grapples with Ray trying to make him let her go but now as well as Ray, Sonny steps in shoving her back  
"You need to calm the fuck down!" he takes his hat off, running his hand through his hair, before he puts it back on

"Oh!..." CJ laughs "I'm confused. Why am I the one taking the shit for this?"

"Jason…what the fuck is going on here?" Sonny shakes his head and frowns staring at him "You know this needs to stop! We need to concentrate on getting Clay back not this… bullshit!"

Tensions are boiling over between them as Ray still holds her Ray is still holding her against the wall "Hey… are you going to calm down?"

"Ray get the _fuck_ off me!"

"No! Not until you calm down" Ray knows if he lets her go she'll probably knock seven shades of hell out of Mandy the temper she's in.

He still won't let her go just yet and she puts her head back against the wall, closing her eyes while she tries to calm herself. Everything today has built up to this moment and Mandy just set her off.

She pulls her ponytail tight with both hands and shakes the tension out of her neck then puts her hands up "I'm fine. I'm Calm. Let go of me!" she looks at Ray he really does have this way of calming these things down and he eases off, he can feel a calm come over her but not enough to let go of her just yet.

Blackburn strides down the corridor after hearing all the noise "What the _HELL_ is going on here?"

"Nothing " Jason sighs as he's finally shaken for his daze like trance, taken charge of the situation "Eric, everyone's fine …there's no problem, right?"

"Jason _YOU_ have a member of your team missing _, if_ you care to remember that! We need find him and bring him home safe. That _is_ the priority" Blackburn yells at them all "Do you understand me!"

Jason sighs, he's not quite sure how this got out of control, so quickly. "He's right. Clay.. Clay is priority. Clean this mess up and let's go find him!" Jason stares at Mandy then over at CJ just before he storms off.

Ray eases off, releasing her slowly but as she smooth he hair she now finds she has Blackburn in her face  
"And as for _you…"_ he looks, staring C.J in the eye "..you, are only here under licence at _my_ authorisation. So, if you can't behave, then I'll have you escorted off. Am I being clear?"

She doesn't look at him "Oh yeah .. I mean it's not like you need my help or anything, is it!"

Ray looks at her and shakes his head she just can't keep her smart mouth shut. But right now, it doesn't matter what she says Blackburn is not taking any of her attitude "I said _ARE_ ... _WE_... CLEAR?" he's inches from her face as he shouts at her.

"Oh…crystal!" she sneers

"Right so all this bullshit stops _NOW!_ " he sighs. "Let's _concentrate_ on getting Spenser back" he looks round at them all "Right….let's get this done, people!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sitting on the road parked about a block down from the meet point CJ gets out of the truck and walks towards the small park. It has a road on one side of the children's play area but no other access really.

She bored, having wandered around for nearly forty-five minutes. She checks her watch "They're not coming" she sighs, talking to herself

"Just hold out" Jason answers her over the comms

"This is stupid" She sighs again "they're not coming. I'm calling it!"

"CJ to hell you will… you're not in charge anymore" Her reminds her "Just wait, we'll give it to the hour then _I'll_ call it" He cuts off comms and looks at Ray "Something must have spooked them"

She cuts her comms link "Oh, you're such an asshole Jason!.. _Y _ou're not in charge C.J!__ " she rubs her head talking to herself as she checks her phone. Nothing. _Hmmm!_ Well, I'd have called it by now!" She lets out another long sigh as she debates whether to call Reuben herself, or not as she stands there a text comes through.

 _Ditch the bodyguards and walk down the street toward the bank_

Looking around to see if she can spot anywhere that it might have come from and also which bank and where she has to go. She looks back to where she thinks BRAVO are still waiting

"What's she doing?" Jason frowns as they watch her from the truck "She's up to something" he's watching her intently through the windshield glass "Sonny keep an eye on her"

Sonny jumps out of the truck and starts to casually wander towards the park. "She's looking at her phone"

"Davis this is BRAVO 1, CJ got any calls come in?"

"No. No calls … oh wait… I think maybe a text?"

 _Shit!_ "She's up to something, I know it…CJ you hear me? I'm calling it now. Come back"

"Say again?" she smiles ignoring him/

"I said … I'm calling it. They're not coming now "

she looks around and starts walking down the street toward them.

"It's okay Sonny, she's coming back, make your way back as well"

Sonny turns around and starts heading back but notices C.J is now going the other way "What the fuck she up to now! She's walking the wrong way"

"C.J can you hear me? You need to come back ASAP, copy" Jason frowns

Sonny spots the liquor store across the street "Uh oh Jason I think we got a problem… I think I know where she's going!" He gets back in the truck and points out the store

"Oh for fuck sake!" Jason sighs " Follow her!"

As they drive towards the liquor store they miss the black SUV that pulls alongside her. Two guys jump out in front of her, throwing a large grey blanket over her head before shoving her in the back of the SUV and driving off.

Jason looks around the street "Where the fuck did she go Sonny?"

"I don't know she was right there a minute ago?" his head swivels around as he looks for her. They weren't paying attention they thought she was she was going to the liquor store to buy drink. They pull up outside and Sonny jumps out and checking the isles of the store

"Nothing!" he shakes his head

 _Shit!_ Jason bangs his hand on the steering wheel "Davis you got anything your end."

"No… but I'm working on it"

"We're coming back to base"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

CJ heavily on her arm as she gets dumped to the ground with a heavy thud _Arrgghhhh!_ She cries out at the pain in her shoulder _Ahh shit!... God that hurts_!

They pull the blanket off her and she blinks in the brightness of the daylight. Her hands zip tied behind her back after she scratched at one of the guys. He's rubbing his face, swearing about her. They pull her up to a standing position.

She's trying to work out where she is. Looking around it looks like an old warehouse and she calculates that they must have travelled nearly an hour from the park

This is a large empty storage space and it has offices in a row near the back wall. She takes a breath as she wonders if that's where they're holding Clay. This is not the kind of place where your screams would be heard.

She looks around at the sound of footsteps and takes a breath as Reuben strides across the open space, towards her. He smiles at her "Catherine, how are you?"

Her heart sinks. "I'm fine. I just need to see Clay!"

"Oh, what no pleasantries? I trust you're well?" he pushes her hair back from her face and puts his hand on her neck softly rubbing the back of it and her cheek.

She panics, pulling away from his touch, she's afraid that he might feel the tracker at the back of her neck.

 _Hmmm!_ he smiles "At least you're a bit more coherent than the last time I had the pleasure of your company" He's close up to the side of her face and then pulls her earpiece out. He holds it close to his mouth and speaks, he's well aware that Bravo, the base and Jason can hear him.

"You know we could … always do a remake of that video" he laughs "Could be so much better with you sober" he smiles "You're always much too needy, when you're drunk. I like it when you're much more in control!" He throws the comms radio on the floor and stamps on it "Have you got what I want?"

"No!" she sighs "Not on me. .. What you seriously think I'd bring it with me? No, not until I know Clay's alive?"

"Search her!"

She sighs. "Oh c'mon… what's the point Reuben. I know how this works I'm going to be stupid enough"

"I said search her! I don't trust you Catherine!"

The others English guy with Reuben smiles at her "Oh, this will be my pleasure" He puts his hands on her, slowly touching her all over. She closes her eyes, blocking him out. This is more for Reubens pleasure, him watching as someone touches her, more than its about searching her for something he knows she hasn't got. "There's nothing on her!"

"I told you that!"

He turns her round and starts again at the front. His hands on her breasts, she swallows nervously as she looks at Reuben It's slow and uncomfortable, but he continues under Reubens watchful gaze. She closes her eyes again not looking at either of them "She's clean?".

"So Where is it?"

"Where's Clay first?"

"All in good time. I want my file and…."

"and .. you'll get it when I get Clay"

She thinks the other English guy is familiar but can't place him and Reuben sees her looking  
"Oh…yes I'm sorry, did I not introduce you? This is _Mark_ _Reagan_ …..I don't think you've met but I think you'll remember his brother"

 _Oh shit!_ She swallows nervously and then it comes out of nowhere. A massive punch to the ribs. _Ahh fucccckkk!_

She doubles in half falling to the ground. "That's for my brother, you bitch!"

She can't get her breath, she chokes coughing. Tears well in her eyes as she closes them. He kicks with his boot next

 _Aarrrghhhh! Shiiiittt!_ She falls sideways and she can't move, her hands still tied behind her back. She's trying to breath and she's anxious where her ribs never healed properly that something may be broken again _SHIT!_ She screams as the pain seeps through her body.

"I.. want… that file!"

she can just about make out Reuben over the thoughts of pain filling her head. She nods. "Yeah…yeah….I can…I can get it. I just want Clay and … you can have it"

"That's the problem, though isn't it! Because I know _YOU,…_ don't actually have it, do you?"

"What? Yeah….yeah of course I do. Why wouldn't I?" she's trying to think what he means, but he pain is clouding her thoughts

"No see I don't believe you" he turns around. He nods and Reagan pulls her to standing. She's in severe pain now.

 _Arrggghh!_ "Let me go!"

"Sorry…. but a little bird of mine she tells me that Master Chief Hayes has the file now"

"Who? Who told you that, it's not true I've got it?"

"Isn't it funny the amount someone opens up after a bottle of champagne" he smiles "Oh true it did have a little kick to it you know to loosen her up" Reuben smiles and then nods again

Reagan reacts to the nod from Reuben and hits Catherine again in the side _Shitttt!_ "Reuben please!"

"Did you know she asked for my help. Told me she had this friend who had a computer file that he couldn't open, and did I have people that could do it. I was this .. close to getting it. But you know him, he doesn't trust anyone" he laughs "Anyway I figured a little extra incentive to hand it over was what was required. And here we are" he looks around with his hands in the air "You're new home for a while

He nods to the other guys in the room they open up the door to the left she can see its dark inside.

"I believe you wanted to see Mr Spenser. So how rude of me not to let you see him.

 _Arrrrghhhhh!_ she groans _Fuccck!_ She cries as they pick her up again, the pain ripping through her body.

"Why don't you have a little time together" he nods to Regan and the other men "Cut him free"

"No!" She screams as they drag her to the room "No!...No, Reuben...please I'll get the file. Let me go!" As she stares inside the open doorway to the darkened room. she panics and all vision and horrors of being held in Damascus flash in front of her. "I'll get it! I will... Jason will give it to me. Reuben... I promise" she begs him "Just let me go and I'll get it "

Reuben smiles it's the first time he can recall seeing her scared of something. He likes the feeling of control it gives him.

She digs her feet in trying to stop them moving her and then she head butts one of the guys dragging her. _Arrghhh!_ "You Bitch!"

Mark smacks her hard in the face and takes out his knife. She shakes her head panicked but he only uses it to cut the plastic ties around her hands and then he shoves her in the room and slams the door shut on her

She crawls back, clawing desperately at the door, banging her fists against it " _NO!_ Reuben. ..please don't do this!" It's to no avail and she slumps down on the floor. She's crying in pain as she takes deep breaths, sitting with her back to the closed door.

When she opens her eyes, they have adjusted to the minimal light that's coming from under the edge of the door and she becomes aware she's not alone. For a moment she panics wondering who's here. "Clay…Clay is that you?"

She can just about see the lone figure, sitting on the chair. She gets herself together, holding her side as she moves _Oh God! Shit!_ She can hardly move from the pain. Her ribs are hurting so bad and she's struggling for breath "Clay …? "

"C.J?" he frowns as he calls out

"Oh my God …..Clay!" she smiles as she manages to find him in the darkness "Oh god are you okay?"

Her breathing is erratic as she puts her hand on him. She's trying to calm herself but in the dark every emotion is heightened and it's not easy. _Oh Jeez!_ she breaths slowly.

Her eyes are adjusting to the dim light in the small room and now she can see him, he looks in a bad way "It's okay…Clay…they're gonna come for us! Jason will come for us. We're gonna be alright.. I promise"

She brushes her hands over his badly beaten face and then places her lips against his and gently kisses him she sighs grimacing. She's in so much pain again now.

"CJ are you okay?"

"Yeah… yeah I'm okay!" she lies as she slumps down beside his legs holding her hand around his thigh then she puts her hand on her ribs and holds them. Her breathing is labored. She rests her head against his knee. She wishes she could get them out of here.

She sighs, she can feel Clay's hand gently stroking her hair and she closes her eyes. It's so nice right now. She keeps her eyes shut just enjoying these few moments of peace. Then she helps him up from the chair. Both of them slumping against the old mattress on the floor. Clay's laid on his back and she leans against him trying to find a comfortable position to lay next to him.

Resigned now to the fact, that she's going to be staying here for a while and then she lets out a long sigh and closes her eyes. she rubs her hand on her neck trying to release some tension as her hand smooths the skin of her neck, she can feel the lump from the tracker chip and she gently runs her fingers over it. She hopes it's working, and that BRAVO come for them, and soon.

.


	39. Chapter 39

**Chapter 39: Fix this fast**

C.J rubs her face as she starts to wake. She doesn't remember when she fell asleep and she definitely doesn't have any idea how long shes slept. With no concept of the time in the dark room she's lost any bearing to the outside world. What she does know is that when she moves it hurts like hell. She feels really disorientated.

 _Arrgghhh!_ She groans as she tries to sit up. Her breathing's difficult it's hard to get air in her lungs and it takes extreme effort to move around

"Hey, are you okay?" comes a voice in the darkness. For just a moment in her confused pain filled brain she doesn't recognize it. Then it comes to her Clay! "Hey" she smiles "No, not really. How about you?"

"Not great" Clay laughs. It's all he can do in this situation. She can just about make him out in the darkness, aided only by the tiny amount of light from under the door. As she wake properly he eyes once again adjust to the dark.

As she turns to look at him a sharp pain shoots through her body _Aww!... SHIT!_

"Just move slowly" Clay reassures her as he also tries to sit himself up. "What a great pair we are!" he laughs again

"What are you laughing at?" she frowns angrily at first. The pain clouding her mind "There's nothing funny about this" she groans again adjusting her position on the mattress

"No, I know..." he sighs now, worn out by his ordeal. He shakes his head he's trying desperately to keep their spirits up "Oh I guess it was just...just the situation we're in. oh I don't know? No, you're right it's not funny"

"Hey... sorry. I know what you mean" She smiles, she knows it was more of a hopeless laugh than a funny one. She notices the wound on his chest "That doesn't look good. ... Let me look" she gently and carefully peels the dressing back as he grimaces in pain "Sorry"

 _Awww!_ He sucks the air through his teeth as the dressing comes away, it hurts

"It needs cleaning" she frowns "It needs covering or it's gonna get infected" She thinks for a moment the best way to clean it up. They have some bottled water and then she takes off her shirt off, that she's wearing over her vest top. She rips it using a bit of it clean at the wound with the clean water. Then she tears a strip and makes a square of cotton fabric to patch it.

She looks up at Clay, the pain in his eyes "You okay?" She sighs deeply "Oh god.. this whole thing such a mess. I'm sorry you got involved in this. I never ... I never imagined this would happen"

Clay's sat watching her as she puts put her hand to her mouth to contain any cries she might make. She closes her eyes and takes a breath, an emotional knot in her throat and she's trying to stifle her tears. "They'll come!" He reassures her.

"I know!" She nods "Maybe not so much for me... but they'll come for you" she laughs. "All we have to do is get through this and wait"

"Yeah. We can do this.. Now we've got each other." He put his hand to the back of her head and look her in the eyes "They'll come!" He doesn't know why but he leans in to kiss her. Just as his mouth touches hers the door swings open.

They both blink in the light _Oh Shit!_ She takes a deep breath "Now what!"

Clay gets thrown a tee shirt "Put that on and get up! Your leaving"

He puts it on over his head and she helps him pull it over his chest, grimacing as it goes over the wound

"What's going on?" CJ frowns "What do you mean he's leaving? Leaving to go where?"

No one says a word to either of them. It makes them apprehensive and then before either of them realize what's going to happen, Reagan grabs C.J by the back of the neck and slams her down on to the hard-concrete floor.

 _Arrrrghhh!_ she squeals at the pain as he forces her against the cold concrete, his knee in her back to hold her still. She panics wondering what's going to happen to her

"No!" Clay cries out as he tries to stand up "No! Just leave her alone. If you're gonna do something do it to me!"

"Shut him up!" Reagan pulls her hair back and exposed her neck. Clay can see the glint of a knife blade

"Shit No! No please... No! Don't do that!"

"I said get him _up_ and get him out of here!" the large guy in a leather jacket pushes Clay to the doorway

"Stop what the hell are you doing? Leave her... please!" he panics "What the hell's going on?"

" _OUT!"_ they order him to the door

"No wait!" Clay uses all the strength has left to hold fast, unsure what they're going to do to her

"Clay ..." She cries "just go" She's scared but she thinks they're letting him go in exchange for her. She grits her teeth expecting the worst and as she turns her head and also catches the light on the knife blade.

Regan makes a cut in her skin exactly where the tracker chip is _Fuckkk! Arghhhhh!_  
She screams in pain. "Oh god! Wait! No .. don't!"

"NO!" Clay cries from outside the room as he hears her screams.

They waiting outside the door is a blacked-out truck waiting with the doors open. They point a gun at him "Get in!" He doesn't move "I said _**get**_ in!"

"What are you doing to her?" Clay's breathing fast and panicked now not knowing whats happening in that room

"She'll be fine...now just get in, like I told you!" he waves the gun at him indicating for him to get in the vehicle. The engines running waiting, but they don't move for now.

Clay's desperately trying to see where C.J is hoping she's coming with them "What are they doing to her?"

"You were told to shut up!" the guy in the front turns round and stares at him.

Reuben appears at the doorway to the dark room where they've been held. Oh _shit!_ He sighs as he sees what Reagan has done to her "I told you, you didn't need to do that! You could have left it. They're going to find her anyway" he sighs again rubbing his head.

 _Fuck!_ He looks at all the blood down CJs neck as she still lays on the floor. He never gave the order for Reagan to remove the tracker out. It's something he's chosen to do for himself and it annoys Reuben not because he's what he's done to her, but because he didn't authorize it. He wasn't the one controlling the order.

"The whole bloody point is for them to find her. I mean.. I'm just about to let them have the location, from her phone" he rolls his eyes "Catherine...I _am_ sorry about this" he grimaces as he sees the blood run down her neck.

"You know what some of these people are like, they just won't wait, but I.. I am sorry" he can hear her sobs "that must have hurt, and I apologize" he shakes his head as Mark looks at him "Get finished up here, and let's go! Oh...and Catherine one more thing .. I _want_ that flash drive. I think you will see.. I'm serious"

She looks up at him from her position on the floor. Her eyes pleading with him not to leave her here. She's worried he's going to leave her with Reagan and shes not sure what he will do to her.

She can feel the wet blood as it now trickles down her neck. The next thing she knows her feet are zip tied and she's dragged to the mattress. Her hands put in the chain that were holding Clay before.

"No! Nooo! No!" she scream "What are you doing? _REUBEN!_ Don't do this _PLEASE!_ " she struggles and kicks out as much as she can "Reuben wait!" He's her only chance to appeal against what's happening to her. He's the only one who might listen to her cries for help.

"Catherine you need to stay calm... I'm sure they won't be long before they find you." he smiles "We'll be in touch very soon"

She panics her breathing is really rapid, making it worse that they tie a gag in her mouth. She shakes her head, fighting against her restraints.

As they leave. Reuben sends the text from her phone and throws it on to the floor. It's just out of her reach. She keeps screaming for them not to leave her as they close the door.

She puts her head back against the wall, trying to calm her panic. She has pains in her chest and struggling to breath but she manages with quite a bit of effort to untie the gag and take it off it was tight and with her hands tied together not easy but that helps her breathing.

She can hear the sounds of engines moving off and then everything goes silent. That quiet is broken as her cell phone starts to ring. She tries desperately to get to it but it's just too far across the other side of the room for her to reach it.

Sitting alone in the dark, all she can hear now is the sound of her own breathing. Other than that, there is total silence.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

"We got a trace on that cell yet" Jason's takes his hat off and is rubbing his head before putting it back on.

"Doing it now" Davis is typing quickly at the laptop in front of her

"Do it faster!" he's impatient. The first lead they've had in hours. "We need to be acting on this people" he claps his hands

"Okay it coming up somewhere, mid central" she frowns "that's out near the old dock yards"

"We're outta her, ping me the location!" He's headed to the door "Ray, Sonny... get Trent and Brock we're set to go! We've got a location"

They gear up with equipment and weapons and load into the blacked-out van

"HAVOC comm check copy?" He checks his comms

"Good copy Bravo 1"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Davis sends them the location coordinates to the old, disused warehouse.

"HAVOC, this Bravo 1 you got eyes on us yet? We need to know what we're walking into"

She's sent them with a drone "Bravo 1, once the drone is up. I'll do a sweep"

"Drones showing no vehicles or movement in the vicinity at this time. Copy "

"Any prior movements Copy"

"I'm waiting on a second satellite sweep it'll be about twenty mikes then I'll update. Copy"

"Ray stay here, you're on cover " he points to a location spot behind "Sonny, you with me. Trent, Brock take the dog around back "

Everyone's in position "Okay... send in the hair missile"

Cerb goes into the building. Brock's watching the screen to the camera attached to him. "Looks like it's all clear...Nothing but an empty building" Brock's still watching the dog cam. He sees Cerb goes to one of the doors and starts scratching then stands outside "Building looks all clear but he's indicating something in that room at the back"

 _Oh Shit!_ Sonny nervously takes a breath as he looks at Jason. They're both wondering if that's good or what the hell they're going to find.

Everyone's thought about nothing else except what if they find the worst, but no one's wanted to say it out loud but now they're confronting reality.

Jason looks around as they enter the building "Clear!" The whole warehouse is empty they relax slightly dropping their weapons

"Jace!" Trent calls him over. "There's blood...and tyre tracks! Someone _was_ here"

"Shit! Looks like they cleaned out"

 _Dammit!_ _FUCK!_ Sonny's annoyed they may have lost them, and he bends down to ease the knot in his stomach

"Hey guys Cerb's got something"

"What is it?"

"Think there's something in here?!" They all look at each other taking a deep breath watching as Cerb's still scratches at the door.

"Sonny stay there!" Unsure how his number three will hold up if what they're dreading is behind this door. He makes him stay out "Okay... on three!... Three ...two...one ...execute!"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

C.J hears what sounds like scratching at the door and listens

 _What the hell?_ her mind's working overtime it feels like at least two hours or more she since Reuben left with Clay. She's guessing as she actually has absolutely no idea and though shes listened for every sound, the silence has been deafening. So, this new sound is strange to her senses.

"Hello!" her words don't come out very loud. Her mouth is so dry, and the sounds just won't come out. It's okay as she almost doesn't dare to call out in She feels really vulnerable sat here and she tries to keep her breathing calm but it's hard, _Deep and slow Catherine. Deep and slow!_

She tells herself over and over as she pushes her back against the wall. Not that it's going to help if something bad happens just that the solid firmness behind her makes her feel more secure in the dark. She rubs her neck, it's sticky with the dried blood and it hurts. So do her ribs She just wants to lie down, go to sleep and for this to all go away.

Bracing herself against the wall as the light from the open door, floods into the room. She closes her eyes.

She wants to scream but it won't come out. Her breathing goes haywire, she can't get any air in her lungs as she suddenly panics. Her chest becomes tight, there's a pain as she continues to struggle for breath. She's having a sudden full-blown anxiety attack. She didn't realize quite how on edge she was until now. _Shit! Shit!... Shit!_

The dog bursts in and barks at her "Good Boy" Brock calls him back as he stares at the _CJ  
Oh shit!_ "Think we need Trent in here!"

 _Oh Lord!_ It's not a statement Sonny wanted to hear, and he takes a breath as Jason calls Trent forward.

She shields her eyes from the light her breathing is erratic now "CJ...CJ, it's okay! It's Trent...Shhh!" he tries to calm her "C.J you need to breath slowly" He can see she is having a panic attack and he clicks his fingers in front of her, trying to get her to focus her attention "Slowly... CJ breathe with me." he does slow breaths as he gets her to look at him. "Slow... Deep... slow" he smiles "Good girl, just keep it slow!" He looks at all the blood on her neck "Are you hurt?"

Jason enters the room "Where's Clay?"

She shakes her head again as she leans it back against the wall trying to calm down "They...they took him" she manages to breathlessly get out.

"I gonna need more light." Trent frowns as he looks at her neck "We gonna need to move her" Trent looks for Jason's approval, holding the chains around her wrists

"Sonny bring the cutters!"

They cut the chain and the zip ties around her feet "Can you stand up" Trent frowns helping her to an upright position She nods though she's not sure if she actually can. Her legs are like jelly and she uses the wall to hold herself "You okay?"

She feels faint standing up. Her legs buckle and Jason see's she about drop "Woaah! steady" He catches her as she blacks out for a few moments. He sweeps up her legs from under her and carries her out of the room, into the light.

As she comes around she puts her arms round his neck and buries her face into his chest and just cries and doesn't stop. "Hey, c'mon you're fine. I got ya" he kisses the top of her head trying to calm and reassure her. _Shit!_ he sighs as he sits on the floor with her in in his arms, he's worried about Clay. He pulls his comms out of his ear to cut out the chatter and closes his eyes taking a breather. It's a heavy burden, they fact they still didn't get Spenser back

Sonny's not happy about that either and he looks at Trent and rolls his eyes as he watches Jason wraps his arms around her. She hasn't stopped shaking and he's worried by how emotional she is. This has pushed her over completely over the edge. "Is she gonna be alright?" he looks up at Trent for answers

"Give me ten minutes, do assessment. The shakes are due to the adrenaline from the panic attack we'll find out more once she calms down"

Jason tries to reassure her by stroking her hair. "CJ did you hear what Trent said? You need to calm down!"

"Where's the pain? I mean where's it worst?" Trent looks at her as he indicates to her ribs "Okay! I understand that, but I'm gonna deal with this cut on your neck first"

He's worried with all the blood and he cleans it up. He lifts her hair up out of the way it came loose from her ponytail when she grappled with Reagan and it won't stay of the way "Can you hold for me" he looks at Jason.

Jason sighs this all feels slightly awkward after everything He can't look at her at properly he has such mixed-up emotions about her and he's trying to remain in control. The fact is Spenser's still missing and he still needs to do his job as leader of his team not get upset about the state she's in.

Trent looks at her neck where all the blood has dried. Kind of a dark black color "It's not great, she'll probably need a couple of stitches when we get back"

Jason nods to him he puts his comm back in his ear "HAVOC this is BRAVO 1 do you copy?"

"Copy Bravo 1"

"Can we have medic standing by when we return?... I'll update sitrep ASAP"

"Copy Bravo 1 standing by"

"She's okay though? I mean she doesn't look too good!"

Her breathing becomes rapid and shallow again and she starts to panic "Hey, just calm down. Take nice slow breaths" Trent tells her. "Slow!"

"CJ! Listen to Trent...slow, with me" Jason breaths in and out "slow .. okay? You're not helping yourself getting panicked like this " Jason works on keeping her breathing steady while Trent's trying to assess what's going on with her ribs

Brock's sending Cerberus round the building double checking. They need to make sure Spenser's not here anywhere before they leave. That the building is actually clear.

"Bravo 5 the dog got anything yet?"

"BRAVO1 this is BRAVO 5 We're clear boss!"

"Bravo 2 how we looking out there? Any movement"

"Bravo 1 everything clear out here...What's happenin?"

"Bravo 2 keep eyes open. We've got C.J but no Spenser. Looks like they took him when they shipped out"

"Okay...copy that "

"HAVOC this is Bravo 1, any luck on that satellite trace. We get any movement Copy"

"BRAVO1 this is HAVOC... Yeah now looking at them as we speak. Show two vehicles leaving approximately two hours ago. They drove out of that warehouse so don't know who's in the actual vehicles. I'm trying to trace their position but there's an issue with the SAT feed. They're coming up blank for that time period, which is unusual"

"Copy that HAVOC keep me up to speed with anything. Keep working on locating those vehicles. 1 out"

His mind returns to the current situation as Trent gets a syringe out of his kit. Jason frowns "I'm gonna give her some morphine. I'm not sure if her ribs are broken but she's definitely got a couple of cracked ribs. She's gotta be in a hell of a lot of pain after all this time"

 _Shit!_ he rubs his head, frustrated "That means she gonna be out of it for a while. Alright we need to clear out. We're doin no good sat here. We need ta get a fix on Spenser" He rubs his head with his free hand then wraps it back around her, holding her close as the drugs take effect and she closes her eyes "Okay everyone move out! Nothing more we can do here! Bravo 2, this Bravo 1, we're coming out"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Back at base Trent's with C.J in a side room at the medical unit. The base Doctor is doing an assessment of her. They already took her down for an X-ray

The drive back has been about an hour so and now she coming round a bit. The Doctor's holding the X-Rays up and shows Trent "There's a couple of small fractures just there... The one she had pinned from before has held but there's a small hairline fracture there as well" he swaps the X-Rays round "Mainly it's bruising to the lung... it'll making breathing more painful for a while, but she should make a full recovery in time. "Oh, and we put a couple of stitches in that wound on her neck, she just needs to keep it clean and dry"

Trent nods again "Anything else I need to know?"

"Um ... these" the doctor looks up at Trent handing him a small brown pill bottle "...some strong pain relief. Two every four hours, she can have some extra _if_ she finds it necessary. She might for the first few days. "

"I'll take those" Jason's now standing in the doorway, his normal pose, arms folded

Trent nods in agreement "yeah that's probably for the best. She's pretty fragile right now. We don't want any past repeats."

The Doctor just looks at them both "Okay! Well that's me pretty much done...Unless there's anything else?" he sighs "Just tell her to take it steady once she comes round. She'll better after some sleep"

Jason sighs "Okay! I'll keep an eye on her"

Ray comes behind him in the doorway "Just spoke to Naima...they're all good" he smiles "You gonna take her to see him, when she wakes up?"

Jason watches her sleeping and thinks about Ray's question "No! No not yet! Doc says she needs to sleep. I need her to hold up until we get this done, until we get Clay back I can't risk her falling apart"

"You don't think it might help for her to see JC?" he shrugs. Jason doesn't answer him "Okay! Your call I guess!" Ray shakes his head, hes not sure keeping her from her child is best for anyone but he'll go with Jason's' decision "So what's next?"

Jason's stood there silently thinking "Go home Ray, get some time with your kids. Davis's still tracking these vehicles. 'til then get some rest "

C.J groans as she starts to come round. "And what about her?" Ray nods towards where CJ is lying

"I'll give her a bit of time to come around. I need to speak to Blackburn then. Then...well teh I'll take her home with me, let her sleep it off there"

"Brother, is that a good idea?"

"What else can I do Ray?" He sighs " Trent, you and Brock go get some rest too. We need to be ready to go if we're gonna get Clay back"

Sonny's at the doorway watching them "What's going on?"

"Get some rest Sonny! Get your game face on to be ready to go if we get that location"

"Ready? I'm ready now right now! We need to get the kid back not standing around like dicks swinging in the wind. We need to get out there"

"We will... _when_ we get that location" Ray tries to reassure him "Sonny, get some rest!"

"So, what's happenin with Little Miss Pain the Ass there?"

"Don't ask!" Ray says rolling his eyes "Just don't ask, brother"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

C.J wakes up. There's no one in the room now it's all quiet. She gets herself into a sitting up position and looks around _Where the hell is everyone?_

She tries to stand but it takes a bit of effort with the pain and the way her head feels groggy _Pheww!_ she lets out a sigh as she hold on to the bed to steady herself. She shakes out the pain in her neck, its really sore. Her ribs are more of dull ache now, must still be the pain relief having some effect.

As unsteady as she is on her feet she manages to get to the door into the corridor. As she walks further down past the offices to find the rest of BRAVO when she hears her name  
"Catherine?... Catherine?... Lieutenant!"

She looks round no one's called her that for quite some time. Then she sees Captain Harrington in his office doorway, and she smiles

"Catherine, what you doing here?" he frowns "What's happened to you, are you okay?"

"Um.." She sighs "yeah...long story Sir. And um.. you know it's not Lieutenant now" she smiles

He leans forward and kisses her cheek "I know, just habit I guess. You know I still can't believe he did that" He frowns. Smiling apologetically "How are you anyway? I haven't seen you since the funeral"

"Um... well, alive so that's good I suppose"

"How's that godson of mine? He must be getting big now?"

She gulps at the thought of Jaycee; she sighs apprehensively he obviously doesn't know that JC is with Jason "Yeah he um...he is" she fakes a smile.

"I miss your Father. Washington's not the same when I'm up there now" he frowns at her worried by how terrible she look "Despite everything ... he was a good man Catherine ...always remember that. I never has so much fun as when we were growing up"

She smiles "Yeah he told me the stories often enough"

"Oh, just a minute" he picks up a file from the desk "Why don't you take a seat...I just need to give this to him.." he points to a person in the corridor "... this file"

She sits down in his chair the other chair in the office is full of paperwork she laughs _Harrington never did like paperwork_ She puts her hand on her ribs and rubs them gently. They're hurting again, probably from moving around and the pain relief wearing off.

Smiling she looks out of the doorway; she can see him in the corridor talking. She bites her lip as she pulls at the bottom desk drawer. _Hmmm!_ she sighs _It's gotta be here somewhere_. She pushes the paperwork out of the way and there it is in the bottom of the drawer. The bottle of expensive scotch _Still old School Harrington...Just like my father_

She smiles as she turns the bottle over in her hand. _Probably payment for some bet they had_ she laughs as she thinks back the times when she was young, in her Fathers office she'd see them dig in the bottom drawer and pull out the bottle of whiskey and then _"toast"_ someone.

She smiles at the fond memories, then checks the corridor, she can see he's still talking. Theres a long sigh as she sits with the bottle, still in her hand while nervously biting her lip she looks at the golden colored contents. It's calling her and taking off her jacket she wraps it around, hiding it. Then she closes the desk drawer.

"Hey sorry about that!" Harrington smiles as he returns to the office " So, where were we?"

"Oh um..." she looks at her watch "Look I'm sorry I need to um... go" she points "I have to find Jason, you know ... um Clay.. Bravo he's missing..." she looks tired and confused so he doesn't push it further to make her stay

"Yes! Yes, I heard about the situation. I actually need to get up to speed with that. Commander Blackburn's handling it. Do they have any idea where he is?"

"Um...they're working on it. Really sorry ... I need to go"

"Catherine!" he holds her arm and kisses her cheek "if you need anything, I mean anything then you just call me, okay?"

"Yeah! I will Uncle Charlie" she smiles

"WOW! " he smiles "You haven't called me that in a long time"

She laughs "No I guess I haven't"

"Well take care of yourself and don't forget to let me see that Godson of mine real soon!"

"I won't! and Thank you Sir" She smiles tucking the bottle wrapped in her jacket under her arms

"Take care , Lieutenant"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

She closes the cubicle door in the ladies bathroom and sits on the lid of the pan. _Pheww!_ She lets a long breath out. She knows it's wrong and is telling herself not to do it, but with shaking hands she gives in to the temptation, unwrapping the bottle from her jacket and unscrews the lid.

She takes another deep breath, looking up at the ceiling trying to talk herself out of it. _Come on Catherine you don't need this._ She rubs her head and swallow nervously.

It's no good she gives in. Letting out a big sigh she puts the bottle to her lips _Urrrrgghh!_ she coughs choking on the fiery liquid "Oh that's disgusting" she looks back at the ceiling talking to her Father "How the hell could you drink this shit?" then she laughs as in her head she hears him reply to her "Yeah I know! _What the fuck are you doing Catherine?_ I hear you!"

She shakes her head and bites her lip before she closes her eyes and takes another long large swig. She's hot and comes out of the cubicle to look at herself in the mirror _Fuck! That's not a good look there Lewis!_ Then taking another drink she takes a breath talking to herself in the mirror "I need shower and some sleep" she runs her hands through her hair. Her mind's all over the place.

Trying to forget what it is she's doing; she turns her back on the mirror and closes her eyes. She then drinks. Glugging back the whiskey without stopping this time.

She rubs her face; tears start to roll down her cheeks and the pressure of everything starts to take its toll on her. She's openly crying and slides down the counter onto the floor. She stands the bottle down next to her as she pulls her knees up, hugging them with her arms and burying her head in the gap _Fuck! I can't do this anymore!_

She runs her hand through her hair again it's still all matted with the blood from her neck and she closes her eyes again taking a moment pause before picking up the bottle and drinking some more. She coughs and splutters some out, the liquid hitting the back of her throat too quickly, making her retch. Shaking she sits rocking back and forward, so tired that she can't think straight. Sobbing into her hand.

Then suddenly the door to the bathroom opens and Davis walks in **_Oh Shit!_** "What the hell are you doing? Give me that!" Davis snatches the bottle from her hand and then rushes out into the corridor calling out " _HELP!... I NEED SOME HELP IN HERE!"_

Sonny turns and looks at Ray in the office. He frowns "Is that Davis? I thought I heard her"

"I thought I heard something but I'm not sure if it's Davis"

"DAVIS?" Sonny calls into the now empty corridor

" _SONNY... in here!"_ he hears the muffled voice coming from the ladies bathroom

He and Ray cautiously push the door open the door "Davis..." Sonny frowns then he registers the scene in front of him _Holy Shit!_ He enters into the bathroom, CJs still sat on the floor and he can see the part drunk whiskey Davis is holding "Where the fuck did she get that?"

Davis doesn't know what to do but she's trying to hold her, comfort her she's crying so much

Ray's at the door he shakes his head "Dammit! I'll go.. I'll get him"

Ray checks the offices and briefing rooms "You seen Jason?" He asks Mandy when he can't find him

"No! Why? Something happened? Something with Clay" she can see the look on Ray's face, but he's gone before she gets a reply

He continues to check the canteen and bathrooms then he remembers him saying he was going to see Blackburn and he gets to the office, knocks but enters before waiting for an answer "Jace, sorry brother... we need you!"

"Can it wait?"

"No! No, you need to come now!"

Both Jason and Blackburn leave the office and follow him back down the corridor. Ray holds the door open and Jason enters the bathroom.

 _Oh SHIT!_ "How the hell did this happen?" he rubs his head in frustration "CJ!.. What the hell are you doing?" He takes the bottle and empties it down the sink " _GET UP!_ _..._ I said... _GET UP!_ That's an order" She's sobbing uncontrollably. Everyone looks at him he's being really hard on her and not sympathetic "CJ... I said GET the HELL UP!"

She tries, staggering as she pulls herself up _Aarrghhh!_ She squeals as he grabs at her, the pain in her ribs. He looks at her, he's so angry but she looks so pathetic stood there.

 _Ahh Fuck!_ "What the hell are you doing!" he wants to be tough with her but her face as she looks at him, he just breaks and puts his arms rounds and holds her "Shit! CJ why didn't you come to me" He sighs, closing his eyes as he holds her tight against him "We're gonna sort this"

The others all look at one another not sure what to do.

"This is _BULLSHIT!_ " Sonny's fuming "We should be finding Clay, not dealing with this crap again! God dammit!" he's so mad and takes his hat off and throws it down "She needs to get herself the _fuck_ together. You know, she carries on like this she's gonna get Clay killed"  
he shakes his head and walks out slamming the door on the way out.

"I'll go after him" Ray says picking up Sonny's hat from the floor. Davis looks at the door she wants to go after Sonny. He's hurting so much, him and Spenser are so close, and she knows this is tearing him apart. .

"You Okay" Davis looks sympathetically at Jason.

He nods "Just get on with tracing those vehicles. We need to find them, and we need to get this done" he's thinking that if they don't find the vehicles and they have to send C.J back with that file as an exchange that she's not going to hold up.

"Master Chief, I need a word" Blackburn's at the doorway "Now!"

They step outside the bathroom

"Sir?"

"Jason, I'm sorry but I've got no choice. I need her gone from the base" He looks at Jason "She's in no fit state to be here! She's a liability to this operation. She needs some help!"

He nods, reluctantly, but he does understand where he's coming from.

"Jason I'm worried she won't hold up to make that exchange, not the state she's in" he pauses knowing Jason's not gonna like what he says. He sighs "but as it stands, and what I just witnessed in there. Then I can't authorise her being involved in this anymore"

"She'll be fine. Some sleep and sober up, she'll be okay!"

Blackburn's shaking his head "Not from what I can see she won't"

"Sir, with all due respect, she's our only chance! This guy, Reuben, he's not gonna trust anyone else to make that exchange!"

Blackburn's still not convinced "Well maybe he's going to have to? Look, officially Jason she's a civilian now. I'm not gonna get clearance to let her be involved in her current condition"

"Eric...she'll be okay" Jason frowns "I know she will, she'll do this, to get Clay back. You have my word. Look, I'll take responsibility for the call to put her in the field"

Blackburn sighs a reluctant sigh "One chance! That's all I'm giving you. Get her into some sort of operational state and then we'll talk" he doubtfully as he shakes his head "You know Spenser is counting on us. We can't take any chances."

"Yeah I'm well aware of that Sir and I wouldn't put her out there if I didn't think she'd be alright. Ill fix this"

As Blackburn leaves Jason lets out a long-tired sigh. He needs a miracle right now and a way to fix this... and fast!


	40. Chapter 40

**Chapter 40: Take the tablet**

Clay finds himself in different place but exactly the same situation, except now he has the worry about what happened to C.J. Hearing her scream like that's concerning him more than his own current predicament.

Reagan comes to the room, he's smiling "Not looking too good there Mr Spenser"

"Where is she? What did you do to her?"

"Who?...Oh her! Yeah don't worry about her. She's fine... for now." he laughs "You concentrate on you and what's going to happen to you" he laughs again. "Bring him!"

The two guys with Reagan pull him up off the mattress and move him to the chair that Reagan sets ready. They tie his hands to the arms of chair with tape and the same with his feet around the legs. He struggles but realises it's a waste of energy as he won't be able to get free.

Reagan smiles and it's right then that Clay can see the likeness he has to his brother. It's there in the way he smiles.

"This is more like it!" he reigns in a blow from his fist onto Clay's face, following it up with several more. Then he finishes his punishment with a hard punch to his ribs. He watches as blood drips down from Clay's mouth and his head drops. He hasn't the energy to lift it and Reagan pulls him back by his hair.

Blood is pouring from Clay's nose and his mouth is bloodied "Hold him!" Reagan orders as he prepares to punch him again.

Just as he pulls his fist back Reuben walks in "What the _HELL_ is going on here?" he's fuming with anger "Are you trying to kill him?" he sighs. _Shit_ "Mark, get him untied, now!"

The other two guys look at each other but do as they're told and cut the tape. Clay falls forwards on to the floor, he's at the point of being unconscious. Dripping with blood and sweat but he does manage a quiet groan. that lets everyone know he's still alive.

"At least you haven't actually killed him" Reuben sighs, shaking his head in despair "SHIT! Why the hell are you such a bloody hot head? Your brother was never this stupid"

Mark takes offense "No, but he still managed to get himself killed, didn't he?" he sneers "This...this is payback for my Brother"

"And I told you, you can have that w _hen_ I get that file and not before. I _need_ him for now. She isn't going hand it over without him alive"

"Sure, she will. She was about ready to break in that room. So, we just take it from her. She comes and we take it from her and then I kill her, simple!"

"We'll see!" Reuben swallows anxiously "I may still need her yet. I need to get that file open"

"You're soft on her?" Reagan laughs "You fucked her and now you're soft on her? You think I'm stupid I'd say it's you, falling for some whore like her"

"I'm not soft on her but I still need to get that file open." He looks at Clay lying on the floor. Clay can't move but he looks up as Reuben crouches over him and smiles "Mr Spenser was charmed by her too, weren't you" he stands up, straightening his tie "I told you I need her. You'll get her once I'm done!"

"What do you need her for? She'll have burned all her bridges when she hands that file over"

"I still need to unlock the security on it" He glares at Reagan for questioning him "and I still think she can do that...despite what she says. I just need to find a way of making her"

"Well I have ways!"

"Yes, and you'll get to use them after all, that's what I'm paying you for. But this...this is not what I paid you for. You work for me. Once I have what I want then you're welcome to do what you want to either of them, but for now, I need him _alive_! Do I make myself clear?"

Reagan shakes his head disapproving of how he's been spoken to but doesn't answer back. He walks away. Clay's listening although he's drifting in and out of consciousness. His jaw aches so much and the taste of blood in his mouth is disgusting. He spits it out as he chokes on it.

"Get him cleaned up! I need another video" he looks at his watch "Time's ticking Ms Lewis. Time for you to pay up!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason opens the door and lets them both into the empty house. She feels sick but is starting to sober up. Her head's throbbing and she can still taste that whiskey in her throat.

"You look like shit" he frowns as they stand at the door.

"Yeah well I don't feel much better"

"C.J you..."

She cuts him off "Just don't start alright! I know... I know I fucked up, I get it" she sighs.  
This feels like de ja vu coming back here and she takes a deep breath "Look Jason, this doesn't feel right, being here"

"You need a shower. Then get some sleep. And we've got no choice about you being here. I've got nowhere else for you to go after what just happened, Blackburn's ordered you off the base, so...this is it!" He looks her in the eye pushing her hair back from her face and shoulders.

"You're right" she nods, giving him a tired, exhausted smile "Thanks"

"CJ, you need to get it together" he kisses the top of her head and pulls her towards him wrapping his arms around " and we need to focus on getting Clay back"

She nods "Yeah, you're right about that. He wasn't in a good way" A million dark images flash through her head. She shakes them away " Right, shower and sleep. Then I'll be fine!" she sighs again "Jason. I'll get it together. I promise "

"I hope so. ...for Clay's sake"

o-o-o-o-o-o

She stands in the bathroom and starts to undress. Taking off her vest top she looks at the bandages around her ribs _Oh fuck!_ She sighs as she leans against the wall. It all feels too much effort, but she needs this shower.

She unwraps the dressings and runs the water in the shower _Shit!_ She has to take a moment before standing under the water. _A_ _ahhhhh!_ "That feels good"

She looks at the water running down the drain. It's red from the blood in her hair and she leans her head back against the tiles. Those dark images again start to fill her mind as she closes her eyes. Clay, the smell of that room and the knife blade. They swirl around in her head as she stands there, and an anxious feeling of panic starts to rise up from her stomach making her feel sick again.

 _Awww!_ she jolts back to reality and the images disappear as the water runs on the cut on her neck, it stings. She grins and bears it till the throbbing finally stops.

Phew! She sighs, she can't stop thinking about Clay where is he and if he's okay. Then turning the water off she steps out of the shower. Running her fingers thorough her hair to get the tangles out. She feels cleaner, if not actually better. She's just totally exhausted now.

Wrapped in a towel she calls out from the bathroom doorway "Um Jace...Jason?"

"Yeah?" he answers her from the kitchen "You Okay?"

"Have I got any clothes still here?" she realizes how dirty and blood stained the clothes on the floor are and that she actually has nothing to wear.

"Yeah um... might be some still" he goes to the bedroom then comes back with one of his tee shirts "This do for now?" he frowns "'til we find you some or get I'll get Davis to sort some more. Don't worry for now you're only gonna sleep"

"Thanks" she sighs "Would be nice to get my own wardrobe with my own clothes at some point time. Would be like a luxury" she laughs "Davis must be fed up sorting clothes out for me" They both laugh as she smiles at him "I seem to have lived in borrowed stuff recently" She rubs her headache with the palm of her hand and takes a deep sigh "What a fuckin mess this is!" her head aches and every time she closes her eyes those dark images come. _I need a drink._ _She keeps that to herself though_

"It'll be okay" he tries to reassure her. He's not sure who he's trying to convince her or himself. He heads back the kitchen he stops and turns back to say something and just as he faces her she drops the towel from around her naked body and pulls his large tee shirt over her head.  
He can't help but watch her, looking at her body and thinking how much he misses touching her. _Don't go there!_ He sighs to himself. He checks himself _Jason stop it!_ Then shaking those thoughts out of his head before he goes back to what he was doing.

"You okay?" he asks watching as she sits herself down on the couch.

"Been better" she smiles as she lays her head back into the cushions.

"You want a drink" he looks around the doorway at her

She looks at him and smiles. _Do I!_ _God how much I'd give for a_ _drink_ _right now!_

"I meant juice, water?" He smiles as if he can read her mind

"Juice will be fine" she smiles

He brings a glass through, but as he places it on the side table he notices she's already fallen asleep. He stands watching her for a few minutes before he sits down beside her and looking at her some more.

He looks at her bare legs stretched out in front of her and a stirring of emotions comes over him. He can't help it and he rubs his finger along the soft skin of her thigh. She's cool to the touch and he pulls the throw over her, to keep her warm. Then leaning against her he also closes his tired eyes.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Half-awake she lays still and quiet watching him. His head on her shoulder and his eyes shut as he sleeps. She smiles its nice watching him. He's always under such pressure and it makes a change seeing him at peace, especially with knowing what's coming.

She doesn't know why but she runs her finger on his chin, feeling the soft rough of his stubble. That gentle feel of her hand on him makes him open his eyes. He looks up and is staring her in the eyes

"Sorry" she smiles "You looked so peaceful" she runs her hand through her hair and lays her head back. She has her hand resting on the ache in her ribs and closes her eyes again.

Now it's his turn to watch her and he turns on his side, placing his hand gently on top of hers, feeling the softness of the skin on the back of it

"Jason..." she opens her eyes and looks at him. She shakes her head. " don't!"

He can't help it moving his hand down to the curve of her hip while she lays back with her hand gently rubbing that ache in her ribs "You still in pain" he frowns concerned

"Yeah a bit! "

"Shall I get you some painkillers?"

"Yeah, in a minute. The quiet is nice"

He puts his hand back on top of hers as she as she moves it gently across the ache and she slides her hand out from under his touch. He still continues to gently caress her ribs and she closes her eyes enjoying it _Hmmm!_ "That feels good."

As she lays there she feels his hand tentatively start to caress over her breast as well as her ribs. She thought it was just a slip of his hand but then he does it more with more pressure. She lays her head back and groans at the nice feeling. Then his hand finds the hem of the shirt and he slides his hand up underneath the fabric, feeling her naked skin.

"Jason...stop!" she shakes her head "This can't happen... it's not right what not with Clay..."

 _Shhh!_ "It's gonna be alright" He looks at her he knows she's right, but he can't help himself. He's nose to nose with her now, still gently caressing her body under the Tee.

Her breathing quickens in anticipation "Jason..."

They stare each other in the eyes and his lips touch hers softly brushing over them with a kiss. She swallows hard as she tries resist him, but she can't, he's offering comfort and love and after everything this past couple of days she wants it, no hell, she needs it.

He kisses her and she gives in telling herself she shouldn't, as she kisses him back. Putting her hand on the back of his head she gently caresses her fingers through his hair whilst the whole time keeping his eye contact. His kisses were soft but now they're more wanting. He's pushing in harder and the more he kisses her, the more turned on he's getting.

She puts her hand out to hold him back and lets out a sigh "Aarrghh!... Jace stop!" she groans in pain, leaning back, trying to get herself more comfortable

"Are you okay?" He smiles, stroking her hair and watching her face.

"Yeah I'm good"

He runs his hand over her cheek and his thumb along her lip as she leans forward and kisses him again. Then he moves himself, positioned on the floor kneeling between her legs. Running his hand down the soft smooth skin as he leans up against her to kiss. He wants her that's obvious and she wants him.

She shifts her hips to a better position on the couch, so that she feels more comfortable. Though she's in some discomfort it's not unbearable as he works his kisses down her neck. Then pulling the tee shirt up and over her head, he takes it off, throwing it on the floor.

She sighs his hands are all over her, but he's being gentle. She smiles. She's not use to him being this gentle, normally it's his strength and power when they fuck that she likes. Normally it's about both of them letting off steam and tension but this feels just right, this gentle side is new, but she likes it

"I won't break" she laughs as he smiles at her. He pulls his shirt off over his head and now his skin is on hers. He undoes his combats, taking them off and then he pushes his naked body against hers. She closes her eyes, her hands gripping his back pulling him and wanting him against her. _"Oh God!_ " she sighs.

The kissing is full on, much more wanting from both of them. Now he's in his world shutting everything out. He pushes his thick hardness inside, watching her face as it groans in pleasure.

He thrust forward and she smiles Mmmm! Oh yeah! She can feel his strength inside her. This, this is her Jason.

She's having to breath harder to bear the ache from her ribs, but she's not going to let him know and she not going to stop him. She closes her eyes concentrating on his movements against her body then just as she thinks she might have to relent to the pain she feels him cum inside her. His muscles let go and he relaxes his weight.

" _Hmmmm!_ " she smiles as he puts his hand round the back of her head. He pulls her towards him kissing her hard _Awww! Shit!_ She grimaces as he catches the cut on her neck with his hand.

"Sorry! "he kisses her neck

He pulls away and sits next to her. She lays there just listening to him breathing, then she leans over and kisses him again. They're both looking at the ceiling not speaking. Both starting to feel some regret realising that this probably shouldn't have happened. It was just a comfort thing. for them both, she tells herself. Just both of them needing something not wanting to be alone. He holds her hand and they link fingers. She leans her head back closing her eyes laying her hand on her ribs and lets out a soft groan.

He gets up and rummages in his pocket, then he brings out the small pill bottle he puts two in her hand and passes her the juice. "Thanks" she smiles

"C'mon" he pulls her up. She looks puzzled but he kisses her leading her to the bedroom doorway where he kisses her again. "You want me to stay the night with you or I can take the couch?"

"Stay!" She smiles and then it's her turn to take control and she pushes him back on to the bed.

She bites her lip watching him laid there, he's still naked and she crawls up his body until her lips are level with his and brushes them gently across his.

He smooths his hands down the curves of her hips and over her butt as she leans over him. He continues to stroke her skin as she straddles her legs across him. Sitting on top over his waist she leans forward and they kiss again. Looking at him eye to eye, "My turn!" she smiles

 _Mmmm!_ He groans as he pulls her forward, kissing her hard as she rocks her hips against him _Oh god!_ he sighs as taking him in her hand she slowly slides down the shaft of his cock. She lifts he weight before forcing down against him, again and again. He forgot how good she was at that. She had it just right with the movement and it sends shivers through his body.

He thought he might be able to hold out, but he can't "Oh!...Oh CJ I'm gonna cum!" He closes his eyes

"No! No..." she smiles "not yet " she stops her movement letting the feeling subside.

 _Mmmm!_ He groans in frustration, placing his hands on her breasts squeezing and caressing then. Tweaking her hard nipples, sitting up to suck on them. It turns her on and she closes her eyes, moving her hips again. The wave of pleasure is building up inside her and she takes a deep breath _Hmmm!"_ she sighs again taking a breath as she feels the peak come and she groans out loud "Oh fuck!"

As he feels her tense he can't hold " _Oh god C.J! ...Oh Jeez! Mmmm!"_ _he relaxes_ "Oh hell, I'm sorry"

 _Mmmm! s_ he smiles, "It's okay!" he managed to hold just long enough for her, and she runs her hand through her hair, then leans forward kissing him.

Her hair's all over his face and he pushes it out of the way holding it to the side, carefully rolling her, he lays next to her kissing her. His lips move from her mouth, down her neck and back against her breast. Mouthing and sucking at it, she closes her eyes. But as they both sighs exhausted it's not long before they stop kissing, and they relax, before falling asleep.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

As she wakes up, she realizes Jason's not in the bed with her. She puts her hand across the empty space where he was.

She has no idea of the time and laying there quietly she rubs the pain in her ribs. The ache is worse this morning but last night's exertions didn't help with that.

She pulls her hair back and lets out a sigh, its tinged with regret and she looks at the ceiling.  
 _Shit!_ she shakes her head, now filled with the guilty regrets of last night. She wishes they could just leave each other alone, stay away, but despite everything they never could. She lets out a long sigh, releasing the tension as she lays still on the bed. She frowns, listening, she can hear voices. _  
_

She get up and opening the closet she takes another clean tee-shirt and puts it on before padding through to the living room. She's confused, wondering why Jason, Ray ,Sonny and Trent are now sat here talking. "Hey!" she frowns "What's going on?"

"Oh you're awake...figured you needed to sleep so I left you. You feeling okay?"

"Yeah!" She rubs her neck and nods "Yeah better after last night" she smiles. "Still some pain but bearable for now."

"Trent's gonna sort that for you" He looks at her in his T-Shirt "Davis brought you some more clothes" he points to a bag by the door "Why don't you get dressed, then we need to talk"

"Okay." she looks at him suspiciously. His attitude has cooled with her this morning and she looks at the rest of them standing quiet "Why's everyone here, What's going on?" she frowns. There feels like there's something's going, but she's not included

"We need to set up this exchange but after your stunt yesterday, Blackburn won't have you back on the base, so we're here." he pauses "CJ get dressed"

"Okay" she nods. She wonders why he's being so distant though she guesses he's feeling some guilt and regret about last night. She picks up the bag and heads to the bedroom.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

She's dressed now in a better fitting tee shirt and combats. She heads through to the living room.

Ray's in the kitchen doorway with his daughter. She's showing him her toy and his son in his arms. She frowns wondering why the kids are there. Then she hears another cry she recognizes. "Jaycee's here?" She frowns. They don't look at her, nor do they answer her question "Jason! What the hell's going on?"

"Sit down " He orders than asks.

"No, I wanna see my son first?" She frowns as she tries to look in the kitchen. Ray blocks her view

"Not yet! We need to talk to you first, sit down!"

"Talk? About what? Look surely I can just have a minute with him" she's really confused and concerned now

" _Not_ yet!"

She frowns, looking at Ray and Trent. Sonny's shuffling his feet on the ground not making eye contact. "What's going on here?"

Ray looks at Jason. He shakes his head. He already told Jason he doesn't agree with this plan. But reluctantly he goes along with it.

"C.J just _SIT_ " Jason's frustrated with her now.

She rubs her head and sighs. Cautiously she sits herself down on the couch "Fine!"

Trent's sitting across from her, a low table between them. Sonny leaning himself on the fireplace, while Jason stands over them, his arms folded.

"So, what's this about?" she frowns

Trent hands her two of the pain killers. She looks at them in her hand before taking them  
"This some sort of trick?"

"Just take them" he hands her a glass of water he has ready.

"Okay!" She picks up the glass and gulps them down not taking her eyes off Trent as she does. She's trying to get a read on what's going on "C'mon then, what is it?" Jason nods and Trent pushes the box of tablets across the table towards her. She frowns "What are they?"

"The tablets, the ones we discussed the other day, to help with the drinking."

"And I told you _NO_ thanks. I'll manage" she pushes them back "What hell is this about?" she frowns at them both

"C.J just listen. You can't go on like this, what happened yesterday" Jason snaps at her "Trent says these will help you."

"I'm fine! Really. It's just a blip! Seriously, I am I'm fine!" she looks at Trent for some support. Sonny's chewing his gum looking towards her from under the brim of his hat. Ray's still shaking his head. "What is this? You all stare at me long enough you think I'll change my mind?"

"C.J they'll help. Look, plenty of people use them. Just give them a chance" Trent tries to reassure her

"They're not a magic cure, Trent. They're not just gonna _fix_ me!"

"No, no you're right, but they can help. That's what they're for"

She pushes the box back _"NO THANKS!_ Now, I wanna see my son."

"Sorry but no!" Jason shakes his head. Ray closes his eyes this is not how he would he gone about this; he really doesn't think it will work. He thinks this will push her to the edge and she'll kick back.

"No! NO! Who the hell are you to say no?" she frowns angrily at him "How dare you? He's my son and you don't have any right to stop me" she stands up, but Ray blocks the doorway to the kitchen.

"Sit down!" Jason barks his orders "C.J, I said _sit down_!"

She bites her lip and sits down again _Hmmmm!_ She sighs, a deep pissed off, frown on her face.

"All you have to do is take the tablet, and you can see him"

"Are you serious?" She laughs as she looks at him " _Fuck you!._ What, you're serious!? You think you can blackmail me with my own son"

"What's the problem, just take it."

"I haven't got a problem and that's the whole point!"

He laughs and shakes his head "You can't stop drinking. You need help and this is help."

"Thanks, but I'm fine. Really! Just a momentary lapse that's all. Have you noticed what's gone on the past few days. It's been pretty stressful"

Jason stares at her "Okay, fine! Have it your way" he grinds his teeth together he didn't want to do this but she gives him no choice "Ray tell Naima thanks, but they can go home now."

"Go home?" she frowns "What do you mean go home, but I haven't seen my son yet?"

Ray moves "WAIT! Are you serious? They're gonna go home without me seeing him? What the _FUCK!_ _Jason c'mon, stop this_ _"_ she looks at Ray then back at Jason "Oh c'mon... all this over _one_ tablet? Jason be serious"

"Oh I am serious. Just take it!"

"You've got no right to do this! NO RIGHT!" she screams at him

" I think you might find I do."

"Since when? He's my son, not yours."

"Really? Well this residency order says different"

"What the hell?" she frowns looking at the piece of paper he waves in front her "Residency order? What residency. You can't do that." she shakes her head, giving him a puzzled and confused look as she opens the piece of paper he hands her and reads.

"I can when his mother is unfit to look after him"

"What? Seriously. You have no right to do that! What strings have you pulled for this bullshit No court will give you this, not when I tell them you're not his father."

"You gonna stick to that story are you?" He frowns staring at her as she doesn't answer. She just sits there biting her lip looking at the piece of paper in her hand. He sighs "See this other piece of paper? Well this tells me different; this tells me _I am_ his father."

She takes a breath frozen to the spot "What's that? "

"A paternity test. I had it done." he reads " _From the sample submitted the probability of Mr Hayes being the biological father is 99.9%_ "

"You got him tested?" She frowns, shocked "You can't do that. Not without my permission." She looks at Trent and he looks at the ground "Did you organize that? You know he can't do that legally. Jesus Trent ...this is wrong, and you know it!"

"He can" Trent gulps he doesn't like being on the end of her wrath "because you made him his legal guardian. For a paternity test, you need consent from either the Mother or, the legal guardian. Which is what you made Jason"

She gulps as she rubs her head while she thinks. She can't breathe for a minute. She can't believe he's plotted this all behind her back "But you did this without asking." she shakes her head "I thought you trusted me Jason?"

"I did. I always did, one hundred percent, but then you lied to me. You told me wasn't mine, that day when you left, but I didn't believe you anymore."

"And now? ...What? You'd take my son away. What is this, pay back." her head's spinning she can't believe Jason of all people would do this to her "He's my son and you can't take him away from me"

"I can, and I will. If I have to" His tone is more aggressive He doesn't want to do this to her, but he has no choice "If you don't get help then ...then you won't see him again. I need to do the right thing. You aren't in a fit state to look after him properly"

"The _right_ thing?" she laughs "Suddenly you want to do the right thing?" she shakes her head "You're unbelievable. What you suddenly so big on doing the right thing, yeah?" she bites her lip " What and last night when we were fucking that was the _right thing_ was it? You didn't even consider right from wrong last night. I even told you we shouldn't do it, but you said it was okay, _relax don't worry_!"

"Oh, hell Jason brother" Ray shakes his head "I knew it! I knew bringing her back here would lead to this!"

Sonny's now fuming with them both. "Jeez! _GOD DAMN..._ " he looks at Jason "You can't leave it alone can you?!" he shakes his head "What about Clay? Did you think about him, while you busy getting her panties off"?

Jason's embarrassed. He knows Sonny's right he never thought about anything last night, except getting what he wanted in that moment. Having sex with CJ. But he sure as hell regrets it now. He knows he shouldn't have done it "It's not what you think Sonny. It...it just kinda happened... it was a moment of weakness, tiredness. I let my guard down."

"No...not buyin it. You never learn where she's concerned" he shakes his head in disgust "Jeez Jason when will you get over this obsession with her. What the hell does she have to do before you stop chasin her" Sonny can't get his words out he so mad at him "I said it before and I say it again, she's fucking poison and she manages to twist you around _every_ single fuckin' time!"  
He shakes his head in angry disbelief "She gets wasted yesterday and now this bullshit! What makes me mad is we wastin' time. Time we could usin' to find Clay.

JC cries in the kitchen. She looks at Jason runs her hand through her hair _Fuck!_ "I can't believe you're doing this." she shake her head "So if I say no."

"Then simple, Naima goes home with the kids and you won't see him again"

She looks at Ray in the doorway she can tell he doesn't approve "And you agree with this? What he's doing?" she stares at him. She knows he won't defend her against Jason, but she still asks because she knows he thinks it's wrong "You don't do ya? This is bullshit and you know it"

"It's his call not mine"

"That's right you just follow orders. Yes Sir!" she looks at him, disappointed he won't help her "Fuck you Ray!" she thinks for a minute " You know what, fine! Fine, I'll take the damn tablet then what?"

"Then nothing. You can see JC and we focus on our plan for getting Clay back"

"Is that what this whole thing is, keeping me on side to get Clay back. Well you know what actually... _Fuck you!_ Fuck you and your pill. You can all got to hell!" She takes a breathe "None of you will say he's wrong in doing this. Then fine, you don't need me. Get on with it, sort your own mess. Get Clay back without me" he shakes her head, she's so mad that he's set all this up behind her back and he knew he was going to do this when he slept with her last night. "I'm done with you all!"

Ray looks at Jason he knew he'd push her too far; he looks at Sonny shaking his head. Jason doesn't answer.

Sonny looks at him he also knew this was a risk of pushing her too far she always kicks back when she doesn't get her own way But Sonny's mad now. All he's thinking about is getting Clay back. He steps forward and picks the packet of tablet's up.

Then inches from her face, he shoves the box against her "Take the damn pill!" he stares at her "Then you gonna make that call, set up this exchange and get Clay back!"

"I don't think so" she laughs, sneering at Sonny. As much as she doesn't want to hurt Clay she's game playing, trying to call Jason's bluff. She doesn't like him getting the better of her  
"He's so clever" she points at Jason "He had this all planned out, let him fix it"

Sonny's about lose it with her, he's so angry right now "It's your damn fault Clay's where he is. Should be you there not him!"

"My fault?!" she's shocked by this "My fault he's there. No, you wanna know whose fault it is? Blame the little CIA bitch!"

"Mandy? " he frowns "What the hell's she gotta do with this?"

"Her little _pillow talk_ that's what gave away that Jason had the file and not me. He'd have never known except after her roll in the sack with him, she got loose lipped and she couldn't help telling him she wanted his help" she has to hold her anger before she cries "I warned her to walk away. Not to trust him... but what did I know?" she runs her hand through her hair

Sonny's mad "This is all bullshit! Clay should be here and he's not. I want him back" he breathes in calming himself "I don't care how the hell his came about _YOU_ take that _DAMN_ tablet and make that call. Get it done! You all seem to be forgetting about Clay, he's stuck in some hell hole and we need to go get him"

"And what if I don't, what then Sonny?" she's angry at being bullied like this although Sonny hits a nerve about Clay. They're looking at each other eye to eye.

Davis is standing next to Ray in the doorway watching after she heard all the shouting and Sonny's raised voice. C.J contemplates her next move. She smiles at Sonny and he knows exactly what she's thinking

"Say it! Go on say it!" he goads her. She closes her eyes and bites her lip. She's this close to letting Sonny's secret out "But ask yourself will that help Clay or just make you feel better cos you caused more trouble?"  
He shakes his head, clenching his fists. It takes all his concentration to restrain himself "You gonna get him killed cos of your stupid games. Cos you two can't keep it in your pants for five minutes and then piss each other. So fine...go ahead, say it if you think that will make everything better or will it just make you more of bitch than you are already?"

Jason and Ray look at each other confused. Davis gulps nervously. She's worried Sonny's gonna push her too far and she's going to say it.

CJ rubs her head, it aches, and she closes her eyes for a moment, she doesn't like being put under pressure like this "Fine!"

She takes the packet and pushes the tablet out of the blister pack then she puts the pill in her mouth and gulps it down with the glass of water. As she swallows it cause her anger to boil over and she throws the empty glass at the wall

 _Arrrgggghhhhh_! She screams, running her hand through her hair. "Happy now, are you?" she screams at him as her and Sonny exchange looks. He nods his head, smiling as he looks up at Davis. He knows just how close they just came to being revealed.

She wipes her angry tears away and takes a deep breath composing herself after her outburst "Now can I see my son?" she puts her hand to her mouth still trying to control her emotions.

"Yeah!" Jason nods as he lets out a sigh of relief. For a minute he thought he had pushed it too far and might have jeopardized Clay further. He looks at her, he can see how upset she is, how much it took for her to take that tablet and he does have a momentary pang of guilt for being so hard on her. He heads to the kitchen to get JC.

She shakes her head at him. She can't believe he manipulated her like, she's so angry with him. He went behind her back getting that test. Inside she's struggling, her emotions and anger a mixed combination. But she needs to get in back in control, holding her tears back she won't let them see her cry again.

"Hey baby" She smiles "How you doing?" Large tears drop from her eyes despite her best try, she can't control them as she holds him close. But his little face folds and he cries reaching his arms out for Jason. "No, no. Shhh! Shhh! Mommy's got you" she cuddles and kisses him, but he will not stop crying "So do I get a moment alone with him?"

"Not on your own. No!"

"What the... Seriously?" She gasps "Jason, what? I can't be on my own with my own son?" she frowns "Jason, why are you being like this?" she wonders where all this hate has come from since last night

"Jace brother..." Ray now does step in " seriously man, we're all here!" he looks giving him a warning that even he thinks he's going too far with this now.

"Okay.." Jason sighs and relents "Okay, sorry you're right. But we'll be in the kitchen. You don't leave this room!" he warns her. He still doesn't trust her, especially now he pushed her into a corner. She rolls her eyes, but she has to accept that's the best she's going to get right now.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason looks at his watch he's given her half an hour and comes through to pick him up "Naima has to go now"

"Hey No! No, not yet. Jason... please, please Jason a bit longer?" she tips her head on one side and appeals to him. Giving him that look he knows so well from over the years when she wants something. She has him on his own now "Jason, why are you being like this, after last night. I thought.."

"Sorry, but they've gotta go!" he pauses "And last night, it shouldn't have happened, I should have known better with Clay still missing. That's my priority. That's what I should have been concentrating on"

"And you're taking that out on me? Because... You gave into your emotions. Fine! Right, well I mean it was just sex, no big deal!" she shrugs "but this could be the last time I see him, so just give me a damn minute!"

"Seriously?" He frowns as he looks at her "What? CJ, that's how you're thinking? That you're never gonna see him again" it never crossed his mind that's where her head was. To be honest he hadn't considered how she might feel at all.

She shrugs "Who knows. I don't know what Reuben will do, but um... well I can't imagine he's planned for me just to walk out of there, when I give him that file"

Jason's taken aback he never considered this was one of her fears "CJ, we're not gonna let that happen" he shakes his head "We're gonna get Clay and we gonna bring you _both_ home!" he has to keep telling himself that's the plan. He doesn't want to imagine any other scenario

She nods she's not sure if she believes him that it will happen like that. "Yeah, yeah that's what I hope to"

 _Shit!_ he can't believe what he's done "Sorry...oh god I'm so sorry" He wraps his arms round her and J.C all he wants to do is help her and keep them both safe.

.


	41. Chapter 41

**Chapter 41: Dinner!**

Naima's at the door set to leave with the children. She kisses Ray and holds him tight. "Ray be careful" she looks at him, worried. Not that she isn't worried normally just this time with all the tensions running high she feels on edge.

"I will. Don't worry" He reassures her. She's giving him this look like she wants to say something but isn't sure whether to or not "What? " he frowns

"Look, you know I don't like her Ray and that's always been true" he looks away wondering what she wants him to say to that statement "No hear me out. But I think Jason should ease up on her" Ray's not looking at her and she pulls his chin around to make him acknowledge her "Ray, she's not in a good place. And well…I couldn't imagine losing my child, can you?" she keeps staring at him

"No" he nods as he has to agree with her. He gives her a long last cuddle "You're right, as always" he smiles and kisses her head, then turns to his daughter "Be good for Mommy and I'll see you soon"

"Love you Daddy"

Naima smiles at him. As she leaves and he watches them all walk down the path.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Trent and Sonny are standing around not saying anything. CJ's sitting with her head in her hands, while Jason is picking up the broken pieces of the glass that she smashed earlier. Ray enters the room and looks around at them all.

C.J looks up and seeing him come back, this time without the children, it hits her like an emotional wall. Jaycee is gone. She shakes her head just about holding her composure and knowing her emotions are swamping her she gets up and goes to the kitchen.

Pouring herself a glass of water, quietly staring out of the window. She's not looking at anything just fighting to hold back her tears.

Trent enters the room behind her "C.J"

"What?" She doesn't look at him. She doesn't want to speak to him or anyone for that matter

"I just need to um…" he waits but she still doesn't respond "I need to make sure you understand about not drinking with those tablets" he waits "CJ are you listening to me? It's really important that you don't. I should have gone through all of the side effects with you but… well Jason insisted"

She ignores him and keeps staring out the window

"CJ say you're listening?" he sighs at the wall of silence " Okay well I am warning you. Even one drink will be enough to make you ill" He stands watching her but still she won't even look at him "Alright fine, don't answer me but just don't say I didn't tell ya"

She wipes a tear from her cheek then finally turns to look at him. She doesn't say anything. He shakes his head pitifully; he doesn't like being at odds with her but what can he do.

Jason's now stood in the doorway watching them "What's wrong?"

"Nothing" Trent sighs "I'll leave you to it."

"Hey!" Jason takes a much softer tone with her now

"Jason leave me alone, I don't wanna hear it"

"C'mon, I'm sorry okay. I'm only doing this for the best"

"The _BEST?_ " she laughs "NO! No, you're not, you're doing this for you! Cos Jason Hayes has to be in control" She's angry and she turns on him angrily. It takes all her effort to suck back her emotions and tears. The more she looks at him the angrier she gets "I don't know you anymore, Jason. I thought I did, but I can't believe you went behind my back like that"

"I'm sorry" he sighs an apology "No actually you know what, I'm not sorry. CJ I had to know, if he was my son" her attitude is starting to frustrate him now.

She wipes her nose on the back of her hand and as a large tear rolls down her cheek she abruptly wipes it away. Finding it difficult to swallow her emotions without breaking down "You humiliated me in there!" she shakes her head looking at him "What would you have done if he hadn't been yours? Then what."

"But he was, and you knew that. Clay told me. So weren't you honest with me" He stands in front of her just staring at her.

"Oh, just leave me alone!" she pushes him back

"I can't do that, and you know it " He wraps his arms round her and just for a second she lets him. Then she gets angry again shoving him back. She pushes and pushes against him, fighting with him in frustration "Fuck you Jason" she screams, letting go of her pent-up emotions "Why…why would you treat me like this" _Urggghh!_ "I hate you!"

He takes it, doesn't say a word as she stands there sobbing trying to push him away until, finally she can't anymore she leans her forehead against his chest. He pulls her towards his body, wrapping his arms around her, resting his chin on her head as he closes his eyes "Shit! How the hell did it get to this?"

Hearing her cry out Sonny's at the doorway watching them. He's angry "You know as nice as all these feels might be this is not getting us on to fixing Clay's situation" he's chewing his gum, frustrated by the two of them, he just want to get on to finding Clay "I think we've waited long enough for her to sort her shit out, don't you. Time to stop this bullshit"

"Yeah!" Jason nods at him "Yeah Sonny, we hear ya"

She wipes her nose on her hand again then gathering herself as much as she can "Sonny's right we need concentrate on getting Clay back!" She takes a breath "I need that file Jason"

He nods and then with some hesitation he pulls his key chain from his pocket. He unclips the flash drive from the keyring and holds it out to her.

She takes a deep breath which she lets out slowly " _Phew!_ There it is." she smiles as she looks Jason in the eyes, nodding reluctantly, she closes her hand around it .

"That it?" Sonny frowns confused "That's why they took Clay? For that! …Jeez!" he sighs "Right, then let's get this bullshit done with and go find him."

She rubs her head then pushes past him the doorway "Where you going?" Jason frowns at her sudden movement

"I'm just gonna clean-up"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She closes the door and shuts herself in the bathroom. She leans both hands on the sink, looking herself in the mirror. Her face crumbles and she starts crying again. Her ribs ache, her heart hurts and she has huge tense knot in her stomach.

Sitting herself on the floor with her back against the wall, she focuses herself. The crying stops and she sits in silence, thinking about Clay, thinking about that room and his wound she patched and the smell. The smell in that room it won't go away. The same as Damascus she can smell it again. "Oh shit!"

She can feel her anxiety building and taking a deep breath she concentrates on the flash drive he holds in her hand. Taking her cell phone from her pocket and with slow deliberate breaths, she calms herself enough to be able to speak.

She stands up, again looking at herself in the mirror then she presses call on the contact in her phone "Yeah…. it's me!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay starts to come around. He's not in good shape, he aches and his head's a dizzy blur. He tries to roll over on to his back to get some more sleep but it's just too painful and he stays where he is. He listens. He can hear what sounds like Reagan having a conversation on the phone.

"Yes… …I'm sure I can get it. …. No!...Yes, it's going to plan" he looks around behind him and he can see that Clay's awake "I've got to go!"

"Mr Spenser, you're awake. How fortunate. How are you feeling today?"

"Go to hell!" Clay barely manages to answer him.

"Now, now that's not very nice" Reagan crouches down over him "You know, Mr Spenser I'm curious about something. I want to know what all the fascination with her is. I mean she must be something special, right? Ms Lewis, I mean she has you and even Reuben at her beck and call. Tell me, why is that?" he sniffs but Clay doesn't answer him "You don't know?" he laughs "Hmmm! Well maybe I'll have to find out for myself."

Clay's anger is rising. The pictures of Reagan grabbing CJ on the floor flash in his head. Right now, he can hardly move let alone do anything though.

"Maybe I missed my chance, the other day, when I had her on the floor. What do think Mr Spenser, perhaps I should have taken my chance to find out then?" Clay doesn't respond if he wasn't in a such a bad way he'd show him what he thinks "You have nothing to say? Never mind" Reagan gets up, as he does he kicks his boot hard, into Clay's stomach.

Clay doubles in half as he cries out in pain. _Aahhhhh_ _!_ _Fuckkk!_ He takes deep breaths as the pain rips through his body.

Reagan looks at him, laughing as he walks away.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Catherine, at last! I thought we might not ever speak again. I trust you're well?"

"Reuben stop with the bullshit. Where and when?" she sighs Whilst his accent and his way of talking might have worked on her once but now his smarmy attitude just makes her angry.

He laughs "Well I take it you have what I want, in _your p_ ossession now?"

"It's safe. Yes. And Clay he's still okay?"

"He's tough. He's holding up"

"What does that mean? Reuben…" she nervously bites her lip "is he alright? Please you don't need to hurt him anymore. I've got what you want."

"Yes, I know, unfortunately for Mr Spenser, people are getting impatient. That's all."

"So how do you want to do this?" she sighs "We need to get it done"

"Dinner!"

"What?!" she's frowns, confused by his answer

"I want you to have dinner with me. You can bring the file."

"I don't understand" She's silent for a moment "What the fuck, I'm not having dinner with you. Reuben, this is not a game. I'm serious I want Clay back"

"Well, it's one of the terms of my negotiation"

"Stop the bullshit this isn't a negotiation; this is an exchange. I give you the file you give me Clay back. That's it... no more games! I'm not playing"

"I don't think so" he laughs "This is on my terms now. I have what _you_ want and in exchange for that I want the file and I want dinner with you. When I get those two things you will get Mr Spenser back"

"Reuben …" She's thinking about what he said " I'm _not_ going to have dinner with you, be serious. That can't happen!" she lowers her voice, conscious of not being heard from the guys outside. She opens the bathroom door to check no one can hear her "You know that's not how this works"

"Well, that's how I want it to work. Catherine, have you ever negotiated a hostage exchange?"

"No! Well not exactly" she's confused by the comment "What that's got to do with anything?" his game playing is frustrating her now

"Well, they can be long drawn out affairs. This one doesn't have to be like that. You just have to have dinner"

"Stop!" She's angry now " Stop playing games! I'm _NOT g_ oing to have dinner with you... I can't" she's frowns, rubbing her head as she tries to work out what he's playing at, wondering if he's stalling for some reason "I want to know Clay's still alive?"

"He's very much alive. Well for now."

Her phone pings a video message and she opens it. Taking a breath as she sees the video of Clay "What the hell have you done to him?"

"Yes, I'm Sorry about that but Reagan, you know his a little more hot headed than his brother. It's harder to control him. He um…he gets a little carried away at times. That why I'm sure you'll understand the need to hurry this along. I'm not going to be able hold him back much longer"

She closes her eyes remembering Reagan grabbing her in that room. She's trying to stay calm "I'll give you the file but won't have dinner with you. Beside Jason would never agree to that" she laughs.

"I'm sure you'll think of a way to convince him or maybe just don't tell him. It's your call!"

"This is total bullshit, Reuben. Just tell me where Clay is?" there's no response and the phone goes dead as the call cuts off "Reuben? … Reuben? Shit!" She sighs frustrated as he ends the call.

"Shit! Shit!" she bangs the phone against her head looking at the ceiling in frustration as she tries to think what to do "Oh shit, now what?... Fuck!"

Calling the number back, it goes straight to voice mail "Reuben call me back NOW!"  
She looks around, scratching her head wondering what she's going to do, she panics pacing in the limited bathroom space

***Bleep*** bleep*** **Text: The Marina Bar 18:00 come alone**

 _SHIT!_ she sighs her minds a blur _What the fuck am I going to do?_ She's wondering what to tell the guys. Jason's' going to be expecting a time and location to go get Spenser and now Reuben's playing games.

"CJ?" there's a knock on the bathroom door. It makes her jump and she takes a deep intake of breath "You okay in there? You've been in there a while"

"Yeah sure…I'm fine! Give me a minute I'm just coming" she takes a deep breath, composing herself before she opens the bathroom door. She smiles at Jason he's stood there outside the door.

"You okay?" he frowns "What're you doing?"

"Nothing. I'm fine."

Jason looks at her suspiciously seeing her phone in her hand "Did you call him?"

Sonny's there in the hallway watching them, he's holding a beer and she can smell it She also wonders where he got it from knowing Jason cleared the house out of alcohol "Yeah, yeah I did"

"And… c'mon what did he say?"

"He's playing with us! We just have to wait for him to call back with a location and time" she lies

Sonny crushes the beer can " _FUCK!_!" he's so angry he points at CJ waving his finger in her face accusing but he's too angry to say anything

"I'm sorry. I tried, really I did. It's how he is, he likes to play games. He likes to be in control. We just have to play it his way" she gulps and closes her eyes wondering what to do next "Clay will be fine. They know they won't get the file if any further harm comes to him"

"If he's even alive now" Sonny hangs his head

"He is… alive I mean" she shows them the video

"God damn! Look the state of him You wait till I get my hands on them"

"Cool it Sonny!" Jason's watching her. "You know my gut says something's not right with this. I can smell it"

"He wants this file. He'll come around. We just need to sit tight, I told you it's just a control thing." 

"Give it here!" Jason puts his hand out "You know what I think I'll hang on to that, for now"

she looks at his open hand and frowns "Jason… what?" she searches his face trying to make sense of where he's coming from "Why? Look, I've got this. Seriously I have. Don't you trust me"

"No! No, somethings off " he's trying to read her body language and he can tell she's covering something "Clay's life depends on this thing. It's my job to protect him and that's what I'm doing" he gestures for her to hand it over. She swallows and then reluctantly she hands it back to him . "Okay!" he looks at Sonny "We'll go back to the base in a bit and gear up. _You…_ you'll stay here!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She sighs as she watches the guys out in the garden, talking. She's not sure what the conversation is but she can be sure her name's coming up. They have beer. She can see the half open packs they've left on the small table in the living room. There's three left in one pack that's open. She stares at them sitting on the table. She looks through the window keeping an eye on the guys.

Letting out a deep sigh _Just one small beer wouldn't hurt would it? Surely after everything today, just one?_ Trent's warning word flashes across her head as she dares to open a tin.

 _Oh, it's small beer it can't possibly hurt._ The smell wafts in her nostrils as she puts the can to her lips and again she questions herself _It'll be okay. Those tablets probably don't even work anyway_ but still what Trent said play around and around in her head as apprehensively she drinks. _Oh, fuck it!_ She knocks back the rest of the can without stopping. Aware of the guys outside and keeping one eye on the window the whole time.

She hides the empty tin in the trash, pushing it down to the bottom and covering it over Then returns to the couch and puts the TV on.

She's re-reading Reuben's text, watching the video of Clay. She rubs her head and sighs _Shit , what the hell am I going to do?_ She lays there quiet, closing her eyes for a few moments of peace.

Suddenly she sits up wondering what happened she looks at her watch. She must have slept for at least twenty minutes. She frowns the table is empty of beers, the guys have been bac and taken them.

Her mouth feels so dry and as she sits up she feels hot, her cheeks flushed. _Pheww!_ She sighs. She feels dizzy and rubs her head. _Oh god!_ Something's wrong and she tries breathing slowly but it's no good, she realizes she's going to be sick.

Rushing to the bathroom, leaning over the pan she throws up. She can't stop. Resting her head in her hands, leaning against the toilet she keeps retching

"CJ ?" She looks up as she hears Jason knock on the door "CJ, are you okay in there?" He frowns for a moment he's concerned when she doesn't answer "CJ?! What are you doing?"

"Don't come in here!" she manages to get out before her stomach heaves again "I'm okay!" she's not and she retches again. This time he can hear her, and he can tell somethings wrong. He pushes on the handle and opens the door

"What the hell's going on?" He sees her sitting on the floor by the toilet pan "You okay? he frowns worried "You sick?"

She nods "Just go!" she leans over her stomach churns again

"I'll get Trent"

"NO! No, don't..." she doesn't get to finish her sentence before she throws up again. It's too late anyway Trent's already at the doorway

"What's wrong?"

"She's sick!"

"CJ?" He frowns "CJ I need to ask you, did you drink something?"

She shakes her head, lying. He looks at Jason he doesn't believe her

"I think she's had some alcohol.. a drink of something It's a reaction to the Antabuse she took earlier. I told her, warned her this would happen."

"CJ is Trent right, did you drink something?"

She still shakes her head "it ll pass I'm fine .. just go !" She retches again and again "please just leave me alone!"

"The beers… the beers that were on the table. Sonny how many empty cans?" they gather up the empty cans they drank

"Ten!"

"So where are the other two?"

"There's the one I had I put in the trash" Sonny remembers from earlier. Jason opens the trash can and searches he pulls out two cans _Shit!_ He rubs his head "This is out of control now! How the hell do we stop this Trent"

Trent shakes his head " I don't know but I warned her. I knew she didn't take me seriously"

"Will she be okay?" Jason frowns as he looks at his watch. "Jesus, we need her functioning properly. Eric's never gonna go for this is we don't sort her out"

"Yeah, I mean she only had one dose and it's a small beer, low strength. Couple hours and it should pass. She will be alright"

"This is all we need, we don't have time for this" he rubs his head "You know this is my fault, I should have never left them on the table"

"Perhaps she'll learn now?" Sonny frowns as he watches her still throwing up. He has no sympathy in fact he gets angry again that they're wasting time. He takes a deep breath then turns the shower on to the cold and without warning he hoists her to her feet. Taking her by the scruff of her neck he forces her head under the water

"FUCK!" She coughs and splutters, fighting against him "Sonny STOP!" She claws his hands with her nails as he continues to hold her under the water. "STOP!" she screams out. She's choking, coughing as the water gets in her throat

Jason hearing the noise is at the doorway "Hey Sonny! What the hell are you doing?" he pulls him back and turns the water off as she collapses onto the floor still coughing up the water.

"I'm tired of all this bullshit!. See needs to wake up and we need Clay back"

Jason's worried his number three is losing it now, he's so angry. "Sonny get yourself together. Pack your gear up, we're going back to the base. Trent you sort her out?"

Jason sighs, he angrily grinds his teeth as he tries to keep his emotions in check. Just when he thinks he has this situation in control she does something like this, and he still wants to know what went on with that call she made. He helps her to her feet and gives her a towel to dry her hair as they head "Sort yourself out!" He sighs as he leaves her and heads back into the living area.

Ray checks on her. She's standing, staring at herself in the mirror. The sickness has stopped. She just feels hot and shaky now.

"CJ…." Ray frowns at her ".. this needs to stop! "

"I know!" she nods her head "I know it does. I will .. I will sort it out, promise"

"I have no idea what happened to you, but you need help. If not… you're gonna lose everything you want" Ray passes her a towel as she washes her face "I don't know why he keeps giving you chances and we both know he cares deeply for you, but don't you see you're pushing him away, and soon … there'll be no going back"

Rays voice is kind and she smiles but holding back tears "I'm never gonna be any good for him Ray. You know that, Not while I'm like this anyway. I don't know how to fix it though." she's sniffs back the tears as she dries her face

"Then do us all a favour and when this is over, go get some help!" He looks at her looking for her reaction "If you love Jason, then you need to stay away from him, for his sake!"

"And my son, do I just walk away from him too?"

He shrugs "Well as hard as that might be. Yes. You'll have to.. Look um…Jason's got custody of him now anyway. So, just stay away or at least till you sort yourself out"

"You know I can't believe he did that" she closes her eyes shaking her head "I never thought he'd do something like that to me. Take my son from me"

"CJ, it was for the best" Ray's feeling sorry for her now "And the test, well he had to know. It was eating him up not knowing the truth"

She nods she's looking away from Ray as tears roll down her face. Trent's behind Ray in the doorway "She okay now?"

"Yeah she's good" Ray looks at her checking if she is

"Sickness stopped?" Trent frowns. She nods in response "You were lucky you only had one dose and that beer was small, I warned you this would happen"

She doesn't' say a word in reply just looks at him. Trent sighs, he never wanted it this way he knows they forced her into taking that tablet. He knew medically her head wasn't ready to go down this road, this fast. He already warned Jason that it was all too rushed, but he said they needed to do something. Clay was depending on keeping her sober and functioning, so they did this. "Just sleep for a couple hours, then you'll be fine"

Jason's at the door "Okay guys we need to wrap it up" he takes a sterner, more authoritative tone. His patience has run out "Let's go, Ray get geared up... as I said _you,_ stay here!"

Jason looks at her, but she doesn't say a word. He lets the bathroom door close behind him and she closes her eyes. She runs some water in the basin, looking in the mirror she takes a deep breath. _Oh fuck!_

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

As she leaves the sanctuary of the bathroom as they're getting ready to go "You stay put!" Jason warns her point his finger "We're going to base, see what intel Davis has pulled"

"Okay!" she nods

"Just have a sleep" Trent tries to give her some sympathy he hates them not being on good terms.

Sonny however doesn't care how she feels, and he still glares at her disapprovingly. She smiles. That look will never change. She'll never change how Sonny feels about her. How he hates her.

Ray, Jason and Trent are out the door. But before he leaves Sonny steps back towards her, hushing his voice so no one hears him. Hes angry "This is my final warning with you. We don't get Clay back, I'm coming for ya." he stares at her. "You do _whatever_ it takes, I don't care but you get that boy back, you understand me?"

"Yeah !" she nods. She knows he's serious. "I will, I'll find a way, I'll get him back I promise"

"You better... for your sake!" 

As they drive away she collapses onto the couch, tears streaming down her face, she pulls her hand through her hair as she picks up her phone, checking the text again and then the time on her watch. 14:00hrs. She sighs as she lays back. She's tired and she closes her eyes.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The guys arrive at the base and Jason goes to see Davis.

"How we doing with those satellite traces?"

"No luck they're all blank. It's weird, it's like someone wiped that period of time out"

"What?" Jason frowns

"He probably did" Mandy interrupts "I'm just saying if they have, been wiped. Reuben, he'd have the contacts to do it."

Davis frowns "How? How could he wipe satellite sweep? No way, that would take, serious security clearance. That's like black ops stuff"

Mandy raises her eyebrows "But he could do it!"

Jason shakes his head _Shit!_ "So, now we gotta wait for him to make the call" he rubs his head he doesn't like this not being in control "Davis, I need a word" He hands her a piece of paper with a cell phone number on it "I need a favor, between you and me"

"Sure, whatever just ask!"

"I need you to put a trace on this phone"

"Um… sure" she frowns "I'll see what I can do. Can I ask who's it is?"

"It's um… the one C.J has. I need to know if she leaves the house. If she does, then I need to know where she goes"

"Okay, but isn't that a little over the top?"

"No! She's up to something. I don't know what, but I want to find out."


	42. Chapter 42

**Chapter 42** **: I want, you!**

C.J wakes. 16:00hrs She checks her phone as she lays back on the couch looking up at the ceiling. After few moments, gathering her thoughts she sits up.

 _Pheww!_ She sighs still wondering how she's going to sort his problem. She decides before anything else that she needs a shower. She still feels pretty lousy but at least she's not being sick. _Definitely not taking any more of those tablets, they can forget that!_

She's studies herself in the mirror, while she dries herself. While shes stood there her phones receives a call _Jason!_ She lets out a big sigh before she answers "Hey!"

"Hey, just checking in. You Okay?"

"Yeah just getting out of the shower" She thinks a minute before she speaks "I um…I have to go out for a bit and get some stuff"

"Stuff? What stuff?"

"Just girl's stuff. Toiletries and things"

"I'll get Davis to sort something. Just stay put."

"No. No, I can manage for myself, please I need some air. I'm going stir crazy sat her. I promise, I won't be long. Just to the store and back"

"Okay" he hesitates. He's apprehensive. He really doesn't want her to go but there's not much he can do to stop her "Fine, just don't go too far. You heard anything yet?"

"No!" She gulps and lies "No, nothing from Reuben yet. I'll call you as soon as he calls me"

"Alright, well we need to be ready to go after Clay when he calls"

"Yeah. Okay well, I'll see you in a while" She hangs up _Shit!_ She rubs her through her hair. She hopes he'll leave her alone now, well at least for a while.

She gets dressed, sitting on the bed, thinking about Reuben, and what she should do _Okay! Dinner? Fine I can do dinner!_

She looks at her combats and the tee shirt she's about to put on "Better get myself something to wear I can't go to dinner in these" She picks up the spare keys, her wallet and phone, then leaves.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"How's that trace on that phone?"

"Yeah I got it. Just one call from you. I appears she's still local. Maybe she's at the store like she said?"

"Okay! Just keep an eye on it. Let me know ASAP if anything changes"

"Will do"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She takes a deep breath before she knocks on the door _Shit what are you doing here?_ She paces the hallway back and forward, thinking about leaving but as she takes another deep breath she knocks again. Closing her eyes for a moment she waits as Naima opens the door

"Oh, um….CJ? What are you doing here?" she frowns, this is the last person she expected it to be "You know you shouldn't be here"

"No, I know but um… can I come in, just for a minute."

"No. No, I don't think that's not a good idea. Look, does Jason know you're here?"

"No!" She shakes her head "No you know he doesn't" she pauses swallowing hard "Please, I just need to Jaycee, just for a minute. I won't stay"

"I can't…really I'm sorry. You know he asked me not to let you come here"

"Please? Naima, Please, one Mom to another. This might be the last time I ever get to see him"

Naima stands thinking "CJ, I can't. Please don't ask me. You need to leave" everything inside her says No don't agree to this but as Jaycee cries out and CJ looks at her pleading. She relents. Debating with her conscience she reluctantly nods her head and opens the door. She does understand, as a Mom "Okay but please you can't stay long"

"I know. Thank you" She takes a breath; this is hard as she watches him playing with the toys on the rug on the floor "Oh…hey baby!" She has to hold her tears back as she picks him up and cuddles him close _Pheww!_ She sighs trying desperately not to cry. "Thank you. Thank you for this!"

Naima picks up her own child, RJ and calls her daughter "Jameelah , come help Mommy in the kitchen"

"Why's JC's Mommy here?" she asks as Naima looks at CJ

"Um…she's just come to see him. It's Okay baby!" She smiles at her daughter reassuring her or is she reassuring herself. She's worried, concerned that maybe she shouldn't have let her in. Worried now about going against everything Jason said. She's also concerned in her head _What if she tried to snatch him?_ _She realizes there'd be no way she could stop her, physically. CJ being much too strong for Oh! What have I done?_ She wonders about calling Ray, but she convinces herself it will be alright.

CJ sits with him on the floor. "Thank you for this. I won't tell Jason but thank you" she nods and smiles "I know this must be hard. I mean, I know you don't like me, and I suppose there's good reason" she smiles

Naima nods it is hard seeing her there having to tolerate her that is true "Yeah well, you hurt a lot of people with what you did"

"I know but um… you have to understand, it wasn't just me"

"Oh, I know everything! I know exactly what happened" Naima sneers at her, she can feel her dislike turning to anger "You used everyone, so it was all you! I know how you cheated; on Jason I know all about that!"

CJ frowns "What? You know what?"

"Oh yes! I know what happened, what you did!"

"You do?" CJ gulps _Shit! Does she really know about that?_ "What, you mean Ray told you?" She frowns, confused wondering why Ray would tell anyone let alone his wife. "Look I'm so sorry. That really was a big mistake one that shouldn't have happened. I really do regret it" she sighs "If I could take it back, I would, I swear! Naima, I am so sorry. I didn't know you knew but I have to tell you we were just so drunk. Neither of us knew what we were doing that night. I know it's no excuse but it's the only one I have"

"No" Naima shakes her head "No Ray never said anything" Naima frowns "Alana did"

"Oh! Um…" Now CJ's confused "Oh, sorry I don't understand Alana told you, I mean how did… how did Alana know?"

"How do you think? Jason told her! What you did, it seriously hurt everyone. You stole her husband and then you cheated on him like he was nothing, like their marriage meant nothing! You destroyed their marriage and then you didn't want him. Like a game" she shakes her head "He meant so little after he gave you what you wanted, left his wife, his children and you… you just slept with someone else like it was nothing"

CJ's still confused "What?… I didn't think Jason knew?" she thought this was about her and Ray. Jason never knew or so she thought. Maybe Sonny did tell him, and Jason never said anything to protect Ray? Her head is trying to make some sense of this. "Sorry I'm confused Jason was never nothing. If I could take back what I did, I would. I was just hurt and confused that night, had too much to drink...Oh my god! I was so drunk that night. Just it never should have happened"

"What are you talking about?"

CJ see's the confusion on Naima's face "I don't know. Wait, I think we've got confused here. Look, just drop it. We seem to have got crossed wires. It's in the past" she smiles and tries to laugh it off "I'm not sure about anything at the moment. My heads all over the place. Just forget it"

"Wait … Ray knew?"

"Um…no! No, I don't think so… look just forget the whole thing. Like I said it's in the past. it's done"

"You said, did Ray tell me? So, _did_ he know?"

"You know what, I think I need to go. I have to be somewhere" she stands up

Naima stands in front of her "Did something happen?" she looks her in the eyes "something with you and Ray?"

"No!" she shakes her head lying

"You're lying! Oh… my …god! It did!" Naima looking her full in the face "Oh MY God, did you sleep with my husband?" Suddenly it all fits into place "Is that who you cheated on Jason with and that's why Ray said he never knew who you left with that night! Oh my god. That's it. I can see it in your face"

CJ closes her eyes she tries to think of a lie to tell "It wasn't like that." she swallows hard "He loves you, Naima he's always loved you, please don't ever doubt that" she takes a deep breath "It was nothing, I was nothing. It was just a stupid, drunken mistake. He regrets it so much. We both do. It didn't mean anything, for either of us. We hated ourselves for it"

"Oh my God! I can't believe you are saying this!" Naima's face is full of hurt and disappointment "My husband meant nothing to you, but you slept with him!"

Oh shit! "Look, it was drunken sex. That was it. There was nothing in it" CJ slowly shakes her head apologizing "We both knew it was a mistake the moment it happened"

"GET OUT!... GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!" Naima screams just before she slaps CJ hard in the face "You can't help yourself can you? Always gotta have what's not yours. Alana said you were a bitch and she was right. Oh….I can't believe this!"

"Naima please! Naima what are you going to do?"

"That's none of your damn business"

"He loves you, don't do this to him. Don't say anything you might regret, Please!"

"Don't tell me what to do **….** **GET OUT!"**

CJ nods and takes a deep breath as she kisses Jaycee goodbye "Take care of him please."

"Oh, don't worry I'll look after Jason's child, that's not a problem, but you don't ever come here again. _EVER,_ do you hear. I don't want to see you, speak to you NEVER!"

CJ nods again "I understand. But for what it's worth, I am sorry" as leaves she looks back at her son on the floor. Tears filling her eyes.

She's stood in the corridor Naima follows her to the door "Go to hell!"

The door slams shut behind her and the corridor is silent. Silent except for the muffled crying of Naima the other side of the door.

Oh fuck! CJ sighs as she leans against the wall in the corridor. This is not what she needed on top of everything else. She pulls her hands through her hair. She can't think _Pheww_! _Breath CJ breath._ She looks at her watch _Shit!_

 **17:20hrs.**

She rubs the ache in her ribs "Oh god…." wondering what to do. She takes another deep breath _Okay, get it together. Think about Clay now!_ her breathing slows.

She's out in the street and she flags down a cab. "Marina bar please"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Um… Jason" Davis leans against the door of his cage as he sits there, getting dressed "Can I have a word?"

"Yeah sure" he frowns. He can see the concerned look on her face "Davis, what is it?"

"So, I tracked that phone, the number you gave me. CJ.."

"Yeah, and?"

"Um...well it looks like she went somewhere. She um… she went to Ray's?"

"Ray's?" Jason looks up at her confused. "You sure?" As she nods he sits there thinking "Why would she go there?" _Oh Shit!_ He grabs his truck keys from the shelf "I need to go! She's going after JC"

"You need back up? Should I get someone"

"No! No, I'll call if I do! I'll deal with her. Oh, and Davis, keep this between us for now"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

**18:05hrs**

She looks at her watch as she straightens the knee length black dress that she's wearing. Before she goes to the restaurant to meet him she takes a moment in the bathroom.

Looking in the mirror she pulls her hair back in a tight ponytail and lets out a long sigh.

 _Oh, what the hell are you doing here?_ she shakes her head. This feels such a bad idea but what else choice does she have. They need to get Clay back.

The Maître d' stops her at the entrance to the restaurant "Can I help, madam?"

"I'm um…I'm meeting a friend, a Mr.. Ro…" she stops for a minute wondering what name Reuben will have used "Mr Rob…."

"Catherine!" Reuben stands up at his table as she arrives

She smiles at the waiter and points "I guess we're over there. Thanks" She takes a breath as she stands at the table "Reuben" she acknowledges him with no sign of emotion

"Catherine" He smiles "Please sit" He gestures to the chair opposite him "You look very nice. You choose this for me?"

She ignores his comments, pulling out the chair she sits down "What is this Reuben?"

"Dinner. What else would it be?"

"Nothing, there is nothing else. Do you understand that, what happened before...that is not that happening again!"

"Shame, but of course. You know I would never force you, always only ever what you consent to. Come now Catherine, relax it's just dinner" he smiles "What would you like to drink? Wine? Shall I order wine?"

"Um … No! No, I'll have a sparkling water" she gulps. As much as she wants the wine she daren't take the risk again.

"Are you sure?" he frowns at her "That's not like you"

"I need to keep a clear head around you"

"What because you might be tempted by my charm, you mean"

"No that's not what I mean. I'm not playing your games this time Reuben"

The waiter brings the drinks and the menus He smiles "Thank you .So…what did you tell Mr Hayes…about coming here?"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason knocks on the apartment door "Naima!...It's Jason" he knocks again "Naima... open the door" Eventually she does come to the door and he can tell she's been crying "What's happened? Has she been here?"

Naima nods

"Is Jaycee alright? Did she take him?"

"No!" she points to him sitting on the floor

"Oh, thank god!" he sighs in huge relief. His stomach was in knots on the drive there "I thought she was going to take him. This is why I told you not to let her near him. So.. what happened, what did she want?"

She shakes her head tears roll down her cheek. Jason frowns, he didn't mean to upset her he was just worried "Naima what happened? What did she do? Did she do something? Naima please tell me "

She's clearly upset he's trying to work out what's happened. Finally, tearfully Naima speaks "She slept with Ray!"

 _Shit!_ He closes his eyes. "I'm sorry!" he takes her in his arms and holds her while she sods  
"I know. I know" he shakes his head "It's okay! Oh god I can't believe she told you, why would she do that now? Naima listen to me; you have to believe me there was nothing in it. _NOTHING_. Ray loves you. You have to know he's a good man and he just got caught up in our mess, and I'm sorry for that"

"I don't think she meant to tell me; it just came out" she wipes the tissue on her nose. "Wait! Hold on...you knew?!"

"I didn't know, well not until very recently. Not when it happened, no!" he sighs "Me and Ray made our peace with it. It really was a mistake on his part, I know he regrets it so much"

In some ways he thinks it's probably best that all the secrets are out now, and he also thinks how close he came to telling Naima himself when he found out but still why the hell did that happen now with Clay missing, when he need Ray on his A game. "Can I ask what you're gonna do?"

She shrugs

"Naima, please don't let her come between you. It was long time ago and he loves you. Don't let her split up your family up"

"I have to talk to him about it, Jason."

"I know" he nods "and look, I know it's a lot to ask on my part but...but will you keep it until we get Clay back? Just I need Ray's head focused on that for now."

"I don't know if I can. I need to … "she cries again

"I know and really I wouldn't ask you to do this but...it's really, really important, Clay's life could depend on everyone being focused. Naima, she's caused enough damage and I can't change that, but we can make sure we get Clay back safely first"

She's not sure but reluctantly she nods "I can't promise but .. I'll try"

Jason wraps his arms round her and holds her. He looks at JC smiling "You know, he's the only good thing she's ever done" he closes his eyes holding her tightly against him, comforting her. He takes a deep breath "Where is she now? Did she say where she was going?"

"She left. Said she had somewhere to be. To be honest I wasn't in mood to be chatting with her so that's all I know"

"Okay.. well look I have to go... Are you going to be okay? .. can I get someone?"

"My mom's coming over"

"Alright, that's fine. You still okay to look after JC" He kisses Naima on the head "You can get past this, you're strong"

"We'll see, but yeah JC is fine. He's your son Jason and I'll take care of him, for you but Jason..." she looks him full in the face "you need to get that woman out of your life, out of everyone's lives. He doesn't need her in his life either"

"I know. I know, I need to cut ties with her. I realize that "

As Jason gets to the door to leave, Naima's mother arrives they exchange reluctant smiles "I gotta go" he smiles back at Naima, she's carrying JC he kisses him on the head "I'll see you soon"

She smiles and closes the door on him

Jason's in the corridor and takes out his phone "Davis it's me… Yeah everything's fine. That trace, does it show where she is now?"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"So… Catherine. What did you tell Jason about where you were going?"

"Nothing. I didn't. I didn't tell him"

He laughs as he raises his wine glass "So he doesn't know you're here? Well, well more secrets, more lies. You can't help it can you " He smiles at her.

"Not a secret, just for the best" she leans over the table "This is bullshit Reuben, and you know it. You're just stalling. One of your stupid control games. I want Clay back!"

"You sure you don't want a glass of wine?" he looks at her and he can see the dilemma in her eyes

"No! I'm fine I told you" she sighs "What do you want Reuben? Why are you doing this?"

"What do I want? Apart from the file. I want you!"

"You want what?" she laughs

"I will exchange Mr Spenser... for you"

She bites her lip staring at him. She frowns "For me what? What do you want, for me to sleep with you again"?

"You come with me, at your own consent, and I'll let Mr Spenser go"

"You're mad!" She shakes her head "It's not gonna happen, Jason will never allow that"

"Not his choice. I told you, at your consent" he smiles at her

"What the hell is this?

"Oh, come on Catherine, we were good together once, we could be good again. We could be powerful, rich. We have the list; we could get anything we want! I know how much you love being in control. We could control everything."

She laugh's "You're unbelievable. How is me being with you getting what I want?"

"Can I ask you something?" He sighs a long thoughtful sigh as he takes hold of her hand across the table "What do you see in him?"

"Who?" she frowns

"Hayes, why him. Why are you so in love with him? I mean come on, you're intelligent, smart, ferocious when you want to be, ruthless" he smiles "So what does a knuckle dragger like him do for you ? I mean is all about the sex, because from what I understand other than that all you do is fight with each other. Is there something about him, a quality I can't see"

"What?!" she frowns confused by his comments "Stop this! Me and Jason, it's none of your damn business. It's complicated, but I know I don't love you"

"But you did. You did love me, once. We'll you loved the power I brought you."

She laughs "Reuben me and you, that was long time ago and it wasn't love. It was sex! And that's all it was"

"Oh, come on, we were so much more than sex. Though I have to say that was pretty damn good." He smiles at her and she pulls her hand away as he relaxes back in his chair "We had a good thing going. You loved the excitement, the danger of the things that we did"

"What we did. Yeah...yeah we pushed it to the edge. People got hurt, for god sake people got killed Reuben!" She shakes her head "At the end of the day, the way I see it was just sex"

"Great sex though!" He smiles. She shakes her head in disbelief "I'll bet it was more adventurous than what you get now. He doesn't look very adventurous"

"I'm not discussing Jason with you. In fact, I'm leaving, this is going nowhere! I want Clay back!"

"Oh yes Mr Spenser. Was he good in bed too? I hear you and he had quite a thing going on" she ignores him, and he smiles at her "Fine don't discuss it. But you know my terms you want him back then … you come and be with me."

"Go to hell Reuben… I not….." as she looks around there's a large shadow of a person standing beside the table

"So…." the chair next to her pulls out from under the table ".. what are we ordering?"

"Jason!" CJ gasps, she goes pale as he sits down next to her. "What the … I don't understand" she's lost for words as she frowns at him " Why are you here?"

"Why are you? Why are you here with him CJ?"

Reuben laughs, he's totally unfazed by Jason's presence and he leans back in his chair  
"Mr Hayes! What a nice surprise, please…. join us."

"Jason!" she's shocked beyond belief as she turns on Reuben "Did you set this up? Did you tell me I was here?"

"No, unfortunately, I can't say I did, but you know what now I see him sitting here, I so wish I had, the look on your face is priceless" he laughs and continues to sip his wine

"How the hell did you know I was here then?"

Jason doesn't take his eyes of Reuben. They just sit staring at each other across the table "Oh I have the means at my disposal. Oh, I may not be able block satellite images but…" He continues to stare at Reuben who just smiles "..I can get a phone traced"

"You tracked my phone?" she lets out a sigh in disbelief "Oh my god! What, you didn't trust me?"

Jason smiles angrily as he turns to face her "Oh, what and .. and this .. this should have been trusting you? You sitting here doing, god knows what, with him. And you didn't tell me. Sorry but what exactly _is_ going on here?"

She closes her eyes she knows he's right "I'm sorry alright. I should have told you I was meeting him but..." she can't believe now that she didn't' "I knew he was playing games and I thought... I thought I could sort it "

"You thought you could sort it, how? By sleeping with him again. Maybe one last time perhaps, then he might whisper where Clay is"

She shakes her head "No! No, that wasn't gonna happen. Jason. you have to believe me"

The waiter comes to the table "Are you ready to order?"

"Yeah, I'll have a beer" Jason smiles "Don't' know what they're drinking?"

"Oh, I'm fine" Reuben points at the wine bottle on the table. He's still smiling. He's loving the awkwardness of the situation. Jason picks up CJ's glass and takes a sip "Oh, surprise me, it is water! What you learn your lesson earlier"

She shakes her head "I can't believe you're doing this!"

"Looks like we're fine with a beer then." He smiles at the waiter "Thanks"

Reuben sits back pouring more wine into his glass "So as interesting as this is, tell me what can we do for you Mr Hayes?"

"You know what I should do?" Jason laughs "I should come over there a beat Clay's location out of you. That's what I should do but I don't think that'd be enough to get you to talk. Legally I'm not allowed to torture you but… you don't give me Clay back; well things can change. But one thing I'm not doing is playing your bullshit games. I'm more of an upfront type of guy. I just want my man back and in exchange I'll give you whatever you want"

"Really? _Whatever_ I want, you mean that?" he smiles "And you'll just hand it over, in exchange for Mr Spenser's release."

"The file yeah, and money whatever else you requested"

"and her? I can have her as well"

Jason goes silent as he frowns. He's puzzled by the request "Her? What do you mean her? You want CJ? Oh…oh, now we're getting to it. You want her, any reason or you just want what you can't have. You wanna control her. Yeah I see ...a guy like you, likes to control people, things"

For the first time Jason is starting to rile Reuben and his smiles drops and he leans forward across the table "Always Mr Hayes. Don't you?" he stares hard at Jason

Jason leans forward and grabs Reuben's tie yanking it hard "No gonna happen pal" Jason smiles

"Jason!" CJ removes his hand and looks around as people in the restaurant start to look over "Jason …stop! This isn't helping, so please let me deal with this"

Jason sighs and relaxes his grip, letting go. Reuben straightens his tie while staring angrily now "Ive made my request. I want the file and her. Otherwise its goodbye to your man!" Reuben leans back acting like he's not fazed by Jason's attitude.

"Really then you can say goodbye her, and your file. You're not getting either of them."

CJ closes her eyes and shakes her head she's worried about the game Jason's playing. She knows better than anyone Reuben's dangerous when backed into a corner

"Catherine, let me understand this. I thought you said you had the file now?" he looks at her

"Oh no, I still have it" Jason interrupts "See she ...she can't be trusted. She has this little habit of keeping secrets, telling lies. She can't help herself. You want that file... then you go through me. I don't get my man back then you don't get your file, it's that simple"

CJ looks away Jason's attitude is annoying her. The beer arrives and Jason sits back relaxed in his chair. He's acting as cool. Both men trying to not look rattled.

"You know what this is going nowhere" she looks at them both "You two playing alpha male It's not helping Clay! You know, I'm not some toy you pass back and forth between you" she frowns at them both "Reuben just gives us a place and time to get Clay and we'll give you the file. That's it, that's all you're getting"

"You can't see it can you?" He sighs "I'm trying to protect you Catherine" He sips his wine and leans forward "Other people want that file too. You come and be with me, everyone stays safe"

Jason drinks the beer and puts the empty bottle on the table "It's not gonna happen pal! The only thing you're getting is that file and _ONLY_ when I get Clay back" he stands up, grabbing CJ by the arm. "Get Up!" he pulls her up "You want that file then make the call, tell me where Clay is, but you get nothing else."

CJ gulps as Reuben glares at them "You're making a big mistake, Mr Hayes"

"Please…." CJs worried, she knows Reuben and she knows he won't just let this drop. "please Reuben. Just let Clay go! He's not part of this, so please let him go"

Jason puts his hand round the back of her neck and forcefully pushes her out of the restaurant.

As they disappear Reuben throws his napkin onto the table, drinks back the last of his wine. He leans back in his chair, rubbing his head. _Fuck!_ He grinds his teeth furiously. What just happened, Jason, it's made him angry. _Dammit!...Who the Hell does Hayes think he is?_

He picks up his phone "It's me. I need to step this up ... I need another video, something a bit more… persuasive, a last chance warning. Just.. don't kill him, not yet. Mr Hayes needs to know who's in control here. He needs reminding what's at stake. Send it to me when you're done!"

o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason walks her forcibly outside and around the corner of the building down the side alley where he shoves her back hard against the wall

 _Awww! Shit!_ She squeals but Jason shows no sympathy as she rubs her head which she just hit against the brickwork.

"What the hell did you think you were playing at, in there" he's fuming "Going there, meeting him. Did you want to be with him, is that what it is?"

"NO! No!... No Jason, please just let me explain, I just wanted to get Clay back"

"Oh please...please explain! Jesus!" he rubs his head "Oh and your little stunt with Naima, yeah that worked out real good" he shakes his head "Ray's gonna love you when he finds out what you told her!"

"What?" she sighs nervously "You didn't tell him did you?"

"No! No, I need his head in the game to get Clay back, but Naima will when it's all over, she will tell him." he shakes his head " Jeez CJ what the hell's wrong with you? Everywhere you go, there's trouble!"

"I'm sorry, okay! I am... I'm so sorry" she gulps. she puts her hand on Jason's chest trying to get him back on her side "Please…."

He's not having any of it as she stares at him "Please…" She pleads, leans back against the wall, reaching her hand up, placing it against the side of his face as she stares at him. Then she tries the only other thing she can think of right now, she leans forward and tries to kiss him "Jason...I'm sorry" her lips gently touch against his, and she brushes her hand across his chest "Jason…" she closes her eyes. They're nose to nose touching and she keeps kissing at him "I'm sorry... I'm so sorry... I am"

She keeps trying but he's not responding. He looks at her, shakes his head and pushes her against the wall, rejecting her "Don't! Don't, you've gone too far this time Jeez! I need my head examined being around you"

"Jason..." She's more forceful now, putting her hand around the back of his head looking him in the eyes, holding his head tight forcing him to look at her "Hey! C'mon, we'll sort this. I promise. I'll sort Reuben. I'll make him listen"

She leans in, kissing again and again. Smiling at him, trying to reassure him "I will... I promise. Trust me" she runs her hand round his face and neck. She looks him full in the eyes as one last try she puts her lips to his. This time against his better judgement, he can't resist her touch and he responds, kissing her back..

 _Mmmm!_ she smiles as he puts both hands either side of her body, against the wall, shoving her back, pushing himself against her. The feel of his groin hardness rubbing against her. She smiles to herself, shes won him around.

There's something about her touch he just can't resist. They're kissing each other, forcibly. His hand pulling at the hem of her dress, his hand up her thigh to the top lacy edge of her panties. Why is it the more they fight, the more he wants her. What the hell is it about he won't let her go.

She closes her eyes as he kisses down her neck as she lets out a soft breathless sigh _Aahhhhh!_

She stares up at the sky and smiles, while he continues to kiss her neck. She so relieved that finally she has him back on side.


	43. Chapter 43

**Chapter 43: Offer it up!**

"Okay..." Reagan smiles as he places his cell back in his jacket "now we're gonna have some _fun_ , Mr Spenser. Get him up!"

He moves the chair to the middle of the room and the tie Clay too it. Then taking the knife from his pocket he flicks out the blade.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

 _Awwww! Ahhhhh!_ CJ pants. Smiling as Jason thrusts himself hard against her, as she bounces her hips against his. His hands on her breasts pulling at them, kneading the flesh " _Ohhhh! Oh god!...Yes! Oh Yeah! ...Oh god Jason!…Mmmm!_ "

She frantically groans as in the final moments of her orgasm. She grinds hard against him until her whole body trembles and then she smiles, satisfied. Getting her breath she leans her chest against his and then kisses his lips. Her legs still astride his waist and he grips his hand tight on her hips pulling her against him until he's there at his peak and releases his wet warmth inside her.

Sitting up she smiles, teasingly biting her lip as she catches her breath. She can feel his chest heaving up and down as he also tries to get some air in his lungs.

 _"Awww!_ My leg!" She grimaces, rubbing her calf muscle. "I think I got cramp" She laughs. There's hardly room for the two of them laid in the back of his pickup and she untangles her legs from around his body, sitting herself up. Pulling her fingers through her tangled,sweaty hair, she sits over his legs, her fingers drawing circles on his stomach.

He lays there enjoying her touch, eyes closed. Catching a moment his hand stroking the top of her naked thigh.

"You know this takes me back" she laughs as she tries to find her panties from under the seat.

"What does? " He frowns

"Those sneaked moments in the back of your truck, though I don't remember it being as small as this" she chuckles again " It was good back then. Do you remember, when we did it in the base parking lot? I swore we were gonna get caught. That was before all this ... when it was just us, having fun"

Jason sits up looking at her, he pulls at her neck, then kisses her "This was fun, just now" he smiles

"Shut up!" she slaps her hand against his leg indicating for him to release her from his grip and then shuffles out of the back seat. Looking around the spot where they parked up.

She sorts out her dress and pulls it up to her waist "Can you zip me up?" she smiles. As she pulls he dress up to cover herself his hands are around her waist pushing it back down. He plants gently kisses along her spine "Jason you're supposed to be doing it up, not taking it off"

"Am I " he smiles his hands sliding around her stomach then up to the soft mounds of her breasts, kneading and caressing his thumb flicking at her nipples

"Jason stop!" she sighs "As fun as this is, we have to go!"

 _Mmmmm!_ he sniffs against her neck "Yeah, you're right, we do have to go" He helps to pull her dress up and pulls at the back zipper, fastening it .

Turning around she closes the rear door of the truck and leans her back against it. She locks her hands around his neck and looks him in the eyes, kissing him first before she lets go "Okay get it over with, give me the punchline"

"Punchline?" he looks at her confused

" _CJ this shouldn't have happened_... _We shouldn't' have done this_... blah! Blah!" she rolls her eyes

"No!" He shakes his head brushing her hair back from her face, his lips brushing against her mouth "No, I can' say that. Not his time. I wanted this. I wanted you. I shouldn't have... oh man I shouldn't have, but truthfully, I did"

"I don't get you sometimes" she sighs "You know there was a moment, in the restaurant, that it crossed my mind you might kill him, right there at the table. I can't believe how calm you were" she smiles "That wasn't like you at all"

"What you wanted me to kill him, when you could have done that yourself. You've got the skill set for it" He laughs

"Oh for sure I could do it. Be more fun watching you. Much more sexy" she laughs

"Oh much sexier, you like sexier me?" He smiles grinding his shorts clad groin against her

"Better than an angry one, yeah! " she laughs "But unfortunately ...he's the only one who knows where Clay is!"

"Yeah well trust me, I wanted to kill him and give me one opportunity and I will! Seeing you sat there with him, him saying he wanted you. I wanted to kill him" he shakes his head, he can feel a sudden shot of anger fill his body "believe me, if there hadn't been a room full of people things would have been much different. Even the thought of him, turns my stomach but then, like you said, he's the only one knows Clay's whereabouts"

She looks him in full in the face, she can feel his tension "So what's this then? You fucking me like this, you staking your territory, making a statement to Reuben. You have me he doesn't. Why are we here, doing this. When we both know we shouldn't "

"I don't know" he shrugs "Because I wanted to fuck you . It's definitely, not about him that's for sure. He's nothing." he looks at her as she frowns at him". Oh, I don't know CJ. What? What do you want me to say? It happened, you enjoyed it right. I got you of and don't say I didn't, cos I could tell" he smiles

"If it makes your ego feel better, yeah you did!" She smiles

"So, just stop analyzing everything. We had sex. It happens"

"I'm sorry" she puts her hand on his cheek stroking it "It's just its always like this now, always with regrets, that it shouldn't have happened. But it keeps happening doesn't it? Jason where did the fun go? We used to be fun, we used to live in the moment and enjoy it. When did it stop being fun?"

He puts both hands either side of head resting them on the roof of the pickup, he leans forward and kisses her with a firmness and passion as she smiles, reaching up to kiss him back. Then she lets out a long sigh and closes her eyes "So what now?"

"Now?" He shakes his head "I don't know" He sighs walking away, pulling his pants on "I know we're a disaster and this .. this is.. you're right it shouldn't have happened."

"Ah!...And there we have it!" she shakes her head "I knew it. This is my fault, right"

"No!" He shakes his head "No! No, I'm to blame as well. I told you. I wanted this, doesn't mean it should have happened though "

"You know Jason…." There's long pause of silence and she sighs " I think we should give him what he wants"

"What you mean the file ?"

"No. No I mean, swap me for Clay"

He shakes his head "No, no way. Clay wouldn't want that either. No way will he leave you there for him "

"He'll have no choice and soon he won't be able to make a decision. Look, I don't like it any more than you but... I'm really worried about Clay. Jason, Reuben he isn't a person to mess with. There's gonna be payback for the way you spoke to him" she sighs, he won't look at her "Jason! look at me" she waits until his eyes meet hers "he's dangerous and he likes to be in control. He won't take what you said lying down"

Jason nods "You know him so well? Yeah well he's not met me yet. God, I should have... _grrrr!_ in that restaurant you're right , I should have done something"

"And what good would that have done? I said, he's the only one who knows where Clay is, but Jason I'm serious about this. I've seen what he's capable of, he's got no morals. What he does, he does for fun, because he wants to. I'm really worried"

"Look we still have what he wants. They kill Clay and it's game over for him getting that file"

"I'm not worried about then killing Clay... I'm worried what they'll do to him before that point!"  
she moves and gets in the passenger seat, slamming the door shut.

As Jason gets into the drivers side and starts the engine she looks at him "And what the hell are we gonna do about Ray?" she sighs, closing her eyes "Oh god I can't believe that happened! I should have kept my mouth shut but I didn't know what she was talking about, Naima, I thought she knew!" she rubs her head _Fuck!_ " I would never have said anything, just you know what Ray's like, I just thought he'd come clean with her!" she shakes her head _Shit!_

"Look we'll deal with that when we have to. Let's just get back, before anyone notices we're missing"

"You know, I can't believe you're not mad about that, the Ray thing."

"Being honest... I nearly told her. When Clay came out with it in the bar ...I nearly went and told her, so I can't really preach"

"WOW! Really? Yeah well difference is you didn't"

"No... and the only reason I didn't was because of the kids! Oh, who knows, maybe in the long run it'll be for the best. He won't have to live with it eating him up now and bonus is she hates you, not me for telling her"

"Yeah!" She laughs "Thanks for that thought! Anyway, she doesn't hate me for this, she already hated me for everything else " she sighs. She's tired as she leans her head against the window "So now what?"

"Now, we go back to base. See what Davis has turned up on the intel"

"I thought you said Blackburn won't let me on there"

"Yeah well, I'll sort that. C'mon lets get back."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

As they enter the office Sonny's the first to spot them "What the hell is she doing here?" He frowns as he looks at Davis as they both watch them walk past the glass window "I thought Blackburn said she couldn't be here?" He stares more confused as they come into the office "Jace man, what's going on? What the hell's she doin here?"

"Don't start Sonny"

"I thought Blackburn said she was persona non grata."

"We need to go over some things"

"What things? You got some news on Clay? Jace, where have you been? I said what's going on."

"Look…" he pauses "we saw him and he's not getting what he wants. So, we work the problem from a different angle"

"You saw him? Who this Reuben guy? What'd he want?" Sonny frowns, he feels like he's not getting the whole story, Jason covering something "How the we gonna work a problem when we don't know where in the hell Clay is?"

"He wants that file and… and...and that's it!"

CJ looks at Jason and shakes her head

"What's going on?" Ray looks up, his face too has a look of confusion "Was the file all he wanted or not?"

"Yeah, there's always a _but_ or an _and_ to these things" Sonny's worried he doesn't want anything getting in the way of getting Clay back "So what is it?"

CJ sighs as she watches Jason ignore them both. "The _and_ … the and was me!" CJ answers

"You!?" Sonny laughs confused "What the fuck?! " he frowns "What he wants you for Clay?" he laughs "He obviously don't know you too well, Jeez!"

She ignores his comments "He wants at swap. Straight up, me and the file in exchange, for Clay" she looks at Sonny "I said I think we should do it, Jason doesn't agree"

"I told you we're _NOT_ doing that" Jason snaps back in an adamant tone "We find another way!"

"Hell, that's it? That's all he wants, her and that piece of plastic? So, what's the problem, just do it! Hell, I'll make the exchange for ya, if you got such a problem"

"I did offer!" she smiles

"And what? Dumb ass here, won't go for it, because it's you! Well fuck that! I say we do it, I just want Clay back. I don't care how"

"Well..."She sighs " at least you're consistent with your hate, Sonny... I'll give you that!"

He looks at her "I told you before... whatever it takes to get Clay back. I don't give a shit about you!"

Everyone in the room goes silent as Jason glares at Sonny. The all take a moment to think about the situation and what to do. Ray is the first to speak up "So, what if we do offer her up."

"See... now I like this man's thinking" Sonny smiles as Jason frowns at Ray's comment

"No...no just listen " he pauses he can see the hesitant look on Jason's face " We offer her up for the exchange and we get them both in the same place, same time. We won't get another opportunity like that" he looks at Jason eagerly awaiting his response

"I don't know Ray, there's a lot could go wrong here. I'm not sure it's a good idea. We could lose both of them"

"We just have to make sure we stay on top of it. Get a step ahead. We can do this."

"I don't know Ray, it's too risky. We can't take that chance. They get her they could just kill Clay anyway"

 _**Bleep*** Beep***_ The sound of text comes through on CJs phone. ***Video message: OPEN***

"That him?" Jason looks at her, she nods, taking a deep breath as she opens up the video file.

"Oh god... _shit!_ " she feels like she want's to vomit. It's another sickening video of Clay "Oh my god!" she puts her hand to her mouth "NO! What the hell have they done!" she can feel her stomach heave to her throat. She takes a deep breath, shaking her head in disbelief, big tears welling in her eyes _Oh no! Oh no! Please..._

Jason takes the cell phone from her hand "Oh god damn! You son of a bitch, piece of shit" he bangs his fist hard on the table "Dammit! Jesus Christ !" he rubs his head, the knotted pain in his chest _Ahhh! Fuck!_ "We have to do something!"

"I told you... I told you he wouldn't just accept it!" _Shit!_ She shakes her head as tears roll down her face "This is my fault"

Sonny's watching their reactions, he's worried now "Gimme the damn phone! Oh, what the hell!... That son of bitch!" Sonny stares at the screen lost for words "Jeezus Jason. We have to give him what he wants" Sonny's beside himself, he doubles in half, gripping his stomach in pain. Then he lashes out punching the metal filing cabinet, denting the front drawer "Jason, for god sake, offer her up! Christ... I'll hand her over myself!"

"Sonny… Sonny just calm down man. We'll sort this. We'll get Clay back, promise"

"Jason! " CJ pleads with him now "Please... Sonny's right, it's the right thing to do! He's not gonna hurt me like that. That's not what he wants"

"No! No, it's not happenin', he's not getting what he wants"

"Jason there's no choice now. Sonny tell him" CJ begs

"He gonna do that to her? I don't think so"

"I don't know. Sonny, are you forgetting what she's already been through, I can't put her through that again " he pauses thinking.

"I'll be fine! I will ...that's not what he wants" CJ sighs. Being honest, in the back of her head she's not sure what he really wants but if it's the only way to get Clay she has to try

Jason's still trying to think, trying to come up with a plan. Wondering if maybe he should just offer the exchange? He closes his eyes "Clay's tough he'll be okay"

"Hell he will, we need to get him out. Jason did you look at the same thing as me?" Sonny sighs frustrated he's in front of Jason. He's angry " For God sake man put your dick in your pants and do what needs to be done here!"

"Jason please, make the call, offer the exchange" She looks at him "Ray, Ray tell him! He'll listen to you!"

"Jace brother , you know they're right ...you've got no choice" he looks at him " he can't take much more of that, no matter how tough! We'll work it out, we'll get them both back"

 _Shit!_ Jason rubs his head thinking he looks at CJ. She nods, smiling, reassuring him.

"It's okay! Jason it's okay, it's not your fault. Just do it. Look, I'll make the call."

He closes his eyes and gulps her looks her back in the eyes "Alright ... alright make the offer!" he lets out a huge sigh, he doesn't like being cornered like this, feeling out of control _Jeez!... Fuck!_

CJ gulps she's shaking as she sends the text back. She looks at them all as a reply comes back straight back

 _Tomorrow. I'll send a location and time_

"It's done!" She lets out a nervous sigh _Shit!_

She sits down as the reality dawns on her. She rubs at her head, running her hands through her hair. She can feel her hands shaking.

"I need some air"Jason, bites his lip he looks at her and then walks away, slamming the office door behind him

Sonny and CJ stare at each other as Davis watches them. CJs breathing slowly, her hands still trembling with the nervous adrenaline pumping through her veins. She sits quietly at the table just thinking. It's then that she sees Jason's key, with the flash drive attached, on the table.

Looking around Sonny's now leaned over the desk with Davis, comforting him. Neither of them are taking any notice of her. Checking the rest of the room no one's there, Ray having gone to check on Jason.

She slides the key chain slowly towards her, keeping an eye on the door. Then in her lap she quietly slips the flash drive from the clip ring. She sighs as she wraps her hand tightly around it and places the keys back up on the table top "I um...I could do with a coffee anyone else want one?" Sonny looks back at her but doesn't answer "Suit yourself, I'll be back soon."

o-o-o-o-o-o

 _Pheww!_ With the flash drive now in her possession she takes a moment for some air. Leaning her head back against the wall of the corridor. The cool touch on her back is nice.

"Catherine?" she looks up as Captain Harrington calls her name from his office doorway

"Sir" she smiles

"I don't see you in ages, now twice in the same week! What are you doing here, again?"

"I was um.… some things, with Clay missing. They needed some intel on the guy who has him. I was actually just trying to find somewhere to make a private call." She closes her eyes, biting her lip smiling. "Just have to find a quiet space. You know anywhere I could go?"

"Use my office if you want? I'm just going to a meeting. So, you're welcome to use that?" he smiles

"Really? Oh that would be great. Is it okay if I use the computer as well? I just wanna check some email. Waiting on a bit of intel" she smiles again

"Yeah yeah sure... help yourself " He opens the door and shows her in "Just pull the door to when you leave" he smiles. He looks at her worried "You okay?"

"Yeah sure! Everything's fine"

"Okay well.. I'll head off. Leave you to it" he's still frowning not quite sure what's wrong with her

"Thanks" She sits in the chair, making sure to leave the door slightly ajar so she can keep check on the corridor, in case he comes back. She switches the laptop on and as the screen light up she plugs the flash drive into the side. Closing her eyes, sighing she clicks open the file labelled ' _Shopping list'_ Immediately a password box flashes up

PASSWORD VERIFICATION:

Apprehensively she sighs as she types in a string of characters from her memory. It accepts them and then moves on to the next screen

Encryption PASSWORD Enter: XXXXXXX / XXXXX /XXXX

She types again and a new dialogue box opens up and a file programme starts to run. _Shit!_ She sighs, tapping her nails on the desk as she waits for the process to run "Come on! Come on."

Hearing voices in the corridor she checks the doorway. It's nothing just a few passing people. Looking at her watch as the fifteen minutes pass so slowly. She smiles as the box closes and another access request looms on the screen

Encryption complete: Enter Administrator password: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

She swallows nervously and takes her hands off the keyboard. Pausing a moment to think. Rubbing her head, she's stressed as she keeps checking the corridor outside the office

ADMIN 2 PASSCODE: * * 2 X

She enters another code and the files start to process again and then she clicks _Select All / Copy_ Before she logs back on to the internet.

 _This is a protected server. Authorization is required. Enter name:_

She types her fathers name _: Lewis Roger Leonard Issac_

ENTER ID: X_X _ X _ _ ENTER PASSCODE: **************

The files start to run…. COPYING .. All Files….

She puts her head back against the wall. _Pheww!_ She rubs her head as she waits for it to process again.

COPYING FILES: 14mins left …

"Oh shit!... Come on!" She now checks the list of files and one in particular _'USS Hercules'_ She opens it up and browsing through the text on the file she highlights various parts and then presses _DELETE_

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Where's CJ ?" Jason's back in the room

"I don't know I think she went for a coffee" Davis looks around she been engrossed on the computer, checking on traffic cam footage and so hadn't taken much notice "It was a while ago though, just after you left" She frowns at her screen " Jason, I think I might have located one of the vehicles" she looks harder at the screen "It's going to a drive through burger bar."

"Good! Keep working on that and get me a location." he frowns for now he's more concerned where CJ might be _Shit!_ "Where the hell's she gone?"

"She's probably just in the bathroom. You want me to check?" Davis looks at Sonny

He shrugs "Who cares where the hell she is, she can't have gone far. "

"I don't know I don't like it when she disappears. It's never a good thing" Jason frowns "Let's find her...somethings off, here. I can feel it"

He picks up his cell phone and keys. As he's just about to put them in his pocket, he notices something missing on the keys. "The flash drive, where is it?" He quickly searches the desk and floor. Standing still where he is he frowns, thinking. _It's missing!_ "What the…Alright we need to find her and now!"


	44. Chapter 44

**Chapter 44: What are you doing?**

Waking from hazy semi-conscious sleep, Clay's laid on his side, it's the only way he can get any sort of comfort. His body's feels like it's on fire and he closes his eyes again, wishing for an end to his nightmare. He's wondering _When will the guys come and to get me out of this hell?_

Lifting his head, he tries so look over his shoulder but it's awkward. He reaches his hand around and feels gently across his back but there's too much pain to touch it properly. Looking at his fingers they are covered in blood from the knife cuts on his skin

 _Aahhhhh! Shit!_ He closes his eyes, trying to breathe through the pain. He then feels his ribs, they ache so much. The red raw bruising all over his body is beginning to change color to a yellow and black.

Moving slowly, he reaches forward for the bottle of water and he tries to bring it to his mouth. He just about gets a sip, but he spills most of it down his chest, his lip is swollen, and he can't get a good grip on the plastic bottle. Even that small effort to take a drink of water exhausts him and he closes his eyes to the overwhelming tiredness. Seconds later he awakes then when the door is thrust open.

"Oh no! No..no!" he screams out loud inside his head. He's trying to keep it all inside and not show any outward signs of weakness, but the pain in his face gives him away.

"Oh...Mr Spenser, I thought you would be more pleased to see me." Reagan smiles "I just came to tell you this might well be our last day together" he shakes his head "Shame, I had so much more planned for you but it would seem that last video has had the desired effect so there's going to be a trade" Now close up and looking Clay full in the face "Just think, this time tomorrow you'll be home in bed having sweet dreams and Ms Lewis will be lying here with me"

"What?" Clay frowns, his mind racing with panic _Is he trying to get in my head? Trying to mess with my emotions. Shut him out. Don't listen!_ Clay keeps is shutting him out.

"It would seem that Mr Hayes is keener to get you back, than keep her. I find that strange" he laughs "Whatever...he's accepted the trad. So, how do you feel about that, her for you?" he keeps laughing "How well do you think she's going to hold up here with me?"

 _He's messing with my head don't listen!_ Clay closes his eyes trying to block everything out, but he can't and finds himself screaming out "NO! Tell Jason no, not to do it!" Clay finds some strength from deep inside himself to answer back

"Sorry, but that's not my decision. Don't ask me why, but Reuben wants her here and not you...I just can't imagine why that is. Guess we'll find out. It's such a shame when we were just getting along" Reagan is toying with Clay, emotionally torturing him in his weakened state. "Get him up!" he dismissively sniffs "I thought we might have one last play date together before you leave. What do you say?"

He has this huge grin on his face as he once again moves the old wooden chair to the middle of the room. Clay takes a breath, trying to muster the strength to resist the coming punishments

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

C.J taps her fingers impatiently on the desk looking at the screen.

** 8 Minutes **

"Eight minutes, shit!" she check again at the corridor that she can through the gap in the open door _Oh Shit!_ She now sees Jason and Sonny standing there. Watching for a few minutes before they disappear from sight. _Phew!_ She swallows anxiously as she turns back to the computer screen watching the files still downloading. She frowns as she suddenly receives a text

* Bleep** Bleep** Tomorrow. The warehouse. Noon

"The warehouse? What the…" She's confused "Where? What warehouse?"

 _What warehouse?_ She replies

 _Use your head, Catherine. You've been there before._

She's pissed at his games and she's tired as she tries to think. _What, he means the one we were already at? The one where they left her._

 _"Why would he go back there?"_ She's confused, she closes her eyes to think _"Oh Clever! Who'd think to check a place you already know you cleared!"_

** 7 minutes**

Rubbing her head and turning around in the chair, she accidentally catches the pile of files sat on the corner of the desk, knocking them all on to the floor. "Oh shit!"

She gets down on the floor on her knees and starts to gather them up into a pile.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Where the hell has she gone?" Sonny's at a loss. They've checked bathrooms and the offices. The medical and everywhere they can think of. "You think she left the base?" he has to agree with Jason now "I have a bad feeling about this!"

"No! I checked with the gate; she's not signed out. She still gotta be here, somewhere" Jason rubs his head frustrated "You keep checking down that way and I'll go back to the canteen in case she is, _just_ getting coffee!"

"Wait!" Jason stops "Did you hear that?"

"No what?"

"Sounded like a phone" Then he hears the sounds of something crash to the floor "You keep checking that way."

Jason heads past Harrington's office but he notices the door ajar. He can hear rustling inside. He peaks inside the gap but can't see anything.

He apprehensively pushes the door open. At first he sees nothing, then he spots her long brown hair tied in a ponytail bobbing around from behind the desk. She's bent down, picking up the files that dropped. "What the hell are you doing?!"

"Jeez... Jason!" She looks up startled "Oh my God! You made me jump. I um…I'm just making a call"

"In here?" He frowns. "Harrington know you're here."

"Yeah…yeah. He said I could use the office, he's um…he's one of my father's old friends, just heard about what happened after all this time so I was calling him back to explain" she continues with her lies, but he doesn't believe her

"C.J I'm gonna ask you again. What are you doing in here?"

"Nothing! I told you, making a call"

"Where's the flash drive?"

She stands up, shaking her head, she shrugs. Her eyes glance up towards the computer screen.

** 5 minute ** ….. files uploading

"I don't know?" She swallows again she lies "I thought you had it?"

Jason can feel his anger building "CJ, why are you lying?" As he notices her quick glances towards the computer, he frowns, looking over at it himself, pulling it around to face him so he can see what she's looking at "What the _hell_ are you doing?"

He stares at her; her eyes flick back between him and the screen

** _4 minutes**_ That the time she has to buy for herself as the files to upload. "Nothing"

"That's enough!" Jason's loses control of his anger. He's so mad with her and her lies and maybe he overreacts, but he grabs his hand around her throat, shoving her back, hard against the office wall.

 _Urggghh!_ She squeals as she coughs, choking "Jason…. please…" she struggles trying to get a breath. Tugging at his hand, trying to make him release. She can't he's much too strong, even for her and slaps at him as she continues gasping "Please!…. Jason, you're….you're hurting me" she chokes in a panic "Jason!"

"Are you involved in all this mess? You something to do with Clay being taken?"

"No!" She shakes her head "No ... no I'm not I swear!"

He's up close against her face now, his hand still locked around her throat, his grip tight "I swear to god…" he tenses his jaw in anger "if you've got something to do with what's happened to Clay, I will kill you myself!" he looks at the computer screen as he takes a breath "Now, answer me! _WHAT THE HELL_ are you doing?"

She tries to swallow but his grip is tight, and he won't let go. Her face grimaces in pain "Please … you're hurting me!"

"TALK! Talk and I'll let you go."

"Insure... " she tries to loosen his fingers "...insurance!" she manages to force out "for you and Jaycee" she's struggling to talk and breath "Please… just listen to me!"

Finally, he loosens his grip "Alright…I'm listening, but this better be the truth this time or so help me god…" He still holds her pinned to the wall, inches from her face. He's staring at her, check for more of her lies.

"He'll come after you. Reuben he'll come for you and Jaycee. Even if he gets what he wants, just to prove a point. I needed to make sure you're protected"

He grinds his teeth "Keep talking"

She gulp. Her body a mix of heightened emotions "It's a backup, in case you need it, if... if I'm not here"

"I told ya. That's not in my plan. I'm not leaving you there"

"You can't keep me safe now, but I can try and protect you both" She looks at him. Her eyes filled with tears as he lets the grip around her neck loosen

 _Aahhhhh!_ She lets out a long sigh as she relaxes. Rubbing her neck, its sore and it hurts. And though she can't see, it's red from his grip with the mark of his hand.

"I swear to god" he makes a fist in front of her "you better not be lying to me or so help me, C.J I'll…." He's still not calmed down and grabs her cheek and pushes her head back against the wall. His nose is against hers almost touching her cheek "if you're lying to me"

"No!" She closes her eyes. "I wouldn't" She can't look at him, not while he's being like this, this angry. She shakes her head, well as much as she can, the way he's holding her still. "I'm not! I swear"

He turns and looks at the screen then back at her and finally he lets her go. Standing in front of the screen "What is this?" he looks back at her "Well? Tell me CJ " she sighs but doesn't answer "USS Hercules?!" he looks back at her "What's that? Why is that file open?" he frowns, looking at the highlighted text on the screen "You've opened that file, why?. Wait, you told me you couldn't open these files, but that was a lie? So, why's that highlighted? What are you doing...did you delete something?" he's frowns confused, so many questions "You said _his_ names involved. Are you protecting him?"

"No! …NO! Never!" she looks up, shaking her head. She can see him doubting her "Jason, no! Please believe me, I'm not!"

"So, what then?" he's still stares thinking "The Hercules, wait!" he frowns "Wasn't that the submarine, had a reactor accident that killed all the crew a few years back?"

She swallows nervously, then nods. "Yeah!

"So, why's the name of it on here?" he waits for an answer "C.J tell me!"

She closes her eyes for a moment while she thinks what to say. She swallows again, apprehensive how he'll react to what she tells him " ... because it wasn't, an accident"

He frowns, staring at her "What? But one hundred and thirty men lost their lives from what I recall. What're you saying, it wasn't an accident, then what the hell happened?" he waits and still she's slow to reply "Tell me, what do you know?" she just stares at him trying to think what to say "Damn it, C.J!" he bangs his fist hard,, the desk "ANSWER Me!"

She has a lump in her throat and tears roll down her cheek. She gulps and can hardly speak then taking a deep breath, ignoring his angry tone "Reuben, he…he um.…he sold the technical specs, for the sub. Included in which was its vulnerabilities and security protocols" she sniffs, wiping tears from her cheek "It wasn't an accident, because it was deliberate"

"Deliberate? You mean it was sabotage" He frowns "By who?"

She shrugs "Whoever bought specs I guess. I don't know who the buyer was. That's the truth" she bites her lip "But.. it was in Soviet waters. The whole thing got covered over. No one wanted to accuse anyone"

"So what, they said it was an accident to cover what really happened. Is that what you're saying?"

"Kinda .." she wipes her nose on her hand as tears run down her cheek "Jason do you know how many _accidents_ are saved on that file. Attached are the names of those who signed off on them"

He looks at her frowning. Concerned, uneasy and even slightly scared by what she's saying "How many?"

"Four hundred and thirty six!" she wipes her nose against her palm again and brushes her hair back from her face

"So, he involved in that and what, you're deleting his name? Covering up for what he did?"

"No! " she frowns "Why would you think that?"

"What then? What the hell did you delete?"

"You're right I was deleting something, covering someone, deleting someone's name" She sighs as she looks at the ceiling. Now, she can't look at him and as she takes a deep breath "My name."

"What the hell?" he frowns "Your name?"

"Yeah" She nods "Reuben, he got me to sign off some of the reports" she sighs SHIT! she takes another deep breath as she tries not to cry but it's hard, her emotions bubbling over as se desperately tries to hold them in. She can hardly speak " It says I logged the specs out and the accident report. Thing is there's nothing to show my log when they went back"

 _Pheww! "_ My father wasn't clean but once he saw my signature on those reports he realized Reuben was getting me involved and …"she closes her eyes, momentarily pausing for breath "he started to put the list together for our protection" she laughs "Ha! Protection .. funny. Look how that turned out!" she rubs her head.

The computer pings as the upload completes. **COMPLETED File Upload**

Jason looks at the screen "So, how far up does this go?"

"I don't know" she shrugs "Really I don't and I don't wanna know" she rubs her mouth and fiddles with her hair, she's stressed "I've seen bits of some of the files. There's a lot of influential names on there" she crouches down, against the wall, trying to catch her breath "Oh God! I'm so sorry but I just needed to make sure you and Jaycee had some protection. That's all!" She puts her hand to her mouth and leans her head back on the wall.

"Shit!" he starts pacing the office, trying to make sense of everything she's said. It's like a huge whirlwind swirling around in his head.. It's so big he can't understand it.

She slides herself up the wall until she's standing again. With her head leaned back she wipes the tears off her cheek as she watches him pace around the room, nervously.

Finally, he stops and stands watching her. He shakes his head. Then he release this long sigh  
"Come here" he pulls her forward, his hand on the back of her head and then wraps his arms around her. He holds her under his chin, she leans tight against his chest, her eyes closed  
"We hand that thing over tomorrow, get Clay back and then that's it, we have no more to do with it!"

She nods! She's so choked with emotion she can't speak and he lifts her chin with his hand, looking her in the eyes. The gently, his mouth against hers and he kisses her. She pulls away. "No! Jason, stop! Just stop it!" she shakes her head but keeping eye contact he kisses her again.

He can hear her breathing hard, fast and panicked, that's his fault "Sorry okay?" he examines her neck. Checking the red marks. The marks he made on it. She pulls away from his touch, it hurts. But he keeps gently touching, stroking where he hurt her. They're just watching each other. She puts her hand on his face and he leans her back against the wall, trying to kiss her "Jason _No_!" she turns her head "No, not here, someone could see"

" _Shhh!_ " he touches her face, still gently rubbing her neck "I'm sorry! I shouldn't have done that but I hate you lying to me." He sighs "Are you okay?"

she puts her hand to her neck where it hurts and nods. He keeps looking at the marks he made. As he touches them she closes her eyes. "Jas…."

" _Shhh!_ No more words" He wants to put everything right, make amends. Pressing his weight against her, he turns her around, sitting her on the edge of the desk. She breaths deeply  
"No Jason … I said not here" he leans in kissing her "No! Look we have enough problems without creating anymore by doing this"

His hands are around the back of her head and then she can't stop him. But the both freeze as they hear voices at the door. Harrington speaking to Blackburn in the corridor

" _SHIT!_ "

They both cough and straighten themselves up. She brushes her hair back and wipes her face with her hand. Logging out of the computer, she removes the flash drive. "Oh Shit!" She hurriedly gathers everything up

Jason holds his hand out "I'll take that, until tomorrow."

She frowns but nods then takes a deep breath as Harrington opens the office door.

"Master Chief Hayes?" he frowns "Lieutenant, something going on here?"

"No! No, nothing" she smiles and shakes her head wiping the last tear off her cheek

"There something here I should know about?" he frowns as he sees all the files on the floor, as does Blackburn who's standing behind him watching the pair of them suspiciously.

"No Sir. We were just checking intel on the Spenser situation. But we're were just leaving" Jason looks back at C.J

She looks at the floor "Yeah I need to go. I'm all finished here thanks!" she smiles at him again.

Blackburn looks at Jason as he passes him in the doorway "Something I should know about here Master Chief Hayes?"

"No! No, everything's good"

They all glance at each other as Jason and C.J leave. Harrington and Blackburn look at each other "I thought that was all over?" Harrington questions Blackburn

"It was!"

"Keep an eye on it Commander. I don't want anything getting out of hand again!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Master Chief! A word my office, now!" Blackburn stares at Jason from the command room doorway

"Yes sir"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Care to explain what that was in the Captain's office?"

"Nothing. Nothing to explain, Sir"

"You and her? I thought that was all over now"

"It is! Like I said it was nothing, we were just talking, about Spenser"

"Well it didn't look like it to me!" he frowns "Look Jason, we can't afford for something like that to be blowing up again. We have an operator missing, that she's connected to. I have cake eaters with eyes still fixed on us after Nigeria and a high-ranking diplomat killed on our watch. I can't have anything else going wrong just because you can't keep your pants on!"

Jason bites his tongue as he frowns angrily "I told you it's squared away. No problems"

"Make sure it is. And make sure she gets the message too" he stares at Jason " I think its best if she's gone from here for tonight."

"Sir I think she'd be better, where I can keep an eye on her"

"Gone! Do you understand me?"

"Yes Sir, whatever you say."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"What was that all about? You in trouble?" Sonny questions Jason as he walks back into the office

"No nothing" he's looking at C.J, he sighs "Look um… why don't you take my truck, go back to the house, get some rest before tomorrow."

"I'm fine. I'll just stay here. I'm happy to wait for you"

"No!" he snaps abruptly "No, I think you need to go!"

"Okay…" She frowns "..did Blackburn say something?" he doesn't answer, and she sighs "Alright. If _you_ think that's best. I guess I could do with a shower. Will you be coming back tonight?"

"Yeah!" He nods "I'll just wrap it up here first, I'll get Ray or Sonny to drop me off."

"Okay then" she looks around at everyone else, they're all staring at her. Sonny's not sure what's going on, but it concerns him because they both seem on edge. He holds the door open and again gives her a hard stare then he lowers his tone "There better not be any more screw-ups before tomorrow. You understand me?"

She nods

"I mean it. Nothing that puts Clay at risk" He sniffs "Jason might fall for your Mary Poppins routine but it don't fool me" He stares her in the eyes. He's cold and still full of hate "I told ya anything happens to Clay. I'll come for ya!"

She pulls her ponytail tight and looks away from his stare, as she sighs "You know, you need be careful Sonny. You could push it too far!" She sounds as if he doesn't bother her, but she also knows he means what he says.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Out in the air in the parking lot, she takes a deep breath away glad to be away from all the tension inside. Her hands are shaking from all the adrenaline and nerves.

She doesn't know where to start with her thinking, there's too much going on in her head. Sonny hates her so much and she's so mixed up about her feelings for Jason that she can't even begin to think about the Clay situation. She climbs into the driver seat and heads back to the house.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She enters the quiet of the house.

 _Hmmmm!_ She rubs at the tension in her shoulder. Running her hand gently on her neck as she checks her reflection in the mirror. She can still see where Jason had his hand around her throat the red bruising he left

Shit! She lets out a long exhausted, apprehensive sigh. Then she opens the brown paper bag, taking out the fresh unopened bottle of Jack Daniels she bought from the store on the way back. _Pheww!_ She takes another, deeper breath as she studies the bottle and its contents. Closing her eyes as she thinks. What the hell am I doing? She stares at the ceiling trying to not think about the bottle Shit! she rubs her head. "No, this is not happening. I have to stop this.

She walks through to the bathroom, standing the bottle on the counter by the basin. The she starts to get undressed.

Standing there in the warmth of the shower, the running water relaxing her tense body, she's just concentrating on her breathing. Taking long, slow, deep breaths.

You don't need it! You can do this without. She tells herself over and over as she concentrates her mind. Trying to focus on anything else except the unopened bottle of whiskey.

She lets the hot water trickle overhead, over her face. Then closing her eyes, she thinks about Clay, imaging him there, touching him. Worrying about what's going to happen tomorrow,

Shaking the tension from her neck she turns the water off before wrapping a clean dry towel around her body. She sits on the closed lid of the toilet pan. Staring directly as the bottle of alcohol, it's calling her name.

"No!" she rubs her head "No! No, you don't need it" _Oh god!_ She bites her lip, trying to quash that growing need, that longing desire to taste the liquid in her mouth.

She dries herself. The whole time, that bottle is willing her to touch it. Her fighting the demon, trying desperately not to. "NO! Oh god dammit!"

She's dressed. Just standing staring at herself in the mirror. She picks the bottle up again and turns it around in her hands. Then closing her eyes, she unscrews the lid and just stands eyes closed, sniffing the contents. Breathing in the tempting aroma.

Slowly opening her eyes again, she stares at her reflection. Then she watches as the person in the mirror bring the bottle to their lips, tipping it back and about to empty some of the contents into their mouth she cries out to them "Don't .. you don't need to do this!"

She can see them, hesitates and then stops. Putting the bottle down. She looks around at the door. She hears a sound _Jason!_

She listens again. Then she can hear more noises. She places the lid back on the bottle and opening the door just a few inches she looks out. Something doesn't feel right.

Very quietly she creeps into the hallway and from the doorway she can see some men, she doesn't recognize. They're walking around in the living room, pulling out drawers, searching the room.

 _Shit!_ Quietly she shuts herself back in the bathroom Holy crap! Shit! Nervously she pick sup her cell phone and calls Jason "Hey…there's someone's in the house!"

"Where are you?"

"The bathroom, I'm not sure they know I'm here"

"Okay, stay calm we're on our way"

She's vulnerable I need to get out of here. A panic rises inside her. She wonders who these men are, who sent them.

Again, she makes it to the doorway, it's all quiet and she sneaks a look out. They appear to be in the kitchen and main bedroom now. She looks at the front door wondering Can I make it. She has to take the chance and quickly steps across the living space.

Putting her hand on the front door lock _Pheww_! She sighs about to turn to turn it and let herself out. Just as she does Mmmm! She squeals as a large hand grabs around her mouth and pulls her back into the house.

 _Arrrrggghhhh!_ she lets out a stifled scream trying to fight whoever it is that has hold of her. Then she comes crashing down to the floor FUCK! And she hits her head on the corner of the table _"Awww_! Shit!" but she's still trying to fight "Let me go!" she kicks out

There's an almighty crack as she then feels a searing pain as someone smack their hand very hard across her cheek "SHUT THE FUCK UP!"

She breaths deep "Where is it?"

She shakes her head "What? I don't know?"

"The file where is it?"

"I don't have it!"

"But you do?"

"No! No, it's not here. I don't have it!" she frowns "Did Reuben send you?"

"You'll wish he did! Now I said SHUT up!"

She tries to make out who it is on top of her as they're searching her pockets. "I haven't got it I swear!" then as everything focus's she knows who it is that has hold of her "Reagan!" Oh shit! She panics "Please... I don't have it. Jason still has it, until the exchange, tomorrow, Reuben setup an exchange. Did he not tell you?"

She sees a glint of steel as he pulls out a blade "Please! Please, really I don't have it" She's stalling for time, hoping Jason can get here and save her.

"Ms Lewis _... Shhh!.. Shhh! Shhh!_ You need to quiet, yes. He's told me. You will be joining me tomorrow" he laughs "You know there were always two things Reuben had good taste in, wine and women." he smiles "Seems you're no exception. I can see why he likes you."

She shakes her head "Please... just let me go!"

"Oh, but I'm sorry. I can't do that. I have plans for you."

"He'll get the file, tomorrow. I told him, tomorrow, he set the time. Does he know you're here?" she swallows nervously. She's wondering if he's doing this under his own authorization "Please!"

"Where's the file?"

"I don't have it, seriously. I told you, Jason has it."

"You told Reuben you had it"

"Yeah but Jason took it back and that's the truth" she frowns, apprehensively as he lays the cold steel knife blade against the skin on her stomach near her old scar.

"Please...don't!" She's trying to remain calm, but the flashbacks she's having are making it hard. She breaths, short and deep breaths as he leans against her, close up against her face "You know I told Mr Spenser that I was going find out for myself, what the attraction with you as"

She shakes her head staring him in the eyes she's kicking and trying to pull away but he's just too strong, even for her. "Go to hell!"

"Feisty…I like it." he smiles _Mmmm!_ he sniffs at her neck. "I'm gonna enjoy this" He starts to drag her towards the bedroom.

"Don't!" she closes her eyes "Get off me!" She pushes with all her force, kicking out against him once again she falls to the floor. She tries to get away but he's too heavy, pinning her down. She scratches at his face

Ahhh! "Bitch!" he slaps her hard again. Pulling at her tee shirt where she lays on the floor of the living area

Urggghh! she takes a deep breath. Crying out as he draws the sharp edge of the knife across the previous scar on her skin. It's a very gentle movement done with expert skill. Not hard, or deep but just enough to just break the skin surface and draw blood. She sucks in a deep breath _Aarrrghh!_ She cries. It might not be deep, but it stings like hell.

"I'll ask you again. Where is the file?"

"I …told… you" she sucks back her tears " ..I don't.. have it!" she breaths deep to counter the burning sensation as she looks up she can see the bright white lights of a vehicle arriving "Jason!" she gasps.

 _Shit!_ "We have company. Looks like Hayes is back!" his man at the window turns around.

"Get up! We need to get out of here!"

The four members of Bravo, unload from the van. Their weapons now trained on the house; Ray has Reagan in his sights at the door. He has hold of CJ by the hair and pushes her out in front, to protect himself. He has arm round her neck and as they get to the path they can see Bravo standing there.

"Uhh…uh! I don't think so Mr Hayes, do you?" he holds the knife to throat

"Let her go! You're getting what you want, tomorrow. Why are you doing this?"

"Who knows?" he shrugs "I just do what I'm paid"

C.J has her hand on her stomach the blood seeping through her fingers as she moves.

"CJ, you okay?"

She nods to acknowledge him. Her pain is bearable, for now. Reagan walks backwards, his arm still around her throats as they make it to their waiting vehicle.

Sonny and Ray concentrate their weapons on them "You want us to take 'em out boss?" Sonny's so cool and calm just chewing his gum waiting for the order to go hot, from Jason "I want this son of a bitch"

"You want to see Mr Spenser again?" Reagan calls across the driveway "Then that's not going to be a good idea Mr Hayes"

"Cool it Sonny" Jason grinds his teeth; he wants to do what Sonny wants but he knows Spenser and C.J depend on his decision he makes "Stand down!"

"Just so you know" Sonny sneers as he shouts at Reagan "I'm taking you out first, tomorrow. Same as I did your Brother"

Reagan frowns, glaring at Sonny across the driveway "Oh, you be sure do that because I'll be waiting!"

Jason follows them as they walk. He's just staring at Reagan, holding his gaze. He walks as they walk, step in step. Reagan doesn't take his eyes off Jason. He holds C.J tight against him using her as a shield, at knife point

"Just know this..." Jason warns him "I'm comin' for you tomorrow!"

"Like I told your man, I look forward to it!" He laughs as they climb into the back of the truck. Their driver has been sitting waiting, engine running ready to go. He grabs CJs hair and pulls her inside, before they slam the side door shut and speed off.

 _FUCCKKK!_ Jason cries out

"God dammit…Christ!" Sonny's fuming "I'm having that son bitch"

BRAVO team hurriedly load back into the blacked-out van, which they arrived in. Sonny puts it in drive and hurriedly they give chase. Then they see the truck they're following, slows, not stopping. And they dump something out of the side, into the road before it speeding off again.

Seeing the heap of clothing in the middle of the road. Jason cries out " _Sonny! STOP ! Stop!,_ It's C.J!" They pull to a halt next to her. _Shit!_ he bangs the dashboard hard with his fist "Sonny, get on to Davis. See if she can pick them up on traffic cams. We need to find them"

.


	45. Chapter 45

**Chapter 45: I need to see you.**

Jason stands in the road watching the truck as it disappears over the intersection. _Shit!_ He looks to Ray and Trent as they tend to C.J where she lays in the road. "She okay?"

"Yeah...yeah. She's good! CJ, did you hit your head?" he looks at the large lump on her forehead

"Oh yeah, on the table earlier. It's fine!" _Awww!_ _Shit!_ "My arm hurts though"

"She good?" Jason frowns as he stands hovering over them while both him and Sonny keep watch "What's with all the blood?"

"Let me look" Trent lifts her shirt and looks at the slash across her stomach

 _Aahhhhh!_ She grimaces in pain as he pulls the fabric away from it.

Noticing they're now getting attention from bystanders in the street, some getting their cell phones out to take pictures. Jason decides they need to move "We need to get her up, off the street. We're drawing attention from the YouTube brigade"

Trent and Ray agree and placing their arms under her, they lift "Okay ready?... UP!"

 _Ahhh! Shit!.._."Oh my god! That hurts!" she cries as they carry her back to their waiting vehicle, sitting her on the edge of the open door so that Trent can examine her.

"I don't think it's broken, maybe a fracture. Can you make a fist?"

She can just about manage " _Ahhhh_! It hurts but yeah" her skin is sore. The graze from the road burn covers the full length of her arm.

"We may need an X-ray just to be sure?"

"No! No,I don't need an X-ray. I told you I'm fine. It'll be fine."

Jason's nervous and he paces around "If she's ready to go, let's just get out of here, then we'll worry about what needs to done."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Arriving back at the house. They're shocked by the mess. Drawers open the contents strewn all over.

"Oh Jeez!" CJ looks around as Ray and Sonny make a start or the clearing up. Seeing the mess, she's in shock at what happened and as the full enormity hits her, she starts to shake.

"You okay?" Jason frowns, as he checks with her. She nods but doesn't speak, just sitting herself down on the corner of the couch, taking deep breaths as she holds her hand against her ribs. Her shoulder and arm are really hurting now, her hip is stiff and her head aches. Then feeling a soreness at the top of her leg she slides her pants, partially, down. There's a huge graze and bruising that matches that on her arm. _Shit!_ She groans _.  
_

Pulling her pants up as Trent, again, fusses around her. He's more concerned with the cut on stomach for now than the hurt in her arm. Laying down on the couch she allows him to remove the temporary dressing that he'd put on earlier, then he begins the slow, gentle task of cleaning it up.

"How is it? " Jason's leans over to look

"To be honest, it looks worse than it is. Whoever did this they're an expert with a blade, knowing exactly how much pressure to use. Just enough to break the skin but not do any serious damage. It's clean, that's a good thing."

"It just sore" she sighs "I'll be fine"

"Hey, you keep still. We need to get you checked out, just to be sure" Jason kisses the top of her head

"No! Look, I'll be fine. I'm sure Trent can sort it"

"Well, I think it might need couple or stitches. I don't have the equipment here to do that. We need a hospital"

"I'll call Blackburn, use the one on the base. We can't risk too many questions from an ER department"

As he watches her griping her arm, Trent frowns "That arm's concerning me. We need make sure it's not fractured"

Trying to ignore both of them, she sits up "I need to clean up" she sighs as she looks at the blood covered shirt she's wearing. "Can you give me a hand?"

"Yeah sure" Jason nods.

As they head into the bathroom, it causes concern with the rest of the guys. Ray and Sonny exchange anxious glances. Sonny, furiously annoyed "She's damn suckered him right in again, aint she?"

"It's cool." Ray reassures him "Sonny, don't worry we'll keep an eye on it."

"I'm not worried about him; he can fuck her as much as he likes I just don't want it affecting our chances of getting Clay back. Her distracting him before the exchange tomorrow. You know he already said earlier about calling off the plan. Us going in without her. This situation right now, it's not gonna help. This gives me a bad feelin Ray"

"Sonny you always have a bad feeling, about everything. C'mon it's going to be okay. It will all work out. Clay will be back here with us tomorrow"

"Yeah well he better be, for her sake!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

In the bathroom Jason smiles as helps her out of the blood-stained shirt. Pulling it up over her head

 _Awww! Oooo! S_ he grimaces with pain as the material pulls over the graze on her arm.

"You okay?" He strokes her face gently

"Yeah! It just hurts" Her body is shaking, and she starts to cry, before taking a breath, wiping the tears from her cheek "Oh god when did I get so pathetic."

"Hey, c'mon you've been through a lot. You're strong, you'll get through this"

She undoes her pants and slides them off. It's then Jason can see the bruising and graze on her hip, and she sits herself on the lid of the toilet pan to look at it. She's wearing only her bra and knickers and Jason starts to clean her up with a wet warm cloth.

 _Owww!_ She grimaces "Oh hell, that stings!" she laughs

"We'll we gotta clean you up; I figure better this way than a shower."

"Yeah, think you're right"

As he rinses the cloth out, she puts her head in her hands, lost in her thoughts "So, you got any idea what this was about?"

"No, no idea."

"No theories as to why they came tonight. I mean as far as they know they're getting what they want tomorrow, so this makes no sense"

"I don't know " She shakes her head "Could be Reuben trying to determine the outcome in his favor, catch us off guard or even him just playing games, trying to put us on edge before the exchange. I really don't know" she sighs "I gave up trying to work him out years ago" _Ahhh! Shit!_ She squeals as the wet cloth touches her arm.

"Sorry!"

"Oh god! Jason, I'm so done with this" she sighs, desperately trying to hold back her tears "I just want things to be normal" She stands up and looks in the mirror assessing herself. Looking at her arm and stomach "I don't want this life anymore" she shakes her head still looking at her reflection "I'm so tired. I want that thing gone. You know, I wish it' had never come into my life."

"Hey c'mon, it's gonna be okay. We can get through this" He wraps his arms around her, from behind, while he watches her in the mirror. He runs his had gently down her curves and settles his hands, gently, on her stomach, being careful to not touch the wound.

She leans into him, sighing as she enjoys the secure feeling of his strong arms around her. Watching their reflection and as he holds her she places her hands-on top of his, gently caressing them. He rests his chin against her shoulder, smiling. He can see in the mirror her closing her eyes as she enjoys this quiet moment.

"Hey, you know after tomorrow, you can have normal" he turns her around, gently kissing his lips against hers "We could have normal, together. If that's what you wanted?"

"You serious?" She frowns

"Yeah..." He nods " I guess. I mean I'm willing to try if you are" he places his hand against her cheek and looks her deep in the eyes as she hesitantly smiles

"Me and you, normal?" she laughs "I don't think we know how, do we?"

"Well maybe not, but we could try. You, me...the kids. Why not?"

"You're serious?" He's only ever once talked like this, about being a normal couple. Normal is not how their relationship works. They fight, then they fuck that's the way its always been

"Yeah I think I am." he lifts her face looking longingly into her eyes as he kisses her.

"Um..." She sighs nervously as she looks at him "if you're serious then...Jason I need to talk to you about something" she closes her eyes taking a deep breath "I um...I think.." She's cut off before she's she able to finish.  
There's a knock on the door and Ray puts his head around; he frowns looking at them standing there. Her in her underwear, him his arms wrapped around her "Oh , look sorry, but Jason there's a call. Blackburn, he needs to speak with you" Ray hands him the cell phone

"Sorry. Look CJ, we'll talk, later. I gotta take this"

"Yeah! Yeah it doesn't matter, it's not important it'll keep" She smiles "I'll get cleaned up, then I'll be there" She closes her eyes, taking a relieved breath listening to him on the phone. He's trying to get permission to take her to the medical unit, at the base, while also explaining what's gone on tonight.

As she turns around to get a towel from the shelf, she notices the whiskey bottle the one she bought earlier _.  
Pheww!_ She lets out a long sigh as she stares at it. Watching for movement at the door as she opens the lid and takes on large swig out of the bottle. As she finishes she then hides it back in the cabinet below the sink. _Shit!_

It feels good and quickly steadies her anxiety, making her feel so much calmer. She thinks about taking one more sip but just as she's about to reach for it Jason opens the door. The thought quickly vanishes from her head as he speaks.

"Okay, we gonna pack up, go back to base. You need to get dressed."

"Yeah! Yeah, just give me a minute"

"Trent's gonna get you looked at when we get there but I'll send them on ahead, in the van, then I'll drive you back. He's worried about your arm and wants to get it checked out"

"Okay, yeah sure thing. Like I said, give me a minute and I'll be right there"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She's in the bedroom, searching a bag in the closet that contains some of her clothes so she can get dressed.

Jason's standing in the doorway "They've all gone now" he smiles "You alright?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Jason... " she takes a breath "..just hold me"

He frowns for moment then does as she asks, wrapping his arms tightly around her, holding her close to his chest. Resting his chin against her head, he comforts her. She looks up and puts her hand around the back of his head, staring him in the eyes she can't resist and again she kisses him. " _Hmmmm!"_ she sighs smiling

"Hey, c'mon we don't have time for this, you need to get dressed. We need to get out of here. There'll be time, when we've got Clay back"

"Jason, you know I heard Sonny earlier, saying you're changing the plan, you're not sending me for the exchange. Are you sure that's a good idea. I mean the plan was set for tomorrow why take a risk it now?"

"He's right, there's gonna be no exchange. I'm not putting you in more danger. I'll find a solution some other way. All you have to do is get me a meet with him"

"Jason please, you need to stop and think about this"

"Yeah I am thinking... thinking what's best for _you!_ "

"You need to think about Clay. He needs to come first. I'm gonna be fine"

He kisses her again, his hands follow a line down her back, over her hips and now its him that's interested in something more "Jason _no_ , stop! You're right, I need to get dressed"

"Okay!" He stops, looking at her, he sighs "Doesn't mean I don't want to ... you know" _Mmmm!_ He groans as he nuzzles into her neck

"Just _STOP!_..." she sighs picking up her clothes. Looking him in the face, she smiles with some regret at having to say no to him. "Later.. maybe!"

She smiles again as she pulls her pants on and he helps her with the clean shirt, pulling it over her head and arm. "I just need a quick bathroom stop, before we go" she smiles and kisses him "Jason... tell me it's gonna be okay"

"It will ... trust me"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sighing loudly, she looks at herself in the bathroom mirror. Washing her face again trying to clear her thoughts, trying to think about what happened and why Reagan came for her. She rubs her head _It doesn't make sense even for you Reuben that was an odd thing to do._

As she glances at the cabinet she thinks about the bottle inside and without much further through she takes it out , opening the lid she takes a long glug of the warm liquid. Savoring the taste. It's nice, then as she hears Jason call her she quickly puts it away. "Coming!" She wipes her mouth and then very quickly brushes her teeth.

"What're you doing in there?"

"Nothing I'm fine...I'm ready" She smiles.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay wakes. He's dazed and aching. He can barely move, laid on his chest on the floor. He's lost all sense of time; night or day and he has no idea how long he's been laid there.

He's cold but can't move, can't get up. They haven't even chained him now, so weak that he's unlikely to be able to stand, let alone get away. He feels in his body, in his mind that he won't last. One more beating and he won't survive.

His body is covered in blood. He's dirty, hardly recognizable, except for his filthy blonde curls. He lifts his chin just enough to see someone enter the room. He groans quietly but in his head his voice is screaming, though even if he wanted to though, he wouldn't, physically, have the energy to do it for real.

His head swims with pleasant memories of better days, but the every now then... _Wham!_ He has a flashback to a beating. He feels the panic in his chest and he can't breathe. This out of control feeling comes over him and it takes all his mental will to shut it out. As he hears _the voice_ he just wants to give in. He shuts his eyes wondering if he should stop fighting and just let death take him but it's something he can't do, something inside just wants to keep fighting.

"Food!" _the voice_ informs him.

He doesn't recognize it, it's American. The guy chucks the burger bag and bottle of water on the floor, laughing "I'm not sure you want it but.." he tips his head looking at Clay lying there, he frowns then he calls to the other guy sat outside "Hey, you think he's dead?"

Another voice, another American, is at the doorway and they both stare as he lays there not moving. Clay wonders where Reagan is, he's always been the only one to speak to him before.

The voice bends down in front of him and studies his face. He can hardly tell if he's breathing, let alone alive. Then Clay opens his eyes, trying to get a focus on the face of his captor, it's blurred, and he can't make out the features.

"Oh, it's fine ... he's still okay! Not sure he'll last much longer, though. Reagan was pretty rough on him this last time!"

"Ah well, probably best, if he goes soon. Think the plan is to kill him anyway"

"Think we should tie him back up?"

"Nah, don't worry he's going nowhere. We gotta move him in a while when we get the call. Perhaps he'll be dead before then. Why is it always us has to do the heavy lifting" he laughs "Leave the door ajar, we'll keep an eye"

Clay closes his eyes and sighs _Come on guys where are you? I need you now!_

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Trent you do what you needs to be done with her." Jason gestures toward CJ "Davis we got anything from these traffic cams yet?"

"Yeah but um... unfortunately they abandoned the vehicle here" she points at the street map on her laptop "left on foot. I'm still searching CCTV to try, pick them up but it's a bit of a needle in a haystack"

 _Shit!_ " So, we don't actually know where they're holding Clay? I was hoping we'd get that info by now. Do we know if they moved him back to the warehouse yet?"

"No! We've been monitoring but there's been no movement yet." she sighs "We didn't monitor it anymore after you cleared it the first time so there is a chance they already brought him back. Strangely all the cameras in the area are offline."

 _Shit! Dammit!_ He runs his hands through his hair "He knew what he was doing, using that place again. Puts us on the back foot"

"Jace, only thing we can do, is sit tight and go with the exchange like we planned, for tomorrow" Ray looks at Sonny

"I told you, we're not doing that now!"

"Jason Brother, please think. This is all set up, we had a plan in place. To change it now is..."

"So why the hell don't ya wanna go with this plan now Jay?" C.J looks up, she can feel Sonny glaring at her as he speaks. She can tell he's furious with Jason.

"I just don't. It's too much risk. These guys have proved how unpredictable they are. And until we know what's going on. I'm not putting us at risk!"

" _Us_ at risk or do you actually mean _her_ at risk. Which is it Jason?"

"I need to know why they came here tonight. Somethings off with this. I can feel it"

"Without this exchange they not gonna offer Clay back" Sonny shakes his head still staring at CJ. He knows the real reason Jason's faltering, is because of her.

"We'll work around it. We're gonna get him back. I just need some time to think ...Davis we _NEED_ that location ASAP!"

"Working on it!"

"Jason, not going through with the plan, that's one hell of a risk... I mean all we have to do is give her the disk and walk her in and they give her Clay back like agreed. Why risk changing that now?"

"Sonny you questioning my decision?"

Sonny thinks carefully before he answers "Yeah...yeah I think I am. You know why? Cos I don't' think you're thinking with your head!"

She sits and looks at Sonny. She knows exactly what he's thinking. He's blaming her, that it's her fault Jason's changing the plan. Trent can feel the tension filling the room. There's an argument brewing "Hey... c'mon, I'll take you, get your arm sorted"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They get to the medical unit on the other side of the base. Sitting to wait outside the assessment bay they've been assigned "I'll be with you shortly" the Doctor smiles as he strolls past. Trent nods, they recognize each other.

The receptionist gives C.J a consent form and paperwork to fill in. Now she's classed as a civilian she's not covered by the same policies as when she was military personnel and therefore there's some rules they have to conform to.

"Red tape, gotta love it!" she sighs. Her arm is hurting again, and she struggles with the pen as she starts to fill it in. Halfway down the endless check boxes, there's a section she hesitates over. She stops writing, just staring at the questions on the form. "Hey you know, I could do with a coffee how about you?" she smiles at Trent

He nods "But they'll probably call you in a minute. You wanna wait till we finish up?"

"No! Look, why don't you go and get it now, just in case we have to wait longer. Hey...don't worry, I'm big girl. I can go in by myself" she smiles

"Alright! I'll go. You're right and I could do with one too. It's been a long night. "

She looks at the bottom of the form. _Consent I do / I don't consent to x-rays._ The small box beside it to check. She looks up, takes a deep breath, checking around the corridor and then marks the _Don't consent_ option. She rubs her head and lets out a long sigh, staring at the mark on the form. She puts her hand to her mouth thinking about what she's done. Debating her decision.

Trent has literally just headed out the double doors, at the bottom of the corridor, when the Doctor calls her in "Ms Lewis. Let's have a look at you"

She smiles and taking the form with her enters the assessment bay.

First, he looks at the wound on her stomach. He frowns wondering if he remembers her from before, when she was brought back in a much worse condition. He checks Trent's notes, getting himself up to speed on what's happened to her

"Okay... well it's a clean wound. Definitely must have been a sharp blade so luckily the wound edges are straight, I can glue it rather than stitch"

"Well..."She laughs "that's something good...I suppose?!"

He smiles. "Just lay back, this shouldn't really hurt. Maybe just a little, the skin around the wound is quite tender"

"It's fine. Do what you have to do. I'm pretty robust " she laughs as he starts to use the surgical glue on the wound. Holding it with sterile strips to keep it closed

"Just leave the dressing on for tonight then you should be able to remove it tomorrow. Though try not to do too much, things like exercise that type of thing. Things that might pull at it."

"How long before it will be okay?"

"Week should see it start to heal over for basic tasks and very light exercise" he moves around to the other side "Right let's take a look at this arm now" He moves it around, trying to bend it

 _"Awww! Shit!_ That hurt!"

"Okay...I'm guessing, from what I can feel it's just badly bruised but um...we'll get an  
x-ray, just to be on safe side. Precautionary really."

"Can we leave the x-ray. I don't need it"

"No, no I'd rather we just get one done, then I'll know for sure there's nothing fractured or broken" he looks at the form she handed him when she arrived. Going through it adding the answers to the form to the one on his computer. "Um..." he looks across the desk at her, puzzled "I...I see you've marked _no consent_. Is that a mistake?"

"No. I ..." she swallows nervously "I just need to get back, not sit around waiting for an X-ray that I don't need"

He frowns then he looks at the rest of the form noticing she didn't answer all of the questions "Look, is there something I should know? Something else you wanted to tell me?"

"No!" She shakes her head "I told you I just need to go. Look, can you just get this patched up and stop with the questions. Let me get out of here. I'm tired"

"Okay!" He sighs, puzzled at why she's being aggressive and uncooperative "I'll just dress it"

o-o-o-o-o-o

"Hey!" Trent smiles as he exits the assessment bay. He's been sat waiting in the corridor "Sorry coffee's cold. I was gonna come in. How'd it go, anything broken?"

"No, they err ...didn't bother with an x-ray He thought everything was fine. Look I need the ladies room excuse me a minute"

"Yeah sure" he frowns watching her, she seems even more on edge now. He sits himself back in the chair, rubbing the tiredness from his face, while he waits.

The doctor comes out "Trent, how are you? Long-time no see. You with Ms Lewis?"

"Marcus! I'm good. Um.. yeah I'm with CJ. So, um... it wasn't broken. I thought after my assessment on scene she might need an x ray. She had a lot of pain before."

"Well I offered, but...well she refused, so.. it's up to her I guess. Keep an eye on it. Come back if there's any swelling or more pain." He frowns as his pager bleeps "Sorry I have to go. Trent, we'll catch up soon"

"Yeah sure" Trent frowns, now he's concerned as CJ comes back from the bathroom "You okay? Ready to go"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Trent drives as they head back across the base to the command room "So, you gonna tell me why you refused the x ray?"

"What?!" She's lost deep in her own thoughts, staring out the window "Oh that. Um... no reason. It was no big deal. He said I didn't need it. I just didn't wanna waste time sitting around waiting for that, when we've got bigger things to be doing. Like getting Clay back."

He brings the truck to a halt in the middle of the open space, turning the engine off "Look, if you're gonna expect me to lie to Jason then you better start being honest with me"

"What ?" she swallows anxiously " I never asked you to lie to Jason" she frowns

"He's gonna ask about the x-ray, and you gonna want me to say you didn't need one, right?"

"Maybe ... just to keep him off my back. It's not a lie as such. I told you waste of time"

"Okay, so not a lie. Then I'll just tell him you refused. See how quickly he sends you back for one shall we."

"Jeez Trent " She shakes her head laughing nervously "Why's it such a big deal?" She closes her eyes thinking what to say as he stares at her "Look what does it really matter ...I'm fine, I told you that!"

" CJ I know you well enough by now I can tell when you're covering something. So, what's going on?"

She rubs her head trying to avoid looking at him turning her head she stares out of the window "Nothing! Seriously!" She smiles "Oh c'mon Trent, what's the problem"

Her defensive attitude now makes him even more sure something is going on. He sits there looking at her and doesn't' move "I can wait here all night for you to answer"

"Oh jeez!" She takes a deep breath. She looks at him, but he doesn't move or change his expression "Seriously?" she shrugs "Oh why the big deal?"

"I don't know you tell me. That's what I wanna know"

Shaking her head, she closes her eyes taking a deep breath. She re-opens them, then looks at him "Look..." she bites her lip "it's probably nothing, just stress but..." she sighs again "Oh Jesus, how awkward is this, look I'm .. " she closes her eyes again. Shit ".. I'm a couple weeks late. So, I figured with it only being precautionary it was best not to have the x-ray. Satisfied now?!" She turns staring out the side window, not able to look him in the face

"Wait..." He frowns trying to understand what she's saying "...late? What do you mean _late?_ Oh! Oh my god, _late!_ What you think..."

"No! No, like I said its probably nothing. Just stress. You know with everything that's been going on" She turns and looks at him "Oh! don't look at me like that" she sighs "Yes, I know. I'm stupid, you think I don't know that" she rubs her head "Everything got messed up, things got out of hand a couple of times and we just weren't as careful as we should've been."

She closes her eyes running her hand through her hair. She feels embarrassed having to tell him this. Trent has such a look of disappointment in his face.

"Yes I know I'm idiot. Don't you think I've not told myself that." she shakes her head _Shit!_ She lets out another tired sigh, biting her lip anxiously "God! I really need this like a hole in the head"

"You need to tell Jason"

"NO! No way Trent!" she snaps at him bluntly. "NO! And you don't say a word. I will tell Jason _if_ I need to. We just need to concentrate on getting Clay back, not give him another reason to pull the plug on tomorrow. Trent, you keep your mouth shut, do you understand?!"

"CJ you can't withhold this from him, he'll want to know the risk you're taking. You're pregnant you can't do this."

"Yes...yes, I can. It's my problem. I'll deal with it _if_ I need to" _Shit!_ "I should have never said anything to you" She's worried now, knowing she shouldn't have told him. Truth was she wanted, needed, to share her worries with someone. Trent was as good as it got really.

"I swear, you breathe a word and I'll report you to a disciplinary. You know you can't divulge medical information like that" she angrily stares at him "I mean it Trent. I won't hesitate to report you. I'll take it all the way" She sighs "Anyway, like I said it's probably nothing, just stress."

"Oh my god CJ, you are putting me in an awkward position now. Jason's gonna go mad when he finds out "

"Yeah well I'm sorry, but I need you to keep this a secret. He might not need to find out, not if I don't go ahead with this."

"Fine!" He shakes his head. He will stay quiet because he knows he must, but doesn't mean he likes it

"Look let's just get back we're wasting time sat here."

o-o-o-o-o-o-

They walk through the office doors to find Sonny and Jason are arguing

"You don't wanna stick to the plan now...why?"

"Cos after what happened tonight I'm not risking an exchange. We have to work it another way"

CJ looks between them "What the hell's going on?"

"Oh! Jason here ... he now wants to mess up the perfectly good plan to get Clay back tomorrow"

"Why?" Jason doesn't answer her "Jason just stick to the plan like Sonny says"

"Oh, thank you! Finally, we agree on somethin'"

"Jason just think about what's best for Clay here. You don't even know exactly where he is at this point, so you storm that place and he's not there, then they'll probably kill him. You wanna take that risk, really?"

Jason's pacing, stressed, tired. He can't think "I can't put you at risk. Not after tonight"

"Brother listen we'll keep her safe" Ray tries to calm the situation "I know you're worried. But Sonny's right let's just stick to the plan"

"I need a coffee" Jason sighs as he walks off, slamming the office door shut.

"Jeez!" Sonny stands in front of CJ staring at her. "This is your fault, you been screwing with his head"

" _ME?_ You can't blame me for this. You just heard me say he needs to stick to the plan. I wanna get Clay back as much as you do"

"Well I am blaming you"

"Jeez Sonny" she shakes her head as he too walks off, the door rattling again in its frame She lets out a big sigh "Unbelievable!"

Ray looks at her "Let's take a break, get some coffee takes a rest. Been a long night."

"Yeah" she nods rubbing her head. He's right, she is tired. "Shit!"

o-o-o-o-o-o

She finds herself sitting in the office on her own, everyone else has taken a break when Jason appears in the office. He's carrying two cups of coffee.

"Hey, thanks" she smiles as she looks up at him. He places the coffee in front of her

"You okay?"

"Yeah you?"

He nods. "How did you get on, with your arm?"

"Yeah it's fine! Everything was fine. They patched me up, so good to go"

"Nothing broken?"

"No!" she shakes her head "All good" she sighs. "I'm just tired! Jason um... look I know you don't wanna hear it but really you need to just stick with the plan for tomorrow"

"Can't do that! Look um... I gotta think, so why don't you go in there .." he points to the side office, get some rest"

"I'm fine"

"No, you're not fine, I can see how tired you are"

"Yeah and so is everyone else." she wraps her arms around his waist and holds him leaning her head on his chest "Jason please...just stick to the plan, offer the exchange" she looks up at him "Where is the file now?"

"Here..." he taps at his back pocket "Safe."

She smiles as she puts her hand onto his pocket she slides her hand in, to feel it. "Good, keep it safe" then as he places his hand around her butt, moving around her curves, she leans in and kisses him.

" _Mmmm!"_ She sighs as he kisses, him while she strokes her hand over his back "Okay perhaps you're right, I'll get some rest for a bit. You know I wish we were back at the house"

"Yeah me too!" he smiles as he leans in to steal another kiss

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She goes to the quiet of the office room and sitting down on the small couch and closes her eyes, just for a moment. Then she lets out a long sigh. Opening her hand, she looks at the flash drive that she just slide from Jason's pocket while he was kissing her. Then she takes out her cell phone. "I need to see you. No...now. Tonight!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She signs out of the gate security. With the keys to Jason's truck, that she stole from the desk she climbs into the driver side.

She closes her eyes, taking a deep breath she thinks about what she's about to do _What the hell are you doing?_

She takes a moment and then turns the key, putting it in drive she heads off out of the parking lot.


	46. Chapter 46

**Chapter 47: Stupid plan**

"Where's CJ going?" Sonny frowns

"What do you mean where's she going? She was resting in the briefing room."

"Well I just saw her going out the security gate, thought maybe you sent her home"

"What? " Jason frowns concerned "You sure?"

"Well unless I'm seein' things. Then yeah I'm sure."

Jason runs to the briefing room, pulling the door open there's no one inside "Where the fuck's she gone?" He takes out his cell and calls the gate to be told she left half an hour previous. _Shit!_ "What the fuck is she playing at Sonny?"

Ray frowns as he joins them he can see the concerned looks on their faces "So, what's going on?"

"CJs gone walkabout." Sonny frowns "Jase, she's givin' me a really bad feeling here man!"

"Yeah this is not good." Jason calls her phone, but it diverts straight to voicemail "CJ pick up the damn phone. Call me back… ASAP! Davis get me a trace on that phone."

"No, she's switched it off. Last known location, here!"

 _Shit!_ " C.J what the hell are you up to?"

o-o-o-o-o-o

She arrives at the hotel. Reuben's seated at one of the couches in the entrance lobby, casually reading the newspaper. She shakes her head. She can't believe how calm he is just sat there with this all that's going on.

"Catherine.." he smiles as he gets up to greet her "how nice to see you again. I trust you're well. Though I have to say you don't look so good."

"We need to go somewhere private, so we can talk We' have things to discuss."

"Hmm! I don't think so do you? We can talk perfectly well just here. So, please join me" he gestures towards the seat in front of him

"Reuben don't fuck with me, this is serious!" She looks around. "I want Clay back… _Tonight!_ Please you need to tell me where he is"

"Tonight?" He laughs "And this is because?"

"Because if not, then probably all of us are going to end up dead tomorrow"

"I'm sorry, me dead, and how will that come about?" He laughs " I don't understand. The way I see it I'm the one in control, I have the hostage you want"

"Well I think there are others who may have different ideas or are you telling me that you sent Reagan, to the to the house tonight, looking for the file?"

"To the house? " He frowns

"He came to Jason's house; he wanted the file. Did you send him?" she frowns watching him. He hardly flinches "I didn't think so! Jason's calling off the exchange, after that. Says it's too dangerous. I need to know where Clay is, because I don't think Reagan gives a shit about your hostage, only getting the file which, I have."

She can see him thinking. Not that he gives a clue that he's really concerned about the turn of events. "And say I was prepared to give you that information, what are you offering me in exchange?"

"Anything!" She shrugs nervously "Whatever you want."

" You mean that ? " He smiles as he stands up from his seat. He gently strokes the side of her face "Anything? Really, now that does interest me" Holding her by her neck he looks her in the eyes. She tries to hold her nerve, he's trying to read her, trying to see if she's lying, what is her game "Then maybe you're correct and we should talk more _privately_ " he smiles

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Please...come in"

She sighs as she steps inside Reuben's suite. She looks around as he pours them some drinks "Not for me!"

"You sure. I mean, it might help you to relax."

"No!" She's actually tempted but refuses "Reuben, sit down!" He just stares as she gestures towards the bed "Reuben I said... _sit down!_ "

"I don't care much for your tone, Catherine" he frowns, as he sips from his glass. He walks towards her, staring her in the face and then puts his hand touching, against her cheek.

She pushes him away, now pulling a gun on him "I said _SIT the fuck.._.down!"

 _SHIT!_ He takes a step back as she catches him by surprise " Oh my god! Catherine, what the hell are you doing?"

"I need to know where Clay is, right now! I mean it Reuben, _right now!_ "

"Look calm down" he's hands signal for her to lower the gun "Catherine, for god sake put that down!" But frowns, staring at her but she doesn't flinch just indicates towards the bed for him to sit down.

"Catherine please just calm down!" He's has to admit, he's never seen her lose it like this before. It concerning him that she's this on edge, this unpredictable "Look say ... say, I did give you the address of where he is. How am sure you're not going to kill me after?"

"You'll have to trust me on that" she stares at him

"Well so you know" he sighs "I have a fail safe. If I don't check in every two hours, then I've ordered them to kill him"

"Well, I didn't expect anything less from you" She sighs as she nervously rubs the gun on her forehead while she thinks about what to do "Look just tell me, so they can get Clay out and then I'll give you the file, here tonight!"

"Why don't I just take it now?"

"Because I have a fail-safe too! I didn't bring it here, but I can get it but you'll have to take my word on that You'll get it but _only_ after I know Clay's safe"

" I have to take you at your word?" He laughs

"Yes, but you have my word" she sighs "…because I want done with this. I want out! Do you understand?" she stares at him "There's always going to be someone looking for it and sadly.. you're the safest person I know to give it to, "she laugh. "Reuben please, just tell me where Clay is? I just want him back safe."

Reuben sees her falter and dares to step closer "Come away with me. I'll keep you safe" he puts his hand on her cheek, but she brushes him away, shaking her head "No! That's not what I want. I don't want _you_. Reuben you and I we're done! Hell..." she laughs "there was no me and you only perhaps in your head. We had sex that was it, there has never been anything between us"

She looks at him, a look of regret on her face "I just want done with this whole thing. I want out!"

"Hayes!" He sniffs "You, want him, is that it?" he sips from his drink, watching her.

"Maybe? I don't know" She swallows nervously "But without that file, maybe I've got a chance at normal" she shrugs "Maybe I want that?"

"Normal?" he laughs "Catherine you're deluded. You don't want normal? People like us, what we've done . We don't do _normal!"_

She looks away she doesn't like his tone "Oh Catherine, don't kid yourself. You love the thrill and danger of all this too much to ever walk away" he sighs, taking a drink, draining the rest of his glass

"All those things we did, that's the past now. It's done and I'm not going there again. It's over! Do you understand?" she sighs "I'm tired and if I don't end this then… then it's going to get me or worse, those I care about killed. I've got too much to lose now"

"Do you remember what you were involved in?"

"Yeah and like I say it's done with!"

"No, I think…that might still all be on record? If you recall?"

"No.. not anymore!"

He looks at her suspiciously "How?" he frowns "Oh!..." He smiles and laughs "…you _can_ open that file can't you?" he watches for a reaction as she remains perfectly still "I knew it." he shakes his head "I knew it was worth keeping you alive"

She doesn't answer, just brushes back the tears of tiredness that are pricking her eyes "Please...just tell me where Clay is. I'll give you whatever you want" she softens and tries to appeal to his calmer nature "You don't need Clay anymore, so just put an end to this, now!" She looks away and sigh _This is not going to work. He's not buying it._

She shakes her head trying to hold her tears back. As she tries to regain her composure, in the split second her sees her drop her guard it's enough for him to smack her hard across the face. It takes her by surprise and dropping the gun, he takes the opportunity to grab her around the throat, pushing her back, pinning her against the door.

"Do NOT _ever_ point a gun at me again, unless you're about to use it!" He's up close against her face, smiling. He holds her against the door "Oh Catherine, it so didn't have to be like this" he rubs the redness on her cheek where he hit her "It could be so good. Deny it all you want, but we were good once."

She bites her lip and closes her eyes "Please, just tell me where Clay is, I'll give you what you want" she smiles, her face close enough that he thinks she's going to kiss him, she doesn't. He presses her against the door, his hand still on her throat. " _Owww!"_

She cries in pain and clutching at her stomach. He frowns, he can see the real pain in her face and looks down. He frowns as he lifts the hem of shirt where she's holding then looks back at her "What happened to you?"

"I told you!" _Owww!_ She grimaces, closing her eyes to the hurt "Reagan…he came after the file"

He lets her go and steps back, picking up the gun from the floor as he watches her "You want a drink?"

She lets out sigh of relief "Yeah!" she nods she knows she shouldn't, but she'll never get through this without one.

"Fine!" he thinks for a moment "I'll tell you where he is, but you _need_ to hold up your end or.." he pours the drinks "…or I _will_ kill you, but before I do I will make you watch while I kill Hayes and your son. Do you understand me?"

She swallows nervously, nodding her head as he passes her a drink. She takes a large mouthful. The tastes burns the inside of her mouth. It steadies her nerves and she closes her eyes while she savor the flavor.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

"Jason, it's me. Just don't talk, listen!"

"What the Hell are you playing at CJ, where are you?"

"Jason I said shut up! I don't have long"

Still he continues to lecture her down the phone making her more angry now "Jason please will you _shut the hell up!_ You need to listen carefully. I can't tell you where I am. That's not important, right now" she sighs as he looks up, Reuben watching her from the other side of the room where he's pouring my whiskey into his glass "I'm going to text you an address" she takes a breath "Just let me know when you have Clay!"

She sighs anxiously and cuts off the call before he can say anything else. "I'll have another drink while you're there!" She looks at her cell, keeping one eye focused on Reuben as she sends Jason a text.

She then smiles as she nervously switches the phone off and he hands her the glass. She takes a sip as he smiles at her "Now relax. Come. Sit here with me" he gestures to the space beside him on the bed.

Taking a deep breath, she's apprehensive as she sits herself down. He puts his hand on her cheek stroking it as he loosens her hair from the ponytail. Running his fingers through it. He has this permanent smile on his face as he watches her

"Um... I need the bathroom. I need to.. to clean-up!" he nods in agreement "Could you get me another drink, please?" she asks as she forces another smile.

"Yeah sure " He nods "There's no hurry, we have all evening"

She nods. She feels sick hoping the plan she just put in place works. Looking at her watch she knows she needs to play for more time though.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

 _Fuck_! Jason rubs his head in an alert panic mode now. As he reads the text his adrenaline starts to pump "Right!" he claps his hands for attention "Let's get geared up. I've got a location, but we need to move fast!"

"What for Clay?" Ray looks puzzled as they all spring from their resting positions "Where's that suddenly came from? Are you sure? How?" he frowns "Is it reliable, the intel?"

"Yeah I'm sure and don't worry how, we just need to move. We don't have a lot of time. C'mon people. We need to _move!_ " 

"About fuckin time!"

"C'mon yeah well stop flappin. We need to get this done. We have a short window of opportunity. Now MOVE!"

"Something we should know there boss?" Rays slightly worried by the speed at which he's gathering them together with seemingly no plan

"Let's just get loaded up, leave the worrying to me! We'll work an infil plan on the ground" As he speaks to his team a huge cloud of worried dread fills him as he re reads CJ message in his head.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"You've been a while?" Reuben frowns as he CJ leaves the sanctuary of the bathroom "I thought for a moment, you might be avoiding me" He smiles as he sees the look of concern on her face "Catherine, are you alright?"

"Yeah I'm fine" she smiles "Just cleaning up and sorting this wound out. Trying to make it more comfortable"

 _Hmmm!_ He frowns "I need to deal with him, for that and for going behind my back. Don't worry. He'll get what he deserves "

"Don't worry it's done now. As long as Clay's safe, that's all I'm concerned." She smiles at him as she slowly sips, what's now her third drink. She's stalling him and she can hardly force the drink down for nerves

"Catherine are you sure alright?"

"Yeah!" she nods "I told you, just worried about Clay"

"Well hopefully your _men_ should have him soon and then we can relax" he smiles. She nods. She hopes so too, and she hopes they get to him soon as she's not sure how much longer she can put Reuben off.

Her hand on her wound it aches, and she rubs her stomach

"Let me look"

She swallows apprehensively as he lifts her shirt again. He pushes her to lie back on the bed and she can feel her heart beating hard in her chest as he gently lifts the dressing back a little. She grimaces

 _Hmmm!_ He frowns he's angry and annoyed with Reagan as he plots how to deal with him. Now his hand continues to caress the rest of her stomach, moving further up under her shirt until he finds her breast. _Mmmm!_ He groans, smiling. Watching her, gently strokes his hand over the soft mound of flesh.

She closes her eyes and inside her head where once his touch pleasured her, turned her on now all it does is repulse her makes her feel sick even though she won't show it "I told you Reagan, came for the file. Why would he do that? If you didn't send him who did?"

"I don't know" He stops his hand. Watching her eyes. He sighs "Where is the file now?"

"It's safe"

"Safe?!" He sighs still staring her in the eyes watching the expression on her face, hoping to see some of the old spark from days gone by when they made love. He leans in and kisses her.

She holds out for as long as she can with him touching her before finally she can't stand the touch of his lips on hers and reaching into her side pocket, she pulls out the flash drive, holding it between their faces.

He stops trying to kiss her and smiles as he leans back "Well, well …" he laughs as he takes his hand from under her shirt.

He stands up, still smiling. She closes her hand around it. "Promise Clay will be safe first"

"I promise" he smiles taking her hand in his, softly caressing it as he gently opens her fingers. Very reluctantly she allows him to take the flash drive. She sighs as it leaves her hand.

She knows she has nothing now to protect her and she hopes BRAVO have got to Clay first

"Well there it is!" he smiles as he pours himself another drink while looking at the small black flash drive in his hand. Holding it up turning it over like some winning lotto ticket. But this time he's not going to be fooled and he switches his laptop on. Plugging it into the side.

CJ sighs with relief, his attention now focused on the laptop and not on her. She watches as he opens the files and sees the file he's interested in. He clicks to open it and as he does the password and encryption boxes flash up on the screen. "And? How do I get in this" he looks at her?

"And…"she gulps nervously "and, I'll unlock it when I know Clay's safe"

He smiles "of course, you will" he sips his drink. "I'm in no hurry. I can find things to keep me amused in the meantime. He looks at her sitting there on the bed "Perhaps you'd care for another drink?"

"Yeah! Another drink would be good!" she nods, closing eyes. Her mind's in a spin as she thinks how on earth she's going to stall him any longer.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Okay, we're on the clock. We need to get his done! Let's speed it up" Jason looks at his watch as they unload their gear at the address CJ sent him.

They enter the building. It's all quiet. They can see only two guys, watching a TV in the corner. Behind them is an office and the door is ajar.

Jason keeps watch as the others set up position, one eye on the guys in front and one eye on his watch for the time.

"Looks like just them two"

Ray nods. "Seems odd though. There were three left the house, plus Reagan"

"Yeah" Jason nods "Maybe they didn't come back yet?"

"You think Clay's in that room behind?"

"Would make sense. Don't look like there many other places to hold him."

"Jace, you sure this the right place?" Ray looks at him "How reliable is this intel?"

"It's as reliable as it gets" he looks Ray in the face "It's from CJ...she text me the address. Some stupid plan she concocted. Ray she's in danger. We need to get this done!"

Ray looks confused "what the hell's going on?... Jason, you know I trust you Brother but what's she playing at?"

Sonny's getting twitchy "Can we just get his done please. Get Clay then get the hell out. I'm getting a bad ju ju here"

"Sonny that corridor runs right around the building. See those double doors, you come around. Take Target 1 then cover us from that position. Ray you take Target 2 from here"

"Yeah sure. Let's just hope Spenser's in that room that's all."

"Okay! Let's get on this people, time is against us. Brave 4 …5 you keep watch outside there may be more en route. So, stay awake"

They keep watch a few more minutes then it's time to execute their plan

"BRAVO 1 this is Bravo 3. I'm in position. Got clean shot on target 1 Copy"

"Copy that, Bravo 3. You're hot to go"

"You ready Ray"

Ray nods

"BRAVO 4 we all good there?"

"BRAVO 1 all clear. Copy"

"All Bravo we go on three…Three…two, one Execute, execute, execute!"

The shots ring out around the empty warehouse. Both of the large men drop to the ground simultaneously. Bravo hold for a few more moments and when there's no further movement they move

Quickly crossing the empty building, there's nothing in it apart from the furniture the guys were sitting on. Jason holds the door covering Ray as they enter.

Theres' a ghastly stale smell as they spot Clay lying on his chest on the floor

"Oh Shit! BRAVO 4 this is BRAVO 1 we need medic now! COPY "

"Clay can you hear us! Clay…. Clay! Can you hear me brother" Ray checks him, feeling anxiously for a pulse "He's breathing." He sighs "oh man, he's in a pretty bad way"

"He's alive that's what counts," Jason rubs his head in relief as Clay slowly opens his eyes "Clay, we got ya buddy!"

Trent makes his way across with his medical bag as Sonny arrives in the doorway

"He okay? Please tell me he's okay?" he's breathing fast, wondering about Clay's fate. The state of the cuts on his back, the blood the awful smell. Sonny's really worried "He gonna make it, Trent tell me he's gonna make it?"

"He's not in good shape, but he's alive. We gonna do everything we can buddy"

"SHIT!" Sonny goes outside the room. They can hear him swearing and kicking the bodies of the men they just took down . Ray and Jason look at each other and both roll their eyes and then Jason shouts at him

"Okay Sonny that'll do! Let's focus and get this job done" he looks at his watch again "Let's speed this up and get him out of here. Stay awake we may have multiple tangos still out there"

Sonny picks Spenser up on his shoulders and carries him. "C'mon Blondie let's get you home"

Ray leads as they make their way back outside. They find a safe secluded spot where they can also keep watch.

"HAVOC this is BRAVO 1 we need medical exfil ASAP"

Trent starts to treat Spenser putting fluid lines up and Sonny helps him. Jason looks at his watch and sighs "Okay Sonny you stay here with Trent. Keep watch Brocks got over watch. If anyone comes back you take them out"

"Oh, don't worry they're mine if they come back!"

Jason nods and slaps Sonny on the arm "Brock you and Cerb stay with them. Help Trent… till exfil gets here" Jason looks around. Checking the scene "Keep an eye on them Sonny"

"Sure thing! Hell no one's getting near him now without coming through me."

Jason nervously checks his watch again "Ray we need to go. CJ needs us"

From the dim light of the alley way Reagan watches over them _Shit!_ He sighs before he disappears back into the darkness and is gone.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Reuben takes the glass from her noticing she's hardly drunk any from it in the past fifteen minutes. He frowns as he watches her , lost in her thoughts "What are you thinking about?"

"Nothing!" she smiles "I'm fine Just tired, it's been a um…long day"

"I'm sure it has" he brushes her hair back "You know I'll have him dealt with, Reagan, for what he did." He puts his hand around her neck, pulling her toward him and then gently he kisses her.

She musters a smile and shakes her head. She takes a deep, anxious breath and closes her eyes as a tear rolls down her cheek. Her thoughts are with Jason and Bravo, wondering where they are, if they've managed to rescue Clay yet.

"Don't be sad, Catherine " he wipes the tear for her face "just relax, enjoy it"

"As I said. I'm tired."

"Maybe we should go to bed then?" he smiles as he pushes down, lying her back. He again lifts the hem of her shirt this time kissing across her stomach. She groans in pain, closing her eyes trying to shut him out.

Watching her he smiles "Take it off" he indicates to her shirt

"Reuben …" She hesitates as slowly she does as he asks, with her arm bandaged and her side hurting he helps her pulling it up over her head until she's sat there in only her black lace bra

 _Mmmm!_ He smiles as he softly strokes his hands over her skin. "You are beautiful Catherine" he kisses her against her neck. "I remember how good we were together... no one has come close since!"

She swallows nervously as the touch of his hand on her neck, over her breasts it makes her skin prickle. He gently pulls he bra straps down her arms loosening the lace that covers her body, exposing he breast, her pert nipple hard with apprehension as puts his mouth against it kissing. She closes her eyes trying to bear it, afraid of what might happen is she doesn't. Knowing in her weakened state she won't be able to fight him. Her eyes glance around the room trying to locate her gun. Its on a side dresser too far out of reach.

"Relax... relax.." he strokes her hair as he feels her body tense "You do want this, yes? This is what you're offering me for Clay's life"

"Yeah, yeah .. if this is what you want to keep Clay safe then yeah. " she nods. She looks at the ceiling trying to stop herself crying as he drops kisses over her chest. His hand at the button to her pants, unbuttoning them

 _Oh god!_ She takes a breath, wondering, even though she's been here before with him, if she can go through with it now. Then as she moves _Aahhhhh!_ "Wait!" she cries out. Holding the pain in her stomach "I just need a minute!"

"No more stalling!" he pushes her back, more forcefully now as he tugs at her pants.

"Please I'm in pain, Reuben. Just give me a minute"

He's more aggressive now pulling at her. She pushes him back away from her, rubbing her arm as he grabs it "Awww!" she cries out, closing her eyes tight as tears roll down her cheek.

He takes no notice of her obvious distress, standing up he undoes his tie and takes off his shirt, ensuring to hang it carefully on the back of the chair. He smiles, watching her lying there, looking her over as he picks up his drink. He takes a sip still watching her "Take them off! Your trousers, take them off."

She takes a deep breath and slowly slides her combats off, dropping them on to the floor. She makes a quick scan of the table for her cell phone. She holds her breath as his fingers gently stroke the graze on her thigh "This happen earlier?"

"Yeah" she nods nervously "Reuben, please stop! Wait…"She takes a breath "I'm not sure about this now" She sighs as he starts undoes the buckle on his belt "Reuben I need a minute please I … can't do this. I thought I could… I can't… "

She suddenly stopped mid-sentence as the door to the suite bursts open and theres lots of voices and shouting in the room. CJ screams as the noise takes her by surprise

"Get back!... Get back!" She can hear Jason's voice call out "On your knees! .. I SAID ON YOUR KNEES! .. Put your hands behind your head, jerk"

Reuben looks at her as he slowly does as he's told. He, like her, keeps glancing at the gun on the side table. Jason notices it too, seeing his eyes look in that direction he smiles "Do it! Go on! Go ahead, DO IT you son of a bitch. Just give me a reason…and reason. " Jason screams almost willing Reuben to pick the gun up so he has reason to shoot him.

Ray picks the gun up before he zip ties Reuben's hands behind his back. He's smiling, looking at Jason with a smug grin. Staring until Jason can't stand it anymore and lashes out , knocking him down to the floor. Then he puts his gun right against his face. As he looks up seeing CJ on the bed, half undressed he fumes with anger "I should just shoot you now you sick son of a bitch!"

"Jason, calm down Brother" Ray's worried, worried he might actually go through with it "You don't want this man" he looks in Jason's face and gets him to lower the weapon "C'mon Jason, this is not you. Don't let him do this"

Jason sighs loudly rubbing his face, as he looks up he can CJ still sitting in the middle of the bed. Her body shaking uncontrollably "You okay?" he frowns with concern.

She can't answer, all she can do is take short deep intakes of breath as she tries to stay calm Oh Shit!"

Ray pushes Reuben onto his chest on the floor. He looks up and now as he looks at her, he starts to laugh "Oh, you're clever girl, Catherine. I should have been wiser, shouldn't have trusted you, and checked that text. That was a big mistake on my part." He closes his eyes, as Ray pushes his knee against his back "But you've made a _big_ mistake Catherine. I could have helped you, now you're on your own!"

Ray pushes his head down with his foot "Hey you, shut your mouth!"

Jason grabs at her, wrapping his arms around her as she sits there in a stunned silence. "It's okay we've got you, you're safe now" he sighs holding her head against his chest.

"Thank God! Oh, jeez that was so close!" her breathing is rapid, almost frantic as she clings to Jason's neck _Shit!_

Ray stands Reuben up on his feet but still Reuben laughs at them Awww! So, touching" he smiles "Question you need to ask her Mr Hayes. How far _would_ she have gone if you hadn't arrived when you did?" he smirks

"Ray shut him the hell up!"

Ray hits him in the back of the knee with the butt of his gun. He drops to the floor, but still he smiles. Ray pulls the zip cables tighter making sure he's secured. He can see the look he's giving is starting to rile Jason

"I told you, keep your mouth shut!"

Reuben can also see he's getting to Jason. He continues to goad him "You know she wanted it! She wanted me. Never had her say no to me yet!"

She closes her eyes "Jason don't listen to him, it's not true! I never wanted this, I wanted Clay back. I was never gonna go through with it!"

She looks, she can see how angry Jason is as he glares at Reuben. He's up close in his face now and Ray can see a look in his eyes, and he's worried what he might do.

"Jace man cool it! Don't give him the satisfaction Brother!"

Jason grinds his teeth looking at him "Ray's right, you're not worth it. Get him out of here!"

"MOVE!" Ray pulls him, and then shoves him out the door. He turns one last time and smiles "Catherine, this isn't over, remember that!"

She closes her eyes, shutting him out as she shakes uncontrollably from all the adrenaline.

Jason sighs, looking at her, the situation, what happened. What could have happened if he hadn't got there in time. Now instead of comforting her his anger turns on her

"What the _hell_ , were you playing at ? Do you how stupid this was?" he looks at her, standing in front of him only wearing her underwear. She has this look on her face, she needs him, but he can't be there for her. He's angry, scared. The look of disappointment he gives it hurts "Get your clothes on!" He picks her pants up from the floor and throws them at her. He doesn't want to be like this, angry with her but right now its all he knows how to do.

Jason please…" She cries as she reaches out to him "Well, at least tell me if Clay's alright?"

"He's alive. Trent's with him now" He sighs "Look, just _put_ your clothes on! I'll wait for you in the lobby"

She sits on the bed, and all the emotions she's held back flood her body, taking over her senses and she starts to sob. Oh, shit! The reality of the situation dawns on her and she puts her head in her hands as she continues to cry.

The suddnely she stops and takes a deep breath, gathering herself together. She notices Reuben's laptop on the desk and looking around all on her own, she removes the flash drive from the side, closing her hand tightly around it

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She sits in the quiet of the briefing room, holding a coffee. Jason enters the doorway with Blackburn in tow. "You okay now?"

"Yeah" She nods. Her body still shakes as the adrenaline calms but she's fine "How's Clay, can I see him?"

"All in good time. He's groggy but awake and he's talking"

"I'm glad"

"I'll take you to see him in a while" he shakes his head at her "Jesus CJ, you didn't leave us much room for error there, to get from Clay and get back to you.. what the hell were you thinking?"

"I don't know" she shrugs "It's the only thing I could do. We had to get him back and it was me he wanted. I knew you were never gonna give him what he wanted. He would have killed Clay. I had to do it."

Jason's still shaking his head. He look at her, sitting there in a pitiful state. He so wants to reach out, hold her but he's struggling in his head. The images of her, Reuben touching her when he first entered the room, he can't shake it off.

She looks at him. So desperately she wants him to hold her, tell it's all gonna be okay but he doesn't even speak. Just shakes his head and then walks out.

"Oh jeez!" she cries as he puts her head in her hands "Jason please…."

"He'll come around" Blackburn smiles apprehensively as he looks at her "You just need to let it all calm down. Been quite a night for everyone, including Jason. Look I'll havec a word with him later, talk to him"

She wipes her nose with hand and rubs her head as she nods "I hope so"

"Hey, you did good! We got Spenser back, that's good enough in my book. You need anything you let Davis know. Stay here, get some rest" he hesitates at the doorway "Oh and just need to make you aware. Reagan um… well he got away. He's MIA for now. So, don't go too far, until we know where he is"

Shit! she shakes her head "So this still might not over?"

"We'll find him"

"Oh, sorry Sir" Davis comes to the doorway "Can I have a word?

"Yeah sure … we're done!" He nods, acknowledging C.J before he leaves

Davis brings some clean clothes and lays them down on the chair. CJ looks at herself, she feels so dirty "Thanks. Um... how's Clay doing?"

"Sonny…well, he said they think he's gonna be okay."

Davis looks at her shocked, she's half the person she remembers from that first time they met. The strong, argumentative Lieutenant. Now like a shell of that person, tired, worn down. A mess. Thinking about what she's been though Davis wonders if she'd have been tough enough to endure what she has. She knows Sonny warned her not to, but she really does feel sorry for her.

"Lisa…. " she frowns quietly asking "Could you organise me some transport, to the hospital, to see Clay"

"I um… I'm not sure if you're supposed to go over there. I was told only authorised personnel for now. I didn't see your name on that list, sorry"

"What?" She frowns "Lisa, please! I need to see him; I need to talk to him. "

"I don't know. look I'll see what I can do, that the best I can say for now. Jason make the list.. you need to talk to him really"

"Okay. Thanks, I will" She rubs her face and runs her hands through her hair then changes her shirt and pulls the clean pants on before she heads back out into the office

Trent smiles as he sees her "Hey! How you doing?"

"Yeah I'm … well I'm okay2 she smiles "So, how's Clay?"

"He's awake and talking, but pretty messed up. Still he should fix in time."

"Trent, will you um… will you take me over see him? Davis is dragging her heels"

"Yeah okay!" he nods. "You had chance to talk with Jason yet"

"About what?" she frowns

"You know what!"

She shakes her head "No!...No, not yet I just need some time. He needs some time after tonight. I can't land that on him as well, not today."

"I'm sure he'll be please. But okay, don't leave it too long" he looks at her "Come on I'll take you to see Clay"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Hey, you!" she smiles so pleased to see him. She gasps shocked by how badly beaten he is. Gently she runs her fingers around his face, caressing each bruise one by one. Running her hand down his cheek as he manages a big beaming smile.

He's been waiting to see her, so happy she's here _Shit!_ "What the hell have you been doing?" he looks at her bandaged arm "Can't leave you alone for five minutes" he laughs

"Yeah I know!" She smiles, kissing his forehead and still gently stroking his bruised face. "Oh my god Clay, I'm so sorry! I should have put an end to it sooner! Are you Okay?"

"Sore!" he nods "But I'll get there. Just glad to be here and the painkillers are good" he points at the morphine drip at the side of the bed "Anyway, makes a change.."

"Makes a change?" she frowns

"Me being he injured party, though what happened? It looks like you've been in the wars too Are you okay?" He sighs, he can tell she's been crying "CJ, are you okay?"

"Hey, stop worrying about me it's just a graze" she laughs it off "I'll be fine!"

"So, what happened how did they find me?"

"They did that's what matters" she smiles awkwardly

"Come here, come close. Let me see you"

She swallows apprehensively knowing now he's back that she's going to have to try and keep a distance between the now.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing, just both of us need sometime. It's been a hectic night" she smiles trying not to cry, her emotions are on what feels like roller coaster "I need to go, I need a shower"

"You know this is the first time since I arrived that Sonny's left me alone"

"Yeah he's sure been worried about ya!" she looks down and smiles "We all have!"

Jason stands in the doorway and she looks around and smiles at him as he stares at her. "Oh um… I was just checking how he's doing"

Jason's close up behind her. Almost too close and he puts his hands on her shoulders. She feels awkward. It's almost like Jason's trying to make a subtle point to Clay about them being together. She guesses Jason's ego has been bruised by the Reuben thing and now he needs make his presence felt. But she's angry because this really isn't' the time or the place and she shakes his hands off her.

Clay's face drops he gets a funny feeling from the way Jason standing "Something going on? Something I should know"

"No! "she shakes her head "You just focus on you, on getting better.. We're all here for you, okay?"

The nurse comes into the room and gently sitting him forward she makes a quick inspection of the wounds on his back "I'll get you some clean dressings and change these again Mr Spenser!" she smiles.

CJ smiles "Thanks"

"She's nice!" CJ whispers winking " Is she looking after you okay?"

"Yeah she's is!"

"Hey Blondie, don't be charming all the nurses will you!" Jason laughs to him "How's he doing?" Jason shouts across to the nurse

"Yeah! He's a good patient" she smiles

"You say that now!" Clay grins "wait till I've been here a few days"

"I'll be right back in a minute Clay"

C.J watches them both, him and the nurse the way they interact with each other. "She likes you" she smiles as the nurse leaves the room

"No! No, she's just doing her job" 

Jason puts his hand on her shoulder again. "Right you. You need to rest, so, get some sleep that's an order and I need get you home, you need some sleep too"

She smiles at Clay "I'll come by and see you tomorrow" she kisses his cheek "Do as you're told, get some sleep" her face is still wet from tears which keep rolling down her cheek she brushes one away "I'm so sorry none of this should have happened"

"Hey, stop those tears. I'm fine"

Jason turns her around to leave "C'mon get you out of here. Catch you tomorrow buddy"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Before they leave the hospital Jason checks in with the Doctor to see how Clay's doing. C.J waits in corridor leaning against the wall, taking a breather "He okay?" she frowns as Jason gets back

"Yeah they said he should be. Just gotta keep an eye on what's going on in his head"

"Yeah " She nods "Yeah, I know that feeling. Something like this, can really take its toll" she bends her knees squatting down against the wall, wiping the large tears from her cheek.

"So, what he said, Reuben. What was your plan, at the hotel? What would you have gone through with it, if we hadn't got there ?"

The question takes her by surprise "What?!"

"With _him_ in the hotel. Did you have a plan? I mean other than to sleep with him."

"But you got there, so what does it matter"

"but what if we hadn't? Then what. Did you go there intending to sleep with him "?

"No!" She frowns "No honestly.. no, I didn't have a plan. And I wouldn't have gone through with it. I'd have stopped it. I'd have killed him first. I wanted to kill him. That's what I went there for" she sighs "Jason why are you being like this? Don't let him get in your head, it's exactly what he wants. Look we got Clay back that's, what you wanted"

Suddenly without warning Jason walks off "What .. wait Jason please… don't go!" She calls after him "Please, don't do this!" she rolls her eyes _Shit!_ "Jason come back!"

She cries trying to reach out to him but its too late he's gone _Fuck!_ She smacks the palm of her hand on the head, then slides down the wall to sit on the floor, her head in her hands. Shit! She grinds her teeth, trying not to cry. Trying to hold it all in.

Sonny's watching her as he comes back to sit with Clay for the night. She tries to hold it all back, she so doesn't want him to see her cry.

"You okay?" he frowns as he looks at her. He actually sounds concerned She shakes her head but doesn't look at him. "Pretty stupid if you ask me. What you did tonight. One hell of a risk you took there"

"Sonny I can't be dealing with you right now. Okay. So just go away" she looks at him, he's still staring at her "Sonny, fuck off and go do whatever you need to do but leave me alone. I did what you said, I did what it took to get Clay back!" she's finding it so hard not to cry now taking deeper breaths each time she speaks. The pain in her stomach and chest feels like it's going to explode "I thought that's what you wanted, to do what it took"

"Yeah I'm glad you did it" he sniffs "Still stupid though" he watches her seeing her hurting he does, just for once feel sorry for her "I'll remember it, that you did it for Clay"

"Yeah but …as normal it looks like it's gonna cost _me_ now, with Jason. He .. he won't understand."

"Yeah well, I can't do nothing about that. You made your bed where he's concerned so…guess you'll have to deal with it. I gotta go see Clay. Catch you around CJ"

She shakes her head as Sonny disappears down the corridor and she leans her head back against the wall and lets all her tears flood out _Oh God! Arrghhh!_

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

While she waits for Jason to finish up with Blackburn's debrief. She takes herself to the side office in the command room. Laying out on the corner couch she closes her eyes and soon drifts off to sleep

Jason takes a few minutes out to checks on her. He smiles watching her fast asleep. He stands in the doorway, arms folded just hovering.

A noise in the office gets his attention "Hey Trent, so everything okay?" He quietly closes the door leaving her asleep "Why you still here? You need to go home, get some rest"

"I was over checking on Clay. Sonny's still with him, don't think he's going home, wants to stay the night. Weren't no talking him around. "

"You want coffee?" Jason's smiles as he pours himself one from the machine.

"Sure" Trent watches him "Jace, can I um…can talk to you. It's kinda personal"

"Yeah" He frowns "Sounds ominous, what is it?"

"Look um…" Trent's sighs as he wrestles with his conscience "….I probably should have told you this sooner but um.. I'm kind' ve in a spot. I'm sure it's something I should divulge but Ive um…been thinking it over and well, technically she's not my patient so if this goes on record then that's what I'm gonna say " he takes a breath

"Alright what's going on?" Jason frowns concerned; hearing Trent speak like it this it's not normal. "Something wrong with CJ?"

"Yeah kinda. Look I don't know if this is the right thing or not or if it's even any of my business but um….you need to speak to her"

"About what?" he frowns worried

"Oh god this is awkward...she told me something shes um… well she's couple of weeks late." he nods "you know. …Late her…" he raises his eyebrows

"Late?" Jason frowns "I don't understand Late what's late? ….. Oh my god! Oh, that kinda late….shit! Wait she thinks she's pregnant?"

Trent nods

 _Oh shit!_ "Wait What… are you sure, I mean is she sure?"

"Yeah!" he nods his head "like I say I'm on rocky ground telling you, having treated her. I mean she already kinda threatened me, my career. But I dunno know I just thought you should know. That you need to speak to her before she does something else stupid"

"Yeah ... yeah thanks for that!" he frowns "oh and Trent, bringing this to me, you did the right thing. I'll talk to her"

"I got this so…" He hands him a brown paper bag "it might be a good idea, to be sure."

Jason looks in the bag "Yeah thanks"

Trent slaps Jason on the arm and leaves "Go easy on her! I'm not sure she's in a good place right now"

Jason nods "Shit!" he sighs as he bites his lip He leans back in his chair takes his baseball cap off rubs his head before putting it back on then gets up and heads to the briefing room. "Hey sleepy head!" she opens her eyes "You wanna wake up. It's time to go!"


	47. Chapter 47

**Chapter 47: You can't let him go**

Jason unlocks the door as they arrive back at the house. It's dark and completely silent. He checks around, looking at he mess they left and then he beckons her in. "Everything's okay, come in"

Tired CJ crashes onto the couch and let's out a long sigh. Just about ready to fall asleep she closes her eyes.

"No! No, don't lay there, let's go to bed. You need some proper rest "

"Okay!" Too weary to talk let alone reason with him about sharing a bed, she's just glad he's speaking to her, having been silent all the journey back.

Getting into the comfort of the bed he takes her by surprise as he wraps his arm around her, pulling her close to his body. She smiles thinking how nice it is as she closes her eyes. She's ready to sleep. Her head on this arm, curled against this side, so tired that its only moments before she drifts off to sleep.

Yawning and stretching her arms she leans over and checks the time on the clock. It's early. "Hey!" she frowns, Jason's already awake and he's laid on his hip, watching her.

"Hey!" he smiles, stroking her hair away from her face "You feel better after that sleep?"

 _Mmmm!_ "I could stay here all day!"

"Well why don't ya?"

"Um... because for one, we need to clean this house up. Then maybe go pick up our son?"

"Yeah. Yeah it would be good to get him back. You know, I think I'm gonna call Emma and Mikey again today"

"Yeah, good idea." she sighs closing her eyes _Mmmm!_ She snuggles against him "Listen..." she smiles contentedly "peace and quiet"

He smiles, placing his hand on her chin he lifts it then kisses her. _  
_

 _Mmmm!_ she groans it feels nice the taste of his lips on hers, the feel of his tongue in her mouth, him wanting her again. _Mmmm!_ "Jason ... what's this about?"

"Can't I just enjoy kissing you?"

He slides his hands down her waist, griping at her butt, pulling her body tighter to his. She sighs, but they don't break their kiss, their mouths locked. The firm of his lips against hers.

She wants him so much that she can't breathe, it's so intense. Looking him deep in the eyes as his tongue works its way over her mouth dipping in and out of lips, showing her how much desire he has. Then as he moans she can feel the hard of his cock, it's brushing against her thigh separated by only the thin cotton of his shorts. She smiles as he sits up looking at her body, the injuries the bruising "You okay?"

She nods "Yeah!"

He then continues, moving his kisses over her chest. His hand slides around her back and unclips the fastening on her black lace bra _Mmmm!_ She smiles feeling the warmth of his hand against her breast, teasing at the pert hardness of her nipple.

 _Oh God!_ She groans loudly. There's nothing excites her more than the soft touch of his hand on her body, thrusting her hips forward with very little acknowledgement to _the_ pain she's in. _Mmmm_! She rubs her hand over the hard of his cock, it's so ready and she wants it. "Jason, fuck me!" she gasp breathless to the touch against her.

"That what you want?" he teasingly smiles

She doesn't answer but forces her lips against his, her tongue probing hard inside his mouth. Oh she wants him and he knows it. Sitting up he slides her lace panties down her legs as his fingers dip between her thighs where the fabric covered moments before

 _Oh!_

she moans as he slides the two digits deep inside her, testing and teasing at her wetness "Oh! Don't stop!" she breathlessly begs as his thumb finds her clit. She forces her hips against his hand, willing and begging him to satisfy her needs . _"Oh God!... Jason … Please!"  
_  
He smiles sliding his shorts off, throwing them to the floor beside the bed. Then turning her over onto her knees. Better this position he thinks, so she doesn't have to take his weight on her wound. She's so ready and he easily slides his hard cock inside her, filling her with his entire length in one thrust. She moans loudly. Collapsing onto her chest, her arm unable to hold her weight. She buries her face into the pillow

"You okay?" he frowns checking she still wants this

 _Mmmm! "Y_ eah!" She nods pulling at the back of his thigh with her hand. Then finding his balls as he slaps against her, she pulls gently at them, showing him how much she wants him.

Despite the odd twinge of pain she thrust her ass back against his groin so he can fully fill, deep inside her. Then holding her hips he slams against her, thrusting with full long strokes, filling her warmth.

He closes his eyes. His thrusts get harder, faster and more wanton and she grips at the covers, trying to mask the pain that she's in. Gritting her teeth as he pounds her, the pleasure intense as his hand slides around to find her clit making gentle rubbing circles against it. Her wave of intense pleasure is building and she gasps trying to get her breath, her chest heaving " Oh fuck!"

Then he's carried away, lost in a space of his own. Fucking her hard, no gentleness, he wants this, he wants her, but shes finding it difficult to deal with the pains in her stomach

"Jason.. " she cries out. But its like he's suddenly locked out from her, in his own world and he stops trying to give her pleasure now, only interested in getting his. Giving her firm strong pumping thrusts ,pushing against her ass as he grinds into her.

She takes a breath wondering if she should get him to stop it's like he's trying to prove something . He's trying to own her, mark his territory "Jason. Stop!" she cries _Ahh!_ "Stop!" the pain becomes too much to bear and she takes deep breaths. Whilst she's use to him being forceful, this is different this is him taking what he wants, like she's not even there and just when she thinks she can't take any move she feels the wet of his warm cum. He pulls out covering her butt with his cream

"Oh fuck!" he groans _Mmmm_ "Oh god, that was so good!" he takes a deep breath. He rolls off laying beside her as she collapses onto the bed

Awww! she groans "What the fuck was that all about?" she frowns turning her head to look at him .

"Sorry…I'm sorry. I don't know!" he gasps for breath, his lungs fighting for air. He frowns wondering if he hurt her. He kisses her "Sorry. Are you okay?"

 _Mmmm hmm_! She nods, she doesn't move wet from his cum she gestures for him to grab the towel from the chair. He gently wipes himself and then cleans her up, stroking his hand across her ass, dropping kisses down her spine. _Mmmm!_ he smiles as he follows the curve of her body . She turns onto her side looking at him as he lays back next to her.

"It's okay!" she soothes his face "It's fine. I'm okay. What's going on with you?" she frowns, she's experienced this side of him before, when he's stressed, when a mission went wrong. A few times when things got too much.

He brushes her hair from her face and looks her in the eyes "Nothing... just a little tense I guess. Sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you"

"No!" She kisses him "No, its fine. I'm fine" she's watching his eyes as she runs her hand through her hair "I need to have a shower"

He nods getting up sliding his shorts on, still watching her as he stands beside the bed, he's nervous he has something to say but he's not sure how. She stands up pulling the bed sheet around her to cover her body as she heads to the doorway.

"CJ, I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me. I really... I didn't mean to hurt you" he has his hand on her face looking at her

"It's okay " She frowns. Standing in the bedroom doorway she can see how tense, nervous he is

"Look um... while you're in the um... bathroom." he coughs apprehensively "Why don't you do this?" He sighs pulling the brown paper bag from the side drawer of the table and handing it to her.

"What is it?" she frowns as she opens the bag. Inside she can see the pregnancy test. There's a look of anxiousness, and her face drops "How ... how did you um... you know about his?" She's confused, staring at the test trying to work out whats going on "Oh my god, Trent! " she shakes her head "I can't believe. I ...Oh my god, the son of bitch!" she closes her eyes for a moment trying to think

"Don't blame Trent he's only doing what he thought best"

"Don't blame him?!" she's angry now "What the … oh my god Jason" she laughs nervously "don't blame him, are you serious? He wasn't supposed to tell you. I .. I asked him not to. I told him to leave it to me! It's supposed to be confidential, what I tell him."

"You're not his patient!"

"Huh!" She gasps in disbelieve "What? You're serious?! Oh my god this is unreal! Well patient or not I asked him specifically not to say anything" she shakes her head in despair. She's worried _Shit! "L_ ook Jason, it's probably nothing, just stress. but whatever I'll sort it, you don't have to worry I'm not going to lumber you with another child"

"CJ I'm not worried" He puts his hand on her shoulders "Just do the test then we'll know what we need to worry about"

She closes her eyes, taking a deep breath. She nods. Biting her lip as she tries to keep her anger in control. Once again it feels as though things have been forced upon her, things she didn't want to confront. She's in a corner with nowhere to go. "Fine!" she nods and lets out a sigh calming herself "Fine if that's what you want, I'll do it "

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She takes a deep breath and opens the bathroom door "Jason..." she calls out ".. can you come in here please" She hesitates, not getting any response she calls again "Jason…" she listens, again silence "JASON! Please, I need to talk to you"

She frowns wondering if he's in a mood with her as still there's no response and she steps from the hallway into the living area where she stops. Frozen in her tracks she can't breath.

"Reagan!" she gasps looking as he stands holding a knife in front of her _SHIT!_ "How the hell did you get in here? ...Oh my god, where's Jason?" she swallows hard, starting to panic. As she turns around she sees Jason out cold on the floor. _SHIT!_ Her breathing quickens 'as a she wonders if hes alive or dead "What the hell have you done to him!"

"Oh, don't worry!" Reagan laughs " He's still alive, for now" he smiles, his eyes looking her up and down. Her stood wrapped only in a towel, fresh from the shower. Taking deep breaths, she's not sure what to do.

"You know what I've come for."

"No, and I don't have it any more" She knows if she hands over the list that she took from the laptop then they're both probably dead. "It's in Reuben's laptop, the CIA confiscated it yesterday when they took him in" she bluffs

"Reuben!" he nods "Ah yes poor.. poor Reuben. You know..." He laughs, looking at the time on his watch ".. I thought I'd have heard from him by now. Can't imagine what's keeping him."

"What?" She frowns confused "Well I'm sure the CIA are dealing with him." she shakes her head. "You won't be hearing from him for a while, if at all"

"Yeah and I would say, if they haven't by now then... then they will be releasing him anytime soon." he's still smiling at her "Oh what ? Seriously! You think they'll be able to hold him." he laughs "You really don't know his reach do you."

She shakes her head she's not sure what she thinks with the way he's acting. She does know she wishes Jason had killed him in that hotel.

"What?" She screws up her face to in to a frown "You're not making any sense. They're not gonna just let him go." she keeps shaking "He's involved in taking a Seal operative hostage"

"You do, you still really think they can hold him" he laughs more "Oh and he never took Mr Spenser, I did!"

She swallows hard and shakes her head more confused. None of this is making any sense to her. and she panics, wondering if he could be right that there is a possibility, that he's speaking the truth.  
"There is no way Reuben will get off. They know he was involved. We all know he was involved. They won't just let that go"

"I don't think what _YOU_ know will matter"

"But you came here looking for the file, he's not going to forgive you for that. You went behind his back . Why would you want them to release him?"

He laughs out loud "What you don't think he knew I came here?" he takes a breath "Oh c'mon, he sent me to scare you. If you were sacred you wouldn't know where else to go, so you'd go to the one person you knew. You'd go to him!"

" He played me!" she lets out a deep sigh "Oh my god!" she hangs her head at the realization she did go to Reuben because she didn't have anywhere else to turn.

"You know I have to admit..." he smiles " when he told me the plan I didn't think it would work, but I suppose if your all out of options, you'll do anything"

They both turn around looking the other side of the room as they hear groans, and Jason starts to get up .

Reagan smiles at her, she adjusts the towel she's wrapped in "I tell you what why don't I let you get dressed. You might feel a little more comfortable" he looks her up and down and flicks the front of her towel. She flinches "Oh, don't worry!" he smiles at the panic in her face "You're not _my_ type. I prefer blondes and I um...I wouldn't touch Reuben's cast offs" He laughs "Now _GET_ dressed! We're going to be taking a little trip, when Reuben gets here."

She stares at him for a few moments then taking one last glance at Jason she head towards the bathroom. She pushes the door to close it, but he puts his foot in the gap. "No! No, I don't think so! ...Leave the door open, I wouldn't want any surprises"

She swallows nervously as he stands watching, while she dresses herself.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

An Agent Anderson is assigned to Mandy as she interviews Reuben. She doesn't know him, and she doesn't like it but her higher command have informed her he's been assigned specifically, from Washington to assist.

"So, what can you tell us Mr …Thomas" Anderson begins the questioning "Is that what we call you?" He frowns as Reuben smiles.

He gives the agents a sneering laugh "I can neither confirm nor deny anything you ask but then I'm sure you are both very well aware of that. I assume you have spoken to your superiors, telling them I'm here?"

Ignoring him completely Anderson continues "We have some questions, with regards to the kidnap of a DEVGRU team member. What was your involvement Mr Thomas? "

Reuben leans back casually in his seat. He sniffs, clearing his throat "I'm sorry, is this a serious question? Again, I will ask, have you spoken with your superiors regarding this matter?" he watches their reactions "Why am I'm guessing not. Then perhaps you should, before we take this any further. Oh, don't worry I can wait"

Mandy frowns. She can't believe how smug and relaxed he is. She also doesn't like it. She has no idea what game he's playing, but something doesn't feel right.

"Ms Ellis..." He smiles watching her, he can see her trying to work things out , make some sense of what's going on "I'm sure you are aware that I can't divulge classified information regarding this matter"

"You're a son of a bitch! " she sighs staring at him "Do you think you're getting away with this? Because think again, you're not!" she continues to frown "You were part of a plot that saw a Navy Seal held hostage, and tortured. Do you think we'll just ignore that? Because we won't. Reuben, you're going to jail for a very long time, for what you did"

His face is filled with a large grin followed by more smug laughing as he stares at her "Ms Ellis, as nice as it is to speak with you again I'm bored now" he sighs and looks at his watch "You know, I hope you don't take too long with my phone, sifting the limited data they'll be able to extract. I mean who knows what _scandalous_ things they may uncover." he smiles at her

"Oh my God!" she sits, staring at him in disbelief suddenly feeling very uncomfortable

"Oh, don't worry, I'm sure they've seen it all before , just um..." he coughs " just perhaps just not of you?" he laughs

"You really are one high level asshole. God, I should have listened to her"

"Well I am shocked that no one warned you. Really...I certainly thought Catherine would have filled you in. But perhaps you tried not to believe her" he bites his lip looking her full in the eyes "It's a shame you now feel that way about me, I thought we got on rather well" Agent Anderson is frowning unsure as to what's going on "Look Anderson, I seem to have upset Agent Ellis now."

"Wait?! " Anderson frowns "How did you know who I was? How do you know my name?"

Mandy tries to ignore him and move on to more questions "So, what have you done with the flash drive? She said it was in your possession"

"I have no idea what you are talking about " He shakes his head "I will say for you to keep one thing in mind, Ms Lewis is a very confused drunk, she needs treatment." He takes a deep breath " in fact as you saw her obsession with me and how it got out of hand. I mean you witnessed yourself her threatening me. So, who knows what accusations she might make" he frowns watching as she fidgets in the chair "But I am guessing by the fact you are asking me about the laptop that means, you don't have it either? Which does interest me."

"This is bullshit Reuben and you know it. She didn't have an obsession with you, but you did have a Tier 1 operator kidnapped. "

"What possible reason would I have to do that? If you remember I told you and Ms Lewis I would do you a favor and peruse the case file. It was my intel that was able to give Ms Lewis an address for the whereabouts of your operator" He smiles " I did _you_ the favor. But of course, I cannot, as you well know, reveal an intelligence source" he stops to watch her reaction " Now .. do you think it would it possible to get a coffee and move this along? I need to go soon."

He appears under no pressure and Mandy can't believe how cool he's acting. "Get out of here?" She laughs " If you think you're getting out of here well...you're not So, I would start cooperating, help yourself"

"Is this interrogation tactic Ms Ellis" he laughs loudly " I mean does that kind of statement normally work?"

He's laughing at her. It's frustrating and it makes her angry "You know what Anderson, how about we take a ten-minute break. Let him take some time to think how you can help himself"

Anderson nods. He too is fed up with the smug remarks.

"So, any chance of that coffee?" Reuben smiles

"No!" she leans over the table staring at him " No chance. You get nothing until you start to co-operate"

Pacing in the corridor outside the interrogation room she lets out a long and frustrated sigh. Blackburn and Anderson can see how angry she is _Arrrghh!_ "You know I can't believe his attitude"?

"He sure is an arrogant son of bitch!" Blackburn folds his arms and shakes his head "Okay how you wanna play this?"

"He's certainly cool "Anderson sighs " I mean he could be facing years in jail, but it doesn't seem to register. Almost like he knows something we don't. Almost..." He frowns "like he's certain he's going to get away with it"

"No!" Mandy grinds her teeth, shaking her head "No, he's playing us, but I'm not having it."

"Well, we're gonna have to let him stew a while, he's gonna be a tough nut to crack, gonna take some time. I mean not being funny, he knows all our techniques. Hell, from what I know of him, he probably invented some of them"

"I don't like this." Mandy frowns "We need to find that flash drive... it links him, I'm sure it does. That's why he's so calm he knows without that we've got nothing."

They all turn around at the sound of footsteps. Blackburn frowns concerned as Harrington comes striding towards them. With him is as an extremely tall, lanky man in a suit, a small pair of silver spectacles sat on the end of his nose.

Mandy frowns as she sees them, though she doesn't know who he is she does recognize him. Having seen him before lurking in the background at CIA briefings. She never recalls him speaking but she does remember something about his presence and he gave her the creeps.

"Commander Blackburn, what the hell's going on here?" he nods towards the one-way glass "Is that him, in there?"

"Yeah that's the son of bitch involved in the abduction of Petty officer Spenser, Sir"

"Cut him loose!" Harrington shouts, a furious look on his face

"Sir, sorry what?! Sorry, Sir did you say cut him loose? Are you joking?... Sir!...Did you not hear he was involved with Clay Spenser!"

"I said _CUT HIM_ loose, that's an order Commander!"

"Wait, Sir I don't understand?" Mandy frowns "Sir... we can't let him go he's wanted in connection with kidnap and torture of a Tier one operator, one of ours"

"I am quite aware of the situation. Thank you Ms Ellis" he sighs loudly, staring at her. "but next time you decide to bring a special UK intelligence agent in for interrogation, then perhaps would run it past some one more senior before you almost start a diplomatic incident"

"What? …. But sir with all due respect"

" _With all due respect_ Ms Ellis, I've spent the best part of the past hour getting my ass chewed by someone in Washington who's had their ass chewed by the head honcho at SIS in the UK! That _Ms_ ELLIS is that's not an experience I wish to repeat and if you value your career then you will do as you are told!"

"But sir… we can't let him go. We don't know what he's involved in. We have more questions"

"If I may interject into the conversation Ms Ellis…" the lanky, be speckled man is English but very quietly spoken

"Sorry do I know you?" she focuses her gaze on him

"Oh, please my apology. Where are my manners I should introduce myself, Agent Wade international special operations" he speaks slowly, calmly and each word enunciated with care "I think it would be best, under the circumstances, for you to do as you are told" he stares at her coldly

"And what..." Mandy furiously glares " do you have to do with this?"

"How I am involved does not matter" he still shows no emotion, still calm and unhurried. Mandy just can't read him at all "I am just here to make sure Mr Thomas is released, as soon as is possible"

"And how the hell did you know he was here?"

"I received information and it has proved correct"

"But we haven't let him near a phone? Wait, did someone tip you off? Someone from here?" she frowns concerned that they have a leak in the department. Only minimal personnel knew Reuben had been brought to the base.

"Ms Ellis please do not ask questions I cannot answer"

"Son of a bitch! C'mon you're not really authorize letting him go. Tell them! Eric, this can't happen you have to stop it" She stares at Blackburn as he rubs his head confused and frustrated "Wait, you are, you're just gonna let him walk. Sir..." She turns to Harrington "Sir you can't be serious? Jason's' gonna go mad when he finds out "

Blackburn looks at the two-standing next to him "I'm sorry Mandy it doesn't look like we've got much choice"

"Ms Ellis" Wade interrupts "Master Chief Hayes is of no consequence in this matter. This must happen and without question. Is that clear?"

"No! No, it's not clear! I will be taking this further up the chain of Command. I will get this stopped"

"Ms Ellis, I know you think you have influence but let me assure you this order has come from the very top. So, I don't know where you think you're going with it?"

Harrington shakes his head "Ms Ellis, believe me when I say, this came from so far down the rabbit hole even I don't know where I was" he signs he too is frustrated too and doesn't like it one little bit either "Look on personal level I feel your pain. This was one of our guys, so it doesn't sit well with me , but looks like the SOB has got friends in high places. His involvement is being seen as a covert operation"

"Covert operations? No... no!" She shakes her head "Well I hope you know what you're are going to tell Clay and the rest of the team because they are gonna be pissed. And what about the risk to Catherine Lewis. You do know that he threatened her several times and with him back out there. Well, if something happens to her, I hope you can live with it because Jason will never forgive you."

"We'll give her some protection, keep an eye on things. If there is a credible threat then we'll be aware of it. but you need to cut him loose" Harrington nods, gesturing to Anderson

As Reuben comes the door, adjusting the knot on his tie he smugly grins at Mandy "Well gentlemen … Ms Ellis. It's been entertaining. Is there any chance I could get my phone back please?"

"Wade nice to see you again!" He nods to the tall geeky guy "You're a long way from home."

"Reuben" he nods acknowledging him but that's as much conversation that they exchange.

"Mr Thomas this way …" Anderson indicates down the corridor "follow me, we'll collect your belongings and hope you'll accept my apologies on behalf of the agency"

"What the hell just happened here?" Mandy shakes her head, she's furious as she looks at Blackburn

"I don't know?" he sighs "but he sure as hell must carry some serious weight for Harrington to order that" he folds his arms shaking his head "The son of bitch has got some friends in high places to get this sort of favor"

"Well I'll leave it to you to tell Jason!" she looks at him and sighs "this was no covert operation and you know it"

"Let's keep an informal eye on him for now. His favors will run out at some point." he sighs "In the meantime … let's just concentrate on reigning Jason in!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

CJ starts to get dressed pulling her combats back on with the towel still wrapped around, covering her breast as Reagan stares watching her dressing. She pulls her shirt over her head and then pulls the towel from under it. It makes him smile but bored by her her, he decides to leave heading back into the living area.

 _Pheww!_ She runs some water to wash her face and as she does she sees her cell phone light up with a call. She sighs. Luckily she had it on vibrate when she left it by the sink. It's sitting next to the pregnancy test she took earlier, before they were interrupted.

Checking the doorway she throws her towel over them, dropping the hidden items to the floor. She bends down to put her sneakers on and then, subtly, picks up the cell. Swallowing nervously, continuing to watch the door. She hits answer on the call. She doesn't dare speak.

"CJ?" she can hear Ray's voice, but she stays silent, just making a small coughing sound so that he knows she's there "CJ are you there?" she coughs again "CJ ?... answer me!" Ray frowns "Someone picked up, but they're not answering."

Ray looks at Sonny confused. He puts it on speaker and they both listen. All they can hear is the muffled coughs. Ray folds his arms as they both look at the phone laid on the bench. Still no answer but the call does not end, the continuous even spaced coughing sounds.

CJ sighs, she has no idea if Ray can hear her, but she leaves the call engage and places the cell in her back pocket. "So now what?" she shrugs at Reagan as she enters the living area

"Now... now we wait!" he smiles

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Ray looks at Sonny "You hear that?"

"Yeah I heard something, sounded like someone coughing?!"

"What the hell's going on there?"

"You think we should take a trip around the bloke to Jason's?"

"Maybe we just swing by. Something don't feel right. I just tried Jason's' cell he not answering either "

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She looks at Jason, he's now sitting upright on the floor. They've taped his hands together and she's really worried about him

"Can I get something to clean his head up" she frowns at the sight of the blood running from the large gash on the side of his head. For a moment she wonders how he did it and then she sees Mikey's baseball bat on the floor, guessing they hit him with that "Reagan please. you can't leave it like that"

"Oh why not." Reagan sighs unfazed "Just don't try anything stupid. I have been told he's expendable"

She swallows anxiously, nodding that she understands. She looks at Jason and smiles "You okay?" shes so worried. for just a few moments she thought she'd lost him for good He's dazed and his head hurts, but he nods.

She takes at deep breath, standing in the kitchen. She gets one of the clean dish towel and bowl, running some warm water into it. Watching the doorway closely, she sneaks the phone from her pocket "Ray can hear me?" she quietly whispers

"CJ?"

"Don't talk … this has to be quick!" she doesn't dare take her eyes off the doorway "Jason's hurt. We have three hostiles in the house. Including... Reagan" she breathes deep, so nervous about getting caught "He says they're gonna release Reuben? Tell me that can't be true. That's who he's waiting for. Look, I've gotta go. I'll leave this call open as long as I can"

Ray wants to speak but doesn't. He looks at Sonny willing him for advice "Shit Sonny!.. We need to get over there. Let's get Trent and Brock before we go"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She comes back with water and the cloth and starts to gently wipe Jason's head "Really are you okay" she looks in his eyes

"Yeah, bit sore but I'm good" He nods and smiles "What about you are you alright?"

"yeah!" she smiles "Yeah, I'm fine" She turns to look at Reagan "So, what's gonna happen when you get this file?"

"Who knows what Reuben's plan is. I do know the call I took this morning that he was pissed about being locked up overnight " he laughs "So... I'm sure he'll want to take that out on someone" he smiles at them both

If Reuben is really coming back then they have to work out how to get out before he gets there; She's worried about the threat he made to kill Jason and JC , about him carrying it out. She sighs, trying to think as she cleans the cut on his head, leaning forward close to him "Jason are you really alright?" she asks Jason she's worried, he's gone quiet, rubbing his head

"WAIT!"

She turns suddenly, worried by the tone Reagan uses as he shouts at her, but she doesn't move

"Stand up!" he frowns watching her "I said… STAND UP!" She still doesn't move, and he grabs her pulling her to a standing position "What's that?"

She stays silent as he twists her arm behind her back turning her around, shoving her face hard against the wall. Having noticed the cell phone he pulls it from her pocket, seeing it connected to a call, Ray's number "Well this was stupid!" He sighs pulling her around to face him "Anything else you need to tell me?"

"No...No, nothing I swear" she swallows hard "The phone was it" He searches her all over, feeling in her other pockets. She tries to resist his prodding but it's her bad arm he has hold of and she can't move.

"Oh my!" he smiles "Well, what's this?!" he puts his hand in her front pocket and pulls out the flash drive. He turns her around so he can see her face, then thumps her back to against the wall

"Hey," Jason shouts pulling against his restrained hands " leave her alone!"

"Shut him up!" on the command from Reagan other guy in the room kicks Jason hard in the ribs as he lays on the floor

"Please...STOP!" She cries out begging "You don't need to do that...he didn't know!"

Reagan smiles, hearing the pain in her voice and he holds her, so she witness as the guys keep kicking him She closes her eyes tight. She can't watch "Stop it!...Pleeeease! That's enough!"

He brushes his mouth against her ear "That was a very, very stupid thing to do"

Holding her arms locked behind back and nods to one of the one of the guys who just gave Jason the kicking. He turns, pulling his fist back, he's punches her in the face. She grimaces, and Reagan lets her drop to the floor "Oh Shit" she groans as she drops down, there a tug and a tearing feeling. A pull at her wound and it starts to bleed through the dressing

"No!" Jason screams out

She's hold her stomach her eyes fill with tears and she sits back on her heels trying to breathe through the pain. Jason's trying to move himself around so he can see her. She's still holding her wound and looks up, as her eyes meet Jason's.

"I told you _not t_ o do anything stupid! "Regan rubs his head frustrated with her "You just won't listen"

"I'm sorry!" she gathers herself on the floor holding her stomach, she closes her eyes tight

"We're gonna have to move to the location sooner than we thought. Get the van around to the front"

He yanks her ponytail and pulls her up by it. " _Awww!_ " she tries to hold his hand to stop him pulling her hair as he does there's a vibrating tone. His cell phone rings

"Finally," He pushes her once again face against the wall and holds her there "What took you so long. …. No, we have to move. Miss Clever here has alerted them to our presence, but I did find something in her pocket you'll be interested in" he smiles as he looks at the flash drive in his hand "What about him? You want us to bring him or dispose of him?"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o


	48. Chapter 48

C **hapter 49** **: Are you serious?**

Ray and sonny sit quietly watching as they load Jason and CJ in the back of the SUV

"What you thinking Ray, you wanna do a moving stop and extract?"

"With just us, without Jason and Clay" he shakes his head "it's a hell of a risk to get the two of them out. It could be too dangerous. I suggest we follow for now, then work a plan. Let's see where they're taking them."

"Whatever you say Ray, it's your call. You know I've got ya back on this."

"Okay, then we hang tight" He strokes his beard hoping he's making the right call "Get Trent and Brock to follow up. I'll call Blackburn, get him up to speed on the sitrep"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason and CJ find themselves on the floor in the back of the vehicle. Jason's hands are taped together but CJ is loose. They're laid face to face "Jason, are you okay?" she's worried "I'm sorry, I wish I could have stopped him before"

"Hey, not your fault. I'm okay!" he sighs "Are you alright?"

"Kind of" She nods, grimacing as she tries to turn on to her back so that she's not laying on her bandaged arm. She's also trying to counter the pain in her stomach wound which hurts a lot more now.

"Any idea where they might take us?"

"No!" She shakes her head "No idea."

"Hopefully Rays on it, that he has a plan."

"I hope so. Do you really think they'd let Reuben go?"

"I don't know what to think. If they did, then I don't know why. If Mandy does her job she'll make sure they don't."

As the vehicle turns sharply, shes not able to hold on and rolls over, it causes her pain "Oh god!" She grimaces as they get thrown around in the back. "I can't do this!" she sighs

"Hey c'mon, we can get through this" his hands may be taped but he puts them against her cheek, gently stroking it. She smiles, touching his face softly with her hand.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Sonny, keep your distance man. We don't want them to notice us tailing them"

"Bravo 4, this is Bravo 2, do you copy?"

"Copy Bravo 2"

"It looks like we're on route to the preserve woodland area, copy"

The preserve is a large forest area. It has a large lake and is well known for its good fishing and hunting. The roads on the way there are deserted and with noticeably less traffic Ray's worried they'll be spotted

"Where you think they're headed?" Sonny frowns

"I have no idea, but you're gonna have to back off, they're gonna spot us but just try not to lose them" he takes a breath and calls in "HAVOC this is Bravo 2, you got eyes on us, copy"

"Bravo 2 just catching up on the sitrep then we'll be on it, copy"

"Copy that HAVOC just don't lose us. You give us any reference as to where they might be headed, Copy"

"BRAVO 2 working on it. From the map, there are several lakeside lodges around, anyone could be a potential location"

"Copy that HAVOC. Standing by for update"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

As they drag her from the darkness in the back of the vehicle, CJ blinks her eyes. Looking around she has no idea where they are. She stares, frowning, at the large wooden cabin in front of her. They are surrounded by trees with lake. She also notices that another vehicle is already there.

"Where the hell is this place?" She looks around back to the van as she hears a thudding sound. She watches as they pull Jason out, dropping him on the ground.

"Get up!"

Jason struggles to stagger to his feet, finding he has a gun now forced against his waist. They march them both forward inside the cabin.

CJ nervous and swallows anxiously, both of them wondering where they are and what's going to happen and then suddenly, without warning Reagan grabs her by the back of her neck, forcing her inside the doorway. Pushing them both to the floor in the corner of the room.

 _Awww!_ She sighs the pain in the wound on her stomach, really hurts now. She puts both hands on it and closes her eyes.

Jason watches her, he rubs the side of his head which is also sore. "CJ, you okay?" he whispers. He's concerned about her, he can see how worried she looks "You know, we're gonna get out of here. Are you listening, it's gonna be alright, I promise"

She smiles though she doesn't share his optimism. She's not confident there's any way out, for either of watches as Reagan pours himself a drink and then he turns, smiling at them. He sneers at Jason's, thinking how much he doesn't like him.

"Any problems?" the voice comes from the other room.

"No, nothing I couldn't handle"

"Good!"

 _Oh shit!_ CJ takes a deep breath, closing her eyes as she recognizes the voice. _Reuben!_ She gasps as his shadowy presence fills the doorway.

"Catherine" He smiles ".. and Mr Hayes. So, glad you could both join me" he walks into the room, he's also sipping from a drink. He doesn't stop smiling as he smugly grins at them over the rim of the glass.

"You piece of shit, I can't believe they let you go!"

"Why the surprise Mr Hayes?" He smiles " Did you miss me, Catherine?"

"How the hell have they let you go, after what you did to Clay?"

"I told you Catherine… "He laughs " this … "he holds up the flash drive, twisting it around in his fingers "… this list, equals power and control" He takes another sip as he continues to smirk enjoying tormenting them "Now, you're here, come have a drink with me."

"I don't think so" She shakes her head, as she looks at Jason.

Reuben stands over them, still smiling and then he makes a sudden grab of her neck, pulling her up "That wasn't optional!"

"Leave her alone! Haven't you done enough?" Jason struggles, trying to get up but the two hired muscle push him back down.

"I'm sorry Mr Hayes, that invitation wasn't for you."

"Reuben… please don't" She closes her eyes; she knows Reuben will try and mess with Jason's head. Goad and torment him. He smiles, stroking her face.

"Hey asshole, why don't you take it out on me. Be a man"

"Oh, Mr Hayes, don't worry. I will deal with you in good time but for now, Catherine and I have unfinished business" He's at the desk and he opens the laptop, setting an already filled whisky glass next to it " _Sit!_ " She swallows nervously, thinking about resisting. But as she shakes her head he forces her down into the seat "I said _SIT_ down!"

Then plugging the flash drive into the side of the laptop, he turns the screen around to face her. "Now, it's time to do what you've been asked, and open that file."

She shakes head. She knows the minute she opens that file Jason and her, are dead. "No! …You can go to hell."

"Fighting words" He smiles, he's pacing the room drinking his drink "But don't make this painful. It's quite unnecessary, just get it done and I'll let you both go."

She laughs, staring at the files as they appear on the screen. Her brain working overtime trying to find a way to stall until they can think of something that helps get them away.

She continues to stare at the screen, and takes a deep breath. She looks up, her eyes pleading with Reuben "Let Jason go, and then I'll do it" She's nervous and without even thinking, she sips from the drink that he poured as she wipes the beads of sweat from her forehead "Did you hear me? I said, let Jason go, and I'll open it. That's the deal" she bites her lip,"Reuben, you have my word"

"C.J don't do it!" Jason frowns. He looks at her but she's still staring at Reuben and she ignores him

"I promise. Just, please let him go!" She scratches her head, pulling her fingers through her hair. Then she feels the twinge in her wound, and she places her hand against it. It's hurting alot more now, being shut in the back of the van, rolling around didn't help.

"Is that painful?" Reuben curiously asks

"A bit" she nods, confused by what seems his sudden concern

He smiles stroking her hair and then he gives a nod to his muscle. They drag her from the chair, throwing her onto the floor and then hold her down.

She panics. Worried that maybe he wasn't showing any concern "No!" she gasps "Oh my god, what are you doing?" She fights with him struggling to get released from his grip, scratching at his face "Reuben please what are you doing?" frightened she screams out "Please let me go!"

"What the hell are you doing?" Jason tries to get up. Reagan smiles , pointing at him as the other muscle in the room pushes him back "You stay there or I promise, she will regret it" he's angry, glaring at Jason

"I said leave her alone what the hell are you doing?" He's not happy, but scared to move for now "You son of a bitch" he shakes his head "Take it out on me"

"Please…" She shakes her head looking up "Reuben, what are you doing?"

Reuben is at the drink's cabinet. He picks up the salt cellar off the tray "I'm not messing with you any more Catherine. I warned you that I want this done, now!" And then without a second chance, he pulls back the dressing on her wound and he empties all of the salt, from the glass bottle, straight onto it.

 _Arrrgghhh!_ She screams in agony, the pain sears through her body. She screws up her face, tears fill her eyes as the salt burns at the open wound on her flesh. _Arrrrghhhh! Oh god!_ she can't breathe, can't speak trying to overcome the pain.

"You piece _of shit!"_ Jason shouts out as he gets up and pushes, forcing himself against the hired help angrily trying to get to Reuben.

Then letting her go, the muscle in the black leather jacket turns around and punches Jason hard in the stomach. Jason crumples, doubled in half with pain, and falls to the floor

"I warned you Mr Hayes!"

She curls up in a ball. The pain, forcing air from her lungs, tears streaming down her cheeks. She looks up as Reuben is up close against her face "Now if you don't want this to get so much worse, for either of you, then…" he strokes her hair " just do yourself a favour and _open the damn file_ "

He grabs her hair, pulling her up, forcing her back into the wooden chair. Pulling the laptop around in front of her. She takes a deep breath, staring over towards Jason as she debates what to do now. She knows she's too weak and won't be able to stand much of Reuben's punishments

Jason can see her looking, and he shakes his head "CJ don't do it. Don't give in to him"

She grabs her hair rubbing it where he pulled it and breathing through the pain. Getting herself together. She drinks the rest of the whiskey in the hope that it will numb her to the pain her body's in. Then she rubs the tears from her face as she tries to think.

Jason closes his eyes, he doesn't know how to help her and Reagan smiles watching them both exchanging glances "It's painful, isn't it Mr Hayes, watching her struggle, not being able to help her, not able to be her hero." he stands his drink down and then he takes his turn to kick Jason hard in side of ribs.

She can't look as she hears Jason cry out in pain. She stares at the screen then closes her eyes.  
The more she hears Jason groan in pain the nearer she puts her hand to the keyboard then finally she relents

"Alright stop! ENOUGH!" she takes a deep breath "I'll do it, alright I'll do it but please… please just stop" She wipes a tear from her cheek and puts her hands on the keyboard and then she starts to type, entering the first password authentication.

Reaching for her drink on the desk. As she does her eyes light up, she spots the envelope opener in the desk tidy. Gulping what's left of the drink down she passes the glass back "Get me another"

She stares at Reuben as he takes it from her "Certainly, he smiles "Nice to see the real Catherine back."

"CJ…" Jason frowns as he realizes how much she's already had to drink "CJ please stop. Don't drink any more" He's worried, her drinking, it will make her even more vulnerable

She coughs while he turns his back getting the drink. She checks behind her. Reagan is in the other room and the muscle is making sure Jason stays put, they have their backs to her. Then she carefully, and quietly slides, the envelope opener from where it is, across the desk and down onto her lap, wedging it between her legs.

 _Pheww!_ she takes a deep breath, her eyes focused on Reuben. She breaths slow and deep, calming herself. He still has his back to her pouring the drinks as she continues to type the first required passwords. He sets the drink down in front of her and she stares at the glass knowing she really shouldn't touch any more but she's finding it hard not to. The thought of that taste in her mouth and she can't resist, taking another swig of the warm whiskey.

Jason sits himself up he's watching her. Intently willing her not to drink any more "CJ please don't!"

Reuben smiles shaking his head at his pathetic attempts to stop her drinking "Is it open?" he asks. He's impatient.

"No" he shakes her head "I need to download the encryption software" She looks at him out of the corner of her eye "it will take about fifteen minutes" she rubs her head

"Very well" he nods "Do what you need"

"Nothing I'm doing it now" She sets the programme running. It was an extra fail safe after she added to the files when she last opened it in Harrington's office. _Thank god I did_ she thinks, it buys them some more time. Then she takes another sip of the drink hanging her head down knowing she shouldn't but the pain in stomach is much worse now and the drink is helping

Owww! she cries out. Two big droplet tears drip onto her lap. She wipes her face and looks over her shoulder at Jason and then suddenly they all look up. There's a loud clatter of things falling over outside.

She sits bolt upright in the chair and looks towards the window. Reuben heads over to look  
"What was that?" he's staring both ways outside. He looks at the guys and Reagan "Find out what that was!"

Reagan nods his head "You two, come!" he's concerned "Let's see if we've got ourselves some company" he takes the two guys with him as taking their guns out they head outside.

o-o-o-o-o-o

She looks around, again checking on Jason. Her heart beating so much faster now. He gives her a look that confirms what she also thinks. Maybe Bravo are here. She closes her eyes and sighs, wondering if they might be okay after all.

Rubbing her head shes nervous but she's going to have to stall him "You know what? I can't do this" she bites her lip

Reuben turns from the drinks cabinet to look at her. He's frowning while pouring two more drinks. He smiles "What can't you do Catherine?" he questions, then he picks up the fruit knife, to cut some of the lemon. She watching him, he's turning the knife over in his hand and something about his mannerisms cause her to panic.

She watches as Reuben and Jason stare at each other. Then he's next to her rubbing his cheek on hers, his arms resting over her shoulder, as he puts the drink he poured for her on the desk in front of her before massaging her shoulders.

She takes a breath she knows what he's doing, and she can hear Jason sigh in response. His temper is building as he watches him touch her.

"Hey asshole, leave her alone … are you listening I'm talking to you"

Reuben ignores him completely as he brushes his lips against her ear. Then he whispers aggressively "You will do it! That noise, I know what you hope it was but let me assure you, no one is coming to save you. You want to save him, then just open.. the file!"

He wraps his arms around her shoulders then wipes the lemon juice from the knife blade with the napkin, in front of her face. She closes her eyes to him, nervous, she tries not to think of the knife in his hand. He can sense her tension and smiles

Then as she opens her eyes, he's gone, gone from her side and just for a moment she relaxes but as Jason lets out cry of pain she looks around behind her. Reuben has stabbed him in the leg with the small knife

"JESUS! REUBEN STOP!" she screams out "Oh my god, please. Reuben please stop!"  
her breathing become rapid as her brain tries to process what he's done "For god sake! What the hell was that for" now she does cry, sobbing hard "Oh my God!" she screams as she can see the blood pouring from Jason's leg. His face contorted by pain; his hand covered in the red stickiness where he holds it over the wound

"Now..."Reuben laughs " I thought that might focus your attention" he's angry "If you don't want him to suffer more, then get that damn file open, right now!"

She's shaking, her adrenaline kicks in. She's so angry as she looks at Jason holding his leg.

Then her anger drives her and she lunges forward from the chair at Reuben, as she does she pulls out the letter opener and screaming "You son of a BITCH!" she uses her full fury to stab him hard in the side of the neck with it.

In reaction, to her sudden attack his arms fling wildly to defend himself and as he does he catches her, knocking her backwards to the floor. She's alright but slightly winded. As she sits there catching her breath she watches as he sinks to his knees on the floor. He has his hand on the knife, sticking out of his neck. His eyes wide open as he gags on the blood in his throat.

Then the room suddenly falls silent.

All she can hear is her own heavy breathing. She wipes her nose on the back of her hand its shaking like crazy and she sits back on her heels, staring at Reuben's body in front of her.

She swallows as she sits watching, part of her expecting a reaction from him but none comes. Taking a deep breath, she moves as a mild panic ensues and she scrambles across the floor to him Jason, helping to tend his wound. Ripping at his pants where the knife went in. Undoing his belt. Pulling it quickly through the loops. She pushes him back, making him lay down.

He closes his eyes grimacing through the pain "Jason it's okay, I'm gonna sort it." She puts her hand on his face, stroking his cheek "C'mon help me"

She wraps his belt around his leg pulling it tight. Making it into a tourniquet to stop the bleeding. "Hold that!" she gives him the end of the belt to hold while she looks around for something to use on the bleed. She runs to the bathroom and finds some towels. Holding one of them against the wound, mopping up the blood. "You okay?" she frowns staring at him "Jason talk to me, are you okay?"

"Yeah" he nods "Yeah, 'll be okay" he grimaces as he tries to move his leg "We need to get out of here"

"Alright, just give me a minute we need to fix something against this wound" she pads it out with towel and tears some strips to tie it in place then she picks up the knife Reuben used on his leg and cuts the tape from around his hands. "Can you stand on it?"

He nods and she helps him up. It's a struggle and he's limping badly. His weight leaned against her shoulders is heavy "C'mon" she looks to the window checking for Reagan and the other guys are "We'll go out the back " she points through the kitchen to the back door,

Once outside, there's a small area of dirt covered ground. They need to cross it to get to the cover of the trees. She struggles to take his weight, they're both in pain and she its hard works for her to carry him across the piece of ground but she continues her fear that Reagan will see them, before they make cover.

They keep going, not fast but considering the injuries they have it's what they can manage They must have walked for about fifteen minutes before she drops him to the ground and sits down. It's all she can manage.

"I need to stop" her breathing is labored as she lifts Jason's arm from around her neck _"Pheww!... Sorry!_ " she lets out a sigh a relief to have his weight off her shoulders. They're in a small clearing and they can see some of the sky through the trees.

Sitting there she's exhausted. "Let me look" the wound is still bleeding but not quite as much.  
She keeps the belt around, forcing pressure on the towel which she refolds to make it clean  
Her hands covered in his blood "Oh my God! Shit"

It's taking all her energy to sort him out and she's shaking from adrenaline He puts his hand on her face and she nuzzles against his touch. "CJ just relax we're safe now"

Closing her eyes "I wish this was over. I wish were back at the house, in a warm bed" she smiles. She's so tired, exhausted she gives a long sigh, leaning her head on his shoulder

"Hey c'mon " He grimaces any slight movement causing a pain to shoot his leg.

"I can't believe he did that, I'm so sorry"

"It's okay, look we got this" he tries to reassure her.

"Now what?" she looks at their surroundings. She has no idea where they are in relation to anything. They have no phones or equipment and it's getting dark. They'll never be able to cover this terrain with Jason's leg in the dark. "What the _fuck_ are we going to do?"

"Hey, c'mon, we'll be okay. Just stay calm" Jason rubs her neck trying to comfort her. He can see she's struggling " _Shh!_ Hey where's the real CJ, she can cope with this, right?"

She nods the stress has got to her and she knows it "It's getting dark, we're not going to be able to go further, not with your leg like that"

"No, you're right, we're gonna have to wait it out here, walk out at first light"

She could do with the rest anyway. Leaning back against him, she starts to shiver with cold. Only wearing the tee shirt, that she put on first thing this morning.

"You cold" he rubs at her arm

"Yeah a bit" She nods "No, actually I'm really cold!"

"Come here" she cuddles in beside him and he rubs at her bare arms to get the circulation going and warm her up "You are cold. CJ are you okay?"

"I'll be fine" she snuggles against him and he wraps his arms round her. She grimaces at the wound as her stomach is aching more "Oh, shit!" she holds it putting pressure on it trying to alleviate the soreness and the ache

"Here,let me look" she looks away trying to grit her teeth to the pain as he looks, he frowns at it "That's not looking good, it's really red, really sore. You need to get it sorted when we get back"

"It'll be fine" she swallows hard " the pain will pass" He puts his hand on it and she presses on his hand with hers. That slight pressure takes the ache away. As the pain subsides she closes her eyes and drops her hand from his.

His hand smooths across her stomach. The moment gives her a warm feeling which is a relief as they lay silent in the cold darkness. She swallows nervously as he feels him run his hand across her skin gently and tenderly massaging her stomach.

There's an air of tension as he shifts position to aid the ache in his leg and then after a few moments silence he finally speaks "CJ, I have to ask, did you.." he gently circles his fingers on her stomach knowing this isn't exactly the right place, but he goes for it " did you do that test?"

She takes a deep breath, biting her lip then nods "Yeah I did!"

She sits up and resting her elbow on her knee she rubs her forehead with her fingers staring at him its hard to get her words out "Look I'm sorry… it's not gonna be your problem. Jason, I'll take care of it when we get back. Really...I'll sort it " She's embarrassed to look at him. She shakes her head. "I can't believe this got so out of control. I'm so sorry"

"Hey!" he pulls her chin round to look at her "Of course this is my problem. I was part of this too"

"I should have been more careful... especially after what happened before. I should have known better" she shakes her head a big tear runs down her cheek she wipes it with the back of her hand

"Hey, we both should have okay. This is not your fault, I should have been more responsible" He holds her cheek "Anyway, who says it has to be a problem?"

"What?" She looks at him confused "Jason what are you saying?"

"I'm saying …" he pauses "would it be so bad, to have another baby? "

"Are you serious? What, you mean you wanna keep this baby?" she frowns staring at him. She has to admit the immediate thought scares her.

"Yeah.." he nods "maybe I think I am" he smiles as he brushes her hair off her face as she continues to frown.

Studying his face in the dim light she frowns "You're really serious aren't you"

"It's not so ridiculous is it? I mean we can do _us,_ be a couple, right?"

"I don't know" she shrugs "maybe? Ive not given any thought. I mean serious _and_ us don't exactly go together"

He laughs out loud

"What you are laughing at?" she frowns

"I don't know ….." he grimaces at the pain in his leg " I just, can't believe we're here in the dark, and cold talking about being normal" he laughs, pulling her closer. He kisses the top of her head and she looks up to him her big blue eyes, he can see in the light from the moon, gazing into his He smiles at her staring at him and leans forward, giving her a long tender kiss. She smiles, and then her body shivers again "Come here, you're freezing!"

As he pulls her close she closes her eyes, leaning against him. For the first time in ages she feels secure safe as she sits wrapped in his arms.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She must have fallen asleep, as she opens her eyes Jason's trying to sit up S _hhh!_ _He puts his fingers to his lips_

"What is it?!" she whispers. She can feel his tension and puts her on edge

"Stay quiet!" They both sit and listen to the silence and then they hear the rustle in the trees followed by another.

She holds her breath then whispers, "Who is it?"

"Not sure " He shakes his head.

They sit very still and very quiet. Then they hear the radio mic call and the heavy Texan accent "Bravo 2, this is Bravo 3, I've found them"

"Sonny!" They both let out a massive sigh. She smiles as the relief at seeing Sonny standing there washes over her.

"You two good?"

"What kept you?" Jason smiles"

"Yeah we had few problems to take care of first Boss!" He smiles "Blame Ray, he was in charge. Oh and looks like you two took care of one by yourself. Who's handy work with the knife back at the cabin"

Trent arrives he's not far behind in the trees. He sees the wound on Jason's leg "Alright, let's get a look at you" he starts to unpack his medical kit, cutting at the fabric on Jason's pants so he can see the wound better

"How is it?" Jason grimaces in pain

"Should be okay. Doesn't look like it hit anything major. Bleeding's stemmed, though we'll need to get your blood levels checked and some fluids up." He frowns as he lifts the towel dressing CJ put on it temporarily "let's get it cleaned up ...take it from there"

Ray's now caught them up. "Brock's still checking the area with Cerb" He notices CJs shivering, it might be cold, or it might be shock but Ray takes his jacket off, wrapping it around her shoulders.

She's shaking quite violently now, and Trent looks her over "Are you alright?"

At first she nods and then slowly she shakes her head "You know what, actually I don't feel so great. But don't worry, I'll be okay!"

"Trent, take a look at her. Check she's okay. That wound wasn't looking great earlier"

"I'm okay, your leg needs attention first"

Suddenly the color drains from her face, she's still shaking. Trent's concerned "Let me just take a quick look, just be sure" She leans back as he looks "Hmm!...Jason's right, that's not looking good. Looks like and infection setting in. We need to get you, both, back to a hospital, asap"

"What about Reagan, you get him?" Jason looks at Ray

Ray shakes his head "No. No that slippery snake got away" he frowns "We'll find him though. Brock's now out looking with the dog."

"Oh, shit!" CJ frowns

"It's okay, we'll get him" Ray reassures her "Hey, let's get you two back to the cabin first, get some transport outta here"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They make whats a very slow walk back. C.J walks behind Ray who leads. Jason's being carried between Sonny and Trent. Brock and Cerberus securing the rear. They've picked nothing up with regards to Reagan's location.

They arrive back at the cabin, the warmth inside is welcome. Reuben's body still lays on the floor where he fell and CJ stands, staring at what she did.

Sonny pulls the large fabric throw from the couch and uses it to cover the body "Don't wanna be looking at that piece of trash!" He glances at CJ watching her still fixed on the body "Hey c'mon, you need to snap out of it. He's not the first person you've offed"

"I'm fine...just tired"

"Okay we'll get back" Jason still takes control "Sonny you drive C.J back in the jeep. The rest of us can go back in the van. That way…" he grimaces " I can lay flat with my leg"

"Good idea" Trent agrees "And I can get you a line of fluid up as well."

"Sure, thing Boss" Sonny nods. Not that he ever wants to spend time with C.J but under the circumstances he'll do it.

"You okay with that?" Jason frowns at her but she's miles away still staring at the body on the floor . "Hey….hey, CJ are you alright? You know what Trent; she doesn't look too well"

"Um…sure whatever" she looks at Sonny. She'd rather be with Jason than Sonny, but she knows Trent needs to sort his leg "I'm good, don't worry about me"

"C'mon I wanna get you back. Get you checked out make sure _everything's_ okay " he smiles, and she nods she knows what he means

She smiles. Finally, the might be something good, something to look forward to. She closes her eyes as he kisses her head. "I need the bathroom before we head back"

Ray goes through with her to check everything is secure. They don't want any more surprises

As she follows Ray through she stops by the desk "Where's the laptop?" she frowns

"Laptop?" Ray looks confused

"Reagan…he's been back here. Reuben's laptop is gone. It was here on the desk"

"You stay here!" Ray makes her wait while weapons raised he and Sonny check the other rooms "Brock, see if the dog can pick up a scent. Reagan's been here"

Nothing surfaces but the vehicle that was here when her and Jason first arrived, Reuben's vehicle, has also gone.

"Shit the Son of a bitch, he got away" Ray shakes his head


	49. Chapter 49

**Chapter 49: A job offer.**

**Virginia Naval Base.**

Jason's rushed to medical and taken straight for surgery to assess the damage on his leg. Everyone else exhausted and tired, crashes out on various places they can find around the office.

Trent went to the hospital with Jason and CJ, he couldn't settle, wanting to keep an eye on their treatment, especially CJ. Jason had given him orders to look after her and so there was no way this time he was disobeying that.

She's laid in the bed, her arm hooked to an IV line, it's been like that for the past hour to try and counter the infection that started to set in on her wound. She's beginning to feel better, responding to the large dose of antibiotics, having been very unwell when she first arrived.

It's quiet in the side room and laid there, nothing to do, she's been drifting in and out of sleep. She's impatient, wanting to get out and go and see Jason but she can't. She can't go anywhere right now as she's waiting to be taken for a scan.

"Hey!" Clay's head appears around the doorway to her room. He smiles "You okay?"

"Hey, you" She nods, not realizing quite how happy she would be to see him "Are you supposed to be up on your feet yet, I thought you should be resting"

"I couldn't rest, not after Blackburn told me what was going on. But I'm feeling pretty good now. Things are getting better, just a bit sore and tender here and there, but I'm gonna be fine. They said they might let me out tomorrow. I'm gonna go stay with Sonny for a while until I'm okay to be on my own."

"Sounds a good idea. Glad you're on the mend so quick, nothing worse than being stuck in here" she smiles "So, have you been and seen Jason. Is he out of surgery? They won't let me go anywhere and they can't tell me much"

"Yeah, I saw him. He was asleep but he's doing okay. He had some surgery. Trent & Ray are with him now, I'm not sure where Sonny went but I figured I'd come see how you're doin"

"Thanks " She nods "I'm gonna go down and see him when they've run this second IV through, they need to do a few checks first. Then they said I should be able to leave"

"Alright! You want me to wait with you, keep you company?"

"No!" She shakes her head "No, I'm good thanks, I'll probably get some sleep while I wait. It's been a tough day"

"But you're okay, there's nothing serious going on?" he frowns, from the expression on her face he just has this feeling that she's keeping something back from him.

"No, nothing serious" she shakes her head "just an infection. They're hoping this antibiotic IV should clear it up"

The Doctor is at that door "Oh um.. excuse me. Sorry to in interrupt. Ms Lewis, the nurse will bring you down once that IV is done"

"Okay, thanks" she smiles as he disappears

"Take you where?" Clay frowns "CJ is everything alright. You would tell me if it wasn't"

"Oh yeah, I'm fine. They just want to check, you know that there's no internal damage. Just precautionary"

He frowns again watching her, now he definitely feels there's something she's keeping from him "You want me to come with you, hold your hand" he laughs

"No, no I'm fine. Just tired. You go back. I'll come see you when I'm done."

"Okay I'll get off " he smiles, turning to look at her from the doorway

"Clay…." She calls him back, hesitating as she watches him looking at her. Biting her lip for a moment "Oh it's nothing…just thanks, for coming to see me." As he leaves she takes a deep breath, leaning back into her pillows _Oh shit!_ She sighs closing her eyes

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Trent, Ray, Sonny and Clay are sat around the side of Jason's bed. He's awake and talking but his arms are filled with blood and antibiotic drip lines.

C.J's finished her scan and she gets the nurse to push her in the wheelchair to his room. She smiles watching them all messing around, joking with each other. She hesitates, thinking of leaving them to it , when Jason spots her sitting there in the doorway.

"Hey, you!" he smiles. Everyone turns to look at her "How'd you get on. Is everything okay?"

"Yeah!" She nods, nervously biting her lip "Yeah, I'm good" a tear of tiredness rolls down her cheek and she quickly wipes it away "I'm just tired. You good, I mean the surgery went okay?"

"Yeah I'm good. Groggy from the painkillers and the leg's sore but they say it'll be okay, no permanent damage"

"Good!" She nods "I'm glad. Look, I'm just gonna get a coffee, I'll come back a little later"

"CJ … "he calls after her but it's too late she's gone. he sighs "Trent, do me a favor, go check on her, see she's alright" he nods towards the door "Then if they say she can go, will you take her home. She looks exhausted. She needs to rest, but you know what she's like, she won't give in"

"Yeah sure" Trent nods "I'll go now, look unless you need me, I'll check in with you tomorrow"

Clay watches Trent leave he looks at Sonny and Ray wondering why Jason's fussing so much. "Everything alright with her. You seem overly concerned. I got there impression earlier there was something more going on"

"No, no everything's fine. She's just tired like I said"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She rubs her neck releasing the tension while she's waits for the machine to produce her coffee.

Trent's behind her in the corridor "CJ, are you okay?"

"Yeah I said I'm fine. Why are you following me"

"Jason wanted me to check if everything's alright. He said you looked tired, he's right. Did they say you can go home yet?"

"If everything's fine, they're just waiting on some blood results then they said I can go"

"Good, and the scan,was everything okay with that?

She bites her lip she just stares at the machine, lifting her coffee from the stand "You know I asked you not to say anything about that" she takes a breath, not even looking at him "it wasn't your place Trent"

"Yeah I know but …but I just thought it was best, for you both, that he should know. I did it for the best reasons. I didn't want you to have something else to deal with on your own. You need help. You can't get through this alone"

"And who made you god! " she sighs shaking her head. She's still angry with him "I told you I'd tell him, when I was ready" now she turns to look at him "You know what Trent I don't appreciate being cornered like that. You forced my hand on something you have no idea about. And now I have decision to make that maybe I don't want. But you didn't think about that before you opened your mouth did you." She scratches her head, shaking it in frustration then she lets out a long sigh "Is his leg gonna be alright?"

"Um….yeah. Yeah, there wasn't too much muscle damage, but it is gonna take time to heal, for it to get strong again. He's gonna be out of action for a while"

 _Shit!_ "He's gonna love that!" she laughs "He'll be a nightmare"

Trent watches her pacing around drinking her coffee, then she throws the cup in the trash and sits down. Putting her head in her hands, she feels so tired.

"CJ, are you really alright?"

"Honestly? "She shakes her head "No! "

"So tell me what's wrong?"

"I don't know. I just …" she sighs again "… I just... I really want a drink." She laughs "You know that feeling, that want. It's driving me crazy!"

"That's what you're struggling, with that?" he frowns

"Yeah…yeah I have to admit I am" she nods "Oh and please, don't go telling Jason cos he doesn't need this right now. I'll find a way to deal with it okay. I know I have to stop drinking…especially now but I have to deal with it my way"

"Okay, but I want you to know,I'm here. So just, talk to me."

"Oh Trent..." She shakes her head "It's just there all the time, you know. That feeling and the minute there's any pressure then … I just can't get the thought of having a drink out of my head."

"Alright, well I'll help you. We'll talk to someone, get you some help. CJ you've admitted you have a problem that's a start"

"Talk! What really? Yeah cos talking that solves everything, doesn't it." she sighs, standing up from the wheelchair, she looks him in the eye "I need to get out of here!"

"Look, let's check with the doctor and then I'll take you home" Trent sighs as he follows her down the corridor.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

 **3 months later **

She's stopped being sick and after washing her face, she brushes her teeth. Standing in front of the mirror, running her hand through her straggly hair, looking at herself.

She sighs looking at the reflection of her body, standing there in her crop lace bra with matching panties. She was getting undressed ready to have a shower _Oh god! You look like shit!_

She sighs, again looking at herself. Her fingers touch gently along the line of her scar. It doesn't hurt but occasionally it aches when she touches it. It's healed really well but to her it's still really noticeable.

Jason puts his head around the bathroom door "Hey, you okay? You're not still being sick, are you?"

"No, no I'm fine now" she reluctantly smiles

"Look, I'm gonna drop Mikey at school, you want me to drop J.C at the nursery" He looks at his watch "I have time before I head to this medical"

"Um…yeah that would be great" she smiles. She doesn't say it but she's really not in the mood for doing that today and wasn't actually going take him anyway.

"I'll be back in time for our appointment, this afternoon" he smiles "1400 right?"

"Yeah" She nods. She's not really listening, still staring at her scar

"CJ, you sure you're okay? You seem really distant today" he enters the bathroom and stands behind her. He can see her looking at herself and can tell by her face she's not happy. He continues watching her in the mirror as he wraps his arms around her waist. "Does that still hurt?" he frowns, as he places his hand gently over her scar

"No!" she shakes her head "Just looking. It's so noticeable, do you ever think it will go down"

"Hey it's fine. Yes, you can see it but… hazard of the job CJ you know that. Look how many scars I have right. You're beautiful" he kisses her neck, taking in her scent, his eyes watching her reflection. He gently smooths his hands over her stomach cupping them around her slightly swollen belly. He smiles

"What?" She frowns "Jason, what are you smiling at?"

"Nothing. I'm just happy. I'm happy you can see, our baby now"

"Don't say that!" she frowns worriedly looking at her stomach in the mirror. She's been doing everything to keep it quiet, to hide it but now she realizes he's right. You can see the curve of her stomach is starting to show. She already knows her pants won't do up properly "Just make me feel more shit than I already do, why don't you" she sighs. Turning sideways to check her profile. "Oh god! You're right it is starting to show. You know I'm not gonna be able to hide it much longer"

"Hey!..." He pushes her hair over to the side and kisses her neck again "You look great!"

"No, I look big, I look fat!" she sighs as he carries on kissing her, moving his lips across her shoulders "Jason .. stop!"

He runs his hand over her stomach again and then up to her breast, gently squeezing at them."You look, and _feel_ great" he smiles

"Jason.. c'mon, stop. I need to have a shower" she brushes him off "And you've got an appointment with the medical officer to get to " She turns away from the mirror and puts her arms round his neck "So… you think they'll sign you off. Say you're fit for work today?"

"I sure hope so. I'm not sure how I'll react if they don't"

"So, I guess I'm gonna find out what it's like being the girlfriend of a SEAL now" she laughs

"Hey, you're okay with this. Me going back" he frowns "Just you don't sound happy"

"Yeah of course. Look, I have to be" she shrugs " I know there's only so many classes you can teach. Even if it's nice having you here. I know you can't do that for the rest of your life, well not while there's a chance you can operate. I know you'd hate it!"

She reaches up and kisses him. Her tongue finding his. Then he moves his lips, kissing down her neck, on to her chest, across her breasts, then following a line on to her stomach

 _Mmmm!_ She groans, enjoying the touch of his mouth on her skin "Jason….. stop" she smiles running her fingers through his hair.

He smiles as he surfaces, brushing her hair away from her face "So I um …I know we said we wouldn't say anything _yet_ but as we're having the scan today, I was thinking we might come clean after, tell everyone about the baby."

"Oh Jason..." She shakes her head "look can't we just leave it a while" she looks him in his eyes "Keep it to ourselves, at least until we _have_ to say something"

"What about I just tell the guys. I mean, they're gonna guess soon anyways" he kisses around her neck and starts to slide his hand inside the lace edging of her panties.

"NO!" she stops his hand "Look you're not getting around me like that" she laughs "Now go, take Mikey & JC. and then call me, let me know how your appointment goes. Oh, and hey.. . don't go getting spun up before this afternoon" she smiles

He kisses her lips one more time "I won't. What about if I tell just a few people, say Ray and..."

"NO!" she smiles throwing a towel at him "Now go!

"Oh um…so how about when I come back, we catch up where we left off here?"

"Yeah …" She nods, biting her lip teasingly "yeah, that you can do!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Having showered she's nearly dressed. Pulling her jeans on. She finds she can get the zip up, but the button won't fasten. She closes her eyes and breaths in, but it's no good it won't go _Shit!_ She pulls her shirt out and covers it over the gaping waistband as she heads into the kitchen.

Placing the milk carton back in the fridge she notices the six beers sitting there. Her eyes focused on them and she doesn't move. Just standing there looking, anxiously biting the inside of her cheek. She sighs and then slowly closes the fridge door. She leans back against the cool metal, thinking.

 _Oh, fuck it!_ She opens the fridge up and takes the top off one of the beers. Closing her eyes her head a messy mix of arguments with herself. Then suddenly she does it she tips the bottle against her lips and sips the cold liquid. _Oh god that tastes good!_

She has to admit even though she cut back, this is not the first drink she's had in the past three months. Counseling has helped but it hadn't stopped her entirely even though Jason thinks it has .

She leans her head back on the fridge as she drinks the rest. Then hearing a noise in the living room she stops. standing still, listening

 _Shit!_ Quickly she wipes her mouth and looks at her watch _can't be Jason back already?_ She quickly takes one more swig from the bottle before she drops it into the trash can. Wiping her mouth then swishing it out with a glass of water . "

Jason…that you?" She calls out, listening "Jason…." She frowns perhaps she was too hasty getting rid of the beer. She wanders through to check on the noise as she does she stops in her tracks "Shit!" she lets out a shocked sigh "Oh my god... _WADE!?_ What the hell! Oh god, you gave me a fright. What the hell are you doing here?" she takes a moment to collect her thoughts. This is the last person she ever expected to see "Do you have a habit of entering without knocking?"

"Sorry, I did knock. You must have not heard me"

She frowns doubting it, but she was focused on the beer so perhaps " I don't know what you want but you need to go, Jason will be back soon"

"No, I don't think he will. He has the children to drops off and his medical to attend. Oh and …" he looks at his watch " a briefing scheduled in a couple of hours; I think you'll find!"

She frowns "What the hell do you want?"

"Well, with Reuben's unfortunate _accident_ … it would seem I have had to pick up the mess" he smiles "plus…." He lays some paperwork on the table "..if anyone asks I have some paperwork in regard to your father's Washington house, you need to sign"

"What did you really come for?" she looks puzzled as she stares at him "If you've come for what I think, then you should know I don't have _it_ anymore. You need to find Reagan, not me. I guess you already know that though"

"Catherine …" he sighs "you are your father's daughter." He smiles tipping his head to one side to look at her "Come, I know you're not stupid. I know you will have made a copy."

"No!" She shakes her head "No copy, not this time"

"Oh, come on Catherine, we both know that file was your only protection. If father taught you anything it would be to have a backup plan" he smiles at her "Why don't you make us a coffee and we'll talk"

"Wade I don't want to talk to you. I've got nothing to say. You need to go" she leads the way to the door and opens it, but he doesn't move, just stands there staring at her.

"Come back ...to Washington!"

"What?" She frowns and then laughs

"I need to replace Reuben"

"NO!... besides, even if I wanted to, I have too much here now"

"What this?" he points round the house "being the wife of a Navy SEAL?" He laughs "That's not you"

"What do know, you don't know me"

"No, maybe not now so much, but I did and…." He pauses "I knew your father well enough and I know how he struggled to control you. How you tested his patience but maybe it's that spark, that fiery personality, I need " he smiles

"No!" She shakes her head "Just go away and leave me alone. I've got the chance of a life here now, without all that. I already told Reuben this. Go find Reagan, get your file and play your games"

"I've sent your fathers money to an account, for you"

"What?" she screws up her face "I don't want any money"

"It was owed, to your father. It was for final contracts he signed, before he was killed it's a substantial amount $300 000"

"It's nothing to do with me, I don't want it."

"Maybe, maybe not but it's there for you"

"I don't want anything linking me to that, do you understand… nothing!"

"But you are linked, already"

"Just go away and leave me out of this"

In the kitchen, she fills the coffee machine, switching it on. She takes a deep breath in "So just say I did have a _copy_ then what?" she turns to look at him "You'd keep me out of it. Could you find Reagan, make him go away, forever. I would need to know that Jason, the children and um...Clay, Clay Spenser. I need them kept safe; you can do that Wade? I need to know no one else will ever come here again. Can you guarantee that"

"Maybe? If that's really what you want" he looks at her and smiles "Do you know what Reuben's down fall was?" He smiles "It was you. He fell in love with you."

"What?!" she laughs "Reuben wasn't in love with me. He wanted to control me." She frowns "You don't hurt people the way he did, if you love them"

"No, he did. He really was in love with you. He was stupid and he got blindsided by it"

"Wade, why have you come here now, I mean it's weeks since Reuben's death?"

"I told you. I've been cleaning up his mess. It's taken longer than we anticipated because…" he coughs awkwardly " because we can't find Reagan. He's gone to ground"

"You can't find him" she swallows nervously This concerns her and she sighs biting her lip anxiously "Well if you can't find him then he's either dead or someone with serious connections is hiding him" _Shit!_

Worried she checks the time on the clock "Look Jason will be back soon. You need to be gone before he gets here. I can't be explaining this, not now" she sighs rubbing her head

"Catherine tell me you'll think about it, about coming back to Washington. Tell me you're tempted"

"No!" She shakes her head, staring at him "I can't, not now and anyway I don't want to. I'm done with that life."

"Fine" He smiles and sighs "If that's what you want to tell yourself. I'll leave my number. You can call me, if you change your mind"

"Hey!"

 _Oh Shit!_ "It's Jason. Wade, you need to go!"

"Just stay calm. Everything will be fine."

"No just go!" she opens the back door "Wade go!" Wade doesn't move and casually continues to drink his coffee, "Jesus…will you just go!"

Too late, Jason's at the kitchen doorway and he smiles anxiously "What's going on?" he frowns, looking up and down at this exceptionally tall guy, someone he doesn't recognize, standing in his kitchen drinking coffee.

"You're back" She coughs nervously "that was quick?"

"Yeah.. the one before me cancelled so I um… I figured I might come back, while we had some time alone, pick up where we left off this morning" he smiles "Who's this?"

"How did it go?" she asks, avoiding his question

"Yeah good, they signed me fit for duty, as of now"

"That's great!" she smiles "So you're operational again" she trying to keep him away from any awkward questions

"Yeah with immediate effect " he's still frowning, puzzled "So, you gonna introduce me"

"Um… yeah this is um…." She closes her eyes, stalling but before she can answer Wade steps forward.

With his hand out he introduces himself "Hello, Matthew Wade, I'm um…was, a friend, and colleague, of Catherine's father, Admiral Lewis. I'm here on business, right now and as I hadn't seen Catherine since the funeral, I thought I'd drop by, say hello"

CJ looks worried as she sees Jason frowning. He's concerned after everything another stranger appears in their lives, just when he thought everything was settling down. "Yeah um…Jason, Jason Hayes" He puts his hand out to greet Wade

"Yes…yes, I know of you" He smile "Her father talked of you before"

"Well can't have been good …" he smiles " not if it came from the Admiral"

Wade laughs "You know the Admiral, I don't think you were ever going to be his favourite person" he smiles, then helooks at his watch "Oh my, is that the time, well I best make tracks. We'll catch up again, before I leave"

"Yeah sure" She nods "It's been good to see you" she looks at Jason. He still looks really concerned as Wade kisses her cheek and says his goodbyes. She takes a deep breath; she can feel Jason staring at her

"So... it went well " she smiles changing the subject

"So who the hell is he?"

"Wade? Like, he said, just a friend of my fathers"

"So, what's he really want?"

"He brought some paperwork, for the house in Washington. I need to sort it out. I forget all about it. I haven't been there since…. I left him to deal with it. I probably should have sorted it sooner, but it's been so long I didn't give it any thought while it was being rented I didn't think to bother, but the tenants are coming out and so I need to make up my mind what to do with it"

"Never heard you mention him before"

"Haven't I? Oh um… guess with everything, it just wasn't priority. I probably need to get it sold, if I'm not going back there, the house I mean."

Something disturbs Jason's about the way she's acting. She seems cagey, nervous and more anxious than she has been in weeks "CJ, what did he really want?"

She takes a long breath "You really want to know? Fine, he um... offered me a job, but it's in Washington. I said no"

"What?! A job, a job doing what? "

"Just… " she sighs " kinda special operations task force. I'm not gonna take it. I'm through with Washington."

"Seriously, were you considering it ?"

"No!... "she thinks for a minute "No of course not. I've left that life behind. You and the kids that's it now. It's all I need. Besides I have a baby on the way. I can't, it's too..."

"Too what? Too dangerous?" He frowns "And that's all he doing here, offering a job? Nothing to do with that other business"

"No, I told you…" she's getting annoyed at the questions now "He came like he said about the house and the job. Look, Jason forget all that" she kisses him "Jason, look at me. Tell me what they said about your medical. Did that say your leg is good?"

"Yeah.. Yeah all good. No permanent damage. Maybe a few tweaks now and again but I'm set to go!" Jason phone bleeps "Shit.. I guess I shouldn't have told Blackburn I was ready to go ASAP . I have to go back for a briefing"

"Okay…" she nods "You think you're gonna make it to the appointment this afternoon"

"Yeah of course… I promise" he puts his hand around her neck and pulls her forward as he kisses her gently "Us. me and you, it's gonna be enough for you, yeah?"

"Yeah…yeah of course" She smiles as she puts her hand on his cheek "You and me, that's all I want" she leans up and kisses him

"So, in that case then …" He puts his hand on her stomach "we can we tell everyone, after the scan today"

"Jason…"She shakes her head "let's just see if everything's alright first, take it from there. I don't know why we have to share it with everyone else so soon. I'd rather it be our secret to enjoy for a while. Why complicate it telling other people"

"Look, we'll talk about this after the scan, but I really don't see the reason not to tell the guys. " he looks at his watch "I have to go"

"Okay, shall I meet you there?"

"Yeah" He kisses, his hand stroking her waist, feeling its way down over the curve of her butt. _Mmmm!_ "such a shame, I was looking forward to …you know "

She smiles, biting her lip teasingly "How long you got before this briefing?"

"Um… I gotta be there in about forty minutes"

"Forty minutes, well then why are we wasting time talking " she smiles "I thought you wanted to finish off what we started this morning"

He smiles, grabbing her around the waist and starts kissing her neck. Grappling at the hem of her shirt, he pulls it up over her head, dropping it on the kitchen floor. Needily pushing her back against the worktop.  
 _Mmmm!_ She sighs as his mouth finds her breast; she closes her eyes. He undoes the zipper on her jeans, working his hand into the top of her panties searching out her clit _"Oh god!_ she groans breathless as he touches her _"that's definitely where we left off"_

 _His fingers work there way inside her and now she wants him, she can't unbuckle his belt fast enough then he lifts her up sitting her on the kitchen countertop, sliding her black panties down her legs and throwing them behinds him, then he pulls at his Khakis pants to his knees. Pulling her to the edge of the counter he thrusts himself inside her. Time conscious he fucks hard and fast. There's no time for lots of touching or intimacy, this is purely a need satisfying fuck._

 _Aahhhhh !_ she cries out, as he pounds against with all his strength. Her fingers tangled in his hair, legs locked around his waist. He clamps his mouth her breast, kissing and sucking at it hard, it leaves her gasping for air. Then as she cums, he can feel the intense wave of her muscles relax and she groans long and loud _Ohhhhh fuckkk!_ Her pleasure satisfied she can see him smile and then she feels the warmth as he cums deep inside her.

 _Ahhhhh!_ he gasps, his tension relieved _Shit!_ He laughs "That's definitely where we left off."

 _Pheww!_ She leans back on her elbows, sitting up on the worktop, she pulls her hand through her hair. He kisses her and then lifts her down. Her arms snaked around his neck, holding her naked skin against his

"Well that was quick" she smiles

"Sorry." He sighs, pulling his pants up and fastening his belt " Sorry, I told you I gotta get to this briefing" he kisses her again "I'll make it up to you later, promise"

 _"Hmmm!"_ she frowns "I think I preferred when you were injured, you had a lot more time on your hands then" she smiles

"Hey, I never heard you complaining just then" he kisses her again, his mouth again finding her breast, sucking at her sensitive nipple as he bites it gently.

 _Mmmm!_ She groans "OhI'm not complaining" she bites her lip teasingly, enjoying what he's doing she holds her hand on the back his head. He subtly checks the time on his watch.

"Look, sorry I've gotta go "

"Fine" She nods, picking her tee shirt up from the floor "I'll see you at the appointment?"

"Yeah, I'll give you a call when I leave the base"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason's sat in the briefing but he's fidgeting uneasily in his seat. Looking at his watch, the times moving on and Blackburn seems to have been droning endlessly.

"Okay …" Jason sighs he's finally had enough " When we get the rest of the intel then we can go over this again. So, let's just wrap it up for today. I mean it's not like we're getting spun up right now, yeah?"

Mandy frowns she can see how unusually distracted he is "Well we're hoping all the intel will be in place by the time we are on route"

Blackburn frowns he can see what ever it is that Jason wants to get to must be important as he's virtually hovering at the door before he finishes "Gentlemen, stay prepared, we have a forty-eight-hour window for the call to go. So clear your diaries"

"Shit!" Jason sighs wishing maybe they hadn't sign him off today "Ray!" Jason calls him to one side "listen Blackburn wants to give me a pre-flight briefing in the next couple hours if I'm not back can you cover me. I gotta be somewhere"

"Okay sure. Anything I need to know?" Ray frowns Jason's never had him cover team leader briefing before, well not for a mission Jason's going on

"I just got an appointment I can't miss it"

"Sounds worrying. You okay brother." He frowns " The kids okay, Mikey, JC they're alright, yeah?"

"Yeah. Yeah they're fine"

"Then what the hell is it man. Look, I got no problem covering you, it's just not something you've not asked before, so must be pretty serious, right? Something with CJ"

"Look…" Jason coughs and turns his back on the rest of the room. He licks his lips nervously and folds his arms "this…this has to stay between me and you, for now" he looks around, checking no ones listening "You can't say a word, cos I promised her"

"Jason man you're worrying me now" Ray frowns apprehensively "What is it?"

"It is CJ, but um... it's not bad news, its…well, we have a scan today"

"A scan?" Rays eyes widen, as he stares thinking "What scan? Oh my ….are you saying she's pregnant? Oh man, how the hell did that happen?"

Jason frowns at him "Ray I think we both know how that happens"

"Yeah I know that's not what I meant! I mean… oh man" he rubs his head in disbelief "So,how far gone is she? I mean, when's the baby due"

"I think shes; about fourteen weeks. We got a scan, in the next hour"

"Oh man… you're okay about this?" he gasps as Jason nods " Well congratulations?" Ray's certainly shocked. It wasn't something he was expecting to hear.

"Yeah, but its good, right? " Jason smiles nervously "Tell me it's a good thing Ray"

"Yeah, I mean…yeah, a baby's always a good thing, a gift, a blessing. If that's what you both want? Jason are you sure about this, you and her" Ray looks him in the eyes and Jason looks away

"Yeah of course Why wouldn't I be, it's normal, right? What normal people do"

"Look don't take this the wrong way man, but this is CJ, so be careful"

"What're you trying to say Ray?" Jason's slightly annoyed at his comments

"Look, I don't wanna put a dampener or it but c'mon man when does CJ ever do normal? Complicated yes, normal… not so much"

"She's getting better Ray, she cleaned her act up. She's been attending her meetings, she's got the drink under control. She wants this!"

"Yeah well then that's good. But do you? It's a lot to take on, another child"

"Yeah! Yeah I do. look …" he looks around so no one can hear "I love her Ray. I always have, you know that. I feel complete when she's around "

"Jason, she's messes with your head, she complicates your life. I know you love her man, but sometimes… well it gets messy, right." He sighs "You and her it gets very messy. But seriously if it's what you want then I'm here for you, you know that." Ray smiles and slaps him on the shoulder

"Good so you'll cover me, if I'm not back"

"Yeah sure… You know that you don't have to ask"

"Okay, look we'll meet up for drinks when I get back, celebrate me getting cleared to operate " he laughs "looks like we gonna get spun up in the next forty-eight anyway if Mandy has anything to do with it! "He checks his watch "I gotta go"

"Something up there?" Sonny leans over Rays shoulder as Jason leaves the room

"I don't know Sonny, I hope not. "

"Where's he going in such a hurry?"

"I don't know , he said he'll meet us for drinks later"

Sonny frowns as he looks at Ray, something's not right and he's not convinced when Ray says he doesn't know where he's going.

o-o-o-o-o-o

"CJ where are you? Pick up the god damn phone. This is the second message I've left " she's still not answering "I'll come get you so don't leave for the clinic."

He gets back to the house. He's been worried the whole journey back . Not only did she not pick up his calls, but his mind keeps thinking back to the strange visitor she had there this morning.

"CJ!" he calls out as he unlocks the front door "CJ … CJ, where are you?" he looks around. There's no sign of her. Then as he pushes the bedroom door open he sighs with relief. There she is curled up fast asleep on the bed. "Oh, thank God!" he lets out a long sigh all his worries are gone. He smiles, she's just overslept

"Hey sleepy head" He smiles "Looks like it was a good job I came to get ya. You would have missed the appointment " He brushes her hair back from her face but still she doesn't wake up. He can see her breathing deeply and he frowns, she's out cold.

Confused at first then his face drops as he notices the glass tumbler on the side table beside the bed "Oh no .. shit! CJ, WAKE UP!" he puts his hand on her shaking her awake "Come on WAKE UP! What the hell is this?" he points to the glass "What the hell have you done. We had an appointment!"

She sits up rubbing her head _Oh, shit!_ She frowns seeing him sitting there. "Oh um… look its not what you think. It was just a small one, just to help me sleep. I just wanted to rest. I had all these thoughts going around. I just needed to switch off"

"CJ You can't do this, especially not now. We had this discussion; you know this is wrong. CJ the baby!"

"Its fine! Look it's not gonna do any harm, it was just one."

He shakes his head; pulling his hands though is hair. He's struggling, not knowing what to do now. "CJ you need to speak to me. When you feel this way you need to call me or call your sponsor, call Trent, Clay anyone. We put things in place, we discussed this. We can't help you if you don't call us."

"I know …I know I should have done. I'm sorry. Oh god Jason, I'm so sorry"

"Okay look..." he sighs "we don't have time now. We need to get to this appointment"

"Sorry…" She brushes her hair back and reties her ponytail "look I'll be fine it was just a wobble"

"That guy, Wade, that came here. Is it him, the thoughts is that what worried you? That's caused you to need a drink"

"No! No, Wade... he's' fine He's not a problem" she shakes her head "Jason I'm fine" she wraps her arms around his neck and kisses him"Let's just get to the scan okay?"

"Yeah sure!"he sighs "We'll um... we'll go get some food when we've done. I told the guys we'd meet at the bar. Celebrate me getting cleared to operate. It um... it looks like we gonna get spun up in the next couple of days, from what Mandy's putting together but I wanted to tell the guys about the baby before we go."

"Okay …" she sighs. She wipes the tears from her face. She feels guilty for drinking "Okay if that's what you want then you're right we can tell them, if you want" She bites her lip anxiously She doesn't really want to tell the guys but after what she just did she has no choice

"Great!" he leans in and kisses her lip. "You gonna be ready to go?


	50. Chapter 50

**Chapter 50: I've got something to say**

They enter the bar and they can't stop laughing and smiling. Jason kisses her as he holds the door, his hand wrapped around her waist as he breaks the kiss he can see the guys sat at the booth table and they're already drinking.

"I'll get us some drinks" As Jason gets to the bar he looks around and catching Ray's attention he nods to acknowledge him. CJs stood in front of him and standing over her from behind he protectively wraps his arm around her waist his hands coming to rest on her swollen belly "

"What can I get ya, Jason?" the barman smiles at the pair of them

"What you want, a lime soda" he can feel himself smiling, his grin broad across his face. He's in a really great mood now. Not only has he been signed back onto active duty, but they've just been and seen the baby, his baby another new life he created. _It doesn't get much better than this._ He smiles to himself, kissing the back of her neck

She thinks for a minute "Lime soda?" She questions I was thinking a "large whiskey" She laughs teasingly as the barman repeats her order,

Jason frowns, he doesn't find it funny "No, lime soda!"

"Aw! Spoilsport!" she continues to chuckle though seeing his face glaring at her smiles drops to a frown "Oh lighten up Jason, it was a joke!" she sighs annoyed that he didn't find it funny but if she was honest she wasn't joking. She really could drink a large whiskey right now.

Her body's on edge, tingling with nerves. On the way here from the hospital, all Jason had done was talk, coerce and try to convince her to let him tell the guys about the baby. She didn't want that, not yet anyway unsure how some of them might react to the news, she wanted to keep it secret a while longer. She definitely didn't want to announce it publicly in a bar, preferring him, them, to tell each one in person.

He's still stroking his hands on her stomach as they stand there. He snuggles his chin into her neck, whispering in her ear while kissing the side of her head "A baby we're having a baby! Can you believe it"

 _Shhh_! "Jason, will you keep it down, someone will hear you" she looks around apprehensively before pushing his hands away from her stomach

"You still sure I can't tell anyone, yet?" he gives her one of his cute smiles "I'm kinda excited I just wanna..."

"No!" she halts him. She looks him in the eyes, she can see the joyous sparkle, but she sighs reluctantly "Look, like I said, let's just enjoy it ourselves first, yeah?" she coughs "Anyway, you need to tell your other kids first and ... and you're Mom. God knows what Linda's gonna have to say about this" she sighs again taking a sip of the lime soda

"Yeah!" Jason sighs at the thoughts of telling his Mom. He takes a long swig of his beer "That is not gonna be fun!"

"Yeah, well it's gonna be even worse if she's not the first to know or maybe hears it elsewhere first"

CJ gives a long sigh. The thought of Linda finding out at all makes her shudder while she might appear, outwardly, to like CJ but it's more than clear she only tolerates her for Jason's sake and she hopes that she'll be gone from his life soon. So, the whole thing about them having another baby, it's not going to go down well, not at all.

She sips the club soda and sneers at the taste _Urggghh!_ "God, that's foul"

"You hungry?" Jason picks up a menu "I could really eat a steak burger right now!"

"So, so. Not fussed. My stomach's still a little nauseous. You order, I'll have some of yours"

"Alright, let's go sit with the guys then"

o-o-o-o-o-o

Davis looks up gesturing Sonny towards the bar "There's Jason and CJ"

He and Ray turn around, Ray putting his hand up to acknowledge them. "They're coming over"

Davis watches how they're behaving, their body language as they stand, Jason wrapped around her. She frowns as she leans across to Sonny's ear "Seriously they need to get a room. He really can't keep his hands off her, but it's kinda nice don't you think, after everything that's happened they seem to have made it through , as a couple I mean"

Sonny chews his gum and takes a deep breath. He shakes his head "That's cos he's stupid and thinks with what's between his legs when it comes to her." He sighs taking a long swig of his beer.

"Sonny, you're so hard on her at times, can't you just be happy for them?" She frowns "Don't you think things seems to have settled down a lot more now this past few months since what happened with his leg"

 _Hmmm!_ "Believe me, there's still plenty of time for it to all blow up in his face. The honeymoon be over soon then her true colors will show again, believe me"

Everyone looks up and smiles as they join them at the table. Jason's happy demeanor obvious to them all

"Anyone want tequila?" he smiles "I'm buying"

"Hell yeah, I'm up for that boss, especially if you payin' " Sonny laughs "This some sort of celebration?

"You wanna sit down?" Ray gets up and offers his seat to C.J, after what Jason told him he can't help but treat her with a little more sensitivity "You alright?"

"Um... you know what, I'm just gonna go to the restroom" she smiles "but thanks. I'll be back in a minute"

Clay lifts his beer to his lips, he's watching her the whole time, he can tell there's something not quite right, something on her mind. She knows he's watching and only quickly glances at him the once and then she avoids his gaze, turning to go towards the bathroom.

"She okay?" Clay frowns "Doesn't quite seem herself today"

"Yeah she's good" Jason smiles. He turns around to check on her. He sighs. He' admit Clay's right she has been a little out of sorts since they left the hospital "I think she has some stuff on her mind but she's okay" he drinks more of his beer.

Sonny arrives back from the bar with the tray of shots "So, what we celebrating here boss?"

"Oh, I don't know..." Jason takes a deep breath "I guess... me getting declared fit to operate. I need to get you rabble back in shape for a start" he laughs and raises his glass "yeah that and new beginnings" he smiles

"New beginnings!" they raise their glasses and toast. Jason necks his shot back and gets up headed towards the bar " I'll get another tray"

Sonny raises his eyes "You know I like this mood he's in. I wonder how long it lasts till he's back to kicking our ass's. Though seriously, he okay Ray? I mean, he seems ... I don't know, too happy, for him"

"I guess" Ray shrugs "I think he's just happy, getting signed off. He wants to get back to work"

"Yeah I guess" Sonny frowns "just seems something more than that, you know what I mean"

At the bar Jason opens his wallet as he does the picture from the scan inside drops out. As he picks up the tray filled with shot glasses then places it down on the table in front of the guys he looks around for CJ, concerned as she's been gone for some time.

Clay frowns he can see the nervous look of concern on his face "You okay boss?"

"Um...yeah, yeah I'm fine" he coughs, scratching anxiously at his neck "Um...right listen up, I've got something I need to say. I wanted to tell you while you're all here together and I might not get a chance before we get spun up." He looks behind him at the door to the rest room, then takes a deep breath he know she won't like it, he said he'd wait but he can't hold it any longer

"Well c'mon then, what is it?" Ray frowns

"Yeah c'mon boss spill, I knew you wuz hiding something" Sonny picks up another shot and necks it back "I know what it is, you gonna tell us you like teaching green team and you not comin back" he laughs

Oh no! Trent groans to himself, he thinks he can guess what's coming, Jason already told him where they were going. He's worried not sure if this really is the time or place to announce it and he has a doubtful feeling about C.J's being on board with this

"Look, she will probably kill me when she comes back, but what the hell" he smiles "You're gonna find out soon anyways, we can't hide it much longer" he takes another deep breath as he nervously laughs then he places the scan picture on the table

Everyone looks down to look at it then one by one they look at him and then exchange confused glances with each other, each one of them hoping someone else will speak first.

Sonny sighs, the look on his face drops on one of confusion and he can't help it he has to ask  
"Oh Lord, is this for real? She's havin a baby!?"

"No Sonny" Jason sighs shaking his head "What you think I faked a scan. Of course, it real you dumbass!"

"It's yours! I mean you and her, you like really...she's got a bun in the over again"? Sonny feels kind of shocked, like this weird feeling of not knowing what to say. Whether to act happy or sad about it .

It's Trent's turn to speak he too takes a long deep breath before he begins. But he's also guessing that CJ doesn't know he's just shared their news. But it's too late, they're about to find out what she thinks as she arrives back at the table.

"What going on?" she frowns at the intense feeling, them all staring at her and the blank expressions on every one of their faces "What?" she frowns "Alright, what did I do now? Jason... Trent?!" she continues to frown and even after avoiding his gaze for so long, she even now looks at Clay for answers

He's staring at the black and white picture and then his gaze turns up wards, his eyes locking on CJs. She frowns questioning him then her eyes follow where she looks back down at the table the picture. For a moment not registering what it is she laughs but quickly it turns to a gasp and she picks it up

Ray can feel the awkward tension and now Jason's' opened the lid on the box there's no way he's shutting it again now, even if from her face he wishes he could. He raises his glass "A toast" he smile apprehensively " to Jason and CJ, congratulations to new beginnings"

Not knowing what else to do all of the others follow exactly what he did raise the glass toast and celebrate. She's ignored all of them, blocking out their pathetic sounds all she can heard is herself going _What the fuck! What the fuck!_ Over and over

She looks at Jason her face drops "What the fuck have you done?! Oh my god, JASON!" she gasps unable to get her breath "I thought we agreed about this? You just _had_ to didn't you, there was no way you could keep quiet! Jesus!" She claws her hands in her hair, her gaze searching the faces of everyone who's now staring at her so intensely. "Shit Jason... one thing I asked you not to do" she's lost for words with him, she shakes her head "You fucking asshole!"

He's kind of shocked by her language toward him, unable to understand exactly why she this annoyed "Oh c'mon C.J! Look, they were gonna find out soon anyway you .can't exactly hide it much longer"

"Still I asked you not to do this" She shakes her head and walks off

"CJ...c'mon!" _Oh shit!_ He sighs staring at Ray, he has this pitiful look "You got something to say there Ray?"

"Oh, come on Jace, even you have to admit, that was a bit stupid?" he sighs "C'mon man you should have waited or...or at least told her you were gonna say something." He takes a breath looking at the empty doorway "Look man at least go after her and damn well apologize"

Jason looks at everyone, they all nod, agreeing with Ray , about the apology. He feels sort of stupid, the way she reacts "Ray, you're right I better go after her" he drinks more of his beer first "Shit!" he rubs his head

Clay bites his lip, he smiles at Ray telling Jason off, but there's more to his smiles. He has more on his mind than just that. 

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"C.J c'mon,... _Please!_ Look, I'm sorry, okay!" Hes in the parking lot pleading with her as she stand beside the truck, waiting for him to unlock it so she can get in. "Just open the damn truck and take me home"

"No, not until you listen. Look I get it, I do. I should have waited like you asked but you know I... I was kinda excited and I didn't think. Hey c'mon, I'm a Navy seal I'm not good at the emotional stuff, right?" He clamps his hands onto her shoulders, rubbing gently at her arms and then tries to lean in and kiss her.

She wont wear it though and dramatically pulls away, snapping. "Take me home!"

"Oh, come on it's out there now, just stay, get something to eat"

"No Jason!" she sighs getting a grip on her anger "Why have you always gotta back me into a corner get me to do something I don't want" She shakes her head. Annoyed, she shrugs his hands away from her, pulling her hands through her hair in frustration.

"What'd ya mean _always_?"

"Like with those tablets. Trent telling you about the baby and now you telling them this. No one asked me about any of that stuff" she angrily swallows her tears back "Maybe I haven't got my head around it yet? Maybe, just maybe I needed some time to accept it happening. Did you think that?"

"So what? Are you saying to don't want this baby? But I thought it's what you wanted. Normal you said"

"You thought, but you didn't ask" she sighs "Give me the damn keys, I'll drive myself home"

"C'mon CJ, don't be like this" he sighs reluctantly he takes the keys from his pocket looking at them "Why is it so wrong that they know?"

"I said give me the fucking keys!"

"Okay...okay! Calm down." He hands her the keys "CJ please!" _Oh, Jesus Christ!_ He sigh, crouching down in the parking lot, he takes a moment. The exasperation he feels as she drives away _Fuck!_

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

As Jason returns to the bar they all sit quiet with no one quite sure what to say now "That went well!" he sighs picking up the bottle and drinking down whats left of it

"I'll get some more beers " Sonny gets up from his seat and gestures with a nod to Davis "You wanna give me a hand"

Ray places his hand on Jason's back, rubbing it sympathetically "She'll calm down, just give her some time to cool off" Jason nods in an acknowledged reply and Ray lets out a long sigh "Sonny's getting some more beer" Jason nods again as head in hands he sits down

Clay hasn't commented, merely sitting quietly in the corner. He's contemplating what just go on as he too finishes the last of his beer. As he looks up he watches the silent Jason sitting there. Coughing to clear the dryness from his throat he finally speaks  
"So um... how far along is she, I mean when's the baby due?" the words just seem to fall out of Clay's mouth without him having any thought of control over them.

Jason ignores him and doesn't answer, his eyes glance upwards as Sonny places the bottles of beer on the table. Picking one up he takes a long drink. Sonny's staring at Clay as he pushes a bottle in front of him, his expression willing Clay to shut up, to not say anything.

"Um... they ...they weren't quite sure " Jason rubs his face "they said about fifteen weeks. Which would be about right" He picks the scan up from the table staring at it as he scratches his head. He's lost, unsure what he should do now _Shit!_ He sighs loudly and puts the beer down "Ray, can you give me a lift back, man. I better go check on her"

"Yeah sure, sure that's not a problem but..." Ray puts down his beer " look, there's no rush. Drink your beer, give her some time to cool down. Trust me from experience the last thing you need is to piss off a hormonal woman and especially one like C.J"

"Hey Jace, so how 'bout you let me whoop your ass at pool first?" Sonny nudges him softly in the ribs with his elbow

"Yeah sure why not. Ray's right, I'll Let her cool down. Anyway, I don't know what the problem was you can already tell anyway, weren't gonna be long before someone noticed. It's not like she can hide it forever, right?"

Ray and Trent look at each, they both know he can say what he likes but it's not going to stop CJ being pissed at him.

"Come on man let's find this pool cue. Maybe I can kick your ass, before she does!"

Clay's now sat by himself, he's lost in his own thoughts. Looking at the blank message screen on his cell phone.

Davis sits opposite him, quietly drinking her beer, she has her eyes on him and she can't stop watching "You okay, Clay?"

"Yeah sure" he looks up nodding. He smiles awkwardly, clearing the screen texts "So, you want a game, of pool I mean"

"Yeah why not" she smiles " I can kick your ass too?"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay's back from the bar. Sitting in the comfort of the chair in Sonny's apartment. The lights are off the room dark apart from the dim flicker of the TV screen. The images flicker but the sound is off as he sits quietly, miles away. He's lost in thought, holding the beer. He opened it but he's been so engaged in his head that he's not really drinking it.

Suddenly the peaceful sanctuary is shattered as Sonny stumbles out of the bedroom. He's only wearing his short's and his cowboy hat and Lisa follows him, wrapped only in the bed sheet.

She leans, reaching up and kisses him "Just get me my water, cowboy." She smiles "and then you can show me that move again"

She's laughing, smiling kissing his chest, gripping the sheet covering her breasts but nothing else. Sonny leans in to kiss her, pulling her tight against his body, holding her butt and rubbing himself against her.

Clay coughs, apologetically, letting them know he's there

 _Oh Shit!_ Lisa looks around Sonny's shoulder, pulling the sheet tighter around her body, covering her exposed flesh "Sonny!" she nods gesturing towards Clay

"Ooops! Sorry there Blondie didn't see ya. I thought you wuz asleep, otherwise we would never have...you know" he coughs awkwardly "So what you doin' sittin there in the dark all alone?"

Lisa leans on Sonny with her head buried in his chest embarrassed "I'm um... I'm just gonna ..." She smiles and then disappears into the bedroom "Sonny, bring me that bottle of water, wontcha!"

"Yeah sure thing Rodeo girl" he sighs frowning as he heads to the fridge "You okay there Poster boy?" he frowns watching him in the light as he opens the door "You want anythin' ?" he points to the kitchen where he's headed. He's worried about him "what's the matter with you not sleeping?"

"No, no I'm good!" he holds up the bottle of beer, not that he's drunk any of it.

"Oh, okay well don't be drinking too much. I think we'll be getting a spin up anytime soon." Sonny rummages in the fridge looking for something to eat as he takes out a bottle of water for Lisa. He settles on a beer for himself.

Clay smiles, the irony of Sonny saying don't drink too much as he takes a beer from the fridge

"So, c'mon then, spill. Wassup?" Sonny frowns watching him from the open doorway of the kitchen. He leans against the wall just his shorts and hat on as he drinks from his beer.

"Nothing just couldn't sleep"

"You in pain again?"

"No! No, I'm good. Just um... doing some thinking"

"Doin' some thinkin' okay well that sounds painful right there. So, what you thinking about? What's so important that it's keeping you awake at night. You still getting them nightmares?"

"Oh, I don't know!" Clay sighs as he shrugs his shoulders "Just thinking about what happened at the bar. With Jason and CJ."

"Yeah well, you can stop thinking 'bout that, it's Jason's problem not yours"

He nods, sitting still and quiet. Deep in contemplation He swallows nervously and then clearing his throat he looks up "You think um... it'll work out, between them. I mean with a new baby. I mean..." he shrugs "it's not like he did the whole baby bit with Jaycee this'll be different this time."

"Oh, hell Clay ..." Sonny frowns, he's concerned "why the hell you worryin' about this" He stares at him he can tell it's something hes been thinking about for a good while now "Look, who the hell knows with them. Clay she's messed up and I'm fucked if she probably knows what she's doin'" he laughs "So just forget about it, like I said their problem not yours"

Sonny takes a long swig on the beer bottle. His eyes are fixed on the still silent Clay, sitting lost in his thoughts miles away from here " You know Clay, some days I think maybe she's finally got it all figured out and sorted herself and then..."he laughs again " then she goes fucks the whole thing up again. Throws some damn curve ball inta the mix and then I think .. nope there she is the same ol' pain in the ass she's always been. Leopard never gonna change its spots Clay"

He shakes his head, glugging again at the beer " But I do know, you keepin' yourself up at night, worryin' about this it aint gonna change a damn thing"

Clay frowns. He nods silently, his eyes slowly drift up to meet Sonny's "So, you think it was planned, I mean having this baby you think they talked about it before they had it"

"Hell NO!" Sonny laughs. The beer in his mouth swallows back to quickly and he nearly choke. Coughing he can hardly speak "Planned!? Fuck no! What the hell would make you even think that? Jesus what the hell you drinking there, stupidity juice!" Sonny laugh turns to a frown as he sees Clay doesn't find it funny "Okay, so why so serious. Clay, what is it?"  
He frowns concerned. He's worried now. "So, what's really goin' on in that head of yours, why you showing so much concern over this?"

"I dunno!" Clay shrugs "Who said I was?"

"Okay so if you're not then why you sittin' here in the dark, not sleepin' hmmmm?" he drinks what is the last of the beer, standing the bottle on the counter top "Look man, I thought you were over that, her I mean. You still thinking about her? I thought you accepted what was going on with her and Jason. That you put it behind ya"

"Yeah I have. No really, I'm good about it. I even got a date with that nurse, from the hospital." he smiles

"Well that's good then. You moving on. Like Ray said, new beginnings" Sonny's still not convinced, that vacant look that fake smile something doesn't add up.

"Yup moving on!" Clay raises his beer "New beginnings!" as he forces another smile to his face

"Alright, cards on the table. What's eatin ya, and don't tell me nothin or that it's all good cos I aint buyin that bull crap now"

"I don't know I um..." He sigh rubbing his head "I was just thinking the timing, of this baby. There's just um... well a thought crept in my head that maybe, what if..." He stops, doesn't finish his sentence as Lisa come to the doorway

"Sonny, you got my water there cowboy?" she smiles. She watches the concerned look he has as he hands her the plastic bottle of water "Everything okay?"

"Yeah sure" he smiles

"Sonny?... What's going on?"

"Nothing... no nothin' he's okay, aint that right little buddy?"

"Clay, there' something worrying you?"

"No nothing. Sonny's right. Go back to bed, Lisa"

"Hey, we're always gonna worry about you" Sonny smiles "But know this Clay, I'm right here. Night or day, you can come to me with anything. I mean Anything!.. you know that right? So, you got something you wanna say, then spill it."

Clay wonders when Sonny became so in touch with feelings, such a good listener. So good with advice "Yeah thanks brother, you're a really good friend." He smiles "Now just leave me in peace and take your woman back in that bedroom"

"Yes Sir!" Sonny smiles as he cheekily grins at Lisa. Her face flushes with a red blush as Sonny guides her back inside the bedroom. He hesitates at the door "You're good though, right?" he frowns still concerned by Clay's quiet contemplation "You promise you would tell me, if there was something?"

"Yeah... yeah I'll be fine. Now got to bed. You're right we're probably gonna get spun up soon"

Sonny smiles because just as the words leave Clay's lips there's a sudden chorus of cell phones bleeping . "Oh, Dang it! Well, looks like that's us done for tonight then. You know I'm blamin you for this Clay"

o-o-o-o-o-o

Davis picks up her clothes from the floor. They're strewn around the bedroom from where Sonny took them in such a hurry "Can you see my panties?" she frowns as she checks under the bed

"Nope, but then I did I tell ya you look better without them"

"Sonny this is not funny. I need to get dressed. Did you not hear the phone"?

"Yeah but ... then we still we got time for another quick um...you know if you fancy it?"

"NO! No, we don't." she nods to the doorway "Plus Clay, remember. He's just through there. He can hear us."

"Hmmm! Yeah... I remember. The one sitting in the dark by himself, worrying about things he can't change. Things that don't concern him. That Clay you mean?"

"Yeah. So, what's wrong with him?"

"Who knows?" Sonny sighs rubbing his head "Says he's thinking about Jason, and her. About them having this baby. Some reason he won't say it's got in his head"

"I thought he'd laid all that to rest. I mean thought he'd moved on"

"I thought so too, but guess Jason coming out with that in the bar, well its opened that wound up again"

Finally, Lisa finds her panties and pulls them up her legs. Pulling her white t-shirt over her head. She sits down on the side of the bed thinking.

Watching her, how quiet she suddenly becomes Sonny frowns "So, what you thinking about now?"

"I don't know?" she shakes her head

"You don't know, you don't know what you thinking?" he stands over and lifts her chin. He frowns and then leans forward giving her a long lingering kiss "Davis, talk to me"

She makes this long sighing sound as she smiles "I was thinking, about the baby. Jason and CJs new baby"

"Oh hell!" Sonny frowns "You not thinking about having babies I mean like us are ya?" he sighs staring at her "Cos that is a whole another level on the Sonny Quinn life planner scale"

"No!" she laughs "No, Sonny not us having babies, um ...Hello...OCS, remember!"

"Okay that's fine, cool but you know we'd need a whole long talk if it was"

"No, I was um... " She sighs "I was just thinking about Clay and well... you um... you don't think he's wondering if, well if...you know?"

"You know you will make a great officer Lisa Davis; you know why? Cos you talk in bullshit riddles that no one understands. What the hell you talking about?"

She laughs awkwardly biting her lip "What I mean is you don't think he's wondering if the baby is his?"

"What the hell?! " Sonny frowns "Why would he be thinking that?"

"Um...you know because... they, well you know"

"What? Wait, are you sayin you think it might be as well?"

"Well, I was just thinking about the timing I'm just saying, there's a possibility it could"

"No. No, we not going that road again. Last time there was plenty of doubt all round this time Jason's one hundred percent convinced it's his"

"Yeah but maybe he just hasn't thought about it. I mean you didn't think but Clay obviously has. Might be why she was so pissed about him telling us all like that. Look Sonny, I'm just talking out loud here, I'm not saying it's true"

"How the hell could it be his I mean when?"

"Well, look they were sleeping with each other, just before Clay got took hostage right. So that's what ..." she thinks in her head " three and half months ago, give or take. So, I'm just saying, it's a possibility. Maybe Clay's thinking the same thing" she shrugs 

"Holy shit!" Sonny rubs his head and sits on the bed "Sweet Lord! Well we better just hope that thought goes away and pretty damn fast"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Hey! Look, I don't have a white flag, but truce?" Jason puts his hands up. He laughs. It's obvious by the way he's swaying around in the doorway that he's had quite a bit to drink. "You're right I know I shouldn't have said anything You weren't ready for a public announcement like that. I get it. I do and I'm sorry "

"I just wanted bit more time. Get my head around it, you know"

"Yeah I know. Look I'm trying, to do better on the emotional stuff and I know I don't get it right but come on its not so bad is it? I mean, at least they know now, and we don't have to keep pretending, right?"

"That's not the point. I mean they all think badly enough of me as it is, without thinking I'm even more stupid, to let this happen again"

"Hey, I thought we talked about that. It's not your fault, okay. It happened and I'm just as much to blame" He puts his hand around her waist and pulls her towards him "Come here" he kisses the top of her head "It's gonna be fine you'll see"

"Have you been drinking?" she asks him as he kisses her

"A little" he smiles as he runs his hands round and over her butt

"Jason!" she pushes him back

"Hey c'mon ..." He gives her _that_ smile, he leans forward his lips kissing into her neck.  
She turns her head, trying to ignore him. Trying to tease him and play hard to get. He smiles watching the look on her face, his hand finding the hem of her shirt and pulling it up

She leans back pulling away from him "Jason stop!"

"Okay you want me to stop?" he smile questioning her as he moves his kisses down on her chest. Lifting the fabric, exposing her breasts. His mouth biting gently the soft of his tongue finding her tense nipple, licking around it "You sure you still want me to stop?" he smiles again.

She bites her lip, leaning her head back _Mmmm!_ Maybe!" she lets out this breathless sigh "Hmmm! Really, we should stop!"

"Really?" he looks at her. "You really want me to stop, are you sure?" his mouth teasing at her breast again, sucking harder, his other hand finding her other nipple pulling at it

She closes her eyes, enjoying the sensation. She smiles _"Ohhhh... God"_ she bites her lip "Yes...yes, you need to stop"

He runs his fingers along the inside edge of her lace panties "Okay I'm stopping. You want me to stop this too?" he smiles, still watching as his fingers work their way inside her panties. He doesn't stop. Now finding her lips his tongue forcing its way into her throat. She can taste the beer from earlier and she wants him. Wrapping hear arms around his neck as the tip of her finger's contacts with that sweet spot just inside the wet of her lace underwear

 _Oh god!_ she gasps as he forces his hand between her legs "No ...no, don't stop!" she sighs panting with want now. She can feel the hard bulge growing in the front of his pants, her hand groping and teasing at it as she undoes the buckle on his belt . "Okay fuck me! Fuck me now!" She smiles looking him in the eyes. Her tongue desperately thrusting against his.

He breaks the kiss pulling back, dropping his pants to the floor "No, I didn't think so" he has this glint in his eye as pulls at the lace of her knickers _Mmmm!_ "God I love you and I'm sorry okay" he whispers breathlessly in her ear, while he forces his hardness against her.

She nods "I'm sure you can find a way to make it up to me!" She stops her arms locked around his neck, hesitating at the sounds from the hallway "Emma! She sighs "She's in her room"

"Okay, c'mon. Let's take this somewhere more private" he takes her hand, leading her to their bedroom.

Pushing her back on the bed, he pulls his shirt over his head throwing it to the floor, as she strokes her hand over his chest. He's quick in his moves and he soon has her naked in front of him. His hand smoothing its way over her stomach, the gently curve of her skin.

"I know I don't tell you enough how beautiful you are!" he kisses her neck, biting softly, making light red marks against the skin. His hand strokes gently up the inside of her thigh, parting her legs. She takes a sharp intake of breath. Apprehensive to his touch as he forces his fingers inside her

 _Oh god!_ cries out quietly. Gasping wantonly as he teases her. His mouth finding the small hard bud on her chest, biting , sucking bringing her pleasure

" _Oh god_ ...Jason please!" she nods as he positions himself between her legs, bending her knees for her him, ready as she feels the hard of his cock waiting to penetrate her. She closes her eyes the anxious pleasure but then just as presses against her, that first thrust as she feels his full hardness filling her insides, there's a Bleeping sound.

 _Oh Shit!_ Jason closes his eyes it's the sound of his phone. It bleeps again and again.  
And then just as things heat up his phone goes off. ## Bleep!## Bleep!

"Ignore it!" she whispers breathlessly, thrusting her hips forward her clit is on fire wanting to be touched " Jason please, just ignore it " she kisses his mouth frantically her hips bucking against him.

Shit! He hesitates "C.J I can't"

"Oh please?" she begs she wants this so much she's practically fucking him now. "Just ten minutes . c'mon she teases You want this ... "

He smiles, quickly checking the message on his phone "Ten minutes!" he bites his lip. Lifting her butt with his hands as he forces himself deep inside her, pulling back and then thrusting again.

 _Oh fuck!_ Her back arches her hips bucking wildly as she works herself up . she can feel the heady height of her climax coming. She's right there on the edge as he forces against her. The urgency of his movements, his probing it's all too much and she pants for air her muscles contract wildly as he touches her clit with his finger, and then she can do nothing but moan until the last breath of her orgasm fades. He looks her in the eyes, and smiles Then this last powerful thrust and there's a deep warmth filling her.

 _Oh god!_ he smiles " I really have to go now!"

"You said ten minutes! That was more like five"

He crashes beside her rubbing the soft skin on her arm with his fingertips "Sorry guess you got me more worked up than I realized"

"You know you owe me, when you get back!" she grins teasingly. His fingers are drawing small circles on her stomach

"You know I missed all this last time, the whole pregnancy thing. I'm gonna be here for you this time"

She closes her eyes not trying not to think about it. She sighs "Yeah it wasn't much fun last time for me either. I mean, I was in and out of rehab. Then I suddenly I had this baby. It was all a bit of a blur to be honest, took me a while to cope"

He kisses her forehead as he looks at his watch "Look sorry, I need to go, but we'll make it right this time. Enjoy it" She nods as he kisses her bell. Then come up face to face with her. He brushes her hair back and kisses her lips "We'll do it right!"

"Yeah whatever " She smiles awkwardly, suddenly very conscious of how naked she is. Looking down at her stomach she feels very uncomfortable, very unattractive "I need to get dressed too" She sighs "I'll see you when you get back!"

He kisses her and grabs his phone as she wraps her dressing gown around her. "Oh, my mother's gonna pick Mikey up for a few days and Emma going to some friends camp over thing, so you'll only have JC to worry about"

"Yeah well don't forget you need to talk to Linda, now that you spilled the beans to the guys. You need to tell her and the kids"

Oh shit! "Damn! I forgot about her."

"Yeah.. you could say oh shit! Still that's your problem not mine You were the one so keen to tell everyone!" She laughs as he rolls on to his back, sighing. The nerves he can feel at the thought of having to tell his mother he's having another baby.


	51. Chapter 51

**Chapter 51: Unwell**

CJ answers the knock on the door.

"Mikey!" She calls out to the bedroom "Your Gran is here to pick you up. Time to go!"

"Catherine!" Linda sneers as she acknowledges her as she holds the door open for her

"Mikey!... Did you hear me? I suppose you'd better come in and wait" CJ ignores the venomous look on her face "He's in his room. Probably got his headphones on, or perhaps he's just ignoring me as usual. I'll go and check, you better come in and wait."

Linda looks her up and down "Jason on operations?"

"Yeah"

"Well you can certainly tell. This house is a mess, Catherine!"

CJ sighs, shakes her head "Yeah well, you know there are other people live here, not just me … MIKEY! Will you come now!" she shouts at the top of her voice "Hurry up! Your Gran is waiting" _And the sooner she leaves the happier I'll be!_

"Oh, I'm not in a hurry" she smiles "I was going to spend some time with Jaycee first before we leave" Linda knows it will irk CJ, her being here in the house "Where is he?" CJ sighs again, rolling her eyes she reluctantly points Linda to where he is on the rug in the living room "Hey little man, Grandma Hayes is here" Linda smiles at him "You're getting so big now"

CJ rolls her eyes again Y _eah JC she_ _loves to play doting Grandma, but she hates your Mommy. So, great isn't she! S_ he shakes her head, leaving Linda to it she heads to the kitchen. Pouring herself a coffee she closes her eyes rubbing the pain she feels _Awww!_

"Something wrong with you?" Linda frowns as she notices her holding her back

"No. Not really" she rubs it again "Just a pain in my back. I've had it for a few days now"

Linda nods "So are you back working now?"

"No" CJ shakes her head "Why? Do you have a problem with me not working?"

"So, Jason's the only one working right now ?"

CJ sighs "You know Linda, there's always something for you to make an issue of. If Jason wants me to contribute to the bills on his house then he only has to ask and I'm happy to. Actually, you know I did get a job offer .." she decides to torment her some "but um…. it's in Washington. And that would mean moving everyone. I didn't see the point right now " C.J smiles, she knows Linda won't like the thought of them moving, especially to Washington "and with things as they are, it isn't possible but not to say we're not thinking about it. I mean it's more money than Jason makes"

"What job?" Linda glares at her " There something more I should know about?"

"Oh no doubt Jason will speak to you" she smiles "When he gets back!"

"Hey Grandma"

"Emma!" she kisses her granddaughter "Hello darling, I thought you were going to your friends? Well that's what your dad told me." She sees Emma's face as her and CJ exchanged looks "or you could come back with us, if you want? If you don't want to stay here."

"No, I am going to my friends. I just thought I'd wait until you picked Mikey up first. Then I'll leave" she looks at C.J again. It's clear that there is no love lost between Emma and CJ. They don't talk much and try to stay away from each other. They're civil for Jason's sake, but Emma won't do anything she says unless it the _"Can you watch J.C for me!"_

C.J makes her coffee and opens some cookies. Which she starts to eat straight from the packet as Linda watches her. "You know, maybe, if you spent some time cleaning up the house, it might give you something to do instead of sitting around doing nothing all day"

"Thanks, I'll keep that in mind!" She smiles as she turns the TV on and lays herself down on the couch.

Linda shakes her head and picks JC up, taking him to look out the window "Will you be alright, to look after him?"

C.J frowns at her "What do you mean will I be alright? He's my son, of course, I'll be fine!"

"I mean, I can take him with me if it would make your life easier"

As much as CJ considers the option, and it would be good to have some peace, she won't. Mainly because it's Linda is suggesting it and so she won't agree "No he'll be fine here with me."

Linda watches her laid on the couch. She shakes her head "You know if you lay around like that doing nothing all day, you'll get fat. Especially if you're not even training now. I mean is that all you're going to do all day, while Jason's at work. He's risking his life to provide for this family" she frowns. "You know Catherine, I remember a time when all you would do when you were off was run, and train. Now you're like this. It's like you're a different person"

"Maybe I enjoy laying here. Besides I can't um...train at the moment. Oh, and just to remind you, Jason he does what he does, because he can't be without it. Nothing to do with providing for his family. He does it because he loves it. It would be too hard for him to give it up. So, don't lecture me"

Linda bites her tongue to keep the peace "I think need to have a word with my son when he gets back"

"Oh, you do that!"

"There's no point Grandma. He'll just take her side" Emma shrugs "Especially now!"

C.J frowns. "Are you trying to make a point there Emma?"

"Not now..." Emma sneers "..that they have this _new baby_ on the way!"

 _Shit!_ CJ closes her eyes "Emma!" she sits up and looks at her "Did your Dad speak to you about that?"

"No!" she frowns and pulls a face "You know, I also live in this house, and have ears. It's a fact that you both seen to forget!"

"A baby!?" Linda frowns, stunned at Emma's revelation " A sorry what? What baby?"

CJ shakes her head "I told you he's gonna speak to you when he gets back"

"Well then you tell him he needs to because I'm certainly not happy about this."

C.J rolls her eyes " Oh, there's a surprise. Well get used to it, because it's happening!"

"Really!" Linda's fuming "Oh my god, how can the pair of you be so irresponsible, again?" she carries J.C and goes through to Mikey's room to help him pack his things. _I can't believe they've let this happen! Oh, Jason what have you got yourself into with her._

"Thanks!" C J glares at Emma. Emma smirks, she knows her Grandma isn't going to be happy with this "Isn't it time you went to your friends?"

"When I'm ready" Emma smiles as she pours herself a coffee from the machine

"Be careful Emma"

"Why?" she glares back "If I was you, I'd be the worried one." she laughs "I mean this is my home, and if I get my dad to choose… then who _would_ he choose?"

"Oh, don't play your childish games with me Emma. I'm warning you. I'm getting a little bit fed up of your attitude, around me. It needs to improve. I'm here whether you like it or not, and so is this baby."

Emma doesn't say anything and just continues to smirk as Linda comes back through with Mikey and his bag. She looks at C.J on the couch. "Emma, would you be a dear and get me a bag for J.C please? I will take him with me and Mikey"

C.J lets out a long sigh and shakes her head. She would argue about it, but it actually suits her for Linda to take him, "Seriously, who do you think you are Linda?" She's still shaking her head, as she gets up and heads to the bedroom "You know what? Do what you want, I don't care anymore!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Some while later

"Right, Catherine we're off!" Linda coughs loudly to get her attention. Emma's at the door with her coat and bag too

"Oh, good you're going as well!"

"Don't forget. Tell Jason to call me as _soon_ as he gets back. I need to talk with him."

She nods, picking J.C up she gives him a kiss and cuddle "Now be a good boy for Grandma Hayes" She stares at Linda "Mommy loves you. See you when you get back."

Linda looks at her. Now that she's closer she can see that she's pregnant, her stomach showing a slightly swollen curve. "So how far gone are you?"

CJ looks away, biting her lip, she pulls her shirt down covering her bare flesh "Nearly four months"

"And my son, is he happy about it?"

"You know, sometimes Linda, you push it too far"C.J grinds her teeth and shakes her head then she sighs "Yes...yes, Jason's very happy about it"

Linda takes a deep breath she won't lose her cool, not with the children here "Just make sure you tell him to call me, as soon as he gets back"

"Sure!"

As they leave and the house goes quiet CJ sits, looking around. She sighs, bored already "I need some things, if I'm gonna be stuck here alone" She grabs her jacket and leaves.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

A couple of days have passed, and she's been on her own since the guys got spun up. She really hasn't done anything except lay on the couch watching movies. From her horizontal position on the couch she looks around the room. "I probably really should clean up, just in case Jason comes back"

She lets out a long sigh. She hasn't felt overly well the past few days and so can't muster the energy to bother. She's just had a shower and is laid there wearing one of Jason's tee shirts and just her knickers.

She goes to the kitchen to put some more coffee on. Noticing the couple of empty beer bottles of Jason's, that she drank are still sitting on the worktop. _Shit!_ "I really need to replace those, before he comes back"

She rubs her head, thinking wondering if it's more effort having to get dressed, go out to replace the beers or have the argument with him about drinking them in the first place _  
_

_I mean it's two and I didn't drink them in one go. I mean the doctor said the occasional drink did no harm._ She sighs, scratching her head, trying to decide what to do.

She now looks at the brown paper bag that's sitting on the worktop. She opens it and pulls out the new JD bottle it contains. _Oh well at least I haven't touched that!_ She smiles.  
Biting her lip she closes her eyes. There's a pain aching tension in her neck. She places the bottle back inside the brown paper bag. _Pheww!_ She takes a breath, trying to forget about it.

Her laptop is on the worktop and she switches it on. Opening up some of her emails to check on them _Hmmm!_ "Normal junk" she frowns "What's that?"

She opens the suspicious email, to find it contains overseas bank details, for the account that Wade told her about. She immediately closes the email, slamming the lid on the computer shut _Shit!_ She rubs her head with both hands trying to think, wondering if she should forget about it.

She's back on the couch but she's still thinking about that email, and Wade. She opens her cell and flicks through her contacts. What she's looking for is not there but there is a text that she didn't notice before. She frowns and sits up. It's from Clay. At first she wonders if it's him saying they're back. _But why would he tell me that?_ She frowns, checking the date and time.

It was sent in the early hours, just before they got spun up. She's not sure how she missed it perhaps because she's been a blur the past couple of days. She hasn't spoken to Clay, one on one, in quite some time and sitting there she takes a deep breath and then she opens it.

 _We need to talk. I need to know about the baby._

 _Oh shit!_ She swallows hard. "God-dammit" She screws up her face as a panic descends over her. She can't answer him and closes the text. _Shit!_

 _"Awww!"_ She sits up really straight in posture. The dull ache has moved around to her side. She leans forward and rubs at the intense wave of pain and she walks around the room until it passes.

Now she heads back to the kitchen and once again she stares hard at the brown paper bag. It's like the bottle is calling her, willing her to look at it. She gives in and takes the bottle out, removing the cap. And then without a thought she just takes a large sip.

"Oh god!" _Urggghh!_ The taste in her throat burns and instead of tasting good, it actually makes her feel sick. _Urggghh!_ "That's not good" She's not sure if it's the nerves of knowing she shouldn't drink it, or just that she actually does feel sick. "Oh god!" she leans over the sink retching then she heaves the contents of her stomach up

"Shit! ...urggghh!" She puts her hand to her mouth; she still feels really sick. Her hands are shaking as she puts the cap back onto the bottle.

She's about to put it away when she notices the Washington house paperwork on the countertop, and the mobile number for Wade on the top. Standing the JD bottle next to it she flicks through the papers. Some offers on the house, and some legal documents. She looks at the number on the front again and then picking her phone up she calls it, closing her eyes, hoping it goes to voicemail. There's a few silent moments then it beeps as the voicemail kicks in.

"Wade…. its Catherine …." She hesitates "Catherine Lewis" She pauses for quite some time just thinking about what to say "I've um...I've been thinking about that offer you made. Can you call me "

She sighs and leans her head back against the refrigerator. Biting her lip nervously she looks once again at the bottle of JD. She really tries to shake the feelings she has about but the temptation, is strong and in the end she can't resist it. She once again opens it up, taking another long swig out of the bottle.

 _Urggghh!_ she closes her eyes and puts her hand to her mouth holding it down this time. She looks up startled by a sudden loud knock at the door _Shit!_ She put the lid on, hurriedly gathers the beer bottles up in a bag and shoves them all into the cupboard under the sink.  
 _  
Who the hell is that?_ she's in a fluster _Just calm down, Jason wouldn't knock_ she smiles at the anxiety she causes herself. The knock comes again, and she tidies herself up. Pulling down her shirt. She ponders about getting some jeans on, but it's too much effort

"Coming just a minute! Who is it?"

"Delivery, needs signing"

"Okay coming! " she finds the key and unlocks the door, locking it a habit she's got in since Wade last walked in "What is it I'm not expecting a deliv…ry.." _arrggghhhh!_ " she stops "Oh my god!" She tries desperately to close the door. As she sees Reagan standing there.

He shoves the door hard to open it. She loses her balance and falls in the hallway. "Ms Lewis" he smiles "Hello again!"

"What the hell do you want?" She holds her side; the pain is back _Awww!_ she grimaces

"Get up!"

He grabs hold of her hair and pulls her up off of the floor _Aahhhhh! Aww!_ "Don't …please! "she holds her head, so it doesn't hurt so much "What do you want?"

"This!" he holds the flash drive in front of her. She frowns "I want to know what's on it" he has a gun and he forces her back through into the living area. She shakes her head now he's let go of her hair. She's holding her side and grimaces with the pain she grimaces

"Jason will be back soon!"

"And? that matters because .."

"I'm just saying, if you wanna get out of here alive, then I'd leave now if I was you"

"No if I want to live, then I need to know what's on this thing" he chucks it on the table "I want to know who's coming after me for it?"

"I'm confused why are you asking me?" She shakes her head "You worked for Reuben, I thought you knew what it was?"

"No, he never told me what was on it. Just told me it was important and paid me. It was simple. I did what he paid me to do" he takes a deep breath "but now when I tried to sell it, no one wants to touch it and I can't get it open. I need the password and Reuben said you could open it. Why is everyone so scared to handle it?"

"I don't know" she shakes her head "I guess who ever Reuben worked for is looking for it. They are some powerful people." she shrugs "You know Reuben, he may have thought of himself as being top of the food chain, but he wasn't. But don't ask me who they are because I don't know. All I know is they're dangerous" she gulps "That's the truth!"

 _Hmmm!_ Well, Reuben was convinced you could open it; he went to some extreme lengths to keep you alive. So, I'm also convinced you can. I want you to open it …NOW!"

She swallows hard "Trust me it won't help you, knowing what's on there, it won't save you. You wanna live, then my advice, just leave it here and forget about it, forever. Trust me it's not worth taking the money"

"No! No, you want me to think that, but whoever wants this, wants whats on it. So once I know that it will have some value" he smiles "and I want a piece of that. You're gonna help me get it!"

"Fine!" She sighs as he points the gun at her "If that's really what you want, money not peace of mind. Then fine have it"

For once Reagan seems to be on the back foot, he even looks worried and scared. He obviously didn't understand what he was getting in to. "Who did Reuben work for, you must know that"

"Trust me you really would be better not knowing. I told you I don't know who they are, not for sure"

"But you _can_ open it?"

"Yeah!" She swallows nervously and reluctantly nods "Yeah!" She calms her panicked breathing "You know I've already had people come here, looking for it, looking for you."

"When?"

"A couple of days ago"

"Just get it open then" he points the gun at her

"I need my laptop" she points to the doorway "it's in the kitchen"

"Fine get it!"

 _"Awww!"_ she holds her side again she closes her eyes in pain

"Look Don't be trying anything stupid!"

"I'm not. I've got a really bad pain." She thinks for a moment before she speaks, taking a deep breath "Look, please something you should know I'm... I'm pregnant so just give me a minute and I'll get the laptop!"

He frowns not sure if she telling the truth as she sets up on the table and plugs the file in. "I need to run some software, to open it. It will take some time" She takes a deep breath "Can I get a drink?" She's so nervous and a couple of tears leak from her eyes, running down her cheeks. She quickly wipes them away.

He falters for a moment, seeing her cry "Yeah sure!" he nods waving the gun, pushing her forward to the kitchen

"Thanks!" she nods " The um... the programme it's running" She goes to the kitchen and runs the tap. But instead of getting a glass of water, she opens the cupboard and takes the JD bottle out. Then she checks the doorway _Pheww!_ she lets out a long sigh, then she switches the tap off.

She lets out another long sigh, taking a glass out of the cupboard she pours a large measure of the JD into it. Reagan is at the doorway now. He takes her by surprise. Shit! she takes a deep breath "Do you want one?" she smiles as she holds the bottle up

"Yeah!" He nods. "why not. but um..." he frowns "are you even supposed to drink that, I mean if you are pregnant?"

She laughs, it relieves the tension "Really? Are you seriously asking me that, given the circumstances? she shakes her head still laughing. _Hmmm!_ "Well, okay your concern, is noted"

He smirks at her "I suppose you have a point" he turns and heads back to the laptop

"I'll get a glass" As she opens the cupboard door to take another glass out there's a loud bang from the other room. It's a gunshot.

"FUCK!" she drops the glass. Swallowing nervously she puts the bottle down. Her breathing slows to an almost stop. Very quietly and cautiously she goes to the doorway and there in the living room she can see Reagan's body on the floor. "What the hell?" as she looks towards the doorway "Oh my God! What's going on?"

"Well It's not like we need him, is it! We have all we need" Wade smiles at her

She stands frozen to the spot. She shakes her head "What the hell's going on? How did you know he was here?"

"I told you, we've been looking for him. Well, not him… that" he points to the laptop "It was his foolish mistake to come here!"

"You've been watching me?" she frowns

"Seriously Catherine! you're asking _me_ that?"

"So, now what?"

"Now? Now you open it for _me_ and then…. then, I'm gone! Well unless…" He smiles "well I got your message about my job offer."

She shakes her head slowly "That's it? You're gone, if I open it."

"That's it!" he takes a seat "Though do I have a feeling you wanted something else" he smiles "Look, why don't you get us that that drink. You look like you need it" He gets up and checks the laptop and as he does he kicks Reagan's body over, so he's on his front so they can't see his face.

Back in the kitchen she's trying to get her head around what's just happened. _SHIT!_  
He's right she does need that drink and she pours two, gulping one down first before she refills it. Then as she heads back to the living area she's stopped in her tracks by the aching pain in her side. She has to put the glasses down. _Awww! oh God!_

She leans forward resting her elbow on the work top. _Awww!_ She breathlessly rests her head in her hand while the pain subsides "Oh God _...Jeez!"_

Wade stands in the doorway "Is something wrong?"

"It just a pain" she shakes her head "I get them now and again" She takes a deep breath while it subsides "Just give me a minute"

He nods and goes back to the living room taking his drink with him. She puts both hands on the worktop and presses down as the wave of pain reaches its peak she tries to breathe through it. "oh... Sh..it! _Pheww!_ Eventually it calms down and disappears.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason pulls up in the yard. He has Clay, Sonny and Ray with him

"Just wait there. I'll just check she's alright, then I'll come back with you" he unlocks the front door "Why can't you just answer your damn phone!" He calls out as he comes through the door

"JASON!" she lets out a relieved sigh

Wade lets the gun drop to his side as Jason looks at them both "What's going on?"

"Jason it's fine, just stay calm." she puts her hand up, staring at him trying to reassure him, trying to make him stay calm. But now he sees Reagan's body on the floor

"What the _hell i_ s going on? Are you hurt?"

"Sit down Mr Hayes" Wade pulls the gun out and points it at him

"CJ?... What's going on here?"

"Jason, it's fine! Just sit down" she nods calmly. She leans forward against that pain again! _"oh!... SHIT!"_ she shakes her head trying to keep it to herself

Jason notices something is wrong "CJ... are you alright? You're in pain? You need to let her go!"

"NO! No, I'm fine, it's nothing I'm good" she struggling to contain it now, but she does.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Rays outside he looks at his watch "Whatever is he doing in there?" he sighs.

Sonny raises his eyes "I'd more ask what the hell's she been doing that's keeping him in there?" he laughs

"Oh, I'm gonna find him. I don't know, he's been ages."

Sonny looks at Clay who shakes his head "I think I go with your theory there, Sonny"

"Ten bucks says it's her causing some problem, that he's having to sort" Sonny laughs

"Hell, I'm not losing my money on that"

"Go see what she's been doing Ray!"

Ray sighs "If she has been up to something he'll be fuming!"

He gets to the door and he's about to knock but sees the doors still ajar. He can hear a voice that he doesn't recognize. _Something's off._ He pushes the door a little, to see if he can hear anything more. Then he stops as he sees the tall, skinny looking guy, pacing around _  
_

_Shit! What the hell's going on?_ He backs up quietly to the truck "Sonny we got a problem "

"Oh, now you surprise me, so what's she done now?"

"No! No not C.J. There's someone in the house" he gets on the phone "Eric, it's Ray. We have a problem at Jason's. Something's going on. I need you to send Trent and Brock. There's someone there with them. And I don't think it's good news"

"Hang on I'm putting you on speaker so the others can hear. Do we know who it might be?"

"No. Really tall. a skinny guy. No one I've ever seen before, oh and um...he's English, I mean his accent. Which is what concerns me"

Mandy's listening on the speaker "That can't be right?" She frowns "That sounds like Wade, the agency guy. He was here, when they released Reuben"

"So, what would he be doing at Jason's house"

"I don't know.

"Do you reckon it has something to do with C.J, or the Reuben thing? Look we're outside. I don't think he's aware we're here. How you want me to proceed"

"Just hold for now Ray. Let get an up to date sitrep, see what intel, Mandy can pull"

"Okay, just makes sure Trent and Brock are on way, and tell them to bring our gear"

"Yeah they're already on route"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Where's J.C?" Jason's concerned

"It's okay, he's okay. He went with Linda. He's fine" She has a lump in her throat "Look Wade, just let Jason go and I will open the file for you" She looks at him "I promise"

"NO! I don't think so. How about instead I use him, to make sure you do open the file I threaten to kill him, if you don't Maybe that will get me a quicker outcome, yes."

"Okay!" she nods. She also knows that Wade will not mess around with his threats "Okay... I'm doing it" she wipes the tear off her face as she starts to type the start programme to get it to run "So, what you're going to kill us after this is done?" she bites her lip

"That wasn't my intention, unless you make me. Just don't do anything stupid and you'll both be fine. Oh, and by the way that offer is still there" he smiles "Come back to Washington, take the job. I mean you did want it, didn't you?"

"She's not taking any job you offer; she's having a baby! My baby!"

" _Baby?"_ Wade looks at her with a frown

"Yeah, she's pregnant, oh did she not tell you?"

"Jason don't!"

"Really?" Wade laughs "Oh, dear Catherine, you do like to make things difficult for yourself. You don't change"

"Don't laugh at me" she's angry. She closes her eyes; the pain is back "This needs five minutes. Can I get a drink of water"?

Wade nods "Why not!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She's in the kitchen and she keeps an eye on the doorway as she picks up the JD bottle back up and pours another drink "Oh man!" she takes as bigger drink of it as she can. Then there's a ping. It's the file finishing its upload "The file .. Shit!"

She finishes the drink " _urggghh! … god damn_ " she coughs as she knocks it back too quick _Urggghh!_ she closes her eyes wondering why she's doing this to herself it's not as if she's even enjoying it.

She runs a glass of water which she takes with back to the living room with her "It's done just need the passwords input" she looks at him as she drinks the water. She doesn't take her eyes off him. She's wondering what will happen when she opens this file.

Jason shakes his head "CJ... don't do it"

She looks back at him "I have to" she stops to think "Look, let Jason go, please!" she wants to cry "Please?" She's worrying about Jason, the drink and trying to hide the pain she's in.. Her hands are shaking as puts them on the keyboard and starts to type the passwords _. SHIT!_

"C.J are you alright?" Jason's concerned now she looks awful the color has left her face

As she's ready to input the last password, she takes her hands off away from the keyboard . She gulps and stands up

"SIT DOWN! and finish it" Wade indicates with the gun

"I need to use the bathroom, please.." she begs "I'm gonna be sick" she reaches and holds her hand in front of her mouth. Wade nods he looks at her, he can see that she does actually look really unwell

"Go!... just don't try anything stupid"

Jason frowns, he ignores Wade and stands up "C.J what's wrong? Are you okay?"

"Sit down Mr Hayes" Wade points the gun at him

"It's okay, I feel sick thats all" She can hardly speak, placing her hand to her mouth she hurriedly heads to the bathroom closing the door behind her.

Just in time she lifts the lid to the toilet and throws up. She doesn't know if it's the drink, that she gulped down too quickly, or something else

"What the hell?" _Urggghh!_ she sits on the floor. Her head is spinning, and she leans back allowing the feeling to pass. She gets up to wash her face _"Oh god!"_

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Wade looks at the computer and the files that are partially open. He can see the final password entry waiting. He smiles at Jason, but he doesn't say a word.

Jason sits staring at him looking at him "You know, give me one chance, and I'm gonna kill you. Know that!"

"I'm sure you'll try Mr Hayes" he laughs "A lot a of people have!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She looks in the mirror the pain is back. She doubles over trying to ease it but it's excruciating now. She grips her knees together trying to work through it, but it won't stop. She puts her hands between her thighs, hoping to ease it "Oh god!... Oh please!" _Arrrghhh!_ "Please just stop."

She pulls her hands away and puts one on her hip rubbing her side where it hurts. As she looks at her other hand, it's shaking and now she can see the blood "Oh shit! Oh .. no!"

Taking short sharp breathes she comes over really faint, grabbing at the shower curtain, trying to steady herself but she can't and collapses to the floor. Knocking all the toiletry bottles over as she goes down, they make a loud clattering noise

"Oh god! … help me!" She cries out as she lands on the cold tiles _Arrrrrgghhhh!_ She's sobbing as a wave of pain washes over her and she leans her head back against the wall.

Jason and Wade turn towards the noise from the bathroom "What the hell was that?" Jason frowns worried

Wade too frowns and as he's distracted by the noise, looking towards the bathroom and as he does Jason sees his opportunity. He makes his move, driving himself forward onto Wade headfirst. Taking him off balance and pushing him over.

There's a loud _crack_ and the gun goes off with an ear-splitting bang.

"What the hell .." Sonny looks at Ray and Spenser "That was a gunshot! Ray we need to get in there!"


	52. Chapter 52

**Chapter 52: How's she doing?**

"You set to go?"

"Yeah" Sonny nods, clicking the safety from his weapon

"On three" Ray holds up his fingers and silently counts down " three….two …one..execute!" He pushes the door very gently and they enter the doorway, Moving quickly and silently. Sonny checks, darting his head around checking the living room. He can see Jason on the floor grappling with someone "Jace!"

As he calls out Jason looks up startled, giving Wade the opportunity to throw his fist hard into his face. It sends him reeling backwards as Wade makes a grab for the gun.

Two gunshots ring out.

Then in the slow-moving seconds after Wade falls violently backwards, crashing into the dresser behind. Everything in the room goes silent for a few moments and Ray assess the situation.

There's blood everywhere, against the dresser, the table and over the floor. Wade's body drops in a heap. Sonny's lethal head shot killing him outright. Jason falls crashing in the other direction and Sonny rushes to his aid

"Jace!... Jason!" Ray jumps over the couch to get to him "Sonny, get ASAP" he tries to sit Jason up "Jace man talk to me .. you okay?" Jason nods. Grimacing he holds his blood-soaked side. Ray frowns pulling his shirt up "Let me look" he sighs "Shit!... Sonny grab me a towel or something to put on this we need to put pressure on the wound" As sonny hands him a cloth from the kitchen where he's checking he presses it on "Okay, hold that… just keep the pressure on it. I'll get some kit from the truck"

Clay's inside, checking Wades body. He nods to Sonny "He's dead!"

He and Sonny look around at the door as Trent arrives, placing his bag down he starts to triage the situation "Anyone called an ambulance"

Clay nods "I called it in Davis is sorting it "

 _Aahhhhh!._.. Fuck! "That hurts!" Jason grimaces as Trent move the cloth, checking the wound. His hands covered in blood. Ray's beside him helping administer treatment  
"Hold in there we just need to stop the bleeding" As Trent checks "I don't think it's too serious the bullets just grazed your side. It's made a bit of a mess, but I don't think there's any serious damage"

"It might not be serious but sure as hell hurts" Jason frowns, leaning back taking deep breaths to counter the pain

"Okay... just stay still. I'll get this bleed under control"

Clay looks around seeing Reagan's body near the kitchen doorway "What the hell happened here and um… where's CJ?" he looks up staring at Jason there's a sudden air of concern.

Ray shrugs his shoulders; Sonny frowns they now realize that no one's seen her since they arrived in the house.

"The bathroom!" Jason points "She went to bathroom. She wasn't well"

"Clay. You wanna check on her?" Ray frowns concerned and Clay nods, heading into the bathroom "Sonny, give him a hand" he's concerned that despite the noises and the gunshots she hasn't surfaced.

Clay quietly opens the bathroom door. He's stopped in his tracks seeing her body on the floor, collapsed between the toilet and the shower. He holds his breath, his mind thinking the worst until as he calls her name she opens her eyes. "CJ you okay? Are you hurt?" 

Because she's only wearing the grey tee-shirt of Jason's he can see her bare legs, they appear to be covered in blood and there's some on the floor where she's moved trying to stand up. Confused he places his weapon down and rushes to her side "What's happened?"

She's shaking, sweating the color drained from her face so weak that she's hardly able to speak. "Clay..." she puts her hand up towards him, grabbing at his uniform _"Oh god! Help me!"_ She screws up her face up as the pain comes again "I think. ..it's um…the.." she can't get the words out the pain making her breathless "oh god! It hurts" _Arrrrghhh!_  
It's making her feel faint and she collapses back, closing her eyes.

"Hey c'mon, stay with me" he takes hold of her hand trying to reassure and comfort her "I'm gonna get you some help"

She's laying in a really awkward position so it's hard for him to get to get near to her. She's shaking her head, trying to talk to him "There's something wrong. Clay, I think it's the baby!" she closes her eyes "Oh god! This is my fault" she actually starts to sob with the pain "I should have listened. I should've stopped drinking" she can't get her breath again _arrrrgghh!_ "Clay, please help me!" her hand grips at her side as the wave of pain comes again " _Oh god!_ "

"Okay.." Clay's not entirely sure what to do "Just stay calm. You hold on. I'll get Trent" he looks around behind him as Sonny opens the door.

Shit! "What the hell's happened here man?" he frowns, noticing the blood on her legs and floor. He watches as laying there her body's shaking

"I don't know.." Clay swallows hard "Sonny she needs a medic. Get Trent, like now!"

"Yeah sure!" he stares for a moment longer

Clay panics as her head collapses back on the floor and she now wont respond "I think she's gone into shock! We need to move her, out of here, give us more room"

Unsure if she can hear him or not Sonny speaks "CJ, listen we're gonna move you" he's cool and calm "We gonna make you more comfortable. CJ, can you hear me?" he frowns then looks at Clay "She's not good, we need to move her now!"

Drifting in and out consciousness, she manages to understand enough to nod. Clay's staring at the blood on her legs and Sonny words are lost in the fog of his head. "Clay!..Hey! Hey Spenser, listen up!" Sonny snaps his fingers bringing Clay's thoughts back to the room! "You get her legs"

Because of the position she's in it's making it hard to get hold of her, but Sonny manages to get his hands under her. "Okay lift!"

"Careful! Watch her head on the door" Clay frowns as they carry her out to the floor of the living room

Trent has Jason sitting up they have his bleeding under control. The stray bullet has clipped his side, ripping the flesh. There was a lot of blood but not much physical damage.

"Ray clear some space" Clay gestures towards the rug area and Ray tips the table over, moving it away as they lay her flat in the middle of the floor.

Trent's finishing dressing the wound on Jason "I'll be with her now! Ray can you get that fluid out that bag. She's gonna need some by the looks of her"

"What happened? Is she alright?" Jason grimaces as he tries to get up to see her

"Just keep still" Trent pushes him down " We got this!"

"But is she alright? What wrong with her?"

They all look around at each other. Clay frowns hesitantly "She's not good, I don't know what's happened but she's bleeding. My guess … "he looks at Ray and he frowns hard "I think it might be the baby!"

Shit! Jason closes his eyes taking a deep breath in "She's gonna be alright though?" he frowns "CJ!...CJ, can you hear me? " he calls to her "Are you okay?"

She might be able to hear him but she's not listening. Shaking from the pain, she keeps her eyes closed

The guys are startled by the sudden appearance in the doorway of Blackburn and Mandy. They're flanked by two guys in suits

"What's going?" Ray frowns, he's a little concerned by the strangers

"Who the hell are they and where's that ambulance" Jason looks to Eric for answers

"I was gonna ask the same thing, what the hell happened here? Jason you okay?"

"Yeah!" Jason grimaces at the pain "Yeah, I'm good, don't worry about me."

Trent starts to unpack some more medical items from his bag "Jace how you doing?" he looks up checking

"Yeah I'm fine ...don't worry about me. How's she doing?" Again, he tries to get up "Help me up. I need to see her!"

"Can you stay still?

"Just get me over there, I need to see her"

She's conscious again, her stomach cramping up "Oh my god!" she sobs, taking deep breaths

Trent takes a look a look at her, checking her pulse he puts his hand to her head "She's way too hot! Can we get some cold, wet flannels? We need try and bring this temperature down

Everyone's looking at each other. They all frown, as they try to work out who the guys with Mandy are. Her and them gathered over the laptop on the desk, Mandy's arguing with them.

"You okay?" Mandy sighs as she looks at Jason "Look, I'm really sorry to ask this right now.." She checks behind her the suits are staring, arms folded waiting. " but um…well…Oh god I can't believe I'm going to have to ask this right now, but did she tell any of you the codes, for the laptop, for the file on it? Jason?.. ..Clay?"

"What the hell!" he frowns angry "Mandy can you see whats going on here? What's the matter with you? She could be dying on the floor and you're worried about codes!?"

"Look I said I'm sorry, but I'm under pressure here. Either I ask or they do and trust me they are not messing around!"

"So, who the hell are these guys? I think you need to ask them to leave?" Jason glares at her

"I'm sorry, Jason. I can't do that. I have no authority here. They've only let me speak to you because I know you"

As she looks around blue suit is beside her "So, is she able to talk?"

"Look…." Mandy turns to stare at him "I don't think this is an appropriate time, do you?"

The guy smiles, chewing his gum, "We appreciate that but Ms Ellis, it's imperative that we know. We _need_ that code!"

He looks down at Trent who's still monitoring CJ "Hey you! She awake enough for questions?"

"Are you for real?" Jason forces himself to his feet. Grabbing at his gunshot wound on his side. He's fuming and he finds the strength to grab the suit by the collar "What the hell do you think you're doing talking to my team like that!" He shoves him hard in the chest "You need to back the hell off!"

Blue suit holds his nerve, unfazed by Jason's aggression. He stands firm as Jason pushes him again. Now he has Jason's blood all over his white shirt "Who the hell _are y_ ou anyway? "

"Master Chief Hayes" he laughs "I'm sorry maybe I should be questioning you. I mean you have one of our Agents dead in your house and a classified government file on your laptop . It's us that needs to know what's happened"

"You need to back off, that's what you need to do. You don't go near her, understand me!"

"Jason! Jace brother don't do this!" Ray pulls him away. He's not sure who these guys are but his gut feeling is they are important and that Jason is not helping himself " Sit down" He frowns, he can see the blood coming through the dressing "You're not doing yourself any favors here, brother"

"Can she talk or not?" The suit makes his presence felt over Trent and Sonny steps between them. Trent shakes his head

"No, she's unconscious!"

"Damn it!" The guy persists "Ms Lewis... Ms Lewis! Ms Lewis, I need the code, for this file!"

Sonny pushes him back "What the hell were you just told!" he stares at him hard "Now back the fuck up and get outta here before I put you out! I make myself clear?"

"Mandy what the hell is going on ?" Jason looks at her "You need to sort this!"

"You're right, look this is not appropriate right now. I'm sure as soon as she's able to answer your questions she will" she looks at the other guy trying to get them to back off

"Agent Ellis, I'm sure you are aware why we need to ask _now_? While we're still able" He looks at her "if she dies …"

"Okay…." Mandy frowns at him "Look just wait here" he looks at the guy in front of Sonny as the other suit calls him. They turn their back and gather around the laptop, talking.

"What the hell they are doing with that laptop? What the fuck is going on Mandy!"

"I'm sorry Jason, it's out of my hands"

They are distracted from their argument as Trent turns to the room "This is not good! I can't get her temperature down" he frowns "We need that ambulance ASAP "

Jason scrambles across the floor, laying her head in his lap "CJ just hold on, please don't you dare die on me. Not now!" She's pale and weak and he's worried "God dammit where is that medical assistance"

"Jason let me look at that" Trent frowns the dressing on his side is wet with red blood and getting worse "You need to keep still"

"Don't worry about me just make her right!"

Sonny looks up "Ambulance is here "

"Thank god! You hear that? CJ, you're gonna be alright now just hold on. Just a bit longer."

Trent and Clay look at each other. Clay shakes his head he's not sure she'll make it Shit! he rub his head. Trent takes a long breath in

"Okay, so which patient we are looking at first?" The paramedics look at Trent. They all look at Jason the dressing on his side covered in red blood

"Her …" Jason points " She needs to be seen first. I'm fine"

All the color has drained from her face and her breathing is slow. Ray sits back and shakes his head at Clay "This is not good"

"Jace, lets' get you out the way, just while they take a look at her"

"Yeah, let's go in the kitchen. I need to change the dressing on that and clean up" Trent looks at Ray, they both know they really want him out the way in case things deteriorate . Neither are sure how he's gonna react if the worst happens to her.

Jason runs the tap, getting himself some water "Here let me do that. Just sit down" Ray takes the glass off him "Just relax a minute."

"Yeah Ray's right, relax and let me take a look" Trent has a clean dressing ready but Jason's not listening he stands in the doorway. Watching the medics as they deal with C.J.

He's concerned when they fix an oxygen mask over her face and some drips in her arm. He's biting his lip anxiously. He exchanges glances with Clay who's standing in the corner of the living room watching. His side really hurts but he won't let on. Living with the ache as he focuses on CJ

Despite his protests and the awkward position, he's standing, Trent starts to re dress the wound. As Jason turns to look at Ray his eye is drawn to the bottle on the worktop. He didn't notice it before but now the JD bottle gets his attention.

" _Oh My God!_ You stupid…." And angrily his hand lashes out sweeping the glass from the side he smashes against the floor.

"Woah! Jason man, c'mon you need to chill out"

"What the hell was she thinking, Trent?"

"I know, I know … "he stops what he's doing and looks Jason in the eye "Jason, she's not been in a good place. You know she has a problem. I told you she wasn't in a good place lately"

"I thought she had this in control" Jason shakes his head, sighing "Damn it I didn't think I need to … to keep watching her. You don't think she wanted this baby, is that why she did it? "

"Hey man I'm not saying. No, I think she wanted this baby it just that … being honest, maybe telling everyone didn't help. I think she was so mixed up she doesn't know what she's doing. Its an illness, she can't stop."

"I was stupid telling everyone. I should have waited like she asked. But.. I thought it was a good thing. Did she say something to you? Trent?" he frowns "Well did she?

"No! No, she didn't say anything to me I just realized she was struggling and that she was probably still drinking… she wouldn't listen to me"

"She could've got help. She could have stopped drinking! God dammit she should have stopped; she had the baby to think of. " he points at the smashed JD bottle "She did this!"

"This hasn't been easy for her Jason." Ray thinks for minute "Look man, you're seriously gonna have to consider what you do now. You're gonna have to think about sending her away, somewhere that can help her. You have no choice, for you and the kids"

"How the hell can I do that Ray?" he puts his hand on his side the blood is coming through the dressing again

"Jace, let Trent look at that!" Ray frowns worried about the blood "Let's get this situation under control and them you can think about what you need to do" he sighs "You don't need to make any decisions right now"

"It'll kill her Ray. If I send her back to rehab. You know she never forgave her father, she hated him for that"

"She's gonna end up dead if you don't though!" Ray sighs " This can't carry on!"  
he nods towards the living room "C'mon let's get you sorted and see how she's doing!"

o-o-o-o-o-o

As they head back into the living room. Clay's shaking his head at them. He's wiping his face and rubbing his hair _Fuck!_ He frowns as he paces around.

"What the hell's going on?"

Clay takes a deep breath "It's not looking good man!" he looks at them "I'm sorry. Oh jeez."  
He puts his hands on his hips biting his cheek he holds in his emotions "Um.. they um… they think she may have lost the baby" he swallows the lump he has in his throat "They think she has an infection"

"Hence why I couldn't get her temperature down" Trent frowns

"Yeh, it's causing extra complications. That's why she's bleeding. They're doing what they can, but they don't think they can save it"

"How bad is it?" Ray looks between Jason and Clay's watching Jason's reaction

The paramedic looks around at Ray "if we can't stabilize her then… we're doing everything we can."

Shit! Jason takes a deep breath putting his head in his hands Fuck! "You know, she said she didn't feel well before I left, I just thought…..I thought she'd be okay, God! I shouldn't have left; I should have got her checked out" he closes his eyes "This is my fault. I shouldn't have left!"

"Hey Jace, man you couldn't know this was gonna happen. Look, they're doing everything they can. She's still holding in there. You know she's a tough, right? Hell, I bet she's just hanging in there to piss me off" Sonny laughs trying to break the tension

"Yeah c'mon on let's get you to the hospital that wound of yours needs sorting" Trent steps in "They're doing what they can" he tries to reassure him "You want us to take you or you wanna go with her?"

"I'll go with her!" Jason frowns "HEY! What the hell are you doing?" he pushes the guy in the suit who's now leaning over the medics asking questions "I said what the hell are you doing? Who the hell are you"?

"They something to do with Mandy, they want a code, for the laptop "Clay frowns

"Hey you! I said get away from her" Jason can feel his temper bubbling

"I'm sorry Mr Hayes, but we need to speak with her."

"Well you'll have to wait, for god sake can't you see what's going on?"

"Yes, I can and that's why I need to get this code. In case…" He pauses "..in case she doesn't make it"

"What!" Jason loses can't control it now his anger boils to the surface and he thumps the suit guy full in the face knocking him backwards

"Master Chief !" Blackburn steps between them pushing Jason away, Sonny and Ray grabbing hold of him "Step away !" Jason ignores him and steps forward again with his fist up ready "JASON, I said step away that's an order!"

"I'll have you reported for this" the suit wipes the blood off his nose "You won't have a career after this!"

"You do that!"

"Jace c'mon man" Ray pulls him away "He's not worth it!"

"Let me go!" Jason shakes his head and pulls away "Ray, I'm cool. Just let me go!" _Shit!_ Jason rubs his head and leans against the wall. He looks at the chaos in the house. The suits are still hovering around the paramedics

Mandy steps over and puts her hand on Jason's arm "You okay?"

He shakes his head "Who the hell are these guys, Mandy? What the hell is going on?"

"Look Jason I'm sorry" she smiles apologetically "they're just doing their jobs. I know I don't like it any more than you!" she gives him a sympathetic look and touches his arm again "Jason if there's anything I can do then you know where I am"

"Yeah" but he brushes her off "Yeah, just doing their jobs?!" He sneers "Can you actually see what's going on here, Mandy? She's losing my baby and you want some code of a computer"

"I know and Jason I am sorry but…" she gulps "this is serious." She looks him full in the face now "they need to open that file Jason. It's really important. There are things of national security contained on it"

"NO!No, they need to stay the hell away for her is what they need to do!" he steps forward again

"JACE!" Ray grabs him "just cool it man! This isn't doing anyone any good" Ray stares hard at Mandy and she nods then has a word with the suit guys

"Look Jace," Ray frowns "You go, I'll stay and find out what's going, get cleaned up or do you need me to come with you?" he's gives a worried frown "Hey man you are good right?"

"Yeah I'm good!" he holds his side, his face contorted in pain

"Get that looked at" Ray looks around to Sonny and Clay "Get them to the hospital"

Jason steps closer to where the medics are clearing up preparing to move her He's so angry with her but so worried as well "CJ c'mon … please " he holds her hand and kisses it "I'm so sorry. I should have been here"

One of the paramedics looks up "Right she's stable enough now. We're ready to move her. Looks like you need to come to" as he looks up at Jason's blood-soaked dressing

"How's she doing? Honestly"

"Honestly?" He shakes his head "She's not in great shape but she's holding her own for now"

 _Shit!_ He rubs his head "and um…what about the baby"

"Look we'll know more when we get to the hospital. They'll probably take her straight to surgery though"

With Clay and Ray's help they lift her to the gurney and as they move the suits again stop them and the questioning begins again. She briefly open her eyes, shaking her head, confused by their continuing questions "Hey you!" Clay glares pushing the guy way "You were told get away"

"We okay here Blondie?" Sonny steps up

"Yeah! Yeah. We're good. He just needs to get the hell away from her"

Sonny frowns as he leans forward. The suit guy takes a step back "Hey, you heard him. He told ya, get the fuck away, Now! …Go!" He stares long and hard at him "before I make you!"

As the ambulance and the truck pull away Ray turns to Blackburn whose stayed behind with him. They looks at the chaotic scene in the living room. Ray rub his tired face letting out a long sigh _SHIT!_ "What a mess!"


	53. Chapter 53

**No, It can't be!**

Two days later 

"You good, man?" Ray smiles as he places the coffee beside Jason's hospital bed

"Yeah, yeah I'm good" There pain is on and off but at least he's up on his feet. Both he and Ray sit, they're watching her sleep, the oxygen mask on and her chest heaving up and down

"So, you been here all night?"

"Yeah" Jason nods "Didn't wanna leave just in case.. .you know."

"Yeah, I know brother but maybe you should go home, get some rest" he puts his hand on Jason's shoulder "She looks brighter today."

"Oh god Ray...you know I didn't think she was gonna make it in the night" He shakes his head, placing the coffee down. He gets up from his seat and starts to pace around the room, it helps with the ache in his hip

"You okay?" Ray nods towards him indicating "You got some pain?"

"No... maybe, a little. Nothing I can't handle"

"So, did she come around yet"

"Yeah for a short while. They have her drugged up so she's really drowsy. Couldn't speak much, I think, if you ask me, it was too much"

"I'm sure they know what they're doing brother " Ray coughs "You got any more details about the um.. baby yet?" he frowns

"Well they told her" Jason sighs "I'm not sure she took it in? Hell Ray, don't think I took it in. They gonna take her for another scan later, just to check things" He sits in the high back chair, head in hands

"Jace, c'mon man, you need to get some sleep. Come back to ours and rest. Don't go to the house they're still cleaning up there"

Jason sits quiet contemplating everything "Ray, what am I gonna do?"

"Oh man, I wish I knew " Ray sighs, shaking his head "It's your call Jace but you know what I think. I can't say any different"

"Dammit Ray!" he closes his eyes "She had it all going right so why can't she stop with the drinking?" _Shit!_ he shakes his head in despair

"Listen Jace, if not for you then do it for Jaycee. Man, you can't have her around him, not while she's like this. She's not gonna change, I wish I could say she will, but not without help. Hell, even with help it's gonna be hard"

Jason's. scratches the stubble on his chin "I don't know Ray, just feels ...feels like I'm giving up on her"

"Hey brother, you've given her so many chances." He frowns "You just need to do this. You know it's the right thing"

 _"SHIT!"_ Jason knows Rays talking sense it just doesn't make the decision any easier

Clay comes to the door, Sonny following behind. He hesitates a moment, watching C.J just lying there "Hey, how's it going?"

Ray and Jason nod acknowledging their presence "She's holding her own, but she not out the woods yet"

Clay sniffs. He doesn't want to show any sign of emotions "So, what's the plan now?"

Ray raises his eyebrow "Up to you Jace"

"You gonna send her away?" Clay frowns, chewing his gum he shows no emotion

"I don't know!" Jason shakes his head "I really don't know" he gets up, leaning over he kisses her cheek then turns to leave "I need some air"

Sonny and Ray exchange concerned looks "Hey look man, she's not going anywhere right now so how about we go grab a beer. We all deserve some downtime I think "

"Yeah you're right Sonny, a beer would be good right now"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

 ** _The very next day_**

"Hey!" Jason's standing beside her hospital bed as slowly, she opens her eyes. She's watching him standing there, arms folded looming large over the bed.

"Hey!" she gives him a really tired smile, hardly able to keep her eyes open the drugs still having an effect "I'm sorry. Jason come here" she watches him, standing there shaking his head "Hey, what's wrong?"

"I'm sorry alright" he sighs regretfully "C.J, this can't go on" he runs his hand through his hair, hating that he's going to be so harsh right now but she's left him nowhere to go and after a long sleepless night he's made a decision "I gotta put JC and me first right now"

"What? What does that mean" in her tiredness she can't understand "Jason what are you saying?"

"I've um..." He closes his eyes; he can't look at her "Ive made arrangements" he bites his lip pausing. "for when you're ready to leave here. To get you some help, for the drinking."

"No wait, what? Hang on, hold up. Jason what are you saying? What help?" she's finding it so hard to make her mind understand "No!...No, wait. Jason, I wanna come home, be with you and JC" she shakes her head "Oh God no, Jason not that?" a sudden realization comes over her of what he's planning to do

He can't look at her and walks away from the bed. He has his back to her "I'm sorry but you can't come back to the house, to us. That's not gonna happen now. I told you I have to put us first"

She swallows hard her mouth dry from where she had the tube in her throat, she's finding it hard to speak "No Jason! Please, don't do this" she begs him, trying to sit up. The baby... "Look I'll stop. I will. After what's happened I know I have to. Please Jason, please one more chance? I'll put it right, I promise"

He shakes his head and turns to look at her "I'm sorry CJ you've promised this all before, too many times. It's gone too far now. This is best for everyone. It's best for our son"

"No! Wait! Wait, you can't stop me seeing J.C"

He bites his lip trying to hold his emotions "Yeah, yeah I can"

"No!Jason don't do this please?!" she starts to sob "PLEASE! I will get control of it, I can!"

"No, you won't and that's the problem, you can't. Not without help" his tone softens, and he bites his lip, thinking before he speaks "Dammit C.J you've left me no choice."

"Why? Why are you doing this? Oh, I know, it's your mother. She put this in your head."

"No! You did this. No one else. Look can't you see, CJ you _need_ help!"

She lays back running her hand through her hair sucking back her tears "Please Jason, I'm begging you. I hate it there, don't do this to me!" she pleads

He waivers for just a second then gathers his emotions. Walking to the side of the bed he kisses her forehead "I am sorry but it's for the best"

"Jason don't go!" she holds her breath holding back her pain "I want to see my son. At least let me see him, first"

It's then Linda appears at the doorway, holding JC. She hands him to Jason. CJ frowns, her eyes well with hot tears "Oh god! You brought him here?" she's in disbelief she thought asking that was going to buy her some time "You planned this. I told you she made you do this, I knew it!"

"No, I just thought you should see him before we leave" he sits him on the bed beside her "I owe you that at least"

"Oh god!" she shakes her head she realises he's really serious, he's going to send her to rehab. She watches him standing there "I hate you for this. I'll never forgive you!" She cries as she kisses JC, holding him as much as she can with all the drips in her arm. Then Jason picks him up and walks to the door with him "Jason, please!" She cries. "Please, come back!" she cries out but a he says how sorry he is for one last time he then disappears from the doorway.

Gone. She lays back pulling at her hair in frustration as she continues to cry "NO! NO! Please, don't do this to me!"

He falters for a moment in the corridor as he hears her cries, but Linda puts her hand on his arm, reassuring him " Son, you're doing the right thing"

"I hope to god you're right. Because it doesn't feel like the right thing"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o**

"Hey, you"

She opens her eyes from a deep sleep to find Clay's sitting in the chair. "Heyyy!" she smiles, groaning in pain as she moves position _Mmmm!_ she still has as dull ache in her stomach "How long have you been there?" she looks around "And where's Jason? Has he been back?"

Clay shrugs and just shakes his head and she smiles again "It's okay. I know he's not speaking to me. I get it!" she slowly nods in acceptance "Did he tell you, he wants to send me away"  
she looks at him but he doesn't react and then she laughs "Of course he did!" she sighs "Look, just tell him I need to speak to him. I know he needs some time to come around, change his mind but if he won't even speak to me. Then I can't put it right. Please Clay just get him to speak to me"

"I don't think he's gonna come around this time CJ, but then I think you know that" he sighs and smiles regretfully as he watches her "Look, maybe it's for the best, that you get some help! Get better." he grins trying to reassure her "But perhaps you don't have to do it on your own. maybe...maybe I could um... give you some support, I don't know.."

"I can't go back to rehab Clay" She shakes her head "Please, you have to speak to him. Make hi understand!"

Clay closes his eyes he can't look at her "You know I can't go against him. I'm sorry but I think he's right, it might be for the best"

"No! No, it's not. Please, just talk to him. I can get sober without going back there" she swallows, wiping her nose on her hand. Trying desperately to hold back her tears. They both look up as Davis knocks softly at the door.

"Oh hey," Davis frowns, she turns around and looks behind her to Sonny who's with her.

"Hey Blondie, what you doin here?" it concerns Sonny to see Clay sitting there. He wanted him to stay away.

Clay nods acknowledging them both "Lisa, Sonny, I just dropped by, see how she was. If she needed anything"

"Oh okay" Sonny looks at Lisa and frowns. She knows Sonny really hoped Clay would stay away "So how are things?"

"Not too bad I don't think. You're doing good aren't you? " Clay frowns as he and CJ exchange looks. She nods, rubbing her hand at the ache in her head

"Hey poster boy, what you say get us all some coffee, while Lisa sorts this _girl_ stuff out" He holds up the bag of clothes and toiletries that CJ asked Davis to bring.

"Um...yeah sure. You all want coffee? C.J, how about you, Coffee?" He gets up and goes to the door

"I'm good with this water thanks" C.J smiles

"okay, I'll be back in just a minute "

"Um right..."Lisa frowns nervously " I think I got everything you had on the list that you gave nurse. If there's anything I missed just get them to let me know"

"Thanks, I appreciate you doing this. I would have asked Jason but um..." she shrugs "he seems to be avoiding me"

Davis looks at Sonny CJ reluctantly nods her head. Realising they all know Jason is staying away "Lisa, did you um... get the wash bag, from Jason's that I asked for?"

"Yeah...yeah it was where you said it was the dresser drawer" she nods "and some clean underwear, some clothes, just a random selection. Didn't know what you needed. As I said if you want anything else just get them to let me know"

"Yeah thanks. Look leave the bag on there" she points to the chair by the bed "Thanks again Did um... Jason say if he's coming back today?" her lip quivers

Davis looks at Sonny she's not sure how to reply. She coughs before speaking "No , he didn't say anything about coming back. But I don't know for sure, I didn't really get chance to talk to him."

"Okay!" she laughs "Its fine, you don't have to make excuses I know he's avoiding me. Could you um ...just give him a message, when you see him. Just tell him I'm sorry, and I wanna sort it out, but I do get why he's done this and that I don't blame him" she swallows back her tears and rubs her head

"Um... sure" Davis coughs again "Look I know it's not a good time but those agency guys, they're here again and they still wanna speak to you. What do you want me to tell them"?

"Okay... " She nods "Can you tell them I'm sleeping, or something? Put them off for a while"

"Yeah sure I can try, be right back" she turns to Sonny and smiles

"Sure thing" he winks at her. "You know she didn't have to go to all this trouble, so I hope you appreciates it" Sonny looks around the room and then closes the door. He stands at the side of her bed "So how are you doing? You really doin okay?"

She laughs "What is it Sonny?" She laughs looking him in the face "Since when do you do concern for me? Hmmm what is it? There must be something?"

" Yeah you're right. Truth is I couldn't give a damn how you are!"

"Well at least you're honest!" she laughs "One thing I did like about you, your honesty"

"Okay so let's cut the crap before golden boy comes back!" he bites his lip "Now he's gonna ask you something and I know it. Cos I guessed your lil secret. About the baby. Now I don't care what the hell the truth is, but you just tell him No!"

"What?" she frowns, scoffing a laugh at his accusation

"Oh, c'mon C.J" he laughs "You know what I'm talking about! _Hell,_ you didn't keep your panties on long enough to really know that baby was Jason's." he gives her a look of contempt

She sneers at him now as he's making her angry "Go to hell Sonny!"

"What you don't like the truth? " he smiles "I don't care about that. But I do care about Clay. So, don't mess with that boys' head again. Look..." he sighs "It won't help anyone now, not now you lost the baby. So, you just tell him no, it wasn't his. You understand me. This is for Clay. Not your games with Jason"

She laughs and shaking her head "So…if I do this for you then I want you do something for me?"

"Such as?" he frowns not that he has any intention of helping her, but he listens

"Speak to Jason, get him to call this rehab thing off or at least just... just come see me. I can't go there Sonny" she shakes her head

"Oh stop!" Sonny laughs " You'll have me feelin all sorry for you. Truth is... Jason's not gonna forgive you for this, not this time. So, you can whine all you like but you're gonna have to pay for this mistake. Oh hell, do yourself a favor CJ, take wass on offer and get yourself right. Might do you some good. What _I'm saying_ is don't make Clay pay for your mistake as well" He stares at her, long and hard until she looks away. She takes a deep and sighs eventually she reluctantly nods her head. "Good! Glad we got an understanding. I don't want things getting any uglier than they need to be"

"Um... 'm sorry but they wouldn't take no for an answer" Davis is at the door, flanked by two men in suits

CJ looks up she takes a deep breath "It's okay, don't worry. It's probably time I got his done. Look can you just give me a minute please?"

She looks at Sonny and nods "Okay well, we'll leave you to it then but remember what I said. This could get real nasty if not" he tips his hat at her and then as he and Davis go to leave, Clay arrives back with the coffee. Sonny takes his out of his hand "thanks for this, I'll take it with me. You wanna lift back with us?"

"Um... No, no I'm good" he stands the other two coffees on the side" I brought you one just in case" he smiles as she smiles apprehensively back at him "Look I'll catch up with you guys in a bit"

"Yeah don't be too long there" Sonny keeps looking at C.J as they walk away

"So, what's going on with these guys" he nods at the suited guys outside the door " You want me to stay?"

"No! No, it's okay! I can handle them, thanks"

"Okay well... I'll speak to you later?"

"Yeah sure" she smiles "Clay ...wait! Look um... I'm sorry alright?!" she smiles "Are we good?"

"Yeah! Yeah we're good!" he comes back, kissing her on the forehead. She closes her eyes to rest. As Clay gets to the doorway he stops. He swallows nervously, thinking then he speaks "Look um.. CJ there's something I need to know. I'm just gonna ask it. Was that baby, was it mine?"

"No!" she stops him before he can say anymore. Holding back tears her lip quivers "NO! it wasn't" she shakes her head

"Okay! " he nods, watching her closely, he thinks for a minute "Okay then, if that's what you day. It was just that I ...wondered. You know because um... well we... we at the motel, before"

"Sorry no!" she sighs staring at him

"Okay, well I'll let you get some rest. I'll come see you tomorrow, yeah?"

"That would be good. Look please, will you try and speak to Jason.?"

" I'll see what I can do" He nods and then he leaves

"OH GOD!" she lets out a cry of despair as she watches him go. Her heart aches. She feels so alone right in this moment and can't hold back as the tears roll down her cheeks.

She unzips the wash bag Lisa brought in for her, checking the contents and then zips it up. She leans her head back in the pillow closing her eyes.

"Ms Lewis" She opens her eyes looking as the two guys in suits stand in the doorway "We need to talk, now!"

"Yeah ... yeah sure" She nods as they set the laptop up in front of her on the table.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

The guys are spun up the next day at short notice. A quick intel retrieval in Syria, given to Mandy at short notice. It turns into a quick, but nightmarish shit storm of an operation. Something goes wrong, and a kid gets hold of one of their weapons shooting his friend.

On their return they're walking back to the base, quietly engaged in general chatter. Trying to forget the whole incident

"I seriously need a shower; I feel like I've rolled around in a sand pit!" Clay looks at Sonny

"You're not tellin me somethin I don't know. You stink!" Sonny sniffs loudly and laughs

"JASON!" Blackburn's at his door across the hallway. He shouts, "A WORD!"

They all stop and look at each other they let out one long collective sigh "Oh SHIT!" Jason rolls his eyes "I'll catch you guys up"

"Don't like the sound of Blackburn's tone"

"No, it doesn't sound too good"

"What is it?" Jason frowns "Is this about that weapon because I was gonna..."

"In here!" Blackburn points the briefing room.

Davis sits at her laptop. Sonny frown at her. She looks down avoiding his gaze "What is it? What's going on?" Sonny looks at Ray

"I don't know, but it's not good, whatever it is "

Clay's been to get a bottle of water and he can feel the sombre mood on his return "What's going on?"

"Don't know, but Blackburn called Jason in!"

"SHIT! You think it's about that weapon? The one the kid got hold of?"

"Could be. I don't know" _Shit!_ "I knew we'd take the wrap for that. Alright, let's not say anything hasty. Keep cool. Let's see what Jason says when he comes out. See how he wants to play it"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

"Jason sit down! "

"Eric what is? Is this about yesterday? That weapon?"

Blackburn shakes his head "Look there is no easy way to say this so I'm just gonna come out with it" he pauses taking a deep breath

"This _is_ about that weapon. Fuck! I knew we'd carry the can for that. Look..."

"Jason shut up! It's not about the mission"

"So, what is it? What's wrong?"

"Look it's um... Catherine, CJ. She..." He rubs his head and looks down avoiding Jason's gaze _ahhh!_ "Okay some guy from the hospital called, they still had your contact details on file for her as next of kin. She um... she died. Yesterday. I'm so sorry"

"Sorry! What? What the hell." he frowns trying to make sense of Eric's words "Died? But... but she was getting better when we left? I...I called, and I checked with them before we got spun up. No, that doesn't make any sense they said she was ready to discharge. I had everything in place, the rehab she' was... No! No, what the hell happened?"

Blackburn bites his lip taking a deep breath "Seems she um.. she took an overdose, some pills"

"What the hell?! She was in a hospital for Christ sake!?" he's angry and confused "How they hell did she get some pills?

"Supposedly, she had some painkillers, hidden in a wash bag. There was half a bottle of whiskey too"

"She didn't have any painkillers. I was careful I made sure of that"

"Look the Doctor that called the um... he said they weren't hers" Blackburn hesitates before he speaks "The bottle, it ... it had your name on, they were yours!"

"What? Mine?! I didn't ..." Jason frowns screwing up his face "but I didn't have any painkillers!" he frowns confused, trying to think " Oh shit! The ones for my leg, the ones I didn't take. Oh Jesus!" Jason can't breathe. He sits, dropping down into the chair. No, he remembers the bottle of strong pain killers they gave him, when Reuben stabbed his leg. He only took one, they made him feel too drowsy and he hid them away. Only kept them, just in case he did need them "she obviously found them! Oh god no!... SHIT!" he rubs his head

"Look Jason I'm so sorry! I don't know what to say except that if you want anything, anything at all then you just have to ask!" he lets out a deep sigh releasing the tension built up when he realized he'd have to be the one to break this news.  
His part now feels complete "Look um... I gonna stand BRAVO down, for a few days at least" he looks sympathetically at Jason "I am sorry! Look, I'll let you have the room. Give you some space to clear your head"

Jason nods "Eric... Eric, thanks"

Blackburn leaves. He looks back at Jason. He feels there is something more he should say but can't. Jason sits quiet for quite some time thinking about everything, trying to make sense of how it has all ended so quickly like this. That it all got out of hand so badly.

The silence is broken as Ray comes to the doorway "Hey...Look um... Blackburn just told me what happened! Jason Brother, I'm so sorry. I know how much you loved her. You okay?"

Shit! Jason nods as he lets out a long slow breath of air "I need to go home. I need to pick up my kids"

"You want me to drive ya?"

"No, no I'll be fine!" he thinks for a minute " What the hell am I gonna do now, Ray?"

"Look man, ..." Ray sighs "Jason you'll get through this. You know that, right?"

"What because I've done it before? Is that what you're saying?" he frowns "It won't be so bad this time, because I've lost a woman I love once before. I'm experienced at this now, right! losing people I love."

"No Jace, No that's not what I ... man, that's not what I meant" suddenly Ray doesn't have the right words

"This is my fault, Ray! I didn't take care or her properly" he shakes his head "The times I've said that, the times I let her down! I gotta go" he looks at Ray as he stands up "Look um Ray ... can you ...will you um.. tell Clay. I don't think I can deal with him right now"

"Yeah sure, if you want me to. I'll take care of it" Ray nods "Jace ... you need anything you know where I am, right? You know that I'm right here always"

Sonny and Clay come to the doorway "Hey what's up?"

Jason walks past and out the door without a word. He takes out his cell from his pocket and makes a call "Hey Mom. Look um... I'm coming to pick up Mikey and JC up. No nothing's wrong..I just missed them. Okay! No Mom, I'll explain when I get there "

"Where's he going? Ray, what is it? What's happened" Sonny frowns

"Um...". Ray gulps he's trying to make sense for himself "it err ..." he bites his lip he's not sure if he can say the words. The times they've thought it but there's always been some hope this time it's actually for real "its .." he coughs "CJ she's um... she's dead. Overdose."

"Oh my god! "Clay holds his breath "No! No, no! Oh my god what happened?" Clay's head spins he feels faint. Sonny can see it and sits him down. He puts his head in his hands, he's a blurring mess of confusion

"She's dead?! How the hell that happen Ray?" Sonny frowns

"I don't have all the details but..." he swallows the emotional lump in his throat "She took an overdose, of painkillers"

"Woah! How the hell?" Sonny then looks at Clay "Clay, Buddy come here. I'm so sorry man I'm so sorry" Sonny wraps his arms round him as much as he hated her and for himself he couldn't care that she's gone but he can see the hurt in his Clay's face. When all said and done Sonny knows Clay loved her. This is going to hurt him so much.

They sit in silence for a long time . Ray and Sonny look at each other than at Clay, but no one moves. Clay's just sat there shaking her head.

"You know, she asked me to speak to Jason for her. Asked me to stop him from sending her away. She didn't wanna go. I said I couldn't help her! Shit! I should have, I should have helped her!" He rubs his head "I turned my back on her. This is my fault. I knew she was hurting and didn't wanna go. I should have done something"

"Hey man this is _not_ your fault. Don't say that. She needed help. Jason made the right call"

Clay shakes his head "I'm going to the hospital I need to see her"

"What?! No, wait Clay sit down there's nothing you can do there, man!"

"I just need to go. I need ... I just need to see her one more time. I need to say I'm sorry. She lost my baby Sonny and I didn't help her"

Sonny and Ray exchange concerned looks. Sonny nervously swallow "Okay.. okay I'll come with you then. You can't go alone."

o-o-o-o-o-o

AS they arrive at her hospital room they see that it's closed off, taped up with police incident tape over the doorway

"What the hell's going on here?" they look at each other confused. They can see her clothes that Lisa brought still on the chair "Excuse me!" Clay stops one of the nurses coming out of the next room.

She smiles at Clay she remembers seeing him from before, how cute he was he caught her eye "Oh hey. "

"What's going on there?"

"Oh, I don't know. Ms Lewis, she wasn't my patient and they had some private nurses they brought in a couple of days ago who dealt with her. She was a private patient. So sorry I can't be of more assistance"

"Private patient? "Clay frowns looking at Sonny as they both seem confused "Whats with the tape?"

The nurse looks around. She shouldn't really be talking about it, but she's taken a shine to Clay and he looks genuinely worried. "Look, I only know a little, like I say she's not my patient but all I know is some guys in suits came, they taped it off. Said no one was to go in there. You know what happened, right?" she frowns and Clay nods "You're friends, with her? I saw you here before" she smiles

"Yeah! Yeah we were good friends" he coughs

"You all military right? The guys they came with military. I heard them talking."

Clay shakes his head avoiding the question "So where's her body I mean .. where I can I see her?"

"Oh, um... I don't think you can. Look..." she looks around suddenly afraid for talking "from what I overhead, her family made arrangements and took her yesterday"

"Family?!... What family? CJ didn't have any family. Her father is dead."

"I don't know any more than that, but I think .. it might have been her brother? Like I say they had private nurses deal with her. Look I'm sorry I need to go. Perhaps I shouldn't have said anything." She sees the confused look on his face "Look...ask at reception one of the Doctors might be able to tell you more" she smiles then rests her hand on his arm "sorry!"

"Thanks!" He smiles at her then looks at Sonny confused "Sonny what the hell's going on? She didn't have any family; she was an only child. " They sit down on the seats in the corridor Clay puts his head in his hands rubbing his face as Sonny paces around the corridor

"Clay its over man. Whoever this family was, is. There's nothing we can do now. We gotta accept it she's gone"

Clay can't get his head round it. "No! No, I can't. There's something wrong her Sonny. Somethings not right. I can feel it."

"Clay Let it go! Look, let's go get a drink! You're thinking things that aren't there" he watches Clay thinking this over " Clay, please it's over! I'm sorry but that's it she aint coming back, no matter what" He puts his hand on Clay's shoulder as Clay shakes his head

"No...no it can't be!"

o-o-o-o-o-o


	54. Chapter 54

**What are you up to?**

 **10 months later **

"JC kick it" Jason smiles as the little boy kicks out at the ball, missing it completely

"I'll get it for him Dad!"

"Okay! JC kick it to Mikey" Jason grins, he's happy watching his boys play together. Then he stops watching them and looks up. There's a flash and it catches his peripheral vision. Looking around he can't see anything and then dismissing it he get back to the soccer game. "Kick it again." seeing him struggle Jason goes across to help him.

"Hey Jason..." Ray frowns at him as he sees him looking away, he again is distracted "Jameelah wants to know if JC wants to go on the swing? Naima's over there with them"

"Hey JC… you wanna go on the swing?" Jason smiles as the little boy nods to him. As he looks up over his shoulder he can see a car parked beside the fence and again something flashes.

"JC go with Jameelah, she'll push… you" his words peter off and he turns to watch the car, keeping one eye on the vehicle he quickly looks at his boy, nodding that he can go "Go... go on… then" he smiles but his attention is distracted trying to see who the guy is, sitting in the driver seat.

"Mikey kick it back to me" he continues to play soccer with Mikey alone now that JC has gone to the swing. Ray coming to join them he easily snatches the ball away from Jason's feet "Hey! That's cheating there Ray" he laughs "I wasn't looking" He looks up again.

Ray also laughs as he kicks the ball back, this time Jason doesn't acknowledge him and the ball rolls past "Jason!...Hey Jace!...Jace, the ball!" Jason doesn't respond and Ray frowns watching him "Hey Brother was sup?" He stands beside him, his eyes following the direction Jason's looking

"Nothing" he frowns "I don't know um... it's Probably nothing"

"Somethings spooked ya! So, what we looking at?"

"That car. See it? The silver one, window down but blackout tints all round?"

"Yeah! What about it?"

"It's been there a while now. Probably nothing but ... I thought I just saw a flash, maybe a camera."

"You wanna check it out? You know to be sure?"

"Oh, maybe just being paranoid. Maybe worth a look"

"Hey man, can't be too careful, especially around the kids. You know if somethings making you feel off. Trust your gut man! Let's just check it out, yeah?"

"Yeah. Can't do no harm to give it the once over"

"You want me to go around?"

"Yeah. Let's give the tree a shake, see what falls out. Like you say, to be sure"

"Naima!" Ray calls over to her at the swings "Watch the kids for a minute"

"Sure!" she frowns "Honey is there something wrong?"

"No baby just um… boy talk for a minute" he points to Jason

"Oh okay!" she frowns, she a little concerned but she knows they would never let anything happen, so she isn't too worried "Hey Jameelah, careful with him there.. that's too high"

Ray comes around the back of the car where it's parked. Jason comes to the fence. He spots the large camera equipment and now gets worried "HEY! You! ... Yeah you! . What're you doing?"

As the driver sees Jason approach he starts to close the window and as he gets closer he starts the engine. As he does Ray taps against the glass on the passenger. The driver doesn't wait and putting his foot down he speeds off.

 _"Oh hell!_ " What was that all about?"

"I have no idea" He frowns, shaking his head "You get the registration?"

"Yeah, I'll call it in to Davis, get it checked out. You think it's something to do with us?" Ray frowns worried

Jason's concerned as he stands trying to think "I don't know let's just get the kids home. Make sure they're safe"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"COME!"

The heavy dark oak door opens to the large plush, oak panelled office. There's a large dark oak desk with high back leather office chair to the end of the room. Matt walks in, striding forward to the desk

"Matt! What can I do for you?"

"I've got those files you wanted. Are you alright?"

"Yeah .. yeah, it's nothing to worry about"

"You sure? You wanna tell me what's going on?" He frowns seeing all the files strewn over the desk. The main one, that's laid open on top of the others, has large color photographs they show a man playing soccer with two boys in a park. "You still having Hayes monitored?"

"Yeah, yeah for a while"

"You know I thought Daniel said there was no credible threat against him? As far as he could tell he's no threat to us. I thought he said he doesn't know anything?"

"No harm in keeping an eye on him for now. Though this .. this guy wasn't as _careful_ as he should have been this time. He got seen. I told you Jason's not stupid. I hope Daniels taken care of that?"

"I guess he'll have dealt with it yeah!"

"So, what have you got?"

"Um...Daniel told me to give you this." He throws a file on the table "Agent Ellis, he said she's becoming a bit of a liability, asking too many questions. Digging where she doesn't need to . Looking for ghosts?"

 _"Hmmmm!_ Yeah last thing we need is her sniffing around. I thought she might have dropped things by now. I've sent her on an enough wild goose chase. I thought she'd be bored"

"Well I don't think she will. To be honest I looked at her file and from her profile, I don't think she's the type that gives up easy. So, what are you going to do?" he frowns

" _Hmmm!_ Good question. You know what, get Daniel to send her a new target package. Something that will keep her very busy. While I consider the options about what to do with her. If she doesn't leave well alone, then there might have to be a more _permanent_ solution. It's nothing she doesn't deserve of course. "

"Permanent? What you mean... You don't really want to do that, do you?"

"If I have to, I will but um...who knows. There are plenty of options on the table. Oh! and by the way, in her file does it say if she's seeing anyone now? Maybe we can use that as an angle to keep her quiet."

"Um... no one I don't think she was. She looks like she had a thing with her and Hayes, but I think that fizzled out. I studied his file too and he didn't seem ready to commit yet, had some issues. I guess from when his wife died. I don't think she or he have seen anyone since then"

He moves the files round on the desk looking through the photos in the file "His boy's getting big now. You could always use him as leverage if it comes to it. If that's the route you wanted to go?"

"NO! No, his boy stays out of it! No one touches the boy!"

"If that's what you want? " he frowns "Look um...you sure this keeping an eye on Hayes, is just cos he's a threat? I mean, it's not more of a _personal_ interest?"

"No! Why would it be? Matt ... that's done. Finished. No interest there."

"Right!" he nods "Okay then!" He comes around the back of the chair "Look …. Catherine I know it must be hard." He starts to massage her shoulders. "Seeing Hayes in these photos. So why do you keep up the surveillance? I mean, it's not needed now"

" _Mmmm!"_ she closes her eyes enjoying the firm grip he has on her shoulder, loosening the tension from her neck

"He came close, noticing this last time. Doesn't it worry you in case he starts sniffing around as well?"

"He won't!"

"Are you sure?"

"I told you, it's done. He's moved on. He bought the story. There's no reason he should go looking for anything. The only reason he would is because of Ellis and like I said, I'm on to fixing that"

"Well ..." he turns he chair round so she's facing him "then how about we call it day and go get a drink" he smile " and um.. some takeaway food, then go back to mine?"

 _Mmmm!_ She sighs "Let's start with the drink, see where it goes shall we?"

"Well I know where it usually goes after a drink!" He smiles, leaning forward he kisses her.

 _Hmmmm!_ She groans in pleasure, wrapping her arms around his neck and kisses him back

"Catherine!" the door suddenly opens, and the tall, dark-haired guy walks in, striding towards her desk

"What now?" she sighs "Do you not know how to knock?"

"Sorry. Sorry to interrupt" he sneers "But we need to talk!"

"Can't you see... I'm busy right now"

"Yeah…yeah you look really busy !" he sighs staring at he and Matt "Look, I need your authorization on something, sister dear"

"Matt... " She closes her eyes taking a deep breath "... I'm sorry, we'll have to rain check that drink" she smiles "What is it Daniel?"

"I need to talk to you about something"

"And...what's so important it can't wait?"

"Someone made a classified request on the system. It was um... it was for your medical file! that's why it can't wait!"

"What?... Who? Who the hell did that and why?"

"That Ellis woman. Agent Mandy Ellis"

"Damnit!" she looks up at Matt "Did she get access... well, did she? "

"No, no we bounced her back. but she is asking a lot of questions putting in a lot of requests. I'm worried about what she's looking for. "

"Jesus" Catherine rubs her head "What the hell is she up to?"

"I have no idea. Look I'll find out...

"No, send one of ours down there. Give her some information, for the new target package that she's looking into. Make sure it's something of interest to her" she takes a deep breath "Oh and Daniel, whoever goes make sure he's single" she laughs "You know um... you might want to consider going personally this time. So, it doesn't' get screwed up. Might keep you occupied and her distracted"

 _Hmmm!_ Catherine sits back in her chair and lets out a long sigh "What the hell are you up to Mandy Ellis?"

o-o-o-o-o-o


	55. What happened here?

**Chapter 55: What happened here?**

"Hey" Jason smiles as he leans on the door frame and puts his head around into the office "You burning the candle at both ends?"

"Hey!" Mandy looks at her watch "Oh damn! You know, I didn't realise it was that late" She starts to gather together the files she's been working on into an ordered pile

"Something good?" Jason nods towards the paperwork " Maybe something of interest for us?"

"Um... no! Just... just checking something out" she smiles nervously, covering the files over

Jason frowns. He doesn't say anything, but he gets a feeling she's covering something up "You got anything headed our way?"

"Hopefully" she nods "soon...Well maybe. I need to check it out a bit more first, after all the bad intel I received these past couple months. This one set my alarm bell ringing, so I wanna be sure this time"

"You wanna talk about it, maybe over a drink?"

"You not gotta get back for the kids?"

"No, my mom took Mikey and JC to visit a friend of hers so... I'm kid free, with downtime to kill"

"Alright then, that would be nice." She smiles "I'll just go tidy myself up"

"Okay I'll wait here" he smiles at her as she heads to the ladies' room. Once he's sure she's out of sight he pulls the files she was looking at out from the other paperwork. Turning them around and keeping half and eye on the bathroom door, he can partially see from the office, he opens the file cover.

**Offshore Trust Fund – Lewis** is typed in large letters on the top of the paperwork inside

"What the hell?" he frowns as he flicks through the first file which contains financial records and statements. He then lifts the cover on the second which contains large color photographs of a woman _Rita?_ he frowns trying to read quickly but then he hears the click of the bathroom door and pushes the files back where they were.

"Ready" she smiles gathering her jacket

"Yeah sure" He smiles gesturing her out the door. He looks back at the files, his mind's ticking over wondering about the contents.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"You wanna sit in a booth?" Jason indicates as they enter the bar "I'll get us some drinks?...Gin and tonic?"

"Sure," she nods " I'll be over there, and yes Gin and tonic would be nice. Thanks"

Jason's back from the bar with the drinks "So... what've you got on the boil then?"

"Oh, nothing much. Couple things I'm looking in to"

"Nothing much ...okay!" He looks at her frowning "Alright... put my hands up, I sneaked a look at the files. What's going on Mandy? Did you really track Rita down?"

"Jason!" she shakes her head "Those files are classified"

"Yeah I know! But then I'm cleared for classified, right?" he smiles

"It's not a joke Jason" her face is stern and annoyed

"Hey relax! Why so stressed? Anything in it, the Rita thing?"

"I don't know" she sighs

"Why what's up? I know how bad you wanna get her, so what's making you back off now?"

"We've been given the run around lately. I just feel it might be another lead that comes to nothing"

"Hey.." he puts his hand on hers "you can only go by the intel in front of you. So, you had a couple of bad calls" he shrugs "Happens to the best of us!"

"I know but it seems now I was deliberately being giving compromised intel"

"You really think that?"

"I'm not sure... but something doesn't feel right with this. It's like I'm getting tied up wasting time for no reason"

He frowns and sips his drink "So who gave you the intel?"

"That just it. All the intel's coming from normally reliable sources"

"So, what you gonna do?"

"I don't know yet" She shrugs, taking a sip from her drink "But I'm working on it"

"So, err... you gonna tell me about the financial file? What's that about?"

She bites her lip wishing he hadn't asked about that "Oh that's just um...just something I'm looking into for now"

"Is it something to do with me?" he stares at her "Something about what I asked you to check out?"

She wonders whether to answer. "Maybe! But Jason, don't get your hopes up there's nothing definite there yet"

"Nothing definite... right! Look Mandy, I saw the account name, so I know there's something?"

"Really Jason, I don't know yet."

"Mandy... if there's something I should know then you need to tell me."

She watches his face, awkwardly stirring her drink. She takes another sip "Jason..." she hesitates "... have you ever received any money. . .for Jaycee?"

"Money?" he frowns "What money?"

"I don't know...payments from the Navy? An insurance maybe?...Anything."

"No! Nothing I know of. Why should I?" he frowns "to be honest I hadn't thought about money. Does this mean you traced some of this _family_ or something?"

"No! Sorry her files are still all restricted. I can't get access. I keep getting bounced out of the system. I've got a hacker working on it. But don't you think it's strange that JC didn't get anything? I mean he was her son." She stirs her drink again and takes another sip "Look, it may be nothing but..." she sighs "...but that account.. the one in the file it's an off shore trust account...and the named beneficiary appears to be Jaycee" she bites her lip and continues "Jason that account had an opening balance of $300,000 dollars and several other substantial payments have been made into it" she looks at him watching her "those payments are still being made. There was one in the last month!"

"What the hell?! So, what are you saying, that someone's paying money into an account for him that I don't know about?" he frowns at her "Who? Who's making the payments?"

She stares back at him "That's just it, I don't know! I've tried looking into it via usual channels, but I keep hitting a brick wall. I've been trying to trace details of the account that sent the money to it but..." she sighs "...every tech guy I use can't find anything or... or they come back saying they don't want to"

"Oh, c'mon, that must be pretty routine stuff, tracing money. I mean for the CIA"

"You'd think" she sips her drink again

"So why can't you find anything out? There must be something you can do?"

"Nothing more officially, No! Look, I'm going to Washington tomorrow. I know a guy... I know him from college, a thing we had" she smiles "He's a whizz kid financial system security advisor ... or simply put a hacker" she laughs "officially he tests security systems for the Pentagon now. Keeps him legit. I've used him a couple of times before. He's very good." she stares at him "I'm hoping to ask him to take a look"

"Can't you just call him?"

"I can't..." she laughs again "he doesn't trust cell phones. He's a little... paranoid! So, it has to be in person"

"Okay!...well then you want some company? . . . to Washington, tomorrow?"

"Are you serious?" she frowns at him

"Why not?" he shrugs "if this involves me, or Jaycee then... look I'm on R&R for couple days. My Mom has the kids, so I could come, see what we can find out"

She has some doubts that it's a good idea that he comes but also she can't help feeling it would nice spending the time with him "Okay! If you're sure?" She smiles "that'll be great. I'll book another flight"

He looks at her empty glass "You want another drink?"

She looks at her watch "Okay, one more" she smiles. As Jason goes to the bar she thinks how much she enjoys his company. He returns from the bar and sits back down across the table from her. She smiles "Thanks! So, how are you? I mean, how are you coping."

"Yeah" he sighs "We're getting there." he takes a sip of his beer "You know some days are worse than others . . . It's kinda hard as I didn't get to say goodbye properly, you know there not being any funeral" he drinks again "and um. .. I still can't help feeling guilty, that I might have pushed her to it!"

"You didn't push her to it ... Jason she was in a bad place. Y you don't need to feel guilty."

"But Mandy, I was so angry with her at the end. For god sake I took her son away and told her I was gonna send her somewhere she didn't want to go! You don't think I don't regret that?" he shakes his head "Do you know she begged me not to send her.. to rehab? But still I was gonna do it!" He lets out a sorrowful sigh "I don't know, feels like I didn't get proper closure and too much I wish I could have taken back"

He rubs his face trying to deal with his emotions and he looks round the bar while sipping his beer hoping Mandy doesn't notice how upset he is. "Jason, you shouldn't feel guilty. Sending her to rehab, it was gonna be the best thing for her"

"I know but I can't change the way I feel"

"Look um... I know things were a bit awkward between us after _that_ kiss and I know you weren't ready. You were right it was too soon but... Jason, I'm still your friend and if you ever need to talk then you know where I am... Always!" she puts her hand back on top of his

He smiles taking hold of her hand and rubbing it "Yeah I'm sorry about all that. I didn't handle it very well."

"It's fine" she smiles

He takes a big sigh getting himself straight "Right drink up! I better get you back if we've got a flight to catch in the morning"

0-0-0-0-0-0-0

"Hey, you leaving already. It's not that late" Matt leans on his elbow in the bed and rubs her bare back with his other hand as CJ picks her bra up from the floor and starts to put it on

"Um... yeah I've got some work I need to look at "

"Work? Can't it wait till morning?" He frowns at her excuse "Look.. why don't you stay tonight? ...It would be nice to wake up with you for a change instead of this... you leaving"

He starts to button her blouse "Look Matt, please...let's not do this again! Why complicate things?" She turns and kisses him "Come on look.. it's only been a couple of months. I don't see this need to rush anything by getting serious"

"I don't think staying the night after two months would be considered rushing things, do you?...Maybe just a natural progression?" he smiles as he puts his hand under her blouse trying to undo her bra again.

"Matt Stop! I just need some time, okay?"

"You're holding back?" he frowns at her. he pauses watching her get dressed "This got something to do with those pictures of Hayes?" he keeps watching how she reacts. Reading her body language "Oh... I get it! You're still not over him."

"Oh please!... Matt, this has nothing to do with Jason, so stop trying to analyse it"

"Hey, I can't help it" he laughs "my psych training. It's what I do, remember?"

"Yeah well I don't need it right now!"

"No!" he shakes his head he's annoyed with her "But you did!" he pauses again watching for a reaction "So what? I've outlasted my usefulness now. You passed your eval and got back to work so I'm not needed?"

"Matt come on.. it's nothing like that" She leans in and tries to reassure him with a kiss "I know you helped me get myself together and I'll always be grateful for that" She leans in putting her hand on his face, staring him full in the eyes "You pulled me back from the brink...after everything" she kisses him "I just don't like being pressurized. You know that"

"Yeah sure!"

"Oh Matt, come on! Don't be like this." he shrugs her off "Okay fine, you know what ...you be how want.. I'm done with this!" She stands up and zips her skirt up "I thought this was good... I thought you liked keeping it casual for now, no strings?"

He ignores her whilst he lays on his back looking at the ceiling not looking at her. She rolls her eyes exasperated by him "Its early days, why have we gotta rush things? Not being funny...you live in a government approved hotel" she points round the room "I'm not sure I should be seen here on a permanent basis"

"Maybe I'm ready to take it further! Did you consider that?"

She sighs and laughs "Come on.. this is okay isn't it? We're good?" she keeps smiling that sexy smile she does as she leans in to kiss him, but he pulls back from her "Okay look ... how about I stay a while longer? That work can keep" she starts to unzip her skirt again

"Well maybe if the hotel is a concern to you, then you do something with the empty house you own. Make use of it?"

She's annoyed now "seriously Matt that again? What did l just say about rushing things?"

"Okay! Okay, I get it you don't wanna live in it... but you gotta do something with it."

"No!" she shakes her head "No I don't! The house stays as it is. I'll do something with it when _I'm_ ready!" she closes her eyes getting her temper under control "You know what? I am done now!"

"Catherine!" He frowns but she ignores him "Seriously I'm sorry, alright?.. Catherine come on! ... Oh, for god's sake what's this all about?"

"Nothing!... Sorry, I need to go" She puts her jacket on. And looks at her watch

"Will I see you tomorrow?"

She looks at her phone and opens an email sent a few hours back. She frowns at the picture of Jason and Mandy arriving at the boarding gate for a Washington flight _What are you up to? she frowns_

"Catherine?" he questions her, seeing the way she's looking at her phone "What is it? "

She stops at the door and looks at him "Nothing, it doesn't matter" she sighs "I'll speak to you later" With that she takes her bag and shuts the door behind her

He lets out an enormous frustrated sigh _SHIT!_ He rubs his head as he lays back on the bed thinking, then he picks up his phone and makes a call "Yeah it's Matt... that surveillance I ordered, I want you to step it up. I wanna know everything she does. Who she speaks to, who she calls, all of it? I need to find out whats going on here! If she's hiding something I want you do find out what!" ... He listens to the voice on the end "Yeah I know who she is! The point is can you do it or not?"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The elevator stops and the doors open, Catherine walks into the lobby of the hotel and takes out her cell phone to make a call.

"Yeah that email you sent earlier. I need someone on it this end." she pauses to listen "No ... I need to know what they're up to. Where they go? I need everything" As she hangs up the call on the phone she lets out a long sigh. Looking around the lobby she's thinking what to do next and as she does two people at the reception desk catch her eye "Oh my god!" _Shit!_

Taking another a deep breath and turns her back. She spots Mandy and Jason at the check in desk. She isn't surprised Mandy's staying there, the Grand Hotel is government approved for expenses, and central location, it also had a better reputation than some of the others so, a lot of agents used it when staying in Washington. But seeing them in the flesh still takes her by surprise.

Watching from across the room she sees them laughing and joking, Mandy touching at Jason's arm as they register at the desk. She frowns _Fuck!_ As they turn around to head to the elevator she covers her face with her hand "Oh my god!" she looks around for a way to get out of there. She makes another call "Yeah I need car sent to the Grand to pick me up"

She continues to watch until the doors to the elevator close and they're gone from view "You know what forget it. I'll get a cab!" Biting her lip, she's thinking W _hat the hell are they up to?_

She makes another call "Yeah it's me again. I need you to action what I asked ASAP. They're at the Grand already and just checked in. I need to know what Agent Ellis is in Washington for because she was supposed to be on her way to Mexico. Why is she here? " she listens again "What do you mean she didn't buy it?" she sighs loudly "Then you _find_ this Rita, bring her in ... I don't care how. Just get it done!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Back at her office, Catherine flick the switch and turns on the desk light, she leans back in her large black leather chair. She starts to think about what just happened, what could have happened.

 _SHIT!_ She sighs. She thought she was dealing with her feelings. The surveillance photographs of Jason and JC that she had regularly delivered to her, were always hard to look at but they were also a necessary way for her to deal with the pain of not being able to have any physical contact. Those pictures kept her sane but seeing Jason, there in front of her, in the flesh well that brought a different set of feelings. A sudden rush of emotions that she thought she'd boxed up inside and dealt with. She was wrong. Seeing him at the hotel had really caught her off guard it had knocked her, it made her heartbeat faster.

She picks up his photograph that's still laying on her desk from earlier. She runs her fingers around the outline of him and JC. Taking a deep breath in, she lets it out slowly counting to ten. Matt had told her to do that when she felt stressed

 _Oh Jason!_ She sighs, biting her lip while she takes some time studying the other pictures that lay on her desk. She drops them down and leans back in the chair taking another calming breath _Pheww! ...Shit!_

With her head tipped back, tears prick her eyes. She brushes them away quickly _Oh my god ... Uh! C'mon Catherine pull it together!_ she takes a deeper breath. "Don't let this get to you!"

She looks at her hands, they're shaking. She pulls open the bottom drawer of her desk and stares inside at the contents _SHIT!_ She hesitates and then closes it. Just as she's about to let go of the handle she stops, changing her mind she opens it again.

Swallowing nervously, she's trying desperately to relieve this tension. Breathing and counting it's having now effect and slowly she pulls out the sealed bottle of Jack Daniels. She stands it on the desk in front of her followed by one of the two glasses stored with it.

She kept it there with two glasses as a supposed _tribute_ to her Father, well that's what she tried to tell herself. But this now was the truth of why she really kept it there. In case she got stressed, in case she needed it. Right now,... she thinks she needs it!

Turning the bottle slowly and carefully around on the desk until the label's is square on facing her. She just continues to sit and look at it. _What the hell are you doing?_ she sighs, just staring at it thinking _Put it back!_

She rubs her still shaking hands together. Putting her head down trying to focus. She closes her eyes breathing slowly _Ten... nine...eight..._ She's trying to focus on anything, anything that stops her thinking about opening that bottle. But she can't stop thinking about how it tastes and thinking about the feeling she'll get from drinking it.

Now she's up out of her chair pacing the room, still trying not to think about that _Dammit!_  
She rubs her chin and again starts from ten. _Oh shit! Think anything! Anything but not that!"_

It's no good, she can't and as she looks again at the bottle sitting there it calls to her. She weak now and it has power over her. _Come on CJ, you can do this! You don't need it!_  
Taking more forced and even deeper deliberate breaths now, she turns her back on the bottle

"FUCK!" she cries out. Her hands are really shaking now, and she can do nothing except think about drinking it. Staring long and hard wondering how many times she can keep looking before she opens it.

Then she's at the desk, breaking the seal, pouring the liquid into the glass and knocking the fiery liquid down her throat without giving herself any more time for thought.

The speed it hits the back of her mouth causes her to cough. _Urggghh! Shit!_ tears roll down her face. "Fuck!...Oh my god FUCK" she's so angry with herself and not sure if it's the taste after all this time or realizing the stupidity of what she's done she starts to cry.

Then comes the wave of anger, the realization of her actions hit her. That she gave in. In that moment of anger, she throws the glass that's in her hand at the wall _"Fuuuuuck!"_ she screams as her body is awash with emotions and then finally, she collapses tearfully back in her chair and closes her eyes.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason drops their bags on the floor "Oh!" he stares as they are confronted by one double bed in the room

"Oh no! Oh, Jason I'm sorry. I'll ring down. I specifically asked for a twin-bedded room"

"It's okay!" he fidgets awkwardly as Mandy rings reception

"No! What do you mean you don't have any other rooms? We need twin beds" she look up at him shes uncomfortable hoping he doesn't think she did it on purpose.

He points to the floor "Mandy I'll just bunk down here!" he whispers

She shakes her head, covering her hand over the phone "I'll sort it. I'm sorry" she continues to speak to the receptionist before finally hanging up the call "Jason, I'm so sorry they say they're full. They might be able to move us tomorrow"

"It's a couple of nights" he laughs "I've slept in worse places"

"Okay if you're sure?" she smiles "Look, come on. I'll buy dinner, my treat"

"Okay! Now you're talking. I'm starving!" he puts his arm around her "Hey come on, don't worry. No big deal" He smiles

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

After dinner and perhaps too many drinks they head back to the room.

"Jason ... you know what I said about if you need to talk, I meant it, I'm always here for you" she puts her hand on his arm as she looks up at him smiling.

"Yeah, I know, and I appreciate it" he feels awkward as they unlock the door. He can feel her body getting closer to his "Mandy I don't know what's going on he...re .." She leans in and something comes over her she just reaches up and kisses him. He holds her back "Woaah! That wasn't what I was talking about ... I was talking about the files"

"Oh ... oh right! Yeah the files... what's going on, yeah I'm sorry" she's really embarrassed now

"Hey um... no, I'm sorry" he laughs awkwardly "I'm not sure we should've had that last drink"

"I'm sorry, it's still too soon, right? It was me, I misread the signals. I'm sorry .. sorry, I just thought ... we get on so well...and _..._ " she sighs "I just feel like there ...Sorry! No, you're right, I had too much to drink"

It's all so awkward now "Oh Mandy, it's not you. I just don't think I'm ready for any of this.. I'm not sure I can commit to anything right now We're still friends though, right?"

"You're still not over her?" she looks disappointed "CJ I mean"

"It's not that ... Oh I don't know, maybe. I just worry about getting close to someone again After everything.. losing Alana, losing CJ.I don't know."

"Okay!" She nods "But does it have to be serious?" She shrugs "I mean we all get a little lonely? And need someone now and again" she bites her lip wondering if she sounds desperate or pathetic, but she wants him so much.

She keeps looking at him and he stares at her. Then in the next moment he's all over her, pushing her in the door onto the bed. He lifts up from kissing her for a moment "You sure you want this?"

She nods her body full of excitement, she's wanted this for a long time, but CJ always got in the way now they were free of her. He starts to undress her, dropping her skirt to the floor. He's kissing her on her neck, down her shoulders across her chest but then, suddenly, he stops.

"I'm sorry!" he shakes his head and sits up "Sorry, I can't do this" he steps back still shaking his head "This doesn't feel right. Mandy I'm so sorry" he rubs his head "Oh, jeez whats wrong with me?"

"Jason..." She sighs "It's okay!" she lies, trying to smile through her disappointment. It's not alright and it hurts but she understands how hard it is for him.

"Look Mandy it's not you, I'm sorry!" he rubs his hands through his hair "Fuck! I just...she just.." he sits there just keep shaking his head "Oh god Mandy. It's there all the time going around and around. What I said, what she said.. _SHIT_!"

"Jason it's fine, really" she feels really hurt and swallows the lump in her throat before speaking again "I get it ... I do .. you need more time" she reaches up to him

"I just don't wanna spoil our friendship. It means too much. You've always been there for me"

"Yeah ... I get it" She feels awkward now as he sits on the edge of the bed beside her

"SHIT!" he rubs his head again "Mandy I am so sorry! Do you think I'm ever gonna be free of her?"

Mandy rubs his back "One day! You're getting there it's just gonna take a bit more time" she smiles. She feels for him but at the same time she's so hurt. He looks at her hoping something will spark but it doesn't

"I'm sorry... you want me to go?"

"No! No, don't be stupid. Friends?"

"Friends" he pulls her in and holds her. Then lays back on the bed still holding her. She takes comfort in being close to him. She thought he was ready to move on, but this shows how wrong she was. She smiles as she lays there beside him, his big strong arms wrapped around her. She'll take this for now if there nothing else he can offer.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

CJ opens her eyes to find she's fallen asleep in her office chair. "oh Shit!" she wrinkles her nose up frowning at ache in her head. Leaning forward in the chair she rubs at her neck which is aching. "Oh god!... what the fuck did you do?" she squints in the light as she surveys the room.  
Then she sees it. The nearly empty bottle of JD on the desk and the knocked over glass that's spilling its remaining contents out across the paperwork

"Shit!" She starts to try to mop it up with some pieces of paper but getting nowhere she decides to give up and returns to leaning back in the chair. She picks up her cell phone and looks at it  
"Oh god! Is that the time already.. _fuck_! What the hell happened here?" She collapses back in the chair again and closes her eyes. She doesn't feel ready to move. Then there's a knock on the office door.

" _oh shit!_ " she doesn't want anyone to see her like this "Go away!.. I'm busy!" she pushes her fingertips deep into her temples to try to relieve the ache

"Catherine?... Catherine, are you alright? It's Daniel. Can I come in?" The door opens anyway "Catherine ...?"

"Christ Daniel! I said go away, I'm busy!"

He stops dead in his tracks in the doorway and looks at the broken glass on the floor and the drink spilling out all over the desk "Oh my god! What the hell's been going on?" he frowns "What the hell have you been doing?"

"Just don't, alright... I said go away" she doesn't move from the chair just opens her eyes to look at him

"Catherine... Jeez, I thought you were on top of this?"

"I was. I mean I am. It's just a blip"

"What happened?"

Ignoring him she leans back in the chair and again closes her eyes "Nothing!"

"Well something, obviously to cause this" he points round the room and then picks up a file from the wet mess on the desk and puts it in the trash "You gonna tell me what?"

She thinks for a moment and lets out a long-resigned sigh "Yeah...yeah Jason!."

"What?" he frowns at her "What do you mean, _Jason?_ "

She opens her eyes looking at the ceiling biting her lip thinking "I saw him. Yesterday. He was at the Grand, when I left"

"What the hell was he doing there?"

She shrugs as she sits up "He was with Mandy Ellis. I don't know why they're here?" she reaches in the top drawer of her desk and finds a tub of painkillers and she empties a random amount into her hand and looking around to find something to help wash them down the only option she has is to use what's left in the glass on her desk.

"Jesus Catherine! Will you stop!"

"Headache.. Advil! It's fine!" she sighs thinking that she wishes he would leave her alone

"Why was he at the hotel?" Daniel's now very suspicious "Do they know something?"

"Don't ask me, I don't know... I think it's just a coincidence... well I hope" she sighs "I guess um ... must be business whatever they're here for. It's a central hotel and ...it's on government list for expenses?" she laughs "Isn't that why Matt uses it?"

"Catherine it's not funny. Did they see you?"

"Seriously?... Do you think I'd be sitting here if Jason had seen me?" she frowns "Well, do you?"  
she leans forward with her head in her hands.

"Shit!" He rubs his head and sighs thinking "What are you gonna do?"

She shrugs "Nothing for now. I need to find out why she's here, and why she brought Jason? _And_ Why she didn't go to Mexico. I thought looking for this _Rita_ was supposed to be her Holy grail."

"I was told it was. Catherine just don't do anything stupid, just tread carefully"

"Please... give me some credit!"

"Well you need to stay away from the hotel for a start...and _him,_ until they leave"

She looks up at him making a face as she sighs and rubs her aching head as she looks again at the mess on her desk "Look I need to go back to mine and clean up ... can you get someone to come sort this mess out?"

He nods "Sure!" he watches her. "Are you alright?" He can see her thinking "Catherine you're not planning on doing anything stupid are you?"

The door to the office is still open and Matt walks without knocking. She closes her eyes lets out a long sigh _shit! That's all I need"_

Daniel looks at Matt and rolls his eyes. Matt frowns at the mess on the desk "What happened there?"

"Seems my sister has had, a small _setback_ "

"Catherine...Catherine are you alright? What's going on?"

She picks up her bag "Just don't start .. there's no _setback_. I'm fine, it's nothing to get concerned about"

"Well you don't look fine, you look hungover. If you've drunk all that then it is something to be concerned about"

She ignores him, heading to the doorway

"Catherine, Wait! .. Do you want me to book you a meeting?"

"NO!No, I don't want anything, alright! Just ..just leave me alone, both of you"

"Catherine!"

She puts her hand up "Just stop, okay? I've got this" she's holding her aching head as she heads out the door

Matt looks at Daniel and sighs loudly "What the hell's gone on?"

Daniel looks away unsure whether to speak "Daniel? Do you know something?" he frowns "Because apart from a few words we had she was fine when she left the hotel. So, what pushed her to this?"

"It's um..." Daniel lets out a long sigh "..it's Jason, it would seem he's staying at your hotel!"

"What? Jason Hayes?! But why?"

"Why indeed? " Daniel rubs his head "She saw him as she left last night"

"Did she speak to him?" Matt now frowns concerned "Has he come here for her? I thought him and her were over?"

"They are... over, permanently! He's here with Mandy Ellis, and no...no she didn't speak to him, thank god!" he rubs his head taking a breath

"But all this obsession, the photos, the surveillance..." he picks up a photo off the desk and holds it up "... she's trying to justify why she's watching him. She says he's a threat. So, what's that all about if they're over?"

"This..." he points at the files and the photos "..this is not about watching him, Jason." he sighs "Dammit! Jeez, I knew something like this would happen. I knew it would be too hard to get her to stay away"

"Something like what? Why would she need to stay away? Daniel what the hell is going on?"

"Look..."He thinks for a moment about whether he should say anything ".. you can't tell her I told you this, because trust me she won't thank me. But um...you probably should know, because I do actually think you care and cos... I'm gonna need help keeping an eye on her. Keeping her distracted" He bites his lip "It's not Jason she's obsessed with, it's the kid. Hayes kid. That's who she's keeping a watch on"

"I don't understand. Why? Why would she want to keep an eye on _his_ kid?"

Daniel pauses and swallowing nervously as he stares at Matt "Because...because the kid is hers"

"What?! Wait... I don't understand" he's taken aback and frowns with even more confusion "She always told me she couldn't have kids."

"She can't, not anymore.." Matt looks at Daniel his face asking a hundred questions "There were complications, after a second child ... I mean second pregnancy. Look I really shouldn't be telling you any of this so keep it to yourself. The last thing I need is her angry at me"

Matt stands shaking his head in disbelief "I don't understand. All those counselling sessions we had, and she never mentioned anything about having a child. Surely she'd have told me. I mean it would have come up. How the hell did she keep something like that secret?"

Daniel laughs "You underestimate Catherine ability to lie, keep secrets, to hide what she doesn't want the world to know" He watches Matt's reaction "You don't get it do you? She said what she needed to say to get through those evals to get herself back to work. You don't seriously think you got the truth do you?" he laughs "The only truth you got was the one she wanted to give you. Oh, you might think you're good at what you do but you're not that good" he laughs and shakes head "Catherine on the other hand, lying, she's the best at that. Even I don't know all her secrets."

"I don't understand"

"You don't need to, all _we_ need to do is make sure she stays away from Jason Hayes, _and_ Mandy Ellis!"

"Why you think she'll try to see him?"

"I hope not because if she does, then it's going to get seriously complicated, but I really don't know not after this" he points at the mess on the desk "We just need to make sure she doesn't"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Mandy and Jason meet the hotel restaurant, her friend, Toby, is waiting. He's a small geeky looking guy and nothing that Jason imagined, especially since Mandy said there was _a college thing_ between them. No, Toby is not what he had in his head.

"Toby hi! It's been too long" she air kisses his cheek as he holds his handkerchief to his mouth. You can tell he's excited to see her but shaking with nerves

"Mandy! Nice to see you again"

Jason laughs out loud he's thinking about imagining them together when he realizes they are looking him. He checks himself and put his hand out to shake but Toby looking Jason up and down refuses the gesture

"Hello Jason, pleased to meet you. Mandy's told me a lot about you!" he coughs and smiles at Mandy. He looks up staring at Jason wondering who he is, and why he's so large.

"Um...Toby this is... this is my friend, Jason. Don't worry he's fine. He's all cool. He's cleared" she smiles as she knows how nervous of strangers he is

"Okay!" he nods apprehensively

"Please, sit. You want something to drink?"

"Um... yeah a whiskey, whiskey on the rocks. Please I'm a little nervous, you know how I hate public spaces"

"Okay!" Jason frowns wondering how the hell this nervous guy can help them. His brain still trying to imagine him and Mandy together "I'll go get the drinks, you can talk"

Toby leans in over the table in a quiet hushed voice "Mandy you know I don't like strangers that I wasn't expecting"

"Yeah I know I'm sorry, it was a last-minute thing but seriously .. I trust him, really I do"

"Hmmm! Okay... so, what can I do for you Mandy?"

Mandy pushes the file across the table "I need details of who is behind this offshore trust account. I need to know who's putting the money in and um..." she looks round making sure no one, not even Jason hears her " this bit needs to be between us only. I need you to get into this person's..." she pushes the name on a piece of paper "personal and medical records. It's locked down and there is no way to access it."

"Seriously?" He frowns and looks at the paper then opens the beige file "Mandy, the financial deep search that's pretty routine for the CIA. You don't need to pay me to do that" he looks at the name on the piece of paper "The personal and medical files on the other hand, depending on _who_ this person is? I'm guessing you've had no luck, then it might take a little more work"

"Yeah thats the thing all this should be pretty routine like you say, but it's not, and that's the problem. I'm not getting anywhere through any normal channels, any channels. No one can find anything or..." she looks around "...or they won't even look. They send it back"

"Really?" He frowns this information concerns him "Thats a little more troubling "

"That's what I need you to find out, what's going on with this"

"It's not such a simple job then." he swallows nervously "This concerns me more than I first thought when you asked me. This person must be pretty well protected. I mean that much security... I don't know Mandy." Jason returns and puts the drinks on the table and Toby smiles his thanks. Taking the glass in both his shaking hands he drinks " Mandy if you can't find this through _your_ people then this... this could be seriously ... I mean like .. dangerous territory. So, the name on this account, do you know who the beneficiary is? May be I can start there, work backwards"

She bites her lip and looks up at Jason "Um... if its legit then it's for ...for Jason's son"

"What? I don't understand. What's a child's trust account gotta do with a government agency?"

"This is not to do with his son, its who's behind the account I need to know. I think this has something to do with the child's mother or possibly his grandfather?"

"Why? Who's his grandfather?"

She pauses and hushes her voice remembering where she is and who may be around "His grandfather _was_ Admiral Roger Lewis"

Shit! Toby frowns "Seriously?" he looks up at Jason "He was your son's Grandfather?"

Jason's puzzled but nods

"Toby this is why I need your help. I know you can do this" she smiles at him trying to reassure him

He shakes his head and drinks more of his drink "I don't know this... this is.." _Pheww!_ He takes a deep anxious breath "It's gonna take a bit of looking in to I'm gonna have tread very carefully I can't afford to alert any attention. I mean if they want this hidden enough that you can't find it then they want it hidden for a reason. That reason will come with a cost. I don't know Mandy" he's starting to have reservations about helping her and toys nervously with the cover of the file "I've been trying to stay out of this type of black ops stuff. Stay legit. I'm not sure I wanna get back into that world"

"Can you do it or not?" Jason's annoyed and he frowns "If you can't just say now save wasting our time"

"Yes!" Toby looks at Mandy he's annoyed by Jason's tone "Yes can do it, but that's not the point" he drinks some more "the point is do I _want_ to do it, get involved." he finishes his drink "Alright, I will do it, for you. But as well as the money I need a favor in return"

"Okay yeah, sure name it!"

"I have a.. "he coughs "...a friend, a good friend. He's stuck in Venezuela jail. Possession of narcotics, he's been there a year, I need him sent home"

"Okay.." She nods "okay, yeah that can be done!" she smiles "Toby, thank you and just let me know if you need anything else"

"Oh, I will you owe me for this!" She hands him the file as he finishes up his drink. "I'm not promising anything, but I'll be in touch. and I'll send you a link, for a secure email server. Only contact me though that from now on. You understand. I'll send any documents or things I find to it. Goodbye Mandy"

"Goodbye Toby. Take care"


	56. Chapter 56

Daniel enters the office; he doesn't knock just opening the door walking in.

"Um...the door is closed, for a reason!" Catherine opens her eyes "Because I'm busy!"  
She's neither busy, nor can he see her. She's sitting in the large leather office chair with her back to the door.

He throws the file in his hand down, the noise as they hit the desk gets her attention and slowly she turns the chair around and looks at him and then down at the files. "What are they?"

He gestures towards them "One, is a contract that needs you to look over and authorize and um... the other, well take a look"

She chews her gum staring at him as she opens the cover on the first file and does a quick scan read. She nods, rubbing her chin and letting out another long sigh "So do they know when the arms shipment will arrive?"

"Yeah!" he nods "The date and time is in the file"

"Okay.. thanks, I'll look at it later" she sighs rubbing her hand through her head. Daniel doesn't move, continuing to stare at her and she frowns as she watches him watching her "Why do I have a feeling that's not what you want me to look at?" He still doesn't say a word and she frowns again "Fine!" She lifts the cover on the second file and looks even more puzzled as she studies the photos contained inside "What's this?"

She pulls out a photograph of Mandy and Jason, they're at a table with a guy she doesn't recognize. There are more pictures of this guy on his own "So, who is this?" she frowns as she studies the pictures

"He's the reason Agent Ellis came to Washington"

Catherine looks at him puzzled and shrugs "and?... Am I supposed to know who he is?"

"No but I do... Toby Asker, security analyst at the Pentagon. He went to college with Mandy Ellis ... he's also on the government hacker watch list, for most of his career but now does legitimate, _authorized_ cyber system testing. Been arrested twice overseas on espionage and hacking charges. Both times the CIA brought him home under Ellis's authorization... so now the pentagon keep him under their wing. To prevent him going elsewhere"

"So, he's good hacker!" she shrugs "There's plenty of those. What do Ellis, and Jason, want with him? I take it, it's more than a college catch up?"

Daniels coughs "We did a deep log search, from a computer used by him. It shows a hack attempt on government personnel files" he pauses but there's no hint of serious interest from her "It wasn't a general, random hack , but a more specific one, veiled as an outside security threat"

She's still frowning at him, unimpressed and still not understanding his point but she's fed up now "Okay ... Daniel seriously what am I missing here? You're annoying me now, so just get to the point"

"The target of the hack..." he pauses "..was you!"

"What?" She frowns while she thinks " I don't understand"

"He was attempting gain access to your personnel records, but more specifically your medical records. The files she couldn't access under her own clearance. It looks like she's attempting to go under the radar to get them"

He's got her full attention now "And did he? Did he get in?"

"We're um... we're not hundred percent sure, what he got, before our people shut him down!"

"You're not sure? Why the hell not? C'mon Daniel, you must know something? Jesus this is important!" she's frustrated, angry that Mandy is snooping around her information again.  
She swallows hard "If she gets into those medical records well...well then she's gonna know, about me!" she rubs her head trying to think "Is there anything on there from the last six months?"

"Some.. the um ...pregnancy and um...Matt's session notes are on there"

"What? Shit!" she closes her eyes and leans her head back in the chair "So she's gonna wonder how I had counseling when... when I didn't exactly need it! This is bad" she leans forward with her elbow on the desk rubbing her head trying to think.

"Yeah and the other thing ..." he stops for a moment he can see she's angry and he doesn't want to make it worse "he um... he had more stuff, on his laptop. Financial records. They relate to an offshore trust account; do you know what that's about?"

She swallows nervously and closes her eyes to think "Shit!..God dammit!" she pushes the files off the desk in frustration. "This is Ellis and her snooping! I tell ya that woman. I'm gonna..." _urggghh! .. Fuck! "_ She's gonna pay for this!"

"So, what is it? The account.. what does it mean? Whats it for?"

She shakes her head calming herself "it's um... something personal. Some money of mine" she sighs "Does it matter?"

Daniel shrugs "Not to me but why would Ellis be interested in the account?"

CJ rubs her head trying to decide what to tell Daniel "It's just an account. I've been putting money in...until it's needed"

"Until it's needed?" he frowns "Needed for what? I don't get it, who's account is it?"

"It's um..." She takes a deep breath and sighs "it's for my son. It's a trust account, that I set up for him" she sees the look on his face "Look, Jason's gonna need money, for the future. Things for JC. I just wanted to make sure he has what he needs"

"Well that was stupid" he laughs "How the hell were you gonna give him money without him asking questions?"

She glares at him "I had it planned it was in trust. It wasn't stupid. Look, if I can't _see_ my son because of what _you_ did, then I need to do something. Daniel, I am his mother for god sake. You know sometimes I think you forget that" she grinds her teeth trying to stay calm. "This is the only way I can help him. Like, I said, he'll need things. Things Jason can't provide on his own."

Daniel shakes his head and as she continues to glare at him "Look..." she has the stern look on her face now " _You_... you put me in this position, so you let _me_ deal with it, my way now! All of this, ... this would have been fine if it wasn't for Ellis sniffing around. She's a liability"

"So, what do you want to do?"

"We need to deal with this. Shut them down!"

"The hacker. I've already had him dealt with."

"Good! You did something right for a change. What happened?"

"Well... news reports say it was just a tragic road accident" he smiles "Seems, he wasn't paying attention when he crossed the street, a car hit him. Died at the scene. Nothing extraordinary, will soon be forgotten"

"You get his computer first though, right?"

"Yeah ... yeah, we're going through it now. There's actually some very useful information on it" he smiles

"Do we know if he sent Ellis, my information?"

"Yeah ... unfortunately we think he sent a secured email. We're working on getting into it now"

"SHIT!" she thinks for a minute "Okay, well she won't have told Jason, not until she's sure. In the meantime, we need to deal with her" She bites her lip thinking "Dangle that Rita... Alfaro, the cartel informant, put her in front of her, make it so she can't resist. Just get her to Mexico. We'll deal with her there"

"If that's what you want then I'll arrange it"

"I mean now, today Daniel! I want her away from Jason. Right now!" she stares at him "Make it urgent enough that she needs to leave on the next flight out"

"Okay sure"

Deep inside Daniel's scared. His knows his sister will stop at nothing when she wants something and this...this just got personal and now he's worried for Mandy, because if he's honest, he really likes her. They got on great when he went down to Virginia Beach, and they've been in contact ever since. He sighs. _Maybe Catherine's going too far this time!_  
This whole Jason obsession that she has going on. He wonders if Mandy's got herself in too deep this time. Perhaps someone needs to stop this before it gets even further out of control. He almost feels sorry for her now. Mandy's in his sisters' cross hairs, and he knows, that's never a good place to be. He frowns "Catherine, are you are okay? You're not gonna do anything stupid?"

"I'll be fine. Just get her to Mexico, I'll sort the rest!"

"Hey!" Matt smiles as he walk in as the door which is still is still open. "Hey!"

Daniel nods as they stop talking. "Yeah fine!

"Why wouldn't we be?"

"I don't know?" he frowns "There something going on, I should know about?" he can see the look on her face and all the files on the floor. It concerns him.

"No!... No nothing. Look Matt we're busy, did you want something?"

"Just um...I wondered if you want some lunch?"

"Yeah..." She looks at her watch and thinks for a moment "Yeah sure, why not." she smiles "I think we're done here anyway. Thanks Daniel. I'll leave you to sort that other matter"

"Sure" Daniel nods "Matt I'll um... I'll catch you later"

"So, anything I should know about? You look a bit concerned"

"No!" she smiles "No nothing of interest. Come on let's go get something to eat" she ushers him out of the door. Matt watches her as she picks her jacket and purse from the chair. He smiles hesitantly because he doesn't believe her.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They've been eating for fifteen minutes, she's hardly said a word. Matt's watching her as she picks at her food "You okay, you've hardly said anything"

"Yeah.. sorry , just not very hungry and I'm a bit tired. I've got a lot on my mind"

"A lot on your mind?" he nods as he stares at her " Anything I can help with?"

"No, no nothing important" she smiles and takes a sip of her water.

"So, nothing like um ... Jason Hayes, for instance?"

"Oh _please_ Matt..." she sighs ".. not this again" She frowns as she drops her fork down and pushes the plate away and takes another sip of the water. The waiter walks past she grabs his arm "Bring me a large glass of white wine... please!"

Matt stares at her "Hit a nerve did I?"

"No! I just don't want to keep talking about this."

" _This..._ being Jason Hayes?" The waiter brings the wine to the table and pours a glass "You think that's a good idea?"

She's annoyed "You know what... leave the bottle. Thank you!" she stares at Matt who shakes his head.

"So, what ? You're gonna get drunk now. Blur it out"

"Maybe! Who knows" she shrugs "Guess we'll see when I finish this bottle"?

"Catherine, this happens every time his name's mentioned. Why is that? If it's not him bothering you why do you do this?" She laughs and starts to drink the wine and then refills the glass. She knows it will provoke a reaction, and it does as he frowns at her "Why do you carry on with the surveillance on him, if he means nothing to you?"

"I told you why Now can we just drop it" she keeps drinking the wine and staring at him.

"So, you're gonna drink all of that?"

"Yeah, maybe and maybe I'll even order another. Who knows yet?!" She stares at him

"Yeah!" He laughs "Yeah that's a really great idea .. you do that Catherine" He drinks from his glass as he tries to keep himself calm with her, but she has this way of making him so annoyed and he knows she knows it "See I don't think it is Jason, that you're interested in"

"Really?" She watches him over the top of her wine glass as she drinks some more "Then tell me in your wisdom, as you know me so well, what is?"

"No, I've been thinking about it .. and I think it's his kid! That's really who you're interested in, isn't it" She tries not to react and looks away, but he continues to probe "What is it, about that child? It's it because you can't have your own you adopted his or is there more to it Catherine?"

She lets out a long-annoyed sigh "I don't know Matt; you tell me as you seem to have it all figured out!" He takes some paperwork out of his jacket and throws it on the table, she frowns "What's that?"

"How about _you_ tell me?"

She looks at him as she opens the paperwork and starts to read. She looks up after a few moments "Where the fuck did you get this?" she frowns "Have you been checking up on me?"

"What's it about?"

P _heww!_ She sighs angrily "Well you can see what it is!"

"Yeah I can. So, who's bank account is it?"

"It's mine!"

"No! No, it's not!"

She lets out a deep long breath and takes a large drink of the wine "Okay you know what I'll tell you ... it's a trust account, and yes it's for Jason's boy. To help him out, college stuff like that." she carries on drinking staring hard at Matt "Oh come on Matt, I spent a lot of time with him, when Jason and I were together. I like the boy and if I can help then ... then the time me and Jason had it won't have been so wasted. Honestly that's all it is, a college fund if you want!" she smiles and continues to drink the wine

"No! No, I'm not buying it either." he just sits and stares at her "it's not like you to be concerned about anyone like that, and anyway where did you get that kind of money?"

"Is that what it's about, the money?" she laughs " The amount of money? Jeez Matt, it's my money I can do what I like with it"

"Yeah you can but how they hell did you get _your_ hands on that amount of money " he leans over the table and hushes his voice "Jesus Christ Catherine ...there's nearly $500 000 dollars in there, in less than six months"

She bites her lip she's angry now she looks around "Matt, how many months have we worked together? You should know by now not to ask those sorts of questions around here" she stares at but shows no sign of emotion. She takes another drink and finishes the wine and refills another glass.

As he shakes his head, annoyed and angry she decides to changes tact with him "Matt..." she smiles "Matt c'mon, forget this!" she screws the paper work up "Tell you what, why don't we order another bottle of wine to go, take it back to mine? We can .. _.. talk_ there!" She smiles again flirting with him putting her hand on his. "Come on what you say. We've got the whole afternoon to do whatever you like"

He pulls his hand back "So, you don't have anything to say?" He's stony faced not reacting to her flirting. He knows it just her ploy, so she doesn't have to discuss what they're talking about

Her smiles drops and she watches him "What do you want from me, Matt?" she shrugs "I've told you what it is so, what else do you want me to say?"

"The truth might be a start, instead of all these lies"

 _Hmmm!_ She smiles, laughing to herself "Oh Okay, I get it _now!_ Daniel!..." she frowns "He's been talking to you, hasn't he. So why keep playing this game when it's obvious you already know the truth?" she sneers watching the look on his face "I should have known Daniel wouldn't be able to keep his mouth shut!"

"Well its funny your brother can .."

" _Half_ -brother!"

"Oh, sorry your _half-_ brother, can tell me the truth. but in all these months and even now I've given you every chance, but you still can't tell the truth." he shakes his head "Catherine, all those sessions, all that time together and what? You just lied to me the whole time. Was it all just a ploy to get me to sign the evaluation sheets?" he frowns "And what about me and you, is that a lie too? Jesus Catherine, do you even know what the truth is anymore?"

She shrugs she's so angry now "I don't know, you tell me. You're the shrink!" she knocks the wine back and pours the last glass

"So it is that the truth? Hayes kid, Jaycee, he's your child."

"Does it matter?"

"Yes, it matters!... Catherine you have a child and the only way you see him is through surveillance pictures? What the hell's wrong with you? Why doesn't Jason let you see him? Is there a problem? I'm sure something could be arranged; we could sort access. But all these photographs, surveillance it's gotta stop! It's not normal. For god sake, you don't need to do that!"

"What the fuck are you doing?" she laughs

"I'm saying... if..."

"No, I hear what you're _saying_ but you know what you sound like?" she laughs out loud " This is not some therapy session Matt" she drinks the last of the glass of wine back "Excuse me ..."  
she calls the waiter "Can I get another bottle please" She watches Matt whilst trying to control her temper. "YES! Yes, Jaycee is my son. But no... no I can't see him but that's nothing to do with Jason. That's because of...because of Daniel!"

She bites her lip taking a deep breath "Look its complicated, and no shrink talk will fix it. There's no custody, no arranged visits, I can't have any contact. So, the surveillance, that is my only way. Trust me!" She fills her glass from the new bottle that arrives at the table

"Catherine stop please! Don't do this. Alright, let's do what you said, go back to yours and talk"

"I don't think so .. talking time is over. I think I'll stay here, finish my lunch" she raises her glass.

"Catherine.. please!" He gives another disapproving look

"Oh you know what Matt just go! Go back to your hotel and leave me the _fuck_ alone" She rubs her head and looks away

"Catherine..."

"Just go, alright just go! You can't understand so just ..." she gestures for him to leave "go!"

"Fine!" he throws his napkin on the table. "Have it your way, enjoy your lunch!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Hey!"

"Hey, did you get anything sorted?"

"I've got some emails to check through but yes. He sent some other things through I need to check out later"

"Can I see?"

"I can't get hold of Toby, I just need to check on some things first, but I'll keep trying him on the flight. As soon as I have something concrete I'll let you know, I promise!"

"Flight? " he frowns "You're leaving?"

"Yeah something came up ..." She smiles as he frowns at her "Look Jason, I shouldn't really be telling you this but, they ...they've got her, Rita Alfaro. They're holding until I get to Mexico .. I'm going straight there now to pick her up." She smiles again "We got her Jason. We really got her!"

"That's great! So, you want me to come back with you?"

"No! No nothing you can do. You stay enjoy the hotel one more night...your flights booked back tomorrow anyway" she smiles and looks at her watch "look I've got to catch my flight, but I'll call you when I get there.."

"Okay.. guess it's your luck and BRAVO miss out on the action this time!"

"Yeah!...I guess so.. " she laughs "Sorry. Tell you what I'll find you something good to make up when I get back!"

" I'm holding you to that." he looks at seeing her face beam with excitement and relief at finally getting Rita after all this time "Mandy, be careful down there, you know what it's like"

"I will!" she kisses his cheek "I'll see you when I get back"

He puts his hand on the back of her head running his fingers in her hair "Just watch yourself Okay?" he pulls her in and gives her a full-on kiss. She steps back and frowns at him

"Okay? That was nice but now I'm confused.. what was that for?"

"I just felt like it" he smiles

"Okay..." she smiles back "well, maybe we could do that again when I get back?"

"Yeah maybe we could" She bites her lip as she walks away. She's feeling relaxed and happy. Everything's coming together Rita finally caught and now looks like she has Jason too.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

Matt arrives back at the Grand hotel.

Catherine's made him so mad but also he's worried about leaving her, especially as she's drinking. Now wondering if he should go back and check on her. _Shit!_ He rubs his head then instead of heading to his room he heads to the bar.

He's in a world of his own not thinking and bumps into the tall brunette hurriedly leaving the bar. He looks back she catches his attention he thinks he recognizes her. He frowns but he can't remember from where but as he gets to the bar and orders, he's still thinking about the woman he just passed

"Large whiskey please" he pulls up a stool in front of the bar and as the drink arrives he just knocks it straight back. "I'll have another! Actually keep 'em coming"

Catherine just has this way of just making him so frustrated and angry. Normally he's calmer with his patients but her _. She's just so damn annoying! Fuck!_  
He knows it's because he cares, because he thinks he might even be in love with her.

"Bad day?"

He looks up at the voice beside him, and as turns around, he nearly chokes on his drink. _Jason Hayes!_ Sitting on the stool next to him at the bar "Um..." he looks around "yeah! Yeah you could say that" he smiles

"Yeah !" Jason nods "Yeah I know the feelin' had a few of those myself recently. Can I um.. can I get you another? Hate to drink alone and my ... my partner just left"

"Um ...yeah sure! Why not?" Matt smiles this feels really all wrong but something, curiosity, makes him want to stay and chat.

"Oh, by the way, I'm Jason"

"Hi, um... Matt! So, you staying here?"

"Couple days, just business." He drinks from his glass "Don't tell me, woman troubles?"

"Yeah" Matt laughs "Yeah, kinda, how did you know?"

"Yeah well I've had a few of those recently, too"

"You married?" Matt frowns

Jason thinks wondering how to go about saying this. He never wants to make anyone feel uncomfortable but there's no other way to say it when someone asks so he just says it now  
"No! No not anymore. She um .. my wife, she died"

"Oh wow Look, I'm so sorry, that's really tough."

"It's okay, I'm getting there slowly You learn to live with it"

Matt nods and drinks his drink "She with you? The brunette that just left."

"Um... yeah. Oh that, it's a work thing" Jason smiles

"Not that it's the same thing but I'm divorced. That was hard enough" Matt looks at his drink thinking about this situation "You ever think about moving on, getting someone else, in the future. I mean it's hard I know, from being divorced. That's hard enough to move on from but it's something you think about right?"

"Yeah, think about, do. Yeah. I um... I did have someone for a while. I mean I'd known her a long time, but you know things... they um... didn't work out back then" Jason shakes his head and drinks the last from his glass "I'll have another" he points to the barman

"I'm sorry." Matt also drinks "Yeah I'll have another here too. Hardest part for me is I've got a kid and the ex ... she um... she won't let me see her, that's tough to live with. Knowing your kid's growing up and you can't see them. Tough on anyone that!"

"Yeah I can't imagine not seeing mine. I got three" he smiles "Yeah, yeah single Dad I know ...and yes.." He sighs " it's hard especially with my job and all. Thank god for my Mom helping out and um... I've got some good friends. A good Team round me" he smiles

"WOW! That's great! I mean that they were able to stay with you!"

"Yeah .. my daughters away at college, in New York, but my boys are with me."

"They um ...were they with your wife?" Matt's getting more daring in his questioning of Jason

"The two oldest are. The little one, Jaycee, he's um.. "Jason smiles "he's with my ... he _was_ my ex, CJ, he was hers" he swallows hard his emotions starting to build he looks at his drink in his glass

"CJ? "Matt frowns "Oh is she your girlfriend? Ex? I mean does she him. Have contact?"

Jason shakes his head "She can't?" he rubs his head and drinks some more and beckons the barman over and points at the glass for a refill

"What? She doesn't want to see her son?" he laughs dismissively "It's not something you hear often, a mother who doesn't wanna see her kids?"

"It's not like that .. she um .. she can't. She can't because she's ... " Jason closes his eyes he's not sure if he can say the words. If he's ready to admit to a stranger that CJ's dead "Look she was in a bad place and I couldn't help her. She um... took an overdose, she didn't make it."

Jason knocks the drink back turning the empty glass around and around in his hand. That hurt, saying it out loud. But then in some ways he needed to. He needed to say it, to start to accept that she was gone.

"Oh my god! " Matt frowns trying to comprehend what Jason just told him "I um... I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to pry like that. But that's ... that's awful, such tragedy"

"Yeah... yeah it really is" Jason orders another drink

"No that's really a lot to deal with. Puts my troubles to shame"

"Hey man we all got our own problems. But yeah... yeah it's not easy. But... I'm getting there. It's been about six months, so... look sorry you don't wanna be hearing my problems So, what's sent you running to the whiskey bottle?"

It's now dawning on Matt the depths that he can't imagine of Catherine's lies _. Jeez!_ he thinks what would cause her to tell such a lie and not see her son? He can't understand it and all that time he's spent with her and he knew none of this. "Oh, my um... Oh, it was just a stupid argument really! She...my girlfriend, she's as frustrating as hell!" he sighs

"You love her?"

 _"Hmmm!_ " You know, that's a hard one!" he lets out a deep breath "I suppose.. Yeah! I guess I do... But god she makes it so damn hard! She's not the most open and honest person"

"She must have something though; make you act crazy like this? I mean she must be something special, right? Special enough that you sit in a bar talking to strangers about her"

"Well..." Matt smiles "she's great in the bedroom, if you mean that? But the rest, yeah that's something else. That's something, if I'm honest, I don't know if I can deal with"

Jason smiles "Yeah .. yeah I know that feeling. CJ, god she was like that" he laughs thinking about her "Jeez she was as frustrating as hell but something over the years, something just kept bringing us back together. We had this connection. We understood each other. What excited us, danger, our jobs. I didn't have to explain with her, she got it" Jason sighs "So how long you been seeing, this girl of yours?"

"Oh, couple months. She won't commit to anything serious. She...she likes life on the edge not a play by the rules kinda person. I'm not even sure if she's over her ex yet. There are a lot of issues there"

Hmmm! Jason sighs "Well that's not good. You need all in or it's never gonna work. So, is he still on the scene, her ex I mean? Is he around to make it complicated"?

Matt's smiles to himself about the continuing conversation. He feels bad now, like he's deceiving Jason. But though he thinks it's wrong, he just wants to know about Catherine's time with him. He wants to understand her, get her. Connect like Jason seems to.

"Not exactly on the scene no. She um... she sees him every now and again but he's over her I think. It's her that can't let it go..." he looks at his drink "Then there's the fact, she has a ... has a well she has a drink problem " Matt sighs rubbing his hand over his head "Sorry. God, I'm sorry I'm unloading on you now. That's the last thing you need" he smiles

"No, you're okay. Us guys have to stick together, right" Jason smiles there's something about Matt that's easy to talk to, and god knows he hasn't been able to open up to any one like this before "You want another drink, Matt?"

"Yeah sure. I just need the men's room, but I'll have another large whiskey." he puts his hand on Jason's shoulder firm but friendly "Thanks, thanks for listening" he smiles patting Jason on the back.

"No worries" he smiles, turning to the barman to order as he does he notices Matt's left his phone on the bar. It flashes with a missed call message. 'Catherine' he frowns checking the screen.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Catherine lets herself into her apartment _SHIT!_ She crashes on top of the bed covers and closes her eyes "Oh my god! I should not have done that" as she lays there, the room is spinning around her. She can feel the effects of the wine she drank. She sits up Fuck!

She rubs her head and picks up her phone to make a call, but it goes to voice mail "Matt it's Catherine. Pick up! I'm sorry... I shouldn't have behaved like that, said those things. Just come to the apartment, let's talk... Please." She then throws the cell onto the bed and sighs "I need a shower"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Ahh! There it is. I just wondered what I did with that" he smiles at Jason picking up his cell from the bar.

"Yeah you had a call, while you were gone."

Matt looks at it then at Jason "Right thanks" he feels a bit on edge seeing the name of the missed caller.

"Everything okay?"

"Yeah... yeah I'll call her back later!"

Jason looks around the hotel bar "Hey you know what, how about we find another bar with a bit more life?"

"Um...yeah sure. Why not!" Matt's a little bit apprehensive thinking about what he's doing but he's also curious to find out more about Jason and Catherine's relationship

They step outside the hotel and Jason looks down the street "I think there's a great sports bar just down there, or well... there used to be" Jason points "Went there a couple of times before when I was here in the past"

"Okay sure!" Matt smiles. The psychiatrist inside him thinking he'll go with somewhere Jason's comfortable with so he'll feel more relaxed to talk "I don't normally do sports bars but..." he laughs "change would be good"

They start to walk down the street as they do they pass the entrance to a side alley and then out of nowhere, Jason shoves Matt down it. "Hey! " Matt's startled he wasn't expecting this " Hey! What the hell's going on?" he swallows hard as Jason starts to scare him "this is not the way to the bar!"

"No, no you're right it's not!" Jason shoves him hard against the wall and holds him there.

Matt gulps nervously, he panics Jason's so strong he can't fight back. "What 's going on?"

"Your phone. Who was the woman that called it?"

"Woman? What woman?"

Jason grabs the collar to his shirt and slams him back hard against the brick wall "The one that called your phone?"

"I don't know I have no idea. I don't know what you're talking about. Look, just let me go and I'll leave. I won't call the police"

"Police?" Jason laughs "I don't think. Tell me! Who... is ... she? Who is Catherine, the missed call I saw the name"

"Oh yeah, right, um... the woman I'm seeing, the one I told you about" Matt tries to loosen Jason's grip "Just let me go okay"

"It's her isn't it?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about"

"Really, coincidence you come to the bar, where _I'm_ drinkin', and you start discussing ,talking about a woman called Catherine?"

Matt's worried but doesn't say anything about the caller "Look Jason... you might be a Navy Seal, but doesn't mean you can just go around threatening people"

"How the hell..."Jason steps back "I never told you that! About me being a SEAL, so how'd you know? Who the hell are you?"

Matt closes his eyes realizing his mistake. "No one... I'm just a psychiatrist like I said, please... it was just a guess, I have no idea what you're talking about"

Next thing he drops to the floor as Jason punches him full strength, hard in the stomach "Oh, I think you do!"

Matt coughs and splutters, holding his stomach his breathing is deep _Shit!_ "Oh my god, what is this all about?"

" I want the truth ...tell me the truth, is she _alive_? CJ is she alive"

Matt's doubled up on the floor. He shakes his head "I have no idea ... please .."

Jason grabs him pulling him to a standing position "Don't lie. I'm gonna get the truth ... remember this is what I do for a living. Get information from people"

Matt shrugs but now he's really scared. Scared of what Jason will do if he doesn't tell him and scared of what Catherine, and god knows who, will do if he does!

"Fine! Well we can do this one of two ways, easy or hard" he punches at him again and Matt drops to the floor "Your choice!"


	57. Chapter 57

**Chapter 57: stay with me, one more night**

Turning off the shower she steps out. Then wrapping herself in a towel she scrapes her wet hair back and clips it on top of her head. _Shit!_ She sighs, massaging the aching tension in her neck.

Headed into the lounge area Catherine hesitates. Stopping and taking a moment to think about things. As she wanders to the kitchen she looks up at the tall cabinet in front of her and she smiles, remembering that in the top of there, she placed a bottle of her father's favorite whiskey.

She lifts it down and takes a clean glass from the drainer before filling it with amber colored liquid. Savoring the smell she starts to drink

"Cheers dad!" she smiles.

It's a large open plan apartment and she places the glass on the dresser before heading to the bedroom just off to the side through the large sliding screen doors. She pulls open the closed and takes out a shirt and some black lace panties from the drawer. Pulling them on she looks up at the sound of a loud knocking at the front door.

"Who is it?" she frowns cautiously knowing she's really not expecting anyone.

"It's...it's Matt! Catherine, can I come in? I um... I want to .. to talk to you."

 _Shit!_ "Err... yeah ... yeah sure. Just a minute, I'm just getting dressed" She smiles, this now, is the perfect opportunity for her to win him around, get him back on her side.

Thinking quickly, she places the whiskey bottle inside the table that sits under the TV. Then gathering herself together, she tidies her hair and tugging her shirt down, it just about manages to cover her panties.

She smiles, undoing the first two buttons, showing her cleavage then checking her appearance in the large mirror by the door she takes a deep breath and opens it.

"Okay ...look Matt I'm so...rr..y..." Before her words even leave her mouth she reels backwards, something hard hitting her in the face. She lands with a thud her butt hitting the floor. The pain floods her face and she puts her hand to her mouth . _Aahhhhh Fuck!_ Dazed she shakes her head. Taking a minute to work out exactly what's happened.

She can't move just sitting there on the floor _What the hell? S_ he frowns, feeling like she's been hit in the head with a brick "Matt what the ..." She still she hasn't gathered her thoughts when she hears a voice screaming at her

" _Get the fuck up!_ "

Taking a minute to piece things together she sits upright. She doesn't immediately recognize the voice, her head blurred and confused "Matt?"

" I said, _GET UP!_ " Suddenly from nowhere someone grabs at her arm. She puts her hand up to protect herself as they pull her to her feet.

Her nose is bleeding, she can taste the blood on her swollen lip. "What the hell... Matt?!" she's snivelling back tears that the blow brought to her eyes. She looks up and immediately freezes on the spot. " _Jason!_.. _Oh my god!_ " Breathless she now realizes it's not Matt, who hit her "What the hell... " she holds her breath "How the hell did you ..."

Stunned for a moment she puts her fingers against her rapidly swelling cheek, rubbing it. She's so confused but she can see Jason has a hold of the collar on Matt's shirt "Did you bring him here?" she frowns "Did you tell him where I was? Jesus Christ Matt, how could you do that?"

She frowns, staring at Matt and now she can see all the bruising on his face, the cut to his cheek the red and blackness under his eyes. She knows can now tell that he didn't willingly tell Jason anything " _Shit Jason!_ What the hell did you do to him?"

"Oh, don't worry about him, it's you that needs to answer some questions!"

"Jason ..." she pleads as she steadies herself, her legs shaking with adrenaline rush and some fear "Jason please... please just let me explain"

She's scared and the only other time she's felt this afraid of him was in Harrington's office, the time when she had to explain about the files. The day he held her by the throat, she was concerned then about what he might do, just like now. Except seeing how angry he is right now, this.. this is far worse "Please ...please just give me a minute to explain."

"How the _fuck_ can you explain this?" he glares at her "And really, it's not me you need to explain to, no you need to explain to your son. Explain how his Mom is not actually dead, that really she just abandoned him." he sighs "Jesus Christ C.J, you just left us... _like that?_ What, oh c'mon, you can't tell me there was no other way. Did you just want to live out some new life, have your job back and just dump us? Who the hell does that to their kid?"

She shakes her head, tears of stress and pain run down her face. She wipes the blood from under her nose with her hand. Her face is a snotty we mess of smeared bodily fluids "Jason please... it wasn't like that.. this wasn't my fault" she snivels. Her hands are shaking as she tries to reach out to him, to try and touch him, trying to connect and explain.

"Get the hell off me!" he screams in her face as she touches his hand.

Matt tries to intervene he thinks Jason's going to hit her again "Catherine go call the police!"

She takes a breath, shaking her head "No! No, it's fine.. I deserve this!"

"You!" Jason aggressively, turns on Matt "You, get the hell out of here, I don't want to see you again!"

She swallows nervously as she holds herself back from full on crying. Jason has really hurt Matt; she can see by the state of his face. She has to admit, she's scared for him and though she can hardly speak, her voice cracking with emotions she tells him to go.

"No! No, I'm not leaving you with him. I'm getting the police"

"NO!" she shakes her head, grabbing his arm "Matt _please_... just go. I'll be fine, I will!"

"NO ... no way, look what he's done. He's an animal. He's dangerous"

"Matt!" she screams "Will you just go, _for fuck sake!_ "She can't think straight. She just wants him to leave "Look, just go back to your hotel, call Daniel. He'll sort it. Just tell him I'm fine. _MATT!_ For god sake, just do as I say"

"Alright..." Matt looks between them " .. okay! But you do _anything_ to her, and I'm getting the police and you ...you won't see your kids again you understand me?"

Matt's words rile Jason he turns on him watching him cower down. "You're threatening me?"

C.J intervenes "Jason please! Just leave him. It's me you're angry at not him. Matt just go ..now!"

"Fine! Have it your way. Jesus Christ you pair are unbelievable!" he can't understand what's happening, but he doesn't argue any further. He looks back at CJ as he gets to the door.

She nods "Matt, it's okay, really. Look, I'll call you later"

Her and Jason now just stand, staring at each other. She wipes the blood and tears from under her nose over her hand.

"So, let's hear it then, let's hear your sorry lies to explain this. Jesus C.J..." He shakes his head "you've pulled some stunts but this..."

She gulps at looks at the drink standing where she left it on the dresser. _Oh, what the hell!_ She goes to the side and gets some tissue, wiping her nose and face. She puts her hand to her cheek, it really hurts. Then in one mouthful she knocks the drink back and then reaching inside the cupboard, she retrieves the bottle she hid and pours another glass full.

"Jesus Christ" Jason shakes his head "You don't change"

She turns on him "What the _fuck_ does it matter to you? What... you walk in here, smack me in the face and then worry about me drinking? Are you for real, Jason." she sarcastically laughs "For god sake you've just beaten Matt half to death! What the hell's wrong with _you_?"

Tears are streaming down her face as she continues to suck them back. She's a complete mess. She holds her face again it's so sore and it really hurts. She gets another tissue and wipes it again. She takes a deep breath getting a grip on herself

"Seriously? You're asking me what's wrong with me? You're asking me that? What the hell's wrong with you. Who goes around letting people they _love_ think they're dead?"

"Me, I guess" she smiles, cockily laughing at him. She's trying to put out some attitude to protect herself from the emotions of seeing him again. She drinks some more drink "What the fuck do you want me to say Jason?"

She keeps smirking and her attitude is getting on his nerves. Once again, staring at her he's angry. Why is it she manages to stoke this fiery rage in him. He slaps her hard across the face

"FUCK!...Jason!" _Shit!_ She cries out, stamping her feet with the pain. She rubs her forehead and screws up her face trying to ease it. "Jason...jeez! What the hell was that for?"

"Why do you have to be like this? Drive me to this?! You're the one in the wrong but it's always everyone else's fault?"

"I'm sorry okay. I'm sorry!" she sits on the edge of the couch holding her face, tears rolling down her cheek "You're right... but you have to understand it wasn't me. I didn't want this"

She drinks from the glass getting her nerve to explain to him "I did take the tablets. The overdose. But then they brought me around, when I woke up, it was about a week later and I was in some rehab facility" she shakes her head taking a deep breath "The agency guys, that came to the hospital... they'd called my brother, Daniel. They got him to come and arrange things. He sent me there. He made all the arrangements at the hospital after. I didn't know what he'd done"

"Brother?" he frowns "I never knew you had a brother?"

"Well, he's my half-brother, really." she laughs, shaking her head "Yeah I know funny that. It would seem my father wasn't so perfect after all." she drinks from the glass and tops it up with the whiskey bottle she stood on the floor. She holds her lip, as she looks up at Jason he's standing with his arms folds listening to her.

She has this one chance to put things right so feels like she needs to explain it all. "He um... he had an affair. With one of his secretaries. He even put her up in a house, the whole works. She had this kid, Daniel, my brother" she smiles "I never begged him to save our careers ... I blackmailed him." she laughs, drinking more of the whiskey "I said I'd tell my mother, about the woman, the child and I'd expose him to everyone. You know my father; he didn't want that slur on his Navy record. My mother, the charities it would have looked so bad. Even you knowing that about him, he'd have hated it. So, he pulled the strings"

She smiles as she thinks about her mother, then looks at Jason and laughs "Funny thing you know, something that he didn't know. My mother already knew. It was her; she was the one told me" she laughs "It was my mother's payback. Giving me something to have control over him. Putting him in a position he had to do something for me" she smiles.

Then her smile drops, there is a pain in her jaw. Jason waivers for a moment seeing the pain in her eyes and her rubbing her cheek and he doesn't know why but he gently takes hold of her face. "Let me look" he feels gently around her jaw and rubs her cheek "it's not broken, but still... I shouldn't have done that. I'm sorry. I went too far. I lost it, and I shouldn't have"

"No, I know ... it's fine "she smiles. "I'd have probably done the same thing. Though... to be fair, I probably don't hit quite as hard as you" she laughs through her tears

"You got some ice?"

"Ice box" she nods, and he heads to the refrigerator.

He takes some out, wrapping it in a dishcloth he places it against her cheek. She flinches for a moment at the cold and the pain. "Hold it there...it'll take the swelling down"

"Jason..." she looks at him

He shakes his head and looks away "No, you're not getting around me. So, don't...don't say anything" he closes his eyes not looking at her, he can't let his guard down around her "This still doesn't explain what you've done"

She takes the ice off and drinks the last of the drink and gets up and pours some more. "You want one?"

He shakes his head " Do you really need another?"

She smiles to herself and lets out a long sigh "When... when I eventually got myself together. I'd been in there ten weeks" she takes a deep breath "Daniel told me what he'd done. The story he'd weaved. That they told you I..." she starts to cry. "that I died"

It's an all-out sob, a cry from deep inside her. _Shit!_ She steadies herself, wiping her face. "You have to believe me .. I wanted to undo it so bad. Please believe that. I wanted to come straight there and tell you that it wasn't true. But there were things...other things, it was...was complicated. I did try a while back, I saw you, but you seemed in a better place and I couldn't do it. I didn't want to upset your lives"

She takes a breath her eyes pleading with him to forgive here "They ... well they threatened if I told you, if I undid it all. And went back to you, if I didn't work for them, then they'd hurt you, both of you. Jason you know from the past, these people don't mess around. It was just better that I went along with it. It was my way of keeping you safe" She takes another deep breath and continues "Daniel found Matt. He said I needed _to get my head right_ " she laughs "So .. here we are! This is me..." she raises the glass " with my head right!"

"So, what you've been sleeping with your shrink?"

She closes her eyes. Him putting it so bluntly makes it sound bad and she doesn't want Jason to think any worse of her. She laughs "Um... well, it wasn't like I was actually going to get my head right was I ... I mean, I've been there before with all that. It doesn't work. Me and therapy. I can't do it. It's, well you know. You understand that, don't you"

She takes another mouthful of drink as she and Jason just continue staring at each other "You know Matt, he's okay really. Yeah, bit naïve but hey, guess he didn't know what he got involved in, with... me. How complicated it all was. It's not his fault" she bites her lip as she thinks "I think you've probably scared him half to death." she laughs "Why the hell did you do that to him?"

"I dunno. I um... I saw your picture, on his phone when you called him. He kept lying, denying he knew you" He sighs "I got so mad but I think he was more scared of what you might do, if you found out he told me, so he tried to keep quiet, lie his way out. In the end I just totally lost it. I shouldn't have. You're right I could have killed him."

Tears of relief run down her face; she wipes them away. She presses the cloth wrapped ice to her cheek again "So, what now? Are you gonna tell anyone, about me?"

"No! No, you're still dead to me and that's the way it's staying"

"Jason!?"

"No don't! You stay away from us. I mean it. I want no contact, with me or Jaycee. Nothing, no people following us, nothing. Do you understand me CJ?"

"Jason I can't just not..."

" _NOTHING!_ You stay the hell away. You stay dead" he glares at her

She closes her eyes. Tears run down her face and reluctantly nods "Okay if that's what you want?" she's desperately hoping that it isn't "but..."

"NO buts ... we're done. I grieved for you, and we moved on. That's it now. I can't do this with you again."

"But you didn't, move on. You came looking for me!"

"No, I didn't come looking for you. I came looking for answers for your son. Looking, for some family, a connection. Hell, even a grave! Just something for him that in years to come he could remember his mother by. But, no way did I expect this. Jesus!" he shakes his head "We're done now!"

She swallows hard as the reality of what he's saying, "So, that's it.? That's the end. You never want to see me again."

"Yeah pretty much" he nods "We both get on with our lives now" and he turns to go

"JASON, please! Don't go!" she pleads "Stay. Just tonight. Stay with me ...then tomorrow I promise, I'll be gone, out of your life for good"

"No... no I'm not doing this!"

She gets up placing the glass and the ice pack down "Jason please! Please just me and you, one night. Just stay with me. You know you want to. I can see you want me."

He's trying to resist as stands looking at her. Looking at her there in her shirt unbuttoned and only her panties on. She looks small, a vulnerable, broken mess and suddenly he wants to protect her. She's right, he wants to hold her and have her hold him. "I can't. I can't do this. Every time I let you in it's me that gets hurt"

"Please ... don't say goodbye. Not like this" she steps forward and puts her hand on his cheek, stroking it. As she leans up to kiss him she pulls back, suddenly, the pain in her lip. she grimaces. He runs his thumb gently along the cut and she closes her eyes to his touch on her skin.

Then he leans in and does what he promised himself he wouldn't, he kisses her. She wraps her hands round his head and holds on to him and despite the pain in her face she kisses him like she's never kissed him before. Wanting him. Needing him.

He walks her backwards towards the bedroom. She's grappling at his pants, trying to undo his belt as he pulls his tee shirt over his head. He doesn't even think what he's doing.

Now dropping his pants, he's unable to resist. The desire and need for her overcomes his senses. He gives in to his want for her. Her obvious passion for him the same as it's always been. She's watching his facial expression as he thrusts himself inside her. She gasps wanting and needy as their bodies press tightly against each other.

 _Oh God!_ She sighs, as the hard want of his firm muscular body grinds deeply inside her. Him forcing himself against her, grabbing at her naked flesh, wrapping his arms around her back, his hands massaging her butt.

He wants her so much as his kisses find her neck, her scent of desire filling his nostrils, her perfume turning him on as it brings back memories of past encounters.

Pulling against his head she presses his mouth firmly against her breast and she pants, wantonly as he sucks, teasing her pert nipple, making her peak quickly. She can feel her skin prickle with a flush of heat the stimulation becomes too much and her body floods with a wave of orgasm.

 _Oh fuck!_ she gasps desperately "Jason!" she cries out and he watches her close her eyes and her body tense he smiles as he continues with more firm, grinding thrusts against her.

Then as they lie in the bed, he pulls her on top of him. Her shirt unbuttoned and open he slides it down her arms, as he takes it off her body. She's totally naked underneath and her large firm breasts are there heaving in front of him. He can't help but touch and leaning his head forward his lips kiss in circles over them.

"Jason, don't leave me. Please" she gasps.

He's not listening to what she's saying. He just lays back watching as she straddles her legs across his body and forces herself onto his firmness. He pulls her hips down against him tighter, as she fucks grinding her body against his until he's unable to hold and now he peaks shooting his warm white cum inside her.

She smiles, satisfied as they collapse on the bed beside each other. Then lying next to him her back against his chest as he wraps his arms around her. She continues to smile thinking how safe she feels in his arms. How she always did feel protected by him. How much comfort she gets...they just lay in silence for a long time

"I am sorry." she sighs "You know I... I never wanted any of this and if I could undo it I would"

"But that's the problem you can't"

"No... no I can't! But you don't know how sorry I am about that"

They lay quiet again. She runs her fingers on his arm "So um... you and Mandy ...is there something going on between you?"

"Maybe, maybe not! Oh god, I don't know. But it's none of your business"

She swallows hard that coldness from him and the idea that he's having thoughts about him and Mandy having a future. It hurts. "You like her though? I mean really like her."

"She's been a good friend. She's been there for me"

This cuts deep in her emotions. Holding back the way she really feels. That she hates it. Hates the thought of it "Well, that's good.. that someone's there for you. You deserve that"  
Of course she doesn't really mean it, the only person she want to be with Jason .. is her. She bites her lip holding back her jealous tears

"You and him gonna make something of it?"

"Me and Matt? No, no I don't think so" she laughs "He's really not my type. Too touchy feely. He wants to talk about everything" she laughs "You know me, I like action more than words"

 _"Mmmm!"_ She closes her eyes as he kisses her neck, and they both relax again. Turning around she kisses him on the mouth. Looking him in the face. Studying it. She stares him in the eyes "Jason... I still want you... so much"

"Don't! C.J don't say that. You know that's not enough anymore!"

"I know" She nods. It hurts "I get it. Really, I do. Doesn't mean I like it" She kisses him again and wraps her leg around his body so that once again they're a part of each other.

 _Oh! Jeeez oh!... oh My... god! Jason!_ she breathlessly lets out a deep long sigh as he, gently but forcefully this time, pushes himself inside her. Running his hands over her curves gently thrusting this time. None of the need from before. This time its gentle and not rushed. Both needily kissing each other and not stopping.

 _"Oh C.J ... god! I want you so much! Shit!"_ his breathing's rapid, hands massaging around the curves of her butt holding her tight to him.

She closes her eyes enjoying every part of this moment. A tear rolls down her cheek as she accepts this is going to be the last time that this ever happens. The last time he makes love to her. But despite knowing this she still feels content.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She wakes up and rubs her face _Awww shit!_ She sighs. Her face is so sore that she can hardly touch it.

The bed is empty, except for her and she puts her hand out, feeling the space next to her. The one where Jason was.

She closes her eyes. The space is cold, and tears prickle against her swollen cheek as realizes he's gone. She holds her face again trying to ease the pain by gently rubbing it _Shit!_

This is it. She knows it. She can feel the change. C.J and Jason are done forever. Any hope of a life for them is over. The grief, and pain of her mourning him as tears stream down her face, she turns over and sobs into the pillow.

The ringing of her phone brings back the stark reality of real life and she gathers herself, wiping away the last of her tears. She takes a deep breath as she answers it

"Catherine Lewis"

"Yeah it's me. Agent Ellis is at the meet point with Rita. What you want us to do?" She thinks for a moment as she lets out a deep breath and with it she lets go of all of last night's emotions, all her feelings for Jason.

 _Such a shame Agent Ellis really doesn't know when to let things go ... she could get herself in all sorts of dangerous situations_

She has a choice to make. She could right now call off the original order that she made. She takes another deep breath while she thinks about it

"Let Mendoza know where they are." She swallows hard "And tell him... tell him he owes me a big favor" She hangs up the call and closes her eyes knowing what she's just done. It's one final thing as she sees it that needed fixing before she allows CJ to rest.

Her old life is now over.

She sits up and pours another drink and taking deep breath she knocks it back and then she looks at the time on her watch.

She picks her cell phone and makes a call "Daniel, yeah it's Catherine. Yes, I'm fine! It's all sorted. Get that Bashar contract ready. I'll be back in the office soon to sign it"

Sonny Quinn you'll pay for this 

"BRAVO 2 this is BRAVO 1 do you have eyes on the target yet?"

"This is BRAVO 2, no! I don't see them yet. Do you have last location?"

"They were seen in that motel." Jason pauses checking his map "BRAVO 3, come around. Bravo 6 go with him. Keep your eyes open. Stay awake. We got tangos everywhere. Let's hope we find them before they do. Once they know we're coming they're gonna try and take them" he sighs "Havoc this is Bravo 1, any luck reaching Mandy on comms yet? COPY"

"BRAVO 1 this is Havoc. Nothing so far. Will let you know ASAP when sitrep comes in"

"Copy that" Jason rubs his head. _Shit!_ "Mandy, where are you?"

"Jace! … Jason. Heads up!"

"What is it Trent?"

"There! There, that flash. You see it? At the window. There it is again."

Jason watches carefully, he's still unable to see anything at first, then a few minutes of watching, he too sees the small, bright white light, at the window, flashing. "It's a flashlight!" he smiles "Good girl Mandy! Havoc this is Bravo one, we have eyes on our target. We're moving in"

"Copy that BRAVO 1. Just be careful, these cartels are well armed. We don't have resources in area for immediate extraction COPY"

"COPY that Havoc, proceeding. Okay, let's go get 'em"

Bravo surround the building and Jason and Ray are first through the outer door. It's all quiet inside. Sonny and Clay come through the other side door, Brock and Trent follow up behind.

"CLEAR!"

"CLEAR!"

"Brock, time for the dog to earn his keep!"

"Okay boy! Go find 'em!"

Cerberus is going all over the house searching. He leaves the ground floor and heads up the stairs. The team hear him barking and proceed with care up from where they are up.

The dog is stood at the cupboard on the landing and slowly Jason opens the door as Trent covers him. The tip of his rifle pointing inside first. And there, on the floor crouched beside each other is Mandy and Rita. "Oh, thank god!" Mandy lets out a huge sigh and Rita closes her eyes to pray "You came for us! You don't know how relieved I am. I thought it was them"

She's nearly in tears. They've been so frightened that Mandy only moved to signal with the flashlight on her phone a few times. They're both so tired. It's been an extremely frightening couple of days for them trying to move from the safe house. The location was compromised when a bomb attack was made on it. Luckily for them, it was just after Mandy received word that it was going to happen, and they managed to getaway.

"C'mon, we need to get you out of here. This is not over yet. Bring her!" Jason points to Rita. Sonny cuffs her as they proceed back down the stairs

There's a sudden sound of gun fire opening up on another house in the street. "Shit! They know we're here. Someone must have tipped them off"

Bullets start to whizz into the building.

"Everyone okay?" Jason looks round checking on his team "HAVOC this is Bravo 1 any news with that exfil yet?. We're taking some serious heat!"

"We got a local force on route. They're five mics out"

"Copy that HAVOC will update sitrep ASAP" Jason looks at Ray "Okay exfil is five mics out. We need to hold them off till they get here. Put them under the stairs for safety. Till we're ready to leave."

He frowns at Mandy as he sees a cut on her head "You okay? Are you hurt?"

"Yeah it's okay! It was from earlier. Me and her had words when she tried to get away!" she frowns at Rita "I'm just glad you found us. I didn't think we were getting out of here"

"Yeah lucky for you that Blackburn got tipped off your location. Someone sent intel that your safe house had been compromised!"

"Yeah I received anonymous information. Said we needed to move, that the safe house was compromised. That's how come we moved. I have no idea who. They just said our lives were in danger. Guess someone didn't want Rita talking"

"Blackburn had no trace on the source. Still just glad we got here in time"

"Me too! I shouldn't have just gone with the intel, before I checked it out more thoroughly, not after everything that's gone on. But was too good to …."

She stops as more bullets fly past their heads

"Okay...GET DOWN! BRAVO three, you see anything?"

"No can't get a clear line yet!"

"Ray take Spenser upstairs, see if you can get us some over-watch from there"

Rapid fire can now be heard all around the building as more bullets whizz through the windows shattering the glass everywhere _Shit!_ Sonny looks at his arm as a piece of glass wedges in his jacket. It doesn't go in deep just enough to break the skin though

"Sonny you okay?"

"Yeah I'll live. We need to get out of here. Let's hope that exfil gets here soon!"

"Mandy, take Rita….. get some cover in the back room"

Sonny lets off some rounds through the window, taking out two targets at the front of the building. Ray picks off a couple more of the shooters in a side street. Spenser gets one who was setting up on the roof opposite. Then over the sounds of the gun fire, they hear vehicles approaching, fast.

"Bravo 1 this is Bravo 2 looks exfil just arrived. Heavily armored vehicles outside. They're gonna need them we're taking some serious heat. Copy" "You sure they're friendlies?"

"We're just checking sitrep...HAVOC this is BRAVO1 can you update on the exfil?"

"BRAVO 1 exfil is on site"

"Okay let's get ready to move"

The vehicles pull up outside the front to the building. Those agents inside engage in a heavy and continual exchange of gun fire across the street. Then everything goes quiet, except of the one or two solitary gunshots until they too go silent. Now voices can be heard.

"Policia! Policia!"

"Sonny open the doors. Trent cover him" Jason orders.

As he does they see the heavy armoured vehicles waiting a few feet outside on the pavement "Mandy up! And you" he looks at Rita "Go! Go, go!"  
he pushes the women out the door to the arms of the waiting Police chief standing with the side door the armoured vehicles open

Then a single gunshot rings out. Followed closely a few moments later by one from upstairs as Clay takes out a target across the street. Rita drops to the ground in front of Mandy who lets out a scream

.Jason stops. For a moment he's concerned that Mandy is hit but she's okay she's trying desperately to lift Rita from the ground. "Mandy GO!...GO! GO!" he shouts at her" We'll take care of her. Just get to safety"

"MANDY!... Leave her! Just Go!"

She looks him in the face again and realising how much danger there is she gets in the vehicle "Damn!" she's angry with herself and despite all the danger she's still mad that she's lost Rita, and the intel she could've provided.

Jason and Sonny pick up Rita's body, putting it inside one of the waiting vehicles. Then they and the rest of Bravo load into the vehicles. Just as theres a sound of more vehicles arriving is heard. Jason realises it's the cartel, gathering more troops

"GO! DRIVE! Now!" he orders "We're targets here we need to move" he bangs on the van front to the driver "GO! Go go!" The armoured convoy start to leave followed by the sound of heavier gun fire _Pheww!_ Jason sighs as he leans his back on the side wall of the van, as they speed off.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

 **Police - intelligence headquarters**

BRAVO lean back in their seats, resting up after the mission and Sonny hands around some of the beers from the cooler. Mandy's in the medical room getting the cut on her head checked. When Jason pops his head around the door-frame

"Hey! "How you doin? You okay?"

"Yeah, yeah. I'm good. It's just a cut. I fell, when I fought with Rita. She tried to get away when we moved from the safe house. You know I can't believe they got her" she shakes her head " _Damn!_ This whole thing, it's just been a dangerous waste of time"

"Hey, that's not your fault"

"Thanks" she looks up and smiles at the medic as they finish tending her wound. "Jason I should never have just come out here, like this, without backup. It was stupid. I acted on emotion, I just wanted to get her so bad. That was my mistake. I let emotions override my actions"

"I know … thank god Blackburn got that intel in time"

"Yeah. Yeah, I need to look into that, when I get back. See if I can trace where it came from, and who leaked the original intel. They may have a connection."

"Don't worry about that now, you just rest up. You've had a long couple of days. You know, I don't know what I would have done if we hadn't got there in time?"

"Hey you did okay! So, don't dwell on the what might have beens!" she puts her hand to his lips silencing him "Jason you got here. That's all that matters"

"Yeah we did!" He smiles at her, stroking her cheek then without any warning he leans in and kisses her.

"Um..." she coughs "... not sure this is a good idea, either."

He smiles "No but then when did I ever do anything that was a good idea, where women are concerned"

"I get your point!" She smiles as she kisses him back

"Mandy I need to tell you something about um...well about Washington"

"Shhh! Not now. Jason it...it doesn't matter." she leans her head on his chest and he puts his arms around her, holding her tight to his chest "No more chat. You're right, I need some rest. I'm so tired"

"Yeah you're right. I guess it doesn't matter, not anymore."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Oh my God!" _Fuck!_ " she sucks in a deep breath. _Urggghh! "_ I don't believe it!" CJ throws her phone down and in her rage she sweeps all the files and paperwork off the desk to the floor. She's just about to throw the glass, that sits beside her laptop, but screwing her face up in anger she decides against it.

 _FUCK!_ She refills the empty glass, from the bottle stood on the desk. Biting her lip hard as she tries to calm her anger. "Who the fuck did this!?" She runs her hands through her hair and continues to rant _Aarrrghhh! FUCK!_

Then closing her eyes, she takes deep, deliberate breaths of air before she gulps back the drink in one shot. It fills her mouth, and she struggles to swallow the fiery liquid, leaning her head on the back of the chair, while savoring the taste

Daniel knocks, then enters the office. Seeing all of the files on the floor, and the empty desk "Oh my god! Shit!" he stops where he is at the door "What the hell's happened here? Catherine are you alright?" He frowns, worried by the look on her face as she gaze up to look at him "What's going on?"

She sneers at him, the taste from the drink subsiding from her taste buds "Mandy _fuckin_ ' Ellis… is what's going on!"

"I don't understand?" he swallows hard. He's frown deepening on his face "Why? What's _she_ done?"

"She's not dead! That's what she's done." she drinks some more of the whiskey she pours in the glass "It seems _someone_ ...someone sent a T1 team to rescue her and that informant woman, Rita. Now they're both firmly stashed away somewhere, with the CIA, and I can't find out where! Someone's covering this!" she continues to frown at him "oh and... " she laughs "to rub salt in the wound, they sent BRAVO team. Can you _fuckin_ ' believe it?"

She continues to laugh at the irony of the situation "They send Jason, to rescue her!" _Fuck!_ She shakes her head and points at Daniel. He frowns as she continues her rant "Someone knew, they knew what I had planned. They did this to go against me."

Daniel looks and feels uncomfortable, as she stares at him "I tell you this, when I find out _who_ then I swear to god Daniel, I'll make them pay. I wanted that bitch dead! "

She swallows hard, pouring even more whiskey into her glass "No one crosses me like this. I want you to find out...find out who. I want to know .. do you understand me?"

"Alright, just calm down. I'm not sure what's happened. I'll look into it, but you need to calm down." he takes a breath "How many drinks have you had?"

She takes a large glug from the glass "Only a few! I'm fine don't worry about that. Anyway, after all that, what did you want?" She looks up from her drink "You want one?"

"Um...no! No, I'm fine" he shuffles nervously in the doorway

"Oh, for god sake Daniel whatever it is just spit it out. I'm not in the mood."

"Okay, I um…I wondered if you were thinking about going to the grave? For the anniversary."

She wipes her face and takes a deep breath. She stands staring at him as she thinks. Drinking from the glass as she calms downs. "Yeah, yeah I was thinking about it. I wasn't sure if it was a good idea or not."

She drops her head and takes a moment to reflect as she looks at the desk, the files on the floor "You know, I think about that night so many times. If we could have saved him. If I'd have done things differently that night. Jeez!" she rubs her head, taking another slurp of her drink "Oh god Daniel, so much has happened, and you know the worst? My baby, my son, I won't get to see him again. I had so little time with him"

She leans her head back in the chair, where she now sits. Closes her eyes as a couple of large tears roll down her cheek. She wipes them away and takes a deep breath as all of her frustrations, all her emotion, everything pours out now. She swallows it all back "It hurts I won't get to see him, Daniel"

"Catherine, I'm.." he closes his eyes. He wonders how she manages to go from dead cold killer, to heartbroken falling apart mess the next. It really is like she's two people. But her saying she misses her son is new, he's never heard her say that before. "I'm sorry! It's for the best though. He's in the safest place. It's early days, it'll get easier"

She sucks in her tears and nods her head "I know you didn't mean for it to end up like this, that we thought this was the right things. It's just at times, it hurts that I can't be with him. Hell, I'm never going to be able to speak to him" _Oh God! S_ he puts her hand to her mouth as tears continue to roll down her cheeks "I just wanna see him and hold him. He's gonna grow up and never know me"

"You know, I don't know what's brought this on" He's worried about her " But you can't see him. Look, maybe I can get someone to check on them for you? Get some updates now and again"

"Yeah sure" She nods "That would be good." she drinks the rest of her drink and then pours some more.

Daniel's watching her as she sits in the chair " This will pass. Just everything getting on top of you" he pauses "Look, I'm gonna book a flight and hotel, stay overnight, for the visit to the grave. I was gonna stay at the Redgate" He smiles "You want me to sort something for you as well?"

She drinks the drink back in one and goes to pour yet another "Yeah why not. I need to get out of here for a while, this whole thing is driving me crazy!"

"Do you um….think that is such a good idea?" he nods towards the bottle on the desk. Worried about the amount she's drinking.

"Just concentrate on finding out who leaked my plan for Ellis. Sort that and then we'll talk about my drinking!"

"Okay, alright! Calm down. Look, I'm just worried about you, that's all." He nods "I'll go and make the hotel arrangements"

As he gets to the door Matt's waiting to enter "Daniel!...How is she?" he keeps his voice low so she can't hear him

"Not good!" he checks back in the office "Look, someone fucked her plans, and … well, to say she's not happy..." He frowns "Maybe you can have a word? I did um. manage to talk her into going to the grave. I thought about what you said, and you're right, it might be good for her to start to put some of this behind her. It's been a tough few months."

He checks on her again, she's still sitting in her chair, drinking. He shakes his head "Look um... I'll leave you with her. But, I warn you she's very volatile at moment and um.. she's been drinking, a lot!"

"Okay!" Matt frowns and takes a deep breath "I'll try and have a word. See if I can get her to calm down"

"Yeah, well good luck with that!" Daniel pats Matt on the arm and leaves

"Catherine!"

"Oh jeez! She sighs, closing her eyes "Have you come to give me a lecture as well?"

"No!" He smiles "I just came to see you want dinner" She opens her eyes looking at him as she finishes what's left in her glass. Matt surveys the mess in the room, looking at the mess on the floor "You had a busy day?"

"Yeah you could say that!" She laughs "Dinner? Yeah sure, I guess I can do dinner" She picks her jacket up off the chair and gets ready to leave

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They sit at the table with the menus in hand.

"So, Daniel says you had a setback today? Someone compromised one of your operations. You wanna talk about it?" he's trying to tread carefully with his words

"How about Daniel should keep his big mouth shut!" she smiles "And maybe you should stop with the shrink talk."

"Do you wanna talk about it or not?"

"No!" She takes a sip from the glass of wine "Sorry. Oh, it's nothing. It doesn't matter now."

"But it was something? Something to do with Mandy Ellis?"

She frowns looking up from her glass "Why do you say that?" she stares at him watching him, reading his expressions "Was it you? Was it you that tipped them off?"

"No!" he frowns "Catherine why would I? I don't know anything about it, I just heard her name mentioned. Look, you know there's no love lost between me and him, not after what he did to me. But why? What were you going to do?"

"Like I said it doesn't matter now. Let's just change the subject"

"Catherine it does matter. What were you going to do to Agent Ellis?" he frowns at her. Watching this evil glint flash across her eyes at the mention of Mandy's name "Oh my god!" he hushes his voice "Catherine! Were you gonna do something to her?"

She bites her lip

"Oh my god you were!... you were gonna have her killed?"

She looks away avoiding his gaze "Waiter can I have a large JD with ice please, and whatever he wants"

"I'm fine with water, thanks"

"Jeez! You're Mr Exciting .. " she sighs and rolls her eyes

"Catherine, something like that it's going too far. My god this is obsession you have. You'd really go as far as to have her killed? What because …" he frowns "..because you think _he_ might get with her? Jesus, Catherine this has got to stop."

"Thanks" she smiles at the waiter "Could you bring another. I think I'm gonna need it" "Oh so what! She shouldn't have gone snooping. I didn't want Jason finding out I was alive. It's just complicated everything "

Matt sits back in his chair looking at her. "No, no she didn't. You did when you slept with him again. That's what complicated everything. That's what open those old wounds up. He doesn't want to be with you Catherine and you need to accept that. Move on"

" _HE_ doesn't want me. Yeah, yeah you might be right" she shrugs "I'm not so sure. But what about Jaycee is he still gonna lie to him and tell him I'm dead when there's now need now. You know I could at least still see him. Jason could put this right" she smiles "But he won't" _Awww!_ "Just forget it!"

She's so frustrated and the drink is starting to cloud her thoughts. But still she continues to drink "Oh fuck it!" She rubs her head in frustration and pushing her chair back, she stands up "You what? dinner, it was a bad idea. I'm gonna go"

"Catherine don't! Stay! At least have something to eat. If for no other reason than to soak up some of that alcohol" He puts his hand on hers "Then maybe after… well perhaps we could have some time together. You know it's been a while. Maybe it's what we both need a bit of time together"

She puts her head on one side and bites her lip. She doesn't understand why Matt still hopes there's something between them. She frowns and smiles watching him, thinking about what he's offering. Sex. "Maybe you're right. It has been a while on that front" She smiles

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

 ** A week later **

The car pulls into the cemetery. Daniel's looking out of the tinted window, looking at the rows of neatly tended graves.

Catherine's sitting beside him in the back seat, she has her sunglasses on, shading hangover from the bright sunlight. She leans her head back closing them under her shades, while unbeknown to Daniel, she's playing out the scene from the hotel on the night their father was shot.

The sound of the gun shot as it rang out across the gala room. The sounds of screaming from the women hostages while she clung to Jason trying to hold her in own cries. Trying to be quiet when all she wanted to do was scream out loud. She wishes she could get back, changed it. Saved him. Told him, despite everything, how much she loved him.

 _Huh!_ She jumps suddenly at the sound of Daniel's voice telling the driver to stop. He wakes her back to reality.

He frowns as she suddenly moves in the seat "You okay?"

"Yeah, yeah sure. Don't worry I'm just tired"

"Yeah tired, right!" _Hmmm! "_ Yeah, you do look tired!"

"And what's that supposed to mean?"

"Oh I don't know, maybe it looks like the kind of tiredness that you get out of a bottle?"

"Oh, for god sake! Don't start on that again" she shakes her head "Daniel I can't be dealing with lectures, not today!"

"You're right no lectures. Anyway, we're here now. It's just over there" he presses the button and lets down the window up as she goes to get out of her door he stops her "WAIT!" He gets hold of her hand stopping her from opening the door "Just stay there a minute" He frowns as he watches out of the window, looking at the two figures who are standing beside their father's grave

"What is it?" she frowns

"Just stay in the car!"

"Daniel what is it?" Curious, she drops her shades and looks out the front windshield "Oh my god! Is that... is that Jason?" she takes a deep breath "What the hell is he doing here?"

"I don't know. But it looks like he's laying flowers."

He is indeed laying flowers and stood beside him is a small child. "Jaycee!" she watches from the anonymity of the back of the car "Why is he doing that?

"I guess they're paying their respects too. He must have remembered it was the anniversary. I supposed he didn't think about you coming."

"But they didn't get on, Jason and ... they didn't get on" She laughs "Why the hell would he come here? And why would he bring Jaycee?"

Daniel frowns "Maybe because he's being a good dad?" he laughs "because he's um... he is" he corrects himself " was.. Jaycee's grandfather. Maybe showing him respect, giving Jaycee something, some family, some roots, some history. I don't know" he sighs "I don't know how Jason thinks, you know better than me." He looks over at her sitting there silently watching "You wanna leave?"

She bites at her lip and nods. She lets out a long sigh, sucking back the tears in her throat. She's feeling overly emotional as it is, seeing the pair of them hurts even more.

He watches her for a moment. He can see that she's struggling with her emotions "Drive on!" Daniel taps on the driver's shoulder "Get us out of here."

"No! No wait! Just stop! Let's just wait here for a moment. Please." she looks at Daniel "Please, just for a minute. For me"

"Catherine I'm not sure this is a good idea."

"Please Daniel, just a few minutes"

"Alright, okay! If you're sure, just for a few minutes then." he reluctantly agrees he looks at the driver and nods,

She smiles as she watches Jason and Jaycee as they get up after leaving the flowers and she watches as Jason shows Jaycee how to salute. Then brushing her tears "Oh god! He's so big now. So, grown up since I last saw him" her lip quivers and she puts her hand on the door handle, as she considers getting out.

"NO!" Daniel leans across her and stops her opening the door "Don't! You don't get out. Catherine you can't do that to the child. He won't understand!".

The tears well in her eyes and she puts her hand to her mouth to stifle her cry. " Oh God! I know ... I know you 're right" she sucks back her tears "Oh shit! What the hell's wrong with me. I'm like some emotional mess! Oh god, just DRVIE! Get out of here!... NOW!" she screams at the driver.

He looks back at Daniel who nods for them to leave. and then he rolls the black tinted windows up again. As they pass Jason leaving the graveside, he stares directly into the window. She takes a deep breath in, though she knows he can't see her she still closes her eyes and bites her lip holding her breath nervously.

"Let's go back to the hotel. We can come back tomorrow" Daniel reassures her,

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sonny's leaning against his truck in Jason's driveway. Ray and Mikey are playing basketball on the front lawn, just as Jason pulls back in the yard

"Hey, how'd it go?" Ray asks him as he gets Jaycee out of the truck.

"Yeah it was okay. I've done my bit. I just think he'll need things like that it in the future. Some family connections something to hold on to. You know it just felt strange from my point of view. Can't stop thinking about that night, what happened there, what went on. Jeez Ray, so much has happened since" he shakes his head and lets out a long sigh "Still at least I've got him. He's the one good thing to come out of all this mess. I don't know what I'd do without him Ray!" He smiles as he picks Jaycee up. Kisses his cheek before putting him down again "Go play with Mikey and Uncle Sonny!"

"Hey, c'mon" Ray smiles, patting Jason on the shoulder "Lets grab a beer"

"I'll go get another crate and bring them out" Clay says as he watches the guys. They're all kicking the ball with the kids. He smiles thinking how nice this is, how much he loves being part of this team.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"I'm going for a lie down. We'll do the whole respect thing tomorrow, yeah?"

"Yeah sure!" Daniel frowns at her "It's really got to you didn't it. Seeing them?"

"I'm okay. Just um...I need some time on my own. You good?"

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine " he looks at his phone "Look um... I've got a friend to catch up with. I'll check in with you later, yeah?"

"Oh... a _friend?_ " she smiles "Would that be a female friend?"

"Maybe!" he smiles "Just don't wait up, okay?" he kisses the top of her head "You look tired, get some rest!" He turns to leave giving her a concerned frown "And um...Catherine. Don't drink too much, please."

"Yeah, I'll try not to!" she smile back "I'm just gonna have a bath and lie down. But hey... have fun!"

She heads towards the lift, watching him exit the hotel main entrance. Then as he disappears from sight, she turns back and heads to the bar. "Large JD and ice" she orders as she seats herself on the bar stool. She flicks the photos on her phone while thinking about today. Thinking about how she felt seeing her son.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Hey!" Daniel smiles

"Hey!" Mandy kisses him on the cheek as she sits herself opposite him at the table

He notices the cut on her head "You okay?"

"Oh this..." she puts her hand to it "it's nothing. Just a work thing" she smiles

"Everything been okay? With work I mean."

"Yeah, yeah I um…." She hesitates " I'm fine! The target package you gave me, I lost the informant." She takes a sip of the wine in her glass "It got compromised and um... she got killed"

"Wow! But you're okay, I mean, apart from your head? So, you know what went wrong?"

"Someone gave up the safe house location, that you gave me in the package. Someone also gave us warning and we managed to move just in time. Someone set people to get us."

"Well I'm glad it all went alright in the end. I mean for you" he puts his hand on hers "I'd have hated for my intel to have meant you got hurt" he smiles "I knew it was a risk and I should have checked it out further"

"Hey…" she smiles at him "it wasn't your fault. She was there, where you said. Just someone compromised that intel. I'm gonna try and find out who. I think there might be a leak"

"Is that a good idea? I mean, now you're safe. Do you really need to know?"

"We'll see … " She smiles at him, sipping her wine "I was um... surprised to hear from you again. I mean, I hadn't heard much from you since you left. What are you doing here, or can't you say?"

"Oh um...I had a family thing to attend and I just thought while I was here... that perhaps we could pick up, you know... where we left off?" he smiles

"We'll see ... now I can't quite remember where we left off." she bites her lip and drinks some more wine as she smiles teasingly at him

"Shall we order, and then talk about it?"

"That sounds good to me"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She sits at the bar still drinking, still thinking about her son. She lays her phone on the bar

"Can I get you another?" She looks up at rugged voiced stranger standing beside her "Is this seat taken? I mean you're not waiting for anyone?"

"No!" she smiles "It looks pretty empty to me!" She bites her lip, looking at the dark-haired guy. He's wearing a very nice, very expensive looking suit and he sits himself down on the high stool beside her.

"It's just um... I was thinking, someone like you, she doesn't look like she should be drinking alone in the afternoon"

She smiles "Then you don't know me very well, do you!"

"Well…. perhaps we can change that?"

"Yeah maybe … mines a large whiskey"

"Two large whiskeys then please!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

An hour or so has passed. They've chatted between the lots of drinking they've been doing. And now he places his hand on her thigh. "You know we could take this upstairs?"

She bites her lip "Yeah we could... or we could stay down here and drink some more."

"We could take the drink upstairs as well?" He kisses her neck and she closes her eyes as she tries to gather her thoughts. As she does the image of Jason and JC flash in her head and she pushes him back away from her.

"You know what? I think I'm okay here!"

"Oh, c'mon, you know you want to. A woman drinking alone, early afternoon...that's a come-on if ever I saw one."

"Really! Well see I don't see it like that and um...you're the one who came on to me"

"No, I think you're up for it?" He laughs putting his between her legs "Think it's time we pay for those drinks, don't you?"

She laughs "Wow! You're smooth… is this what you do, hang around in hotel bars looking for sad lonely women?"

"Well if that's what you are then I could make you less lonely for an hour .. or two"

"I don't think you've got that long in you…. so, I'll pass" she knocks back the rest of her drink

He takes exception to her put down and forces is hand between her legs again, digging his fingers in "You know what fuck you bitch. You're a tease and it's time to pay up!" His other hand move up and fondles her breast

She moves his hand and bends his fingers back trying to restrain her temper "If you say so. But be careful because you never know who you're talking to"

He smirks at her as he pulls his hand away "Go fuck yourself bitch!" He picks up his jacket "You need to get a job. Sitting here whoring yourself out for drinks"

She closes her eyes and lets out a deep breath "God you're unbelievable! Just go!

"We could have had a good time but... your loss!" he gets up and leaves

 _FUCK!_ She rubs her hair back with both hands and then finishes her drink. "I need to get out of here!" she picks up her jacket and also leaves

o-o-o-o- o-o-o-o-o-

Naima and Jameelah bring the burgers outside and start to hand them around "You lot still out here, playing?"

The men are all now playing basketball. Mikey and Jaycee are sitting on the driveway having been excluded from the rough, fighting game that's going on. She hands them some food

"They took the ball!" Mikey looks at Naima

"Grown ass men should know better" she shakes her head "Here, eat some food!" She hands a burger to Ray "Mop up some of that beer!"

Ray kisses her head "Yes Ma'am!"

She sits on the grass with Jaycee and her own kids and helps them with their burgers. Jason turns around as the ball hits him on the head.

"Hey boss!" Sonny shouts " Are you still playing, or do you concede to be a loser?"

"I don't concede but... just give me a minute, Sonny" He frowns staring across the street "I'll be right back. Keep the kids there!"

"Where's he going?" Sonny frowns

Ray shrugs "I don't know, let's get some food" as he looks back as Jason disappears across the road

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

 _Arrrghh!... SHIT!_ She hits the floor with a thud. Coughing and choking as the hand grabs her throat "Let me go!" She coughs "You're …. choking me!" she grimaces as the hand tightens

"What did I tell you?"

"Yeah I know! Look… look, I'm sorry. Jason, just let me go!"

"CJ… what the Fuck are you doing here? I told you to stay away from us. Hell, you said you'd stay away. You said you'd stay _DEAD!_ "

"I know... I know what I said, but please just get off me."

She tries to push him back but he's lying on top of her holding her down on the ground. He sniffs her. "You've been drinking?! Oh my god! CJ, you need to leave right now and don't come back! " His face is red and full of anger " We had an agreement you wouldn't come near us"

"Jason" She coughs again "Jason! You're choking me!"

"I should kill you! That's what I should do" She starts to cry as he holds her tight "Oh no, not this again? You're pathetic! What the hell are you even doing here?"

"Going to the grave. It's the ... the anniversary, of my father."

"It was you!" he frowns "In the car. I knew there was something about it! Jeez!"

She nods as he eases up pressure on her neck "I want to see Jaycee. I can't lose my kids" she swallows; she can get her breath "I miss him Jason. I can't do this, not being able to see him as well. It's too hard"

"Well you'll have to. That was the agreement!"

"Please can we just come to another arrangement? Just maybe once in a while. Give me something. I've given up so much to keep them safe" she frowns at him pleading "You know, I don't expect to see him all the time, but please! Just don't make this get messy"

"What the fuck do you mean get messy?"

She can't help herself "Don't make me come after him!"

"What the fuck?" he starts to choke her again. While she desperately pulls at his hand trying to free herself

"JASON!...What the hell are you doing?" Ray's over his shoulder trying to pull him off "What the hell is going on?" As he pulls Jason back he can see who it is lying on the ground "OH MY GOD! CJ!? "he looks at Jason confused "What the hell is going on? I thought, I mean she was…."

"DEAD?! Yeah, yeah that's what I thought too. But it seems she's not!"

"What the hell's she doing here then?"

"I have no idea, I told her before to stay dead or I wouldn't be held responsible for my actions"

"Wait! WHAT? You knew she was alive? "

"Yeah, yeah I found out when I went to Washington "he sighs sitting back on the grass

"Hang on this is all too much. How the hell … I mean why? Why would she do this?" Ray can't get his words out, let alone get his thoughts together.

"DAD?... Dad what's going on?"

CJ looks away as Jason lets go. He looks up worried as Mikey now stands next to Ray

"Nothing son, the lady just fainted. You go back to your food. Go on Mikey, it's all right. Mikey will you just go back! "

Mikey frowns and looks at Ray "Just go back to the others it's fine! Like your Dad said the Lady just fainted. We'll be over in a minute" Ray reassures him

Jason hoists her to her feet "GET the _fuck_ out of here, _NOW!_ "

She nods crying "Yeah, okay sure! As long as we can talk soon. Jason, just call me... please?"

"Wait Jason …what the hell?" Rays frowns confused "You're' just gonna send her away. What about her son? Doesn't he deserve to know his Mom's not dead?"

"NO! No Ray. He doesn't need to know. Look he doesn't need to be confused by this. What for her to pull this shit again when she feels like she's had enough?"

"Jason please? I'm begging you, Ray's right. I won't mess him around again, I promise "

"NO!...No you're not going anywhere near him! You need to get out of here right now, before I do something you might regret" He runs his hand through this hair "Look at the state of you! You just don't change" he takes a deep breath "Go! Go be sad drunk somewhere else and not near my kids"

"Hey" Sonny frowns as he now comes over "What's going on? Mikey said some one fainted."

Ray shakes his head "Trust me brother, you don't wanna know!"

Sonny frowns even more confused as Jason leans back and he sees who's standing behind him. He's totally confused and in state of disbelief  
"What the _fuck?!_ Jason? " he frowns "Okay so what the hell's going on here? This is a joke right?" She looks away not able to look Sonny in the face as he frowns at her "What the fuck is _she_ doing here and _HOW?_ I mean .. I don't get this" He looks back over towards the kids "We need to get her out of here before … well before anyone else sees her"

"Yeah, yeah you're right, take my truck Sonny. Them go dump her back wherever it is she came from"

"Jason please! Please, just let me see Jaycee!"

He's in her face now " _That's not happening!_ "

Sonny goes and gets Jason's truck and gets hold of her collar, pulling her with him as he shoves her towards the open passenger door. "JASON!" she screams "Please I'm begging you" she's getting angry now "I'm coming for my son! You can't stop me!"

" _Watch me_!" he's right in her face "You're having _nothing_ to do with him, ever!"

She takes a deep breath "I'll see you in court if I have to. But I _will_ get my son!"

" _GET_.. the.. fuck in there and shut your whiney mouth!" Sonny pushes her into the passenger seat and slams the door shut

"Jason…. I'm giving you a chance to make this easy. I won't have that bitch Mandy anywhere near him Do you understand me. You keep her away"

"Mandy?" Jason laughs "Whats this gotta do with this? CJ you're drunk, go home and stay there!"

"You let her near him, and I'll make sure next time… next time she won't get away!"

"What?... What the hell are you talking about?"

"I'm warning you Jason!... LET ME SEE my son!"

"Sonny get her drunken ass out of here, before I really lose my temper!"

Sonny does as he's told, puts the truck in drive and pulls away. She leans back in the seat and starts to cry "Sonny speak to him, please!"

"I'm not speaking to Jason about this you need to shut the fuck up! You should have stayed dead that was best for everyone! God I should have killed you myself." She starts drunkenly crying as he drives, "Anyway, where the hell am I taking you?"

She concedes closing her eyes. She decides that she probably needs to sleep "Um...the Redgate hotel"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They've been driving for half an hour "Sonny slow down!" she frowns in the side mirror

What?"

"Just slow down!"

"No!...No, the faster I get you out of here the better!"

"No just slow a minute. I think we're being followed"

"Hell, if this is one of your games to stop me taking you back, then forget it "

"No Sonny it's not" She continues to look in the mirror " Sonny DRIVE! Drive! He's got a gun!"

Sonny speeds up as he now sees the gun in in his mirror "Shit!"

A motorcycle comes along side and points the gun as Sonny indicating for him to pull over, before shooting at the front tire and then speeding off. The truck veers across road and comes to stop by a small wooded area. They sit for a moment, gathering their thoughts. Then they hear a voice from behind,

The black 4x4 sitting beside them shouts "Ms Lewis! Step out of the vehicle with your hands in the air "

"Sonny take this!" she hands him her gun

"What the hell? CJ we can't shoot our way out of here. We're outnumbered"

She slides over beside him "You don't need to shoot anyone, but whatever you do, whatever they say, you don't let me go or they will kill you! Sonny I'm the only thing that's going to protect you now!"

"What the hell?"

"Point that gun at me. Sonny, they want me alive, so you need to make the believe you will kill me!"

He rolls his eyes "Yeah well that shouldn't be too hard" he drags her out of the truck, holding her in front of him, tight to his chest "Okay!... back off or I'll kill her. I got nothin to lose!"

"You don't mean that, Mr…? Just hand her over and we will let you go"

Sonny falters for a moment wondering if that's true. She frowns she can feel his arm relax around her "Sonny they won't let you go. They will kill you trust me; I know these people. I'm the only thing keeping you alive!"

"Oh, I will kill her! I tell ya that would suit me just fine for her to be gone!" He starts walking back wards into the wooded area he holds CJ in front of him they get further into the undergrowth "On three, get ready to run" he turns and checks back where they're going " Okay Three, two ... run!"

They disappear into the undergrowth and the sounds of shots ring out behind them. Just as the guns sound the police patrol car comes up and around the corner of the hill. The two-armed men put their guns away as the patrol car drives past. The cops inside are suspicious and they come to a stop further the road. The officers watching in the rear-view mirrors and then they turn around and drive back

"Let's get-out of here we don't need any questions"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They run deeper into the wooded area and find a place to hide "Do you see them?"

"No .. no not now. Who the hell are they?"

She shakes her head " I have no idea"

"Don't bullshit me CJ " he looks around he can't see much the lights starting to fade. "As always this is something to do with you. What the hell are you involved in?" He slumps down for a moment catching his breath and looks at his phone Shit! "No signal! Why are they after you? CJ are you listening, what the hell's this about?"

"I don't know. Seriously, I don't know! I have no idea who knew I was here. There was only me and my brother, so it doesn't make any sense"

"I swear if you're playing games"

She leans back catching her breath "I'm not. It could be anything. I really don't know!" They sit quiet for what seems like an age then eventually they hear what sounds like the truck driving off Pheww! she leans back

"What the fuck was that all about?"

"How many times do I need to say I DON'T KNOW!" she runs her hand through her hair

"What the hell are you involved in? You know this... all this. It isn't you. You used to be stopping bad guys, not being one. You just bring trouble now and you really wanna drag Jason and Jaycee into this?"

"No! No, of course I don't" she shakes her head "I just wanted to see my son. Is that so wrong?"

"I don't know, don't ask me that. I don't understand you anymore. Don't get what you're about. I never did see Jason's fascination with you, but now .. I just don't get him at all"

"I didn't choose this Sonny" she sighs "Do you how long I've tried to get out…" she stops and closes her eyes "Oh it doesn't matter. You wouldn't understand" she laughs "I'm just doing what I need to do"

"You're doing what _you_ need to do? No, you're not. What you need to do is go back to where you came from and stay there away from us."

"So, says you!" hmmm! She takes a deep breath and stands up to make a move. As she does they can suddenly hear voices coming from the darkness.

"CJ get down! We're sitting ducks here if they come back"

She looks at Sonny and then back into the darkness as she bites her lip thinking "You know what? I think I'll take my chances".

She kicks Sonny hard in the stomach. He goes down, falling onto the ground clutching at his gut and as he does she snatches her gun back.

"Geez!... CJ! What the hell?!"he grimaces in pain "I said get down you stupid bitch, you're gonna get us both killed"

"Oh, _fuck_ you Sonny!"

As the voices get nearer she goes to walk away leaving Sonny by himself, vulnerable and in pain but he manages to make a sudden, unexpected grab at her leg, and she comes crashing down to the ground beside him. As she falls there's a thud as she hits her head on a large rock. She lies still. Not moving.

"Shit!... CJ?." Sonny sits up "Hey, come on wake up!" _Fuck!_ He looks at the side of her head and he can see there's blood coming out "Oh Jesus! CJ come on stop messing around!" he feels for a pulse but can't find it. As he also listens to the voices that he can hear getting nearer. Now he sees the glow from the flashlight in the dark. _Shit!_ He grabs the gun "Oh God!"

He's trying to think what to do. His priority to get away. He has no idea who these people in the darkness are and he gets up and runs. As he finally gets to the road. he can see the police patrol car parked by his truck "Ah…. Shit"

The two officers come out of the trees "Hey you freeze! Drop the gun, or we'll shoot!"

Sonny puts his hands up "I can explain! Someone attacked me. Shot the front tire out. You can see!"

"What're you doing in there? You alone?"

"Yeah, yeah I'm alone. I um... I ran when they shot at me. I thought they were gonna rob me. I got away and hid " hes not sure why he told this story but for now, until he has time to think, he doesn't want any more awkward questions

" Cuff him "

"Wait! What? Hey, I just explained"

"Yeah well you can explain again... downtown!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sonny's back at his apartment. The cops bought his robbery story well at least for now. He pours a very large whiskey and starts to drink. His hands are shaking as the adrenaline and panic surges through his body. "Geez! What a night!" He rubs his face; he can feel the warming fire of the whiskey going down his throat.

"Sonny? what the hell's happened?" Clay frowns as he comes in the door and puts his keys down. He can feel the vibe coming from Sonny's direction, and it's not good. "You look like Shit! What's going on?"

Sonny gulps back the drink and pours another.

"Sonny steady, man! So, you gonna tell me what happened, to cause this?"

"Oh Clay!" Sonny swallows hard, he's nearly ready to break down in tears. He's deathly white, his hands shaking.  
Clay's worried, has never seen him like this before. Even in the most intense situations, Sonny is always calm. "Clay I done something', something, _real_ bad!" He knows he probably shouldn't tell anyone, but he thinks he might crack if he doesn't. He trusts Clay more than anyone else in the world. He hopes he will listen, before judging him

"Hey man.." Clay frowns worried "…what the hell is it? Just calm down, it can't be that bad. Just tell me and we'll sort it!"

Sonny drinks the next drink back and just refills the glass continuously as Clay watches him "Sonny, what the hell's going on?" he frowns looking at his blank expression "Sonny, talk to me man!"

Sonny gulps and takes a deep breath "I didn't mean to. It was an accident. You gotta believe me!"

"Believe you? Why what's happened?"

"I mean…I know I've always said it but.. you have to believe me it was an accident. I just… grabbed her leg and she fell! Oh, shit Clay!"

As he starts to drink again, Clay comes and takes the glass out of his hand "Okay sit down! Now tell me, what the hell happened?"

"I think I killed her"

"Killed her? Killed who?" Clay frowns "Sonny who?"

"She fell Clay. Hit her head. I don't know, I couldn't feel a pulse"

"Who hit her head?" Sonny is rambling, forgetting Clay doesn't know CJ is still alive. He swallows hard "CJ… she hit her head!"

"I don't understand. Sonny are you okay? How much have you had to drink? Do you remember CJ took an overdose, she's... she's dead, right?"

"She isn't, she turned up at Jason's earlier today. She's alive Clay! She was, until I killed her"

Clay's confused "Sonny none of this makes sense. What the hell are you going on about? Where is she if she's alive where is she? " his frown deepens "Sonny where did she fall? Sonny if you're right … we have to go get her" He picks up his cell phone he can't deal with this on his own

"Who the hell you callin? No, don't be calling Jason! Please man don't tell him. Clay, it was an accident"

"Sonny just calm down. I'm not calling Jason" Clay gets on the phone "Ray! You need to come to Sonny's. We got a problem"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They're all out in the dark by the road. Sonny's truck hasn't been towed yet "So where? Sonny where did it happen?

"I don't know! I can't remember, we went through them trees. I weren't thinking. We were just getting away "

Clay shakes his head "Geez we could be here all night!" even though Ray's explained everything to Clay he still can't get his head round what's happened

"It's alright brother we'll sort this, don't worry "Ray picks up his phone.

Sonny puts his hand on it "NO man! Please don't call Jason. I can't face him right now, not if I've killed her. He'll never forgive me. _Shit!_ What the hell have I done!?" Sonny drops down to the floor trying to hold himself together

"I'm not calling Jason" He had considered but at this point they need to know if she's dead or alive "Brock … yeah it's Ray… look we've got a problem…. Can you bring the dog"?

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Brock arrives with Cerberus, and Trent in tow." I figured what you told me, if she's hurt we might need him?"

Ray nods "Yeah!...yeah good idea"

"Oh god!" Sonny's still can't believe what's happened

Clay's really worried about him now "Sonny man, just hold in there. We'll find her" He really doesn't know what to think or say at this point. His head is as messed up as everyone else. Sonny is losing the plot, with too much drink inside him. Clay takes Ray to one side, while Brock sends the dog off in a search for her "Ray, what're we gonna do if … if you know?"

"Let's just find her first, okay? Then we'll deal with that "

"Are we gonna tell Jason?"

"Geez! I don't know" he rubs his head "I mean that's one hell of a secret to keep if not"

Clay shakes his "Why the hell did she come back?

Ray shrugs "I think not seeing her kid, it was messing with her head more than even she knew it would?!"

"HEY!... HEY GUYS! … Cerb's got something!" They all look at each other and follow on behind Brock and the Dog

"Oh Shit!" Sonny rubs his head

"Sonny stay calm!"

They arrive in a clearing that Sonny thinks he recognises "Yeah Man, this was it! Here right here … that's where she hit her head "he points to the rock "and that's where I left her!"

They see some blood on the rock in the torch light and Cerberus stands barking "She's not here now though? So, where they hell did she go?"

"Well I guess she's not dead then?" Clay frowns

"Unless someone took her?" everyone turns and looks at Trent "Well it's something we might have to consider" he shrugs

"Yeah he's right" Ray bites his lip trying to work things out "If someone came after her, they might have come back?" he pauses and looks at Cerberus "Brock, did the dog find anything else?"

"No! but we can check the area again if you want?"

"Yeah, let's do it. Let's be sure she's not here. If she's injured she might only have got so far"

Brock gets Cerb to start checking the site and he heads off in another direction back towards the road. They all follow as quick as they can through the dense undergrowth "Look, someone's climbed through here. Look, back out there on to the road. You see the way the bushes are down?"

"You think she has, or someone's pulled her through there?"

"Where the hell would she be?" Clay thinks for a moment "Sonny where were you taking her? When Jason said take her back. Where did she ask you to go?"

"Um…" he stalls, he can't think, he brain trying to process everything. His mind overwhelmed, worrying about what Jason's gonna say.

"Sonny, c'mon think man!"

"Oh yeah, the Redgate hotel. Yeah, yeah Redgate"

"Redgate?"

"I dunno …. She was gonna give me directions. I'd never heard of it!"

Trent searches on his phone "Okay, it looks like some exclusive private boutique hotel. Says you have to be member to stay there. WOW! Shit! It's s _eriously_ expensive. Check this out!" He shows the phone to Spenser and Ray "some info on the search says it's one of them places rich oligarchs stay, when they're here!" he frowns as he looks at Ray

"Hmmm! Well she'll fit right in then. What the hell is she into?"

"I don't know. But I do know, those guys who came after us, they were well armed"

They all look at each other. "Nothing makes any sense" Ray rubs his head "Let's get back, and for now. Not a word to Jason!" Ray looks at them all one by one "It won't do any good, him being involved. Not until, we know what's happened to her"

"I don't know don't you think we should speak to him. What if he finds out? He gonna go nuts!"

"Sonny, just stay calm, alright!" Clay puts his hand on his shoulder he can see the mess his friend is in right now.

Ray rubs his beard trying to think "Okay, Clay you take Sonny back to his, get him cleaned up and then check around a few local hospitals. Just to see if she went and got herself looked at. I mean if she knocked herself out she's gonna have a big wound. Brock …. "he sighs "Thanks for the help but take Cerberus home, and get some rest. We'll call if we need ya again. Trent you come with me; we'll go check this hotel out. See if she's gone back there. We'll come back to yours when we know more"

Clay nods "Come on Sonny let's get you home" Sonny nods he's still in a dazed world of his own "it's gonna be alright man… at least it looks like she's not dead"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They arrive back at the apartment and now Lisa's there and she's in the kitchen making coffee "Geez! You guys made me jump. I didn't know where you were. I've tried callin', but you didn't answer. Is everything okay?" She looks at Sonny's face "Sonny, where have you been?" He doesn't answer and she frowns "Sonny?... whats wrong?" she looks back and forth between Sonny and Clay neither is answering

"Nothing! Nothing's wrong!" he swallows hard

"Sonny that's a lie. Why are you lying to me?" she frowns again "Clay what the hell's happened?"

"Let's just let him get a shower and cleaned up. Then I'll explain" he watches as Sonny fills up yet another glass with whiskey "Sonny, put that down, man. Let's get you cleaned up"

Sonny nods "Geez… what a fuckin' mess! How the hell did I let this happen?"

"Sonny it's gonna be alright, whatever's happened it was an accident. Everyone knows you would never have really killed her!"

"But I said it enough times. My god, I've threatened her enough times. There were witnesses to threats I made. No one's gonna believe me Clay!. "He's almost hysterical now "I'm gonna go down for this, and you know the worst thing, Jason and that little boy are gonna hate me for the rest of my days!"

Clay bites his lip "Sonny c'mon, you're being dramatic. Don't think like that. It's not gonna come to that. It doesn't even look like she's dead so just go and take a shower. Get this mud off, you'll feel better. Hopefully Ray will be back with some news before you come out?!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

CJ puts her hand on the side of her head and gently massages the large bump. The cut is still sore she gulps down the large whiskey as she leans back in her large office chair _Shit!_ Her headache is blinding her, and she takes some painkillers. She looks at her cell phone on her desk as the call comes in. This is the fifth time Daniel has called and this time she answers it. "Daniel, what!?"

"Catherine, where the hell are you? They said you checked out. This message you left me makes no sense. What the hell's going on?"

"Yeah! I'm back in Washington. I got a flight. Sorry I couldn't get hold of you. I ran into some trouble and I need to sort it out. Where were you anyway?"

"With a friend .. I told you"

"What friend?" she frowns "How did you meet her?"

"Does it matter? I met her in a bar the last time I was down here. When you sent me to sort the Ellis thing, give her the target package" he swallows hard trying to not sound flustered. He's normally calm, but Catherine is the one person who makes him anxious. Also, the one person who knows when he's lying.

"Just be careful Daniel" she frowns "I don't know what's going on here, but someone came after me. I don't know who it was yet So just make sure this _friend_ is who she says she is" She takes another sip of her drink "Look um. don't worry about me. I'll see you when you get back"

She rubs her head and grimaces as and takes another drink, then she shakes more painkillers into her hand, washing them down with the whiskey. She leans back, leaning her aching head against the back of the leather chair. She absorb the effects off the tablets and drink. Hoping the ache will go and she'll be able to think more clearly.

She picks up her cell phone and dials one of her contacts "Yeah it's me. I need you to find out who my brothers' new _friend_ is Can you do that for me? Thanks!" _I don't know what you're up to Daniel, but I will find out!_

She looks at the new surveillance photos that are laid on her desk of Jason and Jaycee as she takes a deep long sigh and picks up her phone again "Bill…" she smiles "It's Catherine Lewis"

"Catherine long time no speak!"

"Yeah too long. Look, um … I need a favor" she sips her drink "You dealt with all that stuff of my father. With Daniel, the custody arrangements, keeping the mother quiet"

"Yes! Yes, I did but that was a long time ago. I'm retired now."

"Yeah I know you're retired; I'm not asking you to do anything. I just um….I need your recommendation"

"Okay, recommendation for what?"

"A family lawyer. Someone who can do whatever it takes, to get the right outcome for their client. I mean whatever it takes Do you know someone?"

"Who's the Client?"

she pauses for a moment "The client is me"

"Well then yes!. Yes, I know someone!"

She sips her drink "That's great! Can you text me their number? Thanks Bill. We will have to catch up soon" She leans back in her chair and closes her eyes, gently rubbing the large lump on her head with her fingers. _Awww! SHIT!_ " _Fuck,_ that's sore!" She shakes off the dizziness  
"You're gonna pay for this Sonny Quinn"


	58. Chapter 58

"Catherine... " Daniel frowns waiting in the doorway watching as she gathers files and her laptop, shoving them into a bag. "what are you doing?"

"Oh ... I'm going away, just for a few days. I've got a meeting and some things to take care of"  
She looks up seeing the questioning expression on his face "Don't look like that. I said, it's just a few days, maybe a week tops. I'll let you know when I'm coming back"

"Where?" His frown deepens "Where are you going?"

"Um..." she sighs, stalling for time. Hesitating whether to tell him as she' knows he's not going to like it "Virginia Beach"

"WHAT?! Oh my god, why?"

"I told you I've got a meeting" again she hesitates, still clearing the files on the desk "You know what, why don't you come with me? You could see your _friend_?" She smiles

"I'm still confused as to _why_ you're going? Who are you meeting there?" his frown deepens the lines furrowing on his forehead "Catherine, what the hell're you up to?"

"Nothing! Really, I just need to meet with someone. Hey guess what...I'm staying at the Redgate." she smiles trying to tempt him "I know you like that place. You could bring your _friend_ " she smiles, as she tries to reassure him" I'm sure she'd like it?" She sighs, still able to see his hesitant reluctance "Daniel, we can go visit the grave. We didn't get to do that. We'd have more time. C'mon, what do you say, some _family_ time" she smiles "I know how family's important to you"

"What I say is, I'm not sure _you_ going to Virginia Beach is such a good. I still don't know what you're up to. So, yeah, I'll come. But mainly so I can keep an eye on you"

"Oh..." she smiles "so nothing to do with sea bass at the Redgate then?"

"Well, now you mention it.." he laughs "there is a plus side"

 _SHIT!_ "Oh, damn it!" She sighs annoyed. As she hurriedly gathers her things the photos of JC fall out from inside one of her files, dropping all over the floor.

Daniel frowns as he helps pick them up for her "You know you're right, what you said. He is getting big now"

She looks at the photos and smiles, studying each of them carefully as she puts them back in the brown card file cover "Daniel, do you know where were these photographs were taken?"

"Um .. " he looks at the one in her hand "I guess at the park. Must be somewhere they go locally. Why?"

"These last ones, they're different. Why is he with Clay in all of them?"

He frowns, looking at her he wonders why she always has to question everything. Why does she have to make things so hard on herself. "From what I remember, it's mainly when the other kid has something on, like hockey practice. I think Hayes takes him there on his own and I guess he gets Spenser to look after him" he points the photo of Clay "Perhaps he likes to take him to the park. Who cares?!"

"So, Clay looks after him on his own?" she frowns still studying the color photograph she has in her hand "Does anyone else look after him?"

"No, not that I know"

"And Ellis? She's never looked after him, right?"

"No!" he laughs "No, well I've never seen anything to suggests she does. Why does it matter who looks after him? Surely that's for Jason to decide. I mean, it's not like he's leaving him with strangers if that's what you're worried."

"Can you forward that intel to me, and anything else you have on this"

"Um...yeah sure. Catherine please... you really need to start letting this go"

"I can't!" she looks up at him and then back to the photographed filled file "I just can't! Daniel, I need to see him"

"Oh no!" Daniel sighs stepping forward. Taking the file from her hand he puts his arms around her "Catherine you know I'm sorry about all this and I wish ..." he sighs, taking a deep breath "I wish I could this, put everything right and get your kids back but I can't and you can't go and see him" he steps back looking her in the face "Please tell me this is not the reason you're going to Virginia Beach?"

"No!" She smiles, brushing his arms way "No really. I told you I have a meeting. Look um...can I get you to make your own hotel arrangements, there's some things I need to take care of first"

"Yeah...yeah sure. I'll go and sort it now" he frowns watching her apprehensively. He's still not sure what her _real_ plans are but he has a feeling he won't to like them.

"Daniel..." she calls stopping him before he leaves " thanks. I know you mean well."

She stares watching until he closes the door before she slides the whiskey filled crystal glass from its hiding place on her desk. Taking a large sip of the warm colored liquid she opens the email on her cell phone.

Shaking her head, she takes a long deep sigh. _Alright then Daniel, let's see who you've been hiding!_

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay mulls over the idea of calling the contact in his phone, his thumb hovering tentatively over the button. If this is still the right number, will she answer.

He has to do something, Sonny's been a nervous wreck in the week since the _incident_ happened and Ray's getting to the point that he wants to tell Jason.

Finally, he makes a decision and presses call but just as he does, Sonny appears from the bedroom doorway and he quickly cuts it off. " Hey man, how you doin? Did you manage to get some sleep last night?"

"Yeah a bit" Sonny frowns. The first thing he does is pours himself a large glass of drink from the Jack Daniels bottle on the side.

"Hey Sonny, maybe lay of off the booze today, yeah?"

"It's just a small one. I need it to get me through" he cocks his eyebrows at Clay "We still haven't heard anythin' What the hell're we gonna do?"

"I don't know yet" Clay sighs, hesitating before answering "Look, we'll think of something okay. Try not to keep worrying. She made it out of the woods, so we know she's not dead."

"Do we though Clay? What if those guys came back and took her?"

"No, what I meant was at least you know _you_ didn't kill her!"

"Yeah, but I don't know that for sure. Clay, I left her, and I didn't get help" he sighs taking another swig from the drink "I could have told the cops she was there, but I didn't. You know as soon as we tell Jason what I did he's ... he's gonna flip, man.

They look up at the sudden loud knock at the door.

Clay answers it "Hey... Ray. How you doin?"

"Yeah good man. Just come to see how things are?" he sighs looking at Sonny drinking "Hey brother, how you holdin up?"

"I'm okay, better now. I slept some last night"

"Well not being funny..." Clay laughs " you look like shit! Sonny, seriously man, you're gonna have to get it together or Jason's gonna know somethin's wrong"

"Yeah well, I'd feel better if I just knew for sure where she was."

"Sonny..." Clay looks at Ray and sighs " why don't you go grab a shower. I'll fix you something to eat. Go on!" Waiting until they can hear the water running Clay turns looking at Ray "What the hell are we gonna do? He can't carry on like this. It's eating him up and he's drinking, too much. Ray, I don't know what to do here, he's losin' his mind"

"You know I'm worried too" Ray sighs "I've been thinking about this and ...we'll I can't see we have a choice man, we're gonna have to tell Jason"

"Yeah..." Clay sighs, reluctantly nodding "yeah you're right. But um.." he closes his eyes while he thinks "There's one other thing we could try first. I could ... I could call her."

"Call her?" Ray frowns

"Yeah, I still have her number ... well I think, it's still her number. To be fair I thought about doing it earlier, just to see if she would answer. That way we definitely know she's alive."

Ray rubs his beard while he thinks and Clay shrugs "Hey, I'm gonna leave as your call man, you know what's best"

"Hey, don't put this on me. I don't know what's best anymore, for anyone. I do know we got limited choices " he sighs again" Okay... alright, do it! See if she answers"

Clay hits call on the contact screen. It dials. It keeps ringing and then goes straight to voice mail. Clay closes his eyes _Shit! "_ No answer"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

Catherine stops unpacking her case and frowns at the sound of her cell. Looking over to where it's laid on the dresser in the hotel room she checks the caller ID

"Clay!?" she frowns confused as to why he would be calling her number and takes a seat on the bed. She keeps look as she contemplates answering. Then deciding against she watches as he calls again "What the hell do you want Clay?" she frowns watching at it goes again to voicemail. As the notification flashes up, she lets out a big sigh and plays back the recorded message.

"CJ?" There's a long hesitant pause "CJ, it's Clay. Can you pick up? Please" There's lots of long pauses between his words like he's apprehensive about leaving the message. She can hear the deep breaths he takes in between his words "CJ, I just need to know you're okay. Please.. please just call me back, let me know you're alright"

"What the hell?" she frowns, confused wondering why he's calling her like this, now. "Oh..." she smiles "Oh, of course. Sonny... he will have told you what happened" biting her lip she laughs "Oh, well I think he can sweat it a bit longer"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

"I tried" Clay shrugs "All we can hope now is that she picks up the message and calls me back"

Ray shakes his head and frowns as Sonny comes out of the bathroom. He stands, wrapped only in towel, in the doorway staring at both of them "What's wrong? Did somethin happen?"

"No, no nothing's wrong. Everything's fine ... look, I'll fix you something to eat"

"You know I was um... I was thinkin' maybe we could hit the bar, just for a while. Get some food there, you know down a few beers. What'dya say?"

"Yeah ... yeah sounds good. Probably do you some good to get out of here. " Clay sighs he's actually happy at this suggestion, even if it's to go to the bar because it means Sonny's willing to get dressed and leave the apartment, maybe return to some normal life.

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-o**

The bar's busy and soon Sonny gets Clay reluctantly hitting tequila shots

"Hey, Sonny man, steady!" he laughs, warning him to slow down as his friend drunkenly falls backwards on to the table behind.

"Hey Sonny..." Ray frowns "Sonny slow down. We don't wanna be gettin in no more trouble. You get what I mean" Ray's already eased up on his drinks, worried that Sonny, and Clay are already drinking too much.

He sighs, lost in his thoughts. He knows reality is that he will probably have to be the one to tell Jason, about what happened with CJ and Sonny, and that he longer they leave it, the harder it will be to explain. He frowns continuing to watch as they order and then consume another tray of tequila shots.

Clay's at the pool table, with some hot random bar fly. Sonny leans against the bar watching them when he feels the gentle tap on his shoulder

"So, cowboy you gonna buy me a drink?" Lisa smiles " You know I'd wondered where you been, haven't heard from you all week. I was kinda missin' ya"

"Yeah you know, I been missin' ya too. Look, I was gonna call but.. well somethings came up and my heads not been right " he takes a deep breath eyeing her up and down then he smiles "So um.. ...whatya say, Clay's there getting chatted up and playin pool, you know that means?"

She frowns, shaking her head "No what?"

"Well means, I have an empty apartment" he smiles, chewing his gum as he gives her a big teasing grin

"So..." she bites her lip flirtly " what're you suggestin there cowboy?"

" I'm suggestin, we go back and make my apartment a lil less empty"

"Well..." she smiles thinking about them being together "sounds good to me!"

"Hey _RAY!_ " Sonny shouts across the bar to him "Lisa's gonna drive me home. I've had enough for tonight. Let Blondie know that I'll see him later. Tell him not ta hurry"

Ray frowns, finishing up his beer "You know I'm gonna head off now too. You um.. you think Clay can handle _that_ all by himself?"

"Oh yeah... yeah I guess he can" Sonny smiles then whistles over "Hey CLAY, we gonna head off! You um... you stay, with ya new lady _friend_. I could do with some peace and quiet" he winks as he looks down at Lisa

Clay puts his hand up acknowledging the hinted request. He takes a deep breath sighing _  
Shit! Now I'm gonna have to listen to this girl for a while longer._ He smiles awkwardly looking at her. She really isn't his type even for a one-night stand "Um... you know what, I need another drink. I'll be right back"

At the bar he sighs rubbing his head. "Beer and two shots of tequila!"

As the barman brings the bottle and pours the shots in front of him a female hand grabs one of the shots and necks it back. She then picks up his bottle of beer and puts it seductively to her lips "You not buying yourself one of these? I mean, we can share if you'd rather, I really don't mind!"

He turns ready to berate her for taking his drink but his mouth falls open with shock at the smile that greets him

"Oh my god!...CJ?!" he gasps looking her up and down as she stands only inches away from him "What the hell are you doing here? Do you know I've been trying to reach you?" he frowns "Sonny's going out of his mind with worry about what happened to you"

"Really?" she smiles "Oh that's such a shame. Pity I'm not there to see it." She laughs "So what do you want, I mean I got your message that's why I'm here"

"That was it, I wanted to know that you were okay, for Sonny I mean"

"For Sonny? Okay, well here I am ...alive and very well! Apart from this really sore head. So, I guess Sonny can stop worrying now." she continues to smile, watching him. She has this wicked; teasing look on her face. Smiling she picks up the second tequila and knocks it back then laughs "So, you getting one of these for yourself?"

"Jesus! " he smiles stunned, unable to do anything but stare at her standing there " You know, you're unbelievable. You just stroll in here, just like nothing's happened" He sighs, taking his cell from his pocket

"Woah! Wait!" she frowns "Who're you calling?"

"Sonny. I need to tell him, that you're okay"

"No!" She takes his phone from his hand "No, he can wait. C'mon..." she picks up the beer "get yourself a beer and I'll kick your ass at pool first"

"C.J, I need to tell Sonny he..."

"Shhh! Clay, c'mon have some fun with me first" She smiles, dragging him towards the pool table.

The girl who was chatting with him earlier frowns, stepping in front of CJ "Um... don't wanna be rude lady, but we were was here first!"

"Do I look like I care?" CJ smiles as she stands inches from the girl's face, totally unfazed by her comment "Tell you what..." she points to a guy on a stool by the bar on his own "Why don't you go try over there, this one's taken now"

She doesn't back down and just keeps staring and the girl becomes concerned by her stance. Not wanting any trouble, she picks up her purse from the chair. Before she leaves she sneers at Clay "Could've told me you had a girlfriend!"

"Goodbye!" CJ smiles, waving her away while she casually racks up the pool balls. Sipping from the beer, she took from Clay at the bar "You wanna go first or should I?"

"Why the hell didn't you let Sonny know you were okay?"

"Oh, are you still going on about that?" she sighs continuing drinking the beer "Where would the fun be in telling him?"

Clay frowns "CJ, he's been going out of his mind. He thought you were dead. He thought... he .. he thought he'd killed you, by accident"

"Did he care he'd killed me? Did he tell the police where I was?"

"No" Clay sighs he can't disagree Sonny didn't tell anyone "No but... but he said it was an accident. That you fell and hit your head"

"An accident?" she laughs "Okay, is that what he told Jason, that he thought he killed me _by accident?_ "

"No. No cos we didn't tell Jason, not yet"

"You didn't?" she frowns "WOW! So, you're all going behind his back. That's something, you know, I didn't expect. Does Ray know?" She watches as Clay doesn't answer her "He does.. oh my god Ray knows Sonny tried to kill me and he didn't tell Jason. Wow! I thought he'd have learned from last time about keeping things secret from Jason"

"Sonny, didn't try to kill you. It was an accident"

"Trust me Clay, it wasn't an accident. He meant it!" she runs her hand through her hair and takes a large swig from the beer bottle "But I can see why he'd say that and why you'd wanna believe him. I bet he made it sound convincing didn't he? The boo hoo it was an accident!"

"So, what?" Clay frowns "What, you're saying it wasn't an accident?"

"No, it wasn't! Oh God Clay, you know how much he hated me. He was so angry and then he pushed me. He seriously wanted to kill me. I mean c'mon, it's not like he hasn't threatened me before, is it" she shakes her head and sighs " Said he was gonna make sure for himself this time."

She stand quietly watching for a reaction from Clay " I had trouble getting away from him, he stole my gun. You know, I think he would have shot me if he had the chance" she continues to stare wondering if he's taking on board her version of events "Oh you know what, there's not point trying to explain, of course you're gonna believe Sonny over me. Why wouldn't you." she continues to smile trying to tease him "You know Clay, all I wanted to do was see Jaycee. Surely _you_ can understand, a _need_ to see your child?"

"I don't know CJ" he sighs, closing his eyes trying to block her out "It doesn't make sense. Sonny wouldn't do that" he frowns "Still...at least you're okay. I guess that's the important thing."

"Yeah you'd think so right. Look, what story Sonny told I don't care anymore" She looks at the floor "I'm um.. I'm gonna get another beer. You want one?"

He watches her frowning he's wondering if she really is telling the truth. Wondering what if Sonny really did lie to cover himself. "Yeah sure"

It's late and the bar's closing up and as they leave CJ and Clay are laughing. They're both so very drunk that they can hardly stand up as they get out into the cool night air of the parking lot.

"Okay, so, I let you beat me!" she smiles "I wanted there to be a first time for everything"

"Oh, you _let me_ beat you. Oh okay! Sure." he smiles watching as she doubles over unable to stop laughing " C.J what the hell are you laughing at?"

"I don't know I just am!" she rubs her head "Oh god! " she puts her hand on him holding herself up "I think I've had too much to drink!" She bites her lip as she watches him staggering around and starts to laugh again "Stand still you're making me feel seasick"

Glancing around the now deserted parking lot he smiles "Do you remember the first time we were here, alone. It was the night we first met"

 _Umm hmmm!_ She smiles, teasingly stepping forward, her hand stroking his arm "Yeah, yeah I do. If I remember it right, you were trying to be my hero that night" she smiles, locking her arms around his neck.

"Yeah..." he smiles awkwardly. He can feel the heaving of her chest pressed up tight against his body ".. and _if_ I remember, you said not every girl needs a hero" he locks his arm around her waist "Little did know you really didn't need one." he grins.

In the orange glow of the streetlight he can see just how drunk she is, a tempting glint in her eye as he remembers just how sexy she is.

"Oh, did I really say that?" she frowns. _Hmmm!_ "Must have been drunk that night as well, because well... I was wrong. I think I found my hero that night"

She smiles holding up a key on the end of her finger dangling it in front of him. He frowns, in his drunken state he can't make out what it is "What's that key for?"

"A key to my cheap motel room." she smiles, brushing her lips over his "You know, we could get pizza delivery there. If you fancy something to eat?"

Clay smiles but he's so drunk it takes him time for him to register what she's asking. Then suddenly he pushes her back, unwrapping her arms from round his neck "CJ, this isn't a good idea!"

"Oh okay!" She frowns taken aback by his sudden unwillingness "Yeah, yeah you're probably right. Bad idea CJ" she bites her lip, still trying to tease him " Sorry!" she laughs stumbling around in front of him "I guess I should ...should get a cab and leave. I need to sleep this tequila off"

"Wait what, you're still gonna stay there?" he laughs " At that motel. Alone!"

"Yup! Just me and... my lonely motel room. You know..." she smiles, whispering in his ear " no one knows I'm there"

She's doing that thing, where she bites the corner of her lip. Clay can't help but think how sexy she looks. Then she herself back against the brick wall, using it to steady herself

 _Pheww!_ "I feel so hot!" She pushes her hair back laughing wickedly "Seriously Clay, I've had _way_ too much to drink." She keeps staring at him, watching his face. The expressions change as he watches her unbutton her shirt. "Are you... _sure_ you don't wanna come back to my motel room? That there's nothing you wanna order from the menu?" she keeps eye contact and continues to wave the motel key in front of him.

"C.J..." He's up close in front of her, his eyes scanning all over her body. _Oh god!_ He closes his eyes, his head in turmoil "You know I... I want to but you know why I can't"

"Clay..." she leans forward, her hands grabbing his face as she starts to passionately kiss him "it's just one night" she lets out this sexy deep breath "That's all I want. Just one night with you" she hitches her skirt up and taking his hand in hers she places it against the flesh on her thigh. "And no one needs to know."

His heart is beating hard in his chest "You sure no one knows you're here?"

"No! No one." she smiles as she unbuttons the rest of her shirt. It falls open and he can see she's not wearing a bra underneath

" _Awww!_ CJ don't!" He smiles taking a breath. His hand now on the smooth softness of her skin. The feeling excites him "I..I can't. This is such a bad idea."

"I know..." she whispers breathlessly ".. but that's what makes it so much fun, don't you think? Oh, c'mon you want me I can feel it"

She now places his hand against her breast, and he rolls her nipple between his thumb and finger _,_ both of them now groaning with pleasure

"You know I do but... this is wrong" He closes his eyes. All he can feel is her soft flesh, but he can't look at her. He doesn't want to be tempted, but that's exactly what she's doing. Tempting him.

"Clay..." she continues teasing " we both want this. We're adults and it's not like we haven't done it before. Take a risk. I want you so much!" she kisses him again then pulls away, pushing him back but making sure he can see her breasts exposed in the opening of her shirt.

 _Oh shit!_ He gasps watching her. He can see by the look in her eyes just how turned on she

"So.. " She smiles ".. you gonna order us that cab?"

He smiles, leaning forward kissing her, pushing her back against the wall he slides her skirt up around her waist and runs his fingers on the inside edge of her lace panties.

Then tugging them hard he forces them down her legs "No, not yet!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They can't get into the motel quick enough. A tangled mix of bodies and arms. Hands trying desperately to get clothing off.

 _Oh god!_ She groans breathless.

She didn't manage to do her shirt up properly from the quick fuck they just had outside the bar but the few buttons she did re-button he now uncaringly rips open.

Kissing her all over he kicks the door shut behind them. Biting and licking over the flesh on her chest. He wants her and he can't hide his desire, as he pushes her back towards the bed.

She smiles, fumbling to undo her skirt dropping it onto the floor until she's stood in front of him completely naked. Making a deep groaning noise as he runs his hands all over her body. He pulls his tee-shirt over his head and continues to kiss her, while she grapples with the zip on his jeans.

Then he lays her back on the bed and he's on top of her _"Oh GOD! CJ! SHIT! "_ I'm not gonna be able ... _." oh God!_

She smiles "Hey, slowdown. Clay look at me..." She smiles again as he pushes deeper inside her, her thrusting her hips forward as he slams forcefully against her body. "Slow down! There's plenty of time" she leans her head back against the headboard. Her breaths coming quicker and deeper each time he thrusts his hard cock inside her.

 _Shit!...oh God!_ She groans, gripping at the bed sheets as a wave after wave of adrenaline flood her body _Ohhh!_ She screams, unable to hide her the pleasure he's giving her. As Clay looks up his hand rubbing between then on the small nub of her clit he can feel her hips buck and her legs shake as she reaches the peak of her orgasm.

As she does he grinds one more deep thrust inside filling her with his warm hot cum. She grins letting out last long breath as her body relaxes against the pillows.

 _Oh Shit! "Oh god!_ She sighs exhausted _"_ You know I haven't felt like that in... well I don't know how long"

As they kiss, him brushing her hair away from her face, she steadies herself and looks him deep in the eyes _Mmmm!_ "See that had to be worth the risk?"

"Yeah.." he nods, smiling as he lays back in the pillows, making himself comfortable ".. maybe. Come here" he pulls her on to him and kisses her.

She looks up, biting her lip in the sexy way she does, laying on his chest drawing circles with her fingers on his skin. "I need a shower" she sighs "Do you wanna order pizza, and some beers?"

"Really?" He frowns checking the time on his watch. "It's three am, you want beers and pizza now?"

"Three am? Shit! " She leans around the bathroom doorway frowning at him "I didn't realize it was that late. You know what, come join me shower instead"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

 **07:00hrs**

 _Mmmm!_ Clay groans as he turns over and smiles at her "Morning!"

She sleepily comes around and smiles back "Hey sexy!"

"You okay?"

 _Mm mm_ I'm good. You?"

He nods as she lays against his chest, his arm wrapped around her back. The guilt of what they've done is starting to fill his head "You know we shouldn't have done this"

"Really?" she frowns "What you're complaining ? Cos you know, I didn't hear any complaints last night"

"CJ you know why"

"Oh Clay..." he takes a deep breath "don't spoil it" She kisses him gently "It was sex. Great sex. That's all. we don't have to complicate it"

"I need to get dressed. I need to speak to Sonny"

"Sure!" She nods "Just a few more minutes first." she smiles, laying her head back against his chest, listening to the booming sound of his heart beating "Did I hear right, that you're living with Sonny now?"

"Yeah...yeah. After everything that happened, I didn't wanna be on my own and so he said I could stay. Guess I just haven't made the decision to move out" he frowns "You do know, he's been beside himself with worry, about what he did"

 _Shhh! "_ I don't wanna talk about that anymore"

"CJ why _did_ you come back?" He sits up, looking her deep in the eyes.

"I have meeting and ... well some family stuff to take care of" she kisses him " and I wanna talk to Jason. About seeing Jaycee" she sighs as he frowns at her "Clay, I need to see him. There's no reason for him not to know about me now. Jason could just tell him I've been away or...or something. I mean, he's used to Jason being away, it would be no different, would it"

She lays silent watching him. She can see he's lost deep in his thoughts and she frowns "Do you get to see him? I mean after everything, does Jason let you spend time with him"

"Yeah... yeah sometimes. Sometimes, like when Mikey's got hockey then I'll have him for the afternoon. Like this Thursday, Mikey has a match and so I'm gonna take him to the park, get something to eat. Well as long as we don't get spun up"

"Sounds good!" She nods smiling " I'm glad that he hasn't cut you out. Jaycee loved you, all I want him is for him to have people who care about him. But I just want some time with him. I don't want to cut Jason out"

"Yeah, but CJ you know why he's done that. It's to protect him. I mean... well it's been a bit of a mess"

"Yeah I know but.. " she sits up "...imagine if you found out your mom wasn't dead, that it was just something Ash told you. How would you feel? In years to come when you could have had time with her."

For the first time Clay can see she's genuinely upset as tears roll down her cheek. She sniffs them into the back of her throat _Shit!_ "I'm sorry, it's not your problem. This is my fault"

"Hey c'mon, don't cry" he wipes her cheek "It's not stupid, he's your son. I can't imagine if I had a child and couldn't see him"

"I know. Clay it's so hard. I can't even see him, let alone hold him. He's growing up without me." She leans her head against Clay's shoulder "Oh god Clay! I don't think I can do this. Go on without being able to see him. " she sigh hesitating "Can I tell you something, but you need to keep it between us"

"Um... yeah I guess!" he nods apprehensively

"I've got lawyer, and he thinks I have a case, to um..." she scratches her head "to arrange residency, if not permanently then at least proper access. But... of course I just want to talk to Jason first. I don't want it to get messy. But I have to go for it. Clay, do you understand that?"

"Shit! Really?" he frowns worried

"What else can I do? Jason won't even talk to me, let alone let me see him"

"Yeah but a lawyer! Does it need to go that far? I tell ya Jason's not gonna be happy about that"

"The lawyer says with Jason's lifestyle ...well it's not settled for a child. Single dad, Navy Seal getting called away at a moment's notice... I mean .." She shrugs

"Hey hang on, CJ! ... WOW! You can't say that! Jason's been doing a great job and he's got lots of help. To say he can't cope..." Clay frowns he's not sure what to say

She wipes another tear from her cheek "Well, it doesn't have to go that way. Not if Jason would just talk to me! You know I've just been thinking that maybe... maybe you could talk to him for me? Try and make him see sense?" she smiles at him watching as he thinks over what she's saying "Look at me Clay, I'm a mess. This is what it's doing to me"

She sighs laying quietly for a moment, her hand stroking gently over his chest and stomach "I also thought that maybe... maybe Thursday while I'm here ... you would let me see him? You know when you take him to the park. I mean it only has to be 5 minutes, and I won't tell anyone. What do you say? Please!" She leans in, placing her hand on his cheek and kisses him

"No!" He now frowns "No! No CJ don't ask me that. I can't do it " he shakes his head "NO! there's No way. I mean if he found out. I'm saying, no! So please don't ask me that again."

"Okay!" she nods "Okay forget it, you're right" she smiles frowning because she knows he's going to take a lot more persuading

He looks at his phone they've been laid there in silence for a while now "I need to go soon"

"Yeah me too .." she nods " I've got some family stuff to take care of but um... there's no hurry!" she smiles as she slowly slides down under the sheet "Is there?"

Oh God! CJ! He closes his eyes and leans his head back. His mind lost as he can feel the softness of her mouth wrapped around him _Shit! Why do I let her get to me like this?_

She lays back and takes a final deep breath and smiles

"Oh god! Seriously Clay you are so good at that!" she smiles as she runs her hand through his hair while she lays on his chest. He's fingers gently caressing over her stomach. His finger smoothing over the raised line of her scar. It's still clearly visible on the softness tautness of her skin

It's her phone ringing that now disturbs their peace "I need to get dressed. I need to meet my brother. Then. I've got some stuff with him to take care of" she smiles "You fancy dinner later?"

"NO! No, I can't" he frowns

She nods "Hey! no regrets about this are there? What we did, you know it's not wrong, and dinner would just be _dinner_. I won't seduce you again" she smiles

"Is that what you did, seduced me?" he frowns " Cos when you say it like that it sounds like you planned it?"

"Maybe" She shrugs "Maybe I did, plan it. Does it matter?" He frowns as she smiles "What? You didn't enjoy it?"

"I'm not saying that. I just think maybe... we should just leave it here!" he brushes her hair back "I'm sorry, it's gonna get too complicated you know that. With you, Jason...Jaycee. I just don't wanna get caught up in it again. Let's put it down to a drunken mistake "

"Hey, don't worry it's fine. No hassle from me. Look I'm going back to Washington in few days anyway.. once everything's taken care of here"

"Oh Shit!" he looks at his phone " I need to go! People are looking for me"

"Okay" she leans in and kisses him "We had fun though, right?"

"Yeah! Yeah we did!" he smiles as he holds her cheek looking in her big blue eyes "look I'm gonna take a shower"

While Clay's in the shower she searches his pockets and slips his apartment keys out and puts them in her bag. She smiles "Hey Clay! You want me to join you?"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Sonny are you in?" Clay bangs on the apartment door "SONNY! I've lost my keys let me in!"

Sonny comes to the door in just his boxer shorts

Clay frowns "What took you so long ?" he looks him up and down" Oh! Is Lisa still here?"

 _Ummm Humm!_ Sonny frowns

"Sorry, but I seem to have mislaid my keys!"

"Where the hell you been all night?"

"Um.. I'll explain, just let me in" He pushes past and sits down

"What is it Clay?" Sonny frowns as Lisa comes to the doorway

"She's um ...she's okay!" he bites his lip

"Who? Who's okay? CJ?...OH! Oh, thank god! I mean, how do you know?"

"I um ..." he swallows hard before his explanation "I spoke to her. She's here, in Virginia Beach for a meeting. I saw her, at the bar!"

"At the bar? What the hell was she doing there?"

"Just having a drink"

"Oh my god! Oh god... Clay you didn' ? Please man tell me nothin' happened with you and her?"

"No!" he frowns "No way, of course not. No, we just talked" he coughs hoping Sonny buys into his lie

Sonny stares at him hard "So where the hell did she go? I mean after the woods .. why didn't she get in contact?"

"She went back to Washington. Said she needed to sort out who ever came after her"

"And did she? Sort it?..."

"I don't know I didn't wanna get involved in that "

"So where is she now?"

Clay swallows nervously "Um... she's says she had some business and then she's going back to Washington. Hopefully that will be the last we see of her. But you don't need to worry now, and we don't need to tell Jason" he looks at Lisa then back to Sonny and smiles awkwardly

"Guess we better let Ray know!"

"Yeah I'll call him now."

Sonny frowns " You know Lisa, somethin just don't feel right with this!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She knocks on the hotel door "Daniel! Are you back?" She listens and tries the door handle but its locked " DANIEL!"

She knocks again and eventually he answers the door only wrapped in a towel "What?"

"What are you doing?" she frowns "It's gone eleven. You can't be still sleeping"

"CJ do you really need to know what I'm doing?" She smiles and tries to look around over his shoulder and into the room. He pulls the door towards him so she can't see anything "What do you want?"

"Have you got someone in there?" she smiles but he doesn't answer "Okay... okay" she smiles again "I um... wondered what time you wanted to visit the grave? But if you're busy we can leave it. I just have things I need to take care of that's all. Shall I go freshen up or what?"

"Freshen up? Why? Where have _you_ been"

"Just out. Catching up with an old friend " she smiles "Don't worry about me! So...how long do you need to...to finish off?" she bites her lip laughing

He looks back into the room and smiles. Then looking at his watch "Give me an hour!"

"An hour?! Impressive! Okay well say hello to your friend from me."

She turns to go, and as he starts to shut the door she puts her hand on it stopping him  
"Oh, I meant to ask. Did you have any luck yet finding out who burned my operation?"

"Um ..." he swallows nervously "no! No not yet. I'm still working on it"

"Okay, well keeping working on it. It's important that I know!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Their driver pulls up by the grave and they go and pay their respects. As they stand after laying their flowers they take a minute. She looks at him watching his face

"Daniel!" she sighs "I'm so sorry"

"Sorry?" he frowns confused "Sorry for what?"

"I'm sorry for everything that I put you through. But please, you have to understand it has to be this way. There was no choice. It was you or me and...well as you're the one betrayed me. It had to be you! "

"Sorry what?" He frowns the lines on his forehead furrow deeper "Betrayed you? I don't understand. Catherine, what's going on?"

He then looks up over towards their care. Next to it is a black SUV, the side door open. "Catherine I think we need to get out of here!" he grabs her arm, but she pulls away not alarmed in anyway

"No, no _we_ don't. Like I said, I'm sorry"

"Catherine, whats going on?"

"Daniel tell me something..." She closes her eyes to think for a moment and takes a deep breath "who's your new friend? The one at the hotel"

"What? I told you, you won't know her" he shifts nervously from foot to foot

"Daniel I'm gonna ask you one more time. _Who_ is your friend?"

He doesn't answer straight away still frowning at her "Why do you need to know that? She's no one"

"Okay" she shrugs "Don't say I didn't give you a chance!" She looks at her phone and sends a text. The two guys by the SUV start to walk over

"Catherine tell me what's going on?"

"I asked you but still you don't tell me the truth! Is this your new friend?" she turns her phone around holding up a picture of Daniel at table eating with Mandy Ellis

"Catherine, please... I can explain!"

"Oh please, I'm listening!"

"I ... I like her!" He shrugs "We got to know each other the last time I came down for you with .." he gulps nervously "...with the target package you sent" he continues to frown " I'm sorry but that's why I couldn't let you have her killed. I just really like her. In fact, I think... I think I might be in love with her"

"Love?!" she laughs loudly "You...love? You think you love Mandy Ellis. You can't be serious. She's in love with Jason!" she continues to laugh

"No, she's not in love with Jason, she knows that won't work out. She told me, he... he won't let go of the past he's not ready on. She's just his friend. There is nothing between them you have to believe that"

"Friend?.." she looks away from him "So was it you, who sent BRAVO after her?"

He sighs, hesitating, looking as the two large guys start to walk towards him "Yes! Well no, no I didn't know they'd send them, But I did pass the intel on, I did put a stop it . Catherine you weren't thinking straight . I couldn't let you just... not that!" he frowns as he sees the anger in her eyes "Catherine you were drinking, you were a mess ... you still need help"

"Help?" she frowns. Taking a breath, she holds back on unleashing her anger "Like the help you gave me before? The help that cost me my children. Yeah well. it's you that's going to need help now!" she's so angry, he can tell by the tone of her voice "I warned you Daniel what would happen when I found out who crossed me"

The two guys are there, and they get hold of Daniel "CJ what the hell are you doing?"

Her phone rings and she answers it "No!...No, he won't tell me ... I told you he definitely knows where the shipment is. No, you'll have to make him talk" the call ends abruptly, and she puts her phone back in her pocket. She doesn't look at him as they drag him away.

"CATHERINE... please! Don't do this!"

"It's best if you just tell them were the shipment is and who has it?"

"Shipment?" he frowns confused "Wait! What shipment? Shipment of what? I have no idea what you're talking about! Catherine!"

"Daniel.." she smiles " just tell them and then they won't need to hurt you. The arms shipment you got me to sign off on. It didn't arrive where it was supposed to, they want to know where it is"

"Please.. I have no idea what you're talking about" he looks at the two guys that have hold of him "STOP! Stop! I don't know what she's talking about. She deals with all that stuff; I have nothing to do with it! Please... you need to believe me"

They ignore him completely and continue to drag him towards the waiting SUV.

"Catherine you're my sister! You said family!... Catherine!"

"Yeah well family, they don't cross each other." she follows behind him, striding towards her . Before she gets in she looks at him "You shouldn't have taken my children away" Saying nothing else she gets in the car, slamming the door shut she drives away.

 _"CATHERINE!"_

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay can't sleep and he checks the time on clock several times.

The night before, being with CJ, is playing over and over in his mind. He can't help how he feels. The guilt about what they did. _Oh god! If anyone finds out!_ He's sweating and he can feel his heart racing.

He turns over again and closes his eyes. This time hoping that he might fall asleep and forget for a moment. Suddenly he can feel the soft touch of her lips on his.

He opens his eyes with a sudden jolt. _Oh my god this must be a dream? God, how can it feel so real?_

 _Shhh_! "Clay, quiet. You don't wanna wake Sonny" She puts her finger to his lips and then kisses him again


	59. Chapter 59

**Chapter 59 : don't blame him Okay**

He sits up with a jolt putting the side light on "C.J!... What the hell are you doing here? And how the hell did you get in?"

 _Shhh!_ She kisses him again and smiles "Clay, relax! Just like you, I'm trained to get into locked rooms" She holds his keys up, laughing "But really I just borrowed your keys"

"What the hell? CJ, you can't be here!" Clay panics looking at the bedroom door " You know Sonny's just in the other room"

"I know, but he's sleeping. I could hear him snoring. Hey..." she smiles " just relax. It's gonna be fine" She's already taken her jeans off and leaving them on the floor she straddles her legs either side of his body. Then leaning forward over him, her lips touch his and they kiss

"CJ… this is …"

"This is what?" she smiles "Fun, dangerous, exciting? " she kisses him again "I said relax, take a risk. You never know you might enjoy it. Don't risks turn you on anymore?"

"No! No, you have to go!" he pushes against her, holding her back. Shit! "C.J this is so wrong! More wrong than the other night.. which by the way…. was so wrong!"

"Really?" She laughs " This …is wrong?" she frowns her hand findings way under the sheet, finding the growing hard between his legs and rubbing it " How wrong?" She leans back and watching him for few moments she then lifts her tee shirt, pulling it up over head, taking it off. She's now sat straddled across his body wearing only her bra and panties. Placing her hand back against his groin, gently massaging him. "So, this really doesn't turn you on?" She continues to smile "Because it feels like you're lying. You still want me to go?"

Oh god!" he sighs, closing his eyes taking a deep breath. Watching as she continues to touch him "CJ…you …should go!"

"Yeah, you're right I _should_ …. but is that what you want? You want me to go?" she keeps smiling watching until his hard on grows and eventually he smiles in reply. Sitting up he kisses her, pulling her down onto the bed. She laughs letting out a quiet squeal of excitement

Shhh! He frowns "For god sake keep the noise down. I told you, Sonny's just through there … seriously he can't know you're here"

"You worry too much" she laughs, pulling at his neck to kiss "Hey, come here"

He smiles now working her panties down her legs, taking them off. Ahhh! She groans, taking a sharp intake of breath as he pushes the hard of his cock against her "Mmmm! I thought you said I wasn't turning you on?"

"CJ…." He smiles "do you ever shut up?" He now covers her mouth with his, then pushes himself deep inside her.

 _Aahhhhh!_ She gasps _Mmmm!_ "Only…. when you give me what I want! Now shut up and kiss me again!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The morning light comes through the break in the light cotton curtain covering the window. Clay's already awake, laying there watching as she still sleeps. He looks up, surprised by the knock on the bedroom door.

"Clay… Clay you awake?" Sonny listens at the door "Hey man … you got someone in there?"

 _SHIT!_ _"Um._ _."_ he coughs "Sonny don't come in, I'm busy!"

"Sure thing!" Sonny laughs and turns heading away from the door "Way to go there blondie. Just letting ya know that there's coffee in the pot if you or, your _friend,_ want some"

 _Mmmm!_ "Good morning!" CJ smiles, stroking her hand over Clay's naked body "You know coffee would be great!"

 _Shhh!_ " CJ keep it down. Seriously he can't know you're here. Oh man…" he sighs "what the _fuck_ am I doing?" he starts to panic. Frowning he runs his hand through his hair "This is stupid… and dangerous. CJ, we shouldn't be doing this. This is the most stupid thing, you being here!"

"Yeah, you told me that last night" she smiles "Hey, c'mon don't worry. So, you gonna get my coffee or do I have to go get my own?" she smiles and then pressing her lips on his she kisses him.

He sighs. Taking a deep breath and shaking his head, stroking her hair away from her face "I can't believe I'm stupid enough to be doing this. I should have sent you away last night" he gets up, grabbing his shorts from the floor, he pulls them on "I'll get the coffees but just stay quiet "

"Okay.." She bites her lip "I'll be as quiet as a mouse!" she smiles " _OH!...OH GOD CLAY! …. You're so GOOD! Uh!"_ she shouts out with a loud laugh, much to Clay's horror.

He leaps on the bed, putting his hand across her mouth to silence her "Oh my god! What the _hell_ are you doing?"

"Having some fun!" she laughs

"Just be quiet, please!" he rubs his head nervously "CJ, what the hell are you trying to do to me?"

"Hey…" She smiles "just chill out Go get the coffee!"

He leaves the bedroom making sure he closes the door.

While he pours two coffees Sonny watches him, smiling. "Sounds a bit of a handful…" He points to the bedroom door " that one!"

"Yeah…." Clay hesitates " yeah, she sure is!" he smiles, rolling his eyes.

"So, who is she, I mean, where'd you meet her?"

"Oh….it's just that girl from the bar. Look Sonny, if you don't mind can we have a bit of privacy for a while?"

"Hey sure man, I'll um…get out of here. Go to Lisa's, have some fun of my own" he winks, patting Clay on the shoulder. "So, is she fit then, this girl?"

Clay picks up the coffees, taking it to the bedroom. CJ's laid on top of the bed. She's still naked, with her head resting on her hand.

"So, am I.. fit?" she smiles

"I'm not answering that! You.. have a big enough ego as it is" he laughs

She smiles as he places the coffee cups on the side table by the bed.

"Come here!" she beckons him over, pulling at his neck forcing her lips onto his "Forget the coffee… I have something better to wake you up!" As he lays next to her she straddles her legs over his body, kissing him "Close your eyes and put your hands above your head!"

"What?" he frowns

"Clay, c'mon play, I've got a surprise" she smiles teasingly

"No! No, I'm not gonna do that"

"Oh, go on, it's fun!"

"Okay…" he smiles knowing he probably regret it, but he can't resist the temptation "..what the hell are you up to?"

"You'll see. Now, close your eyes!"

Then before he can say anything she reaches behind her back taking a cable tie she quickly has his hands bound to the headboard.

 _SHIT!_ He pulls at them "CJ…what the hell are you doing? Are you crazy?...Let me go!"

Shhh! She places her finger against his lips "Sonny will hear you." she smiles "But no, no I can't let you go, well not yet!" Sitting over him she teases his body. Kissing over his bare chest, stroking her hands gently over his abs. Each touch makes him strain at the zip ties, trying desperately to free himself. He can't.

She has him trapped but the feeling is turning him on, and she smiles. She can feel the hardness filling his shorts and she encourages it

"CJ!... Let me go!"

"No!" she smiles "You want me to let you go, then you have to do something for me." she starts to shift her weight over him, grinding her naked body on his

"Oh Geez!" he groans. He wants to touch her so much, but he can't "C.J please, not like this I just… _Oh god!"_ he closes his eyes, the feeling of her body against his while he's restrained is so frustrating but …oh, so good!

"Do something for me and I'll let you go" she keeps smiling, and teasing.

"What? What do you want me to do?... _Oh God!"_ _he moans loudly his cock stiffening; he thrusts it forward against her. Aahhhhh! Ohhh geez!_

She stops. Sitting there now watching him shaking his head. She can see the frustrated pleasure etched on his face and she smiles.

"Let me see Jaycee, on Thursday, let me meet you at the park."

"What?! No!" he stops thinking about what she's doing to his body and frowns at her  
"NO! No way!" he looks, staring her in the eyes. Her face expressionless and serious "CJ…no! I already told you, I can't do that"

"Okay … " she shrugs "well I'm gonna take a shower and get dressed. Maybe… you wanna think about being found like this"

"What? CJ, wait! Get back here! CJ..Sonny's out there!" Clay starts to panic. Would she really leave him tied up? How the hell would he explain what she was doing here with him. "CJ please …please don't do this! You know I can't, it's impossible"

"So…" Laughing, she picks up her cell phone "who do you want me to call, to come get you? Sonny… too easy, Ray? Oh...maybe I'll call Jason?" She leans forward, her breasts brushing against his bare chest as she smiles " I'm… sure you could explain to him how this happened"

"CJ stop being a bitch and let me go, I'm serious! This is not funny."

"Oh… I'm a bitch now?" she frowns "Wow! Now you've hurt my feelings and I thought you were enjoying this"

He closes his eyes as she leans back. She starts again with her hands on his body but now she's taking pictures on her phone.

"Clay, all I'm asking…" she whispers in his ear brushing her cheek on his "… is for five minutes, on Thursday. That's all I want, just five minutes to see my son"

She puts her hand down to his groin, pulling at his shorts, tugging them down and exposing the hard he's been trying to hide. Wrapping her hand gently around his length she starts to massage him.

He swallows, trying to not respond but her advances. "CJ, you know I can't! Please just stop this… this is madness"

"But you could. I mean, who would know? Clay, please I just wanna see him, is that too much to ask?"

He closes his eyes and pulling hard at the restraints on his wrists Shit! he can't think, wondering if she's really serious. Would she call Ray, or worse Jason! "CJ stop this now!"

"Sorry…" She shakes her head "I can't. I want this too much because I wanna see my son"

He closes his eyes and thinks long and hard then he relents " _Alright!_ Fine! I can't believe I'm saying this but five minutes. You don't speak to him though, you just turn up, watch and then leave. And C.J, no one can find out about this. Do you understand me? No one must know anything!" he lets out a deep and regretful sigh _Shit!_ "I can't believe I'm even agreeing to this!"

"No one will know, I promise" she places her lips on his, kissing him, forcing her tongue in his mouth "I promise, you have my word no one will know" gently she bites at his lip. Looking at him lying there, restrained and naked under her control "I'm gonna make the risk worth it" she smiles "We're gonna start now!"

She continues to smile, moving her naked weight over his skin. Her own body starting to tingle at the sensation of his skin on hers. He cheeks flushing with anticipated excitement " _Ohhhh!"_ _she groans temptingly Mmmm! Geez Clay!_ _"Ho_ _w_ good does this feel?"

 _Yeah!_ He smiles, she's right this feels _really_ good. Knowing he can't touch as she brushes her breasts over him. He thrusts his hip forward he doesn't want to hold back. He wants to fuck her again. She can see it. See how turned on he is.

"So, you agree. I can see Jaycee Thursday at the park?" she sits up again and looks him full in the face. She's made herself breathless

"Yeah!" he reluctantly nods. "Now get back here, finish this off!"

"Okay.." she smiles "Just relax"

He closes his eyes unable to believe that she's manipulated him like this but now enjoying as slides his shorts off and taking his hardness deep inside her. He groans loudly _Oh god!_ He takes a long breath inward. His body aches with desire "Oh…that is so good!"

He lays there, eyes closed and before he knows what's happening she cuts his hands lose and sits back on the bed.

Free, he smiles then in one swift movement his hands are all over her body, flipping he over on her chest, pressing her head into the pillow. He now has hold of _her_ hands, restraining her.

Mmmm! She groans then she gasps as he slides his hardness between her legs and thrusts deep inside. "Oh…Clay! Oh god!" She can only just get her words out between her breaths

She's teased him to a point that he can't hold back, so turned on. He hates what she made him agree to but he's under her spell. He knows it's dangerous and stupid. But still she's excited him.

Their coffee has gone cold. They hear the front door click shut as Sonny leaves.

Laying there on the bed, naked next to each other she gently strokes her fingers over his skin. "I'll get us another coffee" she smiles

"Let me just check it's all clear first!"

"He's gone …I heard the door" she kisses him "Clay, don't worry so much!"

She heads out wearing only his shirt. Pouring the coffee from the jug into the cups she calls to him "Do you take sugar?" Suddenly she looks up, the door behind her opens.

"I forget my damn phone" Sonny sighs looking into the kitchen his mouth drops open "Oh my fucking god! What the hell!"

" _Sonny!_ Oh..." she swallows anxiously "um… _oh shit!"_ she bites her lip and then laughs.

"CLAY! Get the _FUCK_ OUT HERE NOW!" Sonny screams towards the bedroom

Hearing his voice, he leaps from the bed. _Shit! Sonny!_

"What the _fuck_ is going on here? Oh god, I knew it! I goddam knew when you said you'd seen her, you meant you slept with her!"

She looks up at Clay and then laughs. Sonny turns on her "It's not _fuckin'_ funny! This is serious! What the _hell_ are you two playin' at?"

"Well the look on your face is funny." she puts the cup down and laughs "look um... I'm gonna get dressed, I need to go."

"Clay… just what the hell you think Jason's gonna say if he finds out about this? You gonna be in such deep shit. You'll never learn where she's concerned will ya!" _Urggghh!_ Sonny rubs his head in disbelief " Clay, you wanna risk your career… over her? You know what she's like. What the hell got inta your head?" He looks over at Clay, he's standing naked, in the doorway to his bedroom.

CJ watches Clay, he doesn't answer. But she does. She turns on Sonny "No, he's not gonna lose his career, because no one is going to say anything! There is no reason for Jason to know! I mean, after all .. there are other things you haven't told him so; you don't need to tell him this"

Sonny gets up from the chair where he sit. He's right up in her face now "You're deluded…mad, not right in the head and you're messin' with him like you always do. People will find out cos I _am_ gonna tell Jason, this needs to end!" he takes his hat off and runs his hand through his hair " I wish to god I had killed you now."

"There he is!" she smiles calmly "That _angry_ Sonny, see.. he told you it was an accident. But now you see, he's full of hatred, wishing me dead" She continues staring at Sonny as Clay watches them "You're not gonna tell Jason, you're not gonna tell anyone!" she look at him her face expressionless and serious "because if you do…. then Lisa can kiss goodbye to her new officer career, because I will tell him what you two have been up to right under his nose and trust me, that won't go down well" she sighs as they stare at each other "We understand each other? You tell Jason and … you both lose your careers and um… I don't think you've got an Admiral Daddy, to step in and save you!"

Sonny can feel his rage boiling the fact she's brought Lisa into the conversation. He can't hold it and lashing out he smacks her, hard, across the face "You little bitch!"

It hurts, a lot, and she holds her hand to her face, rubbing the bruising on her cheek "Just a little one? Oh, c'mon Sonny, you can do better than that"

"I swear to god!" he's ready to lash out at her again but Clay grabs at him, stopping him.

"Sonny…stop! CJ you stop as well. You're right this has to end" Clay rubs his head he realises how wrong what they've done is _Shit!_

CJ's silent for a moment, then speaks "Oh and also … you might wanna think about our explanation for trying to kill me! I mean that wasn't an accident, was it?"

Sonny stares at her trying to stay calm but the mores she smirks the harder it becomes. "When I get back…" he turns pointing at Clay " she better be gone!" he takes a deep breath and is in Clay's face now. He hushes the tone of his voice "What the _hell_ were you thinking Clay? Have you actually lost your mind?"

"I don't know, I really don't. Look, we'd been drinkin' and I just got caught up in the moment. But this, last night.. she stole my keys. Sonny it's the truth, I didn't know she was gonna do this. If I did I would have stopped it"

"Oh, c'mon Clay …" she laughs " I asked you if you wanted me to go, when I got here. I didn't hear you say yes! You know you could've stopped it any time, but you didn't" she sneers looking at Sonny "Oh, he's not putting this all on me, he knew what he wanted last night. He took it, and he enjoyed it. Don't worry I'm going!"

Clay looks up to Sonny "I'm sorry. She's right though, I didn't stop it, I should have. I knew the risk we were taking"

Sonny just shakes his head just as he's about to say something but as he opens his mouth their phones start bleeping. "Well…looks like you saved by the bell!

CJ smiles "Wow! I'd love to be on this spin up!"

"CJ…" Clay looks at her "shut the hell up!

"You know, I need to get dressed!"

She pulls the shirt of Clay's that she's wearing, up over her head. Taking it off she drops it on the floor just in front of Sonny. He closes his eyes, so he doesn't have to look at her naked body as she walks past him to the bedroom

"Oh, and Clay…" she smiles "be sure and call me when you get back"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

 ** 3 Days later – Thursday  **

Jason has taken Mikey to hockey practice and Clay arrives at the park with Jaycee, just as he said he would.

He did think about not going but Jason had already told the little boy that's where Clay was taking him, and he would have hated to disappoint him. Looking around the empty party he's so apprehensive. He smiles as Jaycee as he calls him to the swing.

He's hoping after the showdown at the apartment, with Sonny, that CJ won't show up. Unfortunately, he's disappointed and he sees her standing by the tree in the corner.

 _Shit!_ He swallows nervously _Damn! I seriously hoped she wouldn't be here!_

She smiles, she can tell how anxious he is "I see you kept your side of the bargain"

"CJ …" he sighs " this really is not a good idea and I want those photos of me .. the other night, gone"

"We'll see. You know…" she whispers in his ear, brushing her cheek against his "I find them quite a turn on. I was hoping we could do it again, sometime soon!"

"That …what we did, it's not happenin' again. Do you understand, I can't take that risk, of getting found out. Sonny's still fuming. He's hardly speaking to me"

 _Shhh!_ She kisses his lips "It's fine, just blame me. You know you're very good with him?" she smiles

"Who Sonny?"

"No…" she laughs "Jaycee, you're very patient. He likes you. You'd make a great Dad Clay, if um… things could have been different .. well, we'll never know will we." She smiles kissing him gently on the lips.

He sighs, thinking about when he thought Jaycee was his. How he wished it was. It feels like a lifetime ago now. "CJ can I ask you something?"

"Um... sure" she frowns watching him looking at her "What is it?"

"The baby you lost…it was mine right"

She takes a shocked breath in she wasn't actually expecting him to ask that. To go back to that history "Clay.. I can't talk about that.. there was so much going on .. things um…there's so much I wish I could tell you. I can't. I'm sorry it's better this way"

"But .. I mean after, you were okay, right?" 

"I told you Clay.." she snaps abruptly "I don't wanna talk about that!"

He stares at her "What's going on? CJ… I can see it there's something.. tell me"

"C'mon let's get him an ice cream, you want an ice cream Jaycee? " she smiles at the little boy "Do you think he knows who I am?"

"What? No…. look I told you, you can't speak to him or do anything with him. CJ, you promised you'd just watch. Five minutes you said. I need to go"

"Oh, c'mon Clay, he's not gonna know and kids love ice cream. Don't you?" she smiles, tempting him "Look, you've done the worst bit by bringing him here to meet me. So, just let me enjoy it. I might not get to do it again" Jaycee smiles and as he reaches his hand up CJ leans down to him "You want _Mommy_ to get you and ice cream?"

The little boy looks at her confused and unsure before putting his arms up to Clay to be picked up. She looks up at Clay and swallows the emotion that clumps in her throat. Truth is she wasn't prepared for him not to respond to her.

Clay smiles sympathetically, seeing the disappointment in her face as he she doesn't get the response she was hoping for "He's only little, he just gets confused" Clay feels sorry for her. He can see how desperately she wanted a connection, for her son to recognize her "Hey Jaycee.." Clay smiles at him "how about we get ice cream?"

"Yeah!" the little boy smiles clapping his hands.

Clay touches her face "C'mon on then, let's get ice cream!" he may smile but inside he's churning up with nervous. Afraid of what he's done. He knows if Jason ever finds out, then at best, he'll lose his place on BRAVO and at worst Jason will, probably, kill him.

They get an ice cream and take a stroll through the park eating them. CJ smiles as she watches them together, Clay helping her little boy with his treat, wiping his chin and cleaning him up. It's nice.

"You know Clay, I'm sorry for putting you through this but there wasn't any other way" she pauses a moment "but um.. .you don't have to mention me or tell him what went on. Just tell _him_ I gave you no choice"

"What?" he frowns confused" CJ, what the hell are you talking about? Tell who you gave me no choice?"

"Jason… tell him I gave you no choice" She scoops Jaycee up in her arms "I'm so sorry to do this"

He frowns watching as she starts to walk away with the child in her arms. It takes him a moment to register what she's doing "Hey CJ, wait! You can't just take him … what the hell!... CJ, I said wait!" he puts his hand out to stop her but just as he does two large guys appears from nowhere taking him by surprise he struggles as they drag him away.

Hearing him cry out CJ stops. She closes her eyes and a tear rolls down her cheek. Then she turns back watching what happens to him. "Don't kill him!" she cries out concerned "Just make it look convincing, like he didn't have any choice" she takes a breath _I'm so sorry Clay!_

She kisses JC on the top of the head and continues walking towards the car that is waiting on the road.

"WAIT!... CJ! What the hell? NO! Don't do this, not like this …please, talk to Jason" he struggles and fights with the guys who have hold of him, but they are strong, even for him and dragging him down behind some bushes he feels a sting in shoulder and then starts to pass out.

As he drops to the ground they start kicking, his vision blurring he manages to cover his head with his hands, but he's overpowered. His head flashes up visions of when he was taken hostage and even in his now drugged state he tries to fight back. Then he feels the pain as someone stamps hard on his fingers and he curls himself up into a ball Urggghh! Stop! He cries out. He's winded and aching before everything goes dark and he passes out .

Bloodied and bruised they leave him on the path near the lake. They take his wallet and phone, making it look like a robbery.

A passing jogger find him and calls the police.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sonny runs down the hospital corridor where Ray's already waiting "I came as soon as I heard. What the hell happened?"

"Jason's through there with the police. They think it was a robbery. But, we don't know where Jaycee is" Ray frowns "they're trying to work out if someone's took him or if .. he's just wandered away. Oh my god Sonny, I hope they find him. Jason's going out of his mind"

Sonny looks up at Ray "What did Clay say happened?"

"He didn't, he's not conscious yet!"

 _SHIT!_ "Can I see him?"

"Um .. yeah sure. Sonny, he's um… he's a bit of a mess!"

Ray looks at Jason as he re-joins them "They get anything from the CCTV?"

"There's no cameras that side of the park. They're interviewing people now!" Shit! Jason slides down the wall and sits on the floor "He's so small Ray Where the hell would he go? What if someone took him?"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Hey, how's he doin' Doc?"

The doctor smiles as looks up from his charts "Well, he's stable but he's taken a hell of a kicking. He's got a couple of broken ribs and he's not regained consciousness yet, that's what's concerning us most. He took a kick to the head. Oh, and his hand is pretty messed up"

 _"SHIT! Goddammit!..."_ Clay, c'mon man, wake up!" Sonny takes Clay's bandaged hand in his "I take back all the things I said. Just wake the hell up! She caused all that, not you. I don't blame you Please wake up Clay, we need to know where Jaycee is" Sonny rests his head on Clay's arm "Oh lord… I can't go through this again… please be alright!"

"How's he doin'?" Jason stands in the doorway watching them

"Doctors says he's good but they're worried cos he's not come round yet"

"SHIT! "Sonny, I got a bad feelin' I think someone took Jaycee. I mean a boy, that age, he don't just disappear"

"Hey Jason, hang in there… we'll find him"

"Mr Hayes, can we have a word?" The police officers stand in the corridor. Both Jason and Sonny take a deep breath, hoping the news is going to be good. "How're you holding up?"

"Yeah I'm okay, just want my son back"

"Look we know this is difficult, but we need to find out, was Mr Spencer with anyone else at the park, maybe meeting friends, other parents? Anyone, maybe a girlfriend?"

"No.. No not that I know He regularly takes him there, on a Thursday when I take my other son to hockey practice. It's just so we can have some time, one on one. Jaycee.. he gets on well with Clay. Oh my god do you think someone knew?" Jason closes his eyes "You think someone's taken him, don't you?"

"Hey, one step at a time. So, it's a routine, Clay could get to know people at the park, maybe someone he sees there, regular?"

"I don't know, I suppose. Why?"

"The woman at the ice cream stand, she thinks she recognizes Clay but … he was with a woman Any chance you know who that woman might be?"

"No!" Jason shakes his head " No idea .. I don't think Clay was seeing anyone right now. You think this woman, you think she's taken my son?"

"We're not sure. The ice cream seller, she said Mr Spenser was carrying him when they got to her stand. But …it might help to know who she is. We'll see if we can dig up some more CCTV ... Just hold in there"

"Okay and thanks"

"If you think of anything or Mr Spenser comes around, please get in touch. We've still got people out searching" he pats Jason on the arm "I'm a father myself, so I know how hard this must be, but rest assured we're doing everything we can"

He heads back to Clay's beside. He takes a long, deep breath clearing the stress from his head. Sonny looks at him searching for answers

"They got anything to go on?"

"No, no not yet" Jason lets out a long sigh

" So, what did they want, the police?"

"They um…..they wondered if Clay might have been with a girlfriend. A woman at the ice cream stand, she thought Clay was with a woman, but he never said anything about seeing anyone, did he to you?"

 _Shit!_ Sonny closes his eyes " _Oh Jesus!_ Why the hell didn't I think! _Fuck!_ ...It's CJ!"

"What?" Jason frowns watching him "Did you say CJ? What the hell's she got to do with this? Sonny…talk to me!"

"Jason… "Sonny rubs his face " I'm sorry, it just.., it didn't cross my mind. I think CJ might have took him."

"What the hell are you talking about? Why would CJ take him, I thought she went back to Washington?"

"Look … _oh god!_ …It's a long story, so just don't flip out alright. Clay he.. he was stoopid. She messes with his head. Oh hell, you know what she's like " Sonny closes his eyes trying to explain "Why the hell couldn't he stay away from her!"

"SONNY what the hell are you talking about, look if you know something you better tell me right now!"

 _"SHIT! Goddammit"_ Sonny lashes out at the door "Clay, he's… he's been seein her. CJ they've been seeing each other. She's here in Virginia Beach, he slept with her, the night before we got spun up!"

"What the hell?" Jason frowns

"It's too much of a coincidence Jason, her being here. This happenin' Look, just stay calm alright, the one good thing, if it's her that's got him, then she's not gonna hurt him" he pulls his hands through his hair, staring at Clay "He knows it was stupid, I goddamn balled his ass out for it already, but I'll bet she was the woman at the park!"

"Where the hell is she?"

" I don't know … she was …" he closes his eyes he can't believe he's going to have to tell him this "she was at my apartment the last time I saw her. He said she stole his keys and let herself in… Jason this is not his fault. You know her, what she's like… just don't blame him, okay!"

"I need to know where the _hell_ she is! Sonny, we have to find her! She's not getting away with this, she can't just snatch him whenever the hell she feels like it "

"Yeah I know, and we will. We'll find her" he turns around, hearing Clay moan " Clay ! Clay you awake little buddy?"

 _Mmmm!_ "Where am I?"

"Hospital. Look, do you remember what happened?"

He shakes his head he's groggy from all the drugs "CJ …where is she?"

"Yeah, that's what we wanna know? Clay what happened? Did she take him?""

"CLAY?...Clay…. stay awake, man" Jason's standing over his bed, staring at him. "Clay, did she take Jaycee? CLAY… _goddammit,_ speak to me did. Did CJ take Jaycee?"

Clay shake nods his head. He's in pain and he groans. Then closing his eyes Clay loses consciousness again.

 _"CLAY!_ ….CLAY! _Wake up!_ … I need to know where she is!" _Fuck!_ Jason's angry, he lashes out, thumping the trolley beside the bed with his fist. "God dammit Sonny, where the _hell_ is my son!"


	60. Chapter 60

_**So thought I would tie it all up to end with the Season 2 finale! One final Chapter to a nice round number of 60 chapters that started as only 6 chapter buzzing round in my head**_  
 _ ***how did that happened went on and on like a TV series :) ***_  
 _ **word of advice think of a plot before you start makes it easier than making it up as you go along! :)**_ _**guess i need to think of a new plot now if I want to continue writing eek!**_  
 _ **bit sad to say goodbye to her now :( #theEndEnd**_

 **Chapter 60: It wasn't supposed to end like this**

She's sat on the floor in the hotel room with her hands on her head and her eyes closed trying to shut out the sound of the crying.  
"Oh, please stop! Come on for Mommy … just please stop crying!"

Jaycee's been crying since she brought him back and keeps asking for his Daddy

"Daddy's not here ….it's just Mommy .. Jaycee please!"

She picks him and walks him round the room trying to distract him  
"come on please… just stop … just go to sleep!" she tries showing him things out the window but he isn't distracted by anything

"Daddy!...I want see Daddy!"

 _"Oh god!"_  
She closes her eyes as she puts him down on the floor again but the crying starts all over again  
"oh please stop!" she sits on the bed and lets out a long sigh

As she leans her head back on the pillow she catches sight of the glass of whiskey she poured but didn't drink when they got back.

She rubs her head with both hands and stands over the glass trying to sniff in the smell. She promised herself she wouldn't drink around JC but she's struggling to stick with it, especially with all the crying.

"PLEASE! Just SHUT UP!" she snaps at him and immediately feels bad trying to take it back  
"Sorry!"  
she picks him up "Mommy's sorry .. but please ..just stop crying"

The crying is really stressing her now. She just wasn't expecting it. She never remembers him crying like this when he was a baby

 _"SHIT!"_ her head is pounding " _fuck it!"_ she knocks the large whiskey back  
"Kahhh!" She chokes "ahhh!... Shit!" it burns the back of her throat

she looks at her hands which are shaking. "Geez!"  
she starts crying herself as she looks down at the child whose sat on the floor red with tears.

"Jaycee come on please baby.. shhhh! .. Hey ...how about we get you some food? You hungry?"  
she bends down and looks at him "What do you want?"

"Daddy!" He puts his arms up and cries again "Daddy"

 _"Oh Shit!"_ … "look!... I told you daddy's not here!"

"Shit! Please Just stop!"  
she pours another large drink and gathers herself. This is not how it was supposed to be this is not what she planned.

She thinks about what she's going to do and nervously picks up her phone.  
Biting her lip, she closes her eyes as she makes the call

"Yeah it's Catherine… look there's been a mistake …..  
Yeah I know…...No no ones messing you around…..look I need my brother back  
No!...No he doesn't know where that shipment is … but I do now! …..yes I understand…..I'll send you the location  
just…just let him go …...No! I know …... there was a mistake he didn't have the information like I thought.. …..I found out who did  
I'll text it now…...Yeah yeah! I understand …Yes I know… look I'm sorry.  
As a favor to me…...yes I'll make sure you're compensated …... Just tell me where to pick him up"

"Shit! that's gonna cost me!"  
she pours another drink and knocks that back in one. She looks around the room trying to keep herself together  
"Oh god Daniel why aren't you here... I need you .. I can't do this on my own!"

Her thoughts are disturbed by a loud knock on the door. She looks up surprised then at her watch  
"SHIT!" she frowns and takes a deep breath in "Who is it?"

"It's errrmm... Marc Brennan. We spoke on the phone. We have a meeting about your custody application?"

"Oh yeah!… Yeah...errrm just a minute…sorry.. I'll be right there. Just give me a minute!" she drinks the rest of the drink and quickly tidies round.

He waits outside the door for her to answer but is taken by surprise when another visitor arrives behind him

"Hi" Matt frowns "You are?"

"Oh errrm…. Marc Brennan attorney for Ms Lewis" he puts his hand out to shake Matt's outstretched hand "and you?"

"Matt Fisher … Ms Lewis's ermmmm…."  
Matt thinks for a moment how to describe himself what he is to her "…psychiatrist!".

"Oh, okay! You're here for the meeting as well?"

"Errmm …. meeting? Yeah! Yeah of course!" Matt frowns he has no idea what's going on

CJ opens the hotel door to find them both waiting there  
" Marc.. come in …" she stops as she sees Matt standing there as well "Matt?! What the hell are you doing here?"

"I just came to check on you ..errrmm… Daniel called me a few days back said he thought you could do with someone to talk to? But I haven't been able to get hold of him since so I errmm… I got a flight ...just to check you're alright..I see you have company?" he frowns

"Errmm .. yeah! Look you errrmm... better both come in!"

Both men walk into the suite and see Jaycee crying on the floor.

Matt looks confused "Catherine?" he frowns "What's going on? Is that Jaycee?.. what's he doing here?"

"errrmm… Don't ask .."  
she looks at the frown on his face "look… I just needed to see him!"

"Catherine" he bites his lip and the worried expression deepens "please tell me Jason knows you've got him? that Jason did agree to this?"

She pauses her lip quivers she can't hold herself together as bites her lip hard "well ..errrmm... not exactly"

"Shit ! … and where's Daniel? Daniel does know you've got him?"

She shakes her head "No!...He's errmmm… been tied up with some business! He'll be back later today"

"So how come Jaycee is here with you?"

She bits her lip and hovers near the drink on the side  
"I ermmm... kinda took him" She turns and looks at Matt "oh don't look at me like that…it was a spur of moment thing….I just needed to be with him"

Matt closes his eyes unable to comprehend what she's done  
"SHIT Catherine! …You have to let Jason know he's here?"

She shakes her head "No! I can't!"

"Catherine?… he'll be going out of his mind with worry!"

"I can't .. I can't tell him… you don't understand it's..." she pauses thinking about Clay "...it's gone too far for that. I can't just tell him!"

Marc who's been quiet up to this point frowns and looks at Matt "Sorry I don't understand …this…this is the child she want's custody of? Yes? but I was on the understanding the Father wouldn't consent to any visitation? Has he since changed his mind?"

"No he hasn't changed his mind!...it would appear she's taken matters into her own hands"

Marc frowns "do I understand this correctly… you've taken him from his father's care without consent?"

"errmm...No! .. wellsort of" she gulps as she wipes the tears that are running down her cheek "he was with a friend .. a friend of his fathers.. I know the friend and I errmmm…. took him from him"

Marc frowns more  
"look my advice as your lawyer is... it that you need to take him back right now…something like this is not going to help your case. Snatching a child is a serious offense… even as his mother.. if you don't have official authorisation… he could call the police!"

She shakes her head "that's what I'm paying you for .. to fix this …can't you see this …..this is why I _need_ to make this official .. so, I don't' have to feel like this … I don't have to resort to doing this!"

Matt picks Jaycee up and he stops crying.  
She lets out a long deep breath "phewwww!...at last!" the respite from the crying is just what she needs. "he hasn't stopped since we got back!"

"Catherine we have to take him back to Jason!"

"NO!" she frowns at the suggestion "Matt No!... Jason will never let me see him again after this! We can't!... he has to fix this first"

"Catherine.. you're not thinking straight…."  
He looks at the bottle of JD wondering how much she might have drank "Look we argue your case properly… tell him this was just an emotional moment you weren't thinking straight...you were under a lot of pressure You saw him with the friend and just didn't' think but you're sorry"

"You don't understand .. it's not a simple as that. I didn't just take him ….. Oh it doesn't matter but we can't take him back!"

"Catherine we _have t_ o take him back"  
Matt puts his hand on her cheek "you know we do… you can't keep him... not like this"

She sits on the floor rubbing her head. Her hands won't stop shaking and she wants another drink so much

"Matt, he doesn't even know who I am!...he won't stop crying .. just keeps wanting his Daddy!"  
she takes deep breathes " Jason's already cut me out of his life!... this is not how I wanted it. My own son doesn't know who I am…do you know what that feels like?"

"Hey, come on … look we'll sort this okay… Marc.. he's gonna sort an arrangement" he looks at Marc "yes?"

Marc cautiously nods in agreement  
"this will of course make things slightly more difficult, so the sooner we get him back … the more we can fix the damage this does to your appeal"

She shakes her head"NO!.. didn't you hear me?...I'm not taking him back!"  
She frowns trying to think what to do "So what happens if I just keep him? Take him back to Washington. What can Jason do?"

"If Mr Hayes goes to the court they can force you to give him back. If it's proved you took him without consent… you may not get any right to see him at all. The best you might hope is a supervised visit"

"SHIT!"  
she closes her eyes trying to decide what to do "I must have some rights. For god sake .. I'm his mother!"

"It's okay!" Matt sits Jaycee on the bed and sits beside her on the floor  
"Catherine we can sort this but we must take him back ...look we'll come with you and try to make Jason discuss an arrangement. Yeah?.. Look go get cleaned up and we'll take him back now"

While she heads into the bathroom Matt looks at Marc "What's her chances of getting custody?"

Marc frowns and shakes his head "given these circumstances" he sighs "it's not likely she'll get full custody but.. we can seek a more permanent visitation right!" He picks the JD bottle up and looks at Matt "is she still drinking? I was informed that was a past problem but in control?"

"errmm No!…she has the occasional one but she is in control of it! .. probably just been the stress of today.. help her unwind you know! It's been hard… not seeing her son but he's the most important thing, she won't jeopardize that"

"Okay! well as long as she is! That will be the one thing they will throw at us in court"

She comes out of the bathroom

"You okay now?" Matt frowns

"Yeah… I'm good"

"alright you ready to do this?"

"No not really but if you say I've got no choice?... look errrm …. You go down to the car. Take him with you. I just have to find my phone and some things"

"Okay!" Matt carries Jaycee "come on little man we go see you Daddy yeah?!"

She watches as they close the door then she goes back and pours a nearly full glass of JD. She glugs it back as fast as she can get it down.  
Trying to numb all her feelings out

"bleurgh!" she gags as it runs down her chin.  
The amount she swallows nearly makes her throw up "bleurgh!" she reaches. She puts her hand over her mouth and closes her eyes as she stands there fro a moment trying to hold it down and not throw it back up  
"Fuck!" she's panicking She can feel the sweat on her forehead. Shes not sure she can keep it down _"Ohhhh! SHIT! Catherine calm down"_ she takes deep breathes "damn you Jason!"

She knows he's going to be fuming and what about Clay? how the hell's she going to explain that? She pours another drink but all she can do is look at it and now actually drink it. The speed she drank the one before is still making her feel sick.

She stands there contemplating her options and what she's going to say to Jason. How she's going to explain things. She's watching herself in the mirror and taking a long hard deep breath she finds all her inner strength and wipes her face  
"Phewww! you can do this"  
All the emotion drops from her face and she puts on her steely hard shell as she keeps taking long deep calming breaths then she downs the rest of the drink.  
"Right time to be the bitch they think you are and do this!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason comes to the door the moment their vehicle pulls up outside. He's been watching at the window for… well he doesn't know how long but nearly permanently since he got back from the hospital.  
He comes out out to meet them as they open the car doors

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU WERE DOING?" he's fuming and his rage is about about to boil over as he meets them on the driveway.

Matt's carrying Jaycee  
"Daddy!" Jaycee calls out and stretches his arms out.  
It's the only thing that stops him lashing about at CJ as she gets out of the back of the car

"Give him here!" he snaps

CJ stands herself between him and Matt  
"NO! I don't think so…. first you're gonna listen to me or you're not getting him back"

This makes him fume even more and it takes all his will power not to hit her right there in the driveway. He grinds his teeth hardly able to hold himself back as he grabs her arm hard and pulls her to one side.

He's right up close in her face  
"now _you_ listen you stupid bitch… that's _MY_ son and you have _NO_ right to do what you did…. I've been going out of my mind with worry!… And what the hell did you have done to Clay?"

Matt frowns "Clay?..What about Clay? Catherine what's he talking about? What's Clay got to do with this?"

Jason laughs "Oh didn't she tell you what she did? No..that'd be about right…you're not very good at your job are you .. thought that's what people like her have people like you for so they don't do things like this?"  
Jason's having a really hard time keeping his temper in control andhe squeezes her arm harder  
"You're sick!... you need help or locking up! …..Now you give my son back!"

Jason goes to take him, but C.J pushes him away again  
"I told _you_ NO!.. Not until you listen to me!"

Now he can't contain his anger, she's pushed him too far and he lashes out hitting her in the face knocking her over. She sits on the floor holding her nose. She knows she deserves it but doesn't mean she's going to take it

She gets and is in his face .. she's breathing deep trying to hold her temper as well  
"You do that again and I'll make sure you never see him ever again!" she turns to Marc "that must be grounds for my case? You saw that .. you saw how he is how he treats me! How is he fit to look after my son?"

"and who the hell is this guy?"

She smiles "He's my Lawyer!… I'm going after _full_ custody of Jaycee … I'm gonna say you're not fit to look after him. and what you just did…. " she gathers control of herself "well that helps my case!"

" and what you're saying you're fit to look after him ?" Jason laughs "Geez! What someone who can't even be sober for a day?"

"Can he just talk to me like that?"

"Mr Hayes… I would watch your accusations. My client admits she has had issues in the past but she has assured me after treatment they are all under control!"

Jason walks up to him looking at his, what he assumes is an expensive suit. He brushes his shoulder feeling the quality of the material.

Marc swallows hard. Jason is very imposing standing in front of him in an intimidating way  
" I don't know how much she's paying you pal but you wanna get to know her a bit more first … she's a liar… who manipulates thing to get what she wants and she's already been drinking today…. If you really knew her you'd be able to tell!"

"I accept she's had a stressful day, but I am assured that everything is under control"

Jason turns and looks at her, he smiles "you paying his bill in the bedroom?"

"How dare you!" She's fuming and hurt that Jason would say that and slaps him hard across the cheek.

He laughs "Yeah I thought so!"

she shakes her head "Jesus Jason…. Why do you have to be like this?"

He laughs again "so what you're saying you can be sober enough to look after him?... fine then prove it… get tested"

She frowns "What?" she laughs "that's not gonna happen … You know what I'm going to get custody and you can't stop me"

"Not if I prove you're not fit to look after him?"

Marc starts his defense seeing how heated the pair of them are "Mr Hayes you would need to prove that to the Judge …. You know we will counter with proof of treatment and that she is over her period of issues. Based on that and your current occupation a judge may be inclined to offer a permanent residency to my client with of course visitation rights for yourself"

"But I can ask she be tested for drink, drugs etcetera?"

"NO!" she laughs, you can't do anything of the sort not without me agreeing to it!"

Marc coughs "actually…" he interjects into the conversation "Ms Lewis I need to make you aware, he could ask as terms of the residency and if the judge was inclined he could order that you take regular sobriety tests as part of order agreement!"

"What?" she frowns at Marc while Jason gives a smug look "he can't do that surely? Not if I don't agree to it?"

Jason sneers at her "why does it matter? I thought you said you were in control of the drinking now?"

She looks at him stony cold with no emotion  
"I am! I'm just saying you can't make me do something I don't want to!"

"Yeah sure you are! .. well there won't be a problem then. I tell you what you arrange a test and pass it … and I'll _talk_ about you seeing JC"

She swallows hard and looks at Marc "he can't do that can he? not if we just go for the straight-out residency"

"errrmm .. well to be honest it does seem reasonable request ..and in a legal sense… if he's in agreement with that .. then it would be best in the interests of an out of court solution and my advice would be to accept it only as part of an agreement"

"But he can't force me to take a test right?"

"No! he can't force it .. but errrm.. if that was the terms for an agreement then you would have to abide by it, or he could withdraw consent to access"

Jason now laughs "So what's the problem CJ? You wanna see your son or not?" He smiles because he knows exactly what the problem is

"My problem is.. I'm not being told what to do by you! You're not having any control over my life anymore!"

"I don't want control over your life… I just wanna know my son is going to be safe with you… so they're my terms take it or leave it!"

She looks at Marc and Matt  
"So you're both just gonna stand there?" she frowns " I'm supposed to be paying you to sort this!"

"Errmm…" Marc looks at Matt "I'm not sure what you want me to advise ... he's stated his terms. Are you accepting them or not? as your lawyer my advice is you accept .. I really don't see the problem? We can draw up an agreement that once the first tests are completed we can enter discussions about visitation"

Jason laughs "you don't see the problem?" he shakes his head and laughs again "… the problem is she can't stay away from the drink…look pal if she can't stop drinking when she's pregnant..then she... "  
Jason bites his lip ans he closes his eyes "Sorry! I didn't mean to bring that up!" He realises that was unfair on her and wishes he could take it back.

Her lip quivers and her eyes fill with tears  
"Just shut up! Stop laughing at me…I said SHUT UP!" She rubs her head. Jason's getting to her now that comment stung "Arrrghhhh!"

She gathers herself  
"So what are you going to do if I just take him now? Take him back to Washington… how are you gonna stop me!" she smiles "you can't afford to take me on in court?"

Marc shifts his weight from foot to foot he's uncomfortable with the confrontation and Jason looks at him

"Oh, believe me CJ … I will stop you… physically if I have to! you're NOT taking my son!"

Matt intervenes " just calm down both of you. Please for his sake." he looks at the sleeping Jaycee on his shoulder "Catherine look he's tired… maybe we should get him inside?"

"No! you just wait.." she turns and points at him to stay where he is " take him back to the car if he's tired"

"Catherine please .. let Jason put him to bed… we can sort this another time.. I'm sure once he has time to calm down from the worry of today .. he will talk to you about this .. won't you Jason?"

Jason looks at Marc "She can't do that though can she? She can't just take him… I have a legal order saying he lives here...with me!"

Marc lowers his eyes not looking at her "No you're right... she can't do that" he looks at Matt

"NO! what do you mean NO?...Who the hell are you acting for here?" she turns her anger to Marc " I'm not paying for you to side with him! I was told you'd do whatever it took to get my son. This is no use to me.. you siding with him"

"I'm here to advise you in a legal capacity… as it stands at this moment he has a legal residency order...I can't overturn that without taking it back to court.. and that will take time"

"he got it behind my back! When I wasn't well!"

"no matter when it was obtained Ms Lewis… it's a legal ruling. if you were to take your son without Mr Hayes consent … you would be breaking the law"

She tries to stay calm but she's so angry. She never did like being told she can't do something. She looks at Jason then back at Marc  
"You need to FIX THIS!... I want my son" she turns to face Jason "I promise you this is not done by any means! I _will_ get my son back!"

She leaves and gets back in the car slamming the door "FUCK!"

"Phewwww!" Marc lets out a long sigh and looks at Matt "I think may be its best if I get a cab back … tell her I'll call and make any arrangements she wants going forward! I'm sorry I couldn't be more help but…"

Matt nods "it's fine .. I understand" they all look at each other and Marc leaves

Matt hands JC to Jason  
"Jason I'm sorry.." he looks back at the car "I know .. we've had our issues but… I'm really worried … she's out of control at the moment …she's either gonna self-destruct again.. or someone's going to get hurt!"

Jason laughs "You lot are unbelievable! You just don't know her do you... Someone's going to get hurt ?.. Clay's already in hospital! How hurt do you want?"

Matt stays calm  
"I understand what you're saying but Jason…. she needs help. There are things I do know …. And she has a lot going on in her head that even in our sessions she never talked about. I still don't know what went on in Damascus .. and her father's death….it affected her badly even is she won't admit it but I know she plays that day over and over blaming herself"

"Jeez.. you want me to feel sorry for her now? What after she took my son? ... She had Clay beaten within an inch of his life?"

"No .. I'm not asking you to feel sorry for her.. just have some sympathy….Jason come on you know her better than anyone … Jason you love the woman….. you know she's more than this!" He shakes his head "look I don't wanna even imagine anymore what she might be capable of if pushed too far!"

He closes his eyes "Jason.. If you still care about her .. and I think you do.. Just give me some time… to arrange some proper help!"

Jason laughs "Yeah, good luck with that … her father's been the only one managed that so far and that just about destroyed her!"

"Yeah I know how hard it will be but she might not have any other choice" he looks back at the car again "Just please .. don't do anything for now just give me some time"  
He tickles JC under the chin "You know he's a credit to you!"  
he pauses as he steps away "she does love him ….& you! That's the problem… what ever happened to her .. she's lashing out and destroying the things she loves so she doesn't get hurt again! It's her way of coping by controlling when things when they seem out of her control"

Jason laughs "What's this shrink talk for she's a messed-up alcoholic who wants her own way!"

Matt smiles "Yeah fine laugh.. I'm just offering my expert opinion. She needs protecting or she's gonna hurt her self or someone else.. but then I'm not telling you anything you don't already know." He lets out a long sigh

She lets the car window down "Matt! ..What the hell's going on? are we getting out of here or what?"

Jason looks at Matt "Okay! …..but just keep her away from us for now or I will do something we'll all regret!"

"Yeah I'll try!" he sighs as he heads to the car "I'll be in touch"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Daniel's at the hospital he's called Mandy

She finally finds his room where he's sitting on the bed  
"What the hell happened to you?" she sees his badly beaten face and broken arm "Daniel who did this ?"

He shakes his head "it's nothing don't worry!...look I shouldn't have called you really but… I didn't know who else to call"

"Daniel what happened? _Tell me_.. what's this about?"

"Oh Mandy!..." He closes his eyes and lets out a long sigh "My sister!"

"What? Your sister? .. What the hell are you saying that your sister did this?" She frowns "what kind of Sister is she?... Daniel talk to me… I'm confused. Your sister beat you up?"

"No!.. not her.. though she probably could if she wanted" he sighs in a resigned tired way "… she sent some people after me"

"Why? Why would she do that to her own brother?"

He shakes his head.. "Mandy it's complicated….. but it's because I …I put you before her!" he closes his eyes "I messed up an operation she had going on … because it put _you_ in danger!" he sighs again " _She_ put you in danger!" 

Mandy frowns and shakes her head "Sorry I still don't understand. Why was I in danger?"

"The informant about your safe house being compromised?….. It was me! The person who leaked the safe house location …... was Catherine…. my sister!" 

"What?" the frown on Mandy's face deepens  
"Daniel I still don't understand… how did she know? Hold on did you say your sisters called Catherine?" Mandy takes a deep breath "oh SHIT! Do you mean your sisters' ….."

He nods "yeah! …. Yeah my sister's Catherine Lewis" he closes his eyes.  
He's so tired. The last few days has stripped him of all his energy 

Mandy frowns "CJ's your sister? But how?.. I mean….I don't understand why would she do this to you?.. you're her brother?... Daniel this makes no sense"

"If you knew her it does" he shakes his head leaning his tired head back against the pillow "It's because I went against her .. I stopped her .. her plan to have you killed!"

"What?" she frowns "Have me killed.. what you mean in Mexico? Why…..why would she do that? she had no reason to do that?"

"she did in her head! Mandy you have to understand she's messed up and .. and she sees you as a threat for Jason's affections!" 

"Huh!" Mandy frowns in disbelief  
"Her and Jason are over… me and Jason are just friends!… Does Jason know what she planned? Does he even know you're her brother?"

He shakes his head  
"No .. no one does!... _arrgghh!_ " he leans back and closes his eyes for a few moments 

"You okay.. can I get you anything?"

"No I'm fine.. just tired.. and sore"

She puts her hand on his cheek and looks deep in his eyes before she kisses him

He smiles "Mandy!...she needs help .. "  
He looks at her "you're beautiful" he strokes her cheek and smiles at her  
"you know I use to admire her living on the edge … I was too boring for her when I was younger. She had this strength. I use to watch her it felt like she could do anything…..survive anything …but now… the way she is! I think she's paying for all that danger and excitement. She's seriously out of control" he shakes his head "I used to be able keep her in check but…not anymore and for the first time she scares me. She _really_ scares me!"

"Hey come on … Daniel you're tired… we can sort this" she puts her arm around him and kisses him again "What're gonna do?"

"I'm not sure yet but… I need get her some help" he looks Mandy in the eyes "for her own good…as well as everyone else… but that's not gonna be easy. I need to make some calls and arrange things"

"Yeah!... Yeah of course. Whatever you need! I'm here" 

he leans forward and puts his lips on hers "thank you!"

She smiles "why don't we go and get a coffee and make these calls"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason's at the hospital visiting Clay

"Hey !"

"Jason!" Clay takes a deep breath in he's not sure he's ready for this. He closes his eyes unsure of the reception he's about to receive  
"Look Jason before you say anything I'm … I'm so sorry! I …I errmmm…. need to explain. I know what happened and I wish….. "

"It's okay.. I know you messed up … but we all did!" he takes a deep breath in "it's not your fault … she was using you… and guess we all paid the price …Look Clay…. I know her better than anyone .. I should have seen where this was going a long time ago .. shes my responsibility I should have sorted it before now!" he pauses him and Clay acknowledge each other "Anyway, how you doing?"

"I'm sore and a headache … and every time I try to sleep I errrmm.. keep getting these… flash backs to ermmm.. you know.. before when … when Reagan…. But errmm .. I'm gonna be okay!" He takes a deep breath "they gotta look at my hand.. it's pretty messed up where he stamped on it… but they're hoping the loss of feeling is just temporary" he looks at it and rubs the bandage with the other hand "I sure hope so…I only just got myself straight and back operating and now this!"

A tear runs down Clay's cheek "Oh Shit! I'm sorry man.. I didn't mean to act like this"

"It's okay.. take your time… been been a tough ride for all of us"

"how the hell could she do this?"  
He bites his lip trying to not cry again in front of Jason. Trying to be strong and brave when really he just feels tired and weak  
"I don't understand her" he shakes his head "you know when she's _with_ me … it's like I'm the only person in the world that matters to her but then she turns round and lets someone do this! … I just don't understand her. How can I _lov…._. want her so much ..then hate her so much at the same time?"

Jason nods and lets out a long tired sigh. He knows exactly what Clay's saying it's exactly how he's felt over the years  
"I don't think anyone understands her anymore.. if they ever did? I don't even know if she understands what she's doing!"

He closes his eyes shaking his head  
"What I do know is this has all gone too far.. there is _NO_ way she is having Jaycee after this… Who the hell knows what she's capable of now but I've gotta put a stop to it!"

"Jason…" Clay frowns "what you gonna do?"

"I don't know yet .. I really don't know!" he sits in the chair by Clay's bed rubbing his head

Mandy appears in the doorway  
"Hey" she knocks softly "I heard you were awake" she smiles at Clay 

Jason looks up "Hey! Mandy what you doing here?"

"errrmm… I had to collect a friend so I thought I'd stop in and see how Clay's doing and I'm glad you're here … we need to talk to you"

Daniel's behind her at the door

"Who's this guy?" Jason frowns seeing how beaten up he is and that he has his arm in plaster "This your _friend_?" 

Mandy looks back "errmmm… Yeah he's my _friend_ …. My _good_ friend. . he errmm…" she pauses, closes her eyes and takes a deep breath in before saying her next sentence " He's CJ's brother!"

"What?" Jason stands up looks confused with a deep set frown on his brow  
"You're her brother? What the hell.. What are you here for? I told her earlier shes not getting Jaycee.. so don't …"

"Jason.. whoa!.. he's not here about any of that!"

Clay sits up in the bed "Her brother?... what the hell's happened to you? Did she do that?"

Daniel closes his eyes  
"I was the errrmm…. the one who told you Mandy was in trouble. I mean I passed the information on to your Commander" he pauses " I had to ..… Catherine was gonna have …..gonna have Mandy killed!"

"What?" Jason frowns and looks round at everyone in the room "she was gonna what? …Why?"

Sonny and Ray arrive at the room doorway. They're now catching up on the conversation 

"Jason it's true… she got in her head that something was going on with me and you" she watches his reaction

Daniel's rubbing his bandaged arm as Jason looks at him. He sees how badly beaten he is "Hey look I'm sorry… come you need to sit down!"  
he moves away from the chair he'd been sitting in and Daniel is glad to rest himself there 

everyone looks at him and Clay. The bruises and bandages on them both

Sonny looks back at Jason  
"She did this? She did this to Clay?...What the hell!... I'll kill her .. I really will kill her this time!"

"Sonny calm down!"

"Jesus Jason this has gotta end. How many more people do you wanna get hurt?"

"Yeah I know!… but what can I do?"

Clay frowns "Jace… if she can do this … what the hell's she gonna do if she doesn't get to see Jaycee? I don't wanna even imagine .. " he takes a deep breath rubbing his head  
"wait .. you don't think she'd hurt Jaycee?.. do you?" Clay frowns. Jason shrugs "no! … No I can't believe she'd hurt him… she wouldn't do that"

Jason rubs his head

"Clay I'm not sure what she's capable of doing anymore!"

Everyone now looks at each other but no one speaks

Daniel looks up

" I have plan! " he sighs "but she's not gonna like it… but errrm…. we need to do it but we need to get her here to the hospital first"

"What?" Jason frowns " a plan to do what?"

"Jason just listen to him for a minute" Mandy puts her hand on his arm "he wants to help her…. We need to do this to keep everyone safe"

"we need to get her here to the hospital" Daniel closes his eyes and bites his lip "she'll come here for you .. if you ask her"

"Why?" he frowns "What you gonna do?"

Daniel shakes his head "look there's no choice now" he sighs "I've got a private facility on standby Matt sorted the authorisation side… they'll take her!"

Jason laughs "She'll never go .. not willingly .. you'll never get her to agree to that. Jesus look what happened last time ….Do you not remember she tried to kill herself"

"No I know she won't go willingly… but they'll use force if needs be…Jason they can handle this I organised it with Matt.. he says they're specialists in dealing with people like her.. it's what they do"

Jason frowns  
"Wait they won't hurt her will they?... I don't want them to hurt her.. she's ill .. she needs help. She doesn't need any more hurt"

Mandy sighs "Jason we have to do this…. she needs this help.. you have to be strong now and make the right decision"

" they'll give her the help she needs.. however long it takes but you know she won't go of her own free will.. she won't accept that help." Daniel frowns " I don't want them to hurt her either… they'll sedate her but… they have powers to errm…." He gulps "… use force if she won't agree"

Jason gulps "Shit!" he rubs his head " I don't know about this. I don't like it!... I mean forcing her" he frowns thinking ".. she's had enough of that"

"Jace" Sonny looks at him "look at what she's doing man… who she's hurting .. he's her brother he's saying you need to do this…. Jason for god sake wake up… you gotta think about Jaycee what about if she does hurt him… you'll never forgive yourself if you don't do something now."

"I know but forcing her? Shit!" he squats down on the floor and puts his head in his hands "that's why we are where we are because everyone keeps forcing .. Matt said that… he said its cos she just wants to be in control… It was your father started this … when forced her out of the Navy and into Rehab!"

"No!...My father knew how out of control she was even then. . he did it for the right reasons and like us he didn't have any choice"

"SHIT!... I need a minute" Jason rubs his face and stands up " I need some air"  
he gets up and leaves the room

They all look at each other again and Sonny shakes his head  
"Shit! Why the hell can't he see this need to happen?"

Clay looks at Sonny "he can… it's just making that decision that's hard .. he just needs a minute. We're asking him to make her do something she'll hate.. he's right last time he tried this .. well… He still blames himself for that ...Just give him a time … he'll make the right decision"

Mandy nods and looks at them all "I'll go talk to him.. I'll make him see sense!"

Sonny looks at Clay then at Daniel "but you don't need him to agree… you're her brother.. you can make the decision Right? You don't need Jason to approve it?"

Daniel sighs "The decisions already been made.. I'd just rather he agrees… she'll listen to him more than me. I need him to get her here.. she won't come for me" He looks at everyone in the room "this isn't gonna be easy but it really is for the best. Jason just needs to see that no one wants to hurt her, least of all me.. but she's hurting other people "

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason's back to the room with Mandy following behind

"Okay!" he nods "Okay!.. we do this! I've still got reservations about it.. but it's the right thing, I think you're right… we don't have any choices" he picks up his phone to call her

"CJ …it's me… I need to see you. We need to talk. Can you meet me at the hospital?... yeah I'm visiting Clay He wants to see you too. We need…. "he pauses "….We need to talk about this situation and the situation with Jaycee and find a solution"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She smiles and puts down her phone she looks at Matt

"See ….I knew he'd come around … he wants to talk now … probably worried I'm gonna get custody and there's nothing he can do!" she laughs " I'm gonna meet him at the hospital and see Clay at the same time.. they _wanna move_ forward" she smiles

Matt nods "that's good… about talking ….why the Hospital though?"

She swallows hard "ermmm…Clay's there … he ermmm .. he got into some trouble!"

"Trouble?.. What trouble?"

She shrugs "Oh … I don't know… think he was robbed. You wanna drive me?"

"Yeah!...Yeah sure of course I will… I'll just use the bathroom"

he closes the bathroom door and looks at his phone then texts Daniel - "we're on our way"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They arrive at the hospital. And enter Clay's room

"Daniel?" she frowns "what the hell are you doing here? I've been trying to call you … Are you okay?"

"Yes!.. yeah I'm fine!" he smiles at her "don't worry .. it's all sorted now!"

She looks around seeing Mandy and Sonny

"Okay what the hell's going on?" she frowns as she stays in the doorway. The atmosphere in the room is starting to make her feel apprehensive "Jason what's this about… I thought _we_ were talking"

"We are... talking"

"This looks more like an ambush!"

"It's not .. CJ… we're just trying to help you" he sighs "you need help so let us help you" 

She laughs "yeah right … Okay so what's this a therapy session?"

she looks at Matt behind her  
"What?.. we all air our issues and then say sorry? Then everything's fixed"  
she laughs but the frown on her head deepens all these people are making her nervous

"Okay! … alright .. I'll go first. Yeah sorry!...I'm sorry about what's happened!... okay ..Yeah it got a bit out of control, but I'll sort it …..no more drinking.. I promise" she smiles but she gets no response back

Clay smiles at her. He does feel sorry for her.  
Jason looks at the floor knowing what they are planning he feels like he's betraying her

"Catherine!" Daniel stands up

She gulps and frowns now she feels really unsure of whats going on, but she doesn't like it. Then she spots the two large male nurses in the corridor.  
She backs out of the door into the corridor "Okay can someone tell me what the hell's going on here?"

Matt's behind her "Catherine we're just trying to do what's best"

"Sorry what? You're speaking to me?. Best?... best for who?" she looks round the room "Jason What the hell's going on?"

She sees the syringe in one of the nurse's hands "Daniel ..did you do this?... Is this because of her?" she nods at Mandy… "Oh maybe she did it? Did you tell her… Whispered in her ear…. Little pillow talk?"

Daniel takes a deep sigh "Catherine… I'm sorry … but I'm sending you away for a while….You need some help .. just go with them. Don't make it hard!"

"No! …No!...NO! this is not happening … I'm not going anywhere… I just wanted to see my son!" 

"CJ please .. just take the help they're offering" Jason pleads with her

"Wait what? you're in on this too?"

"CJ please!... you need help. Jesus Christ … look what you did to Clay .. to your brother… surely that tells you somethings wrong."

" I never did that… I mean I never did it myself" she rubs her head. She does feel bad seeing how beaten they are

"But you gave the orders.. and you sent people after Mandy"

She grinds her teeth "You told them that? Geez!... SHIT… I trusted you Daniel and you let me down again."

She thinks for a moment all this pressure it making her head hurt and she rubs it with both hands trying to keep her head clear  
"I'm sorry okay.. I guess I went too far .. I shouldn't have.. I shouldn't have done it.. what do you want me to do ..I said I'm sorry!"

"CJ we've all let you down as well… we should have put a stop to this well before now .. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have let it get his far… I knew you needed help and I ignored it"

"Well you can forget this! What ever little plan you've cooked up… I'm not going anywhere .. and you can't make me!"

Matt sighs "Yeah they can.. I'm sorry but I've authorised you being committed … as your psychiatrist I signed off on it.. I know you don't want it but it's for the best"

"Wait!... What ?" she takes deep breath "NO! you can't do that! I'm not doing this ….I'm not going there… please Jason!.. please do something don't let them do this .. I asked you last time"  
she starts to cry  
"Jason please .. I'm sorry.. I never meant to take Jaycee.. I just wanted to see him. Jason!"

Jason looks at her his eyes are welling up with tears he can see the pain in her face " CJ please… do this… do this for me. Just go with them. I'll come and see you .Just take the help!"

She's angry now  
"Shut UP! Just SHUT UP! I'm not doing this! You can't make me!"

One of the nurses steps forward with the syringe and he gets it in her shoulder but in her anger she lashes out and catching him off guard he falls over.  
She knocks the syringe from his hand and only a small amount of the sedative went into her skin.  
She rubs at the mark that it made. "owwwwh!"

Now she's even more angry with them all and he pulls the gun they didn't realise she had  
"This this is not happening. Do you understand.. I am not going there!"

her shoulder burns and she rubs at it again. Her head is groggy "What the hell was that?"

It's not enough to knock her out as intended but enough to cloud her head and vision.  
She rubs her head as she grabs Mandy by the hair "You're coming with me!"

Daniel steps forward "NO! Catherine NO! You let her go!"

She laughs "or what? you call this off and then I'll let her go but don't worry! I'll send her back for you when I'm done… probably in a body bag! NOW MOVE!" she points the gun at Mandy indicating for her to move to the side of the corridor 

The nurse has raised the alarm and two-armed security guards arrive 

"DROP THE WEAPON! or we will fire"

She laughs as she grabs hold of Mandy twisting her hair round her hand  
"I don't think so ….now move!"

"CJ .. listen to me… please don't do this.. let me talk to you"  
Jason tries to reason with her "you wanna see Jaycee?.. let Mandy go and I'll take you to see him! Please CJ .. you don't need to do this. Just give me the gun.. come on"

"Jason why… Why couldn't you just let me see Jaycee we could have avoided all this . I just wanted to see my son!"

"I know.. I know.. and you will. You just have to get better first!"

"No… No that's not gonna happen now.. you lied to me .. you told me you loved me… you wanted to be with me for us to be normal.. a family" tears roll down her cheeks, but she tightens the grip on Mandy's hair

"Oowwww! CJ you're hurting me!"

"SHUT the fuck up!" she wipes the tears from her cheek

"I did .. CJ, I do! I just can't be with you … not when you're like this. Please just give me the gun and let Mandy go!"

"You wanted her" she twists Mandy's hair tighter around her hand "you told me we were over and then you wanted her"

"No!" he frowns confused. He can see the anger building in her face "Is this why you're upset … you thought me and Mandy.. no, we're just friends… just friends that's all…I swear to you… is this what this is all about?"

She's confused and crying. She can't think clearly. Her head is clouded by the sedative she rubs it and tries to shake off the feeling

" I said DROP THE WEAPON!"

She can see all the people and hear all the shouting but it's like she's in a different place, distant to them all . Her head is all cloudy like she's swimming underwater

Mandy tries to pull away but she tightens the grip on her hair "I don't think so bitch!"

Jason takes a deep sigh "Please CJ give me the gun… "

"No!" she looks him in the eyes "we were so good together always… we made JC… we were gonna have another baby" she starts crying

"I know.. I know" he swallows hard he can see the pain in her face "CJ I know you're hurting right now .. please let us help you. Put the gun down"

She rubs her head as her vision starts to cloud again.  
Mandy sees her moment of weakness and lashes out getting herself free from her grip.

As she does the gun goes off followed seconds later by a second shot.

Both Mandy and CJ drop to the floor and then there's lots of rushing around and commotion in the corridor. The floor is covered in blood.

Now as Daniel and Sonny grab Mandy's arms, she stands up  
"I'm fine it's not me… it's not mine the blood…. it's not me"

Mandy stands shaking while they look her over. She's taking deep panicking breathes. She looks at her shaking hands…"I'm not hurt"

Jason drops to the floor where CJ lies  
"CJ . . hold on .." he can see the red blood patch on the front of her T shirt

She holds her chest "aaarrrgghhhh!... Jason ….I.. can't….. breathe"

"HOLD on we'll get some help!"

Her body starts to shake as she chokes on the blood in her throat. Jason still has her in his arms as she looks at him "Jason…."

"Just hold on!" he says it, but he knows it's too late he can see the life draining from her eyes

"I..….." she chokes "I..lo…."

"Shhh! CJ please…" He kisses her "Just hold on!"

"… I love …"

"I know, I know!...GET SOME HELP!... Oh god please… don't you dare die….CJ.. CJ! Oh shit" he buries his face against hers as she closes her eyes.

"Oh Shit!"  
He's covered in blood at they try to move him "NO!... get off me!" He holds her tight as tears run down his cheek. He swallows hard rocking back and forwards

The security officer who didn't fire kicks her weapon away "Clear!"

The medical staff start to rally round her "Sir… Sir we need to …please Sir" they look at each other as he won't let go  
"You're too late…" he closes his eyes "I said you're too late…. She's gone!" he looks round at everyone "She's gone! …What the hell have we done?!"

Everyone looks at each other as he leans crying into her lifeless body  
"CJ…" he kisses her hoping against hope that she might open her eyes

"Please sir we need to ….."

Mandy puts her hand on his shoulder "Jason you need to let go!"

"No!... No! we did this .." he looks up

"Jace Brother.." Ray puts his hand on his back and squats down beside him "Jason… time to let her go… come one man.. we get some air"

"Shit Ray!... what the hell..this wasn't supposed to happen … we we're supposed to be helping her"

"I know… I know .. come on man let's get some air!"

Eventually he does let go and as he gets up as he wipes this hand through is hair transferring her blood on his face  
"Shit!... oh, Jesus" he's crying hard now as Ray walks him away down the corridor while the medical team cover her body over.

"Oh shit!" Sonny lets out a deep sigh.  
Clay holds back his tears Shaking his head. "Oh my god…" He closes his eyes "What the hell happened?"

Sonny shakes his head ".. I don't know man!" he lets out a long sigh. Everyone just stands in stunned silence.

Police officers arrive and start interviewing the security guards as Daniel looks at Mandy. He closes his eyes taking in the scene for a moment as he stands looking at her body lying covered on the corridor floor.

Wiping away his tears he shakes his head in disbelief "Oh god Catherine! Why couldn't you have just listened"  
he closes his eyes as they fill with tears  
"I'm so sorry…we were just trying to help you. It was never meant to end like this!"


	61. Chapter 61

Chapter 61: This is on me!

_**I know what I said about the end but someone asked what happened next! :)** _

_**those that wondering I think I worked out (or have written it) that JC is approx 2.5yrs old now  
He was approx 11mnths at the Gala dinner so depending on time hop gaps between some chapters that is my estimate I hope Ive got it right **_

"Jace!.. Jace Man!…" Ray calls after him "JASON!...Jason…. please man…look just wait!"

" What Ray? What?... You gonna fix it? You gonna make it better with your words of sympathy?.. Is that gonna bring her back?... I don't need your pity… Just leave me alone Ray"

"Jace… Jason come on!... Brother come back! … Look the police are gonna wanna speak to you"

Jason's pacing back and forward in the empty corridor as he slams his hand hard into the door "FUCK!"  
He looks at his hand as it stings from where he slams the door. He realizes they're still covered in her blood. He looks at them turning them over in front himself just looking at the color  
"Oh god!" he closes his eyes as they burn with his tears but taking a deep breath he holds them in.

"Jason don't!... Please man" Ray puts his hand on his shoulder " come on .. come back with me!"  
Jason shrugs him off

Ray closes his eyes and takes a deep breath he's not sure how to help his friend as he can see the pain and the hurt in his face.  
Normally he has some words of comfort to use but he knows this time nothing will fix the pain.

The doors open towards them as a man carrying flowers and smiling comes rushing through. As he does he bumps into Jason who is still back and forwards pacing.  
"what the hell you son of bitch watch where you're going !" Jason grabs hold of the guy and slams him against the wall

"Hey man!" The guy looks horrified and scared, taken completely by surprise at Jason's actions

"Just look what the fuck you're doing in future!" Jason has hold of him as Ray steps in

"Jason….brother what the hell?… Jason let go!" he looks at the guy's face "Jace man this isn't his fault. He's just going about his business, man .. let him go" he takes Jason's hand off the guys jacket as he does Jason looks away embarrassed at his actions as he realises he's gone too far

Ray checks the guy "You alright?... Look sorry! He's sorry. He didn't mean it … he errrm…. he's just had some bad news.. we're sorry okay?" Ray nods apologetically

"Yeah sure!...I'm fine" the guy gulps. He's shocked and looks Jason up and down, shaking his head before he carries on down the corridor.

Ray shakes his head "Jace man… you need to calm down!"

Jason looks away and leans his head against the wall "What the hell have we done Ray? .. we did this!... I knew pushing her …..it was a bad idea"

"Come on man…. no one knew she'd react like this …Man… no one knew she had that gun!"

Jason laughs "No one knew?" he laughs again "of course I knew any one that knew CJ knew she did … when have you ever known CJ not carry one?"

he shakes his head as he sighs letting out a long breath then squats down against the wall running both his blood covered hands through his hair before he closes his eyes and takes a deep breath trying to take a moment and get his feelings in check  
"Just go Ray! Just go!... I wanna be on my own"

Jace…. I'm not leaving you man … not like this!.. Look let me take you home?"

"NO! …No. I just wanna be on my own. Just leave me alone Ray"

"Sure….. Okay … but I'll wait with the others till you're ready!" he puts his hand on his shoulder "I'm for you man … whatever you need.. you know that right?"

"Yeah sure!" Jason sighs again "Ray… I'm sorry .. I just need…."he shakes his head trying to grasp the enormity of what happened " .. I know you're only trying to help "

Ray pats Jason on the shoulder and nods and heads off back down the corridor to the others

Jason drops his head in his hands

"Shit… what the hell" he rubs his face

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Everyone's standing round Clay's bed. Daniel's sitting in the chair. Ray comes back to the room and everyone looks at him

"How's he doing?" Clay frowns

Ray shakes his head "Not good .. he's blaming himself. Saying we shouldn't have pushed her into this … I don't know" he lets out a long-exasperated sigh

Clay bites his lip. He knows how Jason feels because in his head he's blaming himself too

He moves himself round in the bed and a pain shoots through his body. He pushes the morphine pump another click as he grimaces at the agony.  
"Ah shit…" he closes his eyes "Phewwww!" he breathes through the ache " why the hell wouldn't she listen for once"

Sonny looks at him taking his tooth pick out his mouth "When the hell would she listen, ever.. how many times have we said that?... that's why we're sitting here like this"

Daniel sits quiet

"You okay?" Mandy frowns as she sees his face is contorted with pain and him rubbing his arm "you need some more pain relief"

"Yeah maybe .. look I think I should probably head off?"

Sonny looks at him "The cops still need to speak to us. They said to wait here"

Daniel sits back down "Oh right … okay… but I don't know what more help I can be.. and there's things I need to take care of"

The clatter of movement outside the room window makes them all look up, as the medical staff push the trolley with her body slowly past and down the open corridor

Clay keeps watching out the window to the room he sees Jason standing there.

Jason's back outside the room and he stops the trolley by putting his hand on it

the medics look at him

"can you just give me a minute?" he frowns "Please"

they look at each other then back at Jason " Yeah sure! Just a couple of minutes though we need to …you know"

He nods. "Yeah I just need a moment"  
he bites his cheek holding back his tears as he slowly uncovers her face. He takes a sharp intake of breath "Oh! Shit.."

He looks at her and pushes the wisps of her hair back from her cheek.  
He thinks how perfect she looks lying there, like she's just asleep. Like so many times before when she's laid beside him and he's watched her peacefully sleeping except this time all the worries and stress gone

"Oh god CJ… Why?"  
His lip quivers and he takes in a deep breath through his nose trying to hold his emotions. His eyes full of tears and his head starts to shake. He peels the cover back further to the spot on her chest where the blood from the wound sits.

He hovers his now shaking hand over it before he gently touches her. She's still slightly warm to the touch which makes him draw breath "oh god!"  
he puts his hand gently on the wound "CJ… please!" he's shaking as two large tears roll down his cheek on to her "please…no!" he shakes his head and closes his eyes

The nurse looks at him "Mr Hayes" she puts her hand on his hand smiling gently and caringly at him "we need to take her now"  
she gives him this look of pity "Please sir. You need to let her go" She puts her other hand and on his arm getting his attention

He nods biting his lip hard and leans down and kisses her lips before the nurse gently covers her back over

"Shit!" he holds his stomach; it hurts so much from the knot of pain in it. He turns away and faces the wall as the nurse pushes the trolley away, before slumping down in the corridor seats.

Mandy looks at the others in the room as she nods at them all "I'll go"

She sits down beside him "Jason.. I'm.. I'm so sorry! I know how hard this must be"

"Don't!... don't you dare!" he clenches his teeth together "Don't you dare tell me you're sorry…..you're not sorry… you hated her .. you all did … I ll bet you're all glad" he swallows hard "now you all got what you wanted" he sighs "she's gone, gone for good.. but did you all think about her little boy…"  
it takes all his energy to hold back his anger and tears now "Shit! …" he shake his head "all she wanted Mandy was to see him...God! all I had to do was let her see him.. but NO! ….No… cos I wanted to hurt her… I wanted her to …pay. I used that against her … _ohhh!_ " he drops his head in his hands

"Jason!" Mandy wipes a tear from her cheek "Jason.. no one wanted this .. we were just trying to help her.. Jason please come on …" she puts her hand on his arm and lean her head against his shoulder

For a moment he accepts her comfort but then suddenly he's filled with anger and pushes her off "No! No.. you don't!... Get off me! I don't want your sympathy"

"Jason!...Jason where are you going?"

"Going?.. Where am I going? I'm going home Mandy … to see our son…" he sucks in his tears "her son… to …" he closes his eyes and swallows hard "to tell him…his Mommy's gone." He bites his lip hard "shit!"

"Jason… you don't have to do this alone ….." it's too late by the time she gets her words out he's gone

Ray puts his hand on Mandy's shoulder "Just leave him …. he needs some time"

She shakes her head "I didn't think he still felt like this about her.. I thought they were over Ray?"

"I don't know Mandy… trust me over the years… I've tried to understand what's behind those two but hell" he laughs "I don't think I'll ever understand it"  
he shakes his head and shrugs "but no matter what.. he's gonna need some time We just have to be there for him"

Daniel comes to the door and Mandy gets up and puts her arms around his waist and leans her head on his shoulder and starts to cry. The shock from everything is now starting to take its toll on her

"Hey, come on!" he kisses the top of her head "I'll take you home .." he looks at the police officer "can we do this later?"

"Yeah! sure thing .. I think we've got most of what we need anyway. We'll be in touch!"

A figure in a suit stands in the corridor waiting as they go to leave. Daniel looks up meeting their eyes  
"Daniel!" he pauses "we need to talk"

"Not now" he looks at Mandy "let's get you out of here"

"Daniel.. don't put this off."

"I said not now! I'll be in touch!"

Mandy looks up she's still shaking from shock "whats going on ?" she frowns "do I know him?" she tries to think if she recognises the tall suited man

"No! I don't think so" Daniel smiles and shakes his head "Don't worry about it .. let's just get out of here"

Daniel looks at him and in a lower whispered voice he answers "I _will_ be in touch"

He nods and is gone

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay leans back in his bed and pushes the morphine pump button again

"You in pain?" Sonny frowns as he sees the look on Clay's face

"Yeah a bit … It's okay … I just need a moment"

Sonny nods "yeah sure. Hey!.. Clay .. listen man don't you go blaming yourself for this .. this was all her own fault. She caused this no one else.. Nothin' you could have done could have stopped this .. you understand that?"

Ray looks up at Sonny then back a Clay.

Trent who arrived during all the commotion lets out a long sigh and looks at them all.  
He's angry they are all blaming her, and he can't stay quiet any longer "I warned Jason" he sighs "several times. I told him she was vulnerable …especially after she lost the baby but he didn't listen … In her head, her mental state after everything that happened to her, but no one saw it!... No one did enough me included and now this is the consequences and you wonder why you're all surprised?" He lets out a sigh.

Trent really did care for C.J and she confided a lot in him about everything,somethings she never told anyone and he kept those confidences and he tried to help her but in the end he couldn't and that's what he feels worst about.

He sees Clay grimace in pain "Let me have a look at you" he looks in Clay's eyes "where's the pain hurt the most?"

Sonny shakes his head he suddenly feels consumed by tiredness and sits down  
"Shit! what a fuck up this is!" He looks at Ray

Ray sighs "I know!" he rubs his hand on his chin and downs over his beard "it sure is!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason arrives back at his house and pulls the truck in the driveway.

He sits there and doesn't get out. Just sitting there with his head leaned against the truck window glass.  
His tears run down his face and he sits there without realising he's doing it, using the truck key just scratching and picking at the leather on the steering wheel cover

"Shit!"  
He frowns as he thumps the wheel with his hand then doesn't stop and keeps banging and thumping the wheel till he accidentally hits the horn.  
He jumps at the jolt the sound makes. Then looks at himself in the side mirror seeing how tired he looks and the ache in his head which he rubs with the heel of his palm against his forehead. He rubs it hard, harder and harder trying to make the pain go away  
"Oh Shit! …shit!.. I'm sorry… I'm so sorry!... Oh god" he shakes his head then leans it back against the leather head rest closing his eyes

The sound of the horn brings Linda to the door. She frowns as she sees him sitting there wondering what's happened.  
"Jaycee go inside honey.. Daddy will be right in .. there's a good boy!... go back inside like Grandma said. We're just here!"

She comes to the side window of the truck and watches her son sitting there "Jason?... Jason.. what's happened?... Son tell me?"

he opens the door and nearly falls into her arms. She wraps his head in her hands "oh dear lord… son what on earth has happened?"

"She…" he sucks in air " she.. " he can't get his words out

"She?... who?... Son… Jason talk to me?"

"CJ …" he rubs his eye sockets with his fingers trying to clear the tears. He takes a moment before speaking " sh …. she's dead"

"Son.. oh .. I mean what?" Linda's confused and doesn't know what to say.  
She's been here before with him when he thought she was dead but for some reason the pain in him this time feels way worse almost like this time there's something different

"You know last time I thought she was dead .. there was part of me could still feel her…. this time she feels gone .. I can't feel anything"

"Son.. I .. I don't what to say.. What happened?"

He shakes his head … "we did this….. I did this! This is on me!"

"I'm sure that's not true Son whatever's happened .. it's not on you! .. Jason…" she takes a deep breath "it's the kinda life she lived .. you know that … she was always taking a risk with something"

"Don't!" he's angry and pulls back from her " Why is everyone trying to blame her?... All she wanted to do was see her son and I stopped her … this is my fault .. this is on me!"

"No son .. no, it's not… you can't think like that"

"Yeah!... yeah I can …and now I've gotta explain to that little boy … that killed his mom!"

Linda takes a really deep breath and shakes her head as she watches her broken son walk past. He gets to the front door and his son in his arms

She puts her hand to her mouth "oh Son!" she closes her eyes and tear rolls down her cheek .

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o 

"Arrrgghhhh! No …. NO!... NOooo….Get off… Noooo…..NO!"

"Clay! ..Clay, Clay man wake up!" Sonny shakes Clay awake "Hey man wake up .. just a dream… Clay .. it's Sonny it's just a dream man… I got ya….I got yah Clay!"

Sonny takes a deep breath as Clay opens his eyes with a jolt then desperately clings to him as he wakes from the nightmare he's having

"Oh Shit! … shit!" He sits up rubbing his head "phewwww!" the sweat is streaming off him and he feels breathless

"Same one again?" Sonny frowns at him concerned

"Yeah!... Yeah it was" he takes a moment wiping his forehead "I'm good man.. just give me a minute!"

"Yeah!.. sure thing"

"Sonny. .. Thanks man!"

"Hey don't sweat it .. .I'm here for ya man.. got ya six always you know that!" he smiles as he fist bumps on Clay's shoulder, and he gets up and heads back to his bed.

He stops at the doorway "err Clay .. just give me a warning next time ya gonna scream like a girl… that damn near gave me a heart attack" he smiles

Clay laughs "yeah sure man!"

He slumps back in his pillow the relief washing over him  
"Shit!"  
he sighs as he lays there thinking about the dream .. it's more like flashback from when he was held hostage with a mixture of CJ crying and him not able to reach her.  
The dreams have been coming more often now and each time he wakes in a sweat soaked panic

The feeling subsides and licks his lips _"I'm thirsty"_ he gets up and heads into the kitchen area to get a drink of water

"Clay you okay?" Sonny calls out from his room

Clay smiles it's nice that Sonny's listening out for him "Yeah man I'm good thanks!...Sonny go back to sleep man .. I'm just getting a drink"

"Okay .. you want me .. you know where I am"

Clay pours the water in to the glass and stands by the sink watching the tap drip  
"we need to get that fixed"

The past 6 weeks has gone by in a blur of operations and endless drinking. They haven't had time for repairs.  
With Lisa being away and Sonny unsure of getting their relationship back on track as he doesn't want her risking her career for him, they've been making the most of single guy bonding sessions on a regular basis.

Clay's thinking at some point that he needs to get off that treadmill but for now the drinking and partying is keeping his head distracted or it was till this past week when the nightmares started getting more frequent.

He closes his eyes, he knows at some point he may have to admit defeat, as he sees it, and seek some help but for now he's trying to cope by himself  
.

He notices the mail that arrived earlier sitting on the side.. some of the redirected mail from his old apartment.  
He picks it up with his glass of water and goes and sits in the chair. He turns the TV on with no sounds for company and sits with just the low light from it.

He checks Sonny's bedroom door is closed making sure that he's not disturbing him, before leaning back in the chair taking a moment to reflect on the dreams.

Needing a distraction he starts to open the mail. It's just the usual junk, a couple of reminder bills, that he thought he already settled and small Jiffy bag they he doesn't recognise.  
He frowns "what the hell's this?" he looks it over it's just a plain padded bag with a printed label with his name and old apartment address. He notices it has no mail marks either he frowns and gets up to get some scissors from the drawer to open it.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jaycee's jumping on the couch and Jason's laid slumped in front of the TV

"JASON! Are you gonna stop him?... Jaycee GET DOWN…. Jason are you awake? He's running riot here…. Jaycee… I won't tell you again!" Linda let's out a long sigh and rubs her head. She's worn out from Jaycees constant demands "Do you ever do as your told?"

Jason takes no notice just blankly looking at the screen, he's not even dressed.

"Jason!.. are you gonna get dressed?.. or even move from there today?"

He turns and looks at his mother "probably not!"

She sighs "son you need to get back to work .. this is no good for either of you"

He still ignores her

She shakes her head "JAYCEE! I told you … GET … DOWN!"

The little boy turns to look at her and as he does he falls over the back of the couch hitting his head on the table. Dazed and mainly shocked by the fall, he starts to cry.

She sighs. "Ohhhh!"  
She's tired this past six weeks looking after Jaycee and watching her son decline into the man that's now occupying the couch has all taken its toll on her.

She picks Jaycee up. He's sobbing and rubbing his head.  
"I told you what would happen if you didn't get down now look you've hurt yourself." She checks him over it's nothing serious but he's mostly crying from the shock of falling "You know sometimes you're just like your mother, never doing as you're told!"  
The minute the words are out of her mouth she closes her eyes in regret and as she goes to apologise but Jason turns on her

"What the _hell_ did you just say?"

"Jason…I'm sorry …"

"I asked you what the _HELL_ did you just say to him?"

"Son… I'm sorry .. I didn't mean it like that.. but…. Jason he needs some discipline.. he needs his father"

"He's fine .. He's just lost his mother he doesn't need me telling him what to do .. look where that got her!"

"Jason... Son! .. For god sake. Jason how many times what happened to her was NOT your fault .. and letting him do what ever he wants .. is not helping anyone, especially him" she shakes her head and sighs "Jason you need to take some control here. You need to go back to work!"

"And what if I don't?"

Linda's exasperated now these past weeks have been hell and she's tired

"you know what .. I'd been invited on a trip to Vegas with a friend.. I wasn't going to go; the way things are here but… you know what .. I am gonna go. You need to get out of this pity party you're in and start being a Father to this child again …he needs you … and you need him,  
let alone Mikey and Emma! Have you even called them in the last few weeks?"

Jason bites his lip as Linda hands the still crying Jaycee to him "Sort yourself out son… or I may not come back!"

He gulps and looks at Jaycee he rubs his head and feels the small bump on it.  
He holds him close and breathes in the smell from his hair. Closing his eyes, feeling the warmth of the child against him.  
"I'm sorry .. I'm so sorry .." he looks up at the ceiling "CJ… I'm sorry!"

He takes a moment just thinking and settling Jaycee. As he hears the click of the mailbox outside he looks up.

"Hey Jaycee.." he turns him round and looks at him "you wanna get the mail?...Yeah?" he smiles, and Jaycee smiles back at him.  
He watches his expression and right there he can see CJ in that smile. He bites lip and pushes his feelings back down inside him as he carries him on his hip out to the mailbox

"you wanna open it?"

Jaycee smiles again as he pulls out the mail. "What we got there? Daddy have a look"  
Jason looks at it there some junk mail and some bills and small padded envelope he doesn't recognise

As they turn to go back to the house a jogger runs past them and Jaycee puts his hand up calling out "Mommy!"

"What?"  
Jason frowns as the little boy points to the jogger with long dark hair  
"mommy!"

Jason swallows hard as he watches her run down the street. Taking a deep breath as she does indeed look like CJ  
 _"shit"_ his eyes start to well and he gulps "No!.. No, it's not mommy" he kisses Jaycees head "come on let's get you some ice cream"

Jason lays the mail on the coffee table and takes Jaycee to the kitchen. He fills the bowl with ice cream as Linda comes to the doorway with her suitcase.  
She watches as Jason's stood at the kitchen counter crying

"Son?" she frowns

"I'm okay .. Just.. just enjoy your trip….Mom"

"Oh son… I won't go if you need me here?" She puts her case down

"No .. No ..you're right… I have to work the problem myself… get back on track… you go .. you deserve it. We'll be fine"

"if you need me you call. I'll be on the next flight back"  
she smiles and kisses Jaycee "grandma be back soon .. love you .. both of you" she puts her hand on Jason's shoulder "son let your team help you… They're hurting at you not letting them in!"

He nods "I'll see ya when ya get back!"

Jason takes a beer from the fridge and slumps back down on the couch. He turns the cartoon channel on for Jaycee as he sits him beside him. He picks the mail up from the coffee table and starts to open it.

Jaycee's back jumping on the couch again. Jason looks at him  
" Jaycee … No! get down … you'll hurt yourself.. come on watch the TV with Daddy!"

The little boy jumps again taking no notice "Jaycee what did I say?. … Do as you're told… you'll hurt yourself"

As Jaycee turns ready to do it again he looks Jason full in the face and right there, right there in that moment he can see CJ looking at him.  
He shakes his head and lets out a long deep sigh "oh god.. what am I gonna do with you" he smiles "Right come here!... now sit down!"  
Jason shakes his head and closes his eyes leaning his head back, he smiles "Yeah that's right, you're your mommy's son that's for sure" he laughs

He opens the jiffy bag envelope and a small key falls out onto the floor. Inside is a letter and small flash drive

"What the fuck?" he frowns as he picks the key up and looks at it. He certainly doesn't recognise it and it has no markings only an indented number 199

He looks at the letter and as he unfolds it he recognises CJ's handwriting  
"what the hell is this?"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay slumps back down in the chair. He's not tired now so he grabs a beer from the fridge and flicks the TV channels. He sighs as he feels so much calmer now and as he listens to Sonny snoring he smiles

He picks up the small padded envelope and using the scissors opens it. A small key falls out followed by another with a key tag on it and a white folded paper that looks like a letter  
"What the hell?" he frowns

He looks at the small key with no tag. He has no idea what it is it only has a number 199 stamped on the side.  
The other key he recognises, it's the key to the motel room that he and C.J use to stay at. He turns it over in his hand, smiling and feeling it bringing back all those memories.

"What the hell?" he unwraps the letter it just has the words 'I'm sorry!' written on it. He deepens his frown at the black and white photo wrapped inside it

"What the fuck?" He's confused as he looks at what appears to be a baby scan photo.  
He sits forward on the seat looking at it in the light of the TV and lets out a long deep sigh. He swallows hard trying to make some sense as he looks at the keys and the photo

" What the hell CJ ?" he rubs his head as he looks up to see Sonny's standing over him

"You alright?" Sonny asks seeing the look on his face "you look like you've seen a ghost?"

"Errrm…. I'm not sure!"

"Why what's wrong?" Sonny now frowns "What's that you got there?"

Clay gulps and holds out the photo for him to look "I'm confused!...I have no idea what this is?"

"Where the hell you get this?"

"It arrived in the mail .. Sonny I don't understand"

Sonny looks at him "When did this come?"

"I don't know… it went to my apartment … but it's got no mail mark. It looks like CJs handwriting.. and it's definitely her key…." Clay frowns again "… I really don't understand what this is about. Who the hell would have sent this? "

Sonny rubs his head and bites his lip as he looks at the photo.

He takes a deep breath and closes his eyes  
"Oh lord!"


	62. Chapter 62

**Chapter 62: does one of you want to explain**

"Phewww!"  
Sonny rubs his face and pours his coffee. Sniffing loudly he sits down on the couch and puts his feet up on the table while he's eating his cereal

He can hear the water running in the bathroom as Clay's in the shower.

While he continues eating he notices the padded envelope and keys on the table beside his feet. Checking the bathroom door and that Clay's still showering he sits forward and slides the envelope and contents round so he can see it now in the daylight.

He picks the photo and letter up and frowns "What the fuck were you up to? "

His frown lines deepen as he studies the picture he notices though it's a real photo some of the details from the side of the scan have been cut off

He chews his cereal when a sudden knock at the door jolts him back to reality  
"shit!" He tips the milk down his front "dammit!...errrm….. just give me a minute" he grabs a towel and wipes his chin

As he opens the door Lisa leaps forward jumping on him. It catches him off guard and she nearly knocks him over  
"HEY! …Shit.. Lisa!"

"Oh sorry!" she smiles a big huge beaming smile "did you miss me?"

"Hell yeah! What the hell are you doing here? I didn't think you were due back till tomorrow?"

"Wanted to surprise you…. " she kisses him and smiles "So we alone?"

"Errrrmm!..."

Clay comes to the bathroom doorway wrapped only in a small towel

"oh, Hey Lisa.. wasn't expecting you back today?" he smiles

"Oh sorry!" she nods to Sonny "Just thought I'd surprise ya" she smiles

He looks at Sonny "Look I can get out your hair … go somewhere let you two have some alone time?"

"No!..no! we got plenty time to catch up" she looks up, smiling at Sonny

"Well if he's offering?... you know? We should take him up on it? don'tcha think?" Sonny shrugs

"No Sonny we're fine… you'll have to wait" she slaps him on the chest and winks

"I can? .. Oh yeah….Yeah I guess I'll have to then!" she sighs and looks at Clay "Hey Lisa, you want some coffee? I just brewed some."

"Yeah be good" she smiles  
"so how are you both?" She looks around the room at all the mess "see you've missed me !"

"Ahhhh!.. errm… yeah well we were gonna clean up .. we thought you were back tomorrow though!"

"Right!... yeah I'm sure you were" she looks at Clay as he gets some Juice " so how's things?"

Clay nods "yeah good"

"The funeral .. how did that go?"

"Yeah …" he looks at Sonny " it was okay"

"And Jason? How's he doing now?"

Sonny looks at her "not good .. he's still not come back to BRAVO yet.. and errrmm...he's still shutting himself out ..Ray keeps trying .. going round taking Jaycee out with the kids but …he says he's just sits watching TV.. I don't know Lisa .. god knows we've tried" he shakes head and sighs as they all look at each

She sighs "So anyway…. what you two been up to?"

"Oh, errrrm us …" Clay looks a Sonny wondering what he's told her "you know just hanging out.. watching TV, baking cookies stuff like that" Clay laughs

"Right!" she smiles "so no parties or stripper clubs then?" her eyes divert to the discarded wrist bands she can see under the table

Sonny sees what she's looking at "Errrm us….. errmm…No!..We not been out really…Have we Clay?"

"No!...errrrm…just hanging out here at the apartment!"

"Sure…" she frowns "… just hanging out?"

Sonny stands her coffee on the table and as she leans forward to take the cup she frowns  
"What this?" she picks up the scan photo thats laid where Sonny left it

"Oh!... errrm… that!..." Clay shoots a panicked look at Sonny "… it's nothing!"

Sonny looks at Clay as Clay takes it off her "errm… no it's nothing" he smiles awkwardly

"Nothing?...right, so two guys just happen to have a baby scan picture, randomly on their coffee table? Yeah?" she frowns "Clay?...What's going on?" she waits but no explanation is offered "Clay, did you get someone pregnant?..…for god sake who? Sonny never even said you were seeing someone!"

"NO! No ..it's nothing like that"

She looks up at Sonny "Sonny?" she frowns

"HELL NO! No NO! it's not mine! … Lisa never.. errr err.. NO! it's his!"

"It's Clay's?… Okay so one of you wanna explain then?"

"Not really.." he sighs

"OK!..." she looks at them both and bites her lip "well I'm gonna wait for an explanation!"  
she sees the envelope and keys "So who's gonna tell me whats going on?"

Sonny close his eyes

Clay bites his lip "I don't know!" he sees her frown at him "that's the truth … I got sent this stuff in the mail… I don't know where it came from…. just these two keys and this photo in this envelope"

"I'm confused …Who's baby is it?"

"I'm not sure…" he sighs

"Clay?...someone just…randomly sends you a scan in the mail?"

"No!...It came with this letter" he hands it to her "that's all I know"

"I'm sorry? I don't get it?...Do you know who wrote this?"

" yeah …yeah I think so…"he looks at Sonny who's shaking his head " errm.. I think it was CJ!"

"What the hell?" Lisa sits up and looks at Sonny who shrugs and closes his eyes "how can it be her?"

" I'm guessing she wrote it before everything happened" Clay shrugs

"So, why's she sent this to you? and why now?"

"I have no idea .. I really don't" he sits and rubs his hand through his hair

"Wait … No, it can't be… you had Jaycee tested Right? I mean" she again looks at Sonny who's looking away shaking his head. He really wants no part in any of these theories "I thought Jason did too?... so, this … this is not him?"

"Yeah…. Yeah I did … you know I did….. I mean I know it was a home test and they're not always accurate but… I think Jason had his done properly"  
He looks at Sonny "No it can't be Jaycee… it can't be I mean you'd have to fix the test … there's no way! and she told me .. she told me he wasn't"

"Oh, geez why are we even going here?..." Sonny goes the kitchen with his back to them

Lisa looks around at him and then back at Clay "So what then ?...why send you this?"

Sonny sighs and looks at the ceiling before turning back to face them

"Sonny?" Lisa frowns.. "do you know more about this ?"

" I wish the hell I knew nothing about this .. I wish the hell whoever sent this never did! Look .." he sighs "the only thing I can think is it's … its" he lets out a long sigh " .. you know maybe…." He shrugs "what we talked about that time…?"

She closes her eyes " so you think …?"

"oh, I don't know what the Hell I think….. I think we should just forget about it is what I think "

Clay frowns "what?.. what thing you talked about?"

Sonny lets out a deep sigh again and paces the room

"Sonny talk to me man"

"SHIT!...Okay... When CJ was pregnant again .. me and Lisa we….we just wondered….like only for a minute man … you know …. If maybe it wasn't Jason's" he shakes his head "Jesus…. We need this like a hole in the head!" he sighs  
"Look man,...Jason seemed convinced and she never indicated it wasn't so…there was no reason to assume different!"

Clay sits quiet looking at the scan then he smiles and shake his head " I knew it… I knew … damn it! ...Ahhh Shit!" Clay sighs "... I knew she was lying .. I asked her, at the hospital and she said No, but… I just knew there was something… shit! I should have … I should have pushed it further!"

"Look man we don't know for sure okay?... lets just leave it like that .. its gonna do no good now opening these wounds up … Hell man Jason can't take any more .. just let it lie Clay for your good as well as his!"

"But… if that was my baby not his?"

"And what?...What the hell good is it gonna do now, Clay?... They're both gone… just let it go!" Sonny closes his eyes "SHIT! we don't need this"

Sonny shakes his head exasperated by it all "All you're gonna do if you mention this is cause trouble … trouble Bravo doesn't need… hell they're already considering looking for a new B1 if Jason doesn't start getting his act together . ..you wanna make that happen? .. cos I sure as hell don't!"

Lisa tries to calm them " hey … let's not act hasty here Okay? … Sonny's right. For now, it won't do any good to bring it up …. Lets just let everything settle down… till you know any more!... Do you know what the keys are?"

"No! .. well…errm …yeah this one I do! It's the errrm….. motel room we use to stay at .. we stayed there quite a bit… God the times we've had in that room!" he smiles

Sonny looks at Lisa and shakes his head "shit!"

"Good times?" Lisa smiles "you know maybe that's what she sent it for .. to remind you of good times .. to think of her like that?.. not to cause trouble "

"Yeah right!" Sonny says under his breath as he rolls his eyes "Cause she was never one to cause trouble!... Hell No!.. That wouldn't be her at all. _Even when she's dead!_ "

Lisa looks at him and frowns "Sonny!... Okay so what's this one?"

"That one I have no idea" Clay frowns and looks at it in his hand " I haven't a clue what it fits or why she'd send it to me?"

"Looks like jewellery box or padlock?" Lisa takes it from his hand and looks at the number "199?" she frowns "does that mean anything ?... Hey, you don't think it's a security box. I mean they're numbered?"

"Security box … yeah sure .. but for where?" he frowns

"I don't know … I mean it's gotta be somewhere she thinks you'll know? Right?... anywhere you went that might have one?"

Clay shakes his head "No!...no idea…" He frowns

"Look maybe .. its best if we don't go looking for it .. I mean whatever she was into … maybe its best left alone… those guys who came after her before … do you really wanna bring that kinda trouble…. Have we not had enough of that already?" Sonny shakes his head "Just I don't think we need to be chasing ghosts!"

Clay nods " Yeah you might be right…" he sighs "Look errrmm .. I'm gonna get dressed.. give you two some space!"

Lisa nods "Hey let's go get some drinks!"

"Yeah okay!" Clay smiles and looks at Sonny "you wanna call the others?"

" Yeah sure! why not... get out of here and forget about all this nonsense"  
Sonny's feeling apprehensive he knows Clay too well and he know despite what he says there's no way in Hell Clay's gonna just leave this alone.

Lisa looks at Sonny "you gonna call Jason as well?"

Sonny looks at Clay and bites his lip "Nah! I don't think he'll come!"

"Sonny you can't just not invite him … look let me call .. tell him I'm back in town " she smiles

"Yeah! yeah that's a good idea .. he might go for it if you ask!"

Clay smiles "I'll just get dressed!"

"Hey Clay .. I think its best if we don't mention that envelope to anyone… keep it between us a least for now!"

Clay nods. "I'll get dressed!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They head out to the bar

They're getting drinks in and playing pool when Ray walks in with Jason. They all look at each other and raise their eyes in surprise

Sonny lets out a big sigh and whispers to Clay "he looks like shit!"

"Yeah he doesn't look good I have to admit" Clay frowns and looks at Trent who raises his eyes "But errrm he's up and walking which is a start. According to Ray he's been horizontal in front of TV most of the time!"

"Jason! .. about fucking time man " Sonny smiles and hits him on the back.

They look each other in the eyes "Good to have you back Brother!.. so, when you getting your ass back to bravo?...You know we've had enough of dealing with cake eaters, no offence Davis, but we need you back taking the heat off our ass's" he laughs.

Jason laughs too "yeah I'll be back soon!"

Clay picks up a beer and hands to Jason "You coming back?" Clay frowns "seriously … we missed you man!"

"Yeah l.. errrmm …I'm getting myself together… I got no choice.. . Jaycee driving me insane … he's like a complete handful right now" he laughs

Sonny laughs "Guess he takes after someone we know"

Jason smiles " Yeah he sure as hell does" 

Sonny looks at him and drinks his beer "Yeah … well good luck with that! where is he anyway?"

Ray picks up a beer "He's fine he's with Naima!... She's looking after him"

"Hey sonny!... I only came out cos they told me you were buying .. so, where's mine?"

"Ha ha funny!...Okay next round is on me…Jesus its not like I never pay for drinks"

Trent looks at Clay " errrm like Sonny, when do you ever pay for the drinks?"

"I do?...sometimes… occasionally... I do?"

Trent frowns "Yeah right!"

They all laugh

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sonny and Ray stand by the jukebox watching Jason at the bar where he's standing with Clay  
"You need to take him home, Ray!... Think he's had more than enough for tonight"

"Yeah .. I was just thinking the same thing"

"been good to see him out but…. think this could get out of hand!"

"yeah … we'll just finish this up then I'll take him!.. Just going bathroom be right back!"

Sonny stands on his own just watching Clay and Jason at the bar

"Hey Cowboy…. What ya doing?"

"Oh, I'm just keeping an eye on things"

"You worried about something Sonny?"

"Yeah … you could say that!"

Lisa turns to look at what Sonny's watching then she looks back at Sonny who raises his eyes  
"You know, Lisa, as sure as bears poop in the woods Clay's not gonna damn well leave this… Shit!" he sighs

She looks up at him and puts her hand on his arm "It'll be okay… I'm sure Clay won't do anything stupid"

Sonny drinks his beer "hmmm! I hope to god you're right!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay's stood next to Jason at the bar

"Two Double whiskeys" Jason indicates to the barman with his fingers

"Hey man I'm okay with the beer"

Jason looks at him and doesn't say a word as he necks one of the Whiskey's back and pushed the other to the side "same again!"

Clay frowns "hey man what's going on … perhaps you've had enough for today?" Clay's worried now

As Jason repeats the process "One for me , one for her!"

"Jason come on man …" Clay sighs "I know you miss her …we all do .. but this?"

"you know she could always match me … no matter how many drinks "He laughs

"Yeah I know man!" Clay laughs "she always said it was one of her talents… drinking!"

Jason turns and glares at him "Yeah right!... what cos you fucked her you think you knew her?... that's what you think?" Jason frowns at him trying to focus in his drunken state

"Hey Jason.. there's no need for … I .. I didn't mean nothing by it … I .."

"You knew nothing" he pokes Clay in the chest "You knew nothing about her at all…. Hell, I knew her .. I knew her inside out and I couldn't do anything to save her!...you know her brother shouldn't have... " he rubs his head "shouldn't have done what he did!... two more Whiskeys!"

Clay swallows hard "Jason I think you've had enough… come on man… why don't we get you home!"

"Get your hands off me… don't _you EVER_ tell me anything about her… _you_ don't know anything about her "

Clay bites his tongue but Jason's arrogant attitude is getting to him "You know… for your information… we are about more than just sex… there was more than that… I cared about her… I.. I ..." Clays emotions are building inside " and she..."

"and she what?... cared about you? Hell, she did… she cared about herself….and...and she cared about her son… " Jason screws his face up " .. and I wouldn't let her see him…. " he shakes his head " You know .. I should have cared more about her, should have seen where she was at … shit!what the hell did I do" he rubs his head "but you... you don't know anything!"

Clay closes his eyes he's trying hard not to lose his temper as Jason continues

"Me and her….. was a different level…. it was …" Jason closes his eyes "it was so intense .. too much!..oh God dammit!... you know Clay" he pauses and holds his breath "he hurts so damn much!"  
he necks the next whiskey back and closes his eyes as they fill with tears

Clay watches him "you don't know everything, ... I mean about me and her .. what went on!"

"Oh, don't I? well I don't need to … " he swallows down his emotions "we had a child together that's all that matters now...in fact two.. Oh God!" Jason takes a deep breath "that's where we differ …we could've had a life and a family!"

Clay's about to say something when Sonny hits him on the back  
"Hey there!...this is looking a bit deep for night out drinking?" he glares at Clay "why don't we lighten the mood?!"

Clay bites his lip realising perhaps this isn't the place or time "Yeah sure!... I just need to use the bathroom!"

"You know I think I'm gonna head back!" Jason fumbles for his truck keys which Ray takes from his hand

" I don't think so … look why don't I take you back? Come on Naima will be wondering where we are? I'm already going to be getting in trouble.. have you seen the time?" he laughs

"Yeah come on blondie we'll go and play pool!... Take your mind off _things_. Think everyone has had more than enough drink for tonight!" he shakes his head at Clay as he leads him away  
"What in gods name were you thinking there Clay?"

"What?"

"You know damn well what!.. I heard what you said ... you were gonna tell him… about that photo?... Shit Clay!... I damn well asked you not to … you just wanna bring trouble… Have you seen the state of him? Jesus .. I thought you were intelligent " he sighs " you do this … and me you .. we'll be done… you get me?"

"Do what?"

Sonny grinds his teeth "You know full well what Clay!... Now we agreed to leave this!"

"No, you said leave it … I never agreed anything!"

Clay grabs his jacket

"Hey Blondie … where the hell you going?"

"Home… I need to do some thinking … perhaps you could stay at Lisa's tonight I mean you being the expert on doing the right thing!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o 

Ray dumps Jason down on the couch

"Shit Ray!.. How much has he had?" Naima reaches for a blanket from the back of the chair

Ray sighs "more than enough!"

"What you gonna do with him?"

"I don't know.. he'll have to stay here for tonight .. Linda's not there and … I don't wanna leave him on his own!"

"No! no he can't be on his own" she kisses Ray "Jaycee's asleep anyway.. you know he's becoming a handful.. we need to get Jason back.. for everyone!"

Ray lets out a deep long sigh "How the hell do I do that?"

"you'll find a way" she smiles and kisses him, as they both look at the drunken Jason who's fast asleep on their couch "I have faith in you Ray Perry .. this will come right!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o 

Clay lays on top of the bed with the light still on he hasn't got undressed yet

He closes his eyes "Shit!"

He lets out a long sigh thinking about tonight. Thinking how close he came to saying something. Thinking over if it's right or wrong to say anything

He lays on his back with his eyes closed as she puts her lips on his and he smiles as he touches her skin. It's so soft but he can still feel the strength in her arms.  
He's running his hand down the curve of her back as she kisses him..that strong but soft kissing her wanting him. Then suddenly she's snatched away.  
"No please…. leave her!" He can hear her scream in pain as he's trying desperately to reach her. He can see her there on the floor, but he's not able to reach her  
" NO! " he can feel himself being dragged further away "NO! No!... Nooooo!... Please!"

He sits up with a start  
"SHIT!... Phewwww!" Hes' sweating "Oh god!" he runs his hands through his hair as he takes a moment getting himself together  
" Oh shit! Geez .". he rubs his head and sits up on the bed.

Taking a moment, he gets up and heads out into the quiet of the lounge "Sonny? You here man?" There's no answer "Guess he went to Lisa's"

He looks at his phone its 2am "Shit!" he sits on the couch and looks at the photo and keys laid on the table "Oh CJ … What the hell is this supposed to mean?" he sighs

He picks up the motel key in his hand and leans back on the couch dangling it on the end of his finger smiling, thinking about those nights, and days, in that motel room.  
He smiles, then the smile drops as he remembers the day she made him take Jaycee from her. The sound of her crying outside that room as she left. He closes his eyes as they well with tears.

Suddenly he opens his eyes  
" SHIT! …Oh my god!" He sits up. "Oh.. my ..god!"

He picks up the keys and his jacket and heads out the door


	63. Chapter 63

Stood in the parking lot Clay looks up towards the second floor. He can just make out the door hidden by the railing. Taking a breath, he heads to the motel reception.

The large overweight guy sitting behind the reception is leaned back in a black leather swivel chair. Surrounded by a heavy metal grill security cage he has his feet up on the desk. He's looking up, watching the small TV on the shelf in the corner. It takes time for Clay to get his full attention. "You want a room? Fifty bucks..." he speaks without even turning around.

"Yeah sure. By any chance is 217 available?"

The guy frowns. Letting out a long sigh he turns his chair so he's now looking at Clay. It's rare to get asked a question like this and he stares questioning "You wanna specific room?"

"Yeah ..please"

First checking the key peg board the guy takes the key from the hook. He stares at Clay through the grill something about Clay seems vaguely familiar but he's not sure what. "Do I know you?"

"No, I don't think so." Clay smiles "Fifty?..." Clay confirms as he opens his wallet.

"Yeah..." He hands over the key, he brow furrows . Clay 's not his normal client, the fact he's on his own. He takes the money and Clay takes the key. A key he has a copy of in his pocket.

"Thanks...excuse me .." The guy having already turned his attention back to the TV doesn't register Clay's question immediately  
"Yeah, what now?"  
"The rooms, do they have a safety deposit box?"  
"What?" the guy turns and looks at Clay "Yeah...yeah, they do. Anything else?" he sighs annoyed wanting to get back to the basketball game.

"No, thanks that's great" Clay turns to leave. As he gets to the outer door the guy calls him back  
"Hey you, if you need to use the deposit box, then you need to take room 215... 217 the box don't work. The key's missin'. I never bothered to replace it cos ...if I'm bein' honsest you the first to ever asked about it."

"Wait, the key's missing?" Clay smiles.

"Yeah... here take 215 that one works . Though the tap leaks. I need to get it fixed"  
"No, it's fine. I'll stick with this one Thanks"  
"Look you either want the box or you don't, make up your mind."  
"No. It's fine, thanks."  
"Jeez , you people..." he cracks open another beer, forgetting Clay, goes back to his TV viewing

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Clay unlocks the door. Taking a deep nervous breath as he steps inside. Switching on the light, he looks around at the quiet undisturbed room. Taking a moment, just sitting on the edge of the bed, it's late and rubs at his tired head. Looking at the keys as he takes them from his pocket, so many thoughts filling his mind.

He smiles. Thinking about CJ, about her sitting on this bed. Crossed legged in his tee-shirt, eating pizza and as always, drinking beer. He laughs. Remembering when they first meet, the mess from the takeaway cartons as they accumulated on the floor.

Closing his eyes, laying back on the bed he can't stop his vivid thoughts. Her, here, taking control. How sexy she could be and yet at the same time so vulnerable.

Sitting up and he smiles. Reminiscing about all those moments "Oh CJ... I miss you so much!"

He takes a deep breath as his cell phone vibrates. Taking it from his pocket he answers "Sonny...hey!"

"Clay..." he pauses the tone of his voice sounds strange "you okay? Look um...I couldn't sleep, you know after what happened at the bar..."

"Hey look, don't worry about it. It's forgotten"

"Alright but look I ... I just.. well I just wanted to say sorry, for what I said. I know you're hurting man just.. "

"It's fine Sonny. We're good. Things just got a little crazy but it's all good. Look, I know you're right.. I need think things through. Like you said it's not gonna do any good opening it all up while Jason's the way he is."

"Okay. Well as long as we're good. I just wanted to check on ya, man."

"Yeah we're good. Sonny get back to Lisa, you got some catching up to do!" He laughs trying to end the call. Sonny laughing too.

"Yeah well we've done quite a bit of that already. Could do with the break. Hey man, were you asleep?"

"No...no, I'm fine, don't worry about me. I'll speak to you tomorrow"

"Okay! And listen you want anything; you just call me. I always got ya six"

"Yeah sure man. And Sonny... thanks, for everything" ending the call Clay sighs. "Right, so where are you then?" He starts to search the room, looking for the deposit box. Though he'd never noticed it before when he'd stayed here it was easily found. Located just inside the bedside cabinet . The heavy, metallic box sits there. The number 199 printed on a small disc on the front. "Okay..." Clay sighs. taking the key from his pocket. "Let's see what you're hiding, shall we"

He frowns, concerned as he puts his key in, now noticing it has two locks. He takes his key out now putting it in the other lock and turning again. It still won't open, and Clay knows it's probably because it needs two keys simultaneously turned. He sighs thinking what to do. First trying to force the door then the box itself from the cupboard.

"Shit!..." he pulls at it hard. It won't budge. Frustrated he tries again with the key. Now pulling and turning at the same time, nothing happens. He even tries to see if the room key will fit. "Dammit! So, where the hell's the other key, CJ?" He thinks. Wondering if maybe he left it in the envelope. That maybe _it was stuck inside, and I didn't see ?_

Laying himself back on the bed he works out his next move. Closing his eyes as he does. Then falling asleep.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason wakes. Sitting up on couch. Exactly where he fell into the drunken sleep when Ray brought him back.

"Good morning!" Naima smiles at him as she hands him the freshly brewed coffee.

"Oh, hey thanks! How the hell' d I get here?"

"Ray. He brought you home with him, lasts night. What, you don't remember?"

"Oh brother, how you doin'?" Ray's showered and now making himself something to eat for breakfast.

"Ray, leave some for Jason too!" Naima smacking his hand away, making him drop the toast. Ray frowns and she smiles "He's our guest!"

Jason rubs his head again, sighing. "You know what... I feel like shit!"

"Why don't you go get a shower. Naima can fix you some of _my_ breakfast!" he laughs and kissing her head.

"No, I should head off. I need to get cleaned up" He smiles watching as his son now wanders through. He's carrying a lidded cup with some milk. Frustrated, trying hard to open the lid he starts to cry. "Hey, come here you." Jason calls to him. Watching as he still determinedly pulls at the lid. "No Jaycee don't do that. You'll spill it!"

He stands still, looking at Jason and then defiantly continues to pull at the lid "Jaycee... I told you, don't do that!" he sighs. The little boy still staring, still pulling at the lid " Oh do what the hell you!"

Naima looks at Ray and frowns pushing him forward. "Jaycee, give the cup to me"  
Ray puts his hand out, taking the beaker from his hand. Jaycee screams , crying. Ray crouching down in front of him, Ray tells him off "NO! Now you were told to stop doing that! "stop!"  
Jason sighs watching. Naima now distracting him, leading him away to the kitchen

"Jace... " Ray sighs "he's not her, brother. And you can't just keep lettin' him do as he wants because you're blamin' yourself for something that's not your fault!"

"It's not my fault Ray? Then who's fault is it? Hmmm, tell me!"

"Jason, what happened, it's no one's fault. No one is to blame. It.. it just happened that way. You were trying to help her, but she didn't wanna be helped. Simple as that. You have to start to move forward!"

"Yeah, but Ray, I knew ...I knew pushing her like that, she was gonna kick back. I saw it last time, hell even her brother knew what might happen" he sighs "Ray I just never seen her that out of control ... it's like she was someone else, erratic, paranoid about everything"

"Yeah but brother, that's no one's fault. Jason, she was ill. She needed help. " He stands up, looking straight at Jason "but this...with him. Letting him do what he wants. Cutting yourself off from BRAVO, from your brothers. That's gotta stop. You gotta get it together man, you have to take control!" Ray sighs long and frustrated. "Jason he needs you, to be strong for him. He's a child, he can't just do what he wants. What kinda person that gonna make him? You gonna turn him into her... so he won't listen. She wouldn't want that man."  
Ray looks at him as he takes a moment. Hesitating. Hoping that what he's saying is sinking in "You know I remember; CJ wasn't always that way. She was stronger than that, but something happened, and she snapped. I don't know what that was but that's not on you and the sooner you accept it, the sooner you can move forward!"

Ray looks at Naima, she smiles and nods giving him a look that tells him he's said the right things. Jason sitting quiet as Naima let's Jaycee go to him. He sits on Jason's lap his arms around his daddy's neck. Jason holding him tight. "You're right. This has gotta stop! I've gotta get back to work! I need to sort this problem out."

"Yeah man," Ray smiles "Do you know how good it is to hear you say that!"

As they both smile, Jaycee finally achieves his goal, pulling the lid off the cup, spilling the liquid contents down Jason's shirt. Ray laughs. Looking at Jason who smiles. He shakes his head. Cuddling his son close he sighs. "What the hell am I gonna do with you?"

It's just then that both their phones in unison start to bleep. Ray looks at Naima, frowning "Looks like I gotta go!"

Jason looks at his phone "It okay if I use your shower first?"

"Yeah sure man" Ray nods. He smiles looking him in the eye. "This mean you're coming back to work?"

Jason nods "Yeah if um... Naima doesn't mind babysitting? My mom isn't back 'til tomorrow"

"Of course,..." She smiles kissing Jason on the head "just go do your job! He'll be fine with me."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

Clay wakes. He doesn't even know how long he's been asleep. Making a quick check of his phone "Shit!..." He sits up and looks back at the open cupboard door with the deposit box. Rubbing his head, he sighs closing the cabinet door. Just as he does his phone vibrates in his pocket. "Oh shit...just what I don't need!"

He decides to shower in the motel and after he dresses he heads back to the reception. Handing the key back. There's a woman sitting there now behind the safety grill, filing her nails. She looks up at Clay "Hey honey" she smiles "What can I do for 'ya sugar?"

"Oh, I'm just bringing this key back. Um...hey you don't know the safety deposit boxes in the room; do they need two keys... to open them I mean?"

"Yeah" she frowns, blowing a bubble with her gum. Thinking about his question "Yeah, I think they do. I can't really remember. Why you gotta problem?"

"Would you have like a master key for them... if someone's lost one could you open it?"

"Nah! I think someone stole that years ago. Why? You need me to come look at your problem?" she smiles, grinning at Clay "This like one of them trick questions, you to get me in your room...cos hell honey you only gotta ask and I'll come to your damn room" she smiles again

"No um... no you're good. So, there's no way to get into a box if you don't have the keys?"

"Hey man was with twenty questions time? Look man .. most of them don't work or people lost the keys. It's a fifty-buck motel, not the Ritz Central. People who stay here generally use it by the hour. They don't have anything safe to keep ...you get me?" She sighs, shaking her head blowing and popping more gum bubbles. "Getting Santo, to get a toilet fixed is the biggest expense he'll make, then only if someone complains. Now there something more I can help you with or are we done?"

"No thanks, just handing the key back !" He smiles.

"You know I got a couple hours spare. Pretty boy like you if you wanna kill some time?" she smiles

"Sorry, no... "he holds his phone up " I gotta go to work"

"Shame!" she sniffs "Still your loss. Oh, hey pretty boy, hope you didn't leave nothing valuable in there before you lost the key?" she laughs

"Oh no, nothing. I was just curious" he smiles "Look thank.. I better go, like I said work!"

o-o-o-o-o-o -o

Blackburn begins his address to the briefing "Where's Senior Chief Perry?" he frowns, looking across the table at the faces peering back at him. s

"Dunno... " Sonny shrugs "though it's not like Ray to be late? You think I should call him, check he's okay ?"

Just as the words leave his mouth Ray walks in the door "Sorry we're late. Had to wait for someone to finish in the shower!" he smiles as Jason walks in behind him

Eric looks up giving a relieved grin "Master chief! I take it your presence means you're back to work?"

"Yeah... yeah I'm back!"

Blackburn smiles "Now take a seat, you're late!"

Jason laughs as they all look at each other. Mandy smiles, mouthing she's glad he's back.  
"Okay gentlemen... Ali Kuharik, number two with the new freedom fighter's movement. We are tasked with bringing him back to US soil. He may have information regarding the plot to bomb a US Nairobi consulate. We need him alive..."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

As the flight lands from a successful operation. Jason grabs Mandys arm holding her back as the others disembark the plane "Hey, I just wondered if you um...fancied some dinner?"

"Oh um...Jason, I'm sorry I can't I've gotta meet someone"

"It's just dinner. As friends, I just wanted to talk to someone about some things"

"Look, maybe another day okay? We can catch-up, I really do have to meet someone."

"Oh okay, yeah... yeah sure!" He smiles. Sighing as she walks away. He really could have done with a sounding board and some help. "Oh, hey Ray wait up...I just wanted to say, I'll be over to pick Jaycee up in a bit. I just need to make a couple of calls first"

"Okay, yeah sure. Is Linda back now?"

"Yeah .. yeah she should be later today."

"Okay well I'll see you in a while. Oh, and Jason, good to have you back man!" Ray smiles and pats him on the arm

"Yeah, it was good to be back!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Finding himself a quiet space in the office. Jason sits at the desk, staring into his lap at his phone. After a brief moment of reflection, he hits call. "Oh hi... is that Matt?"

"Yes it is. Who is this?"

"Um... it's Jason, Jason Hayes.. I .. " he swallows hard

"Jason?! Wow! Um... surprised. What can I do for you?"

"Can we meet? I need to talk to you. But is there any chance you can come to Virginia Beach?"

"Oh um... look, I'm not so sure that's a good idea, do you? It's been a while and I'm trying to put all that behind me now. Maybe it wouldn't be good to pick over old wounds. Both have some closure"

"Yeah um... see that's what I'm trying to do but ... there's something I need to speak to you about"

"I'm sorry. I can't. Like I said, I need to move on after everything!"

"Yeah, look I know what you're saying but CJ..." he pauses "Catherine, she asked me to call you. Said you could help me."

Matt laughs "Sorry what? Catherine asked you to call me. Jason what is this. You know if you need some proper help, I can recommend someone to talk to . I think I should go. I tell you what I'll text you a name of a therapist, she's close by. She's exceptionally good with grief counselling"

Jason hesitates, silent. Thinking carefully about what to say "I know this sounds crazy but it's not about me getting help, not like that. It's ...it's about the house and some other things"

Matt goes quiet. Thinking things over, confused "About the house? Jason, what house?"

"Her father's house. The house in Washington. Look, I didn't wanna do this on the phone, but I need you to find something in it and really do need to speak to you"

"Jason, I don't understand. What's going on? You know if it's about the house then you need to speak to Daniel, I think he's sorting it out. You do know she already cleared the house out, emptied it. Jason is this about your son getting the house because I think that's what she meant to happen with it. Though, between us, I do know Daniel's not happy about that."

"Shit..." Jason swallows "Then I really need to speak to you as soon as possible. Can you come?"

"Jason, what the hell is this? I told you I don't wanna get involved."

"Matt, she sent me a letter, after she died. I received a letter and like I said I need to speak to you" he sighs, rubbing his head frustrated. "She um... she told me not to involve her brother, Daniel. To not tell him about this." Matt's silent, he says nothing. "Matt ...Matt, are you still there?"

"Okay. Look, I'll um...make some arrangements I can probably get a flight later in the week if that's okay?"

"Yeah, yeah that's great. Just let me know when you get here."

"And Jason, that offer still stands. If you need someone to talk to, just ask"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Mandy smiles. Dressed in the large white bathrobe she switches out the light in the hotel bathroom. Thanking the hotel concierge as he wheels in the champagne "What's this about?"

"Champagne! I thought we'd celebrate."

"Yeah but why...why are you spoiling me? I mean first you surprise me turning up here, then this...this hotel. And now champagne?"

He wraps his arms tightly around her and kisses her neck. Untying the belt on the soft robe, putting his hand on her skin. "Mmmm!..." he kisses her again "What you don't want spoiling?"

"I do ... " She smiles "But Daniel why?"

"Does there have to be a reason?"

"Maybe?" she smiles. His hands smoothing their way over her curves. Griping at her butt, pulling her forward towards him

"Well, because I want you and I think I've waited long enough to tell you, properly I mean"  
He looks at her in the eyes "After Catherine, what happened, well I just don't wanna waste any more time" he sniffs as he lets her go and turns around, filling the two glasses on the tray with the bubbles "And I realize now how close, how close I came to losing you, in Mexico. And I don't want to do that again, lose you I mean. So ..." He takes the box from the trolley and dropping onto the floor "Mandy, marry me! Be my wife."

"What?" Mandy's taken by surprise standing there half naked in her open bathrobe looking at him on one knee on the floor "Daniel are you serious? Marry you?"

"Yeah...yeah I'm serious." he bites his lip "Mandy, I love you!"

"But we .. we hardly know each other"

"I know enough, crazy right. But I know how I feel, and I know I want to be with you, that I don't want to lose you. After losing my sister, I realized how precious time is. What you don't feel the same?"

" Yeah...yeah I do. It's not that ..." she smiles. Taking a deep breath as he takes the ring from the box. She frowns looking at it. Hesitating her brain thinking over his questions and then like a madness she grins "Yes!.." her voice is breathless and full of excitement "Yes, I'll marry you!"

He smiles. Grinning from ear to ear. Standing up he loosens the robe from her shoulders, taking it off her body and dropping it on to the floor. Looking at her naked, Beautiful. He takes hold of her hand, sliding the ring onto her finger. Then undoing his own robe, wrapping his hand in her hair he starts to kiss her. "Oh god Mandy, I want you so bad"

She smiles, looking at the stunning diamond ring on her finger. Groaning loudly, happy as he kisses her neck. Closing her eyes to his lustful touch "Oh god Daniel!" she sighs as he presses his body tightly against hers. She's so happy, tingling with excitement. Him pushing her gently back onto the bed. Clamoring needily between her legs to make love to her.

She can hear the sound of her cell phone ringing but wrapping her legs around his thighs holing him to her she ignores it.

The voice mail eventually clicks in and Jason starts to leave a message.  
 _"Mandy it's Jason. I really need to talk to you. Can you call me as soon as you get this? I need some help with something, it's really important. I need you to keep it between us though. Speak to you soon"_


	64. Chapter 64

Chapter 66: What does the key fit? Chapter Text

Sonny unlocks the apartment door "Shhh! Just hold on a minute." he smiles "Clay?... Clay, you here man? Shh!.. Clay" There's silence and he carries on pressing his lips against Lisa's "Mmmm.. come 'ere!" he smiles as he pulls her shirt over her head.  
"No, you come here!" she smiles undoing his pants dropping them to the floor as he unbuttons her jeans. "I just need the bathroom. Why don't you get me a beer, take it to the bedroom" she grins cheekily  
"Sure thing!" Sonny grabs two cold beers from the refrigerator and turning around he looks at Lisa in only her underwear.  
"Hey, you ready for the Texas Ranger?"

"No!" Clay laughs loudly standing in the open doorway of his bedroom.  
"Oh no!... oh my God! What the hell! Though you were out?"  
"Yeah I can see that!" he laughs again. Sonny frowns watching him. Tool bag in hand as he sees that Clay is standing there holding a tool bag "Look I'll get outta your hair. I've got somethings to do anyways."

"Such as what?" Sonny frowns a weird vibe surfaces like Clays up to something "Where you goin' with that? Okay Clay, wass goin' on?"

"Nothing!"

Lisa's back from the bathroom where she's covered herself with her shirt "So, what's goin' on?" she frowns

"I don't rightly know but blondie here's about to tell us, right?"

"Look um… I found what this key fits. Its just um…well I need another key; one I don't have. So, I'm gonna get the box and bring it back. See if I can get it open another way"

"Clay.. what the hell?" Sonny frowns looking at him. He can see the steely look on his face he knows Clays already made up his mind, there won't be any changing it "Right fine!" Sonny grabs up his pants, pulling them on. "Then I'm comin' with you"

"Sonny, no wait… what are you doin' man? I don't think that's a good idea. If we get caught…"

"I don't care what you think. So, best you show me what this is all about…right?"

"Okay.. " Clay sighs "yeah alright!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Arriving at the motel, Clay having explained on the drive here Sonny frowns as he steps from the truck "Which room? "

"217"

"And you got the key?"

"Yeah but….. look maybe I should check in, so we don't get disturbed?"

"Oh, c'mon Clay, we're not gonna be that long. We got this. Hell, we're SEALS, we breach doors every day. We're not gonna get caught breaking into a cheap motel. With a key." He laughs

"No, I guess you're right Let's just get it done"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

As they enter the room. Sonny takes a breath as he stares at the bed. The last time he came here, CJ was passed out, right there. And now he has vision in his head of her lying there, them thinking she was dead. He laughs remembering how he hit her head on the door frame on the way out. Shit!

"What?" Clay frowns looking at him. "You okay?"

"Yeah… it's nothin'. Just rememberin' the last time I was here .. .Jeez, there was always some kinda trouble with her…" He sighs " so, okay where is this thing?"

Clay opens the cabinet door wide and Sonny pulls at the security box. "It's bolted down I say the quickest way … we take the bottom of the unit out?"

"Okay!.. yeah sure!"

They get their tools and set up. "Shhhh! You hear that?" He frowns turning the flashlight of as they hear voices on the landing outside. After a few moments, the giggles and talking stops and the people pass by. "Okay, let's get this done and get outta here!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Back at the apartment Clay sets the box on the table. The wooden base to the cabinet is still attached.

"Now what?" Sonny looks at Clay wondering what he wants to do.

"I dunno, I guess I try and find the other key? Maybe we get it open some other way?"  
"You know what, let's give it some thought for tonight. See if we can find the key in the morning. That's gonna need a specialist bit to drill it open."

"Hey!... "Lisa frowns as he she comes from the bedroom where she's been sleeping " So, what's going on?" h

"Blondie here has the bright idea to open this box. He thinks, whatever the reason she sent him the key, the answer is in here!"

"Really?... So, can you open it?"

"Not yet, but we will!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

Jason's at the bar "Another whiskey…" he looks around and over his shoulder he sees Mandy heading towards him. ".. and gin and tonic "Hey…" He smiles greeting her " you look good! I ordered you a drink!"

She kisses his cheek " Thanks. Have to say you're looking better than you have in a long time" she smiles

"Yeah! Yeah, I'm getting there slowly. "

"Well I hear Jaycee's being a handful for you?" she laughs

"Yeah. He's that age … you know… kids!"

"No! No, I don't actually but I'll take your word for it" she smiles and takes a drink from the glass the barman sets in front of her "So what did you want, to talk to me about?"

"Look, can we talk over there?"

"Yeah sure"

They sit, choosing the booth in the corner. Him taking a deep breath and another sip from his glasses. "Look I trust you okay and there's somethings I need some help with."

Mandy frowns "Okay. Sure. Jason you know you can trust me. Always. So, what is it?"

"Yeah I know" he smiles and drinks some more "Look um… CJ, she … well she sent me some things. In the mail. And…well um…I need your help with them" he pauses deep in thought, concerned about telling her. Concerned he might sound crazy.

"Wait, CJ sent you something?" she frowns "Such as what?"

He hesitates for a moment more, nervously looking around "A um… a flash-drive and a key." He takes them out of his pocked and shows her.

"A key?" She frowns "A key to what?"

"I don't know.… not yet. But whatever this fit, then I think .. it might contain be the way to open that flash drive. I think she sent me that list. The one from before. The names." he swallows hard before sipping more of his whiskey. His hand shaking.  
Mandy frowns. She too is concerned about him opening all this back up. "I thought that's why she went back to Washington. I thought she handed this thing over. Jason …I don't understand. Are you sure?"

"No, I'm not sure. I don't know anythin' anymore. I don't know where any of this lead, and that scares me. I need to find out what this key fits. But what I need you to do is find out what I do with that list, when I get it. Mandy I need to keep my kids safe." he leans in hushing his voice "There's a lot more to this. She um… she wrote me a letter. But just for now, all I'm interested in is keeping my family safe. I don't care about the rest of it. " he gives a long sigh and sits back in his seat, drinking. Mandy placing her hand reassuringly on his arm.

"Jason you know I'm here for you and I'll do whatever I can for you, and the kids, always. You know that." She smiles. Him looking her in the eyes.  
"Yeah I know. You've always been a good friend but you , well you know you've always been much more than that, I …"

"Jason, don't! " she interrupts him "Look, we've been here before. Me and you , it doesn't work…" she sighs.

He looks down at his glass, nodding and as he looks at her hand resting on his arm, he notices the ring on her finger "What the hell's that?"

"Oh um… that's what I came here for. To tell you about. I um... well… I guess I got engaged!" she smiles

"Sorry what?" Jason frowns "You _did_ what? Hell, I didn't even know you were seein' anyone!"

"Yeah I have been..." her face beaming with happiness the grin spreading across her face, joyful "Look, I don't know how to tell you this, so I'll just say it. It's Daniel. I've been seeing Daniel, CJ s brother" she looks at him hoping for approval but sadly it doesn't come.

"What?..." he frowns, shocked "What the hell? NO!... No, it can't be... Mandy this is a joke, right?"

"No.. no, it's not a joke. Jason, we've been seeing each other a while now. And I know it just moved more quickly than, I thougth it would but you know with what happened to…" she swallows hard, concerned about mentioning her name "to CJ, we thought why wait. So, when he asked, I said yes"

"Mandy, wait… you can't not with him"

"Jason, look I know you're hurting still but what I do, it really is none of your business. I understand its difficult, him being her brother but… I love him"

"No, Mandy it's not that it's…." he stops talking, choosing his words hesitating "You just can't, you can't trust him"

"Hmm….you know you piss-me- off Jason. He's not CJ! They're not both the same. Just because you didn't trust her… He tried to help her, and she wouldn't accept it. Now he doesn't have to keep paying for that!" she closes her eyes she doesn't want to get angry with him, but she can feel it bubbling inside her "Jason, I'm saying this as a friend. You have to get over this, you can't keep living in the past"

"But Mandy, I …"  
"No Jason! Just stop it! Me and you was never gonna work out and now well, I have a chance of something now something I haven't had before. With someone who wants me." She stares at him, his eyes drop, and she can see a hurt lost look in his face. She feels sorry for him "Jason, be happy for me …please?"

"I can't! I'm sorry but CJ she told me not trust him. He's no good for you. Please think about what you're doing."

"Okay, I'm not listening to this anymore. You really need to stop this!" she takes a deep breath and bites her lip "Jason you have to accept that CJ is dead! And you have to move on, just the same as I'm doing. Yeah sure, him being her brother, it's not ideal but it what it is and I'm not gonna let you ruin this for me. Do you understand" She frowns then takes a large sip from her drink, before picking up her jacket and putting it on. "You'll always be my friend, but I'm sorry, I need more in my life and he's offering it. You didn't."

"Mandy please don't do this!"

Sliding her arms in the jacket she puts it on "Jason I'll look into what you asked me, but we won't be discussing my relationship with Daniel again!" She finishes the last of her drink and kisses his cheek "Thanks for the drink. Let me know when you want some help with that file" She turns around and walks away.

"Shit!" Jason rubs his head and goes to the bar and orders another double whiskey.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

 **Two days later**

"Jason, it's Matt. I just landed. I can meet you at my hotel at say eleven. I'll just get unpacked and cleaned up."

"Yeah sure I'll be there. Text me the address"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason walks into the bar at the hotel. He sits, Matt already there waiting on a stool, the barman taking his order.

"Hey!"

"Hey, look thanks for coming. Should we sit, in private, at a table?"

Matt frowns but he picks up his drink and they move seating. "Jason, what's this all about? Why the urgency to see me?"

Jason lays the letter and key on the table in front of him. "I need to know what this fit. It's some kinda cash or security box. I think it might be still be in the house, her father's house or even her office"

"Jason.." Matt frowns " I told you when you called, she cleared the house out way back. It's been totally empty, for a long time"

"Maybe she left something. I need you to check for me. I need to find what this fit because she sent me something else." he looks at Matt as Matt stares at the key

"So, what else did she send you?"

Jason pause unsure if to tell him. He sighs, sipping from his glass " A file, a computer file. And I think that whatever this opens, it will help me open the computer file!"

Matt swallows hard "Jason are you sure about this? Would you be better off not knowing? Seriously there are things …. Lots of things… trust me, it's better not to know!"

"But I need to know. That's just it. Look she sent me this for a reason and I think it was to keep us safe. That's all she ever wanted to do was keep everyone, me, and Jaycee, safe. And now I need to do the same."

"Well why don't you just ask Daniel. I mean, he must know, right?"

"I can't …I can't ask him. Because in the letter she wrote me, she told me to trust you and not him!"

"What? I don't understand. She loved her brother. Sure, they fought. Lots. But she looked after him. She took care of trouble he got in. She never trusted me with anything. Never talked to me, told me secrets. She very rarely opened up so why would she tell you to trust me?"

"Well she obviously did, Look Matt, if she didn't trust you .. she wouldn't have said this. I know her too well!"

"But I don't understand why she would tell you not to trust her brother ? He knew all the things she was into, I didn't." Matt closes his eyes and drinks. He's lost deep in his thoughts "Look maybe .. ..I mean it's not like I know for sure but I did used to think she controlled him, Daniel that she kept him in check, held his reins but things switched, I noticed it there was a big change a while back and towards the end…. well, I think it was the other way around. He was controlling her. Just my professional opinion!" He shrugs "She became kinda reliant on him. There were things she dd that I didn't understand Not knowing how she used to be. But there was a lot of things, towards the end that just didn't make any sense, her behaviour. " He downs his drink and stands up to head to the bar and order another. "I do know he was I trouble. I mean I heard stuff they talked about"

"Trouble? "Jason frowns at him "What sort of trouble?"

"Rumours I overheard. he sighs "he owed money, _a_ _lot_ of money and to some nasty….well really bad people. People you don't wanna get mixed up with!" He looks up, frowning at Jason. "He um… he also had a gambling problem. Probably shouldn't be telling you this but he used to come to me for advice, off the book kind of. That's how he got me to look after Catherine when she first …" he closes his eyes thinking back about her "… when has he brought her back from the hospital? After I treated her in rehab. Jason, she wasn't in a good way then but…well I never knew about the baby she lost, Imean she never spoke about that, or even mentioned it. Not once It wasn't on her records ether o way I remembered"

"So why are you telling me this? What, does he still owe money?" Jason frowns

"I don't know, no for sure I just picked things up from conversations they had, I do know she stepped in a few times to help him. And I think she put herself on the line for him to protect him.. He isn't… _wasn't_ as strong as her!" he finishes the last of the takes another sip of drink as he looks up at Jason watching him " Jason, something definitely changed towards the end She just wasn't herself. It's just no one could get through to her". He lets out a long sigh

"So, will you look in the house for me?"

"Jason .. I…. "

"I'd go myself but with the kids . it's difficult."

"Okay! Yeah I suppose I could look. But like I said the last time we went there the place was empty"

"Yeah well just look for me, please. Matt also, it's probably best if we keep this between us, just for now!"

"Yeah sure ..."he apprehensively smiles " you want another drink?"


	65. Chapter 65

Chapter 65: You're going to tell me what I need to know

"Hey!"  
Daniel smiles as he puts his hands round her waist as she arrives back at the hotel room

"Hey!" she smiles insincerely "Daniel..don't" she removes his hands from her waist "I need a shower"

"what's wrong?" he frowns "Mandy? … where have you been?"

"It doesn't matter….. I just need a shower .. it's been a long day"

"Okay… but it's nothing I've done though, right?"

"No!...No, not you!" she smiles and kisses him

"Good…because if it was, you would tell me, wouldn't you?"

"Yeah!... Yeah, of course I would.. I just need a shower.. that's all!" she smiles to reassure him as she heads into the bathroom

He frowns wondering what's been going on

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"You wanna eat out or stay in?" he shouts as he hears her run the water in the shower  
She doesn't answer, and he frowns as he heads into the bathroom.

He stands watching her naked body through the shower door glass "Mandy, I said do you want to eat out or stay in tonight?"

"Oh!" she take a quick breath in as he makes her jump "... Daniel I was miles away…sorry.. can we stay in?... do you mind?"

He looks round the glass and smiles as her  
"I was hoping you'd say that … I'll ring down and order some food… you sure you're okay?" he watches her looking at him as the water runs over her

"Yeah I'm fine!…what?" she sees the way he's looking at her "No! really I am"

"Okay! as long as you are... I'll order the food then"

As he steps away from the glass door she calls him back

"Daniel!"

"Yeah?" he looks back round the screen

"Come here!"

she pulls at his bathrobe pulling him into the water

"Mandy! I… " but he soon stops talking as she puts her lips to his

"Shut up!" she smiles and slips the now wet bathrobe off him

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They lay on the bed after making love. He's gently running his hand down her side

"You're quiet. What's wrong?"

"Just thinking…"

"Just thinking about what?"

She sighs " Jason"

"Jason? . .. Oh!"

"NO!.. no not like that!... I went to see him.. .to errmm .. tell him about .."  
she holds her ring up to the light " about the engagement… I thought I owed him that. To hear it from me!"

"And…. I'm guessing from your reaction .. he wasn't' happy?"

She sighs  
"No!...No he wasn't .. I just thought he might get it.. that I was happy"

"And … why wasn't he?.. I mean happy for you"

"I guess because he's still hurting .. and this . ..with us .. you being CJ's brother…. We'll it's a lot of him to take on board and deal with"

Daniel frowns " Mandy who I was related to … has nothing to do with how I feel about you.. you know that.. if Jason can't be happy for his friend then…" he shrugs

"I know!... I know… I'm just trying to be understanding … I just wish.."

"Wish what?"

She sighs "that she could have just left him alone… let him move on! But even now she still has to mess with him!"

"Sorry I don't' understand " he frowns at her puzzled

"Oh, Nothing it doesn't matter!"

He turns her over to face him " .. well obviously it does matter .. to you ..Mandy what's going on?"

She sighs "look I'm probably wrong to say anything but… CJ wrote him some letter… and sent this stupid key. Probably some messed up game on her part if you ask me... now he's on some mission to track down what it all means.. he's seeing things that are not there .. not trusting anyone .. thinking everyone's the same as her"

"A letter?"

"Yeah! I don't know I guess it was like a heart to heart "she sighs

"And the key?...what was the key for?"

She shrugs  
" I have no idea… neither does he .. he thinks if finds what it fits… it'll… Oh it doesn't' know he's just worried about his kids .. he just wants to keep them safe" she bites her lip as she pauses as Daniel frowns at her  
"he's worried someone will come after whatever it was she was hiding ..oh who knows!"  
she sighs again "Why is everything all secrets and lies with her? … Has it always been? I guess it has .. He just won't see it" she sighs again "Daniel! .. I just wanted him to be happy for me … I wanted him to .. I don't … give his blessing say it…. was okay"

"Hey…" he brushes her hair back "we don't need his blessing … Catherine isn't here anymore... she has no control over things now! .. he needs to realise that!"  
he kisses her " I love you! .. I want to marry you! .. nothing Catherine writes in a letter will stop that…" he kisses her again and again till she smiles

" Look there are things.. things about Catherine .. that even he doesn't know .. the trouble she was in... " He closes his eyes " Do you know she owed money?... to a lot of bad people .." he nods as Mandy frowns at him  
"gambling debts with the wrong people .. father bailed her out several times .. but she .. well like everything .. she didn't stop"

He pauses letting out a long deep sigh  
". .she couldn't stop just like with the drinking .. .. look no one knows this ..but when she got took hostage… it was because of the gambling debts she owed favors and she didn't pay up " he rubs his hands through his hair  
"Oh god Mandy it's been a mess over the years… I did what I could .. but you saw what she was like.. she was... oh... she took tablets … and in the end I had to supervise her with them.. she wouldn't listen" he closes his eyes and lets out a huge deep sigh and a tear trickles down his cheek "this whole mess is my fault .. I should have seen it sooner… done something sooner … I just didn't' wanna push her to the edge again" he starts to cry

"Hey…." She puts her hand to his face "Daniel come on .." she smiles sympathetically " I'm sure you did everything you could .. it can't have been easy? I mean I know what she was like with Jason.. and even Clay .. …so I'm sure you did you everything you could" she frowns " and I know you're right…" she kisses him back "Jason needs to get over it.. he needs to stop chasing the past! I'm gonna suggest he see a therapist… even just short term.. I know he won't accept it but then I've done my part as his friend" she shrugs "what else can I do?"

He nods "if that's what you think?" he kisses her again "you know I'm here for you whatever?" he smiles

" so did he say what this letter said?"

"No…. just….. oh nothing.. it doesn't matter" she sighs "He just doesn't trust anyone now .. she made him like that!... but he can't see it. He wants to blame everyone else"

She kisses him and turns over pushing him back on the bed as she gives him a big and sexy smile "anyway…. Let's forget all that .. how long do we have before dinner?"

"Mmmm! ..a while...because you know what?...I forgot to order" he laughs

"Well that's good then it gives us more time!" She smiles back as she leans in and kisses him.

He grabs her head rolling her over on her back  
"Mmmm.. and to think soon you'll be Mrs Mandy Lewis .. and all mine!"

She laughs "Soon?" she frowns

"What?" he rubs her frown lines "You don't wanna wait too long do you? I love you Mandy Ellis I want you to be my wife as soon as possible"

"Well I wasn't really thinking about soon but.. I guess there's no reason to wait too long"

"Yeah! Well think about a date!"  
he pushes firmly but gently inside of her as she lays back on the bed, it makes her catch her breath for a moment  
" _Ohhhh! Mmmm!... Daniel!"_ her words are breathless as he continues to make love to her "I love you too!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Mandy wakes to find Daniel dressing

" Are you going somewhere?" she frowns as she pulls the sheet over her nakedness

He leans over and kisses her "yeah!... I'm sorry I have to go back to Washington for a few days … work. You know Work?!"

She smiles "Okay.. but so soon?.. you didn't say anything last night?"

"Yeah well .. things got in the way.. if you remember?" he smiles

"Yeah! I guess they did!" she smiles back and leans up to kiss him "so how long before I see you again?"

"Oh, not too long .. I ll try and come back by the end of the week . .or you could come see me?"

"Maybe… I'll see what I've got on"

she pulls him down by his tie till his lips meet hers and looks him in the eyes "Mmmm … you really can't be tempted to stay?"

He smiles as he brushes her hair off her face "I could … but errrm… sorry I have to catch my flight"

"Okay … I'll let you go this time" she looks at her ring again "I'll just stay here and admire the view"

"You do that … I've taken the liberty of ordering you some breakfast .. enjoy!"

He kisses her one more time and takes her hand to look at the ring on her finger "I'll call you later" then he picks his briefcase up and leaves

o-o-o-o-o-o-

Matt's searched all over CJ's old office.  
He can't find anything that looks like it has a key.

Most of the files and correspondence have gone except for a file that contains pictures of Jaycee and Jason. He picks it up and browses through the photos as he sighs and shakes his head before he lays it back down on the desk.  
He's also been looking for and can't find the house keys that he know used to be in the top drawer of her desk.

What he does find in the drawers is several empty orange plastic prescription containers. He takes one out and holds up.  
"What the hell?" he frowns  
There are some that still contain tablets and he takes then out and looks at them in the light. "What the hell were you taking these for?" he frowns and looks at the label.

He even googles the medication to confirm his initial thoughts  
"Oh my god!... seriously?" his frown deepens "this shouldn't have been happening!" he sighs "no wonder you were getting so paranoid about things if you were on these"

he puts a few of the bottles in his pocket as he continues to look for the house keys, still with no luck.

 _"hmmmm!_ Where else would they be?" He sighs again as he closes the office door, and heads down the corridor

"Hi Donna!" Matt smiles at Daniel's secretary

she smiles "Hi Matt what can I do for you? You know Daniels away for a few days"

"Errmmm…yeah I know that but .. errm I have to ….errm … clear something out of .." he coughs to cover his awkwardness at lying "Catherine's house. I wondered if maybe you have the keys? maybe in his desk … I tried where they used to be in hers but since her office is empty they're not there!"

she sighs and drops her smiles to look sympathetic  
"Yeah!..Yeah they cleared most of her office out now ..look Matt I'm sorry for your loss .. just because Catherine and I didn't really get along very well doesn't mean I'm not sorry .. its been tough on everyone especially Daniel ...and I guess you."  
She laughs under her breath " It's also been chaos! Daniel's so disorganized … I didn't realize how much control she had over everything. I know he's my boss" she coughs "but he's not as organised as she was!" she laughs

"Yeah I know!" Matt laughs "that's why I think he forgot to leave the keys with me before he went"

"I'll get them for you … I think they were on the desk.. I'm sure I saw them."

"Oh, I could go…." he closes his eyes as she gets up and heads to the office door just as she does a courier and a secretary from the other office come into the office  
" Oh, errmmm sorry Matt.. I better just sort these!"

"I can get them myself .. you sort that out its more important!" he smiles "I'll only need 2 minutes"

"Oh!... If you're sure? .. they're probably in the top drawer or on top of the desk"  
she signs the courier's clipboard while talking " you might have to rummage he's not very tidy" she laughs

"Donna I need some signatures" the other secretary smiles and Donna takes her attention off Matt who heads into the office

"I'll leave you to it!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Matt enters the office

It's very much like Catherine's, but much smaller. Donna was right he's a lot more disorganized and even has clothes laid on the couch which looks like he's slept there. 

Matt opens the top drawer … and searches but finds nothing that looks like keys.

He then opens the second one down and the one the other side when he sees what look like the keys under the computer monitor

 _"Hmmm!"_  
He snatches them up in his hand but as he goes to close the drawer he notices a couple of full orange prescription bottles the same as the ones in Catherine's drawer.  
He frowns as he takes them out and laid underneath them are some printed what looks like prescription labels "These are in Catherine's name!" he frowns "What the hell?"

He frowns even more as he looks at the prescription on the bottle he took from the drawer  
"D .M Lewis"  
He take the ones out of his pocket from the drawer of Catherine's desk  
"Catherine J Lewis"

now he takes the printed labels out "Catherine J Lewis. … What … the .. hell? What the fuck is going on here?"

he continues to frown as he compares the containers side by side  
"what the hell is this about .. there is no way she should be taking these …..not with the drinking problems she had!" he looks at the Doctors name on the bottles "this doesn't make sense!"

he turns and looks up as he's taken by surprise as Donna comes to the door. He hides the bottles back in his pocket.

"Did you find the keys?"

"Ermmm ….yes I've got them!" he smiles "thanks"

"What did you say you needed to get?" she frowns "I thought Daniel said he cleared the house out?"

"Oh errmmm… yeah I think there was something left that she wanted her son to have… I said I'd get it and send it on"

he smiles as he notices Donna wearing a pink scarf a very similar one in a different color he notices among the clothes of Daniels on the couch.

Matt smiles to himself _"I'll guess what Catherine told me about Daniel and his secretaries was true then"_  
"Okay I better get off !"  
he heads to the door "when did Daniel say he'll be back ?"

"Oh errmm…. his flights due in tomorrow" she smiles as she also spots her scarf among the clothes and picks it up.

"oh, that's good I'll speak to him then"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

"Hi errmmm... this is Dr Matt Fisher.. I don't know if you can help me I wanted to speak to Dr Zuckerman about … errmmm…. a mutual patient!"

"He's just finished with a patient I'll put you through Dr Fisher"

"Dr Zuckerman?

"yes"

"My name is Doctor Fisher .. sorry to disturb you but I was just clearing some old notes that need to be signed off on one of my deceased patients and I just wanted to check something with you as your name was on a prescription of hers"

"Okay sure if I can help what's the patients name"

"Oh.. errmm Catherine Lewis.. Catherine Jane Lewis"

"Just a moment I'll check my notes.. can I ask what's the problem?" 

."Well I'm guessing you were aware she had a drink problem… which is what I was helping her with.. and therefore, I wanted to find out why you prescribed the medication you did, as in my opinion it would have contributed to her increase paranoia and possible leading to a psychosis… If I had been aware of this medication I may have prescribed a different course of action"

"well that does sound strange if she was dealing with alcohol addiction, but I would need more details to fully explain any reason for prescribing "

"Yes, I appreciate that, and I'll email you the details .. I'll do that now but that would be most helpful in tying up my notes if I could just find out why she had them?" 

"can I ask who the patient is again? As I'm not locating any notes under that name on my system .. can I check the spelling? "

"Yes …yes sorry the patient is a Catherine Jane Lewis."

"can you hold a moment? I'll check with my assistant"

Yes, I'll hold"

he waits for the Doctor to come back

"I'm' sorry neither myself nor my assistant can find any records for that patient. Are you sure she was a patient of mine"

"Sorry? What You don't have a patient by that .. would you have a deceased patient file as she died a few weeks ago"

"No as I explained there is nothing coming up .. where did you get my name in relation to this?"

"You were on the prescription! Dr Zuckerman …were you treating another patient of mine ..maybe? Her brother…. Daniel Mark Lewis? would he have come to see you?"

"Is he also a patient of yours otherwise you know I can't divulge any medical information"

"Yes" he gulps " he was a patient of mine as well .. I'm just curious as I've found the medication and as I said I just need to get my patient files up to date"

"Yes, I have Mr Lewis on my system .. oh yes I can see from my notes he was being treated by you for gambling addiction and I prescribed for his insomnia and constant anxiety but I'm not sure why he came to me and didn't get you to prescribe directly? …actually I see now he hasn't attended here for some time!"

"Okay that's great don't worry I have all the information I need right now .. thank you for your time"

He puts the phone down "SHIT!"

He bites his lip. Taking a photo of the medication he drafts a text to Jason

o-o-o-o-o-o

Matt's been at the house for over an hour now and checked everywhere. He's been all over and found nothing. Not a box, a safe, not one thing has been left anywhere that he can see would take a key

"shit .. hmmm!" he sighs as he sits on the arm of only thing left in the building, a large brown leather couch while he thinks

He stops and frowns as his attention is diverted to what sounds like the front door click shut

"Hello?" He listens but hears nothing "Hello… …is there someone there?" He shakes his head _"must be hearing things"_

He picks up his phone

"Jason… it's Matt" the phone has gone to voicemail

"I'm at the house. There's nothing here… I can't find anything … you're right though something's not right. I'm sending you a text regarding something I found and I'm errmm…. gonna do something I wouldn't normally do .. I'm sending you a log in for her medical records if you can give them to your medic, we still need to observe patient confidentiality even though she's …well you know... . Just get him to look it over. Somethings not right but errrmm.. if he takes a look…"

he frowns again a what he thinks is another noise. He listens again then when he hears nothing he continues his message  
" I know she trusted him, and she told me he took care of her ….he might notice something I don't! Jason we need to talk ..but errm… I think we should do it in person…. I'll come…. "

he stops speaking as he hears another noise for sure this time  
"I've got to go" he frowns "…. I'll call you back!"

he goes back to his text box and sends the text he drafted earlier to Jason

"Hello…." He gets up and cautiously walks to the door "who's there?...Oh!... Daniel! Oh my god!" he sighs _"Phewwww!_ You made me jump I wasn't expecting anyone" he smiles anxiously  
"what the hell are you doing here?... I thought you weren't back till tomorrow"

Daniels smiles " No I had to come back.. I had something to take care of… so?" he looks round the room "what are _you_ doing here?"

"oh err mm.. I just … wanted five minutes in the house… you know I was thinking about Catherine today .. and she loved this place and err mm… you know I always wanted her to live here. I just wanted to see it one last time.. I guess you're gonna to sell it now?"

Daniel smiles "I guess perhaps!...so…. did you find it?"

"Sorry what?" Matt starts to breath harder at Daniels question

"What you were looking for…. Did you find it?"

"Errmm I don't understand ...I wasn't looking for anything I told you"  
he smiles but he starts to feel nervous now at Daniels tone "Look I should errm ….get going .. things to do"

"No!... I don't think so…" Daniel smiles "I need to know what you were looking for"

"I told you .. nothing. I really just wanted to feel close to her here…. that's all.. that's the truth"

"I see .." he sighs "but No! no… I don't think that's the truth…" he sniffs "sit-down Matt"

"Daniel I need to go.." he pushes past to get out the door "I'll speak to you at the office later"

Matt puts his hand on the door handle and starts to turn it, then Daniel calls him back

"Matt….sit down!"

Matt frowns as he takes a breath and turns back to face Daniel

"I don't think you're going anywhere, why don't you take a seat!"

Matt takes a sharp intake of breath as he faces Daniel who's now standing there with a gun pointing at him  
"Now…. as I said…we're going to _talk_ about what you were looking for!"

Two large guys also enter the room now "…and I think you're _going_ to tell me what I need to know! Aren't you? "

o-o-o—o-o-o-o-o-


	66. Chapter 66

**Chapter 66: this little sucker should get through anything**

Matt closes the door to his office and leans his head back. Taking a deep breath and lets it out slowly as he takes his jacket off and hangs it on the back of the chair. Then he pours himself a very large whiskey from the tray on the side table and takes a large gulp as he finds a contact number on his phone

"Yeah…errrmmmmm…. I need a disposal and clean-up" he sniffs and takes another drink "Can you get it done?"  
he wipes the sweat off his brown and loosens his tie "I'll text you the address" he hangs up and chucks his phone down on the desk  
" _Phewwww!"_ he lets out a long sigh as he knocks the rest of the drink back and then pours another  
"Shit!"

He bites his lip looking at the photo on the table of him, Catherine and their father.  
"You stupid bitch!" he swipes the frame off the side and drinks the rest of his drink .

Putting his hand to the inside pocket of his jacket, he takes out a small bag of white powder which he then sprinkles on the glass top of the side table next to the whiskey decanter.  
Making a line with the silver card laid at the side of the drinks tray, he quickly snorts it back rubbing his nose as it fizzes inside.  
He stands back closing his eyes waiting for the momentary rush as he takes a deep breath. Relaxing and he smiles and calls out  
"DONNA! Can you come in here"?

She comes to the doorway "you okay?" she frowns watching him wondering what's going on

He thinks for a moment before answering "Yeah!" he sniffs "I need you to book me a flight .." he wipes under his nose "back to Virginia Beach"

She frowns "you're going back again?" she watches him but decides not to question it further "Alright I'll do it now. When for? And how long?"

he looks at her and takes another mouthful of drink "You know what forget it for now…tomorrow will do!...Come here!" he beckons her towards him

"Daniel, are you okay?"

"Yeah!" He sniffs again as he brushes her hair back off her shoulder and kisses her neck

"Daniel" she tips her head to the side, she feels slightly awkward at this sudden attention "I need to get back to work" she smiles

"you are, working … now lock the door there's something I need you to do for me" he smiles as he pushes her back against the closed door and slides her skirt up to her waist

"Daniel ..it's been a while…I thought you said we couldn't do this anymore? "

"Yeah well now I've changed my mind" he smiles at her

"not that I'm complaining but what's brought this on?"

"Do you wanna fuck or not?"

She gulps as much as she want's him she hates when he talks to her like this, but she knows it's the coke that makes him this way  
She's uncomfortable as he unbuttons her shirt but after he kisses her a few times she starts to get tingle of excitement and smiles putting her hand round the back of his head for a longer harder kiss from him. Now she feels like he wants her and that tingle turns to all out excitement "mmmm!...you've been drinking?"

"Does it matter?"

"No!... I like it" she smiles she takes the glass from his hand and flirting with him she drinks some

He smiles at her as he slides her panties down and unbuttons his pants then he aggressively takes her there at door  
" _Oh god!_ …Daniel ….slow down … not so … _aahhhhh!… ohhh god!"_

He pins her to the door hands either side of her head "Really?" he leans back and looks her in the eyes "you want me to slow down "

She watches him seeing his eyes glazed from the drink and drugs and shakes her head  
"No! … No, I want you .. you know that " she kisses him hard putting her leg up to his waist and closes her eyes steadying herself to the force of his moves

They're laid on the couch in the office both naked and she tries to find her shirt to cover herself as he hands her another drink and wipes the powder from under her nose. She smiles

"I thought this was over?" she looks at him seductively over the rim of her glass as she leans back on the couch

" Yeah well… maybe not. Not now Catherines not sticking her nose in" he pulls her hair back behind her head and leans in again to kiss her

She smiles an apprehensive smile. The coke she took earlier is wearing off and shes now wondering about his tone

"Daniel are you alright?" She frowns "you're hitting it pretty hard!"

"Don't worry about me… I'm fine" he drinks from his drink running his hand down the inside of her thigh

"I just think you need to slow down!"

"you telling me what to do now?" he pulls her hair back harder "you're not my sister" he looks her in the eyes seeing that sudden fear he's invoked in her.

"I didn't mean anything by it … I'm just worried about you… that's all"  
she doesn't like when he gets aggressive like this and she hasn't seen it for a while. It used to happen more when they made love after he'd clashed with Catherine.

She tries to change the subject "Did Matt tell you he needed to get in the house?"

he swings round and looks at her again "Matt?.. what about Matt?"

"He came for the keys…..the keys to Catherine's house? He said he'd spoken to you? I let him take them" she frowns "was I not supposed to?"

He snaps back "It's _NOT_ Catherine's _HOUSE!"_ .. he grinds his teeth and lets out a long annoyed breath "It should have been my house…. I deserved that .. I needed it!.. instead she leaves it to that brat of Hayes" he sniffs again and gets up and paces the room " _phewwww!"_

Donna frowns and gets up. She rubs his shoulders trying to calm him " Daniel what's the matter?"

"She's still fucking me over!… that's what's the matter… even though she's dead!"

Donna frowns "What happened?"

He turns on her grabbing her hair and pushing her back against the wall  
"you know you ask too many questions" he looks her in the face staring deep into her eyes it scares her  
"Daniel don't!" she puts her hand on his where he has hold of her hair behind her head getting him to let go  
"Please Daniel ..you're hurting me!" she smiles putting her hand to his cheek now trying to calm him again "you know you can tell me … you can tell me anything …what is it?"

He smiles as he stands his glass down  
"Nothing!...Sorry!" he bites his lip looking at her. He senses her apprehensive her almost fear of him as flicks her shirt open and puts his hand on her breast and feels her.  
" _Hmmmmm!"_ he smiles before he kisses her his tongue on hers

Then he stands back with his hand inside her shirt. He sighs as he watches her, as she's watching him while he touches her but to her it's like he's somewhere else… with.. someone else.

Donna closes her eyes to his touch its not something she's enjoying anymore "You know I should go book that flight for you" she bites her lip

"errmm… you should …but it can wait .. I'm not finished with you yet!" he smiles and pushes her back to the couch

"Daniel .. I think you've had enough to drink now.. perhaps its best if I just get dressed?"

He sniffs and kisses into her neck ignoring everything she's saying as he forces himself inside her again.  
She closes her eyes thinking about why she lets him behave like this? Why she wants him so much even when he treats her like she's nothing, and why she would do anything for him.

Why does she think she loves him when she has to admit to herself that he scares her a times, especially at times like now when she can't control what he does.  
She leans her head back and tries to forget where she is and what he's doing.

It's getting late and eventually he passes out from the drink and coke he's taken

Donna runs her hands through her hair as she picks her clothes up and starts to get dressed.  
"Shit!" she closes her eyes and rubs her now aching head. She looks at him passed out on the couch and kisses his cheek.

She picks up the glass of whisky from the floor beside him and puts it on the tray on the side table and taking the throw from the large leather chair she covers him over and picks his clothes up.

She folds them into a much neater pile on the chair and as she does some keys fall out of the pants pockets to the floor and she picks up them up.  
She frowns as she recognises them as the keys Matt borrowed to the house. "what the hell?"  
she lays them on the side table with his phone and then closes the office door behind her.

Back in her office she goes to her desk and taps on the computer to book the flight to Virginia Beach then when it's done, she turns out the desk light and heads home.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sonny's setting the drill up

"Will this work?" Clay frowns at him "Hey Jaycee don't touch ..look Daddy will be here soon to pick you up… we get you another drink"  
Jaycee shakes his head ignoring Clay

Clay frowns at him then looks at the stuff on the table "Sonny, Jason will be here soon… we need to put this away for now.. we can do it when he's gone!"

"Yeah sure thing .. but this little sucker should get through anything so should easily get that lock open!"

There's a loud purposeful knock on the apartment door

"Sonny that'll be Jason" Clay frowns at Sonny before he answers the door they gather everything up

"Just a minute .. I'm coming!... stick it behind the couch in that bag …. Hey, Jaycee Daddy's, here" he smiles at the little boy playing with his blocks at table

Sonny gathers the drill and shoves it in the bag with the security box putting the whole lot back behind the couch, as Clay opens the door

"Hey!" Jason walks in he smiles at Jaycee who for a moment turns to look at him although he makes no attempt to move but instead carries on with his toys

"How's he been?"

Sonny looks up "yeah well … I told ya .. you know where he gets it from!" he raises his eyes

Clay frowns trying to ignore the comment "he's been fine .. ..he's just at that age nothing to do with anything else" he shakes his head at Sonny  
"We didn't give him anything to eat yet .. I didn't know if you'd got stuff planned?" he takes Jaycee's juice cup to the kitchen "you wanna beer before you go?"

"Yeah sure why not.. he looks happy enough!"

"You alright?" Sonny frowns at him "you look like you got stuff on your mind? Wanna lighten the load?"

"Nah .. I'm fine!... it's nothing!"

Sonny sits up "Jace … you don't look fine … maybe we can help?"

" it's nothing really ..oh ermm Just…. I spoke to Mandy.. we had _words_ yesterday … did you know she's gotten engaged" he frowns

"Engaged?" Clay hands him the beer "to who? I mean I didn't know she was serious about anyone!"

Jason sips his beer "Yeah… me neither!"

"So, who is he?" Sonny leans forward sipping his beer

Jason coughs before speaking, it's not really something he wants to say "Daniel!" he shakes his head "CJs brother!"

"What the hell?" Sonny frowns "CJ's brother and Mandy?.. how the hell did that happen?"

"I don't know!" Jason shrugs

Clay now frowns at Sonny then back at Jason "so what's the problem? I mean as long as shes happy?..Right?"

Jason looks at his beer thinking "I don't know really.. it's nothing to do with me but I suppose .. cos he's CJ' brother… it just feels weird" he shrugs

"Or cos you think _you_ should have taken it further .. with Miss Mandy?"

Jason glares at Sonny and frowns "No!... No, not at all….Mandy and me … it would never have worked out! We're just friends… what?" he frowns at the look on Sonny's face and laughs "we are!"

"Sure, if you say so ….. you tell yourself that and why wouldn't you work out? … oh …I forgot… cos you're still hooked up to the past"  
Sonny has another swig of beer and sighs "Jace man…you _have_ to let it go…. CJs not coming back.. you can't put your life on hold forever….Man if you like Mandy you need to tell her, before it's too late and she marries that douch bag!"

Jason smiles awkwardly and sips his beer he looks straight ahead watching Jaycee at the table  
" hey you… what're you doing?" he touches JC who's knocking his bricks over "Come here!"

Jaycee turns around and comes to his dad. That's when Jason sees him fiddling with something metal  
"Hey what you got there?" he frowns "Jaycee give me that .. what is it?" worried he might hurt himself he snatches the metal object the little boy's holding out and examines it.  
"it's a key?" he frowns

"Oh, hey Jaycee!... give me that!" Clay makes a grab for they key as he looks at Sonny in a panic "that's just something of mine"

Jason holds it in his hand "Where you get this?"

"Oh its…. an old thing .. I was just clearing some stuff out and trying to remember what it was for. It's nothing. Give it to me I'll put it away!" he puts his hand out to take it, but Jason keeps it in his grasp

"I asked you where you go it?"

Clay gulps "I told ya…clearing out!"

"Yeah but see I don't buy that!"

Sonny leans forward frowning "Jace man Clay told ya..he's just clearing some stuff" Sonny looks awkwardly at Clay and takes a sip of his beer

"I'm gonna ask one more time Clay… _where_ did you get this?"

Clay stands silent, he's really not sure what to answer. He can't believe he stupidly left the key on the table

"Someone sent it to him" Sonny shakes his head. He also can't believe this has to come out now "He doesn't know who . .it just arrived in the mail.. Jace, that's the truth man!"

"What else did you get with it?"

Clay frowns and shakes his head "Nothing!... just that in an envelope"

Sonny sighs and looks at Clay "oh hell!...the truth gonna come out now anyway .. he got another key ..Clay show him" Clay frowns "Just show him man… you might as well tell him the truth!"

Clay sighs and takes the Motel key off the side table "it came with this?" he hands it to Jason

Jason looks at it in his hand "and that's it? That's all that came? No explanation?"

Clays about to speak when Sonny steps in "yeah that was it!" he nods as he swigs his beer and points "just those two keys in an envelope " Sonny darts a glance a Clay

Clay looks down he was all out for telling Jason the whole truth about the scan picture and everything, but he thinks better of it. The same as he guesses Sonny did as he kept that part quiet

"So, what's this key" he frowns as he kind of recognises the tag.. "wait this that motel.. where we found her?" he looks up at Sonny "Where she was staying"

Clay nods "Yeah!.. we stayed there together sometimes" he fidgets awkwardly it feels kind of embarrassing explaining this to Jason even now after all this time  
"when we first got together that's where she was staying then … we use to go there ..it was kind of a joke between us in the end!... I'm sorry man" he sighs

"And you didn't think to tell me?...that she sent you this key"

"I don't know who sent it.."he frowns again " I mean… I don't know .. why it's come now"

"Yeah you do! You know she had it sent!…..And there was nothing else ? no letter?...no explanation with it?"  
Clay looks at Sonny again and gulps "No nothing … just that"

Sonny reaches behind the couch and takes the bag with the security box in it and dumps it on the table

"What's that?"

Clay gulps "A security box from that motel!" he unwraps the bag

Jason takes a breath in as he sees the number on the front "and neither of you thought to tell me about this? ….Geez!" he rolls his eyes

"Jace… I have no idea what it was … and no reason to tell you I have no idea what's in it … I mean I can't get in it .. that's what we were trying to do" he looks at the drill " .. the one key .. it's not enough .. it needed two keys. I didn't have the other key… so I have no idea what it means it was just a lucky guess on my part … that I knew where to look"

Jason gets up drinking his beer "Shit!" he laughs to himself that it's just a random act by Jaycee that's let him know about the box. He gets his truck keys out of his pocket

Clay and Sonny frown "Jace you okay?"

"Yeah I'm fine!" he takes the key he has off the key ring and puts it in the slot on the box and walks away to the kitchen, dumping his empty beer bottle in the trash before taking another out of the fridge

Clay looks at Sonny and they both frown "I don't understand … you have a key to this too?"

Jason rubs his face " Yeah! Seems like it… you weren't the only one received something in the mail!" he sighs "Jesus Christ.. What the hell were you playing at CJ?" he sighs again "all this trouble to hide something!"

"Well whatever the hell it is we're about to find out!" Sonny looks at them both

They take a moment all looking at each other as Clay puts his key in the other lock and turns both the keys together. The door now unlocks.  
Clay slowly pulls the door open, taking a deep breath, worried about what might be contained in the box. He looks up as he takes the envelope and another flash drive out and hands them across to Jason

Jason sits down with his head in his hands "shit! What the hell is this about!"


	67. Chapter 67

Chapter 67: Now go play!

Chapter Text

"So, what is it?" Jason turns holding his beer, to face Clay

"It looks like some codes .. and …passwords?" he frowns. He shows Jason the pieces of paper hoping he can make sense of it all " You think it's for this?" he holds up the flash drive he also took out of the box

Jason sighs "Only one way to find out, I guess!"

"you want me to plug it in? I'll get the laptop"

"Hey!... hold up… look…. do we really wanna be opening that up?... I mean … she went to all this trouble to hide it and … I don't know …but Geez anything to do with her just gives me bad ju ju .. maybe we should just leave it alone now?"

"Sonny, she left it for us to find … I think she wanted us to have it.. she wanted us to look for it .. that's what the phot..." he stops.  
He was gonna say that was what the scan photo was for, to make him look for something, but he looks as Jason and decides to keep quiet

"It's up to you Jason…. what you wanna do?"

Jason bites his lip and thinks for a moment "Open it up!"

"Geez! ..alright don't say I didn't warn ya!" Sonny shakes his head and drinks some more beer

Clay gets his laptop from his room and they plug in the flash drive. It starts to run a download

"What the hell's it doing?" he frowns "looks like it's downloading a programme on to the laptop!"  
Clay frowns as he hits random buttons, "it won't stop It's not a file.. it's just a programme…What the hell?" Clay looks confused

Jason nods and sighs "Yeah!...yeah... I remember now her saying something about it needed a programme to open it"

"Open what?... there's nothing else on here!"

Jason thinks for a moment and pulls his keys back out of his pocket, he looks at them and un-clips the small black plastic flash drive he attached for safe keeping. He holds it in his hand turning it over then he gives it to Clay

"What's this?" Clay looks at it then back at Jason "where'd this come from?"

"It's what else I received in the mail.. If I'm right and this is what I think it is then that's what opens it!"

"Okay! would make sense… so you still want me to..?"

Jason sighs again "May as well… we've come this far now!"

They all sigh. Sonny still feels uncomfortable as they wait of the programme to completely download then Clay swaps the flash drives over.  
Now the password boxes come up and he looks at Jason .. then he looks at the pieces of paper from the envelope, then back at Jason again. He has to admit he's as apprehensive as Sonny

"Clay just do it!"

Jason sighs and walks away to the kitchen. His head swirls with emotions he's thinking about her, about this file, about what might be on there. He puts his head in his hands  
 _"I have to get a grip here"_

Clay looks up at Sonny and sighs "we're in!"

Sonny sits forward on his chair his beer still in his hand as Jason sits on the couch opposite Clay at the table

"Shit!" Clay stares hard at the laptop screen  
Jason looks up at Clay from where he's sitting he sees the expression on his face "What?.. what is it?"

File after file come up a in a list of documents

Clay looks confused "Shit what the hell is this? there's hundreds of files" he frowns "it looks like code names?"

Jason nods thinking "search for the Hercules"

"What?" Clay questions and Sonny looks at them both

"just do it!"

Clay types "why the Hercules? What's that mean?"

"hang on something about that name... I remember weren't that a submarine?" Sonny frowns .. "Jason?"

"Just see if it's on there!"

"Yep.. what the hell….there it is!"

"open it!"

Clay double clicks "Jason what the hell is this?"

Jason quickly scan reads it  
"Open another one!"

"What anything?"

"Anything"

Clay clicks and scrolls and randomly opens a file ' Brown Mexico' -"Drugs shipment arrives.. cartel. Deaths .. Senator Brown signs off.. arrival .. shipment payment .. dead" the words all scroll past in a blur as Jason and Clay scan the text

"Who signed that?" Jason frowns

" errrmm... J Rivers…. Hang on I saw his name back up here, earlier in the document .. bribe. Transfer sent $$$$ What the hell?" Clay frowns "is this a cover up?... or what is it?"

Jason looks at Clay "J rivers?"

Clay shrugs. Sonny holds his phone up from his own internet search  
"Head of FBI Mexico task force …so what the hell?.. isn't he's supposed to be countering this stuff? Is he on the take?" Sonny frowns at them both

"What the hell?" Clay scrolls more files "there's literally hundreds of files on here .. are they all the same?.. lists of people and deals, drugs, gun, wait missiles?…..what the fuck is this?"

"Open some more!"

"SHIT! Oh my god!"

they read the more names they read the more payments. The more they read the worse it gets

"Jason.. this .. is …Shit! man!...the stuff on here is ...geez!" Clay's face drops as he looks at Sonny who's sitting in front of them drinking his beer

"Yeah.. yeah!...she said it was.. serious stuff… I just didn't take on board how much and who!... No wonder she tried to keep it protected. and no wonder they went to the lengths they did to get it back"

"Jason there's senators.. FBI agents… all kinds of people on here… if .. oh my god who the hell put this together? ...Is this what CJ did .. collected this information?"

"her and her father did yeah! .. or so she told me"

"you know I've seen his name on here!"

"Yeah!" Jason takes a deep long sigh "I think you'll find CJs is on there as well!"

"What?" Sonny looks at him "she was on the take?"

"No .. well not at the start...I don't know... that Reuben got her involved.. that's when this all started" he rubs his head

" no wonder people don't want this getting out...Jesus Christ!"

"or..." Sonny takes a swig of his beer "they wanna get hold of it.. imagine if you knew all those names… who you could blackmail, Right?"

Yeah! .. yeah … SHIT! .." Jason gulps "Alright shut it down!"

"Jason .. what the hell you gonna do with this?"

"I don't know yet!" he looks at Clay and shakes his head "I really don't know!"

"You could give it to Mandy?" Sonny looks at them and shrugs "surely she'd know what to do with it, Right?"

"Yeah .. maybe!... I need to think about this!...Just shut it down!" he bites his lip ".. put it back in there and keep it here and _NOT_ a word.. to anyone do you understand me.. no one! CJ was right… she said she didn't know how far it went.. and neither do we" they both nod as Clay locks it back up

"You keep one I keep the other" as he hands one of the keys to Clay "for now!"

"Phewwww! I need a drink!" Jason feels dazed his head trying to make sense of what he's seen and read "come on you " Jaycee's laying on his lap half asleep lets get you home to Grandma and she can put you to bed!"

"Hey Jace.. we'll see you at the bar later, Yeah?... Jason. ... It'll be alright you know!"

"Yeah!.. look I'll get him back then I'll errmm… catch up with ya in bit!"

"Sure…. Jace.. you okay?"

"Yeah .. just… hit a few raw nerves... I'll be fine"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Daniel wakes up and rubs his face. "Oh god!" He sighs as he sits round on the couch "fuck!" he rubs his aching head with both hands. He takes a long deep breath trying to bring himself round.

Getting up he goes to the tray and drinks down the last of the drink in the glass left from the night before. He rubs the stubble on his chin and brushes his hair over.

His phone buzzes with a call and he picks it up from beside the glass where it lays with the house keys

He rubs his eyes and hits answer

"Yeah!"

"Ahhh!... Mr Lewis … finally.. I take it you have what I want now?"

He sniffs "Not yet .. I'm still working on it!"

"Not good enough .. I'm out of time… so that means you're out of time now!"

"but I need more...time.. to get it!"

"No! I need to know something that's on that list and I need to know it now... so there is No ..more time... for either of us! Comprende?"

Daniel gulps "I'm just about there I can get it... I know where it is .. I just need 48hrs!"

"Mr Lewis... Daniel." There's a long laugh on the end of the phone "you couldn't get me my money and now it looks like you still can't get me this either so what am I going to do about that? ...hmmm! .. tell me?"

"Look yeah.. I get it, but… I just need 48hours.. it's not here .. I have to go to get it ...that will take time"

There's a long pause of silence then a big sigh  
"Please understand me ..I'm looking at a long spell in a place I don't want to be… now to avoid that I need that list... you know I could have you killed already.. but errrm.. well I think you joining me first... you know so I can discuss this with you face to face and errmmm.. also to watch you wonder.. each day if that day will be your last .. that constant worry of when and how is death coming …" there's a laugh again and Daniel swallows hard

" I promise 48hours .. and I'll have it for you..I know what I need to do now.. that's all I'm asking!"

Daniel holds while there is a long painful silence "Hmmm! .. very well .. I'll give you 48hours.. but no more I want that list!... Tick Tock Daniel there's no more chances!"

"I understand!" the phone goes dead  
"SHIT!...fuck! _phewwww!"_ he lets out a long deep desperate sigh _"_ Shit!" he runs his hands through his hair and pours another large glass of Whiskey and glugs it back while rubbing his face _"Phewwwwwwwww!"_ he's trying desperately to think what to do first

He looks at his clothes folded on the chair then he looks back at the couch the memories of the night before are now coming back to him. He smiles. "Fuck! … Alright!..Okay!"

He gets dressed then standing looking in the large mirror on his office wall he pours another whiskey and downs it. Then he takes a bottle of pills out of his jacket pocket and empties two into his hand.. he looks at them and then shakes another third one out and drinks them down with the whiskey

He opens the door to the office

"Donna!" He smiles at her sat at her desk already " you alright? I didn't hear you leave last night?"

She nods. "you fell asleep so I errrmmm…. I left your phone and keys on the side!"

he nods "thanks….. look errm …did you book that flight?"

"Yeah! yeah of course I did"

" Good! book another one …..for yourself… there's something I need you to do for me"

"Daniel?" she frowns "you alright?"

"No!...No Donna I'm in trouble and errrm… I need you help … will you help me?"

She gets up and puts her hands on his face "Daniel what is it?" she frowns looking at the worry in his face " you know I will….. I'll do anything for you .. you know that!" she holds his face and kisses him "but you're scaring me . what is it?"

"I can't tell you, but… I'm in big trouble and I need you to do some things for me.. things you won't like but …. will you do them?"

She frowns and watches him as he kisses her back. She nods her head "Yeah! yeah of course I will .. anything… you know that you only have to ask me!"

"Good .. good cos errm…." he kisses her again ".. . you know if I get this all sorted .. me and you… we'll go away .. somewhere nice" he smiles "beach ….cocktails … just you and me in a villa on the sand"

she smiles as she puts her arms round his neck "really.. just me and you"

"Yeah!.. yeah but errrm….before that can happen I need to sort this… I need to make this go away.. do you understand me?"

"Yes… Yes…whatever!... whatever it takes I'll help you; Daniel I ...I love you.. you know that!"

"Yeah!" he smiles "look we don't have much time so go book that flight and pack a bag...Oh! and errm.. ..you better book a hotel!"

"But ..but I booked you a suite, I thought I could .."

"No! .. no not yet… Donna it's safer… for you to be in another hotel.. Just for now!...I need you to trust me."

She nods "Okay .. if that's what you want"

He smiles and pushes her hair back off her shoulder "oh and errm ….Donna…. pack something sexy!"  
He smiles and kisses her

She smiles "okay!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They arrive a Virginia Beach and they pull up outside the block of suites where Daniel is staying  
"Okay!.. now the drivers going to take you to your hotel" He looks at his watch

She frowns seeing how agitated he seems to be "something wrong?"

"Oh errmm…. I was supposed to meet someone for a business breakfast .. I'm running late … don't worry… Just get to the hotel and I'll call you and tell you what to do!...like we discussed"

She nods "okay.. but Daniel I'm not sure about this .. do think it'll work.. I mean what if …."

"Shhh!...it'll work… just trust me! … you trust me don't ya?" he kisses her

"Yeah! …yeah I suppose… just is there no other way .. it just doesn't feel right doing this!"

"I know!... I know and I would never ask you to do this under normal circumstances but…" he sighs "I don't have time for any other way… and I'm.. we're in danger Donna, if you don't do this I don't know what else to do!" he bites his lip

"Okay! … yeah okay .. I understand .. you know I will do it … but just .. you'll be okay with this .. I mean after.. it doesn't change anything with me and you?"

"No! No of course not .. Donna I asked you to do this!" he frowns and looks at his watch "Look I have to go . . Go to the hotel have a .. Relax for a bit .. have a nice hot bubble bath, then text me!" He smiles and kisses her again

She smiles back "Okay!... I'll send you a picture of the bubbles"

He smiles "you do that... Here.." he hands her a small bag of white powder "enjoy yourself and relax"

She takes it and puts it in her purse as she kisses him "I love you!" she watches him

"Now be a good girl and go!"

He gets out and sends the driver on before he runs up the steps and leaves his bags with the porter "which way to the restaurant?.. I've got a meeting!" the porter points the way

He straightens his tie and hurries

He puts his hand round her eyes and kisses her neck  
"Mandy I am so sorry!.. my flight .. then I couldn't find my driver and… oh! its been a nightmare .. did you order?"

"No, I was about to leave .. I thought you stood me up!"

"Stand you up ? … why would I ever do that?... you're about to be my wife… I'd never do anything like that" He clicks his fingers to get the waiters attention "Coffee please and whatever my fiancé would like" he smiles as he takes her hand twisting her ring round

" **FIANCE?!"** Donna stands there frowning with his phone in her hand… she gulps "you errm…" she sighs "you left this in the car" she frowns at Mandy

Mandy frowns back "Daniel? what's going on? who's this?"

"Oh shit… errrm ….yeah errrrmm …" he stalls for a moment "errrm… Mandy this is errm… Donna my secretary.. Donna what _are you_ doing here?" he frowns at her " I thought you went to your hotel to unpack?"

"You left your phone in the car… I knew you couldn't contact me for the pictures you asked for without it!" she frowns at Mandy "Fiancé? ...you've never mentioned her before"

"Oh, err mm…."he gulps "Sorry!..

"I'm Mandy" she puts her hand out "Mandy Ellis pleased to meet you .. errr ...Donna? sorry Daniels never mentioned you before .. I guess there was no reason to mention his secretary but.."

Donna can feel the hurt and rage inside her building and Daniel can see it "I guess you're right .. he has no reason to mention me! but then he never mentioned you either!"

" can you just excuse me a minute Mandy I just have some business I need to discuss in private.. Donna this way!" 

"Sure. Shall I order?"

"Tell you what" he smiles "Why don't you go up to the suite and order breakfast there .. be a bit more private…I'll only be a few minutes and I'll come up?"

Donna frowns more

"Yeah sure .." he hands her the keycard "Nice to meet you Donna"

Donna takes a breath in holding her emotions back " likewise… oh by the way …congratulations" she stares at Daniel 

Mandy leaves and Daniel takes hold of her arm she pulls away

"get the hell off me .. what the hell is this? … you said me and you .. and now you have a fiancé? What the hell... are you just using me?"

"No! no Donna look at me... DONNA! .. I'm using her!"

"What? … don't bullshit me Daniel.. you asked her to marry you .. she has ring … you want me to help you .. to do _things_ for you..….. but you buy her a ring? What the hell you must think I'm stupid!"

He sighs "I needed to get her to trust me ..for god sake Donna this has taken a long time.." He sighs "Donna she's the only one gonna know how to open that damn file when I get it .. I need her to trust me do you understand?"

"By asking her to marry you?"

"Donna.. I don't want to marry her… it's just part of my plan… trust me!"

"NO! no I don't trust you… how do I know you're not lying to me?.. fooling me… instead of her and then when this is over .. you go off with her?"

" I thought you knew me Donna… I thought you loved me?"

He goes in his pocket and pulls out a small box "it's not real me asking her to marry me... .not when .. It's you … you…..you I wanted to ask"

he opens the box and huge diamond ring inside "I was keeping this till after.. till later…. once this is done.. but.. I guess now.. if you don't trust me then… I don't need this.. because you won't want to marry me will you?"

She sighs "Daniel What the hell?... I'm confused" she closes her eyes "this makes no sense.."

"No!... I know it doesn't and as I told you... I wouldn't ask but.. they're gonna kill me Donna if I don't get that file ..and I don't know what else to do now if you won't help me!"

"But all this planning how long has this been going on?"

He sighs  
"Catherine started this .. this is her fault… she wouldn't give me the damn file… I tried everything.. but .. every step, every damn threat I made she found a way to fight me… I couldn't take it anymore .. had one more chance to make her see sense" he sighs "I thought if I took her away from everything she wanted ..she'd finally give in and hand it over but .." he laughs " she still found a way out..!" he shakes his head  
"well now I know where it is… and she's not here to stop me! …but I need your help and if you can't help me then … I'm a dead man walking!"… he closes the box

"Wait!.." she nods "Yes! yes I'll marry you … and I'll help, of course I will. You know that! you know I love you.. I always have…" she goes to kiss him but he holds her back  
"Not here!"

"So was it Catherine … the reason you ended it .. before?" tears stream down her cheek

"look… my sister was difficult .. you know that .. but .. yeah .. she err mm….Hey! Hey, don't cry … look let me finish up here .. and I'll come meet you at the hotel as before …"

he takes the ring out and puts it on her finger "why don't you wear this tonight… then keep it safe" he smiles and looking around to make sure no one can see he quickly kisses her

She's smiling looking at the ring.

"Now ….go!.. run that bubble bath.. I won't be long!" he gives her one more kiss on the cheek

"Okay! Okay… but promise... don't be too be long" She hands him his phone and leaves.

He takes a big long sigh "Fuck!... Shit!" he rubs his head and goes the bar "whisky and make it a large one!" he knocks it back looks at his phone then heads to his suite.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Mandy!" he smiles "Sorry about that!... these PA's they get a little testy if you don't tell them everything.. I should have told her .. I just don't like discussing my private life with her!"

She frowns "Who are these guys ?"

"Oh, err mm … they work for me… they're err mm…. security" 

"Daniel what's going on? Why do you need security .. and why are they here… now?" She frowns she feels slightly nervous and anxious "Daniel I err mm …think I should get back to work .. perhaps we can do this later?" she stands up

"I don't think so!"

"What?" she smiles "I errm ….I have things to do!" she picks up her phone and one of the guys takes it off her

"Hey!.. . hey that's mine… you can't just .." 

"Sit down Mandy .. don't make this hard.. no one needs to get hurt.. but … if that has to happen …well…" he sighs

"What?" she frowns "Daniel whats going on?"

He pours another drink from the tray and takes some more pills out of his pocket then he sniffs as he turns to look at her holding his drink  
"Hayes has that file doesn't he .. that's what she sent him.. Catherine .. she sent him the list?" 

Mandy shakes her head and stands up again "What file?... list… what's this about your scaring me ..Daniel?" 

He turns on her "oh don't play innocent .. it doesn't suit you.. YOU know damn well what file .. So where is it? Did he give it to you already?"

"I don't know what you're talking about.. but No, no he didn't give me anything?" she shakes her head "Daniel I need to go"

He grabs her by the neck "Oh NO! I don't have time for this ... you're not going anywhere... not till Hayes gives me that file.. I need it!" 

"Daniel!" she puts her hands on his hands and screams 

He slaps her hard across he face which knocks her to the floor "Shut _her_ up!" 

"Daniel" she holds her face "what the hell's this about?"

He laughs "This? This is about me staying alive!"

She stares at him "and us? What about us?.. I thought you loved me… I thought you wanted to marry me"

He laughs "there is no us… what us... when you're in love with him anyway?"

"No!... no .. I loved you I thought you wanted me?"

"No, you're just a means to an end.. you're obsessed with him just the same way she was… that was her downfall protecting him.. . She never could get over him ..Don't let him be your downfall too" he laughs and drink his drink

"No! me and Jason are just friends .. that's all it could ever be….I ...I could never compete with her… Jason loved her totally!"

"Yeah well more fool him .. if she'd just got the old man to hand it over in the first place who knows…. she might still be here now!" he drinks some more "there'd have been no need for me to have done what I did!" He sighs.

The two burly guys tie Mandy's hands together and put a gag in her mouth

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Hey Jason… you wanna another drink? .. I'm getting one!"

" Yeah sure I'll have another beer!"

"two beers and two tequila chasers"

"oh no Sonny, I don't want tequila"

"who the hell said they were for you.." Sonny laughs " Hey.. you see over there… you're getting some doe eyes!"

"What?"

"The barfly over there.. giving you the big brown eye look.. Oh, come on man.. she been making eyes at you for the past half hour!"

"Really? I can't say I noticed!"

"Oh Jesus …Jason snap out of it .. have you looked at her… hmmm? you're gonna say no to that?" 

He looks up "yeah she's okay"

"Okay? .. Geez Jason .. if that's okay I don't know what you're looking for?!"

Jason turns and looks at him

Sonny shakes his head "yeah well she's not coming back the sooner you start to realise that the better … look man she.. she's hot .. you need to get in there.. get back on that saddle!"

"I'm okay!"

Sonny sighs "Jason.. you need to give it a chance… you 're gonna mope around forever?"

"I just .."

"Look she looks like a… one nighter.. maybe two .. so just have some fun.. you remember that .. relieve some tension.. then .. see how you feel… it doesn't have to be serious.. in fact, probably better if it's not!"

Jason laughs "Sonny…. why am I listing to you for relationship advice?"

"Cos I'm good at it .. well I'm good at the physical side… .. maybe not so much with the feels" he picks his beer up and necks back the two tequilas "Look I'm gonna go play pool with Clay .. why don't you buy the lady a drink?

"just a drink?"

"Well you gotta start somewhere, Right?!"

Jason nods "I'll see.. now go play!"

Jason looks up catching the woman's attention. He smiles and she smiles back  
 _"Oh shit! Shes looking at me"_ he downs the rest of his beer "Give me a shot of tequila!"

She puts her head down and bites her lip

 _"Fuck what am I doing .. Okay! Here goes nothing!"  
_ he knocks the Tequila shot back and pushes his stool out of the way. Takes a deep breath and heads over to her

He coughs "Service is slow in here"

She nods "yeah!.. yeah I noticed that!" she puts her head down slightly embarrassed

"Look I'm ..errm ….getting another drink in… Can I err mm… get you one?"

"You buying?" she smiles

"Yeah!...Yeah I guess I am" he smiles back

"Then sure .. I'll have vodka soda, thanks!"

"Okay" Jason sighs to himself _"that's at start"_ he turns around and Sonny looks at him and smiles then carries on with his head down to take his shot on the pool table.

There's this awkward silence as she smiles at him and he smiles back.

"So, you in the Navy?"

"Umm Humm!" he nods looking round not sure what to say

"something you've done for a while?"

"Yeah a few years now… and you?"

"Oh no I'm not in the Navy"

No … I .. it doesn't matter .. you play pool?" Jason's feeling slightly awkward one on one in conversation

"yeah… yeah sure I do… you asking?"

"Yeah!...I guess I am!"

She laughs "come on then!"

The game seems to help break the ice along with the several drinks they consume.

Sonny gets a couple of trays of shots in and then the chat starts to flow much better.  
Jason's watching her as she lines up for her shot and she looks up catching his eye. She smiles before hitting the last ball. It misses the pocket  
"guess you win .." she smiles at him

"Guess I do .. best of 5?"

"Yeah sure….Look I errrm…. I just need the ladies room why don't you get some more drinks in?"

"Okay!" he stands by the table and she has to push past him to go

A deep-down spark of excitement comes over him. It's the first time he's felt like that since CJ and he takes a deep breath thinking how it makes him feel while watches her thinking how sexy she is as she heads to the bathroom exit door.

Clay and sonny nod to each other and smile. Sonny coughs "so…."

"So... what you got a problem, Sonny?"

"No… neither will you have if you get back in that saddle"

"Maybe"

"Maybe.. hmmmm!...okay well…" he clinks beers "….maybe is better than no!" he laughs

As she heads into one of the cubicles and closes the door she put the pan lid down and takes a small plastic grip seal bag out of her purse. She pours some of the powder it contains onto the back of her hand and takes a quick sharp snort. Taking a few seconds gathering herself she rubs her nose then exits and washes her hands.

Looking at herself now in the mirror taking in her reflection, she fixes her makeup and takes the small ring box out of her purse and opens it running the tip of her finger over the large diamond stone.  
She smiles then snaps the box shut and puts it back in her purse, straightens her hair then taking a deep sigh as she looks at herself one more time in mirror  
"One step at a time Donna. You can do this _!"_

o-o-o-o-o-o-o


	68. Chapter 68

**Chapter 68: You better start talking**

" _Mmmmm!..._ Oh god! _uuuhhhh!_ " she sighs as she manages to get free from his lips "Jason!… _mmm!_ ….. _oh!...Oh!..._ slow down!….. _mmmm!_ "  
she's breathless as Jason's all over her, kissing her neck pushing her against the side of his truck stood in his driveway she puts her hand to his lips "Hey!... slow down" she smiles

He has his hands are in her hair, locked on kissing her as she puts her hand on his chest and holds him back

"Woah!... let's get inside first" she smiles.

"Okay!" kisses her again as he tries to get the key in the front door to the house fumbling with it while he lets his passion spill over on her mouth

"Here give it to me!" she laughs. He pulls her hair to one side and kisses the back of her neck as she puts the key in the lock "Jason... just wait...!

" _sshh !"_ He puts his finger to her lips "don't wake them up!... come on…. my rooms through here!"

"Wake them up? Who" she frowns "who's here?"

"shhh! My kids and my Mom" seeing her frown he kisses her again " it's okay… it's no problem…. don't worry!"

"are you sure?" she frowns uncomfortable at the thought of being here now "I mean … should we be here? What if they wake up?... I wouldn't want them to find me here… it's…"

"It's fine!" he looks her in the face and kisses her "it's fine!... trust me" he smiles

She gulps "trust you!...Yeah!" she sighs and nods she gives him a half hearted smile remembering Daniel asked her to trust him too. Remembering this is why she was here. Here with a man, although very attractive who in different circumstances she might be happy to be with but right now a man she didn't want to be with. This wasn't her choice

" _phewww!"_ he sighs looking her in the eyes _"_ You are so…." he kisses her more and more "come on .. its fine"

" wait! ….No!... Jason wait! please." she pushes his hands off her hips "I need a moment" she gulps unsure as she looks at his face with a million-thought running through her head

"oh god …..Donna…. I … " he has his hands all over her waist and running them down the sides of her body " _ahhh!"_ all his kissing and touching is very rushed and frenzied. He wants her so badly right now

"Woah!..." she takes a breath "…..Jason.. slowdown .. there's no hurry is there?"

He looks her in the eyes as stands with her pushed up against the living room wall. He starts to hitch her skirt up

"Wait!.." she pulls it down again "just give a minute…..I need to catch my breath …should we go through to your room first like you said wouldn't want to wake anyone"

"Yeah you're right.. sorry….I'm getting carried away"

"Hey!...Its okay ..but there's no rush!" she puts her hand on his cheek watching him she bites her lip and sighs 

He frowns watching her eyes, seeing the doubt in them "What's wrong?"

"Nothing I just .. _hmmm!_.. just slow down!" she smiles nervously trying to reassure him

"You don't want this?" Jason frowns again "you want me to stop?"

"It's not that.. just … you know.. errm… we just met… I mean errm ….. _phewww!_ I don't know I just need a minute" she rubs her head and untangles herself from his hold " this is .. just can we just slow-down?"

"Okay!.. ". he tries to kiss her again and she bites her lip and closes her eyes not responding back this time

"Sorry!... its fine .. I'm just…" she leans back and sighs "I just need a minute … can I use the bathroom?"

"Yeah sure it's through here.. I'll show you" he frowns concerned now wondering what he did wrong as she seemed so up for this at the bar

Jason stands in the kitchen doorway taking a breath while she uses the bathroom

he runs his hands through his hair "What the fuck!" he bends down taking a moment to think _"phewwwww!"_ he leans back against the door frame "shit!" He shakes his head " _what the hell did I do?"_

 _o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o_

She stands in the bathroom gathering her thoughts looking at herself in the mirror. "Shit!" she sighs as she looks at her phone then hits call on Daniels contact number  
"Shit!...oh Shit!" she sighs as she then cuts it off and sits on the side of the bath debating what to do

Jason takes a beer out of the fridge and for a second he hears CJs voice in his head  
" Fuck! What the hell am I doing?" he bites his lip he looks round as Donna comes out of the bathroom "you alright?"

She nods "Yeah!... look I'm sorry!"

"It's fine.. I'm sorry…" he frowns worried "I know I was rushing it a bit … it's just... I thought this is what you wanted?"

"Yeah! yeah .. just .. _phewww!_ " she lets out a long sigh "It was just a bit intense .. for a moment!"

"yeah!... sorry it's just errm….. you're the first person .. I've errmmm.. .. well it's been a while and errmm …" 

she wanders round the living room browsing things and picks up a photo of Jaycee and Emma  
"Yeah!... I'm sorry I guess it must be difficult after everything with …" she frowns looking at the picture "these your kids?" she turns the photos towards him stalling the conversation

"yeah two of them" he frowns

 _"he's grown …"_ she says under her breath as she puts it back down

"what? …are you okay?... after everything?" he frowns "after what?"

"Errm.. nothing .. no nothing !"

"No what did you mean, after everything?"

" I don't know it just came out!...sorry .. I just… _hmmmm!"_

Jason's sensing something wrong " Whats going on here… first you want this .. now you don't ? …is there something I should know?"

She puts her head down as she slowly turns to face him "I'm sorry…. I can't do this" she rubs her head and tries not to cry then sits herself on the couch head in her hands "I'm sorry…. I'm so sorry….you must understand I never wanted this"

Jason frowns "Okay?... fine.. look I'm sorry l….. I just thought .. Look I can take you back to your hotel or .. get you a cab?"

"No! I mean .. all of it ..I'm sorry for this…. but I didn't know what else to do!"

"Wait what?" he frowns confused "what am I missing ?... is there something going on here?"

"you have to understand …..I didn't' want to do this .. but….."

"but what?" 

She gulps "but he said there was no choice .. I just … " she starts to cry "Oh shit! .. I don't know what to now!"

"Right you better start talking. What the hell's going on here?"

"Daniel. He said …."

"DANIEL?!….wait Daniel … CJs brother?...Okay right start talking.. what the hell's he got to do with this? .. do you know him?"  
a fearful panic starts to rise inside Jason bringing her here into his family home. "you're not making sense … start talking Donna!... I swear you better tell me what this is about"

"yeah…. Yeah Catherine, CJs, brother… I'm his… well I guess I'm _just_ his PA…." she wipes her nose on her hand "but he told he loved me.. that I needed to do this to help him .. that there was no other way…. "

"Way for what? .. what did he want you to do?"

"he said they were gonna kill him… that you have something he needs that will stop them….. he wanted me to find it"  
She goes in her purse

"Woah wait!…" Jason panics for a moment that she may have a gun in her purse "what the hell are you doing?" he steps back

"It's okay!..." she holds a tissue up out of the bag with a pill wrapped inside "I was supposed to give you this… and then… oh god! I'm sorry… " she closes her eyes thinking about what she was supposed to do  
"then look for it…...I didn't know your kids were here! .. I swear.. I wouldn't have hurt them!"  
she puts her head in her hands and sobs uncontrollably "just…..in the end I couldn't do it… .. you're so nice….and it's not like you're not attractive .. but…..I couldn't go through with it .. and knowing what you've been through ….. oh god!"  
she puts her head in her hands again the wipes her nose with the back of her hand " they're gonna kill him now aren't they?"

"I don't know .. I don't know what's going on here"

she closes her eyes as the tears flow " I can't believe asked me to do this. .. you know I thought he loved me…" she looks up at Jason with his pitiful look on her face ".. over the years he's …." She shakes her head "…I should have known better… the way he is .."  
she looks up at Jason again "I've been so stupid ..but I was so angry when found out that woman was his fiancé .. I just wanted him back ….I thought I would do anything for him but… I can't do this!"

Jason frowns at her "What woman?... Mandy?"

She nods " You know he was so convincing he got this …." she opens the ring box she has in her purse " .. he told me he wanted to marry me, not her!" .. she cries "I'm so pathetic .. what the hell did I get involved in" she looks at him pitifully "Why did I listen to him?"

"Alright calm down…. Look we can fix this, but I need to know everything .. where is he and who's after him?"

"I don't know who …. but I left him in his suite ... he had that Mandy with him…" she looks down as the tears drip on her lap "..you must think I'm pathetic …..believing him .. doing what he wanted .. but you don't know him .." she sighs " maybe I don't either now!"

"No .. but …Donna when you love someone you don't always think clearly .. Shit! I know that better than most" he takes a moment thinking "so where is he?"

"I told you a suite at the Regency .. I can give you the address.. What's gonna happen to me now? .. am I gonna be in trouble? Oh god!..will I go to prison?"

Jason shakes his head and sits round in front of her "look at the moment you haven't done anything .. he picks up the pill " you didn't go through with this .. so, if you tell me everything .. there should be no need for you to be involved… okay?"  
he puts his hand round the back of her neck and pulls her towards him he can see how upset she is, and he kisses the top of her head "it's gonna be alright.. I just need to make sure Mandy's okay!"

He picks up the phone "Ray!...yeah look I know what time it is .. I'm sorry but I need you to meet me at the base .. get the others .. somethings happened…. I think Mandy's in trouble "

Donna frowns and takes a deep breath "What're you gonna do?"

"I don't yet .. but I gotta get Mandy away from him first… you need to come with me to the base"

"why .. I thought you said .. I hadn't done anything?"

"I'm sorry" he sighs " I can't afford to take a chance that you might contact him"

"I won't I promise… I just want this to be over"

"Then you need to come with me and once it's over .. then .. you can go!... till then .. I need to know where you are"

She frowns " I'm scared. What if these people come after me? "

"you're gonna be fine we'll protect you!"

"Jason… I'm am sorry.. I didn't mean for this .. I should have said something before I should have said no!" she cries again

"Shit!" Jason takes a deep breath and rubs his head while he paces the room

Donna looks round at him standing in front of the photos on the shelf. She watches him as he picks up the photo she picked up earlier  
"You know he looks like her… the photo… oh, he looks like you as well… but ….you can definitely see her"

Jason laughs "yeah.. he acts like her as well" he shakes his head smiling to himself "You knew CJ?"

"Catherine?" she frowns puzzled hearing her called that "Yeah!" she sniffs and wipe her nose  
"from the office.. she didn't like me much"

Jason laughs "she didn't like anyone much!"

"She didn't want me seeing Daniel... the more she didn't want it …the more he went against her … I guess I should have listened to her .. she told me once me he'd hurt me… said it was in his nature… he had a chip on his shoulder, that he was never good enough for their father….I thought she was just being spiteful…god she could be spiteful…"

she pauses thinking as she looks back up at Jason  
"I guess she knew him better than me" she takes a deep breath in " Shit! What a mess .. could I have a drink?"

"Yeah sure….but we need to head out in minute"

Linda comes to the doorway

"Jason, what's going on?"

"Nothing go back to bed"

She frowns at Donna sitting there crying "Is everything alright?"

"Yeah mom just go back to bed… I have to go back out "

She looks at them both and frowns "As long as you're sure?"

"Yeah I'm sure"

"Alright,... good night son!" she frowns as she reluctantly leaves

"Your mother?"

He nods and sighs " look we need to go"

He's still trying to reach Mandy on the phone  
"she's still not answering … Mandy .. its Jason please call me back its urgent I need to speak to you!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Mandy wriggles on the seat "why are you doing this I thought we had something? I thought you loved me?"

He squats down beside her and tucks her hair back behind her ear "I did… just .. I'm sorry but I need that list … If I could do this any other way… I am sorry… and for what its worth I did care about you, a great deal!"

" So, let me go you don't need me!"

"but I do!... I need you to open that file when Hayes hands it over"

"You know I can't ..I don't know how …. there's only one person can and she's not here"

"We'll see!"

"No! no we won't because I can't. Do what you want to me, but I can't open it … Daniel why are you doing this?... this is not you!"

He shakes his head "Because I must!...Now shut the fuck up!" he pours another drink

"No Daniel…. let me help you .. I can protect you. Just let me help!... this is the not helping you "

"You can't! you can't protect me not from this. No one can… now shut up before I have to do something I regret!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Ray arrives followed by Sonny with Clay, then Brock and Trent

"I brought the box like you asked!" Clay frowns as he puts the security box on the desk "Jason what's going on?"

Sonny frowns as he sees Donna sitting on the couch in the corner crying "Okay whats going on? You bringing your dates to work now?... what's this about?... Why's she here?"

" don't worry about her at the…let's just say someone's coming after that!" he points at the small metal box

"What?" Clay frowns "What the hell… who? .. Jason what the hell's going on?"

Jason sighs "Daniel

"Mandy's fiancé?" Sonny looks at him confused "Why … what? Why didn't he just get that off CJ in the first place?"

Jason sighs "I think Mandy might be in trouble… I can't get hold of her! That's not like her not answering her phone"

"So, do we know where _he_ is?"

"At some hotel suite"

"So, we go get him there?"

"No! no we can't not without attracting attention to ourselves"

Ray runs his hand through his beard " So we lure him somewhere else"

Jason looks at Ray "what you thinking?"

"well he wants that box….. or I'm guessing whatever's in it…. we tell him he can have it, lure him out.. if he has got Mandy...hopefully he'll bargain?  
"

Jason nods "we need to find out where Mandy is first …. But my guess is … he knows the answer to that! I need to know she's alright!"

"Yeah sure! .. have we tried pinging her phone?" Ray chews his gum frowning and looking at Donna

"I'll get Davis to do it" Clay looks up "what else do you want us to do?"

"we need to find out if he's still at the hotel .. get Davis to run a check on his phone as well…. and see who he's been calling" Jason runs his hands through his hair "Goddamn it…. CJ told me not to trust him ..I guess I should have taken more notice.."

he puts his key in the box and indicates to Clay for him to do the same  
"..we need to end this once and for all"

"You're not gonna give him this are you?"

Jason ignores clay and picks up his phone  
"Mandy when you get this…. call me urgently . Daniels he's .. he's not who you think.. you need to call .. please"

he sighs and turns to Donna  
"you better start talking and tell us exactly what you know!"

She gulps and shrugs "I don't know anything .. that's the truth... all he said was he needs a file that you have… that he's in serious trouble … that someone's coming after him … but I don't know who!" she shakes her head "that's the truth" she frowns "he wanted me to get to close to you.. so, I could look for it … he said he knows Catherine sent it to you?"

"How does he know that?" the only person I told was…" Jason thinks and frowns "….was Matt…but he wouldn't have told him… he was the one told me what he was like.. No! no he wouldn't have said!"

She shakes her head "I don't know I haven't spoken to Matt since he wanted to go to the house because I gave him the keys.. but "she thinks "…but… Oh my god…. then Daniel had the keys.."  
she frowns as she tries to think "I remember I thought it was strange when they fell out of his pocket that night in the office… How did he get the keys back off Matt.? If he didn't know Matt had been to the house?"

Jason sighs and rubs his foreheads "Nothing makes sense here!"

She jumps and sits up as her phones rings while they are mid conversation. She stares at the screen "Oh shit!" she looks at it and takes a deep breath in  
"It's Daniel….what do you want me to do?"

Jason thinks for a moment "answer it… but you don't tell him anything about me knowing"

She nods "okay… what do .."

"Just answer"

"Hello"

"Can you talk?"

She looks up at Jason who puts it on speaker phone and nods

"Yeah!" she bites her lip her heart is racing and her voice quivers in fear

"Where's Hayes?"

She gulps "he's asleep .." she lies. It makes her hands start to shake " I'm in the bathroom"

"Good … did you get it?"

She look at Jason who's thinking he nods "say yes!" he mouths to her

She pauses for moment not answering

"Donna!?… you there.. did you get it?"

She swallows hard before she answers "Yes!.. yes, I've got it!"

" _Phewwww!_ … Thank god. good girl.. did everything go fine?.. you're all right.." he smiles to himself "can you bring it to me?... now, at the suite" 

Jason shakes his head he grabs a piece of paper "tell him you're scared and you wanna meet"

"No! …. No Daniel.. I'm scared …. I wanna meet somewhere else somewhere more public!" she shrugs at Jason _"where?"_

"Why?" Daniel frowns "Donna, just come to the suite it's fine"

"No sorry! .. this...this has gone too far .. how do I know I'm gonna be safe... how do I know….." she hears a sudden noise in the background like a muffled scream "what was that?"

"Nothing!" Daniel turns putting his hand over the phone "shut her the hell up!"

Jason listens to the sounds on the speaker phone and looks up at Donna then round at his team

"he's got Mandy!"

Daniel catches Jason's' voice over the speaker "Donna is someone there with you?" he frowns and laughs as he realises "Donna where did you say Hayes was? Did you give him that pill I gave you?"

"yes .. yes … I told you he's asleep" she gulps "I gave him it like you said"

Daniel thinks for a moment "is her there with you?"

"Daniel .. He's asleep!... I told you!... look I'll call you back .. I need to go" her hands are shaking she can't speak her mouth is dry with fear

"Donna!.. Donna!..." the phone goes dead on him "FUCK! Fuck Shit!" he rubs his head "Shit! ...NO!... I need that file!" he's really angry now 

Donna looks at Jason "I'm sorry .. I can't… I just can't speak to him!"

"What now?" Ray looks at Jason who's stands grinding his teeth

"You call him back!...You tell him you want to meet!"

She gulps she shakes he head "I can't. I'm scared… What the hell did I get in to?"

"You're gonna do it!" he's in front of her now and not happy "Mandy's in trouble.. you wanted to know what was gonna happen to you .. well you fix this, and I'll make sure you're okay.. I promise. Just trust me" he stares her eye to eye

She nods tearfully at him "okay… okay!.. Yeah" she sniffs back her tears "…. where do you want me to tell him?"

Jason sighs as he looks round at Ray "if he has got Mandy we need to get him out in the open" 

Ray frowns at the map on the screen in front of him as he thinks "what about the old dock yards where …"

"No! no we're not going there!" Sonny looks at Clay. "Not there!"

Clay looks up "Sonny .. it's fine!.. I'll be fine I can deal with it"

"No Clay!.. look you still have nightmares now… they choose a different location!"

"Sonny really its fine. … Jason it's fine!"

"Look brother... I know what you're saying but...we know that location … the layout.. there's high vantage points for over watch…Look I'm sorry man" Ray looks at Sonny "but at short notice it's the best option we've got….it's your call Jason!"

Jason stands with his arms folded he sighs "You got your head right with this?" he frowns at Clay

Clay nods "Yeah.. .it'll be fine.. I'm good .. honest"

Sonny sighs and shakes his head

"fine! Ray give her the address!... now you call him!"

"What do I tell him?"

"you tell him your scared and you want to meet here that you'll get a taxi who'll wait for you!"

She picks up her phone... "sorry I thought I heard a noise... Daniel … I'll meet you .. I have an address .. out the back of the old dock yards"

Daniel thinks for a moment then frowns "put him on the phone!"

"What?.. Daniel I don't know what you're talking about . I told you he's…."

He interrupts her " yeah you said he's asleep… Now l said PUT … HIM …ON … THE phone!" he's angry now realising that she's not gone through with his plan

She looks at Jason unsure what to do

"Shit!" He closes his eyes realising that Daniel knows its a set up. He was hoping to use the element of surprise. He grabs the phone off her

"Mr Hayes are you there?...Can you hear me?"

Jason pauses for a moment then he sighs and answers "Yeah I'm here…" he takes a long sigh "I wanna speak to Mandy"

Daniel laughs "Mandy oh Yes… beautiful Mandy…unfortunately .. shes a little tied up at the moment.. you send Donna with that file and I'll let her go"

"No Donna's not going anywhere!"

"I won't hurt her .. you have my word!"

"What you'll give me your word will you?... your word means jack to me! Now you let Mandy go .. she's got nothing to do with this"

"No… I can't do that … see I think she has… you went to her .. for her to open that file so… I think I'll disagree for now"

"She can't open it .. no one can … the two people that can… are dead" he swallows hard and closes his eyes its not often he can say out loud those words _"she's dead"_ and it still stings when he does

"No! .. Catherine wasn't stupid… if she sent you it … she would have left a way… Mandy's clever … she'll find that way to open it"

"You can have the file…. its worthless… just let Mandy go!"

He sighs "You know I never wanted Mandy involved in this .. never wanted to hurt her.."he turns and looks at her " I did really love her ..do you know when I knew that… when Catherine wanted to kill her… I couldn't let her do that.. you know Catherine was always so jealous… the thought of anyone being with you… you she would have gone to any lengths to protect you ... in fact she'd give her life" he laughs "but ..I guess me, and Mandy were not meant to be"

Jason can sense him trying to get under his skin but he keeps himself calm "Look you're in trouble.. let us help you .. let Mandy help you.. she can protect you.. get you witness protection"

Daniel laughs "No one can protect me now…. You don't know what's on that list…. the people .. the people coming after me… they'll get to me….they have people involved …everywhere… the only thing that can protect me _is_ me having that list.. it protected Catherine all this time"

"Yeah but that's cos she knew what was on it… you think they'll let you live once you hand it over?"

He laughs "No .. but I'm not handing it over to them…I have a private plane loaded and ready to go.. I just need that file first... and you're gonna give it to me! or your _friend_ Mandy is going to disappear forever!"

Ray's scanning the map for private airfields while Jason talks. He circles a couple of possible on the map as him and Clay start to look them up

Jason sighs "Let me speak to Mandy"

"What? No .. I don't think so .."

"How do I even know you've got her?... I wanna know she's alright. I'm not talking to you anymore till I know that"

Daniel looks back at her and sighs "Very well!" he unties Mandy's gag and puts the phone to her head

"Jason?" she sighs

"Mandy You okay?"

"Yeah! Yeah I'm okay... Jason don't let him have it …. You need to protect it .. don't do what he wants"

"Shut up! …..Just shut up!" Daniel pulls her hair back and takes the phone away

"you know I loved you Mandy… but Reuben told me you were a fool.. he said you were gullible.. you wanted love in your life to fill that hole you made with your career… he said that's what made you an easy target" he laughs "guess it was" he rubs her cheek "but strangely, I did fall in love with you.. so, don't make me hurt you"

"Get the hell off me!...You say you loved me? Then you do this … you set your sister up didn't you?" she frowns at him "you were the one all along... she protected you .. you son of a bitch"

Daniel slaps her hard across the face "Shut the hell up! you don't know anything... my sister" he laughs " she was a manipulative bitch..." he's seething with anger now and he shouts down the phone at Jason  
"You need to bring that damn file….. where I tell you … or …. Or .. well just bring it"

The phone goes dead and Jason looks around at the team. Donna starts to cry.  
A text comes through on her phone with the location of a private airfield

Jason sighs as he looks at the message  
"Alright... let's get geared up.." he takes the flash drive out of the box. Clay looks at Sonny they don't say a word "we need to go get Mandy back from this son of a bitch!"


	69. Chapter 69

Chapter 69: Back safe

 **I know Ive said before many times but... maybe this is the END now! :)**

"Bravo 6, Bravo 2, Do you copy?... Are you in position?"

The airfield is dark and the shiny white can be made out in the moonlight. Jason is positioning Ray and Spenser. Kairos is tasked with laying charges to take the front wheel of the jet Should something go wrong and they try to take off.

"This is Bravo 6. Copy, clear line of sight to the aircraft"

"Bravo 2, copy. Good position on target"

"Bravo 3 cover Bravo 7. ... 7 get those charges laid. You sure this is going to work?"

"Copy that Bravo 1 Yeah! We take out the front wheel with out risking the passengers onboard, it's going nowhere … Rest is up to you boys" Kairos smiles at Sonny there something about Kairos that annoys Sonny, but for some reason he still kind of likes him.

"4 and 5 you go around. Cover the vehicles. They may use that as another escape route"

"Hey Jace… " Trent frowns "You gonna be on your own out there. You gonna be okay?"

Jason flips the flash drive in his hand and sighs "We've got no choice… we gotta try and get Mandy back …alive"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Everyone's in position now and they sit silently in the dark waiting for what seems like ages not moving just silently watching. Jason sighs and looks at his watch "Bravo 7 give me a sit rep"

"Yeah going good .. gonna need a few minutes longer Copy"

"Copy that"

Jason looks up as he hears sounds of vehicles arriving on the tarmac "Looks like times up … you need to work faster"

"Copy that. I'm on it!"

Jason watches as the car doors open "All Bravo call signs…Heads up. Targets arrived"

As the black Sudan car doors open, Daniel steps out with Mandy at gun point. He looks nervous and keeps looking around suspiciously. His heart is racing in anticipation for whats about to unfold. He wonders if his senses are down from the drink and drugs he took earlier and whether he should have cut back.

"Bravo 2, Bravo 6. Do you have him in sight? Copy."

"Bravo 1 this is 6. I have him in sight clear. Shot is within range"

"This is 2 …I've got visual but no clear shot"

"Okay 6 you have the lead. When you can take the shot ..Do it! We go on your mark"

"Copy that!"

Jason takes a deep breath and steps out into the light from the car headlights but just as he does the screech of more cars can be heard coming into range  
"Anyone got visuals" Jason drops to the floor.

He hears the car closing in and sees as Daniel grabs Mandy closer to him

"Damn it! Bravo 4 you have visuals"

"Copy that. We got a vehicle approaching at speed. No visuals on the occupants so far"

"What the hell?" Jason wonders to himself as he lays still in the grass, watching as the vehicle pulls up

Daniel steps over as if it's someone he knows, and he lets go of Mandy for a moment

Bravo team can't make out who he's talking to, but what seems quite a short man steps out of the new vehicle.  
Jason can see Mandy looking around. She's guessing, or at least hoping Bravo are here. She does, however, recognise the occupant of the vehicle and she takes a breath wondering what's going to happen.

Jason watches he can make out Daniel talking with the occupant and what looks like three bodyguards from the vehicle and they are shaking their heads and look to be arguing.

Suddenly there's a loud crack of a gun and Bravo all look round.

Daniel drops to the floor

"All call signs. Anyone got a sitrep"

"Nothing .. so far . vehicle blocking my sight"

"This is Bravo 4 I can see some heavily armed tangos just got out of the car. I count 3 … ones just shot our target"

"What the hell… Shit!" Jason rubs his head wondering "What's going on?Any idea who they are?"

"No .. not so far… but by the looks of him .. my guess would be cartel"

"Bravo 7 give me a sitrep.. How you doing with that aircraft?"

Kairos is squatting down behind the front wheel of the aircraft trying to still work on the explosive charge trying not to be seen  
"Yeah Bravo 1" he quietly whispers "need few more minutes .. pretty tricky here without being spotted"

"Copy that Bravo 7 .. Do what you can. We can't let that plane take off…. Bravo 6 we have eyes on our target"

"Targets on the ground. I'm not sure what's happening but he does appear to still be alive"

"Bravo 2 you got a sitrep?"

"Copy Bravo 1. I'm gonna try move. I've still got vehicle blocking my view"

"Copy that Bravo 2. Update sitrep ASAP "

Mandy steps back in fright as the shot is fired but now as the short stocky guy steps forwards to stand over Daniel she confirms her first thoughts of the shooter she recognised.

Julio Martinez. He's been on the news for weeks now after the DEA extradited him to the US for numerous drug and money laundering charges.  
He comes up on her own wanted lists many times before.

The recent case by the DEA has been the best to date to put him away for life after he killed 3 DEA agents.  
He hinted he had major connections high up in government departments, but so far as she knows no links could be substantiated. She's guessing that's why he wants that list as he was trying to cut a deal before a trial could go ahead.

She knows he would be someone Daniel was very afraid of for him to go this far.

Daniel looks up from the ground "Please Mr Martinez I'm getting it for you .. they're coming just give me a few more minutes. They ll be here!"

"What makes you so sure they 'll come with it?"

Daniel looks back at Mandy "Her!... They'll come for her"

Martinez laughs and shakes his head. "They'll give up the list for a woman? I think not.. you know I preferred dealing with your sister… she was much less ...pathetic than you. … Much stronger willed she would never have given it up….. she never did despite what it cost her…. So, you say they'll come for her?"  
He looks at his watch "It's too late Mr Lewis. I warned you. I wanted that list" he picks up his gun again and points it at Daniel's head this time

"Please .. I can get it … they'll be here soon. I promise. They will come for her!"

"So….. You say they are coming.. for her… what is she to them?"

Daniel gulps as he thinks about what to say but as he sees the gun raise again. He has no qualms in giving him information.  
Catherine might have been stronger to resist but he can't. He speaks quickly "She's CIA … they ll come for her"

"CIA? What! You bring her here? What the hell!"

"It was a deal I cut… to get you the list .. the person who has it .. he 'll come for us!"

"Why will he come for you?"

"We have history… he blames me for .. for my sister's death .. I swear he'll come with the list for _her"_

"Well .. if you say he'll come for her… then I don't need you!"

No … Please Wait!"

But it's too late there's no waiting just another loud crack from the gun and everyone stands still.  
Daniels body drops back lifeless. Martinez walks over to Mandy. He runs his gun up her arm .. "This true ..you CIA?"

She shakes her head "No! .. he lied, I'm his secretary" Mandy takes all her fear and pushes it to one side. If he believes Daniel in any way she will find herself next to him. He has to believe she is nothing.

Martinez frowns for a moment before he hits Mandy across the face with the gun knocking her to the ground  
"Don't lie to me.. I saw the look in his eyes thinking he was going to die .. he didn't lie. You are CIA and once they come… I will kill you the same as I did those DEA agents"

Martinez looks around "Where are they? .. They're here some where I can tell"

He searches out into the darkness wondering if he can spot any movement  
"What are they? .. DEA? .. Yours? .. No .. something more" he looks around again.  
He points his gun at Mandy and calls out "SHOW YOURSELF!. .. she is dead anyway … or maybe .. you give me what I want .. I let her go?"

Kairos readies his weapon. He's exposed under the plane. He holds his breath as he sets the final charge on the front wheel, but he needs to move back into the shadows to be out of range when he sets it off

Jason whispers into his radio "Bravo 6 you got a clear shot of target?"

"Not yet!"

"Dammit!" Jason rubs his head "Okay when you do you take it!"

Jason rubs his face he's not sure who he's negotiating with now or how predictable they are. He definitely thinks Ray was right. He sounds like cartel.  
While he's laid there wondering whether to get up and show himself he's distracted by a sudden sound of sirens and cars approaching at speed.

"What the hell?" Jason looks over towards the plane _"Who the hell are these guys?"_ he frowns and gets back on his radio "Anyone got visuals"

The cars pull up and a series of people get out, one with a loud hailer

" MARTINEZ!….. This is Agent Powell…. Put your weapons down and get on your knees"

"Oh Shit!" Jason rubs his head "BRAVO 6 you got a clear shot yet?"

"Negative Bravo 1"

"BRAVO 2, can you get a target shot?"

"Just getting in position .. Copy, I have target in sight"

"You get clear shot you take it. Copy that Bravo 2"

"Copy that"

"Bravo 7 get out of there! .. Last thing we need is you get spotted or hit in the crossfire"

"Copy that BRAVO 1 .. job is done. Charges loaded and ready"

"Copy that get out BRAVO 7….. Bravo 6 do you have eyes on the target yet?"

"Still negative, BRAVO 1"

"BRAVO 2 you have the lead. Take the shot when ready… We go on your mark"

"Copy that Bravo 1….on 3" Ray positions himself and sets up is angle ready to take the shot as he listens to Martinez answering the DEA agents back

"Agent Powell… it's always a pleasure .. but not this time!" as he moves to grab Mandy who stepped away from him as far as she safely can.

Ray readies himself "3…2…..1."

A shot rings out through the darkness and Martinez drops to the floor.

"What the hell!?" The DEA agents look around trying to scan where the sound came from they get down for safety behind the cars  
"Were the hell did that shot come from?" the lead agent frowns and gets on the radio "We have multiple shooters on scene"

All the other agents look around, but no one knows where it came from. Suddenly they find themselves under fire from the other men, Martinez's bodyguards.

"Shit!" Agent Powell and the rest of the DEA agents start to fire back

Another one of the targets drops to the floor as Clay lets off a clear shot.

Sonny runs forward and grabs Mandy over his shoulder taking her to safety.

The other two of the cartel men, finally see they're outnumbered and with Martinez dead they surrender their weapons and put their hands up. The DEA agents move in to arrest them.

"Wait!" Agent Powell looks around still unsure where the other shots were fired from.  
It's then she spots Bravo  
"What the … Why the hell is there a SEAL team moving in on Martinez?...Reynolds find out what's going on here!"

As the shots cease Jason moves forward while Clay and Ray pack up their positions. Kairos starts to defuse the charges he laid.

Agent Powell goes striding over towards them "Who the hell's in charge here?"

The sound of her female voice calling out cause Bravo to turn around. Sonny nudges Jason to get his attention but he's busy on the radio mic.

"HAVOC this is BRAVO 1 do you copy?"

"Copy BRAVO 1"

"We have Agent Ellis secured… I repeat Mandy is secure"

"Copy Bravo 1.. please be advised CIA agents are on route…. Wait for sitrep"

"HAVOC … be advised we have other agencies on scene"

"BRAVO 1. Do not co-operate at this time. Copy"

"Copy that HAVOC"

"I said who the hell's in charge here?"  
She's standing in front of them now but everyone looks away avoiding her gaze. Only Jason steps forward to look at her

"This to do with you?... Martinez in a body bag! .. Is it you I have to thank for killing my operation?" she stands staring at Jason who doesn't answer. He just looks her up and down.  
"Who the hell do you think you are, hmmm?... Swanning in here doing this.. Under whose authority?"  
He still doesn't answer her questions. She watches his face and he hers. He sees how angry she is  
"He was mine!.. My operation….Are you even listening?"

Jason still doesn't answer her, and he can see the even more angry look in her face building up. As he opens his mouth to speak she takes a swing and lands a punch on his chin

"Woah there!"  
Sonny steps in and pushes her back as Jason steps back. Part of him nearly lashes back but he manages to contain himself

"Hey little lady just calm down" Sonny still has his hand holding her back as Jason steps forward again  
"What the fuck!" he rubs his face "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

Sonny looks at Ray and laughs "That was some serious right hook!" Jason looks round and glares at him. He lowers his eyes to the floor trying not to laugh by avoiding eye contact

"Do you know how long I've worked on this case?...Well do you ?.. No! No, you don't!" she grits her teeth she's so angry "You swan in here and take out my target! .. Who the hell gave you authority?"

She frowns as another car comes speeding in and two men in suits jump out holding up badges "Special agent North and Devan.. We will be taking over this scene"

"What the hell?" she frowns not quite catching the details on their badges "Taking over?... Who gave you the right?...Hey!" she tries to stop them as they start giving out orders "Give me the name of your superiors.. I need to find out what's going on here!"

She steps in front of them trying to get their attention  
"This was my case.. I've been working on this for 18 months….Hey!.. Are you listening to me?" she stares at them, but they ignore her "I wanna know _WHO_ gives you authority to take over?"

"Please excuse us Agent Powell, we need to do our jobs!"

"What the hell?" she looks confused that they know who she is, but she hasn't a clue who they are

"Get Somerville on the phone I wanna know whats going on here!" she paces back and forward as a black van arrives with more guys in suits

She frowns even more as she watches BRAVO gather their stuff together and load up into the truck that's arrived in front of them

"Agent Powell?"

"Yes!" she spins round to face the guy in the suit "Hey!... Where are you going with him?" she sees them putting Martinez body in a bag and loading it into a van

"Agent Powell!... Can you come with us please!"

"What? .. No!" they grab her by the arm "I'm afraid we need to insist"

"What… I said No! Where the hell are you taking me?"

"I'm sorry Agent Powell but for now you need to come with us"

"What? .. Wait! .." she stops firmly where she's standing "Where are we going?"

"All will be explained at the debrief … you too Sir!" he looks at Reynolds, and the other agent next to her who both just shrug and comply

"No! you tell me what the hell is going on here, first?"

Still no one replies to her as they bundle her and her two agents into the back of a van. They are driven unknown to them, back to the Naval base for a de briefing session

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

As they arrive in the briefing room, they find their boss there with lots of men in suits, BRAVO team, Blackburn and Mandy

She's furious now having had no explanation  
"Does someone want to explain what's going on here?" she frowns at them all as they stop speaking "And get your hands off me!" she turns on the guy in the grey suit with his hand on her elbow as she was refusing to move once out of the van when no one explained anything

Everyone looks round at her but there's still silence in the room

"No?" she frowns impatient now "You know this was my operation.. 18 months and three dead agents and no one's going to tell how come some … " she pauses for a moment "…some Seal Team right? .. Walks in and takes out my target. Just like that, without a word to me about what's going on?"

"Cathy, you need to calm down! Right now,… this is out of our hands!"

"What? Wait… No! Sir… I…."

"I know .. but this… this is more complicated …. So, I'm sorry!"

"No! No, no!... This is Bull shit! … I'm not having that … I got this to trial… and now you let these .. . these Yahoos come in and take over?… Sir… we lost three agents to Martinez … one of the them…. " she closes her eyes as he interrupts her

"I know" he looks at her sympathetically "Cathy I know how hard this is to let go but… that's the way it has to be … I know what this means to you… personally and I'm sorry but … events have taken over!"

"Events? What events? … Does someone care to explain?"

"I'm sorry. We can't … it's classified… and you won't be able to speak of this to anyone"

"Huh!" she frowns at the large guy in the black suit. She thinks he looks like a celebrity bodyguard "You walk in steal my operation… an operation I've worked on night and day and you take the body and tell me not to talk about it"  
She rubs her head confused "What about the trial? The media? What am I gonna tell them? … He just disappeared?"

"You're not gonna tell them anything"

"But they'll wanna know.. they've been following this for months!"

"And we'll take care of it"

She rubs her head "So that's it?.. .It's just over…Like that?"

Her boss is beside her now and puts his hand on her shoulder "Cathy I know!...but we got the son of a bitch. He can't hurt anyone else now"

"No!" she takes a deep breath "No!...We didn't. Death was too good for him… he deserved to rot in jail… that's what he feared most!" she shakes her head "You don't get it do you?" she looks round the room at them all sitting there awkwardly trying not to look at her.

Jason does look up. He feels for her, he can see this case meant a lot and he knows how he would have felt to have lost three team members.

She gives a rye laugh and shakes her head watching him sat there still all in his combat gear looking very imposing and important  
"Yeah and I suppose you'll get all the glory now" she sighs again "How the big bad seal team came in and took at out the bad guy!"

Jason awkwardly rubs his chin as he starts to offer an explanation. Even if no one else does, he thinks she should be offered one "Look .. I'm sorry …."

He's rapidly cut off mid-sentence by one of the guys in a suit. Jason has no idea who these guys are as one puts his hand on his shoulder  
"Master Chief Hayes .. this is not for discussion with unauthorized personnel"

Jason shakes head and closes his eyes he just wanted to explain but he knows he can't  
"Yeah Right!" he, like her, thinks its bull shit too, but he can't say it.

She shakes her head disappointed "Unauthorized personnel?… Right! Well at least I know where I stand!"

"Look … Cathy we did good today" her boss Director Somerville puts his hand on her shoulder again and she brushes him off "We saved an Agents life. Let's focus on that!"

She nods and takes a deep breath. It's the only compensation for today she can find as she looks round at Mandy and nods

"You know what… I need a drink! As you don't seem to need me here .. I'd like to be dismissed"

Director Somerville looks round at the suits then back to her and nods "Sure… but…. don't go too far .. we may still need to clear some paperwork"

"Fine!... I guess there's a bar round here somewhere, Right!" she shakes her head, running her hands through her hair and pulling her ponytail tight.  
Jason watches her and laughs to himself. She so reminds him of someone else right now.

She gets to the door but just before she leaves she turns back  
"I just want you all to know this is bullshit .. so, you pat yourselves on the back all you like! but that's what it is!" she leaves and slams the door behind her

Sonny smiles and laughs as he looks at Clay "She sure got some spark, I'll give her that!"

Jason rubs his chin "She sure got a right hook too!" he laughs.

Ray nods as he watches Jason watching her leave "She remind you of anyone?"

Clay smiles and nods at Ray "Yeah just a bit!"

Ray rolls his eyes, he has to admit he's concerned as he watches Jason still staring at the door where she left.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She sits at the bar alone her back to the door and orders another  
"Vodka on the rocks, make it a double this time!"

Bravo enter the bar with Mandy. They're all smiles. Jason puts his arm round Mandy and kisses the top of her head

"I'm just glad we got you back safe!"

"Me too!" she smiles at him

"Yeah who else could I count on to give me advice when I'm doin' somethin' stupid hey?"

She laughs "I best buy you a drink to say thanks!"

"Ohhh!" Sonny nods towards Agent Powell as they watch her drinking at the bar alone

Jason stops where he is just watching her sitting there as she runs her hand through her hair re tying her long dark ponytail again and just for a moment he catches himself and takes a breath as she reminds him of CJ so much.

Ray looks at him he knows exactly what he's thinking "Jace, .. you okay?"

"Yeah sure…" he looks Ray in the face "Yeah I'm good!… Look I'll get the drinks"

Sonny looks up at Ray now they both have the same thoughts in their heads.

"Get you another?"

She smiles and looks round at Jason "Sure. Why not… you've ruined my day already … listening to you lot gloating about _your_ little trophy hunt will make it a whole lot better. So, I guess you buying me a drink is the least you can do!"

"Hey come on.. we didn't do this on purpose. I didn't know it was gonna turn out this way!"

She sits for a minute staring at her drink  
"No I guess not…" she sighs realising she's probably being overly harsh " Just I had … months of work invested in this …I had him, right there"  
She turns and looks Jason full in the face "I had him on the ropes .. he was squirming for a way out .. another week and he would have been right where he didn't want to be… in jail"

"Hey, we got him though.. one way or another .. he can't hurt anyone else now!"

"Yeah!... Yeah, _you_ did!"

"And …. it saved a life. So that's good, right?"

She looks round at Mandy "Your little CIA agent…" she frowns looking at him trying to work out if there's something more, something personal there he has invested in Mandy.

She sighs again " Yeah I guess so ..but what about the three dead DEA agents, the ones he already took? .. What about their lives.. What do I tell their families?"

"That you got the bad guy"

"Yeah!" she sits looking at her drink "Yeah… I'm sure they're gonna be well pleased to hear that … maybe they'll feel that was justice… maybe they won't!"

The drinks arrive "Look why don't you come join us?"

"Are you taking the piss now?" She laughs

"No!" Jason frowns at her aggression wondering why she would think that

She shakes her head "I think I'll just stay here and drown my sorrows, Cheers!"

"Alright .. don't say I didn't try to be friendly"

She laughs as he walks away. She closes her eyes and sighs to herself regretting her snappy tone  
"Shit!" She rubs her head. She feels tired now as she sits biting her lip "Dammit! He didn't deserve that!" she looks round watching him join the others at the table.

The other DEA agents have all been cleared by debriefs and join them in the bar. She looks round as she can see them celebrating it all as a win.  
She doesn't blame them but its not something she can celebrate, not yet anyway.

"So, what's her problem?" Clay asks one of the DEA guys

"Oh .. you know .. shes a woman does she have to have a reason" he laughs and looks at Clay "No! seriously .. Who knows what her problem is?"

Jason rubs his chin "Yeah well I don't think she likes me"

Agent Cross laughs "Oh I don't know .. the fact she didn't shoot you .. tells me she must like you a bit!" he laughs

Jason frowns at him

"Look …" he leans in he doesn't want to be overheard gossiping "It's hard for her .. and I probably shouldn't say this . .. one of the agents he killed two years ago was an undercover DEA agent… Marc Powell…" he raises his eyes and looks round checking he's not being heard "… her husband!"

"Oh Shit!" Jason looks round at her watching as she still sits alone at the bar. "Wow!" he sighs _"Now I get the problem"_

"Yeah… she didn't take it too well.. so, bringing Martinez down .. it's been her mission, her focus… an obsession if you like. She was like a cat with a mouse, it's all she's thought about since. All she wanted was to put him behind bars for a very long time... well we all did… but he got what he deserved in the end, so I'll drink to that!"

They all raise their glasses. Cross looks round at the rest of the guys "Anyone up for earning some cash and beat me a pool?" he smiles

"Yeah!.. Why not" they all get up and head to the pool tables

"Jace…" Ray frowns at him ".. you coming. Take their money?"

"Yeah! ..I'll be right there" Jason stops for a minute lost in his own thoughts "errm… I'm just gonna get another drink"

Ray nods "Sure!… Jace…" he puts his hand on his arm "be careful"

Jason looks confused

Ray thinks for a moment before he shares what's in his head "She's not her… just. .. I can see what you're thinking… you know what I'm sayin' brother?"

Jason nods "It's fine… Ray, it's nothing to worry about, alright!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jason sits beside her at the bar, and she looks round at him then back over to the pool tables

"What they abandoned you?... or you just wanna annoy me some more?" She sips her drink

"Oh that .." he also looks at them playing pool. He can see Ray watching him " I didn't fancy it"

She puts her hand up to the barman "I'll have another .. and whatever he's having … it's been a tough day!" She raises her glass and finally cracks a smile at Jason

He stares at her. Watching her. Looking at her features. He knows what he's looking for but it's not there.

"Yeah ..I guess it has" he takes a sip from his beer "Look .. they told me about your husband… I'm sorry okay"

She shakes her head and sighs "Right…. Yeah! .. they told you what a sad case I am… that I had all my life wrapped in getting Martinez… bringing him to justice. .. Great!"

"No!... They.." he's interrupted by his phone "Excuse me .. just need to take this .."

She frowns at him and carries on drinking her drink as she listens to him on the phone.

"Hey Mom.. What is it?... Yeah I'll be back soon…. Yeah, put him on!" Jason puts his phone on video call and JC's face comes on screen "Hey buddy … Grandma says it's bedtime"

She can hear a child's voice and looks round trying not to make it obvious she's listening to him interacting on the call

"Yeah, Daddy be home soon .. you be a good boy… I love you!" he switches his phone off and smiles "Sorry about that… he ummm wanted to see me before bed"

She frowns at him and now softens her attitude "You got kids?"

"Yeah!" he nods then looks at her "Three!... Well my girl, Emma, she's away at college"

"That one.." she nods indicating his phone "He's only small, right?"

"Yeah! He's nearly three!"

She nods working things through in her head "So you married?"

"I was .. My _wife_ died" he takes a moment letting her process the information ".. and Jaycee…" he points at his phone "His ummm.. his Mom died as well"

She gulps "Wow!.. I'm sorry .. I mean woah! That's a lot of responsibility.. I mean .. I found being married with this job hard enough .. but kids … and tragedy … that's a lot.. with your job?" she frowns at him, finding a sudden respect for his circumstances

"Yeah!" he sighs thinking about it "It's taken time …to get where I'm at with it. I've got my mom, and some really good friends ..Got my team.." he looks round at them drunkenly play fighting and laughs "… they've kept me going, through the toughest bits"

She sits quietly nodding for a moment "So his Mom .. how did she die?"

"Hmmm .. You know how it is .. I can't talk about what she did… its complicated"

She nods "Yeah….. That's tough … Look.. I'm sorry and ….. I'm sorry for hitting you earlier .. I shouldn't have done that.. I didn't know"

"It's okay, why should you and… emotions were running high… I can see why you were pissed off.. I get it .. I do!"

She nods and sighs and looks at her empty glass "Look ... I should get off"

As she gets up to leave Jason stops her "You had something to eat?.. I mean .. we could errm grab something … if you wanted?" he shrugs

She looks at him and smiles "You seem very nice but .. I'm not good company …. I wouldn't be much fun and errm …I'm not good at the whole dating thing"

"Hey, look I'm not asking you on a date …just do you wanna get some food?.. Mainly cos I'm starving"

She smiles and laughs watching him "Not a date!... okay well maybe.. but I thought you needed to put your kid to bed?"

"Well….I do but… we could grab a pizza .. I mean if you like pizza? .. and eat it at mine… then I can do both"

She laughs biting her lip thinking "Woah! and this is not a date?" she laughs again letting out a long sigh "I'm not sure I'm cut out for the whole kid thing!...small children. They…"

Jason laughs "Well…. I think you'll like Jaycee … he's err .. kinda a rebel right now!"

She laughs and looks round at the guys playing pool. She takes a moment, biting her lip thinking " Oh you know… what the hell! Why not… Ive bitten enough peoples heads off today and …. I am hungry!"

"Come on!"

"You don't wanna say goodbye?"

"What and give them something else to talk about?... No!" he smiles as she nods and gets off the stool and follows him to the door

Ray looks over as he sees them now leaving he stops playing pool

"Hey Ray… your turn!" Sonny looks at him "What' up?"

"Oh nothing… well at least I hope not"

Sonny looks over "Oh! … Looks like they made up?... Hey.. you know if Jace gets back in the saddle might be better for us all, you don't think? I mean she was pretty feisty .. might do him some good!"

"Hmmm!" Ray frowns "You might right … I just hope he's doing it for the right reasons. Not cos he's looking for a ghost!"

Sonny sighs "Let's hope not then!" he looks at Ray and they both watch as they disappear out the doorway to the bar.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She looks around the living room while Jason's gone to sort Jaycee who was crying.

Looking at all the pictures on the dresser picking up the one of CJ and Jaycee. She sips her beer as she studies it. She frowns to herself "Hmmm!"

"Pizza should be here in a minute!"

She's slightly startled as Jason comes back in the room and she smiles as she turns around. Jason's carrying JC  
"I'm just gonna try and put him down again. It won't take long!"

She nods "Hey little man" she smiles as she takes hold of his small hand that he stretches out to her before putting out both arms willing her to hold him  
"You want to?" Jason frowns as he offers him to her to hold

"Oh errm …I'm not good with small children or even large ones for that matter… I mean they're kinda delicate.. I might drop him or something"

"Trust me there is nothing delicate about this boy …. Here .." he hands him over and he pulls at her ponytail

"Awww!" she grimaces as he tugs on her hair and she unwraps his small hand

"Told ya!" Jason smiles

"He's got a firm grip for sure" she smiles back

"I'll get his milk"

She turns to look at the photos again while nervously holding him on her hip "Mommy!"

"Sorry what?" she frowns at him

"Mommy!" he puts his head on her shoulder as she holds him.  
He lets out a small yawn and closes his eyes. She smiles at how peaceful he looks as she holds his head against her. As she turns, Jason's stood in the doorway just watching her.

Her long dark hair in a ponytail and JC nearly asleep on her shoulder. He sighs as he hears Jaycee call out "Mommy"

As she looks at him Jason slightly blushes for watching her "I'm sorry about that.. her just.. he doesn't understand ..." he awkwardly smiles

She watches him and nods as she looks back at the photos again "Its fine .. he's just a child .. must be confusing for him?"

Jason nods

She watches Jason watching her and after moment speaks "As long as its not for his dad?... I mean confusing … cos errm.. you know" she nods towards the photo

Jason nods "I gotta be honest … it did take me back a moment there .. but No!... No, I'm good with it.. not looking for something that's not here"

She nods "Good .. because… " she stops in the sentence as the doorbell rings "Oh! Here.." she hands Jaycee back to Jason as the awkward moment gets interrupted "I'll get it probably be the pizza… You put him to bed!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She dishing the pizza up in the kitchen as Jason comes back through  
"Hey! ….Is he asleep?"

"Yeah!.. Finally,"  
She smiles and hands him a beer and clicks hers against his "Here's to family and … the good guys!"

Jason nods as he takes the beer from her hand "Yeah .. its been a good day! … I guess we laid a few ghosts to rest?"

She nods "Yeah .. maybe" she smiles as she watches him as he brushes her hair back from her face  
"Pizza?" she hands him a slice trying to diffuse the awkward moment she can feel building

Jason takes a bite from the slice "It's good…. Wanna try?" he offers the slice to her and she bites a piece off

"Mmm! It is good…. " she coughs not sure what to really do now.. "You know perhaps I should get off.. I mean errrm…. It's been a long day"

Jason puts the pizza down and puts his hands either side of her on the worktop. She looks both sides and nervously rubs her head

He takes a moment watching her "or you could stay?"

She watches him their eyes reading each other  
"Look.. I'm … not sure that's a good idea.. not you know .. today.." she's awkwardly finding reasons to say no "Its been a … "

He leans in again and kisses her, but she pulls back embarrassed "You know..… I'm not sure about this. I mean … "

He nods "You mean what?"

She nods blushing "It's not like .. I don't think it would be nice .. but…. you know. I mean I quite like the idea, but… I'm not sure we should"

He nods "Okay… and we shouldn't because?"

She shrugs "because…." She sighs. Now her head is in dilemma as he leans in again.

She closes her eyes and thinks about it as his lips touch hers.  
It's been so long since she was close to someone like this but she can feel a flicker of excitement inside.  
She has to admit it's the first time in two years she's felt this kind of spark. She smiles watching him as he runs his hand down her neck

"You know I can't think of one damn reason why not!" she smiles and puts her hand to the back of his head and pulls him forward to kiss her again.


	70. Chapter 70

**Chapter 71: Buy me a drink**

Sorry this story won't leave me alone. So there has to be a few more chapters, I guess, because a few things were left unexplained. :)

"Hi" Mandy smiles at Jason as she enters the room. Looking around she then sits herself at the opposite side of the table from where he's leaning back in his chair.

"Heyyyy! " He smiles "Lookin good there Mandy!" He pushes his hat back an looks up at her as she pulls out the chair "So, how're you doin? And how was the vacation? "

"Oh um.. yeah... you know. Beach was nice. Bar was better but I .. I gotta say, I'm not so good at kicking my heels up." She sighs "Actually is it wrong for me to say I was bored? And If I'm honest I'm just really glad to be back at work"

"Yeah, but you're not pushing yourself, right? You did take time out? Do some relaxing, some recovery? I mean after everything you went through. You do know, you need time. A lot went on there Mandy. Don't just ignore it."

"Oh, I didn't know you cared so much Jason." She smiles "I'm good so don't worry."

"Yeah well you know, you gave us all a bit of a scare there with that stunt you pulled"

"The stunt I pulled?" She frowns and smiles puzzled

"Yeah you know saying you were getting married, gave us all a bit of a shock. Don't do anything like that again!" he laughs

"I'll try and remember" She smiles "But you'll be glad to hear that I'm fine. Guess its part and parcel of the job right? Just another day!"

"Well I don't know if getting held hostage and facing death is what you call an everyday work but..." he laughs holding her hand "I for one am glad to have you back!"

She lets out a deep breath looking at his fingers and she wraps her hand tightly around his. She smiles at him, looking at his face, studying the lines, his stubble, his lips and then looking him in the eyes. He looks a lot less tired than she remembers and there's a glint in those eyes that's returned, that hadn't been there for a long time

"So how are you? And how is the Agent Powell doing these days?" she smiles, as she bites the edge of her lip curious to know if Jason's still seeing the DEA agent.

 _Hmmm!_ He smiles, letting out a long sigh. He can see the curiosity bubbling just below the surfaces of her brown eyes " Yeah, yeah she's good. Still feisty, and we're taking it slow for now. Anyway, she's always pretty busy, always away. You know Mandy, it's weird, being on the other side, me worrying about her. Being out of the loop on what _she's_ doing. What dangers she might be getting into. That I'm the one having to put her job to the back of my mind and carry on. It's not easy for sure!"

He runs his hand through his hair leaning back, anxiously chewing his gum as he opens up about his feelings. If there's one thing he's learned since CJ's death it's to open up a lot more about how he's feeling. "Guess it works both ways, she still worries about what I do. Sure, keeps me on my toes" He smiles "You know Mandy, I'm so glad you're doin alright. I thought we'd lost ya there for a minute. I'm not sure I could've lived with that, not having you to keep me in line. Haul my ass out of the shit every now and again!"

"Yeah well..." she smiles "be nice to get back to doing it. You know hauling your ass out! Now that the dust has finally settled on everything else. Well, at least I hope it has."

"You hope?" he frowns "What the hell does that mean"

"Oh um... nothing" She smiles awkwardly toying with the edges of the files that she laid on the desk

"No c'mon Mandy ...we've known each other long enough. I know when you got somethin on your mind. So, what the hell is it?" He frowns studying her face, the fake-ness of the smile she puts on to try and cover whatever it is she's trying to hide " You didn't just come here for the pleasure of my company, did you?"

"Yeah!" she smiles "Yeah of course I did" She knows she's not fooling him. The truth is she did come here to tell him more but now seeing him, seeing that happy freshness back in his face. Well now, now she's not sure if she's doing the right thing contemplating even telling. _Maybe I should just forget it?_

"What is it? " he sits up straight in his chair, leaning across the table, staring at her "Mandy, c'mon spill. There somethin I should know about? Has something happened, should I be concerned?"

"No, no nothing's happened" she sighs "Look I'm really not even sure what it is yet, so maybe I shouldn't say anything, not until I've checked it out further"

"But you came here, with the intention of telling me ? Whatever this thing is? "

"Maybe. Maybe, until I saw how happy you look. How that tiredness has gone from you. Maybe that's why I'm so uncertain that telling you is the best idea!"

"Yeah well we both know you're going to. You know as well as I do, that there's no way I'm letting you walk out of here without giving me some idea what this is all about"

"Yeah ... yeah stupid on my part. Look, this time off, vacation. Well it gave me a chance to read, check through all of my emails, clear out my inbox, spam box you know... stuff I don't get to look at sometimes."

"You're stallin, so get to the point!"

"Well .. you remember that hacker friend of my mine, Toby." She looks around the room

"The one that got killed in a car accident. The hit and run guy."

"Yeah. Yeah well ... he um... he sent me some emails. They came on an auto send a week or so ago"

"So how the hell did that happen? I mean, I thought he was dead? It even made the news channels"

"Um... well all I can think is that he'd set them up to send them automatically, if...if something untoward happened to him. He was super cautious with stuff like that." she laughs "He used to have contingency plans for everything. He was one of these end of the worlder's. Had a cellar full of tinned foods, that kinda thing. Always ranting on about Government conspiracies everywhere. That's what made him so good at getting information, he questioned everything. Every small detail. Stuff no one else would notice then follow a trail. So .. probably made a backup plan. I mean if he didn't get to speak with me in person "

"Okay so that in itself is kinda weird. But then he was a kinda weird guy, no offence meant! Anyway .. go ahead, so what about the emails?"

"Well they're fairly interesting, though as I said, I haven't had a chance to follow them up properly yet. I've just given them a quick scan" she sighs "Look, I'm really not sure how far I should delve into this, or if I should just leave it be now."

"Well I'd guess that depends... what they're about and why you're telling me? Mandy, you've done this job long enough, you know if there's something you should follow up. So why you playin so hard to get with it?" He looks at her. The look in her face, the nervous apprehension the self-doubt.

She looks nervously around the room, hesitating . She can see Clay, Ray and Sonny in the corner. Sonny's still asleep under his hat. Ray's working at the laptop, and Clay's browsing the internet on his phone.

She bites her lip, now turning her attention to Jason, he's staring at her across the table as she twitches her hand on the cover of the light brown folder in front of her. To open it or not?

" Look we should probably leave this alone. Maybe digging the past up is not good for either of us right now"

"Digging the past up? " he frowns, watching her toy with the edge of the cardboard on the file "So, this somethin to do with CJ?"

She lets out a long-resigned sight and nods silently "Yeah!"

"Oh wow!" He takes a breath sitting back in his seat. He frowns looking at her. His expression questioning her motives. Taking his hat off his hand are in his hair. "You know what... I don't think I wanna know!"

He looks around looking at Clay. He glances up from this cell phone and smiles apprehensively over at Jason "You know Mandy, we've all moved on. Maybe it would be better to leave the ghosts in the past, yeah?"

"Maybe..." she sighs " I wondered the same thing. Until this.. .then I wondered, but what if it not ghosts? What if it's real people, real lives. Or more importantly, what if potentially real family? Would you want that left in the past? JCs some potential family, what if they already here? Here in the future."

"Family? What family? What does that mean? Whose family, Mandy?" he frowns "You mean CJs family ? But I thought she didn't have any more. No one came to the funeral. No one called me, offered their condolences. What you think I should worry? You think someone might come for JC"

"No, no, nothing like that! No don't worry about that... . but maybe... what if he did have other family? Look, like I told you I haven't had any time to check all this out and I don't know exactly what's going on!" she sighs pushing the file forward "And I don't know who this person is. I'm working on it though. And these account details, they were all sent to me. And this it was in with some financial reports, and the other emails he sent. Jason this is a copy of a highly restricted classified file!"

"So why bring it up now, if you've not checked it out. I mean this might be nothing, right?"

"Maybe. But um... well something caught my eye, and I did a ... a little surface checking, not that I went too deep. Cos like I said, I wasn't sure how far you wanted me to make that hole. Maybe you wanna leave it all inside this file and I'm happy to do that. Go forward or leave it. Whichever you decide."

"Alright, well... if it's enough to come to your attention... then you got mine!" He takes a deep breath, wondering if he might just regret saying that "Hit me with it! Then' ll decide what to do with what I know"

"Alright! But you sure? Cos once you see, you can't unsee it?"

"Yeah sure! Go ahead. He frowns at the look on her face, he laughs" What you gonna tell me CJs alive? Cos I know damn well that's not true! I saw her die in my arms... " he sighs now getting emotional "And I saw her body before the funeral, so I know that's not it. That's not what you're gonna tell me!"

"No, no not quite. Okay then... " She opens the beige file in front of her, turning some of the pages of reports and financial print outs until she gets to a large black and white photograph which she turns on the table so she can push it in front of him, for him to read.

"Wat the hell is this?!" He snaps angrily "This some kinda god damn joke, Mandy? I just told you .. " Jason frowns " What you said that this wasn't about ghosts so what the hell is this? Just why do you have a photograph of CJ? I just told you... she's dead! What the hell are you trying to do to me, Mandy?"

"Nothing" She sighs "You're not looking. Look again! Carefully this time!"

Jason looks around he's finding it difficult. Just the mere glimpse of the photo sent his emotions into meltdown and he bites his lip "I can't, I can't look at her. God damn I don't even have photos at home of her..." He closes the file, pushing it back towards her. He sighs " So what is it?"

Mandy opens the file again and slides it across the table. Its laid there full exposed in front of him. He can't help but look at it now. "Look again Jason! This time look at _her!_ " Mandy sighs, watching him study the photo "Jason,... Jason, it's _not_ CJ"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o**

Clay frowns looking up from his phone he watches Jason and Mandy "Hey..." he kicks at the sleeping Sonny's leg "What's going on over there?"

Sonny frowns, lifting his hat up. Looking over at Jason and Mandy "I dunno, maybe going over some old files, or somethin like that? Who the hell cares ? Just as long as it aint nothing to do with us. Then I'm fine with whatever it is they're doing?

"Well they look like their up to something to me. I mean Jason looks tense"

"Jason looks tense to you?" Sonny laughs "And you can tell that from sittin right here? Wow! Wow Clay, that's some impressive superpowers you got goin on! And anyway, don't take no powers of deduction, Jason always looks tense. It's what he does best. I told ya... don't worry about it! Now go do something more useful, and somewhere else. Let me sleep!"

Sonny watches as Clay keeps staring he can see the wheels in his brain turning over and he knows he's not going to leave it alone. There's a suspicion and probably rightly, they do look like they're plotting something. Engaged deep in a hushed conversation

"Oh hell Clay, why you doin this? It's Mandy and Jason!" he shrugs "Who knows what the hell they're cookin up?! My life is not meant to involve itself in whatever Miss Mandy might be up to with Jason, or not!"

"No! No sonny I don't mean that! I mean what are they discussing, something in that file she has on the desk . You think it's some new target package? Maybe something interesting this time. What I wanna know is why she's discussing it with Jason, first. Since when did she do that"  
He turns around nudging Ray. He's still wrapped up reading reports, lost deep in thought on his laptop "Hey Ray! What the hell is that about over there? You know anythin?"

"No brother, not me!" Ray shrugs "Well nothing he's shared with me, so far, man. Hey, don't worry about it. I'm sure we'll find out if anything comes from it, and if we need to know, right?"

Sonny closes his eyes again. Ray goes back to his list. But Clay sits staring, watching their body language "You want a coffee Sonny? Hey Sonny?" he shakes his head realising Sonny's asleep

"You want more coffee Ray?"

"Um.. yeah, yeah sure. Only if you're getting up though"

"Yeah, I'll go"

Clay frowns picking up Ray and his own cup. Then he heads over to the machine that is on the unit behind where Mandy and Jason are talking. He slowly pours the coffee into the two cups and then he slowly looks around ,and smiles.

He can just about make out the photograph laying in the open file and he silently gasps. Then he has an obvious frown as he watches them "Hey Jason, Mandy, you wanna coffee?"

Mandy looks up "Oh um... hey Clay!" She turns smiling, Clay stood by her left shoulder and she quickly closes the cardboard cover on the file.

A little too late as he gets a full look at the printed photo. "What's that about? " He looks at them both and frowns

Jason looks away and saying nothing He coughs "It's nothin. That's what it is. Nothin ! It's the past and that's where it stays" He gets up "I'll catch you later Mandy. Glad to have you back, by the way !"he kisses her cheek and leaves.

Clay frowns "So, what's his problem? Something to do with that?" .

"Oh no. No that's just clearing up some old paperwork!" she smiles, changing the subject "So... you good Clay, you all mended now ? "

"Yeah I'm good. So how you finding life back in the field? It feel kinda strange?

"You know what no! No actually it feels stranger, being away. Not sure what to do with myself in downtime"

"Oh, you should be like Sonny. Just sleep!" he laughs

"I heard that Spenser! I'll have you know I do not _just_ sleep I will have you know that I... sleep like a hibernating bear!"

"Yeah!" Clay laughs " Yeah a bear with a sore head most of the time!"

Clay frowns then he passes the cup of coffee to Mandy. As he stands it down for her, he _accidentally_ knocks it over "Oh shit! Oh god Mandy! God, I'm sorry!" he squeals in pretend horror, watching as the hot coffee tips all over her lap.

She jumps from her seat, the heat and the mess "Oh shit!...Oh shit, I need to clean this up. I have a meeting in thirty minutes!"

"Oh god! I am so sorry! Totally my fault. Tell you what you go clean up and I'll clear this up desk. Don't worry Mandy. I'm sure if you wet it quick, it won't stain" he smiles " I'm so sorry can't believe I'm so clumsy. God I feel terrible"

He starts wiping the coffee off the table, spreading it over her clothes even more "Clay Stop! You're just making it worse. Shit! Look, I'll be back from these things in a minute. I need to wipe this before the stains!"

"Hey, there's a hand drier, in the bathrooms. Maybe you can dry it out, if you're quick!"

She frowns at him sighing. She's so annoyed as she looks at her skirt and blouse now soaked in dark brown coffee stains "Just go Mandy! Before it dries in. I'll take care of this!"

He looks up as she leaves the room. Then he looks over in Sonny and Ray's direction. Checking,  
Sonny's still in land of Z'ds under his cap and Ray's engrossed reading some stuff he found with regards to his promotion.

Clay looks around taking his cell phone from his pocket, he sits himself, with his coffee, at the desk.

Casually he swings the chair around. Then he slowly and subtly, slides the beige file he saw out on the desk earlier. The one that was in front of Mandy, and he lifts the edge of the cover.

He can see the black and white photograph from earlier "Oh my god! What the hell?" He frowns, then he flicks the rest of the photographs his eyes darting back and forward to the doorway to the office, checking for movements on the other side of the room, or indeed Mandy's return.

He takes out his cell phone and hurriedly clicks photos of all of the pages and paperwork in the file, including the financial statements. Then he pushes the contents back inside and closes the cover on it. But, just before he puts it back in the pile, he takes one more look at the large black and while photograph. He frowns puzzled by the picture "CJ?" he questions his own eyes

"Clay!"

He gasps looking up sharply as Sonny call his name. He gulps nervously, wondering for a moment if he's been caught. Then, putting the file back. He looks up and smiles

" Hey Sonny was sup man?"

"Clay, you got more coffee in that pot. If so I'll have one!" Sonny lifts his hat and looks at him "What you doin' there, man?"

"Oh, nothing. Just sittin. Sittin and drinkin coffee. I'll get you some!"

 **o-o-o-o-o-o-**

Mandy meets Jason in the bar. She smiles "So..."

"So..."

"here we are again". She smiles again "And so soon"

"Look... " Jason sighs "...I don't know why I asked you here. But... well, I can't stop thinking about that intel you pulled. And what you said. That photograph wasn't CJ ?! So..who the hell is it then?"

"Got your curiosity, did I?" she laughs "I knew it would! I told you, I only did a surface dig."

"Come on Mandy! We both know that you never _surface dig_ anything. So, tell me ... what's this all about. And what do you know?"

"Why don't you buy me a drink first Jason?! Then we'll talk" She smiles, pulling the file out of her bag "I'll have a large vodka soda!"


End file.
